Karl Lagerfeld moves on from Heidi Klum, now hates Audrey Tautou

The one-sided war of attrition between Karl Lagerfeld and Heidi Klum has been briefly cancelled. It seems Dame Lagerfeld’s newest enemy is none other than French actress Audrey Tautou. American audiences will know Audrey from The DaVinci Code, and the Oscar-nominated French film Amelie. She’s currently promoting her role as the young Coco Chanel in Coco Avant Chanel. The film has caused some minor controversy here and there – Audrey’s casting as Coco wasn’t universally loved, and there was some rabble-rousing over the images of cigarettes and smoking in the posters.

Though Lagerfeld is the fashion director for Chanel, he doesn’t have a say in anything other than the clothing line. So Audrey Tautou wasn’t even Karl’s choice to replace Nicole Kidman as the face of Chanel No. 5 – nor was Karl involved in Coco Avant Chanel, although the director recently claimed Karl had given his blessing. What seemed to set off the anger bear this time was a recent interview with Audrey, where she didn’t seem to gush over Chanel clothing. Karl responded in turn, saying “After that, I don’t have to be nice.” What’s French for “bitchslap”?

There’s no love lost between Chanel’s couturier Karl Lagerfeld and Audrey Tautou, the petite French actress who stars in the latest No.5 commercial and the film “Coco Before Chanel.” Lagerfeld was not involved in either project, but he took Tautou to task for remarks in an interview in a recent issue of Premiere in France. Asked if she wears a lot of Chanel, she replied: “Sometimes. This morning, I wore the rain boots.”

“I didn’t even know we made rain boots,” quipped Lagerfeld. “After that, I don’t have to be nice.” If he had his druthers, Lagerfeld said he would have suggested Penélope Cruz as a better role model for the storied French house.

[From Women’s Wear Daily]

How in the world would Penelope Cruz have done better? I don’t understand. Coco was French. It’s best if she’s played by a French woman. I just looked up pictures of Coco, and Audrey Tautou looks eerily similar to her. What goes on in Karl Lagerfeld’s deranged mind? And why don’t I have Chanel rain boots? Which do exist, by the way, Dame Lagerfeld. All in all, I doubt this will become the kind of hateful, one-sided feud that Karl had with Heidi. But you can never tell with Karl. He’s like a bright orange snake wearing dark sunglasses that jumps up to bite you when you least expect it.

Audrey Tatou is shown on 5/4/09 (mustard-colored dress) credit: WENN.com and 2/28/08 (silver skirt and white jacket) credit: Fame Pictures. Karl Lagerfeld is shown on 7/7/09 and 6/28/09. Credit: WENN.com

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50 Responses to “Karl Lagerfeld moves on from Heidi Klum, now hates Audrey Tautou”

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  1. Praise St. Angie! says:

    pardon me, but Karl is just a c-nty old fart with saggy balls who’s trying to stay relevant.

  2. Neelyo says:

    He looks like a death’s head on a rattle made of bone that some witch doctor would wave while chanting.

  3. BlueSkies says:

    Vagina envy, Karl! I’ve always had a gay guy best friend but then there are these messy queens who are worse than the cattiest women. Maybe Karl has syphyllis, tertiary stage or dementia. There’s a term for these types, a la Perez. It’s called c**tjuice.

  4. nelly says:

    This guy should be taken to another planet.

  5. Benjamin says:

    I must say that, as much as I always hate what he says, I do love it when Karl Lagerfeld opens his crazed claptrap. That old queen’s brand of crazy is pure comic gold.

  6. SolitaryAngel says:

    That’s pretty pathetic, coming from an old fart who wears the SAME G*DDAMNED THING day in and day out.

  7. Ashleylk says:

    I love Audrey Tautou. She’s so lovely. Amelie is one of my favorite films.

  8. vale says:

    He really is a dinosaur if he forgets we can just google whether chanel rain boots exist or not.

  9. Ron says:

    Karl Lagerfeld is no doubt a great fashion talent. However, unlike say YSL, who retired and left the public eye before he became irrelevant, Karl has hung in there to the point that he is now just a bitchy old has been queen who needs to go away and enjoy her retirement. Who cares what she thinks. Much like Anna Wintour, who cares anymore what a 70 year old has to say about what 20 year olds wear.

  10. Sauronsarmy says:

    Karl is 75 years old. That should give you some insight on how his brain is “working”. I was never a huge Karl fan he did some great things for the house. I still think if Coco were alive today she would punch Karl in the face for screwing up Chanel.

