Robert Lacey: Duchess Meghan ‘has an incredible & dangerous level of self-belief’

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle celebrate Anzac Day in London

Earlier this week, we discussed an upcoming royal book called Battle of Brothers: William and Harry – The Inside Story of a Family in Tumult, by Robert Lacey. As I said at the time, Lacey isn’t actually known as a hack, nor is one of the royal commentators known for simply blaming every single thing on the Duke and Duchess of Sussex. And yet, given all of the advance publicity for the book from those same gleeful smear agents, many believed that this book will contain lots of negativity and nastiness towards Meghan and Harry. Well… as part of the promotion, Lacey spoke to the Daily Mail and this interview is something else. You can read the full piece here. Highlights:

There really is a battle between Harry & William: ‘Some say, “Oh, it doesn’t matter. It will blow over.” But that’s not what historians will be saying in ten years’ time. If this breach between the brothers is not healed in some way it will come to stand with the Abdication crisis and the death of Diana as one of the traumas that changed the monarchy. There is time to change things in a positive direction, but at the moment the Palace is not working in that direction.’

He spoke to lots of royal insiders: For his own book, Robert spent months talking to royal insiders about when the cracks in the brothers’ relationship started to appear (spoiler alert: it happened earlier than you think), and, pointedly, how the system of monarchy conspired to fan the flames of resentment rather than broker a compromise between the two. Above all, he insists the relationship between the princes is critical to the future of the Royal Family. ‘It matters,’ he says. ‘It’s a question of values, even about the national morale. The idea of our modern royalty was built on the idea of these two brothers.’

Meghan’s self-belief: ‘What you’ve got to realise is that the whole strategy of the monarchy was based on them sticking together. Meghan changed all that. She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief. But the Palace got this very wrong, as it always does with the second-born. They always treat the second-born badly, not to say cruelly. It happened with Princess Margaret. It happened with Prince Andrew. It’s the classic heir and the spare thing. They just don’t know what to do with the spare. And they certainly didn’t know what to do with the spare’s wife.’

No comes out unscathed: The Duke and Duchess of Sussex, as depicted in the book, are self-pitying, and assume an astonishing level of entitlement. Prince William is praised for having the duty gene but described as having a terrible temper. Even the Queen comes in for criticism. Harry is, by turns, hapless and hurt, but a young man who finds in Meghan an escape. ‘He finds new destiny,’ Robert says today. ‘He realised there was something rotten at the heart of royalness that is not for him.’

Charles is largely absent: It has been a long time since William has sought counsel from his father, Robert suggests. ‘William looks to his grandmother for his values, not to his father. He thinks his father has . . . lost his way. But perhaps there is still time for Charles to act. I hope so.’

Everyone has rather lost their way. Robert is careful not to apportion blame but does believe the Palace handled ‘the Meghan situation’ appallingly. ‘There is only one self-made millionaire in the Royal Family and that is Meghan Markle. If they had sat down with her at the start and said, “Let’s talk about the things you are interested in”, things might have been different. They just sent her off to watch the Queen opening the Mersey Bridge. There is nothing wrong with that, but they made the mistake of dealing with the spare’s wife thinking she was just a routine royal. She was never going to be a routine royal.’

On Meghan’s race. ‘I don’t want to go too deeply into the race thing, because that is another minefield altogether, but with Meghan the Royal Family had a mixed-race recruit, and for a monarchy that represents a mixed-race nation and a mixed-race commonwealth this was important. Is it any wonder Barbados and Jamaica are now saying, “We are signing off. We can do without the Queen, thank you very much.” To have failed to hold on to their mixed-race recruit was a mistake.’ Didn’t the whole sorry mess come about because, as he puts it in the book, the ‘Windsors don’t do woke’? ‘They don’t do woke, but if they are to survive, the Windsors have to find their own way to do woke.’

William the rage-monster: ‘Does Prince William want to go down in history as the king who couldn’t hold his family together? This thing has to be resolved, one way or the other.’

[From The Daily Mail]

“She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.” I was appalled that he said that, but I’ve been sitting here, thinking about it, and I honestly believe he’s saying that as “Meghan wasn’t going to just roll over and be subservient to the Crown, nor should she.” And I agree that this was bungled from the Queen and her coterie of old-man advisors. There was something deeply rotten in the House of Windsor before Meghan even came along. Anyway, discuss! I do think there will be some fascinating tea in this book now.

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295 Responses to “Robert Lacey: Duchess Meghan ‘has an incredible & dangerous level of self-belief’”

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  1. Jay says:

    “She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.”

    Dangerous to whom, exactly? How many men do you think he’s described as having a “dangerous” level of self-belief. And I wonder what level of self confidence, exactly, would be considered “safe” for a biracial American woman entering the royal family? I’m guessing the answer to both of those questions is “zero”.

    • Amy Bee says:

      I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and say he’s talking from the view of the Royal Family. But I agree it doesn’t look right either way.

    • Couch potato says:

      Based on the rest, I have a feeling he was quoting one of the men in grey, and the Mail wrote it as his words.

      • LaraK says:

        This. I definitely think he was talking in terms of her fitting into a traditional palace role.
        And her self-belief IS dangerous to the palace. They were always going to view her as a threat.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        Must agree. With other things said in the interview, I now see Kaiser’s take and agree that Meghan was not going to roll over. It must be said that both Charles and Diana have been described as “dangerous” for the monarchy. This was said about Charles when he was in his 20′s and became an ecological & architectural warrior and it was said about Diana when she put herself front-and-center as a PR warrior for the AIDS crisis.

      • Ginger says:

        I agree.

        I am curious about this book. The excerpts should be releasing soon. I’m more curious about how this book covers Harry and William’s relationship.

    • LahdidahBaby says:

      Only a woman’s level of self-belief would ever be called dangerous.

      • Izzy says:

        Her level of self-belief is dangerous LMAO Sure, Jan.

        If we were talking about a mediocre white man, they’d be praising his confidence.

      • Kalana says:

        They devoted seasons of The Crown to Philip’s man pain and pride and reduced the women mainly to their romances.

        Support goes both ways and the BRF showed their hand several times over. Even The Times published an illegal picture of the Cotswolds house along with the fake tiara scandal. Meghan was dangerous because she wouldn’t accept this?

    • Eating popcorn says:

      Perhaps it is dangerous to herself – meaning that the palace would never tolerate the spare’s wife having her own (harmless) agenda & standing up for it.

    • SpankyB says:

      I don’t agree with the words he used, but the bottom line is he’s saying Meghan is too smart and too good for the RF and they blew it, bigly. He just couldn’t say it without showing his misogyny and racism.

    • equality says:

      I think he means dangerous to the monarchy as an institution because she stands up for what she believes instead of taking on traditional roles like Kate does. I don’t think she or Charles have lost their way. The rest of them have because they don’t seem to have passion for important things that they are willing to stand up for.

    • Madelaine says:

      @Jay: That’s what I came here to say. “Dangerous level of self-belief”: is this the new phrasing for black and bi-racial intelligence and self-respect these days? Does it mean that ‘uppity’ exotic woman has run out of fashion already? How on earth did I miss the linguistic shift of the digital age by which assertive, articulate non-white women are now presented as no less than a threat to the racially exclusive English establishment? I just wish I had updated sooner my post colonial ethnocentric univocally racist dictionary. And God bless all the demure Kensington stepford wives for their much welcome self-imposed silence and inability to elaborate ideas if their own.

      • cisne says:

        Love this.

      • Dee Kay says:

        *standing ovation*

      • Lemons says:

        I actually don’t think he was speaking literally from his perspective because it’s a weird turn of phrase. But, if speaking from the perspective of the BRF, it is a dangerous level of self-belief for the firm because there is no SELF, there is only the Crown.

        Robert also takes some shots, acknowledging the Meghan is the only self-made millionaire, the only one who has experience making things happen, not just being available for a photo op when others have done things.

    • khaveman says:

      Hm, a woman with confidence? We see how they are vilified in general (how dare they not do what you tell them to do, gents). So this doesn’t faze me. Keep up the good work, M&H.

    • Lorelei says:

      God forbid a woman — biracial, no less! — actually have an independent thought of her own

  2. Va Va Kaboom says:

    Sooooo, I whole heartedly believed literally everything else he said on its face value. Not saying it’s all true, but… I can’t with good conscience immediately dismiss or parse out his comment on Meghan because I don’t like it. (That was damn near painful to type).

    • Megan H says:

      I’m kind of in agreement. “Dangerous level of self belief” is incredibly subjective. So is “she’s difficult.” I’m sure she was difficult for some people, because she actually wanted to work.

      And I’m also starting to wonder if maybe Harry didn’t prep her for the nuances of dealing with the courtiers.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        I’d like to point out that “a dangerous level of self-belief” has subtextual layers when it is applied to a woman who is also a PoC because it is embedded in centuries old discourse about how self-confident are dangerous to the white, patriarchal order.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        Per Peter Morgan, screenwriter for “The Crown”:

        “Really, the only version of events that works is if somebody comes in and becomes invisible, and just sort of knuckles down to a lifetime of agreeable supplicancy to the duties of the crown. Diana struggled to fit in with the institution in a way that it’s impossible not to see the parallels with Meghan Markle and Harry. ”

        Of course Meghan would be seen as “dangerous” as she was not going to “become invisible” as both Kate and Sophie have done.

      • June-o says:

        It may have been impossible for Harry to adequately prep her for the courtiers, because Harry’s knowledge and perspective of their behavior would have greatly diverged from what Meghan experienced. As he recently said, marrying Meghan has “awakened” him to unconscious bias and structural racism, and I think he was referring very much to her negative and traumatic experiences with people who’ve by contrast obsequiously deferred to him his whole life.

    • Kalana says:

      He keeps talking about Meghan in a dehumanizing way. She is the mixed-race recruit. But he refuses to talk about the racist harassment she received. He just sees her as a thing to be used by white people without giving a shit about how that affected Meghan.

      He says that the Palace handled things appallingly but Meghan and Harry were self-pitying. He doesn’t care about how they feel even if he admits the Sussexes were treated appallingly.

      In that context I can see him viewing Meghan’s emotionally healthy boundaries and self-esteem as dangerous. ( Dangerous to whom?)

      He also said William had the duty gene so ….

      Imagine this being said about Lizzy Bennett. Lacey sounds like Lady Catherine DeBourgh. “You speak your mind most decidedly for someone so young.” Imagine this being said about Kate and Lacey thinking he could get away with it.

      Many royal Karens hate Meghan ( and call it BEC) because they think she’s “uppity.”

      • ArtHistorian says:

        If William has the “duty” gene then why has he spent so much time and effort to avoid doing his duty?

      • Becks1 says:

        @ArtHistorian – I cant believe these people can say William has a sense of duty with a straight face. But I guess its one of the only things they can say about him – they cant say he’s passionate about his causes, or he connects so well with people, or outworks the other royals. They can just sort of vaguely talk about his sense of “duty”.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        I want to know more about why William thinks “Charles has lost his way”. This would be one great chapter in a book on the BRF.

        Does anyone think William would have the ability to raise $20 million to save Dumfries House and all that has progressed from this project?

      • Kalana says:

        I think it’s because Charles isn’t as rightwing as William. Maybe Charles is even against Brexit.

      • Harper says:

        William doesn’t have a duty gene! He performs his duty because he has yet to figure out a way to get out of doing royal work completely. So he does it, half-heartedly, while dreaming of a way out.

      • BnLurkN4eva says:

        Perhaps he thought his father has lost his way because he didn’t get fully on board with William smearing and gaslighting his brother and sister in law. I get the feeling that while Charles doesn’t like to be out shined and may have occasionally put out little nuggets making himself look like he’s the peace maker, or whatever he was attempting. He wasn’t in one the all out smearing of Meghan in an attempt to drive her out of the family. Perhaps William knew Charles liked Meghan and even supported her goals and we all know that William feels that he’s the only one who is supposed to get any recognition for anything positive.

      • Yvette says:

        @BnLurkN4eva .. I think William has a deep seated dislike of Charles and Charles’s ‘woke’ nature. Let’s face it, sending letters to World Leaders in an attempt to school them in climate change and talking to vegetables and plants? I find that woke as heck! :)

        William goes around Charles to the Queen for advice just like he went around Charles to Carol and her husband in the role of grandparents to George when he was born. As I recall, the Cambridges spent so much time with the Middletons after George was born that Charles leaked the fact that he never got to spend time with his grandson to the press. I think William believes ‘he’ should be the next King rather than his father, and that he doesn’t respect his father’s position above him. It’s no secret that Diana was on a campaign to have Charles skipped in the line of succession in favor of William. I don’t doubt William was told it as well.

