Nikki Reed: I work full time, but I don’t have any professional childcare


Nikki Reed has almost completely dropped out of the acting spotlight to run her farm with husband Ian Somerhalder. In addition to that, she runs her own jewelry line, Bayou with Love. Her stuff is cute. Recently, she partnered with Wondercide who makes essential oil-based pest control products. She’s also a hands-on mom to her four-year-old daughter, Bodhi, and said she enlists no professional childcare at all. Nikki said there’s nothing wrong with having help, she just doesn’t want any. Fortunately, she also said her intuition has never led her astray, so obviously she’s made the right decision.

On being environmental friendly: It’s just a part of our everyday life. She sees that Mommy makes the extra effort… For example, I’m in a place right now where they don’t pick up your recycling. So most people would just combine trash and recycling and say, “I don’t care.” But my daughter knows that every other day Mommy’s gonna load up the recycling into the back of the car and we’re going to drive it to the recycling center because there’s no way I’m not going to do that stuff… I buy water in bulk, in glass, so that’s always a conversation; she knows that we don’t drink out of plastic. She knows that when we go anywhere in the car or travel or do anything, I keep all of our reusable silverware in the center console of the car. If we ever pick up take-out food, she knows that Mommy’s going to bring my own Tupperware to pick it up.

On motherly intuition: I’ve learned a lot about intuition for sure. I’ve always had really solid intuition, but I’ve learned now, since becoming a mom, that I don’t question it at all; I don’t even give it one second of overthinking. If I know something in my gut, I know it and I go with it… You just know in your gut what the right move is for your child, you know?

On finding a life balance: And so I learned to slow down in some ways. Yes, I’m still operating my company and I’m involved in every aspect of the business, from operations to the creative, to web copy, to design photography, all of it. So I’m very involved in my company, and that is totally consuming at times. And then I also sit on the board of a couple of other companies as the strategic marketing adviser and I have a couple of other jobs too. So there’s a lot happening in my world, but … the greatest gift is that I’ve learned that it’s OK to say no to people around me, but also to myself.

On not employing any help: I’m a very hands-on parent. I work full-time, but I also don’t have any professional childcare — not that there’s anything wrong with that at all; I think it’s wonderful if that’s what suits your family. But I really want to be as present as possible with my daughter. I like being there for every bath time and every meal time, so I kind of work around that. I set my alarm and I work really early, from 5 in the morning until 8:30, when she’s up, and then I take a break for her breakfast, and then I go back to work in the in-between times. She has been in preschool and stuff like that, so those are my moments of break and work. And then I work late into the evenings.

[From Yahoo!]

How? How does a person run every aspect of their own company, sit on the board of other companies, and not employ any help with their child? I’m trying to remember preschool hours, do they have full day options? I guess if Nikki’s daughter is out of the house from 9-5 she could run her business during that time. Of course, Nikki specifies she doesn’t have professional childcare, not that she doesn’t employ assistants and housekeepers. If someone else is helping tend to the house and do the shopping and run errands, that would make it doable. I mean, good for her, it just sounds exhausting. But she’s right, she needs to do what she thinks is best. And if sacrificing sleep is what she’s willing to do to forego childcare, then she’s found her system. Can we assume Ian is helping? At one point, Nikki referred to Bodhi as her “first” child. So I guess they’re still planning on more. One thing is clear, Nikki adores being Bodhi’s mom so thank goodness she’s been able to arrange her world around that.

I’m also jealous of her intuition. I don’t know if there was ever a time I didn’t question something I’d decided or done. That must be a wonderful feeling to be so sure of your choices.

This is less important, but I was really curious about Nikki’s Tupperware comments. Will take-out places let you bring your own? It seems like there would be some legalities involved. Maybe it’s places they know the owners or something, farmers tend to be a tight knit community.

*In that top photo, that’s are biodegradable straw. She’s promoting them




Photo credit: Instagram

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112 Responses to “Nikki Reed: I work full time, but I don’t have any professional childcare”

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  1. Jan says:

    Note, she is saying professional help, that doesn’t rule out family member or paying a babysitter.

