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Stephen King’s Stand By Me is turning thirty-five years old this year. To commemorate the cult classic, directed by Rob Reiner, Stand By Me is being rereleased in theaters this week. Former child star Wil Wheaton has been speaking about his experience making the film at 14. Will, who is estranged from his parents, recently told Yahoo! about how being forced into acting caused trauma. Wheaton also discussed how the abuse and neglect that he received from his parents informed his character, Gordie, who was dealing with emotionally distant parents after the death of his older brother. Below are a few highlights from Yahoo!:
“I didn’t want to be an actor when I was a kid. My parents forced me to do it, my mother made me do it. My mother coached me to go into her agency and tell the children’s agent, ‘I want to do what mommy does,’” Wheaton tells us in a new interview (watch above) about growing up in Burbank, Calif., with mother Debra, an actress, and father Richard, a medical specialist. (Yahoo was unable to reach Wheaton’s parents for comment.) “And through a combination of an incredible emotional abuse from my father and a lot of manipulation, using me, from my mother, it really put me in that place.”
Wheaton, now 48, and estranged from his parents, says the distress he endured at the time fueled his performance of a kid dealing with emotionally distant, negligent parents reeling from the death of his older teen brother (John Cusack).
“[It] put me in exactly the right place to play Gordie,” he says. “Because Gordie’s experience very much reflected my experience. We’re both invisible in our homes. We both have a brother who is the golden child. We’re both the scapegoat in the family. So when I watch Stand by Me now, I cannot ignore the unbelievable sadness in my eyes. And I cannot ignore the reality that it was that sadness, that isolation that I think gave me what Gordie needed to come to life and I think Rob Reiner saw that.”
I didn’t even know Wil was still acting because I never watched Big Bang Theory. Stand By Me was one of my favorite movies in 1986. It was where I first fell in love with River Phoenix. I was heartbroken when River died several years later. Wil’s character, Gordie, was also relatable and Wil was also a hottie. I’m sad to read that Wil was going through abuse at that time from his parents. Your teens years are already chaotic and I am sure it was even more stressful for him because he was in the spotlight. I love how Wil was able to connect what he was going through in real life to his character and could use his pain to give his character depth. I love that Will said he wanted to be an writer like Gordie. He also recognized that each of his costars was an embodiment of their character in Stand By Me. It has been lovely to see celebrities open up about their mental health journeys. I believe the more high profile people up about their mental health, the more the public will too. Sometimes we just need the behavior modeled for us. I definitely will be re-watching Stand By Me. I think it has been more than thirty years since I last saw it.
photos credit: Getty, Avalon.red and via Instagram
we watched stand by Me with my stepson last year. it was both mine and his first time watching it. I was stunned by what a good movie it is.
I remember his turn as Wesley Crusher on the Star Trek revival in the late 80s—AND the amount of vitriol he endured for years from some dumba— trekkies who decided they ‘hated’ his character. Before the era of social media, but way too much for a teenager to deal with. We don’t talk enough about the group psychosis of toxic fandoms.
absolutely – I’ve been binging tng during the pandemic and as a first-time viewer I don’t get the hate for his character – he’s just a kid who reliably saves the day? what’s the problem? I’m gonna speak sacrilege here but Q, the fan fave, is waaay more annoying.
you have to wonder whether some trekkies made a virtue out of disliking the kid because the adult characters dismissed him in the early episodes (and perhaps some trekkies identified a little too closely with his keener, outsider status)
I remember that too. That poor guy got SO much fandom abuse for that character, and I’m not sure he’s ever really recovered from it.
Yes, the fandom can be so toxic to child actors. People were so awful toward a kid.
@ElleV yeah, Q is an AH and the writers had really no idea what to do with this character except dropping him in an episode every so often for no reason at all. Wes was a bit of an annoying know it all, but definitely not that bad and he didn’t deserve the hatred of full-grown adults jealous that he was cast in their dream show and not them. You are supposed to be fans, why send death threats to actors?!?!
I didn’t know about the vitriol but he was my main reason for watching Next Generation. Was I even a bonafide geek before Wil Wheaton made me one? I’ll never know.
@ElleV the problem with Wesley wasn’t the acting. He was a writer’s crutch, much like their technobabble (which they later toned down). He saved the day via Deus Ex Machina as much as anything, which is unsatisfying, narratively. It’s sad that “fans” gave him so much grief for it though. If they had complaints they were misdirected.
Haha Bettyrose – SAME! I pretty much exclusively watched TNG for Wesley Crusher and I’m not ashamed to admit it.