        Could the Queen decide to skip over Charles in favor of William?? I think the Courtiers are afraid for Charles to be King because he was always seen as ‘different.’ And … the man talks to his growing vegetables and plants! :)

      • Katie says:

        Really beautifully said.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        @Yvette, – No, the Queen can’t just decide to skip Charles for William. The Succession is enshrined in law and it would take a LOT to change it. Furthermore, the institution itself wouldn’t want to have the succession legally challenged. The monarchy rests upon the concept of heredity, more specifically primogeniture. It isn’t a popularity contest and challenging the very nature of the Line of Succession based on William being more popular than Charles would invite the question of why don’t we chose a head of state based on merit instead? And that would threaten the institution itself. The only way William can become king before Charles is if the Queen outlives her firstborn son.

      • Yvette says:

        @ArtHistorian … Thanks for the clarification! :)

      • Ginger says:

        I agree Becks1. He has no choice but to have a sense of duty, he is the heir.

      • Tessa says:

        Yvette, If Diana had been around today I doubt she’d want William as the next. King. He is not like Diana anymore, he is very cold and manipulative and not averse to throwing his brother under a bus. Harry is the one most like Diana now.

      • February-Pisces says:

        I have a feeling no one wants Willie to be king, even the courtiers. He’s too difficult, stubborn and always incandescent with rage. I think the courtiers are humouring him at the moment hoping he that if they give him what he wants (destroying harry and Meghan) then he might settle. The reason they loved the queen when she was young was because she was more amenable and could be easily manipulated. The queen will do what she thinks is best for the monarchy, whereas William does what’s best for himself and his own image. I can’t imagine him having weekly meetings with the prime minister or reading the daily papers in the red box. He only seem to work when there’s a camera present and so bots can praise him to the heavens for showing up.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        @Yvette – Only the UK Parliament can change the line of succession with concurrence from all other Commonwealth Realms.

        Therefore, the succession is etched in stone as per the Succession to the Crown Act 2013 enacted by the UK Parliament and as Commonwealth Realms implemented the Perth Agreement into their own laws.

        Charles CANNOT be skipped over.

      • Nic919 says:

        BTB- just as an FYI the commonwealth countries where the Queen is still head of state are not obligated to comply with the succession law as drafted in the UK. When they revised it in 2013 this came up and therefore you could have a situation where one country decided to keep male primogeniture or pass it along to Harry. It is only by convention that they decided to follow the UK draft. Philippe Lagasse wrote an article about it where he noted that Canadian law does not require Canada to follow the British laws of succession.

      • PrincessK says:

        @Kalana…l think you are correct. Charles has a liberal outlook and insiders say William is definitely to the right in his politics.

    • clomo says:

      That was lame, calling her that, I’m trying to be optimistic he meant dangerous because they mistreated her and she wouldn’t take it and it’s dangerous for the Windsors to show their true colors. I am English and never questioned the queen, now I do. It’s not a bad thing Meghan has that strength, it’s only a dangerous thing because light shines on dark and exposes it. I was shocked when they never came out to defend her from the RM smear, when Andrew and W&K especially seem to have a team with the backing of the palace supporting them, it was so lacking for Meghan. Especially since her heritage, it was almost a test and the palace failed miserably..

    • Passerby says:

      I didn’t interpret his comment negatively. Perhaps that’s what he was aiming for. However, I read “ she is a boss and she knows what she wants and she is not going to be sidelined or silenced by her in-laws or anyone else.”
      I think she cares about Harry’s needs and wants and that’s about it. Aside from Prince Archie and Grandma.

      ** Good luck with this whole Royal thing, Wills.

  3. Bibi says:

    “Meghan has incredible self-belief” – i think that is true. She has excellent self esteem which is what we should all thrive to be.
    She is only dangerous because she doesn’t go along with what doesnt go with her. And that’s why she’s a perfect match with Harry’s petsonnality which always seem to have been edgy for me, in an very good way.

    • AJ says:

      This is it right here, folks!
      She so confident and that’s dangerous because you can’t walk over her!

  4. ABritGuest says:

    Robert might as well said she’s uppity. Lady Colin Campbell also talked about how she is ‘disturbingly confident‘.

    Some Brits really do love that bumbling Hugh Grant or Bridget Jones thing so I can see why a confident American would bother but even more a woman of colour who they don’t believe deserved to be in their palace with their Prince. Think if Meghan had done the shy Di thing & seemed overwhelmed to be there it would have gone down better with these types

    They really have a problem with her being relatively self assured which shows me that not shutting down Thomas Markle press & the leaks about difficult duchess etc were designed to ‘put her in her place’ and knock her confidence to then be malleable by the staff. Similar to Sophie after the sheikh scandal and she became a working royal. Just makes you wonder how much of these scandals have the press & palace staff worked on together to achieve certain aims..

    Also seems to be suggesting Meghan wouldn’t want to do the standard royal duties because of being self made when she did do those bread and butter events and did them well and William, Harry & Kate’s position before she even joined was less of those events and more projects.

    Plus race seems to have been a factor for some of the staff who it’s been reported looked down on her, and if Harry & Meghan seemed to feel sorry for themselves maybe it’s because relatives & employees were briefing against them!

    • Amy Bee says:

      You hit the nail on the head.

    • RoyalBlue says:

      you said it. I was just going to say the translation for that was she is uppity.

    • Kalana says:

      A lot of the criticism directed at Meghan is just a variety of dogwhistles to call her “uppity.”

    • Edna says:

      Preach. Say it again for those in the back. Meghan was “uppity” and “didn’t know her place.” Because how dare a woman of color be self confident, have high self esteem and know her worth. AND not be willing to dim her light in the presence of white mediocrity.

    • BayTampaBay says:

      “Robert might as well said she’s uppity. Lady Colin Campbell also talked about how she is ‘disturbingly confident‘.”

      I think this is a British-American cultural divide in behavior. I have three great friends from England (Leicestershire, Norfolk and Kent) who thought I was “uppity and ‘‘disturbingly confident’ ” when they first met me. After they got to know me and other Yank women, they came to the conclusion that any successful Yank woman would be described as “uppity and ‘‘disturbingly confident’ ” by the British because that is how successful women roll in the USA.

      • MsIam says:

        Might funny that a white British woman like Margaret Thatcher wasn’t called “uppity” and “ disturbingly confident”. The British seem to enjoy confidence when it suits them. This was a case of “how dare this black actress come in through the front door and think she is one of us instead of groveling and coming through the back door like she should!”. Maybe if she offered to clean the castle they would have accepted her after 10 year or so. Bunch of f*cking racist snobs in their crumbling manor homes.

      • Harper says:

        Exactly @MsIam! Do you think they call Dame Judith Dench or Dame Maggie Smith uppity with the same sneer? No, they are delightful!

      • Green Desert says:

        @ Bay – that may be, but words like “uppity” and “elitist” and how Lacey describes Meghan are common micro aggressions used against women of color. It may be a British thing, but it’s also a race thing.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        I believe that Helen Mirren may be viewed as “uppity” and “difficult” by some sections of the British Press & British Public.

      • Green Desert says:

        Bay – You’re not wrong, but two things can be true. And we’re saying that using that kind of dog-whistle-y language is also racist. And when applied to Meghan, someone who has been a target of years of racist attacks by the British press, it’s racist.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        @Green Desert – I understand all that you say and agree 100%. Helen Mirren is a republican and the casting director was given hell when she was cast to play QEII in “The Queen”. The point I was trying to make is that the British Tabloids love to pick on people, especially women, they think are “Un-British” and not 100% John Bull. Meghan being a WOC made everything worse X 1000.

  5. S808 says:

    If Meghan’s self belief is dangerous for anybody, it’s the RF. Her self belief is what kept her together during her time there imo. She seems like someone who is very much in tune with who she is and can stand 10 toes down on it, always. Of course it clashed with the RF who breaks and bends the woman that marry in into well…..whatever Kate became. I think in that sense while she was and still very well suited to Harry, she wasn’t suited for the institution. And that’s not a bad thing from where I’m standing.

    As for the boys’ relationship, I also think it’d happened WAY before Meghan came along and her being blamed for it is convenient and gives the RRs a reason to talk freely about it in a way they wouldn’t have been able to otherwise.

    • ShazBot says:

      I agree, I think it was around the time of his service in Afghanistan.

      • BabsORIG says:

        It’s been said that William has been doted on at Harry’s expense from way way back during their childhood. The royals abuse of the spare starts soon after a spare is born and Harry has been reported to complain about the abuse from way way back before even Sandhurst. So no their beef started from childhood. Harry told a tale about how they both fought fiercely in the can and on their to their dad’s after their parents separated and how he’d always win those fights. They had blood is from their childhood and stems from the abuse Harry was always subjected to as the spare.

      • Becks1 says:

        I think he came back from his tours in Afghanistan with a new sense of confidence and purpose and was no longer willing to just be the spare. I wonder if the start of the Invictus Games, which were hugely successful and put Harry squarely in the spotlight, was part of what set William off.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Harry went to Sandhurst, learned he was good at being in the Army, and was ahead of William in that. He won an award as a helo pilot, he deployed. All of those are things Harry earned because he’s better at those things than William. Billy only made it to part-part-part time co-pilot. That makes William incandescent with rage.

        I agree it has been life-long with these two, with William taking advantage of the heir vs. spare treatment by everyone as soon as he recognized it. Harry saw it, saw his brother for what he really is, and determined to do his own thing. Harry created his own charity at 19 with Prince Seeiso, not with his own brother. That’s telling.

    • Lizzie says:

      I think William has always been jealous of Harry’s popularity.

      • Killfanora says:

        Totally agree!

      • February-Pisces says:

        I think Williams jealousy really kicked in when his hair line disappeared and Harry’s looks, charm and charisma really kicked in. Harry was an awkward teen who blossomed in his mid-twenties. Williams looks already started to nosedive by the time he was 25 and his ego couldn’t take it.

      • Tessa says:

        I notice that since Harry and Meghan left, the Cambridge children are trotted out more. There is now a video where they all “sing.” I hope there are no Von Trapp type videos for those kids. It seems like desperation for more attention for the Cambridges.

      • PrincessK says:

        Oh yes, this is part of the agenda and agreement with the media. William never really wanted his kids on show but he now has to reward the press for their assistance in helping him drive out the Sussexes who were threatening him with their popularity, and the price he is paying is handing over his children to the media. Will and Kate on the front page do not sell but the kids do, but the press still know that a dozen Cambridge kid stories is worth one single Archie story.

      • Nic919 says:

        Tessa you posted this the day before a video of the kids was posted asking questions of Attenborough. So while they weren’t singing for their supper, they are now being trotted out and speaking for the first time in public. (All of them are more comprehensible than Kate too)

    • equality says:

      Sad then that William doesn’t take that knowledge from his relationship with Harry and try to do better with his own children. He is already giving George favoritism.

      • Becks1 says:

        William is going to do that because William doesn’t see the problem with how he was raised as the favorite, the special one, etc. He thinks it was fine and that the problem is that Harry refused to fall in line as they got older.

    • Lady2Lazy says:

      @ S808, yes! Meghan was the scapegoat to H & W fallout, as everything that went wrong was Meghans fault! As for her strong sense of self worth, she is entitled to this label as she has proven herself to be a strong woman on her own. She has proven herself through her work for decades and the RF were not prepared for her strong showing of wanting to get into The Firm and start running as they had mentioned at their engagement. They underestimated Meghan and for this they turned out to play themselves as the fools that they are. Meghan could have been a shining stat for them had they taken the time to get to know her and become interested in her ambitions. But instead, Meghan was given zero guidance and the fact that she outshined Keen, that is when everything hit the proverbial fan. Not only had Harry been outshining his brother for years, Wilileaks thought that as he and Keen were a power of two, once Meghan came on board, Harry and Meghan out paced and became the two darlings of The Firm and Wilileaks would not stand by and allow that to happen. Which in turn, they started the smear campaign will all of their might. Now, H&M are across the pond and still outshining W&K and his utter rage of jealousy and so consuming that he can’t get a handle on his own anger. Wilileaks has no one to blame BUT himself!!