  11. smith says:

    This ghostly, pony-tailed, S&M-gloved, Count Von Dracula bejeweled, anorexic oddity with his oversized clown-in-mourning ties and anomatronic facial expressions seriously haunts my dreams.

    In these dreams my left thigh is larger than my right and I’m running through the rain, naked save for a pair of Chanel boots and a string of pearls.

    I waken to the taste of maple syrup in my mouth.

  12. ash says:

    If you look in the dictionary under “corpse”, youll find Karl.

  13. Cinderella says:

    Karl seriously needs to get laid.

  14. j. ferber says:

    Why the venom for Karl? He can say whatever he wants. And BlueSkies, that term is just vulgar and didn’t need to be imported over from some tacky gossip site. As we all know, Celebitchy is the queen of gossip sites. Let’s keep it classy.

  15. Trillion says:

    Benajmin: I second that. He’s hilarious from his translucent follicles to his crusty Austrian toenails.

  16. Ophelia says:

    Ok that’s it. I officially hate this crypt keeper. How can anyone hate her?!

  17. Kath Jaynes says:

    Audrey Tautou + Heidi Klum > Karl Lagerfeld

  18. Frenchie says:

    I think he would have loved Claudia Shiffer to play Coco … One day he said that he wasn’t making fashion for us (peon) but for models to wear it !! He probably think he is making Art pieces !!
    But he is funny. There is joan Rivers, well there is also Karl

  19. Trey says:

    I like the c-word. In moderation, of course, although it might apply here. Sometimes it applies to Perez Hilton as well… everybody else gets the douche label really. It applies to so many people! What wonderful things words are.

    PS- Anybody who hasn’t seen Amelie, for the love of good movies everywhere, GO RENT IT. Audrey rocks!

  20. the original kate says:

    he’s nothing but a bitter, woman-hating old queen trying to stay in the news.

  21. Feebee says:

    Why hasn’t someone slapped this pissy old hag?

  22. mE says:

    How in the hell do you not like Audrey Tautou? She was Amelie FFS.

    So what if she didn’t run off at the mouth about how wonderful Chanel is. It’s called tact.

  23. gee_gee says:

    I don’t know a damn thing about Coco Chanel (nor do I care). But Audrey Tatou is adorable. Painfully, ridiculously adorable. Why would you even think of being mean to such a person. It’s like punching a kitten.

  24. Persistent Cat says:

    Do you ever read a fashion magazine and they interview a model and ask her what her favourite lip gloss and face cream is and she always answers with a product from the line she represents? She’s supposed to do that. The line pays her a lot of money to represent them so if you are lucky enough to get to be the face of Chanel #5, you don’t appear to not be into it. I think he has a bit of a right to this hissy fit.

    I love all things Chanel. I can’t afford a purse so I settle for the make-up and the perfume. The ad up on the top right-hand side of this page for the Chanel knock-offs is making me angry. The knock-offs that are all over my city cheapen the beauty of Chanel.

  25. queenie says:

    …why doesn’t someone toss him back in his crypt and throw away the key…

  26. fizXgirl314 says:

    i don’t see how this spells lagerfeld hating tautou… he didn’t say anything particularly venemous… she does have ugly ears though :/

  27. Annabelle says:

    Yes, J Ferber, Karl can say whatever he wants… & so can we! Why the venom? He started it.

  28. Nebraska says:

    Has Karl Lagerfeld discovered a remedy for the swine flu or something? How is he relevant? The dude needs to smoke some weed, chill out, f#ck off and retire already!

  29. Gigi says:

    Coco Chanel was the fluke of her generation. If she hadn’t the lovers to finance her venture, her logo wouldn’t be seen today. And good on her right?
    But that doesn’t mean that her clothes are for everyone. Coco Chanel brought out her clothing line for really thin women. Now, the Chanel label is all about absurdity. Karl tries to cash in with outrageous designs that are sometimes beyond the pale or ridiculous. I don’t blame her for wearing the boots. It’s difficult to afford anything else.
    Chanel has ready to wear pantyhose for US$200.00. Pantyhose!
    And the most recent Lagerfeld designed handbag to resemble a Chanel shopping bag at US$2000.00 and up? Lagerfeld insults women each day.

  30. BlueSkies says:

    JFerber, if you are implying that I got that term from Perez’s site, you are mistaken. I don’t visit there. It’s an old term used by gay men to describe catty queens. Although, it is a little vulgar but so is douchebag. It’s the new douchebag. Tw*tjuice is more appealing?