I remember watching Stand By Me as a kid (just a few years younger than WW) and even then I thought he was a terrific actor – I really believed in his pain; his eyes spoke volumes. He and River Phoenix were absolutely the break out stars in that movie. As an adult, and hearing about the actual pain he was suffering IRL, it makes me question every film I’ve ever seen with a talented kid actor. What is being/has been done to them to elicit that response?
@Anners & BettyRose lol i can definitely see young me having a crush on Wes
@Jay – interesting point! i wonder if part of the reason why I don’t mind him so much because i’m coming to the show later and it’s such a beautiful gem of a certain era of television, so even the weak episodes and the obvious tropes and crutches are charming and funny, and I can just move along to a better episode immediately
@Arpeggi – I never considered that there might be some entitlement like ‘how is he on the show and I’m not’ – funny and sad
thanks all for giving me a chance to talk trek – not many of my friends are into it but i am OBSESSED
He was a Mary sue. Not his fault, it was the fault of the writers
I was young enough that I thought he was cute and so while I am a Trekkie, I did not hate Wesley crusher. And I was disappointed he left the show but when he did return he got a few good episodes to work with (the one about the illegal manoeuvre during a starfleet academy exercise was one of them) . Also this was before the internet was really a thing and we were just dealing with dial up modems and listserves so it was mostly angry older men who disliked his character. There were plenty of bad Star Trek characters out there. (The ferenghi were mostly sexist jerks) and with over 20 episodes per season, not all of them were classics.
And while I can’t say that I disliked Q as a character, I do admit that many of his episodes just weren’t good. The Robin Hood one was particularly useless. Although I guess it is a classic in a “bad trek episode” kind of way. They redeemed his character with the series finale though.
@alissa A definite classic and one of the best Stephen King adaptations imo. It’s a favorite of my husband’s and if it’s on he’s watching it. And now knowing this about Wil his performance takes on a whole new meaning.
Wow I never knew this, how awful. I’m a huge TBBT fan so yeah, he was reoccurring in that. I liked him in it.
Massive Big Bang fan here and I loved Will in it. His and Sheldon’s frenemy thing was fun to watch.
Sigh, I miss that show…
Me too Sierra!
The Wil Wheaton Dungeons and Dragon party episode with Joe Manganiello, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, William Shatner, and Kevin Smith!
The episode where Will gets hired as the new Professor Proton and has Howard on as a guest. Then he proceeds to ask Sheldon if Amy would want to come on as guest 😂
@Lightpurple: that one WAS amazing LOL
Will was also supposed to celabrate the wedding but Mark Hamill did it I was dying XD
@Lightpurple – that is one of my favorite episodes. The last photo at the end where Kareem’s upper body is cut off cracks me up every time. It made me wonder how often that happens to him IRL. LOL
@Sierra: I just watched that episode last night lol
@spankieb that picture absolutely killed me when I saw that episode for the first time and having tiny Bernadette stand next to him was genius. I still laugh every time I see that picture
I LOVE Stand By Me!!! It was so good. Entertaining, fun, thoughtful and representative of growing up and becoming who you are. 35 years old. God, I’m old.
I’m 58 and I have loved that story since it first came out, so I know older, you are not old!!
I am beginning to really not like society anymore. No one has a right to abuse a child publicly or an adult publicly, unless it’s someone from the GOP or ex-presidents. They deserve any and all threats, but they don’t care when the Democrats received death threats!
But what Wil Wheaton went through is unforgivable and reprehensible! And anyone who has gone on to cause him harm should all crawl under a rock never to be seen or heard from again. But after they apologize first!!
I love this general outpouring of childhood trauma. Harry, Wil… people are owning their own vulnerability and suffering, showing it bravely to the world. It’s beautiful to see. Makes me feel less alone and more validated in my own suffering
I agree Nina! I’m estranged from my mother because of her horrible narcissistic abuse of me all my life. It does me good to hear others talk more openly about estrangement. And the kind of abuse children endure behind closed doors with manipulative, lying, self-serving narcissist parents. We are not alone.
Yep hearing Will use the terminology golden child made me wonder if his parents had narcissistic personality disorder. Very familiar to me too. Im estranged as well, youre not alone
Love Wil Wheaton. One of my favorite movies as a teenager was Toy Soldiers, with Wil and Sean Austin. I also cry every time I watch Stand By Me.
I love love love Toy Soldiers too!
I love Stand by me. To me it is one of the best Stephen King book with Misery and IT: so atipycal so on point, I loved it.