  6. ShazBot says:

    I think everything said here is everything people have been saying for years.
    Re:Meg being dangerous – she was dangerous to them and their archaic operating system, and they were both too dumb and too racist and too classist to realize they should have listened to and even learned from her.

    • bluemoonhorse says:

      THIS – overall, so far, I think this book looks interesting.

      • PrincessK says:

        I don’t think that this book reveals anything new, except that the author is taking a more truthful and balanced approach.

  7. phaedra says:

    “She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.”
    That is the highest compliment a misogynist can pay to a woman. Rock on, Meg!

    • Kalana says:

      Yes! I aspire to this!

    • BnLurkN4eva says:

      I agree completely. Whenever a woman is confident and won’t let herself be walked on, she’s often labeled difficult and before MeTo most people fell for it. It’s only since that movement you now see the push back on the difficult label assigned to women. Meghan managed to work well with other for years, so the sudden label of difficult says it’s not HER.

  8. OriginalLala says:

    To me, his comment is clear – her self-confidence is dangerous to the BRF, which is a good thing because the BRF is a horrific institution that should disappear. Keep on keeping on Meghan.

    • bluemoonhorse says:

      Exactly – she’s dangerous to the BRF who didn’t know how to “handle” her. I wish people would read further on.

  9. Myra says:

    “She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief”. That’s just the racism flowing naturally from his lips, which is proven further below when he refuses to acknowledge racism. Even the way he refers to it “I don’t want to go too deeply into the race thing” is problematic.

    By not acknowledging racism, an essential part of this messy saga is completely ignored – what motivated the courtiers to behave the way they did to Meghan? To brief the media against her, give her nicknames, call her degree wife etc. They used the trope of the difficult woman to describe her but then copied her to emulate her popularity and success.

    Meghan is a confident woman who believes in herself and her worth. There is nothing dangerous about that. Maybe for a monarchy which needs its women submissive, but in the real world, confidence is an asset.

    • S808 says:

      I don’t think they will ever admit just how much race played into her treatment which is sad cause it is a KEY factor. None of them seem to want to touch that aspect, I don’t think it’ll ever be explored the way it should be.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        IMHO, there are four aspects of the racism Meghan received and I am not sure they all came about for the same reasons for the same agenda: The BRF itself, The Royal Courtiers, The Royal Rota and Tabloid Writers and the Commentariat of the Daily Fail all played into the racism for very different reasons and did nothing to stop it for very different reasons.

      • BnLurkN4eva says:

        Not in the present time, but I guarantee it will be the thing most discussed down the road. When this period is reviewed in historical context, the racism she has experienced will be at the forefront of that discussion. Not now though because the people discussing her are part of the problem and a part of that system that cause that racism in the first place.

    • Couch potato says:

      You have to remember this is an english man speaking. He’s being shockingly direct about them being rasist, and loosing a big asset in Meghan.

      • Becks1 says:

        I thought the racism comments were interesting, because he says he doesn’t want to get into it, and then basically gets into it and says the royal family is racist and showed its racist face to the world.

      • Myra says:

        I get what you’re saying but if a race reckoning is to happen in UK, then we need to address the way language is used to dehumanise people of colour. The way he describes the events sounds more like he is saying the BRF lost their token person of colour (which hurt their standing globally), rather than him openly calling out the BRF for their racist behaviour (which hurt and caused pain to an individual person). He used enough coded language to keep DM readers satisfied whilst he could call the BRF out for fumbling the ball.

      • BnLurkN4eva says:

        @Myra, I completely agree and I bet he thinks he’s being oh so fair to Meghan and not part of the problem himself.

      • HeatherC says:

        I think he “didn’t want to get into” racism in his interview because that’s a whole huge subject with many levels and facets. It would have derailed his interview which was all about promoting his product (his book) and not speaking as a social commentator on this issue. We’ll see if it’s covered in his book to any depth.

  10. Noki says:

    Meghan was a full grown adult,who had her own mind and ideals when she met Harry. They are upset they couldnt get a Diana (young and naive) or Kate(groomed to be a doormat) for Harry who is just a spare so his wife should be even more in the background and never make any note worthy presence.

  11. Lizzie says:

    “She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.” – Said about no man EVER.

    They are only prepared for someone stepping in at the intern level and she came in already at the executive level. Covering their massive failure they claim Meghan is somehow difficult despite no one in her prior life making that claim and most every member of the Windsor family is famously difficult.

    Where is the danger?

    • Lucy says:

      Right. I hear dangerous self belief and think of an untrained army recruit who suddenly has a tank, a bomb and a big gun and thinks he’s gonna win.
      A full grown woman who isn’t afraid of a white system of power? Gd hero.

  12. lanne says:

    Of course they think it’s “dangerous” that a woman can speak up for herself and believe in herself. These people still operate under the “women who marry in should be grateful to be here” just as many traditionally white companies expect POCs and women to be “grateful to be there.” Confidence is seen as outrageous, and “dangerous”: in their eyes, your confidence should be connected only to your “superiors” and whatever crumbs of praise or affection they flick in your direction. Being able to think for yourself or, gasp, have a sense of self worth means you can’t be manipulated, and that the “superiors” have no real power over you. That’s what was “dangerous” about Meghan. She came into the RF as an accomplished, successful woman with opinions, beliefs, and useable skills. All things that could have been used to benefit a modern-day Royal family. It’s not impossible for accomplished women to succeed as royals: look at Queen Maxima in Netherlands, or Queen Letitia in Spain. When they try to shackle an accomplished career woman, you get Empress Masako, whose life was essentially destroyed by the Japanese imperial family. If the UK RF can’t enter the 21st century, then they, as the UK likely will under Brexit, should diminish. They can “reign” over little England, and be as archaic as they wish.

  13. Couch potato says:

    This book seems to be a lot more dangerous for the royal family than FF. Lacey doesen’t sugarcoat how royally they f#%% up with first Harry, and then Meghan and Harry. He’s making it clear they’ve lost a great asset in her. He doesen’t “want to go to deeply into the rase thing”, but, oh boy does he make it clear they are likely to loose a lot of commonwealth countries because of their rasism! I’m laughing in front of the fireplace right now! Oh, to be a fly on the wall to see the the reactions of the men in grey and the Windsors.

    • Becks1 says:

      The comments about how the royal family messed up with the heir vs spare narrative yet AGAIN and how they handled “the Meghan situation” appallingly…… This book may not make H&M look good but I’m not getting the vibe its going to make William et al look good either.

      • Couch potato says:

        It’s probably good the book isn’t picturing M&H in a rosy red light. That makes it far more dangerous for the Windsors. Especially in these covid and brexit days. From what I’ve read so far, it’s picturing the RF and the men in grey as completely incompetent, out of touch with reality and horribly dysfunctional

      • Kalana says:

        I don’t know about that. Lacey said he sent the manuscript to Buckingham Palace but conveniently left out whether he sent it to Kensington Palace or the Sussexes. I mean in what reality does William have the duty gene.

        He did say William has a terrible temper so we’ll see.

      • Couch potato says:

        Buckingham Palace probably gets all the books written about them. If the authors can make the RF make a statement about the books, they get far mor publicity = more sales. He didn’t say Will has the duty gene, he said he is praised for it but have a terrible temper. I’m looking forward to see the reactions from Windsors!

      • ArtHistorian says:

        I’m really interested in the stuff about William’s temper. I know that people joke about him being “incandescent” with rage on this site – but making it a joke sort of obscures the reality, especially if it is true that he has anger issues.

      • Couch potato says:

        Hasn’t it been said for years that he’s used to get what he want, and throw tantrums if he don’t? It’s a running joke on this site, but I’m pretty sure I’ve read about it other places as well.

      • Becks1 says:

        It’s pretty much the one consistent thing we hear about William’s personality – that he has a temper. It seems obvious that he’s unable to control it and you have to consider how it affects the people around him, like Kate. Living with someone with a very bad temper who makes no attempt to control it (and there is an unequal power structure in your marriage since he’s the royal, not you) – that’s going to take a toll.

      • Kalana says:

        Around when Will and Kate married, Kate was described as the only person who could influence and manage William into doing something and the family was willing to accept her because of that, because ultimately Kate wanted a stable monarchy for herself and her then future children.

        That family has walked on eggshells around William for sometime although the Queen does seem to like difficult people.

      • Lady D says:

        @Kalana, he said BP returned the manuscript unopened.

      • Nic919 says:

        He was called Billy the basher as a child so it’s obvious he never really outgrew this tantrums. Being coddled as FFK from birth by people like the Queen mum and then by officials at school, etc, William is like Trump in that they have never faced real consequences for their childish behaviour. And when he doesn’t get his way, that’s when he gets mad. Harry likely didn’t really challenge William until he had Meghan as his support, which William already stuck in his selfish ways in his late 30s was never going accept.

      • equality says:

        And they still aren’t learning. There is already favoritism for George with the Queen and William, and apparently, David Attenborough.

      • Tessa says:

        I think William married Kate because she enabled him. She had no ambition or work ethic and the two spent years vacationing and partying until she go the ring.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Kalana, Kate doesn’t manage William, Carole does. Carole manages both of these overgrown, immature adult adolescents. Carole is the only reason this relationship made it to marriage, and she’s always behind the scenes (as per the staff leaks), trying to keep the peace between W&K. There are three people in this marriage too, and that’s before you start counting all of William’s side pieces.

      • Tessa says:

        Gary Goldsmith bashed Harry and Meghan, I wonder if Carole condoned it? Next James or pippa will say something. So pathetic.

      • PrincessK says:

        William’s temper may explain Kate’s weight loss, living with an angry temperamental man is no fun.

    • Mumbles says:

      This book is going to be dangerous because he has a lot more gravitas than the FF authors. He’s a historian with serious credibility and while he has been focusing on the Royals as of late, his work has encompassed all sorts of topics, e.g. Saudi Arabia. And he doesn’t have a dog in the fight. Did anyone even know he was working on this book until now?

      And while the focus has been on the Meghan comment, it doesn’t look like anyone’s going to come out unscathed. Ragey William, dithering Charles, and a Royal Family who was given an asset – as he points out, Meghan is self-made and a quick learn – and wasted it.

      • Couch potato says:

        Yes, as a historian he has a lot more gravitas, and a whole different perspective on the long time consequences of their actions.

        It looks far worse for the Windsors, from mpv. Based on the rest, I’m not so sure the things about Meghan are his thoughts. It sounds more like he’s said something about how the RF and the courtiers have seen her, and the Mail has written it as a quote from him.

        This is baad news for the Windsors, indeed

      • bluemoonhorse says:

        Agree. Several things that I’m liking so far:
        * “cracks in the brothers’ relationship started to appear (spoiler alert: it happened earlier than you think)”
        * “But the Palace got this very wrong, as it always does with the second-born. They always treat the second-born badly, not to say cruelly.”
        * ‘He finds new destiny,’ Robert says today. ‘He realised there was something rotten at the heart of royalness that is not for him.’
        * ‘There is only one self-made millionaire in the Royal Family and that is Meghan Markle. If they had sat down with her at the start and said, “Let’s talk about the things you are interested in”, things might have been different.
        * for a monarchy that represents a mixed-race nation and a mixed-race commonwealth this was important. Is it any wonder Barbados and Jamaica are now saying, “We are signing off. We can do without the Queen, thank you very much.”

        One reason he may not want to stress the race thing – just spitballing – is because he is not a minority and perhaps didn’t want to write as if he understood something he didn’t. Another more likely reason, is if he shows how they mistreated the situation of M&H without even delving into the racist angle (which BTW in the interview he totally did), he can argue his point to those who deny racism played a part.

        Overall, of all the books mentioned on this site, this seems the most interesting.

      • Nic919 says:

        I agree. FF was written off by one side because they thought it was biased. It will be very hard to dismiss this book.

        Not a fan of the micro aggressions about Meghan being dangerously confident, but if it means that she’s a danger to the monarchy because of their intransigence then I can see where that argument is going.

