Angelina Jolie’s message to girls: ‘Find their own power, but respect & learn from men’

Maleficent: Mistress of Evil European Premiere at BFI IMAX, London

Angelina Jolie and Disney are on the same page for Maleficent: Mistress of Evil. Disney seems to love this collaboration because Angelina goes all-in to sell the movies, and because she can talk about feminism while still staying on Disney-message. Disney’s feminism is definitely on the lighter, more consumer-driven side. I mean, little kids still want to be princesses, but maybe they also want to have horns and wings and wear all-black. Disney is giving them that choice = feminism. I have a point here! The point is that I love how Angelina and Elle Fanning put their own spin on Disney’s feminist-lite talking points:

Angelina Jolie has championed the role men can play in shaping the personalities of young girls. The actress, who stars in Maleficent: Mistress of Evil, also said female characters in films should not have to be portrayed as physically tough in order to be considered strong.

“I think that, so often, when a story’s told which says ‘this is a strong woman’, she has to beat the man, or she has to be like the man, or she has to somehow not need the man,” Jolie told journalists at the film’s launch.

Referring to her own character in the film and Princess Aurora, played by Elle Fanning, Jolie said: “We both very much need and love and learn from the men. And so I think that’s also an important message for young girls, to find their own power, but to respect and learn from the men around them. We have strong women, but the character that is wrong in the film and has to be taken out is also a woman. We show very diverse types of women between our characters, but also we have extraordinary men in the film, and I really want to press that point.”

Fanning, who reprises her role of Princess Aurora in the film, echoed Jolie’s comments and said her character’s strength is not necessarily physical, unlike many princesses in children’s films.

“Aurora’s strength is her kindness, and she stays very true to herself, which is something I wanted to keep in the film. She is soft and feminine and wants to be a wife and have babies, and that’s a beautiful, strong thing that isn’t portrayed a lot on screen. A lot of the princesses are like ‘we’re gonna make her a strong princess! And make her tough, so we’re gonna make her fight!’ And it’s like, is that what being a strong woman means? Like, we just have to have a sword and have armour on and go fight? Aurora can do that in a different way, in a pink dress, and it’s beautiful that she keeps her softness and vulnerabilities.”

[From BBC]

“She is soft and feminine and wants to be a wife and have babies, and that’s a beautiful, strong thing that isn’t portrayed a lot on screen.” Can we argue about this? Almost every romance and rom-com is based on the idea that yes, every woman wants a husband, a wedding and babies. Every magazine and every message from the media is that women want those things too. It’s not groundbreaking to portray a young woman wanting those things. It’s not feminist or anti-feminist either (it’s just a neutral choice). That quote is from Elle and I think she’s just trying to defend her character. But this quote from Angelina was just too much as well: “That’s also an important message for young girls, to find their own power, but to respect and learn from the men around them…” Yeah but when are boys going to get the message to respect and learn from the women around them. Ugh.

Maleficent: Mistress of Evil European Premiere at BFI IMAX, London

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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100 Responses to “Angelina Jolie’s message to girls: ‘Find their own power, but respect & learn from men’”

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  1. Sarah says:

    I fully support the message that feminism includes men. Young boys (including my own son) are growing up now thinking “Girls are Best”. The pendulum needs to find its centre, and it will. But neither gender should suffer in the process.

    • Devon says:

      Very strong statement !

    • MrsBanjo says:

      +1

    • Aims says:

      Amen! I also have boys and they have been taught not only with us speaking to them, but also by example, that women are their own boss. I have taught them that nobody owns anyone, that we are independent and we don’t need permission for anything. It’s troubling too me that movies show young girls that their self worth and their whole identity has to dependent of a man. If a woman decided to get married and have babies, that is HER choice, as is being single and childless. She determines what is right for her and she doesn’t have to apologize or defend herself to anyone. Women, you don’t have to follow any path other then your own. You are your boss!!!!

