Celebrities going to jail is so rare that when one does, the public dines on it for as long as they can. Many times, their prison time is mentioned any time their name is brought up. Felicity Huffman has just joined the Celebrity Chain Gang and was recently photographed walking the yard in the latest from the Federal Correctional Institution Dublin’s fall line:
Felicity Huffman for New Balance-“no matter where you are New Balance will make you feel free” pic.twitter.com/brpcL6uumt
— Ryan Kardashian Jenner (@ryanbailey25) October 19, 2019
Of course, Felicity isn’t the only celebrity alive having done time, Martha Stewart went to prison for lying to investigators in 2004. So naturally, when Martha was a panelist at the Vanity Fair’s New Establishment Summit as a businesswoman discussing the future of cooking, the host of her segment decided to bring up her prison sentence and whether she had advice for the newly incarcerated Felicity. But Martha, who doesn’t suffer fools lightly, gave a surprising answer. She suggested that Felicity tidy up her prison apparel as she looks “schlumpy”:
Martha Stewart on Felicity Huffman: “She should style her outfit a little bit more. She looked pretty schlumpy. She made a horrible mistake, and she’s experiencing what happens.” #VFSummit pic.twitter.com/zlQrvKv4gO
— VANITY FAIR (@VanityFair) October 22, 2019
Most of the time, Martha tends to keep her responses about her time in prison short and superficial, like this. What’s notable here is that Brian Stelter specifically asked her if she thought Felicity has “learned anything” in prison. In 2017, when Martha finally went on the record about her “horrifying experience” in prison on the Today show, they asked if she felt she had learned anything, and her response was decidedly no.
Asked if she found prison “a growth experience,” Stewart said nothing good emerged from the five months she spent in 2004 at a minimum-security federal prison in West Virginia.
“That you can make lemons out of lemonade? What hurts you makes you stronger? No. None of those adages fit at all. It’s a horrible experience. Nothing is good about it, nothing,” she said.
In that light, this was absolutely the wrong question to ask Martha, especially while she is on stage, as a businesswoman, talking about cooking and media. But I get her response. Martha’s brand is b-tchy grandmother with a batch of cookies so her reply plays into that. But I also think it’s a protective diversion tactic to avoid talking about what she knows Felicity is going through.
Plus, I’m sure there’s a dose of resentment because Martha got five months and Felicity only got two weeks.
Thanks to DListed for the story.
perfect time to recall Martha Stewart's iconic poncho when she was released from prison pic.twitter.com/dCdaP1twy7
— Dartunorro D. Clark (@DartDClark) May 31, 2018
Photo credit: YouTube, Twitter and WENN Photos
Martha’s response was totally on brand for her and how she speeks about prison time.I think it’s her way of not talking about her own experience,and also letting people know she would never…never have done the cheating scandal thing to get her daughter into college.Just my take. I Like Martha.
That is not shade.
That is a read!
Plus ALL of the ones! People call every diss “shade” but “shade” is when they don’t specify who they are talking about, but you *know.*
This was absolutely a read. And a pretty gentle one, I might say!
I bet you Aunt Becky is quaking in her (Mossimo for Target) boots. <- also a read. Of two people at once! LOL.
First comment ever but that double shade moment was gold and I had to give you props hahaha
Martha is my all time favourite Bitchy!
I agree. I adore her in all her bitchy glory!
How is she supposed to dress nicely when they have to wear a uniform? Also those sneakers are underarmour, not new balance. That tweet is senseless… Btw Martha was convicted for conspiracy, obstruction of justice and lying to federal investigators. She didn’t actually go to jail for insider trading, rather for lying about it and hiding it.
That is absolutely correct. Martha didn’t go to jail for insider trading. She went to jail because she refused to testify against her friend. Contempt.
Oh Martha *sigh*. They ask about time in prison and all she can come up with is a bitchy comment about Felicity’s outfit.? Ask her more!
That’s Martha. Her only sense of humor is a backhanded compliment.
PS Martha is a rage monster. I feel horrible for every person on site after that segment stopped filming that got bitched at for daring to ask her that question during a business/ food meeting. Heads rolled.
LOL, I’m sorry, but can you think of anything more upper class white lady to say? This is a hardcore older lady throw down. Meet her in the cage, Felicity.
while I agree with you, That’s Martha’s brand though
Ugh. Soooo not what we need right now. Superficial prattle. I might enjoy silliness if we weren’t drowning in serious daily avalanches from Washington to each little corner of our lives. Maintaining vanity while sporting a prison jumper should be no-brainer intelligence killer for someone Martha’s age. It’s not funny. It’s not cute. Federal crimes swept these women behind bars. I couldn’t care less how they look.
I couldn’t agree more.
Agreed!
It was 2004. The question was out of context and purposely provocative.
I think she was trying to make a joke of it, and bat it back at the reporter.
The reporter doesn’t actually care what she thinks about Felicity (if they even know each other). The reporter was just trying to throw it in her face that she went to jail – in 2004 – and maybe get a reaction.
The reporter was being a jackass. She served her time. Let it go.
It’s not like Martha dresses well, period.
I deeply enjoy that she is BFFs with Snoop Dogg.