    • HelloDolly! says:

      Yes! Having grandparents who take care of grandchildren is like winning the lottery–at least in high cost places, like LA.

      My husband and I can barely afford childcare for one child because it’s so expensive! We marvel at our friends who have multiple kids (how do they pay for the care?) and then we find out a Grandma or Grandpa cares for the kids a few days a week or more. That saves them literally a grand!

      • Caitrin says:

        When all three of our kids overlapped in daycare and preschool, we were paying $24K a year.

      • Christine says:

        I’m a single mom, and my Mom and I bought a duplex together, so I always had her help with my son. I am horrified by daycare costs, and I really admire all of you that can come up with that coin. It is totally winning the lottery that my Mom helped, those years before my son started school. I do cook dinner for all three of us every day, so that’s kinda payment??

      • Mia says:

        I pay $1800 a month for ONE kid in preschool in the Bay Area :-/

    • GrnieWnie says:

      yeah, that’s what I thought too.

      I did this, since I was too poor/legally barred from access. It was awful. I spent four years just exhausted to the bone. We live in a messed up world that imposes this on women/parents.

  2. Gab says:

    Pre-school can be fulltime and i would consider that professional childcare. This is like saying you don’t have a nanny but your kid goes to daycare.

    • Twin falls says:

      School of any sort is childcare. I’m NOT saying teachers aren’t teaching but the only reason I’m able to work a job in addition to parenting is because for six hours a day, Monday through Friday, another adult is responsible for my child. Nikki here, like every other employed beyond parenting parent, has help.

  3. ML says:

    Biodegradable straws are greenwashing.

    • Porter says:

      Ashamed to admit I had never heard this word before, but now I’ve gone down an internet rabbit hole learning about it. Thanks for introducing me to this concept!

  4. MaryContrary says:

    “Professional childcare” means that her help is not a trained nanny. That could still mean she has some high school or college student over every afternoon to help out, or her sister or mother in law live next door. Eye roll. I’ve been a SAHM for a bazillion years, and when my crew was little I had a lot of pt help-which I always admitted. You don’t win some kind of prize for doing everything.

    • Veronika says:


    • Hellohello says:

      Right?! I’m so puzzled by the parenting-by-bootstrapping Olympics, esp among the wealthy. For the love of god, there’s no prize for making your life more challenging than it needs to be and it doesn’t make you more “relatable”. It just reinforces this American idea that rugged individualism is somehow more valuable than community care.

      • JustBe says:

        This is such an important point! A truly civilized country would have community care of young children and elders, without shame, whether its because their loved ones need to work or run errands or just a break from the hard work of taking care of small people.
        I try to give space to the people to speak their truth, even when our lifestyles or opinions differ, but I’m really sensitive to messages that seem to undermine the idea of striving to create systems that meet the needs of the community.

  5. Ersatz says:

    Do americans never drink tap water?

    • Square_bologna says:

      This American does, I keep it refrigerated in repurposed juice bottles. But many people in my city complain about the amount of chlorine in our tap water. I personally don’t taste it that strongly so I’m fine, but I understand that if someone’s local tap water tastes bad to them, or they question its safety, they might prefer to buy it.

    • paranormalgirl says:

      I filter it, but yes, I drink tap water.

    • Veronika says:

      I know, it’s weird, right?
      Maybe it’s a west coast thing or desert thing? My friends & family in California, Arizona, New Mexico, Texas buy water.
      I never do but I love the water in my city. I found out a couple of years ago that my local water treatment facility was rated the top in my state. I do live in a state with an abundance of water. Well water is safe, too.

      • Fabiola says:

        You’re right. I’m from California and I buy water and so does everyone I know. It’s always been that way since I was a little girl. My parents never gave me tap water.

    • Kelsey says:

      I have a filter attached to my kitchen sink that I fill a water pitcher with so technically I drink tap water.

