Duchess Kate will ‘name’ a boat next week, only the name isn’t Boaty McBoatface

Princess Charlotte is spotted on her first day of School in London!

Did you see that some media outlets are trying to make a pregnancy storyline happen with the Duchess of Cambridge this week? I would be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about that already – this is usually the time of year when Kate traditionally announces her pregnancies (early). But I don’t think she’s pregnant yet. You know why? Because her first trimester is usually the hardest on her, and that’s when she’s the sickest and barfiest, and Kate has – so far – shown no signs of that. If she suddenly cancels some events, then we’ll know. Of course, to cancel some events, she’d first have to add events to her schedule, and despite all of the stories pushing the neverending keenness, Kate’s fall schedule seems kind of light at the moment. F–k it, maybe she is knocked up already. No, I jest! William and Kate did add something to their schedule… for the 26th.

Duchess Kate and Prince William have already had a busy start to September. Just a few weeks ago, they both brought Princess Charlotte to her first day of school at Thomas’s Battersea, accompanied by her older brother Prince George. The Prince of Cambridge has been a student since 2017. Prior to that joint outing, we last saw William and Kate together at their inaugural King’s Cup regatta in early August. Now, the two have announced their first joint outing of the fall, and it’s taking place next week!

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge will visit Birkenhead on Sept. 26, where they will officially name the RRS Sir David Attenborough, the new UK polar research ship. The couple will be joined by the ship’s namesake, the legendary broadcaster and naturalist Sir David Attenborough, who will make a speech along with the duke and duchess. Kate has the honour of formally naming the ship, which will have the traditional ceremony that includes smashing a bottle of champagne against its hull. You might remember that in 2016, the Natural Environment Research Council (NERC) asked the public to help name the boat that eventually became RRS Sir David Attenborough. The first place finisher in that poll was Boaty McBoatface, which will obviously not be the name of the boat, but will be the name of a remotely controlled submersive vehicle that will be kept on board the RRS Sir David Attenborough.

[From Hello Magazine]

Personally, I’m still BEYOND pissed that the boat wasn’t named Boaty McBoatface. The NERC held a public poll on what to name the vessel and the people overwhelmingly chose Boaty McBoatface. That name is truly the People’s Choice. But no, all of the scientists were like “we could never name a boat something funny and democratic!!” Fascist nerds. I hope Kate does something to protest the name! “I refuse to smash the champagne bottle unless you name this vessel BOATY!” McBoatface Folk Hero Kate!

In addition to that, People Magazine gave Kate another gold star and lavish praise because Kate… sat through a three-hour meeting about feelings at her kids’ school. The way People frames the story, it’s like we’re supposed to think it’s so interesting and Kate is so eager and keen, when really… it’s a story about how a fancy private school forced parents to sit through a three-hour meeting with a hippie.

Princess Charlotte is spotted on her first day of School in London!

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red and Backgrid.

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80 Responses to “Duchess Kate will ‘name’ a boat next week, only the name isn’t Boaty McBoatface”

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  1. Rapunzel says:

    They should name the boat “The Kate Middleton Success Story”

  2. Harla says:

    Queue the nautical themed coat dress or sailor pants.

  3. Busyann says:

    When will Meghan’s next events be announced so that we can thank Kate in advance?

  4. JAC says:

    Eh, she’s as useless as the rest of them. I would think bringing another child into the world taxpayers have to pay for would be a bit much, no?

    Ona different note, she does look the best she’s ever looked. The shorter hair really suits her, makes her look quite a lot younger than 37.

    • DaisySharp says:

      I cannot believe they would dare have a 4th child. I mean, that is just ridiculous I’m sorry.

      • Kittycat says:

        Kate and William want attention without working to hard.

        So I can see the having a fourth child.

        Plus it would mirror the Queen by having four kids.

      • JAC says:

        The danish royals also have 4 if I’m not mistaken, but at least they have twins.

      • L84Tea says:

        Not to mention the Danish Royals work their tushies off…

      • CuriousCole says:

        The optics would be bad if they went for another child, but when have they ever cared or even understood optics? That being said, I will say that the Cambridge kids really only have each other for absolute support and empathy within the gilded fishbowl they’ve been born. I can understand wanting to expand the nuclear support system in such a situation. Complete strangers feel ownership over these kids and each generation faces unique levels of intrusion. So from that angle -only- I wouldn’t begrudge them a fourth baby.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        The Crown Princess of Denmark had twins with one of her pregnancies.