  14. Maliksmama says:

    Now we know why there are daily articles on H&M. The BRF is angry. They need Harry to help William keep the monarchy going. Didn’t they know this before he left? Why did they antagonize him daily for two years straight? William has a temper? How bad is it? Is he violent? Is this why Kate looks like she does?Did he show Meghan his temper? Is that what started the crack in the Fab Four nonsense and Harry and William’s relationship? Is William so horrible that he can’t abide different thoughts and opinions? So many questions. Plus Mr Lacy is correct. The BRF blew their chance with Meghan. They should’ve dug their claws in her and held on for dear life. I’ve notice the BRF are now doing more appearances with black faces in the crowds. If I’ve noticed, I’m sure other black folks have noticed too. They need to fire their “black people advisor”. He’s failing.

    • lanne says:

      That’s a fascinating comment. What if William really is a monster, and not just the petulant child-man (which is also monstrous, but not dangerous). He wouldn’t be the first monarch with violent tendencies. What if he is actually emotionally abusive? That could be a reason why Kate is so meek and fearful-seeming. It could also be why Willand and Harry had a falling out. If William yelled at Meghan, or acted in a verbally/emotionally abusive way, then Harry would be ready to come to blows with his brother. William has clearly been enabled his whole life, and coddled by everyone around him. That can’t bode well for Kate, or even for their kids. They talked about ME-ghan, but it soulds like William’s the one who’s all about himself. And why wouldn’t he be? This family’s dysfunction could be even darker than we all realize. Think about it: if William were abusive, physically or emotionally or verbally, would the world know it? I’m NOT saying that he’s abusive, by the way. I’m just saying that if he WERE abusive, I don’t believe anything would be done to address the situation. These toxic people would cover it up completely.

      • Carrie says:

        I am not buying into the Kate is meek conjecture after the church debacle. Her behaviour was abhorrent and William was looking at her as though she was the one that needed to be appeased. Kate’s face seemed to convey that if he didn’t support her and go along with the revolting behaviour towards the Sussex’ that she would be spilling a few secrets. They are as bad as each other imo.
        It would have taken one, just one supportive comment during Meghan’s pregnancy to stop a lot of the shit – but no. So much for Ms Advocate of maternal mental health and early childhood. She come across as safeguarding her position as all costs against all comers. She viewed Meghan as a threat and imo was definitely part of the smear campaign to drive M&H away.

      • Nic919 says:

        Kate is like Melania in that they aren’t too different from their husbands character wise. Kate wouldn’t still be with William if she didn’t accept his behaviour. She gets her own way with the low number of engagements compared to all other royals and the very high shopping budget.

      • notasugarhere says:

        I’m not buying Kate as victim either. She’s been in this for twenty years, always gladly stalking him until he was done cheating with the latest woman. She wanted the prize of being the next Princess of Wales, and her own controlling nature gets her what she wants in the end. William’s rage is directed at his brother, his brother’s wife, at his father, the world not loving him in general, etc.

      • Nic919 says:

        Louis would not have been born if William was that abusive to Kate. She wanted a third child, he was open about saying no and then after the dancing dad ski trip, she’s pregnant months later. William has a temper but she still gets what she wants for the most part. Which includes an endless clothing budget and little work requirements.

    • Jane's Wasted Talent says:

      ‘The BRF is angry. They need Harry to help William keep the monarchy going.’

      That this is being discussed so openly is momentous- it feels like it could register on the Richter scale.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        Yeah – this is pretty much saying that William is too weak or inept to keep the institution going on his own, which IS and should be his responsibility as the future future monarch. He shouldn’t be dependent on the 6th in line (and eventually lower in line) for the continued survival of the institution he’s eventually going to be the head of. This is indirectly a scathing assessment of William (and his lack of character and ability).

      • Tessa says:

        I think he just listens to sycophants and the stans who overpraise him and Kate. It has gone to his head. And he has a mean streak also.

    • PrincessK says:

      Well of course, William has been bullying and talking down to Harry for years. In comes Meghan with a bigger IQ than all of them, and William has met more than his match.

  15. Daisyfly says:

    How dare Meghan believe in herself and think she’s worthy of being treated with respect? The nerve of her to expect to be treated like a human being.

  16. Powermoonchrystal says:

    He seems to be less biased towards one side than previous authors, but he still shows his strong chauvinist bias. “She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.” This phrase, if quoted correctly, is BS that many assertive women will recognize. If you have a strong personality and confidence, it will never come across as leadership to some men, it will come across as difficult. Just look at the latest US debate for another example: Biden could get away with calling the orange menace a clown and shutting him up. If Hillary had done the same, it would have been a much bigger scandal with supposedly fair journalists highlighting her freaking likeability

  17. Badgerette86 says:

    Is this any surprise? Confident women are continually feared and villainized by old men in positions of power. It’s how they keep the status quo- confident women are seen as a threat to their toxic (white) male masculinity/power structure. So glad she GTF outta there, but I would totally love to see her roll back in at some point and give no time/zero fucks(and zero protocol and curtesy) to all those in power who did her dirty.

  18. Becks1 says:

    Huh, maybe this book will be more interesting than anticipated.

    I think the line about “dangerous level of self-belief” means it was dangerous to the royal family’s status quo. Meghan didn’t need them to tell her what to do. She knew what she wanted to do.

    I appreciate his other comments about her though – being the only self-made millionaire in the royal family, and how they tried to sideline her almost immediately – yes, she got to travel with the queen, but they really did think she was just going to be happy cutting ribbons for the rest of her life. She was never going to be happy with that. And the line about Harry realizing there was “something rotten” at the heart of royalness – that’s very interesting.

    Based on his comments, it sounds like the Mail really really wanted him to bash Harry and Meghan, and he did, but his portrayal of William (duty? really?) and Charles doesn’t sound that glowing either. And his comments about the Windsors needing to learn to “be woke” – that’s one of the biggest issues facing them right now. They may say “the windsors don’t do woke” but if they refuse to change, they’ll become les and less relevant.

    • S808 says:

      His comments about Charles were interesting. I do think he’s been largely absent— physically and emotionally. Also the part about William thinking he’s “lost”? First hello pot, meet kettle and I hope he expands on that cause lost how?

      • Harper says:

        Charles needs to keep the press on his side because he wants support for his reign. He was absolutely shredded back in the Diana days. He is not going to stick his neck out, period.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        Charles also wants Camilla crowned Queen Consort.

        From what I have read, Camilla could not care less about being Queen Consorts and has a preference to be called “Duchess of Lancaster”. Who really knows what goes on in that crazy family.?

      • Tessa says:

        I always thought Camilla wanted it all. I don’t believe the spin that she never wanted anything. She does IMO. Plus I doubt she’d be sad if she got Queen Consort. The spin was that she’d take a “lesser title” but I think this was just vetted so Charles could get married to Camilla without as much criticism.

      • NotSoSimpleTaylor says:

        The Queen and Philip have long thought Charles has been lost, since the mid 70s. William is only repeating what his grandparents believe. It’s pretty clear that while the Queen won’t fight anything to do regarding sucession, she has a clear preference that Charles is bypassed and William takes the crown. I’ve long believed that The Queen and Philip did more to raise William than Charles and Diana did. Harry seems more like the product of Charles and Diana but William is more a throwback to his grandparents generation or older. I’ve long gotten Czar Nicholas and George V vibes from William.

      • Tessa says:

        I don’t think Philip had much to do with raising the grandchildren. William supposedly had tea with the Queen to have consultations with her. But apparently if she did this, William ignored her and did as he pleased. I doubt she was happy with his rushing to those nightclubs looking worse for wear and the lavish vacations. I don’t think the Queen helped raise William. I think more likely Carole became the “mother figure.” The messages of Charles and Diana’s work ethics and interest in their work apparently was not heeded by William.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Camilla never wanted to marry Charles, either when they were younger or in 2005. But when the former Archbishop of Canterbury is encouraging the match openly, what are you doing to do?

        She mostly gets her own life on the side with her kids and grandkids, spends enough time with Charles to keep him happy. She’s not lusting after being called Queen Consort. I wouldn’t be surprised to see her as Duchess of Lancaster, and her be on a reduced schedule related to her health. She’s not nearly as healthy as Charles.

      • Tessa says:

        I honestly think notsosugar the marriage to Camilla was inevitable when Charles named her and Camilla and APB divorced and she was “free”. I recall her father had some sharp words with Charles and asked what he was going to do about her now. I think the marriage was in the works from that time on. It would take years but it happened. I think she will get Queen Consort. Just a feeling I have. I am disappointed she did not help Meghan instead she and Kate made faces when the minister preached at Harry and Meghan’s wedding.

      • notasugarhere says:

        That may have been Charles’s way of forcing her hand, since she still didn’t want to marry him. She and APB were happy to stay married, with each of them having their side relationships. Charles wanted to marry her, so he named her publicly. After that, Camilla and APB would throw up their hands and he filed for divorce. They’re still great friends, he’s potentially now Anne’s side piece.

        A PR move would be naming her Princess Consort, which makes the monarchy look less sexist. Moving forward it would be King and Princess Consort, or Queen and Prince Consort (like with Victoria and Albert).

      • PrincessK says:

        @ Harper is totally correct. Charles favours William but realises that if he wants to be King and not the last King, he must keep William happy and the price is ditching Harry.

      • Emily says:

        Ooooooh if Camilla became Princess Consort, it would also likely mean that Future Kween Kate becomes Future Princess Consort Kate.

    • Kalana says:

      “Woke” has become a way for people to sneer at being PC because PC was taken over by the rightwing. How dare the royals push themselves onto BIPOC while also sneering at being asked to be “woke.”

      • LOLikes says:

        @NotSoSimpleTaylor Ditto on that Czar Nicholas & Alexandra thingy (moreso Alexandra than Nicholas.) I always feel like Will & Kate act like them and how they were unaware & not in tune with the people & certainly not “woke.” And you know what happened to them! Off with their HEADS :( ((((

    • Couch potato says:

      Based on the rest of this, I think he either said something about “dangerous to the RF” or he’s quoted a courtier, and the Mail put it as his word. I think you’re right, they tried really hard to get shit talk about H&M, and didn’t get much. This is a huge criticism of the RF.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        And it also says a great deal about the Daily Fail playing to their commentariat for clicks$ for revenue$.

    • bluemoonhorse says:

      This is going to be a really interesting read. Meghan had a dangerous level of belief, which the BRF couldn’t suppress like they did Diana in the early years. I think this quote is about how this self-confident woman was never going to be put in her place like Sophie.

    • equality says:

      There is something rotten about thinking you are born special and that others should bow down to you. I could see royalty as a figurehead for a country but I cannot understand bowing down to fellow human beings just for being born.

  19. Carol says:

    They could have had a Bad Bitch. I’m so tired of men describing self confident and intelligent women as “an incredible amount of self belief” as if that is wrong somehow. In men it is praised. Love you, Meghan! Stay you.

  20. Elle says:

    “my faith is greater than my fear” – meghan

    • Love says:

      This has become a mantra of sorts for me. I honestly say it everyday, it’s so beautiful ❤️

  21. SJ Knows says:

    Well good for her!

    I wish all women had her self esteem. I was raised in a family of men and told constantly to be quiet, do as you are told, be a good girl. I’m 59 btw.
    All this prepares a female for is to be a victim, IMO. This is an extremely stupid way to treat anyone, when you get on your own the bigger world will eat you alive.
    Diana was a naive biddable young girl when she married Charles and was tossed onto the world stage.

    Meghan was a full grown adult, who was successful in her own career before she married into The Firm. No small thing to be a self made millionaire before 40 y/o.

    • Shirley Gail says:

      Constantly compared and consistently to one’s detriment. It affects a person to the deepest recesses of their souls. There is a video somewhere of Harry (infant) on mum’s lap, Wm comes over and pretends Harry kicked him, falls down and starts whimpering. It’s OBVIOUS even at 4 he was jealous of Harry. That has never changed. I guess the most positive thing I can say is: at least Wm is consistent.

  22. Amy Bee says:

    I believe Harry and William have not been close for a very long time. I think Harry being in the Army changed him and opened his eyes to a lot things about himself, his family and the country. I think the friction between them was always there because of how they were treated differently especially after his mother died. Meghan coming to his life gave him even more clarity and that clarity caused further friction between him and William. She was not the cause of feud but merely the final straw. Harry has never wanted the life of a royal and this attitude would have caused a strain in his relationship with his family especially Charles and William. He did try to be the dutiful royal but it was never going to work for him. The Army kept him in the family but l think being forced to leave Army magnified his loathing for royal life. Meghan gave him a way out and being with her helped him to see that he can actually have a life outside of the family. I think before he wasn’t sure and also he promised the Queen that he would stay. But the smear campaign , the treatment of Meghan and the lack of protection from the press led Harry finally deciding to take that step away from the family that he always wanted to take.