      But if the filter goes bad and I don’t find the replacement at the time/they’re out of stock, I do sadly buy water bottles until I can get a new filter. I drink a lot of water so I really try not to go without keeping filters on hand, but in our tap water you can TASTE the difference. I couldn’t (would rather not) drink it without a water filter.

    • Becks1 says:

      I do, I like it, but my mom won’t because she doesn’t like the taste of water where she lives (about two hours from me.) When she’s here she drinks my tap water though.

    • canichangemyname? says:

      Girl, I do (drink tap water). Provided I know it’s safe. I feel good about where we live now, so I just use the tap and there’s a couple gallons of cold water in the fridge every day.

    • mellie says:

      I do, I love our tap water…I’m in the midwest and it’s really good and safe to drink where I live. I only drink bottled water if absolutely necessary.

    • Bunny says:

      We filter it, but yes. We also drink water from a naturally carbonated spring near our home that flows without pumping year round.
      The water is ice cold and a little bitter. This is the first place I’ve lived with anything like that, and it feels like a luxury even though it is free.

    • huckle says:

      I drink tap water all the time w/no filter. This will probably sound stupid since I have nothing to back it up but my feelings but I think it’s why I don’t get sick.

    • equality says:

      I do. But I have a well.

    • lucy2 says:

      I filter my tap water, but I’m lucky to live in an area where it’s good to begin with.

    • Caitrin says:

      I do!

    • Ally says:

      I mean…it depends on where you live. If you’re not from the states, Google Flint, Michigan. You’ll understand why some of us in urban areas prefer not to trust the tap. Especially when it’s discolored or smells. In my area last week it was both all week and the authorities swore it was safe and we didn’t need to boil it or anything. I’m not drinking that water. I didn’t even really want my kids bathing in it.

    • Jaded says:

      Canadian here – we filter our tap water with a Brita, always have. I can’t remember the last time I bought bottled water. If we’re out and about and need a water break we always fill up a couple of sports bottles to bring with us.

    • Lori says:

      There does seem to be a need to “buy water”. I was kinda struck by this too. Get a Berkey if your water at home is not fit to drink.

  6. OriginalLala says:

    What does buying water in bulk (in glass) mean? does she not have a faucet?

    • rainbowkitty says:

      I’m wondering if she is on a city water line or maybe its a water shortage thing. That confused me too. I’m on city water but we just filter it before drinking.

    • AEvaJohnson says:

      I work at a Food Co-op, and it’s totally normal for stores like mine or stores like Whole Foods, for that matter, to have reverse osmosis water machines where you can fill up reusable bottles and jugs of water for a nominal fee, and it sounds like this might be what Nikki does. It’s a very popular option for those who prefer not to drink city water (because of taste or added chemicals) and who prefer to avoid buying bottled water. Of course, most people I know use BPA-free plastic jugs, but it’s not unheard of for people to take it a step further and buy re-usable glass bottles if they can afford them and are avoiding plastic.

  7. Twin falls says:

    She’s drives her recycling every other day?

    • equality says:

      Yeah, that caught my attention also. How much stuff do they use?

    • lucy2 says:

      I wondered about that too – I recycle everything possible, and only fill up my can every 2-3 weeks at most.

    • Isabellaluna says:

      Also…doesn’t that sort of counteract the carbon footprint issue, if she’s constantly trekking around in her car?

    • Theia says:

      all those car trips aren’t really ecologically friendly, seems like it would make more sense to wait and do a run every week or two. Especially for someone with just one kid and who avoids plastics, how much recycling would she have?

  8. Veronika says:

    The pandemic has proved that working full time and being a full time parent simultaneously is not possible.
    I think she is leaving out the assistance she gets from family. She has a husband & her parents.
    A lot of Hollywood types buy their parents a house when they strike it big, the parents can retire early, move in next door and babysit. It’s a nice thing, for sure.