    • Rhys says:

      Oh, please, Sarah. We are so far in today’s world from girls and women being “best” in comparison to men, that your fear for your sons is unwarranted in that sense. This is a men’s world by far. Your boys are going to be just fine.

      • otaku fairy.... says:

        You’re right.

      • Lulu2 says:

        Thank you Rhys… I’m a woman business owner and grew up in the late 80s early 90s. Not much had changed for women. And as mom of 2 boys and 2 daughters, I can see not much has changed for them either. I’m constantly preaching to my sons because their schools/teachers/coaches etc let them get away with SO much. And girls still have unrealistic expectations placed on their heads that new age feminism perpetuates. Bottom line, the message is still “be this way so MEN will respect you and want to marry you” while very few are telling young boys “how will you be able to gain a woman’s respect and get a wife acting like that?”. It is very much still a man’s world.

      • detritus says:

        I spoke with a bunch of other feminist women recently at a conference, and the thing that got me?
        My friend, who lived through the Berlin Wall falling, who has been a feminist for more decades than I’ve been alive said – nothing has changed, or its changed so barely it hurts my soul. We are still fighting for the same things, for the same respect, the same place at the table.

        When most politicians and world leaders are male, when most of the scions of business, the pundits and powerful elite, when almost all of them are men you cannot in good faith argue the message of ‘girls are best’ has in any way taken root. Many of us were taught the opposite, that men are best, that women who act like men are better than regular women. That is STILL being taught, by the president, by our media, by our very self sustaining culture.

        Perhaps it’s time to change methods. No power gives that power up, even in portion, willingly. When I see people whine like Sarah, it reminds me that some change is happening. There are always canaries for changes in the status quo.

      • Sarah says:

        How dare you say I was “whining”? That’s outrageous. I was speaking as a HARD-CORE feminist, that my very own teachings and the female-first promotion at his school and in our (admittedly liberal) community, have had a detrimental effect on my own son. I think that is worthy of dialogue. I’m sorry you are so closed-minded.

      • Dannii says:

        Right on Rhys!

      • Désirée says:

        Sarah, if you are preaching “girls are best” and if your school and community really have a “female-first promotion” politics, then either none of you are “hard-core feminists” (“women are better than men” IS NOT FEMINISM), either you lot are delusional and it’s very concerning.

    • Courtney says:

      WTH? My only child is a boy and I couldn’t disagree with you more.

    • Sonia says:

      What planet do you live on Sarah? One where Fox News is the only channel on tv? The president of the United States has been accused of sexually assaulting 20+ women and is different no consequences and you think boys are being taught “girls are best”? Holy f’n he’ll.

      Oh, you wrote “Centre” so I’ll just change that to any Rupert Murdoch-owned media.

      • Sarah says:

        I don’t live in the US — what planet do YOU live on where the US is the be-all-and end-all?

      • A says:

        @Sarah, do point out where else in the world that “girls are best” is something that…literally ANYONE thinks in any functional capacity? Like, you have to be a special type of delusional to genuinely think this, sorry.

    • jenner says:

      I’m a little confused by this. Yes, feminism includes men. And yes, there is a lot of man-hating going on in the world. I see it in the comments in this site and it often seems that people do not have sons, brothers or fathers that they love. But saying “girls are best” is not better or equal than saying “boys are best”. It’s the same thing and it reinforces inequality.

    • Jb says:

      Agreed I don’t see the problem with bringing men into the conversation as allies. Girl power boy power can work jointly and remembering ultimately mutual respect is key.

    • R says:

      Hahahahahahaha….nope

    • coolspray says:

      I’m confused at everyone jumping down @Sarah’s throat and saying “WTF” and “You live in Fox News land” – she is recounting her own, and her own son’s experience, who’s to say her view is wrong based on their experiences and what her son has been exposed to?

      Personally I think the strongest messaging needs to come in the home, and both parents (whatever gender combination, and assuming more than one parent involved) need to be onside and consistent. IMO, especially important with parents of different genders since if the female is saying one thing and the male another, that is very confusing to kids.