    • bluemoonhorse says:

      Agree. And going into counseling probably opened his eyes and made him question WTH was going on with his family. I wouldn’t be surprised if counseling revealed to him exactly how non-normal his family is (need to go through the secretary to get to talk to grandma, daddy is never there, off to boarding school when mum died). I mean the Windsors, if you removed their status and wealth, is like a Dickens horror story.

  23. Brit says:

    The reason why Piers, Lady Colin, the BM, RR and some members of the RF don’t like her because she wouldn’t kiss their ass, she’s not giving them access or dropping her lawsuits. Everytime they press harder and think they’ve got her, she comes back stronger and more resilient. I’ve been saying that these people are traumatized because they’ve never encountered anyone like her since Diana but the difference is that Diana fell into that trap of befriending the press. Meghan hasn’t and still hasn’t. They’ve attacked her for virtually everything under the sun and they still don’t know what to do. She’s not scared of them and isn’t easily controlled or manipulated. If anything, they Probably begrudgingly respect her in a way.

    • Amy Bee says:

      Very true. The press thought that if they continued to attack her that she would eventually do like the others have done in the family and give them access. Richard Palmer always complains that Harry and Meghan wouldn’t take advice. The advice was to give an exclusive to someone in the royal rota so that they could get good press. Diana took that advice or at least she felt she had to give access to press in order to defend herself against the press which took Charles’ side. I think Harry knowing that press access only led to more smears against Diana and her death influence how he handled the press especially after marrying Meghan. The press’ approach to Meghan was based on the assumption that because she was from Hollywood that she would court them for attention and good stories and when that didn’t happen, they decided with the help of the Royal Family (who their own motivations to attack her) to smear her into giving them access.

    • Tessa says:

      Diana picked out people from the press like Whitaker to confide in and he was sympathetic to her. Charles and Camilla had their people to confide in like Penny Junor. Diana did this out of necessity. Diana erred in talking to Piers because he seems to have a sense of entitlement about “Diana’s sons.” Harry and William ignore him. But he was looking for an exclusive and I think was bitter after Harry and Meghan did not invite him to their wedding. Colin Campbell is a gossip and though the royals did not care about how she trashed Diana they probably care about the QUeen Mum labeled illegitimate by Campbell. They kept quiet but I think HM and Charles are seething.

    • notasugarhere says:

      Diana happily used the press from Day One. She used to sit on her front stoop and discuss her plans with Whitaker and Edwards, taking their advice on how to work Charles and how to present herself to the media.

      • Tessa says:

        She trusted Whitaker from the get go. He also was one that stayed loyal to her even years after she died. Diana had to be discreet when she dated Charles she would not repeat the same thing her sister did speaking to the press.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Diana had to be discreet because her goal was to land the Prince of Wales, no matter how many lies about herself she told him to achieve that goal. Whitaker and Edwards were her tools and her co-conspirators.

  24. Ms. says:

    To all the women with dangerous self belief. 🥂

  25. Seraphina says:

    I was blown away he stated Meghan is difficult. WOW. It actually made me sick, to label her difficult when all they did was stand up for how they were treated – some may even say bullied – by the press and their own family did not step in to help. And yes, I am sure that her love for Harry made it hurt even more to see him treated the way he is – and know your son will face similar sentiment.
    And the Palace isn’t doing anything to help them reconcile because they DO NOT CARE. DUH.
    Lastly, I applaud Jamaica and Barbados are saying good bye. They see what is going on. KUDOS.

  26. ArtHistorian says:

    I have to say that if the future of the British monarchy is so dependent on the 6th in the line of succession, then Harry is not the problem, it is the instruction itself that is the problem. Any monarchy’s future depends on the monarch, the heir and eventually the direct line of succession. Harry is pretty much out of the direct line of succession since William has produced 3 children.

    This author indirectly saying that the future of the British monarchy depends on Harry to a large degree – he’s pretty much saying that William isn’t up to scratch, that William is the weak link.

    • S808 says:

      Yeah, they really seem to NEED Harry and any properly functioning monarchy should not NEED the 6th in line, especially when there are 2 fully functioning heirs and consorts on deck. This obvious desperation to bring Harry back highlights a much bigger problem imo. Heaven forbid, but if him and Meghan ever divorce I hope he doesn’t go back. They treated him like crap despite needing his presence.

    • ABritGuest says:

      Thanks for this comment ArtHistorian. Saying this is the biggest crisis since the abdication seems so dramatic given they’ve spent all this time telling us that Harry is irrelevant 6th in line& the Cambridges are the perfect future king and queen.

      But when Arthur Edwards did that interview suggesting the press had made mistakes, pleading for Harry to return & saying the Cambridges can’t do it all I realised that they do seem to place a lot importance on Harry considering his position.

      Just makes you think that they really lost control of the smear campaign & clearly never thought HARRY would go. I don’t understand how nobody has been fired for this mess. Even if some royals were behind smears do they have no decent advisors or are they in such a bubble they didn’t think about consequences of alienating Harry?

      • Deering24 says:

        ABritGuest—they thought Harry would suck up any treatment to “do his duty” and play his “make William look good role” forever. That is why these folks feels so betrayed—Harry should have been “loyal” enough to put his role as a William-stabilizing-force above his own life and happiness.

      • Couch potato says:

        You can’t fire the second in line to the throne.

        For me, it’s resembling narcissistic behaviour. I’m not saying anyone is, but the way things have played out, it bears a lot of similarities of a family with a narc member:

        The narcissist treats the family like shit, and one of the members are usually the scape goat (Harry). Noone in the family speaks up, because they don’t want the narcs attention on them. The scape goat is so used to this behaviour, he thinks it’s a normal family dynamic.

        Then the scape goat gets married to a woman who doesn’t tolerate BS behaviour. She knows this isn’t right, and she does’t succumb to the narc. When the narc realizes he don’t have power over the new wife, he’s doing everything in his power to break her. When the scape goat are starting to push back as well, the narc gets even more adamant about breaking her, and breaking up their marriage, so the scape goat are under the narcs control again. With no thoughts of the long time consequenses, because there’s never been consequenses before. The other family members are telling the scape goat and his wife they are unreasonable. The narc has alwas been this way, you just have to tolerate it.

        When the scape goat and his wife decides enough is enough, and go no contact weith the narc, he is completely shocked, and tries every shitty tric to get them back. The family are trying everything to get them back, because with them gone, the narc are turning on them.

        But no, they’re happy without the narc.

      • S808 says:

        “I realised that they do seem to place a lot importance on Harry considering his position.”

        THIS!! He is 6th in line and will only go further back. He will never be king but they seem to give him king like importance while still somehow call him irrelevant????

      • Harper says:

        Harry has all the dirt on the family, and now he’s gone. That is a dangerous situation, and that’s why Harry’s important. If they think Wills is going to be the one to delicately reel Harry & Megs back into the family they are deluded.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        I think the only person who may be able to reel Harry & Meghan back into the BRF to a certain or part-time degree would be Charles.

      • Ginger says:

        I have thought for a while that Harry pretty much carries the monarchy. He is incredibly popular and so beloved. No one really cares for C&C or W&K. People only like the Queen because she has been a monarch for so long.

      • Jane's Wasted Talent says:

        Ginger- Exactly. The modern monarchy is basically a family of hereditary diplomats. Their power is soft power. And Harry and Meghan, with their charismatic natures, have more of this than the others.

    • Couch potato says:

      That’s true! At first I took it for a publisity thing, because they’ve had so much goodwill as ” the two inseparable sons of Dianas”. The courtiers surely know how incompetent Will is, and what a horrible temper he has. They were counting on Harry to be there to cover it up. Harry’s been his brothers whipping boy and chrutch his whole life, and now they’re stuck with Will alone to deal with.

    • Becks1 says:

      I thought that was a really interesting comment too, especially when he said that in 10 years historians will still be talking about it if its not mended soon (I’m taking that to mean when Charles becomes king, the shits going to really hit the fan?)

      We’ve heard snippets over the past year about how bad their relationship is – while we can argue whether they were ever as close as was implied by the press, it does seem obvious that their relationship has deteriorated in recent years, and these comments make clear it wasn’t about William telling Harry to take it easy with “this girl.”

      • Amy Bee says:

        I think William said more than “this girl”. But if they aren’t close, Harry being put off by William’s interfering his life is even more believable.

      • notasugarhere says:

        It wasn’t just William interfering. There was years of the Middletons throwing Pippa at Harry, Kate trying to pick out Harry’s bride once Kate was married in, both W&K using Harry as third wheel to up interest in their engagements, Kate’s inappropriate flirting behavior around Harry, etc.

      • Tessa says:

        It spoke volumes when Harry was seen and the third wheel and not allowed apparently to bring a date. Kate probably did not want that. I saw the rumors in the press about Pippa and Harry being an item (the Midds “tipping off” the press?) and Harry had to deny it. Kate’s flirty behavior with Harry was embarrassing.

      • notasugarhere says:

        She definitely enjoyed being the only female with the two princes. That’s the ongoing theme we keep getting, from the RRs and from the Middleton PR. Harry is welcome to return, tail between his legs, as long as he abandons his wife and son and returns to the BRF (and to Kate).

      • Nic919 says:

        Cressida was with Harry long enough she could have been seen more in public but it’s obvious Kate kept her away. I think he was broken up with Chelsy by the time W and K got married but she as well could have had a more public role but didn’t. The jubilee celebration was particularly bad because Harry paid more attention to Kate than William because he was brushing her off and this was in 2012, one year after their marriage.

    • Seraphina says:

      ArtHisorian, brilliant insightful observation. And oh so true.

    • JT says:

      @Arthistorian I completely agree. I’ve commented before that the language used to describe Harry is that of a king. They’re comparing his leaving to King Edward, saying that Harry has abdicated, but the sixth in line doesn’t a have a throne to abdicate from. They are also describing Meghan in the same way. Ingrid Seward is actively comparing Meg to Philip, a consort and not as the spare’s wife that she is. It explains all of the embiggening of William as of late. He knows that they know he’s the weakest link, which is why he’s jealous of Harry (who has a spine) and trying to downplay Charles’s accomplishments.

    • Nic919 says:

      Agree with you and let’s go a generation back to see how they were talking about Andrew. They weren’t discussing that Andrew needed to be there for Charles in his role as Prince of Wales and future king. The focus was Charles, Diana and the two boys. They were the future. Edward wasn’t even expected to do full time royal work and Anne was in the background doing her thing, but no one discussed how she was essential to the future of the monarchy.

      Harry is in Andrew’s spot and with the three Cambridge kids, there is no need for him to be there. He knows that, but it really does confirm that despite all the bs duty talk, William is lacking. He has a spouse and three kids and he should be all they need. But he’s not even doing a third of what Charles was doing by age 39 and keep in mind Charles had even younger kids when he was that age. William and Kate aren’t cutting it and they have been coddled to remain incredibly lazy.

      The issue was never Harry. It was always William not fully taking up his role despite all the PR and spin pretending that he had.

    • Sid says:

      “This author indirectly saying that the future of the British monarchy depends on Harry to a large degree – he’s pretty much saying that William isn’t up to scratch, that William is the weak link.”

      ITA ArtHistorian, especially to the above. Many of us have our opinions on William being pretty much a layabout with regard to royal work and his attitude towards his role, but we are on the outside looking in. To read similar sentiments (or allusions to such sentiments) from someone who has access to people that deal with William on a regular basis is very telling. It must be really bad for them to want Harry back this much.

  27. CC says:

    I can’t believe he actually wrote that rubbish. This is all “let’s blame the bi-racial woman for the mess” once again. This is getting tiring.

    And he doesn’t want to talk about race in all of this, I guess that’s boring to him.

    Meghan Markle put up with the constant hate and abuse without saying a dam thing for years. Yeah but let’s underhandedly blame her.

    Man that little island really don’t want to acknowledge their racism.