    • rainbowkitty says:

      Agree… her interview made it sound like she was doing everything by herself. I can say that it is not possible. I live in a different country than my parents and all other family members and the pandemic nearly broke me. I can’t tell you how many times I was in tears or crying to my mom about how I needed help. It’s ok to say you have help. Its normal. I would love to have help sometimes.

      • Veronika says:

        I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through!
        The pandemic nearly broke me, too. Actually…I need to correct myself, it DID break me. I had a breakdown & quit my job almost 6 months ago. I’m a nurse & the hospital I work in was overwhelmed with COVID patients. I quarantined from my husband & kids for 8 weeks, they lived in the lake cabin we rent out & I stayed in our house close to work. Then the schools went full-time virtual learning and my husband was staying home with them. His work was piling up, his customers were pissed, he is self employed so he couldn’t stay home any longer. He also earns 3x what I do, despite me being a nurse for 25 years. Then I caught COVID. Thankfully I had a mild case. But more quarantine from my family.
        But lying in my bed alone at night in my empty house I wondered if I got more sick would I die without seeing my children again?
        My kids would cry themselves to sleep, my kindergartener had nightmares, my husband is a fantastic father but he was scared, too.
        More positive cases led to more quarantine.
        I eventually quit.
        I did the right thing for my family. I’m happy with my decision. But I am broken, confused & mourning the lives of people I watched die from COVID.
        I’ve never been unemployed. I’ve been earning a paycheck since I was 16 years old.
        I’m so thankful I had mild COVID and thus far no long-term symptoms or issues. But emotionally a part of me has died.
        I loved being a nurse. I miss being a nurse.
        But I cannot go back to that hospital.
        I never will.

      • Wiglet Watcher says:

        I was also a nurse that quit because of the Covid chaos. I’m never going back. It’s absolutely ok to leave for your mental health and your family.
        I’m sorry for all your stress.

    • Hell Nah! says:

      Oh my goodness – Veronika, I am so so sorry for what you went through. My heart was racing as I read your account of what happened to you over the last year. All the virtual hugs I can send are on their way to you alongside blessings to you and your family.

      You did the right thing – never regret saving yourself for the good of your family and your own mental and physical health.

      • Fabiola says:

        Veronika, you did the right thing. I’m glad you listened to yourself and put yourself and your family first. I hope you’re doing better. Maybe in the future you could work as a nurse remotely. It’s hard to stop working if that’s all one knows.

    • Taylor says:

      ok thank you!!!! i feel like you would be doing a serious disservice to your child/ren if you were working and leaving them to play on their own all day…..

  9. carol says:

    I guess her intuition was off when she married her first husband…

    • rainbowkitty says:


    • Lauren R says:

      I think it is interesting that she never mentions her husband Ian… for some reason I thought that maybe they were separated or something… Ian mentioned her recently thanking her for helping him get out of a bad business deal or something like that… but even then I thought his message about his wife seemed off?

    • SomeChick says:

      it is definitely possibly to strengthen your intuition. noticing it and relying on it helps a lot.

      perhaps her intuition was telling her not to marry the first dude and she ignored it!

  10. LovesitinNM says:

    Is this supposed to be relatable? I wish just once she would have acknowledged how this is possible because she’s rich. And implying that people who can’t do this have made a choice that works for their family?! Ok this is maddening. Who isn’t there for every breakfast and bath time?

    • BC says:

      I wish there was a like button on your comment cause I’d click it 1000 times. Everyone on here is how does she do this? She must be lying or not counting some help. Answer, she’s rich and owns her company and people will then work with her schedule not the other way around as most of us have to work. She claimed she worked in the early morning for 3.5 hours a day before her daughter gets up (a situation most working people can’t do) and in the evening for let’s say 2 hours since she didn’t say exactly about that. Well that’s 5.5 hours and she only need 2.5 more to make a full time job with a five day work week. It’s not just the added money and help you get with being wealthy and privileged it’s also the ability to schedule to your situation. Which may be worth more than the help in most cases.

      I also agree it’s not relatable to most people. However, on an up note it is better than celebrities complaining about how hard it is with raising kids when they have all these resources. Yeah but obviously from the comments on here people don’t get her situation at all.