    • Lisa says:

      totally, and this from a mother of 3 boys! Argh. I am a toughie, and I am scared for my boys.

    • Joanna says:

      I understand what you are saying. I think the reason why people are jumping on you is because your experience is unusual for most of us. I’m a liberal in a strong conservative area. We don’t have girls are best programs. We have the boys will be boys and girls better watch what they wear or they’ll be raped mindsets here. You did nothing wrong and you shouldn’t have been jumped on like you were.

    • Melanie says:

      Sarah, I don’t believe you LOL. I have never heard a reaction like this from a “HARD-CORE” feminist. You sound like an MRA trolling.

      • Oui oki says:

        Melanie if it sounds like that to you (and many here) i suggest you all google things like how sexism/ toxic masculinity hurts boys and men. It’s actually a thing that many people are aware of. I know a wonderful kind progressive queer woman who did her thesis on this. Let’s not ignore this issue, maybe we can stop some boys from turning into violent men

    • lara (the other) says:

      @Sarah
      I belive you. I have seen it with my nephew who went to a private kindergarten in a liberal urban surrounding and was told only girls were supposed to play with trucks and technical toys and dolls and and cooking is for boys.
      And I don’t think, this is the right way to work against the patriarchy.
      But I also think this only happens in very small, rich and extremely “liberal” pockets and the norm is still boys will be boys and girls should be nice.

      • Godwina says:

        “I have seen it with my nephew who went to a private kindergarten in a liberal urban surrounding and was told only girls were supposed to play with trucks and technical toys and dolls and and cooking is for boys.”

        OMG my BS metre just pinged. LOUDLY.

    • Dannii says:

      Sarah you have some seriously messed up arguments, you need to check your ego.

    • Oy vey says:

      I agree whole heartledly. Especially because I have a son who is a young man. Problem for me is walking the walk. I’m good at letting him be a man and being respectful of that while teaching him important lessons about my experience as a woman and teaching him how we feel and what we need as far as respect goes. All this while in my mind being annoyed by men not being able to contribute on the level that we do as women and thinking it is unfair that they don’t work as hard as we do…sorry. I hope this doesn’t piss anyone off. It’s just my experience and I won’t have one in my house after divorce – meaning I’d rather not have a boyfriend or husband. They bug the shit outa me.

  2. DaisySharp1 says:

    It’s very difficult to be a feminist, to live a feminist life. If you are honest about your views and values. The things both Jolie and Fanning say here are the things you must express if you wish to be viewed as desirable by the most men. I’ve never been able to say these things, and I have never felt them, and it’s caused me problems, but I have been pleased enough to deal with those problems. But of my closest friends, they were also happy enough to gather the benefits of my behavior. Enough said.

    Edited to add – reading some of the first comments, it’s a shame we can’t run a test like they do to catch landlords employing discrimination via a simple name change. In this case, what would the comments be if this story ran exactly as is, but change the names to taylor swift and jen aniston.

    • Sierra says:

      To be frank both Taylor & Jennifer are mean girls to me. They have their girl groups and women outside of that aren’t included or dismissed.

      But I also agree that they are strong, intelligent & independent women. They would not have survived & succeed in a male dominated profession if they weren’t.

  3. Sierra says:

    I actually agree and get where Angelina is coming from.

    It’s like the modern feminists wants to rule the world by destroying men, all men are bad etc. I am surrounded by true men who support me and other women in the family completely. I know there are millions of more men who are the same way.

    Most of us true feminists want equal rights and not full take over. Most of us are fighting to give women and girls right to decide over their body, education and career.

    I know I will be attacked for this but to me, feminism doesn’t equal total alienation of men.

    • Sunshine says:

      @Sierra…Not sure what you are talking about when you say “modern feminists.” It’s actually the old school ones that were single minded and non inclusive of anyone not like them. This is why so many minorities and working class people refuse to identify as feminists. Today’s feminists of which Angelina is one is more about intersection and inclusive of men. Just listen to the DoS speech on international women’s day panel…she effectively said the exact same thing.