      • notasugarhere says:

        The Belgians also have four.

    • Jadedone says:

      She is useless but let’s be honest it’s not like Harry is so hard working either. I mean if we are looking at last years public engagements it doesnt look good for Kate, Will or Harry. I know this is a Harry positive website but let’s be honest, all the young Royals are pretty useless and lack any concept on what real work is. I mean 200 working events in a year is not full time work for the rest of us peasants

      • bonobochick says:

        Both sides!!


      • VS says:

        You seem unable to understand quality vs quantity. IMO there are four types of royals
        1) those who do a lot of engagements, “a la” Princess Anne for instance
        2) those who do projects, “a la” prince Harry
        3) those who do 1) and 2), this is Prince Charles
        4) those who do next to nothing; to be nice I will put prince Andrew

        In terms of impact, 2) will always have more meaningful impact than 1);l No matter what! I see that you left Meghan out of your list; that’s funny but you had to include one of the Sussexes to prove your point.

        There are those who can do 2) because they can. There are those who should do 1) because they cannot do 2); I think Kate should do more of the 1)

        William should be in 3) but…………

      • Elisa says:

        ITA with Jadedone. And calling these events “work” is an insult to people who actually work.

      • Jadedone says:

        @VS as you said, that’s your opinion, I happen to disagree. I did not include Meghan bc she was not a full time working Royal until May of last year so it wouldn’t be fair to include her. The reality is that Charles does more work then his two sons combined which is not acceptable to me. They live super privileged lives and work minimally, we should all be outraged by their lack of work ethic. Kate, Will and Harry all need to up their game bc they all look lazy, they look like entitled rich kids who want all the privillege of being in the Royal family but dont want to do the work that goes along with it. #abolishthemonarchy

      • himmiefan says:

        I’ve read that Anne is super-prepared for her engagements and stays quite a while talking to people. So, I’d say she has numbers and quality.

      • Nic919 says:

        Obviously Andrew is a horrible human, but his engagement numbers tend to be fairly high and usually more than Edward and Sophie.

    • notasugarhere says:

      You do understand these photos of the school dropoff are seriously photoshopped, right?

  5. Seraphina says:

    I vote for either: chutneymaker or Keen-I-am

  6. portobadisco11 says:

    The first line is the most eyerolling. Busiest September with taking their children to school? My goodness

    • ShazBot says:

      What in the actual eff is this??
      “Duchess Kate and Prince William have already had a busy start to September. Just a few weeks ago, they both brought Princess Charlotte to her first day of school at Thomas’s Battersea, accompanied by her older brother Prince George. The Prince of Cambridge has been a student since 2017. Prior to that joint outing, we last saw William and Kate together at their inaugural King’s Cup regatta in early August. Now, the two have announced their first joint outing of the fall, and it’s taking place next week!”

      If that’s a busy start, my September has been a productivity mad house.

      • VS says:

        That’s a lot; usually instead of those 3 events, they do only 2. So from 2 to 3, means busy September……..

      • Tourmaline says:

        Seriously, that line had me practically screaming! “Just a few weeks ago, they brought their kids to school!” OMG how exhausting and productive of them!

    • Silas says:

      Charlotte and George have had busier Septembers than their parents with being expected to show up to school every weekday.

      William has actually done a little more so he’s being lumped in with his wife’s laziness.

    • The Hench says:

      Yes seriously. I was shouting at my screen reading that. A busy September doing ONE thing that took less than a morning. FFS.

    • Algernon says:

      The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have had a busy September! They took their kids to school once! And the month before they did boats! So busy!

    • Mrs.Krabapple says:

      Don’t forget, Kate is also mentoring Meghan, is probably raising Archie, and is doing all of Meghan’s work in addition to her own, so that must keep Kate pretty busy.

  7. DaisySharp says:

    Um, to me a 3 hour “meeting’ (it’s a lecture) is torture, and I will give her props for sitting through it. I would not do it. I find it both physically and emotionally painful, absolutely truthful.

    • Silas says:

      Kate spends more time at the hairdresser. I’m sure she was fine.

