In the Gossip With Celebitchy podcast coming out this Monday, Kaiser and I talk about her urge to cut her hair. She put off going to the hairdresser before all this and now her (natural, long, wash and air dry, I’m jealous can you tell?) hair has grown a bit and has split ends. Spoiler – she’s considering cutting it, which she did when she was young and usually screwed up. Don’t do it Kaiser! I have long layered blonde hair and luckily I’ve been box dyeing it for about two years, which I am absolutely keeping up in quarantine. There is no way I would try to cut it myself. More people are seeing me in video chats than I typically socialized with in any given week, although of course it’s not the same. Queer Eye’s hair expert, Johnathan Van Ness, was on Fallon’s at-home show to promote his new children’s book. (Sidenote: Fallon is doing wonderfully from home. I think his wife is behind most of it, and it’s the perfect mix of open, vulnerable, and family-friendly.) Fallon asked for self-isolating haircutting tips and Johnathan didn’t mince words.
What is the advice for people who want to cut their hair?
The most important advice is just to not do it. Just don’t do it. The average human head grows between a quarter of an inch and half an inch of hair a month. Worse case scenario this is going to give you like 2, 3 inches of hair. Try a new look. Maybe you need a shag. Maybe you need a little bit of length. Save your haircuts. You don’t want to mess up your hair so bad you’re growing your hair out after the quarantine.
This is what I’m saying! Also I have seen so many friends dye their hair wild colors at this time. Hecate did a dark blue that looks really cool and I saw that Jennifer Love Hewitt just did a nice pink shade. Not everyone I know is getting good results and keep in mind if you screw your hair up now there’s no one to fix it! Once I dyed my eyebrows before a big date, ended up looking like Groucho Marx, and had to run crying to my colorist (he’s a Trump supporter, which is why I now dye at home). He gave me some powder to take it out.
So don’t cut your hair please! Just wait it out. I know this is a superficial topic, but a lot of us are thinking abou it. I also worry about people who need dental work, surgery and other procedures at this point.
Here’s Jonathan’s interview. It’s worth watching for his super cute calico cat, who sits on his lap, and the sweet way he talks about his cats. Jonathan has so many cute videos of his cats on his Instagram channel! He does their voices in different accents as they sit in the little TV cat scratching box and read the news. It’s adorable. He has four cats.
Here’s one the CATV Mews segments! It is absolutely worth watching.
And he officiated a wedding online!
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Something told me to check my DMs yesterday. I found a message from Stephanie @laxpirate , explaining that she and her fiancé Samantha @punny_lane had their first date at my show in Indianapolis last summer and now in light of cancelling their planned big wedding if I could virtually officiate. The donation to the @damiencenter really blew me away 💗 I’m so so happy for these two & that I checked that message. 💗 Young inner child me is so happy seeing queer love win in the Midwest 🏳️🌈💗