Dane Cook: ‘It’s way cooler being Darth Vader than it is being Luke Skywalker’

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Dane Cook used to be the wrong kind of punchline – his name was a short-hand for cheap, dumb, bro-comedy. He was a famous comedian who was famous for not being that funny. His heyday was probably… like, 2003-07, I guess? But he was still doing tours and comedy specials up until about five years ago. That’s when he mostly took a break, focused on getting therapy and cleaning up his life, editing out the users and criminals (like his brother, who embezzled millions of dollars from him). And now Dane Cook is back. He got a somewhat nice spread in the Hollywood Reporter about his “comeback,” which involves a tour and some other stuff. You can read the Hollywood Reporter piece here – he talks about Louis CK accusing him of joke-stealing, his 20-year-old girlfriend and a lot more. Some highlights:

He was one of the first comedians to use the internet to effectively promote himself: He promoted his stand-up performances first on sites like MySpace (“I remember getting ready to play Madison Square Garden, I posted once on MySpace and without spending a dime on any promotion or advertising, we sold out”) and Napster, then on his own website (Cook spent $35,000 to set it up, nearly every penny he had at the time).

He knew that people had strong feelings either way: “One person would be like, ‘Dane Cook, man, this guy’s funny! And then the next guy is like, ‘He’s a douchebag! Nobody likes him!’ But I was almost giddy to be that guy. I was like, ‘Sh-t, it’s way cooler being Darth Vader than it is being Luke Skywalker.’”

Louis CK accused him of joke-stealing in 2005: Louis C.K. publicly accused Cook of lifting material from his 2001 album, Live in Houston. Cook categorically denied the charges and wrote a letter to C.K. asking him to stop bad-mouthing him, which C.K. ignored. “I think he knew that he could be more popular talking about why I shouldn’t be popular,” Cook says, offering his theory for why C.K. made the accusations. “It helped him, it really did. It was like he was on a press tour because of it.”

What he thinks of the accusations against Louis CK now: The comic had tried to repair relations with C.K., appearing as himself on C.K.’s FX show in 2011, but the results had been mixed. “I wanted a couple of things tweaked [in C.K.'s script],” Cook says. “But he was not going to change anything. It was what it was.” Still, when reporters called Cook in 2017 looking to see if he wanted to dish out any payback [to CK], he kept quiet. “People were like, ‘What do you think about this guy?’” he says. “But I didn’t speak out. All I can say is that nothing Louis did to me is anywhere near what happened between him and those women. Yeah, it sucked what happened to me, but I knew what I did and didn’t do.” That said, Cook does twist the knife some with a C.K./karma joke in his current arsenal — a quip that got one of the biggest reactions during his Laugh Factory set.

His 20-year-old girlfriend: “We laugh a lot about it. We’re not afraid to goof on [that perception]. But I have never had somebody in my life who is so kind and caring. I hope it goes the distance.”

[From The Hollywood Reporter]

“All I can say is that nothing Louis did to me is anywhere near what happened between him and those women.” He came so close to actually saying something meaningful here, I wonder why he didn’t? He could have said, “Yeah, what happened between Louis and I was awful, but it’s not as awful as using his power and authority to sexually harass multiple women and attempt to derail their careers if they spoke out.” I get the feeling that Dane’s bro-outlook is still on full display, but whatever. Just don’t abuse women, and just don’t be a raging a–hole, let’s start there. If Dane can manage that, then so be it. Let him have his comeback.

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6 Responses to “Dane Cook: ‘It’s way cooler being Darth Vader than it is being Luke Skywalker’”

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  1. Annika says:

    Not interested.

  2. Fluffy Princess says:

    Dane Cook always resides in the “Ewww, that guy!” Column.

    BUT, I will say this comment: “All I can say is that nothing Louis did to me is anywhere near what happened between him and those women.” Completely took me surprise, and I will give him credit where credit is due.

    His relationship is still gross though. And he needs to lay off the weird eyebrow botox. OR he can get a girlfriend closer to his age and he can stop the botox and look his age–imagine that.

  3. Alissa says:

    I heavy sighed when I read the headline, which is I think how I feel about Dane Cook.

  4. Ann says:

    I thought Dane Cook was funny back in the day. I was in college when he was really popular and all my friends liked him too. I think it’s weird that he has a girlfriend young enough to be his daughter but the man still makes me laugh, which is the point given that he’s a comedian. If this comeback goes well I hope he’s on Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee with Jerry Seinfeld. I know that might be bad optics because both men have a history with very young women but I think it’d be a really funny episode. Louis CK’s episode was not funny to me but I don’t think Louis CK is funny so there you go.

  5. Carol says:

    That guy makes 5 year olds seem like mature adults.

    Cook’s maturity level has been Benjamin Buttoned.

  6. notafan says:

    Who would have thought that of all people, *Dane Cook* was NOT the a-hole?