      • Sierra says:

        Thanks I will definitely listen to the speech you mentioned.

        Unfortunately I am surrounded by feminists who feel it’s their turn to take over. Hence the modern feminism sentence.

        But I stand corrected and thank you for not insulting me and instead reply in a respectful manner.

    • Gingerbread says:

      Give me a break. Modern feminists do not want to destroy men. That’s a myth. And save me with the “I know I’ll be attacked by stating the true definition of feminism but pretend that other women don’t feel the same way”.

      • DaisySharp1 says:

        Thank you Gingerbread.

      • Sierra says:

        Next time, when you attack someone for something, don’t twist their words to suit your argument.

        I clearly stated it was my opinion nor am I claiming others don’t support the same thing.

        I have seen several commentators disagreeing with people, hence the sentence about me being attacked. You are example number 1.

      • Gingerbread says:

        You’re not being attack. I didn’t insult you, or call you names. You clearly stated that you thought you’d be attacked by actually stating the definition of feminism, which means you don’t believe other women feel the same. Which you backed up by stating modern day feminists want to DESTROY men. It was an absurd statement, and I can call you out on it without attacking you.

      • Sierra says:

        Well I felt you were being condescending but sorry if that was not the case. If my comment was wrong then I take full responsibility. Sorry if I offended you.

        I like CB because we see women from different countries and cultures debating in a healthy way.

      • coolspray says:

        Wow @ Gingerbread. That was RUDE.

      • Sarah says:

        So rude! This topic brings the B out!

    • Joanna says:

      No it doesn’t equal alienation of men. I’m a happily married feminist. People that don’t like feminists are judging feminists by the few extremes. But many times men alienate themselves from feminists because they can’t handle strong women or women that directly ask for what they want. I worked at a used car lot for 6 years and many of the men seemed more comfortable with the women who flirted or played coy games to get what they wanted. Women who went directly for what they wanted and competed head to head w men for what they wanted were not liked. The men’s ego could not handle a woman acting like a man. They much preferred women who did not challenge them. That’s the flaw in that man, not the strong woman. You are thinking of men who can’t handle a strong woman. That’s their problem not the feminists’ problem. And every woman is a feminist if she believes in equal rights. Period.

    • jenner says:

      @Sierra- so well said.

    • coolspray says:

      I think people confuse the different waves of feminism and their minds immediately go to second wave feminism (stereotypical example would be bra burning protests). Third wave feminism and fourth wave feminism are different. Fourth wave does currently focus on female empowerment over promotion of gender equality, and I think messaging of female empowerment can (or is interpreted as) hating men, putting them down, etc. And I do think some take it too far. It’s all in the details. Women can clearly be empowered without saying they are “better” or superior to men. Maybe the pendulum needs to swing that way first to then rebalance things?

  4. Arizona says:

    I completely agree with what she’s saying about there being different ways of women being strong. since the big push to have strong women, it often means physically strong or like a dude, and I rarely see women like myself or my friends represented. it seems to be either all you want is love and babies, or all you want is to kick ass and be one of the guys. there’s so much in the middle of that isn’t being represented.

    (obviously there are examples of movies that do represent that, but it’s criminally low in my opinion)

  5. SM says:

    I think that what Elle was getting at is that the representation is not very nuanced. A lot of ballsy, strong women want a family, a loving partner and kids. The one does not negate the other. Look as the hero of the week- the only human who stood up to the bully in a WH in the room full of men was a woman who is married and has kids. In stories we tell and in public narrative as well focus on either being a ball busting superhuman or a woman who just wants kids and a husband. This is the problem with rom coms they never combine the two.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      Yeah, that’s what I got as well – though I think that she could have formulated her thoughts better. The problem with media is that depictions of women who are strong almost always are confined to one type: a woman who is a physical fighter, i.e. Strong Woman Character TM. There’s nothing wrong with that but the problem is that this type of character, which originally was introduced to create diversity has been co-opted by patriarchal thinking as the ONLY type of worthwhile female character because her warrior-like qualities are traditionally masculine coded characteristics. Sadly, this is an attitude that a lot of women has espoused.

