I’m covering all the controversies today! And I’m crossing the holiday line to do so. I’ve got Chrissy Tiegen’s Turkey defamation on one side and on the other, I have the Brits coming for Mariah Carey. Specifically, Mariah’s Christmas Anthem: All I Want for Christmas is You. According to Variety, a mobile phone company called I Hate Joy Huawei, conducted a survey among British folk of the Most Annoying Christmas Song and they listed AIWfCiY as number 1. I’m telling you, I. Can. Not.
The full survey results for Britain’s most annoying Christmas song:
1. All I Want for Christmas is You – Mariah Carey
2. Do They Know It’s Christmas? – Band Aid
3. I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday – Wizzard
4. Merry Xmas Everybody – Slade
5. Last Christmas – Wham!
6. Fairytale of New York – The Pogues and Kirsty MacColl
7. Baby It’s Cold Outside – Tom Jones & Cerys Matthews
8. Santa Claus is Coming to Town – Jackson 5
9. Santa Baby – Eartha Kitt
10. Jingle Bells – Andrews Sisters
The divine Mistress Carey does not need me to defend her or her song. She’s already turned this article into two-ply and replied to Old Blimey with “I don’t know where that is.” I I could take up much of this page with an essay on the delight that song brings me every single time it comes on, but I have a lot of work to do with the rest of this list instead. Band Aid? I feel attacked. When you dismiss the song, you dismiss the video and all that hair (so much hair). And you dismiss Sting’s precious little smile when he sings the word “sting,” or Bono’s body contortions trying to punch out a note, or Phil Collins drumming for his very life. Fine, ruin Band Aid for me but, and I will try to say this as politely as possible, my dear friends across the pond: take Eartha Kitt’s name out of your mouth until you show her the respect she’s due. What’s making all this worse is The Guardian did their own survey and confirmed everything Variety reported. Except – and this is a huge except – The Guardian listed Bing Crosby/David Bowie’s duet at number one. I realize that’s where Bowie would also put it, but I can’t, I love it so. And now that they are both dead, I cry the good tears when I hear it. You hear me Britain – I cry. Honestly, this tweet says everything for me on the matter:
We’ll throw your goddamn tea out again if you keep running your mouth https://t.co/NUt3GCY7sV
— Zara Rahim (@ZaraRahim) December 1, 2019
Ashamedly, I could probably make an argument for each song on both lists, I have no objectivity when it comes to holiday music (or Slade). The only holiday song I tend to turn off is Happy Xmas (War Is Over) by John Lennon, forgive my Beatles-loving heart. But I’m okay shelving most remakes of these songs. Like, for instance, I’m happy to never hear Hilary Duff sing Wonderful Christmastime or Taylor Swift sing Last Christmas.
Speaking of Last Christmas, CB just clued me in to Whamaggedon, the battle to see who can go the longest without hearing the original version of Last Christmas. The rules are posted here, good luck out there. Honestly, I might as well tap out now.
The good thing about going out of #whamaggedon on 1st December is being able to listen to the radio without fear of failure.
— Nikki Smith Esq.❄🇪🇺 #stopbrexit #revokeA50 (@NikkiSSmith) December 2, 2019
Photo credit: Twitter, WENN Photos and Getty Images
Everything Mariah Carey is annoying to me tbh and although I am not a Brit I do live in the UK. We need a dose of self-deprecation around here. Which also explains the second choice I guess 🤷🏽♀️
Self depreciation is fun but it seems to me that they just listed all the Christmas songs. All the songs! Brits apparently don’t like any Christmas music.
Personally I like almost all of them but I have to admit the Mariah song is overplayed so I can see how it would become annoying.
Worst Christmas ever to me is Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time by Paul McCartney. Hands down.
Yes!!! It’s like, you’re a Beatle! You couldn’t do better than this??!
That drives me up a wall! People know to turn it off around me.
Shit, now I’m singing it in my head and it’s stuck! Thanks.
Yeah, boy. Can’t stand that song. :p
Agreed, I hate that song!
LMFAO! I can believe it MC is pretty annoying herself!
I prefer the version of All I want for Christmas sung by the little girl in Love Actually.
But I want to fight these people over Eartha Kitt and Wham.
‘It’s the season to be annoyed by others frivolity.
Eartha Kitt and the Jackson 5 on here too? yikessss. I’m disgusted.
Mariah’s song is fire and her version is amazing…..it’s all the other versions of it that suck. I know, I worked retail as a student in a mall so I’ve got a PhD in annoying Xmas music, so trust and believe that song isn’t it.
I think their radio stations must play really good christmas songs because these are pretty good IMO. I can’t stand the carpenters or the “serious” soundering ones (except for a I do love a solemn O Holy Night).
I really like the fun ones (like the Ronnettes and Darlene Love) and feel like I don’t hear those ones nearly as much as I should. They are great!
O Holy Night does me in every time. Just love it. It’s particularly beautiful in French.
I love that damn song, it reminds me of my favorite Christmas movie, Love Actually. I cry like a baby every time I watch.
I barely lasted seven hours in Whamageddon. RIP me.
I hate Last Christmas SO MUCH. I don’t know why. I just think its the dumbest song lol. So the list got that one right lol.
Besides that – the only other song I “hate” is Paul McCartney’s “simply having a wonderful Christmastime.” I turn it off as fast as I can when it comes on the radio.
Bing Crosby and Bowie make me smile every time I hear it. “Peace on earth. Can it be?”