    • BayTampaBay says:

      I think that Meghan is a WOC was used to smear her by the courtiers not because she is a WOC but because she is an strong US American woman. The bi-racial weapon, via a tabloid smear campaign, was the best weapon they had in their arsenal to attempt to control her. However, I could be wrong.

    • Couch potato says:

      He’s not blaming Meghan for the mess here, he’s blaming the RF. And he IS talking about rasism. He’s making it clear, their treatement of Meghan will have long time consequenses for britains relationship with the commonwealth. He’s making it clear she’d been a greate asset to the monarchy, if they hadn’been so damn stupid. This is burning critisism of the RF.

      • Watson says:

        Agreed. He shot all the shots here. The future of the commonwealth is in jeopardy because the royal family just were too dumb to realize what an asset Meg was.

  28. LornM says:

    It really is too bad that the royal family didn’t put in the effort and planning to establish roles for Meghan and Harry that simultaneously made them happy and allowed for the right dynamics between them and William and Kate. As much as everyone says they should have let Meghan “shine”, that would have never worked in the long term and would always have caused acrimony. As much as people hate Kate around here, put yourself in her shoes. She took years of s*** and then you’re going to tell her to step aside or even worse, tell her she could learn a thing or two from the new star. Yeah, that’s not how things work – anyone who has worked in organizational management or who has had to manage a team in a professional setting knows that. Having said that, they should have carved out a role for Meghan and Harry that was meaningful.

    • Beach Dreams says:

      Seriously? Kate only got shit during the dating years—after marrying Will, the press was very easy on her. The media only started to turn on her in 2016 because it was clear at that point that she and William were deliberately avoiding work. She also certainly had nothing substantive to offer in the years she’d been duchess before Meghan arrived. She clearly thought she could and should coast off of a few quick appearances and a myriad of expensive coatdresses. I doubt she got much shit behind the scenes either because she’s exactly what the courtiers wanted out of a consort: dull and happy to hide behind the heir.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Revisionist history. Kate was praised for years as the regular, middle class girl who caught William eye. She only started getting criticized by the press around 2007/8 when it was clear she was doing nothing but waiting for William to give up and marry her.

      • Tessa says:

        there was a story after months and months of Kate not working that the Queen wondered what Kate “did.” Soon after a friend of the Middletons gave Kate a job at Jigsaw where she did not show up much and had very flexible hours. I noticed that and excuse for Kate was that the media bothered her on the way to work. Yet later when she wanted to win back William she used the media for photo ops at clubs to show him what he was missing.

      • windyriver says:

        The much discussed July Tatler article has some sly digs in the graphics that accompany it.

        One graphic is a timeline labeled “The making of a modern princess”. The September 2008 timeline entry notes the press refers to her as “Waity Katy” and reports she’s hanging on for a proposal. The accompanying shot is an actual tabloid page with the headline “…As she tightens her grip on the Prince who tried to dump her, will 2008 see…the triumph of Waity Katy.”

        So yeah, the media criticism was there in 2008.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Which is what I wrote, windyriver. 2007/8 was when the press started criticizing her. Before that, it was mostly positive. But as the years post-grad dragged on, she still wasn’t working, he still wasn’t marrying her? Then some criticism started.

      • windyriver says:

        Yes I know @nota, hence, my last line. It’s a recent confirmation of what you said.

        Meanwhile, the Kate by Numbers graphic in that same article also has some curious shade. Includes: “4 – private flights taken on honeymoon to the Seychelles in 2011″. And: “4.5 million [pounds] – the cost for the refurbishment of Apartment 1A of Kensington Palace, begun in 2011 (2.1 million [pounds] more than Frogmore Cottage for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex in 2019).

    • ABritGuest says:

      The problem is the Firm should have had William & Kate step up before 2017 when they finally became full time working royals. If that had happened & William had had his Earthshot and Kate her garden and HoldStill project etc before Meghan came along then they might have felt secure in their roles & individual achievements & would be less need for the press to smear her which was also used to lift up Kate.

      • LornM says:

        Great point

      • S808 says:

        I agree. That’s another huge problem. They’re so big on hierarchy but had William and Harry working at the same level until very recently, with Harry doing all heavy lifting. That makes no sense. They had William and Harry, and later Kate, working in tandem for WAY too long. There is no reason Harry should’ve been a 3rd wheel to the married heir and future consort. Harry should’ve moved under BP when the Cambridges married and established KP.

      • Sid says:

        “They’re so big on hierarchy but had William and Harry working at the same level until very recently, with Harry doing all heavy lifting.”

        @s808, I wonder if William wanted Harry with him and Kate at KP for that reason. Harry is the one who at least had a track record of ongoing projects he worked on. William didn’t have anything at all at that point. Having things like Sentebale and Invictus seemingly associated with KP was a good look for them, even if both were really Harry’s outside projects.

      • notasugarhere says:

        ABritGuest, that would require W&K to stop being lazy and to start caring about the world around them. It is clear these two only do royal work when absolutely dragged to do so. There is no sense that either of them cares about anything but themselves.

        Meanwhile, Harry found his first charity at 19. Then he went on other big projects like helping Walking with the Wounded, WellChild, InvictusGames, Endeavour Fund. While William sat around, pretending to work as a co-pilot. Doing no work himself but resenting his brother’s success.

    • JT says:

      @Lornm Kate had seven years as the only young female royal to shine. That spotlight was hers for the taking. Kate got shit because she was lazy as hell, which they should’ve seen coming because chica hasn’t accomplished a damn thing her whole life. “Hit the ground running” my ass. Meghan coming along and being successful immediately put the kibosh on any excuses Kate had in regards to her royal work. George came three years into W&K’s marriage, plenty of time for her to establish her royal work beforehand. The RF and press should’ve nipped W&K’s country folk cosplay in the bud immediately; if they had, H&M working wouldn’t have been an issue. There was a void waiting to be filled for far too long, and Meg was there to fill it and then some.

    • Ainsley7 says:

      They did. Making him president and her Vice President of the Queen’s commonwealth trust was their role. It’s basically the same kind of role they gave to Andrew. Andrew was a trade ambassador. It worked out ok until everyone found out he was a literal monster and forced him to step down in 2011. They should have forced him out all together and all that, but he’s not the point. The point is that a role was created for them.

      The main problems came from the Sussexes actually enjoying work and William’s inability to play the long game. Their role didn’t keep them busy enough. So, they wanted more to do. That was painted as them wanting to outshine everyone. Meanwhile, William couldn’t contain his jealousy. The Sussexes were always going to outshine everyone for at least a few years no matter what. Even if Meghan had been more of a Kate, being new made her more interesting. So, it was inevitable that William was going to cause problems. He’s never had any patience. The fact that Harry and Meghan just naturally have more charisma and like working only sped things up.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        I wonder if the Wessexes played any part in this as in “egging” William on and flattering Kate so, that with Andrew out of the picture, Charles would be in a position that he had to utilize them as “Senior Working Royals” to have enough “boots on the ground”

      • windyriver says:

        @Ainsley7 – I agree with the idea that Harry & Meghan’s role appeared to be interacting with the Commonwealth, though not just the Commonwealth Trust. And that made sense, let Will & Kate take the fore front with respect to organizations and events in the UK, where as FFK and FFQC, they would expect to shine in coverage by the BM.

        I don’t think the problem was that Harry & Meghan weren’t busy enough.

        What happened was, they were sent off on a two week commonwealth tour, were unexpectedly hugely popular, and the Firm, and especially William, just couldn’t have that, so that was it for the “commonwealth” plan. We’ve generally agreed here that things fell off a cliff for H&M right after the Oceania tour.

        I also agree that part of Meghan’s attraction was as the new game in town; plus Diana’s other son was getting married, and it was years since a big royal wedding. That newness would have worn off with time and things would have settled down. And if Will and his band of merry courtiers hadn’t worked so assiduously behind the scenes smearing Meghan, she and Harry would have stayed. W&K have sole possession of the field, but it’s an empty victory, because Harry & Meghan are more popular than ever, and out of their reach.

      • notasugarhere says:

        I think the QCT role is something William resents. And really, it should have been something the Queen designated the heir-to-the-heir to do. But she didn’t, she trusted Harry to do it.

    • Nic919 says:

      In any organization where people are rewarded for simply being there longer and not doing the work, the result is a dysfunctional organization which has long term toxic consequences. But of course the BRF is like the Trump Org so merit and ability don’t matter, but driving out the more popular workers will kill morale and that’s what has happened here. The general public doesn’t believe in rank anymore. And outside of blinded sycophants they see what really happened here.

    • Tessa says:

      Kate’s family ethos in my opinion was for the children, daughters particulary, to latch onto a rich and powerful man who would take care of them. At least Pippa did try to earn some sort of a living by writing a book and being more active but ultimately she latched onto a wealthy man to take care of her. Kate and her mother made sure she got in proximity of William. Carole gave William “normalcy.” Kate got the University degree and did not have any work for well over a year and finally the media wondered what she did. Only then did Kate get a part time work with very flexible hours at Jigsaw and it only lasted a year then she moved back in with her parents who claimed she helped at Party Pieces. She had no deadli
      nes and was there when WIlliam called. She also had little self respect.Kate really should have self respect and should have gotten some work instead of waiting for a proposal Diana, a 20 year old was expected to go right to work Kate got all these excuses made for her not working, after the wedding and even before she got pregnant with the first child. she sailed on excuses and had no career to speak of. Meghan did go right to work and was trashed and the Kate stans rewrote history about her employment record.

      • lanne says:

        Her “job” lasted about 3 months. Then she”worked” for her family, but any work they claimed Kate did could actually be attributed to other people. kate did NOTHING for 8 years. No work, no volunteering, no studying, nothing.

        Diana was an aristocrat who didn’t really have to work. She did some part time jobs like babysitting, house cleaning, and preschool teaching, which was just busywork for a girl of her station until she got married. Kate probably couldn’t do that, as she had a “middle class” background, so she could be viewed as a legit working drudge instead of a Sloane Ranger having a work adventure. But there are so many fake socialite jobs she could have taken—and still mingle with the wealthy company the Middletons craved. I don’t understand how a woman can spend her entire 20s doing nothing but waiting for a man to ask her to marry him.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        Well, if Kate had had an actual job she wouldn’t have kept William. The Jigsaw job she got because her family knew the owner – and the owner spoke to the press about Kate’s extremely flexible hours because, and I quote: “dating a high-profile meant that a lot of her life was dictated to her”. Honestly, this sounds very much like William expected that Kate would always be available, even at a short times notice. She couldn’t be perennially available if she had an real job where she couldn’t just jet off on vacation will William at a moment’s notice. This is a huge red flag relationship-wise that shows a complete lack of respect for Kate having any kind of life outside of William. Some guys hate when their SO’s have interest, etc. that isn’t about their boyfriend. Those guys are toxic and I think it is very sad that Kate spent her youth doing nothing in order to hang onto a prince that probably isn’t much of a catch (beyond social status).

      • Tessa says:

        I think it shows too that Kate had no self respect or sense of security. she was not even dating William when she noticed another woman coming on to him and raced across the rooms saying she was William’s girlfriend. William mouthed thank you to Kate as the woman left. This was in one of Kate’s biographies. I found that rather strange. Her mission was to marry William and during the breakup Carole was said to have counseled Kate to show William what he was missing, which led to the weekly photo ops (apparently the press was tipped off) of Kate in shorter skirts being seen with other men at clubs. Even though Kate made sure she was available. the breakup was said to be because William wanted to see other options for girlfriend. Isabella Calthorpe turned him down.

      • notasugarhere says:

        William didn’t direct that, ArtHistorian, it was Kate’s choice. She knew that William of the Wander ing Eye would find someone else, he always does. She and her mother wanted her to be the next Princess of Wales, so they doubled down on kowtowing to William. Their choice.

        With their presumed wealth, they could have created a company or charity for Kate. As they’ve done with the silly marshmallow and cake brother. That would have given Kate the illusion of work, with paid staff to do all the work while she was off vacation with William at a moment’s notice. Instead, they chose a pretend job at Jigsaw that was ‘public’. Of course, that meant the former boss and co-workers were free to talk about how little Kate ever did.

    • equality says:

      The misogyny of the British media should have been dealt with long ago when Sarah and Diana were the victims. Notice that the men who marry into the family don’t have to go through this sort of “hazing”.