    • thaisajs says:

      You know who isn’t there for every breakfast and bedtime? Low-income women in service jobs who don’t have regular shifts or who work multiple jobs. I’m sure they’d like the luxury of setting their own hours, too. Female privilege in action here.

  11. lunchcoma says:

    It’s not like she’s a single mom. Ian isn’t working much these days. Presumably he’s parenting too.

    • Ainsley7 says:

      That’s what struck me. This interview reads like she is a single parent with zero help. I’m sure Ian and probably her/his parents would like a word lol.

      • lunchcoma says:

        I remember her family being pretty messy, but yeah, I wouldn’t be shocked if one of them had a relative living nearby as well.

      • Nina says:

        Same, if I didn’t know she’s married, this interview would sound to me like she’s a single parent

    • court says:

      Right? Can Ian not making breakfast so Nikki can sleep until 5:30? Just so over the rich.

  12. LA says:

    Daycares have rooms called “pre-school” and they can run a full 12 hours. My oldest did this. I’m just sayin.

  13. FluglyBear says:

    I take her meaning to be she doesn’t have a professional nanny.

  14. Aphra says:

    I couldn’t believe it when I heard a friend describe America (Texas I think), where people just throw everything in the trash with NO recycling or composting whatsoever. I was flabbergasted.

    • chai35 says:

      As she points out, recycling is not easily available everywhere. I can only recycle cans and bottles through curbside pick-up, if I want to recycle cardboard, then I have to pack it up and haul it to the landfill on my own. My parents only recently got any kind of curbside pickup and they’ve lived at their house for more than 37 years. The truth is, driving to a central location or to the landfill isn’t realistic for a lot of people who may not have time or access to a vehicle.

      And composting can be done at a small scale if you have an apartment, but not at any kind of large scale. We temporarily had a company that would pick up compost from you for a fee, but that didn’t survive through COVID.

    • lucy2 says:

      Depends where you are, America is big and varies greatly. My area has a great recycling program, with weekly pick up, and a drop off center, but I’m in the Northeast suburbs. If you’re in a very remote or rural area, it’s likely to not have it.

  15. Mimi says:

    Goody for her. So do millions and millions of other parents who work full time and don’t have professional help. Want a medal

  16. girl_ninja says:

    Her husband is odd and makes me nervous. I hope that she is happy but some of her life sounds a bit contrived.

    • Isabellaluna says:

      I am so glad you said it! There is something about him that makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up, and it has nothing to do with his role on VD.

  17. canichangemyname? says:

    She sounds like she’s in a bubble of privilege. And her “not that there’s anything wrong with that” comment didn’t really negate that the way she probably thought it did. These moms who are like, “Nothing wrong with someone else watching your kid, but ***I*** like to be there for every bath and every step” is like … yeah, you’re saying the rest of us don’t gaf about baths or steps. I’m unimpressed here, sorry.

    • Hell Nah! says:

      100% agree. She sounds like a I’m-a-better-mom-than-you snot.

      • Grumpier than thou says:

        I definitely agree – she sounds like a smug tit. Admittedly I might just be even grumpier than usual having made the *choice* to miss every meal and bath time today as I prioritised being able to pay for things.

    • lucy2 says:

      That bothered me too. “That’s great for your family, but I like to be fully present.” Well excuse me.

      She may not have a professional nanny, but I’m sure has some other form of help, whether it’s a pre-school program, a relative or friend, or household help who also keeps an eye on the kid when she’s working.
      Plus let’s be honest, these business ventures celebrities do are rarely 9-5 jobs with a commute, week after week after week – I’m sure they’re all involved and do work, but it’s not a daily grind, they’re not the ones manufacturing or dealing with orders, they have more flexibility and freedom than most average workers, so it’s just not comparable.