    • VS says:

      That hair alone took her more than 3 hours; so a 3-hour meeting is torture? have you ever worked in a corporation? should those people give each other prop for sitting through meetings?

  8. Noodle says:

    For once, I feel a bit bad for Kate. David Attenborough will be there as the honored guest after whom the ship is named and will speak, and then W & K will also speak. Can you imagine having to speak alongside the legendary David Attenborough and being expected to say something meaningful? I speak publicly some for my work and do a fine job, but I would have such major anxiety if I were in her shoes.

    • Kittycat says:

      The bar is low for Kate.

      • JAC says:

        As someone who struggles with public speaking, I’ll give her a pass on that. If she’s like me just standing there and not passing out is an achievement. So the bar may be low, but the tiny improvements we see might be monumental for her

      • Bella DuPont says:

        @ JAC

        I once saw a short video ofa young Kate, at school, on stage, acting…..and doing a fine job of it.

        I suspect her current stage fright is more about her worrying about her accent and maybe people spotting cracks in it? I genuinely think if she just let go of worrying about it, she would actually be fine.

      • Erinn says:

        “I once saw a short video of a young Kate, at school, on stage, acting…..and doing a fine job of it.”

        I mean, I did public speaking from 8 – 20. During the early years I did better than I did as a teenager. Something just clicked in my head and it went from being something that would make me vaguely nervous but that I could do competently (I won some competitions) to me shaking like a leaf trying to recite my speech. So it’s possible that she got worse like I did.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Harry has admitted serious anxiety when he speaks, but he still does pretty well with his speeches. Kate has had eight years since the engagement announcement to get all the professional help she wants, paid by the taxpayers. She chooses to be this bad.

    • Lady D says:

      I don’t have a problem with public speaking either, but speaking after Sir David would be intimidating.

    • Deedee says:

      A good speaker would use that. That’s where you say something self-deprecating about having to follow such a wonderful speaker and you endear yourself to everyone. But I’m sure we’ll get the same hair flicking, stopping in the wrong places while reading from a script she’s never even perused and speaking in the weird posh accent she usually delivers.

  9. Trillian says:

    Funny how they won’t name the boat that but the Brexit poll is of course legit and binding.

  10. AprilMay says:

    Imagine trying to make it seem like Kate’s busy. She did one thing at he start of august l- from which they still haven’t announced an amount raised- dropped her daughter to school visited a garden and will name a boat. And honestly writing that that’s a busy start to the autumn. I mean really!! Charles does more than this in one day.

  11. RoyalBlue says:

    They have already had a busy start to September? Tell me that Hello Magazine wrote that tongue-in-cheek, because surely they jest. These two bore me.

    • Becks1 says:

      I love that so many of us are fixated on that part of it, LOL.

      • RoyalBlue says:

        We’ve got skills! Nothing gets past us. We pay close attention to important details to cross examine the witness. They won’t get away with writing nonsense. 🙂

  12. Becks1 says:

    They have had a busy start to September because Charlotte started school? And she did a garden event last week? AYFKM with this? She will do three events in one month that’s “busy”?

    Nice work if you can get, I guess….

  13. bonobochick says:

    I am laughing that the article reads how they have had a busy start to September by then stating they went to Charlotte’s first day of school weeks ago. Wow, that is BUSY!

    Seriously… what a joke. Busy finally doing work on the 26th? Oh and that one meeting announced the day before the Smart Set Collection launched and the garden thing one day.

    I don’t know how Wills and Kate have all that energy with such a busy schedule, esp with Kate fresh off she & Meghan’s joint maternity leave. 😏

  14. My3cents says:

    How about Rose Hanbury?
    Then she could vent a little passive aggressive towards her….

  15. Digital Unicorn says:

    I can hear Kate now saying ‘I hearby christen this boat The Wiglet’s Curl, god bless all who sail in her’.

  16. Original Jenns says:

    1. “it’s a story about how a fancy private school forced parents to sit through a three-hour meeting with a hippie.” Dead at that perfect description.
    2. I’m still mad Boaty McBoat Face was not given its proper due. I will give Kate or William credit if they mention it in their speeches!
    3. The boat names on here are far better than anything else.

  17. Jen says:

    “Busy start to fall” by taking their kids to school, naming a boat, and announcing one outing… okay then.

  18. Juliastr says:

    Perfect job for Kate. She is very limited in what she can contribute so this engagement matches her limited skill set.

