To me, some of the biggest celebrities in America are the chefs and designers on the Food Network, the Cooking Channel and HGTV. I watch all of that kind of programming, especially in the past four years when I needed to decompress. I’ve always been a big Ina Garten fan – she films her cooking show from her gorgeous Hamptons home, with its perfect kitchen. I want to live Ina’s life, with a husband who is away for most of the week, and lots of friends and card games and drinking and eating. But I also want the life of OG cook/lifestyle maven Martha Stewart. Martha’s post-prison life has been nothing but brilliance. She barely even had to change up her branding – she’s still the same amazing woman with amazing homes, amazing kitchens, dogs, horses and chickens. She just seems more fun now, hanging out with Snoop and smoking blunts and what have you. So… if you had to choose between Martha and Ina, who would you rather drink with?
America has made up its mind: There’s going to be cocktails. And the country, seemingly, would rather have them with Martha Stewart than Ina Garten. This, per a survey performed by Bacardi to coincide with the start of the holiday season.
According to them, it’s not even close: 78 percent of Americans say they’d rather take a tipple with Stewart, 79, over the Barefoot Contessa, 72.
Perhaps it has something to do Stewart’s late-career street cred, what with her close friendship with Snoop Dogg, CBD line and summer thirst-trap pool selfies. Or maybe it’s just that Stewart, like many an average American, has been caught Instagramming while tipsy — relatable!
A third candidate unfortunately not included in the survey was “The Orchid Thief” author Susan Orlean, she of the Friday night drunk-tweeting spree. One day, Susan.
In July, author Susan Orlean got drunk as a skunk and live-tweeted for hours in what was one of the funniest moments of 2020. I wouldn’t mind drinking with any of these women, honestly. Martha seems like she would be so much fun, like she would drunkenly suggest that we go play with her horses. Ina would get drunk and want to play cards, and she would drunk-dial her gay dude friends and beg them to come over. Why not get drunk with all three women? WHY CHOOSE?
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Instagram.