  18. Willow says:

    Ugh! Who is this interview with? Sounds like she’s promoting environmental stuff and it’s for a parenting magazine. The problem isn’t what she’s talking about, it’s how it’s presented. Everything she does is a great example for her daughter, her life revolves around being a successful business woman and a perfect mom. You can do it all ladies! But she doesn’t talk about all the other chores that have to be done to run a household and farm. If you don’t have money or family for help, the life she is describing is not possible. I really hate these fake perfect lives. Because then society looks at women who live in the real world and judge them as lacking.

  19. SusanRagain says:

    how does driving your recyclable items to the recycling center several days a week do any good? Aren’t you burning gas/using resources and basically cancelling out the gain of recycling?

    Also, wealthy and married lady with 1 healthy child brags about non having professional help. Go soak yer head lady!
    Try being in the middle of a divorce, with a medically fragile, frequent hospitalized baby, and all your immediate family have passed away, plus being served with foreclosure notice all at the same time. I lived thru that and also, by sheer force and luck so did my child.

    Btw, what is she spraying on that calf? lol

    • SpankyB says:

      She’s spraying Wondercide on the calf. It’s good stuff but I don’t think you’re supposed to spray directly onto the animal. I use it in my cat’s catio to keep fleas and ticks away. Smells good too.

  20. Case says:

    “I like being there for every bath time and every meal time, so I kind of work around that. I set my alarm and I work really early, from 5 in the morning until 8:30, when she’s up, and then I take a break for her breakfast, and then I go back to work in the in-between times.”

    So she has privileged nice-to-have jobs that aren’t necessary to her survival and is able to work from home and make her own schedule, basically.

  21. North of Boston says:

    I can’t with her after all the nonsense that went down on the Sleepy Hollow tv show, when Nicole Beharie and other actors of color were systematically sidelined/written off and replaced by people like NR, with a dose of mistreatment while they were still there.

    She came late to that S**tshow, but she came in full force.

    • Fortuona says:

      Well she was playing a white character from the past on the show unless they were supposed to re-invent Betsy Ross as a Black woman

      • North of Boston says:

        LOL! They had a headless horseman and a 200 year old Revolutionary War soldier as the male lead and a magic evil demon baby /old guy who was the child of the 200 year old and a floaty witch who escaped the underworld, but you’re *absolutely right*, Betsy Ross, alive in 2015, being *black* would have been an unbelievable bridge too far.

        They could have instead kept the story focused on the amazing characters they started with, and had great ratings/press with, including those played by BIPOC and brought in whatever guest stars they pleased, instead of sidelining NB and others.

    • Zantasia says:

      I absolutely stopped watching when Nicole Beharie wasn’t on anymore. The quality dropped immediately.

      • Fortuona says:

        Well Nikki was on when NB was still on the show . Meghan’s bestie Janina Gavankar took over for the 13 episode final season as the mother of NB’s replacement who was a little girl

      • Deering24 says:

        Boy, did the new showrunner do Beharie dirty on that show. 🤮 His racism literally tanked a success. Proof, once again, that racists whining about merit/profit getting lost because of non-whites are full of shit.

  22. Ctgirl says:

    I get the impression that she’s really invested in making her life appear perfect. How exhausting. And, quite frankly, uninteresting. The every day mess of life makes things interesting.

  23. Jenny says:

    Pre- school is full time. I’m a solo mommy (no family support) who works full time (from home) and I couldn’t do without my sons pre-school. I also work from 5 am until he wakes up. Take him to day care/ work all day / pick him up and start working again once he falls asleep. I wouldn’t change a thing – but credit where credit is due. Pre-school is 100% allowing her (and I) to live this life. I wish I had help once in a while, but count my blessings my son is in a quality Center.

  24. Wiglet Watcher says:

    My children are my dogs and I still employed Rover to help because I worked full time.

    Ugh wondercide… it gave all 3 of my dogs rashes after changing their formula for profit increases.

    I think this is a case of living in a bubble. Her “full time” may not be consistent every day. She may do most of her work at night when the kids are asleep. And I grew up on a farm without employed help. It’s almost impossible to care for everything. You certainly do not have time for cute photo shoots.