      I love watching women kick ass on the screen and on the page but we shouldn’t close our eyes to female characters who use their wit and social skills to effect change or female characters who survive abuse without loosing their kindness. These kind of characters are not are weak but strong in ways different from simply being able to kick ass. There are different kinds of strength. Physical fighting skills are a strength but so is intellect, endurance and kindness/empathy and we shouldn’t overlook these. Women warrior types in fiction function as power fantasies and as such they are very seductive and there’s a place for such power fantasies – but we shouldn’t overlook different kinds of female strength.

    • otaku fairy.... says:

      Right. There are times when women are going to enjoy and express themselves in a more feminine way, are going to show softness and vulnerability, and he kind and empathetic. Then there are times when the protective, kickass side of women are going to come out too, assertiveness is called for, or a woman just might enjoy or express herself in a way that’s more traditionally masculine. Sometimes a combination of those things will blend in some way too. I actually don’t think kindness/vulnerability/compassion and protectiveness/assertiveness/anger always function on opposite ends of a spectrum; in this life, we see our sisters, mothers, cousins, grandmothers, aunts, friends, girlfriends, peers, and others to through so much.

      Supporting both the ‘freedom from’ and the ‘freedom to’ is important when it comes to some of these issues. A woman shouldn’t have to perform a level of femininity that she doesn’t want and should be able to go for things that are considered more androgynous/masculine, (as long as that doesn’t include being misogynistic) but should also not be asked to pretend or perform an inauthentic tomboy routine to be taken seriously or be considered feminist. I also agree that equality can’t happen nationally or globally without both sexes being determined to do their part. In that way, we do need men.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        You’re right that there’s a spectrum and the various qualities blend – a woman can be both vulnerable as well as assertive at times. What I was addressing specifically is a problem that especially plagues the fantasy genre – the idea that the only way a female character can be worthy is to be a warrior who physically kicks ass, which has become a stereotype co-opted by patriarchal thinking, i.e. the Strong Female CharacterTM. To be Badass a woman have to Kick Ass physically (a preferably be sexy at the same time). This is a trend that is thankfully slowly turning – mainly because a lot of female writers have become more prominent in the genre.

        I do think that there’s a place for both “extremes” and I love that action movies like Wonder Woman and Black Panther depict women who are both badass fighters but also caring. However, I do feel that it wasn’t really necessary to make both Nakia and Shuri warriors on top of their other strengths. Nakia’s empathy and moral integrity is her greatest strength and Shuri is a tech genius at 16, which I found to be incredibly badass. I know Black Panther is an action movie but I think it would have been incredibly cool to have prominent strong women who didn’t need to be warriors as well since the movie also has Okoye who is a warrior – bodyguard and general.

        I also think that we need to see more depictions of male characters whose masculinity is of the non-toxic variety.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        Not to mention that the Kickass Strong Female CharacterTM has morphed into the toxic Not Like Other Girls Trope where the kickass heroine is cool because she is the exception to all other girls, which by implication means that all other types of female characters are of less worth.

      • Ali says:

        @arthistorian – +1

  6. HK9 says:

    You know, feminism for me has never been about hating or putting down men. It’s about holding them to account to work through issues, and unfortunately, lots of men still continue to abuse women and girls because they do not respect womanhood on any level. That means you’ve got to have lots of uncomfortable conversations about what is actually going on and what it means if we’re going to get anywhere.

    So, when she says we’ve got to respect men, well I respect myself and men. That’s not a question. My question is why it’s assumed if you’re a strong woman, you don’t respect others like you respect yourself because if you’ve learned to respect yourself, that process requires you to respect others and their space.