      • Tessa says:

        Edo with his ex fiancee and baby did not get criticized. He started dating Bea very soon after the breakup with his fiancee. No talks of his being a fortune hunter or opportunist. Yes there is misogyny.

      • Nic919 says:

        Edo in particular should have been raked over the coals because it is very likely he wasn’t even broken up when he started dating Beatrice. No woman had such a messy past and she wouldn’t be able to get near a male royal with half that baggage.

  29. GuestWho says:

    It really doesn’t seem like anyone over there writing about Meghan sees her as a human being at all. “Mixed-race recruit?” I guess I get what he’s saying – but, seriously…

  30. Lydia says:

    These people. I hope that it all unravels. This miserable, racist family and their minions drove a remarkable woman out because they couldn’t handle her self confidence, intelligence and her skin color. Fools. I wish for Meaghan and Harry’s continued happiness and success in all their endeavors.

  31. Mabs A'Mabbin says:

    Robert Lacey sounds like he has a dangerous amount of self belief. I think he’s under the impression his words have far-reaching impact and wisdom. What he’s got to realize, is that the global community has grown out of any placated need for royals and their hollow existence. And look, I don’t want to get into the whole race thing, but Robert’s an old white guy who is completely out of synch with where the world sees itself forging ahead. His voice is playing out of tune warped 45s and we’ve moved on. It’s the classic age thing.

  32. Case says:

    “She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.” This reminds me of “Nevertheless, she persisted.” Meant to be a put down but it’s actually quite the compliment. May all women have dangerous self-belief.

    Meghan IS a confident woman. She is also intelligent, personable, compassionate, and has great work ethic. I can see how that’s dangerous to the RF who want to sit back, not work too hard, and not shed light on serious issues that need addressing. They lost an wonderful asset in Meghan. I’ll always believe that.

  33. Oh says:

    looooooool they were always saying Harry is irrelevant, nobody cares about him because he is the 6th in line and now they say he is important for the monarchy??? loool Harry is gone forever and he would never ever coming back so enjoy the “”PERFECT REGAL ROYAL””W&K and their children lool

  34. Harla says:

    Yes, I can see how Meghan’s self-belief was incredibly dangerous to all those fragile Windsor male egos, except Harry’s.

  35. What eating you says:

    It’s 2020 and I am so over white men and non black people in general labeling black women “Difficult” of Meghan was difficult in the sense that she knew she self worth and want going to turned into a shell of her former shelf like Kate then sure she was difficult. Also I’m sorry brits but Americans don’t do the self depreciation thing, it not how we’re made. Americas on raised in the belief of the “American dream” and that hard work isn’t a bad thing. Nepotism doesn’t impress us, the people who built themselves up do which is very different from England where the royal and gentry will always be on top and look down on people who rises above there station.

    • LornM says:

      Frankly I think the notion of the “American dream” and individualism is doing us more harm than good at this point. That’s how we got the president we currently have. I think it’s time Americans start thinking about things and people other than themselves.

      • What eating you says:

        I’m sorry @lornm but POC in America have never had the luxury, we’ve been told since birth to pull our selves up by our boot straps in order to “succeed” in life and like another poster said, being a successful person of color already means that you have a dangerous level of self belief because the system was not built for us and is still not for us. POC have always had to look out for ourselves.

      • A says:

        I think what @What’s Eating You is referring to isn’t the American dream wholesale, but rather the parts of it that tell people they can achieve what they strive for. That they aren’t inherently worthless, that the station they were born, or (theoretically) the colour of their skin should ideally never be an impediment to what they hope to accomplish. That they, as persons, have value, that their thoughts and ideas and contributions have value, and that they shouldn’t be discouraged from working towards making their dreams a reality.

        Are there parts of it that are messed up? Yes. As you say, if taken in one extreme, it can definitely make it seem like success or failure is solely up to an individual, not society’s attitudes, which often gives people the leeway to not examine how broader structures set people up for failure. There is an individualism to it that can be damaging. And it’s never intended to be egalitarian, because for so long, only one specific subset of the population were allowed the luxury of the American dream. But the basic premises, that there is hope even when the odds are stacked against you, that needless pessimism and self-deprecation hampers you when you don’t need to be–those things have some value. When you believe you have worth, you believe you have what it takes to accomplish a lot more. Self-deprecation starts you at a negative unnecessarily.

  36. Asking for a friend says:

    From personal experience (though I’m nowhere near as successful as Meghan), to be a successful woman of color in America means you have to have a dangerous level of self belief. It comes with the territory.

  37. Sofia says:

    Lacey’s not a tabloid hack so I don’t think his book is going to be “Sussexes are evil! Poor Queen” type of thing.

    That being said, comments such as a “has a dangerous level of self-belief” and “she is difficult” are not something that makes me want to pick up the book. He’s also (in the past IIRC) has blamed Meghan for Sussexit. This just tells me that while he mentions it’s a battle between brothers, he’ll just make Meghan the driving force of “worsening” it or something and that it was all Meghan’s idea.

    This is probably going to end up being similar to FF but with more details and more emphasis on the royal family as opposed to the courtiers.

    • BayTampaBay says:

      “He’s also (in the past IIRC) has blamed Meghan for Sussexit.”

      Was watching BBC America “The Papers” last night and both working broadsheet journalists commentators on the panel were UK republicans (small “r” republicans). They both stated that Harry has always wanted to leave life as a senior working royal and Meghan gave him the confidence and support to do exactly what he has always wanted to do.

      • Sofia says:

        I am not talking about republicans Bay, I’m talking about the author of the book.

      • BayTampaBay says:

        @Sofia – I understand you were talking about Robert Lacey. I was trying to make the point that there are rational people who believe that Meghan DID NOT cause Sussexit but it may not have happened (Harry stepping down as senior working royal) if Harry married someone else.

        I do not agree with this point but I have heard it made more that a dozen times by several rationally thinking people.

  38. SilentStar says:

    Regarding “dangerous level of self-belief”: I agree, but only in the sense that her confidence and modernity is dangerous to the crumbling facade that is the Royal Family. They are desperately afraid that her refusal to play the game will part the fraying, faded curtain to reveal the truth, that the RF has become an obsolete, irrelevant institution that doesn’t deserve the vast amounts of tax dollars it pointlessly reaps from the public.

    She is a threat to the whole “Royal industrial complex” and its bevy of courtiers, employees and media, who depend on this ongoing charade for their livelihoods.

    The harassment and lashing out against Megan is what it looks like when someone shines a flashlight on a sick, dying, ornery beast that is backed into a corner and knows it can no longer pretend to be powerful.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      Recently a gossip site ranked the European monarchies in terms of what they cost the taxpayers – and the BRF was by far the most expensive! They get 101 million dollars yearly, the next one was the Dutch monarchy as they get about 48 million dollars yearly. The British royals get twice the amount of taxpayer money than the second most expensive monarchy in Europe.

    • booboocita says:

      “She is a threat to the whole “Royal industrial complex” and its bevy of courtiers, employees and media, who depend on this ongoing charade for their livelihoods.”

      @SilentStar – EXACTLY! She’s more of a threat to the Royal industrial complex (great turn of phrase) than she is to the Royal family itself, many of whom — I suspect — would be perfectly happy to retire to the countryside with several million pounds for comfort, raise horses and/or dogs, and live lives of posh, plush, comfortable anonymity while socializing with other rich anonymous English nobility. It’s the grey goblins, trying to perpetuate and protect their positions, who are most up in arms about one small woman with an indomitable will and a heart full of love.

  39. Chartreuse says:

    Once again Meghan is uppity and Harry is hapless and child like and William is the (potential) saviour. These people and their unacknowledged racism is shocking.

    • Kalana says:

      Harry sided with a woman rather than a man?! He must be hapless. Support your brother and money and power. Who cares about your wife. Your wife exists to support you. Even with Diana, they wanted a 20 year old to support her much older husband rather than the other way around.

  40. Melissai says:

    The idea that Harry is a hapless young man is ridiculous. He’s 36 years old, is well traveled and educated. He’s learning more about the world, through his wife. But he’s not a 15 year old who doesn’t know how to make a decision.

  41. A says:

    Oooooh. There is so much in here that I loathe and kind of agree with at turns. I think this person wasn’t intentionally trying to both sides it, but rather, was not happy with what he found when he tried to overturn these stones in the royal family, and is also hemmed in by his own prejudices towards Meghan and an inability to understand why exactly an American, biracial woman would have “an incredible & dangerous level of self-belief.” This straight up ignorance characterizes so much of the way the British tabloid press loathes Meghan.

    At the same time, I think he is apt in what he’s saying the problem with the royal family is. They are not adaptable. They have to be, that is supposedly what has characterized them for so many decades. But that adaptability always comes after a period of incredibly painful situations. They never anticipate these situations with some forethought, and when they do, their focus is always on trivial irrelevant shit, like titles, or curtseying, etc. They adapt only when they’re left with no choice. Otherwise, they are content to keep going as they are.

    The “”Second Elizabethan era”" is helmed by a Queen who, while iconic, is not a visionary. Granted, she has never set out to be one, and she’s always been perfectly content to be “mediocre” as it were. But her mediocrity has been accompanied by an utter lack of compassion and understanding for anyone else’s feelings but her own, as well as a general lack of intellectual curiosity about these things in the first place. It’s her stick-your-head-in-the-sand ostrich behaviour writ large. She will never care what other people do or say unless she is forced to, and usually she is forced to because her job security depends upon it. Otherwise? Ya’ll can go eff yourselves is probably how she thinks of things.

    So when this author is saying “an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief”, while that’s a fucking stupid thing to say, I do think the criticism he levels towards the royal machine is apt. They should have worked with her. Their lack of insight as to how the outside world is treating her is something that fucked them over. They could have overcome this if, again, they had some sense of awareness and understanding for how other people feel and operate, but their ignorance of what pretty much everyone else would call basic human decency is what is going to be their downfall.

    But of course, because of the way he worded it, this one line of his is going to dominate the news cycles. It’s given a clarion call to all the racist fucks who think precisely the thing this thought expresses–how dare an American, biracial woman have any sort of self-esteem whatsoever. Who gave her the fucking right to ever feel good about herself? Doesn’t she know that this is only to be arbitrated by the tabloid media? That she will be TOLD how much she is worth by them and the rest of society, and until she is told, she is to assume she has none at all?

    I won’t chalk this up to any kind of societal malaise on the part of the British, because people will come at me for like, generalizing too much. But I’ve always kind of figured that the way British culture almost prides itself on self-deprecation is something worth examining. It’s such a hallmark of British humour in general. You watch the UK version of The Office, for example, and you’re supposed to laugh because as bad as your life is, at least it’s not as bad as the one lived by these characters. The American version, on the other hand, portrays Michael Scott as a shit boss, but a loveable underdog. Maybe it is a cultural difference, I don’t know, and I won’t say that attitude is bad as a whole–but I do think it has its ugly sides, and this is one of them.

  42. Watson says:

    I think a lot of his comments are accurate. They were afraid of a Diana 2.0. And what they got was someone far more terrifying: someone with star power, with the added horror of real world experience, and confidence. They didn’t want a fully formed woman, they wanted a puppet.

    Poor Harry. Always the spare, treated like the fall guy. I hope he never goes back for his mental health.

    • booboocita says:

      Star power, real world experience, confidence, and a hella good education. Attractiveness, stylishness, a modern and progressive outlook, and love and support from a man she adores. Good gravy — she was going to be lethal to the BRF no matter what she did. What a shame the BRF couldn’t see past her skin tone. It’s been said before, but I’ll say it again: they coulda had a bad bitch.

    • fluffy_bunny says:

      Don’t worry. Harry’s never going back. They’ve assured that he will forever turn his back on them.

  43. Linda says:

    Definitely buying this book.

  44. Lunasf17 says:

    How is the British Royal family even an institute? Seriously, what purpose do any of these people serve?! All of this is so out of touch and a waste of resources.

  45. Mignionette says:

    This isn’t even dog whistling at this stage.

    He virtually said ‘how dare this bi-racial american woman not know here place’.

    It makes me happy every time this family use their mouthpieces to put out these shitty messages, because they increasingly show how out of touch and irrelevant they are.

    Before Meghan I was indifferent to the monarchy bar Diana (who was flawed but beautifully human). Now I just want them gone gone gone.

