Ricki Lake and Christian Evans in 2012
Ricki Lake did an interview with PeopleTV’s Chatter. She talked a lot about her late ex husband, Christian Evans, who died by suicide in February, 2017. Ricki had filed for divorce from Christian in 2014 after two years of marriage but she had an on-off relationship with him, considered him the love of her life, and was hoping to “save” him (her words). This came up when she was asked “What’s one thing you would like to experience for the first time over again?” She talked about love, and about her relationship with Christian, as if it was a one off and she’ll never find it again. I ended up feeling so sorry for her! You can watch the video clip on People’s site and here’s what she said:
I found true love with my husband who passed so I’m hoping to find love again. I don’t think I will. I’m open to it, but I think what I had — I was so lucky to have found that, it’s what everybody wants in life. I had true, unconditional love so I’d like to have something along those lines again, but again I feel like lightning doesn’t strike twice. I’m open to it, but I had the real deal. I just didn’t have it as long as I wanted it.
He had a lot of self-esteem issues and a lot of demons. But I understood him, and he was someone that I think a lot of people misunderstood.
That’s really sad, not only that she lost him but also that she doesn’t think she’s going to find love again. My mom always says “if you think you can or you think you can’t you’re probably right.” (I just googled that and it’s a paraphrase of a quote from Henry Ford.)
People also includes quotes from an earlier interview they did with Ricki, including the part where she wanted to save Christian from his mental illness. She said “He wasn’t stable, and he was so fragile, but I was still in love with him, so there was something romantic about it. I wanted to save him.”
She’s still so hung up on that relationship. I don’t believe in “soul mates” nor do I consider love some magical occurrence that only happens once. We have so many options for meeting people now, finding someone to love takes work and also requires that you’re vulnerable and open to it. Despite what she says it doesn’t sound like Ricki is open to finding someone. She still sounds heartbroken to have lost Christian. That’s understandable, some heartbreak stays with us, and not everyone needs or wants a partner.
Ricki is promoting her new documentary, Weed the People, about medical marijuana. She opened so many people’s eyes with The Business of Being Born and I hope this film is a success for her.
With her Weed The People film partner, Abby Epstein.
photos credit: WENN
I’ve always liked Ricki Lake. I agree, I don’t believe in soulmates. I think I’ve been lucky to have a couple loves of my life. My ex husband and my current boyfriend both qualify.
It sounds like sh tried to save him when ultimately, he needed to save himself (and sadly he did not).
I hope lightning strikes once! 37 and had many relationships, some long term, but never felt truly in love.
Having been in a somewhat similar relationship with the same outcome, I wonder, in part, if she is romanticizing the memory. When they are gone it is so easy to forget the bad stuff, especially when the end is so sudden and tragic. There is a reason they divorced after such a short marriage and did not really get back together. It can also make you skittish and distrustful about another relationship, it certainly has in my case, wondering what may be going on behind the eyes/scenes, and it’s easier to believe the person that is gone was your one great, true, but tragic, love,
I feel sad for her. She is obviously still grieving deeply. Some people never do reach a stage where they want to look for a new partner. Others desperately need it and start looking right away perhaps almost too soon. She should do what is right for her.
Maybe I’m a little off today but this is really making me cry
I had no idea her husband died that way! How terrible.
I love the woman she’s become after watching her grow up.
I’m in my 40s and have never been on a date. I do agree that love is precious and rare. 90% of the relationships I see, people seem unhappy and constantly complain about each other. People settle, compromise, date for fun. But finding something fulfulling is so rare. It won’t happen for me, it won’t happen again for most who found it once.