The movie is great, but all of those kids suffered the consequences of being child star, it’s painful.
And honestly I think kids should be kids, and should be protected.
I love those too, and ‘Salem’s lot.
But my favourite has to be The Stand (to keep it this way I’ve never, and never will, watch any of the tv adaptations).
I still mourn Nick.
SBM, was where I first discovered Kiefer Sutherland. Then The Lost Boys, and I still think he’s hot as hell.
Yeah Salem’s lot too was great.
Those are the best King’s books.
The 90s adaptation of the stand is a fun watch and it’s pretty accurate to the book. It’s pretty low budget, but has a lot of name actors—Gary sinise as Stu Redman was the best, seconded by Ruby Dee as Abagail and Ossie Davis as the Judge. Randall Flagg is laughably bad and low budget, rob lowe is miscast as Nick—too pretty. But the bad parts are bad in a good way—Larry’s “can you dig your man” is howlingly bad as a song, the special effects are silly, and Stephen king makes a cameo. He’s awful as an actor but fun to see. Other fun, and good cameos: Kareem Abdul jabbar, Ed Harris, and Kathy Bates.
I enjoyed it. The cheap quality of the production design takes away the terror, and it becomes more of an adventure story, a comforting adventure if you have read the book and already know how it ends. Oh yeah, trash can man is ridiculous. But the whole miniseries feels very earnest, like everyone is trying really, really hard. It was kind of endearing, which is not what I would expect from the most horrifying of Stephen kings novels. There were a lot of awww moments for me. (Mother abagail: you all come and see me with all of your friends!)
Gary Sinise will *always* be Stu Redman for me. And Laura San Giacomo was the perfect Nadine. I loved (most) of the casting of that movie…Rob Lowe was horrifically miscast. They never ever do the Trashcan Man justice and his character was one of the best (by which I mean most disturbing) in the book.
Will Wheaton has been very open about his mental health issues on social media for years, he just very rarely makes it into the more mainstream entertainment news. He’s not only open about his own struggles but he’s also interacting with people who write to him about their own mental health issues.
Yes, he has. He & Jenny Lawson(the Bloggess) are friends and his name has come up different times over the years on her site. Good video of him discussing his GAD-video from 2015. It’s good seeing him more in the mainstream news.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6ACzT6PCDw
Yeah I’ve seen her talk about WW on her blog, along with BEYONCE THE GIANT METAL CHICKEN
KNOCK KNOCK MOTHER F#CKER
I love JL’s stories(and books)..the Beyonce Metal Chicken one is epic. I told my husband when that post came out that he couldn’t tell me not to buy new towels because I might come home with a metal chicken. He said, “Okay.”.
Was always a fan of his and he has been estranged from his parents for years. He’s been open about his struggles for years and am glad he’s in a better place.
All the best to him, esp for speaking out about how child actors are put under sooo much pressure from their parents. When i read stories like this I always think of Millie Bobby Brown and the stories of her very very pushy father.
Plus the Olsen twins..
The Coreys.
Ah the Coreys – what happened to Haim esp was very sad.
The full article actually has something on Corey Feldman. Wil said Corey was a “pain in the ass” during filming and eventually Wil asked Rob Reiner why he’d cast him. Rob said, “There was no other actor who was as angry as Corey was. And [the character] Teddy is filled with anger and rage.”
I’m glad the kids basically remember the experience of the movie as being a good one, but it’s painful to realize part of the reason why it was so affecting was because Hollywood was eating the pain it had already inflicted on these kids.
And Wil’s right — the sadness in his eyes was always the thing I found most haunting about that movie.
Li Lo
Right after Stand By Me, Wil went to Star Trek: The Next Generation, where he played Wesley Crusher (the doctor’s son) for 4 years. And then he left LA to work for a tech firm in Kansas (?). He’s been acting and doing voice-over work (as well as other ventures) all this time, and he’s written about his parents’ abuse in his blog.
He also does audible books and he is an excellent story teller! He is the voice of Ready Player One and Two.
At this point, I’m worried about all child actors.
So many bad stories have come up in the last years. Wil himself seems fine now, but too many have fallen into drugs, or even died (overdoses, suicides), and all the stories about sexual abuse… There needs to be more talk of this.
I agree. I seriously side eye any parent who lets their child enter the “business”.
Especially the ones where it’s a child crying?
Or a crying baby?
Like, that child is actually really crying, really scared.
Who would let their child go through that?
Even in Downtown, little George was crying in a scene, and that child was wailing. What kind of parent does that?