    They are a scourge on the public purse and a huge part of the puzzle of societal structural inequality and racism.

  46. Valiantly Varnished says:

    “dangerous level of self-belief” in other words, “How dare this black woman have self-esteem and a sense of self-worth!”

  47. Nyro says:

    They had no idea who Meghan is or what she comes from. This is Doria’s daughter. And I know Meghan got the same talk from her black mama that all of us with black mama’s did. Nobody is hated and feared like black woman who knows herself and shines in everything she does. That whole family is beneath her and they know it. And they know that she knows it, which is what really angers them.

    And it’s clear just how DOA the royals are without Harry. It is Harry who is the key to the kingdom. They know Baldy’s a dull, dimwitted, lazy ass hothead who can’t hack it. They know it. This whole book sounds like it’s gonna be one long plea for Harry to come home. Because that’s what it ultimately means when he says they must “fix the rift” and “save the monarchy”. It’s all dependent upon ” irrelevant” Harry. Now isn’t that interesting?

    • JT says:

      @Nyro I agree. The amount of pressure they put on Harry is insane. I wonder what goes through his head when they’ve been calling him irrelevant his entire life, but at the same time saying he is indispensable to the monarchy, and the U.K., and the commonwealth. It must be one hell of a mindfuck. There has never been this much pressure on Will ever. Even Meghan has more pressure put upon her than Kate who, lets face it, only gets told to pop out a kid and put on a coat dress. To be taken for granted as the spare (which is fucked up thing to call anyone) and then be told how important you are when you are fed up and leave must be infuriating. Having a woman who put him first and calls him amazing must of been truly groundbreaking for him. This isn’t hyperbole in my part in saying this; Meghan making him a priority and treating him like a king must have really changed him. Poor guy. That family is straight up abusive to the core.

      • Nyro says:

        It’s very abusive. His entire life, he’s been seen as irrelevant, stupid, a joke, William’s whipping boy, etc. Both by his family and reporters/general public. And yet it’s the supposed irrelevant stupid joke who’s got everything required to keep the monarchy alive in the 21st century. Yes, it must feel awful to have a family who tells you that you’re nothing when they really know that you are everything. I hope he never goes back. Let them suffer. If the monarchy dies, it dies.

    • cc says:

      Well I guess the only thing that can help them now are the kids.

  48. Lululu says:

    Well, how dare an intelligent, educated black woman have vision, drive, confidence, and speak her mind?

    It’s like the commentators are trying to one-up each other with their smears. It reads as thirsty to me.

  49. fluffy_bunny says:

    I always love when you include the picture of Harry’s murder face where he looks like he wants to knock William’s teeth down his throat. It just clearly illustrates how done with the RF Harry was.

  50. MerryGirl says:

    William has the duty gene and yet he is so lazy? Harry is the one who the Queen felt confident to send out on solo tours throughout the Commonwealth and in their short time together Harry & Meghan’s tours to Australia, New Zealand, Oceana, Morocco and South Africa did more to bring young an interested audience who would not normally pay attention to the Royal Family.

    All this bashing from these UK media, courtiers and authors trying to sell books will not stop the fact that the RF has lost it’s best chance to remain relevant in this changing world.

  51. Krystina says:

    “She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief”
    I understood what he meant by that:
    To the Monarchy, which isn’t exactly known for endorsing self-belief, etc., in their minds it was dangerous to them.
    Sorry, not enough coffee today, so I’ve no idea if that makes sense.

  52. Lizzie says:

    Thinking over the dangerous self confidence comment, I think he is saying she is self confident but doesn’t have the goods to back up the self confidence. I think she has proven she does -let’s say by 100 million times. At least Netflix thinks so.

    • BayTampaBay says:

      @Lizzie – I think Robert Lacey is saying that a large degree of self-belief is a dangerous thing to have if you are a Senior Member of the BRF if you hope the survive let alone thrive.

      Diana was “Exhibit A” of a person with a degree of self-belief that was dangerous for BRF.

  53. Atti says:

    I dont know how anyone can see her as anything but impressive and genuine. Well, I see hoooow…

  54. Tessa says:

    william’s ugly expressions around Meghan says it all. Very rude.

  55. GreenTea says:

    I was going to purchase Robert Lacey’s book when released, but his comments about Meghan have changed my mind…

  56. equality says:

    If Will sees Charles as a lost cause why is he trying to trade on his passions like the environment?

    • Kalana says:

      William can’t put his arms around his brother anymore but still copies Harry and Meghan at every turn. Being disapproving is a way for William to puff himself up.

  57. Jezebel's Lacefront says:

    “She’s an uppity black woman and we can’t have that, shall we?”

    That’s the literal translation. How sad are these people? Well, I guess I’m uppity too since I refuse to grovel.

  58. BnLurkN4eva says:

    Then if being self-confident is dangerous, I hope all women work on their confidence then perhaps we can do something about this disaster of world that men have been leading for centuries. I hope Meghan considers this a compliment and keep on being dangerous and difficult.

    • booboocita says:

      All of the countries that have managed to tame or eliminate COVID-19 have women as their heads of government/state: New Zealand, Germany, Taiwan, Finland, Norway, Denmark, and Iceland. It’s painfully obvious that this planet needs more bad bitches who are dangerously self-confident and difficult.

  59. Lola says:

    Disgusting misogyny and sexism. I’m boiling right now.

  60. Elizabeth says:

    Frankly this is a badge of honor for Meghan. She was indestructible. She never surrendered.

    How rude and unbelievably hubristic of this well-off old white man who married into the lower rungs of the aristocracy to think he has the right to speak on what a young Black woman’s life is like or how she chose to live it. He has no right and he has no idea. “Mixed-race recruit” is so demeaning and he probably doesn’t even realize it. Meghan is a human being with her own life. She’s not your token to trot out as an apology for imperial massacres and endless looting.

  61. Intheknow says:

    If (other) people knew how much strength it takes to ‘survive’ as a black woman in this world, especially if you don’t have money and privilege; and how much more it takes to have unshakable confidence…indeed, I can **see** why they’d think it was ‘dangerous’ to be so confident. They fear losing control and power. They are losing control and power and if black people and especially black women were given half a chance, we’d change the world and truly dismantle the patriarchy vs pretending to change the patriarchy.

    I need a nice cup of chamomille tea and some chocolate.

  62. Julia K. says:

    As a mother of 2 successful and confident daughters and granny to 4 young ladies who are superbly educated, confident , and with great sense of self belief, I cannot believe anyone would call them difficult and dangerous. I am outraged. Would anyone call my grandson dangerous because he was also encouraged to believe in himself?

  63. MJM says:

    BS. Complete and utter BS.

    William has the lazy, not duty, gene.

    William and Kate are lazy, entitled and jealous and the difficult ones NOT Meghan who took her role seriously and acted in good faith.

    No one has the moral courage to acknowledge who the real problematic people are. Harry and Meghan are the only ones that are good.

  64. Marigold says:

    My first thought when reading that statement was, “Yes, when a woman has confidence and self-esteem she’s earned through a life of doing good and doing well, it’s very often considered ‘dangerous’ by all the men around her.”

    But then I kept reading, and I don’t think he meant that at all. I don’t think it was at all a disparagement of her. I think her confidence and independence was VERY dangerous to the royal status quo, and that’s a huge part of the reason they so roundly hounded her out of the country.

    He’s right.

    I also think the little quotes here are all fair. They ALL come off as entitled on occasion, and the Sussexes ARE very wealthy people with imperfections and quirks of their own. All people of tremendous wealth and power will struggle with entitlement. It comes with the territory. They need not be bad people or unworthy people to have it pointed out from time to time.

  65. Marivic says:

    The BM always forget that Meghan and PHarry did not want to leave the Royal Family completely. Because of too much vile and unfounded lies by the BM, courtiers, and the RF themselves, they wanted to step back from their senior roles and proposed a half in half out arrangement so they could still serve the Queen. But the Queen, with the protestations of William, did not agree and sent them packing. Now they lost the real stars of the RF.

  66. 2cents says:

    “ What you’ve got to realise is that the whole strategy of the monarchy was based on them (the brothers) sticking together. Meghan changed all that. She is difficult. She has an incredible and dangerous level of self-belief.”

    What a disappointing quote by Robert Lacey, in a tabloid of all places!! Blaming Meghan for splitting up the brothers, when in truth the cohesion between the brothers was always fragile behind their public image.

    This blame echoes the classic, deep British trauma that high profile British’ males are being ‘dragged’ from their rightful paths by ‘mean’ foreign women (remember Wallis Simpson and Yoko Ono..?). This is the ‘fallen-hero-complex’ suffered by the bullying British tabloids and so many royal rota reporters since Sussexit.

    Truth is William and Harry’s relationship has been negatively affected by their parents’ dramatic power struggle (hopefully visible in the next episode of the Crown). And consequently we see the inevitable split of William continuing his father’s path and Harry following his mother’s humanitarian path outside of the royal system. This split along these lines was always there, hidden, denied and neglected by the Firm for decades.

    • Tessa says:

      I think the negativity of william and harry’s relationship came from the spin about the Golden Prince Vs. The Bad Prince and Harry thrown under a bus. After years and years of this I think Harry got fed up. William also probably behind the scenes was rather unpleasant to Harry and trying to push him around. He also made some snide remarks about Harry
      publicly. I think Harry also followed his father path as far as work ethic is concerned and his mother’s as humanitarian. William has little work ethic and no passion or interest in his parents’ causes but he also seems to me very cold and manipulative.

      • 2cents says:

        You may have a point that Harry combines the best characteristics of Diana and Charles.
        He is the first spare who managed to leave the royal nest and (together with his wife) create a new successful life for his happy Sussexfamily outside in the real world. I find it hard to qualify William. Only if he accepts Harry’s new position, a process of healing and cooperation between the brothers can begin. Time will tell!

  67. NotSoSocialButterfly says:

    Because god forbid any black woman should show self-confidence and know her worth. 😒

  68. Productivity at 31% says:

    Get rid of all of them. They’re all grifters/freeloaders. What the UK and Commonwealth countries couldn’t achieve without these pointless, unelected “leaders” and their 370 million pound palace upgrades! Cultural value? The UK’s museums, pubs, ambiance, unique Englishness, beautiful countryside, and history are the reasons to visit the region, not the royals.

  69. Marni112 says:

    Robert Lacey wrote a defining history about the Saudi royals so he is no hack…he presents the current BRF story with both sides as having blame.

    Sorry that is what serious historians do.

    • ABritGuest says:

      Hmm he may be a respected historian but he’s still a privileged white guy who so far doesn’t seem to acknowledge factor race may have played in all of this. I remember when the January announcement came he tried to be very dismissive of black brit singer Jamelia’s comments on race but thankfully she was firm.

      Extract I read so far where he suggests fictional Rachel Zane and her dad were in the room during Sandringham summit reads as bad as any other royal fan fiction. Not sure if it’s the Fail’s editorialising to blame but also says Archie is 8th in line not 7th which isn’t great for a royal historian & has details of when Charles met Archie for first time wrong as he was on tour in Germany.

      Back to ArtHistorian’s point above& Robert Lacey’s comment on the impact on the monarchy, Arthur Edwards has another article hoping Harry comes back& the ex head of the British army wrote a letter in a tabloid for Harry to come back to royal duties& that the military will miss him. Officially insane when you have the next two heads of the armed forces right there.

    • Jane's Wasted Talent says:

      He is/was a popular historian, not a serious one. Even regarding the Saudis, his information was not new.

  70. Becks1 says:

    Successful as in, does her work, has raised two seemingly well-adjusted children, stable marriage, etc.

  71. Seraphina says:

    I was not aware QL is not very well liked in Spain.

  72. notasugarhere says:

    Letizia is not ‘completely disliked in Spain’. She’s disliked by a tiny handful of old-school royalists, who thought a taxi-driver’s granddaughter wasn’t good enough to marry a future king. They’re led by a tabloid hack, Penifel, who has attacked Letizia endlessly for 15 years.

    Those types of idiots believe in ‘blue blood’ and support Sophia, no matter how abusive and dangerous she is, because she’s a ‘blood royal’. Supported Criminal Cristina and Inaki, support Sophia manhandling the heirs to the throne for a photo op. Those Letizia haters are equivalent to the handful of Meghan haters who posts under multiple names. They do not represent the majority of the population.