    • DaisySharp1 says:

      Right. But what feminist goes around saying girls have to respect and learn from men? First of all, respect is earned, and secondly, learn from them? I guess just generally speaking you can always learn from other human beings, but…this is something else. It strikes me as having a tinge of subservience, and that I know men love, and that game I don’t play. I don’t play.

      • Agenbiter says:

        +1

      • lucy2 says:

        I think it would have been much better had she said “we need to respect and learn from men AND women.” Something about her comment does seem off balanced, especially in this current climate when women are finally feeling able to speak out against all the terrible men who have done terrible things.
        Or maybe something about learning to recognize who the “good” men are and learning from them?

      • Elisa says:

        @DaisySharp1: ITA with everything you are saying on this thread.
        Also: “respect is earned”. So much THIS!

      • Sandii says:

        For me it also sounded like pandering….

      • Lisa says:

        OFFS, pandering? Honestly, you guys just say you dont like her, its that simple. She has been asked questions, she has answered them. Not everyone has to pander to have an opinion of their own! Pssh, in reality you simply cannot please everyone!

      • Joanna says:

        @lisa, I love Angelina! But I don’t like that part.

    • otaku fairy.... says:

      “You know, feminism for me has never been about hating or putting down men. It’s about holding them to account to work through issues, and unfortunately, lots of men still continue to abuse women and girls because they do not respect womanhood on any level. That means you’ve got to have lots of uncomfortable conversations about what is actually going on and what it means if we’re going to get anywhere.”
      Amen. This is why, even though both sexes should respect each other, sometimes girls and women have to be centered. Men and women both are already socialized to respect men more. It shows, and bad things happen to girls and women because of it. That said, Angelina and Elle both made some good, thought-provoking points here. I think Angelina has probably been a positive influence in her life.

  7. Maria says:

    I’m going to quote someone on Twitter that made my day: feminism and hating men are two different things, but I support both!

  8. Leena says:

    Sorry, wrong spot

  9. Rhys says:

    Women have existed in and navigated through the world made exclusively for and by men. The don’t NEED to learn anything from men. If anything, men should ask, learn and practice women’s ways.

  10. Susie Moloney says:

    I imagine that quote would have been received very, very differently if it had been said by, say, Amy Schumer.

  11. Earthbound says:

    This is just …weird. From a young age almost all girls respect and learn from men, as a matter of survival and necessity they have to, that’s who is making yes/no decisions about their lives.
    Only someone raised out in the sticks by some fairytale feminist would need to learn otherwise because they would be living an alternate reality.

    • Rhys says:

      I know, right? When was the last time men actually meant to respect and learn from women, and not just saying it because it sounds… big? Angelina should be telling men to learn from women, not the other way around. At the same time she is not someone I look up to, so she can share her suggestions and I will choose to listen to what Chimamanda Adichie suggests.

  12. DS9 says:

    I don’t think she of all people meant that we needed to respect and listen to what men are saying and think they are teaching us. That’s hella out of step for Angelina both as we’ve always known her and what she’s said on this press tour.

    I do think she means in a more observant and sometimes collaborative way. More like taking lessons from their behavior, good and bad. Nancy handles Trump because she observes Trump. She learns from his own behavior how to handle that ass.

    She’s basically saying watch and learn and use what you learn to get shit done in the way that’s truest to yourself.

    As for what Elle said, I haven’t seen either movie so idk but I felt like she was saying you don’t get both and not usually in a Disney movie. You get Mulan or Cinderella. But I doubt Aurora is both so imma chalk all this up to Elle being very young.

    • SaraR. says:

      Agree. It was, after all, conversation about this movie, she wanted to say that beside those three women characters, there are also strong men characters that support them and collaborate with them.
      And about Aurora, this is what they are trying to put out: that she is soft and feminine but also very strong and the wisest of all three female characters. So I guess she is kinda both Cinderella and Mulan, lol.