Kids aren’t “resilient”, we know thus because of all the stories they tell us later in life, of the trauma they endure. Like Wil here.
It’s so awful and sad.
Corey Feldman as spoken for decades about “the system” and the abused he saw and suffered, but I think for the industry it’s easier to threat him like a joke.
Corey Feldman appears messed up, but I think it’s the abuse that did this to him.
So he’s treated as a joke.
He can come off as weird and he is acting up a bit, but I honestly think he’s not lying.
How they swept Feldman’s story about Heim under the rug, ffs. The allegations about Charlie Sheen were dismissed by Sheen, saying “listen to Heim’s family that I’m not guilty”, but when you see how Heim’s sister dismissed them (“he was dating me, surely he wasn’t into my brother”) and what was said by Heim’s mom (“my son told me everything, he would have told me if he was raped”), it’s all such a red flag.
Not to mention two of the child actors that spoke in Feldman’s documentary were dead by the time it came out (one alcohol poisoning and one overdose or suicide, I forgot).
Parents, keep your kids out of Hollywood.
Mara Wilson, who was in Matilda and Mrs. Doubtfire, and actually enjoyed being a child actress (although she admits to weird side effects), wrote an amazing article for Cracked called 7 Reasons Child Stars Go Crazy. It’s an incredible piece, despite the flippant title: she breaks down the psychology of filming a movie, or having bosses that can contradict your parents, or how many of these kids are more or less trapped because their parents are their managers, publicists, and financial dependents. It was such an eye-opener for me about the abuse that goes on that isn’t perceived as abuse, or the inherently addictive qualities to a child of being love-bombed by cast and crew, only for it all to go away when filming ends.
I read that as well, it was really interesting.
It’s really sad when kids are pushed into it by their parents, and then responsible for the families income. That can’t be healthy in any way. There are a few child actors who had decent parents and good support who have done ok, but even they have probably been subject to a lot of abuses they didn’t need to.
I agree. It’s always been horribly exploitative, going all the way back to Jackie Coogan in the 1920s.
Because his parents robbed him of all the money he made as a child actor, California passed certain laws to protect child actor earnings, but abusive parents still find ways around that.
Yep. I also thought of Jackie Coogan. And so many of the young stars of Hollywood’s “golden age” were horribly mistreated. Judy Garland, poor Natalie Wood & so many whose stories we never heard. The industry is like a magnet for predators & it has never really grappled with the issue.
I’m to the point where I think it should be illegal for people under the age of 18 to work in Hollywood. Sexual exploitation and substance abuse seems to be the standard and not the exception for child actors. Hollywood appears to be an inherently damaging environment. It’s not ok to damage children for profit and entertainment. Someday we’ll look back in horror that it was ever allowed.
Look at the Harry Potter cast: they started working as child actors, but they all seem well adjust adults, the difference is striking.
What someone seems to be is not necessarily what they are. And who knows what we wont hear awful tales coming out in the future about them too? Dan Rad, bless him, had alcohol problems during filming. Another kid got kicked off the film for growing weed or something.
I just watched Stand By Me again for the first time in years, and he’s right–pain radiates from those eyes. I was talking with my family about the physical grace and emotional maturity of River Phoenix in this film, and how it was a painful reminder of what we lost, but man, Wil Wheaton killed, too, and in fact, almost everyone in the movie is freaking great.
It’s heartbreaking how many child actors come from abusive environments.
I knew a woman that was a child actor. She was in small wonder, troop Beverly Hills and had her own show. She told horror stories of the parents and children. It was awful. There’s so much manipulation, neglect and general abuse. Her mother was part of it. It’s not something that will change easily.
@Wiglet: so that would be Leslie Bega?
No. Emily Schulman. She was the bratty redhead on small wonder.
She became a really great cycling instructor and was my mentor while I did it. Great woman.
As a side note when she worked with Shelley Long all parents were kept in check around her because Shelley was having none of their toxic parenting coaching the kids from the side of the set.
Former actress here. I shot a project with a 7-year old child back in the ’90s and his parents were NIGHTMARES. They had multiple children that they pretty much forced into the business, who were, consequently, supporting the entire family. I can still see that poor child being dragged around by his ear.
Poor guy. It seems like he’s in a good place now. I can’t read his name and not hear “h-Wil h-Weaton” in my head.