    • christy says:

      I would argue that it’s more to do with a lack of work ethic and desire and willingness to make a meaningful contribution v.s. ability…
      Polar opposite of Meghan who wants to work and contribute and is actually enthusiastic about her causes v.s. going through the motions

    • VS says:

      I agree here……I think she should try to do what Princess Anne does; she is not set to do the projects; she does not seem to have the interest……she should instead do lots of the bread and butter engagements imo

      • Becks1 says:

        @VS – I agree. I am not an “ideas” person. Meghan and Harry clearly are. And they are willing to put in the work to make those ideas happen (i.e. Harry didn’t just come up with Invictus Games, attend the first one and then peace out, he has made sure they happen repeatedly, he attends them, promotes them, etc. It will be something he is known for years down the road.) And I think Meghan’s strength is clearly more tangible projects that she can accomplish in about a year, but that can have a lasting impact. My guess is when we look back at her work in 10, 20 years, we will see a string of projects like the cookbook, Smart Set collection, etc.

        And that’s great! But not everyone can do that and that’s okay too. Kate doesn’t have to be trying to come up with the next cookbook or whatever. She can just do the bread and butter engagements like Anne (who does also travel internationally for the RF), and churn those out. Heck she could do a lot of them in Norfolk or London and be home when the kids get out of school.

        But instead she drops the kids off at school, visits a garden, and names a boat. For one month.

      • Sofia says:

        Completely agree with the both of you. More of these bread and butter engagements are good for Kate as long as she actually puts in similar numbers to Anne. That way on paper when she’s done 200+ engagements it looks good.

      • Tourmaline says:

        But it is William and Kate’s express plan to NOT do a lot of bread and butter engagements. I swear this was reported somewhere back in the day, around the time of their marriage: that the plan was to do very few engagements that would pack more punch–that the relative rarity of their appearances would make them more valuable.

        Coincidentally that also means they have much more free time/leisure time/time to live their “private lives” which is what they want.

        That’s why I LOL whenever anyone wrings hands over who is going to do all those workaday appearances when the current elder set of royals are gone. The answer is NO ONE! Those types of events will be a thing of the past.

      • Jen says:

        They say that’s their plan, but they’ve also said they weren’t doing more because they’re newly married, they weren’t doing more because they aren’t the PoWs yet, they aren’t doing more because Kate is pregnant, they aren’t doing more because Kate had a baby.

        It all boils down to basically that they do nothing and get excused for it.

      • Nic919 says:

        Yes they did say they would focus on more impactful things instead of the bread and butter. The problem is that eight years later they have not done any impactful long term projects. Heads Together was supposed to be that, but it has been dropped recently. The gardens are not it either.

        Things like Invictus Games or Sentebale would be the types of ongoing long term projects that William and Kate mean to do but just haven’t bothered to do yet.

  19. Le4Frimaire says:

    Boaty McBoatface is the first thing I thought about. That guy who came up with that got a real job with a major cruise company out of that. This kind of event is in Kate’s wheelhouse. Show up, shake hands, smile and smash a bottle of champagne. Endless articles for days.

  20. aquarius64 says:

    I would like to see the Cambridges stand and deliver when they visit Pakistan. That country is a hot spot and no amount of keenness will correct that.

    • I’ve got to ask … stand and deliver what exactly? We agree that Pakistan is a hot spot but what exactly are they supposed to deliver ? Peace in the Middle East? Equality for women?
      Photo ops? Fashion commentary ( which we are all going to pick apart regardless )?
      A speech ( which will also be panned).

      It’s likely that , being from the US, I have no clue what the purpose of these tours are. The Australia thing, ok Commonwealth etc but as fun as it was for us watching, what do they deliver in tangible terms?

  21. Rogue says:

    it’s same reason a First Lady will do solo tours-using soft power to build relationships for trade etc. Britain needs new trade deals post Brexit& royal family are the shiny faces of that whilst the diplomats and politicians consolidate those relationships behind the scenes. Right now headlines are about post EU free movement trade deal with Australia, country the Sussexes visited last year. Some of the countries in the Southern Africa tour have recently agreed trade terms with Britain and Angola, country Harry will visit, is said to be thinking of joining the Commonwealth.

  22. Sass says:

    “Fascist nerds.” 😂