  31. Obvious says:

    He needs to retire, along with every other still-in-business-but way too old person out there!

    I’m so sick of the older generation and their seriously OOOutdated ideas.

    Exit Stage Left!

  32. Persistent Cat says:

    Seriously Obvious, “Exit Stage Left”? I’m embarassed for you.

    Remember people, with any luck, we’ll all be that age.

    If you’re the face of a product, you don’t disrespect the manufacturer.

  33. L says:

    Love Audrey Tautou.

  34. Luci says:

    karl is a total idiot, and he likes to remind us from time to time

    I love penelope cruz of course, but as chanel?? come on!

  35. valupack says:

    Dear Karl- please kindly F-off. The rest of us in the real world have actual problems to deal with-thanks

  36. pukealina says:

    apart of karl’s being a little bitchy, in my opision he’s right about one thing. penelope cruz will be the ultimate choice for coco chanel.

  37. Asiont says:

    penelope cruz as coco?? that’s ridiculous idea. Audrey is an amazing actress, she’s french, cute and very similar to Coco, penelope has nothing in common and is totally different from chanel

  38. Anoneemouse says:

    If he put that much energy into loving people than the world would be a better place. Stop the unnecessary hate!

  39. Raven says:

    Karl looks like a bobblehead anymore. Plus, he’s sounding a bit senile.

  40. Bec says:

    My one story about Karl Lagerfeld: I used to work for a big name cookbook publisher and once, we received an unsolicited project from Karl Lagerfeld. After he lost a ton of weight, he thought it would be a good idea to publish a book of recipes. It was absolutely HI-LARIOUS. Imagine photos of what was presumably his home–a parallel dimension in which the 60s lives on forever-and images of the most horrible looking dishes I’ve ever seen. If you’ve ever read the blog “The Gallery of Regrettable Food,” then you’ll understand how funny this proposal actually was. Meat suspended in aspic! Roses carved from tomatoes! Disgusting shakes made with things that should never be combined. I held onto a copy for a while, then lost it. Oh, Lagerfeld. You!

  41. Tassi says:

    didn’t Audrey just push Chanel rain boots out of obscurity? Yea Audrey!

  42. Rebecca Joan says:

    Karl, you´re a genius when it comes to fashion… but when you open your mouth, you generally sound like a dud.
    And Audrey…
    nope, nothing to add about you, you´re perfection!
    And Cruz, oh Lord, give.me.a.break!
    Now she´s one over-rated phony!

  43. Embee says:

    I really don’t see the harm in what she said. When asked is she wore a LOT of Chanel she replied in the affirmative (“sometimes” she wears a lot) and then backed it up with an example of what she had worn from the line that very day…

    I thought it sounded like an authentic endorsement.

    Karl’s response merely reflects his overweaned ego, poor dear.

  44. Persistent Cat says:

    Karl wasn’t saying Penelope Cruz should play Coco Chanel, he said he would rather her repping for Chanel #5.

  45. Zaneta from Macedonia says:

    Audrey is a wonderful actress, also beautiful and very feminime. I love her, especially as Amelie. What makes her even better is that she put clothes in their right place – we all have to wear them, it is nice when we like them, but clothes and not the center of the world for normal people. She is only normal, sane, while unfortunately Karl is the opposite. Such a sad creature – a walking caricature.

  46. Sandi says:

    Lagerfeld mentored Schiffer for years because she’s German although others called HER large and clumsy on the catwalk. Apparently, he doesn’t like German models who don’t owe a considerable amount to him for their success–or could it be that he doesn’t like German models who make interracial marriages or a combination of the above??

    Who cares what Claudia Schiffer thinks?? She’s essentially, if not completely, out of modelling. His remark is remarkable for both its offensiveness and its stupidity!

    Audrey Tatou is a charming, adorable, and talented French actress advertising the most famous French perfume of the last century. One can’t help wonder what sort of problems are going on in Karl Lagerfeld’s mind…or on what planet he’s living….

  47. Codzilla says:

    I just cannot get over how ridiculous that man looks. He’s laughable.

  48. Kelly says:

    That guy just looks like he’s MADE of poor life-choices.

  49. GusUruguay says:

    She’s senil, not audrey, Karl!! Hahahaha

  50. Latricia says:

    It was dark when I woke. This is a ray of susihnne.