Oh man Stand By Me is a true heartbreaker of a movie- I screened it for my kids when they were tweens and it was a huge hit with all 3, probably my favorite Stephen King adaption. I’ve long been suspicious of anyone who puts their kid into acting- first and foremost no child should be subject to the pressure of supporting their entire family financially, and omg the pedos, your literally sacrificing your kids to the pedo gods. As a parent it’s just a MESS of red flags and I have total empathy for any kid who survived that life.
After reading all these comments and thinking back to child actors of my youth I Wonder has anybody ever heard Ron Howard speak of issues he had for being a child actor?
I saw one interview where he spoke about it, but said that his dad (also an actor) and his mom made sure that he and his brother Clint had some normalcy in their lives.
Ron and Clint seem to have come out of the experience just fine, but who really knows.
I’ve heard Ron Howard’s dad talk about it, how they had very strict rules for what Ronnie could and couldn’t do on a set, including the number of hours he worked and the type of work he was allowed to do. Rance Howard was a straight arrow good guy, that was my impression.
IIRC, Howard has said Andy Griffith mentored him during and after the show.
It’s based on a semi autobiographical short story and Gordie is young Stephen King, so casting a tortured soul is absolutely perfect. IDK if I can rewatch it though. The ending is heart wrenching and bizarrely prescient.
Love Will so much.
I’ve always imagined most child actors, especially everyone before and during the 90s, had overbearing, uncompromising and abusive parents and guidance.
Stand by me was and is an awesome watch.
My niece, now 13, is a strikingly beautiful girl with all the features they look for in models. She’s also charismatic, kind of quirky, just a great kid. Last year during the Pandemic (when she was not in school and at home with her two younger brothers) she was feeling very depressed, calling herself “ugly,” so I took her for a photo shoot. Not for her to use for modeling, just to give her a boost and for fun.
She did really well, she’s a natural and the photographer was impressed. My sister-in-law was open to the idea and so was my niece, because these days, thank God, they don’t use girls that young as runway models. She would have been doing photo shoots for kids’ clothes, very tame, that sort of thing. She was also interested in acting.
Anyway, nine months later and they are too busy and I think are no longer interested in pursuing it. Just as well. It was never about that, for me. I just wanted her to dress up, do something fun and realize she is a lovely girl. She’s still suffering some from depression and just from being a tween in general I think, but she’s doing better. They plan to move out of the city (NY) so it wouldn’t be feasible anyway. They’re just too busy.
But my brother and his wife never would have forced her to do anything she didn’t want to do, and they would never take her money. They would have just put any earnings into her college fund. But not all parents are like that. It’s sad to hear these stories.
My first thought, somehow, went to Millie Bobby Brown and her horrible father. I believe there may be some kids who work in showbusiness and retain a kind of normal life, but the majority is probably as ‘happy’ as Wil was. The only relatively ‘normal’ child stars I heard of are the Harry Potter bunch, and Daniel Radcliffe still was and is public about the difficulties he faced and the alcohol problems his work and fame caused.
DiCaprio,Bale ,Jodie Foster ,ScarJo or Nathalie Portman were all child actors and they seem « normal »
Hilary Duff made it through pretty unscathed, even despite having her mom as her manager as a kid. But I’ve always thought that she seemed like the rare child star who actually did call the shots and worked when she chose to, not the reverse, as she always took breaks from her career when she wanted to and never seemed like she was coerced into anything. I’ve never gotten Dina Lohan vibes from her mom. It probably helped that Hilary has always been really close to her older sister, too.
Man, these poor child stars, though… it makes you wonder what some of them have been through that nobody even knows about. 🥺 It’s scary.
I love Will Wheaton, he was amazing in TNG and later in Big Bang Theory. I think what has happened to him is similar to a lot of child actors in the 90’s that ultimately had a tragic effect on a lot of them. However I wanted to comment on your last line about more high profile people discussing mental health. While I entirely agree that mental health should be discussed openly I feel like when high profile people discuss mental health they need to acknowledge the immense priviledge of being in a position to actually get the help you need. Mental health care is still one of the most expensive services an American can get in healthcare and is notoriously difficult to find coverage for in insurance policies. More so, the access to mental health care in the US is even harder than acessing general healthcare. I firmly believe that a big part of the stigma around mental health has to do with how difficult it is to afford beyond treating it with medication. There are a lot of conversations around mental health at the moment, but I wish lobbying for access and affordability was more front and center.
Yes, and since Covid many therapists are not accepting new patients.
I never understood how any parent would want their kids to be a child star or actor. Nothing good besides money seems to come from it. Very few seem to turn into well adjusted adults after a childhood in front of the cameras.