And of course MC’s opening “IIIIII……….don’t want a lot for Christmas” just makes me want to belt the song every single time.
Same here! I hate, hate, hate Last Christmas! My least favorite Christmas song ever, followed closely by Santa Baby (especially the Madonna version). A Wonderful Christmas Time isn’t far behind.
I’ve watched Wham’s video for “Last Christmas” 5x already so I can’t even begin to play this game. Haha …not to mention “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” haha 💝
I HATE with a passion the song Last Christmas. It drives me completely batty.. and anything to do with the Chimpmunks Christmas.
To each their own. I like Mariah’s song. It’s lively and upbeat – I appreciate a good jaunty Christmas tune. And I love “Do They Know It’s Christmas?”…brings back memories of childhood.
I hate the Christmas Shoes song. I’m a grinch.
Let’s grinch together the hell out of these annoying songs!!!!
The self deprecation of many Brits honestly makes me question if they’re okay. It’s as if everything annoys the living hell out of them.
Blasphemy!
I like the song but Mariah is the most damn annoying of all time.
I don’t understand how every slot of that list isn’t filled with “Grandma got run over by a reindeer.”
Oh, there you go. That would be my list.
Fairytale of New York!
I bet the Royal Reporters came up with this list.
Just saw her holiday show in Vegas……girl is a hot mess.
From someone that doesn’t celebrate Christmas, you have no idea how annoying all Christmas songs are to me (you can’t avoid them, they are played in every damn store). It would be ok for one week out of the year…but two months ?!!! That’s too much. I know retailers want you in the “buying” mood so they do this, but it drives me crazy.
This is the time of the year when I happily shop with headphones on
That’s a good way to stay in Whammageddon, too.
This is the first I have heard of Whamageddon. My friends play a game where you try to avoid hearing any part of any version of the Little Drummer Boy song. It started a week or so ago because ours starts as soon as you hear Xmas music in a store. One year it started in October! You have to make it to midnight on Xmas eve. The stories about how people get taken out are often hilarious & the best part of the game.
Can’t stand the Paul McCartney song. Don’t like Last Christmas.
And I get a kick out of The Twelve Pains of Christmas. It almost never gets played, but it encapsulates so much. The poor guy fighting with the lights was every year as a kid.
And Straight No Chaser had two fun ones: their 12 days of Christmas and the Christmas Can-can.
For me, it’s a tie between Santa Baby and Baby It’s Cold Outside. I hate both of those songs and any version that’s ever been done of them. It has nothing to do with the #MeToo movement either. I have always hated them. All I Want For Christmas is an excellent song and Mariah is undervalued as a songwriter IMO. She also wrote Where Are You Christmas!
I never liked the song either tbh.
Everybody has a different taste when it comes to music, and especially Christmas songs are connected to memories and emotions….you can’t argue about what is great or annoying.
However, although it’s understood that Mariah Carey is an excellent singer, the WAY she sings simply annoys the heck out of me… it always did, since I first heard her. For my ears, she spoils every song as she NEVER sings a single note straight. Every line she sings, every verse, every refrain, every bridge, her voice goes up and down countless times as if she HAS to show off her impressive voice range….like it’s not about the music, but about HER VOICE… Too much, too vain. I want to tell her: yes, you have a fantastic voice, I KNOW IT, but… could you PLEASE just SING that song!!!???
And she’s not the only one; I feel the same about other singers, too. Christina Aguilera comes to my mind, for example (sorry, I can’t explain it better in English; and of course this is just my opinion)
The song “All I want for Christmas” is a perfect example for this “too much” that spoils it for me, and therefore I can’t stand it.
Mariah is a goddess, period. Either the Brits don’t know that or it annoys them, too. Did Mariah really say she didn’t know where England was? If she did, fabulous!
Mariah has grown on me over the years. She’s a hilarious diva. And she works. Her Xmas album has been popular for years now. She doesn’t deserve the top spot.
Grandma got run over by a Reindeer does. And it didn’t even chart! SMDH
They can keep Wham! too. And Bing/Bowie. Yes, they are great, but that was terrible.
Mariah probably shouldn’t be on that list at all. Nor the Jacksons, nor Eartha. I have a hard time listening to MJ now, but that is an objectively great funk jam. As with so much of what the J5 did. They were great on the Cher show too. It’s on youtube.
The Squirrel Nut Zippers have a pretty fun Xmas album. Christmas in Carolina is my fave on there.
My favorite Christmas song is I’ll be home for Christmas especially when sung by a choir. But worst song will always be the Band Aid one “Do They Know?”. Who cares if it won’t be snowing. Also “well tonight thank God it is them instead of you” makes everyone cringe.
I’m not crazy about All I Want For Christmas but I would take it over Wonderful Christmastime which is a pure horror, haha. And it’s 40 years old this year, woo! And yet it’s a thing of beauty compared to Madonna’s version of Santa Baby, quite possibly the worst Christmas song version ever recorded. Horrid and idiotic. Poor Eartha should not be on this list for that song, Madonna should!
I was a teenager in the 80s so songs like Last Christmas and DTKIC are in a special realm for me. While LC might be a little twee, George’s gorgeous voice elevates it forever. Cover versions can’t capture the sweetness of it. Band Aid was so massive and so many of my fave artists took part. Hecate, I love your descriptions of it!! Did you ever watch the making of documentary? Pure joy.
A lot of these songs are simply overplayed every year. I’m surprised Christmas Wrapping by The Waitresses didn’t make the list (but also glad as it’s a huge, personal fave).