    • lucy2 says:

      I’d agree with your assessment more if she’d just said “learn from men”. But she said “respect and learn from”, which takes a different tone, IMO.

  13. 123qwerty says:

    Why does every celeb woman feel the need to explain feminism to everyone? The privileged celebsplaing is so boring.

  14. DR says:

    “I think that, so often, when a story’s told which says ‘this is a strong woman’, she has to beat the man, or she has to be like the man, or she has to somehow not need the man,”

    I’m genuinely curious what movies she’s talking about – she says “so often” but I’m having trouble thinking of examples.

    Female action protagonists who fight & kick ass are actually not super common & make up a fairly small percentage of female roles overall, which is why there’s still a “cultural conversation” and “we can’t let this one underperform or we’ll never get another one” talk whenever one comes out.

    And of course, such characters are always conventionally feminine (right down to not having too many of those icky, “manly” muscles).

    I have no idea what “like a man” is supposed to mean here….but butch/masculine/GNC female characters (for example, Pvt. Vasquez in Aliens) are pretty much non-existent in movies.

    “she has to somehow not need the man” – unless she (rather bizarrely) believes that a female character without a romantic storyline is by default sending the message “I’m a strong woman who doesn’t need a man”, this also doesn’t seem like a very common movie theme (and of course, most female protagonists do have love interests and being a “love interest” is the mainstay of most actresses careers).

    • DR says:

      Oh, and as far as Elle is concerned – I could understand her comments better if they came from actresses who are not typically seen as romantic leads or “eye candy”, such as WOC, older women, fat women, etc.

      But the idea that young, thin, & pretty white women getting to be feminine, marry, & have kids is in any way rare in movies and “isn’t portrayed a lot on screen” is straight up crazy talk.

  15. Courtney says:

    To some people ‘holding men accountable’ is equal to ‘hating men’.

  16. Sarah says:

    There are jerky men and jerky women. There are good men and good women. A lot of it depends how they are raised. Friend influence is a big factor too.

  17. sue denim says:

    I love the point of encouraging men to learn from women too, so important, esp as we see so many women emerging as true leaders these days, doing and saying things too many men have been afraid to.

    Also, I think we need to be clear that it’s often not about men vs women, it’s about the patriarchy. Women can be enmeshed in that and problematic. And men can be great allies. I also think that intensifying this battle right now via the Supreme Court etc is part of the divide and conquer, distract while conning that we really need to fight against. With true power, and feminine wisdom as guides.

  18. laura-j says:

    I think the learning from women was implied.

    I will say when I was OLD and wanted to weed out the lesser men, I put feminist front and center and got exactly zero new matches.

  19. Trashaddict says:

    I’m gonna catch heat for this given the thread of the discussion, BUT:
    wow I really like Angelina’s dress! It’s a warmer pale and fitted and really flatters her. She looks like she’s put on a little good weight and she looks happier. She looks great!
    And yes, all of the above comments. And when I think of powerful mommies, she’s on my list.

  20. Kendra says:

    I’m about three quarters of the way through Ronan Farrow’s book, and this isn’t sitting too well with me. A little tone deaf, I have to say, coming from someone who breathes the rarified air of Hollywood royalty.

    I’m not suggesting Jolie hasn’t paid some dues; I’m sure she has. But making this point while flogging her latest movie makes it difficult to remove from the context of the Hollywood story-telling machine – and we’re all extremely well-versed by now in what it means for women to “respect” the men they work with and for, especially in entertainment.

    It’s nice (I guess?) that she feels that way, but the message is lost in the shadow cast by the platform from which she expresses it. Which is that she makes a lot of money working in a business that thinks swapping out George Clooney for Sandra Bullock in a half-a**ed “Oceans” retread makes it some sort of feminist manifesto. It’s fake feminism, and I’m sick of it all.

  21. A.Key says:

    Intelligent, good people come in all shapes, sizes and genders. If you’re smart enough you’ll learn from them and respect them. I respect all people, I don’t care what they look like or what genitals they have.