    As far as her intuition goes… when you have the comforts of steady income and a simplified life you never question much because what is there to worry about? That’s just security with fewer options to mess things up.

    I think her comments are beyond disconnected from the reality most farmers and working moms face.

  25. Turtledove says:

    It sounds like she has a life that she loves and good for her, sincerely.

    The part where she mentions driving the recycling to the recycling center sounds exhausting. I appreciate that she does it and doesn;t just dump it in the landfill. But juts reading that made me appreciate my curbside recycling pick up SO MUCH.

    I see a lot of comments trying to parse out her statement of “no professional help” and I think they are probably right, she as some kind of help. I wish it wasn’t so important for some moms to dance around that topic. If I had been super wealthy, *I* would have had more help too. I did pay for childcare whenmy child was young, as i workd full time and she could not exactly come to the office with me. But even if I was loaded and could stay at home full time, i would have hired SOME kind of help. I always thought it would be great to stay at home, and have a nanny one or two days a week.

    • Fortuona says:

      Well she is friends with Shailene Woodley in real life for years and thats where a lot of the recyling come from . I think she makes jewellry out of it and Shai is involved in a company who make eye glasses/sunglasses out of recylables

  26. CindyP says:

    Not understanding all the negativity here. Sending your child to daycare is NOT the same as employing a full time in-house nanny or occasional babysitter
    I don’t think she’s bragging; she successful & doing what she think is right for her child
    Good for her
    Unfortunate that some of you don’t have the same options as she does &; struggle to manage home & work life; it’s hard but come on
    Just mean spirited

    • Sigmund says:

      But daycare IS professional childcare. I don’t get what you’re arguing for here.

      • CindyP says:

        Did I say it wasn’t? Yes, she misspoke; so what? Equating a live in nanny to daycare is ludicrous. What’s your point here?

    • court says:

      What’s Nikki’s point? She employs at least one set of professionals (preschool staff) to help care for her child. Why get up at 5 if you have a co-parent & the ability to outsource child care? Is she so narcissistic she doesn’t think her kid can survive without her for one meal or bath time? I don’t understand the point she was trying to make, and I don’t think she did either.

  27. Wilma says:

    ‘ But I really want to be as present as possible with my daughter.’ Ah, the judgement….

    Who produces enough waste to drive to the recycle centre every day? Is that normal for Americans? Do you get everything triple packaged?

    • North of Boston says:

      It is not normal.
      It’s very abnormal.
      Many Americans do generate a lot of waste, but having a carload of recycling coming out of a single family home every other day seems excessive. In my community I typically see people putting out one barrel of trash a week and one barrel of recycling every other week, maybe more recycling if they are getting a lot of deliveries and have a stack of cardboard, but that typically would be the opposite of the lifestyle she’s advertising.

      Who knows. Maybe their using that water from glass bottles to bathe in or to water the livestock? Because they could pile up quickly.

      • Wilma says:

        Ah, yes, those bottles of water! I’m so used to being able to drink and use tapwater for everything. I also misread that she went every day instead of every other day.

    • Wiglet Watcher says:

      It’s not normal at all… it makes you wonder what she’s using when she promotes compost products.
      At my absolute worst because my town and state did not recycle much we made weekly or monthly trips for bottles and cans, but even then… we were nowhere nearly daily.

  28. Songs (Or it didnt happen) says:

    I don’t want to tear down her statement, but a job where you can take time out to have breakfast with your daughter, then “go back to work” isn’t really a full time ‘job’. I guess I’m saying that being the boss and having a jewelry line and doing zoom meetings in between tummy time and meals with your kid is not the same as a 7am to 3pm shift at the Assisted Living Facility or 4pm to close as Target. Her full time job routine is just not very relatable.

    • Veronika says:

      Thank you.

    • Moneypenny says:

      I don’t disagree, but working from home full time is different than working in person. I’ve been very lucky to work from home as a lawyer for the past 1.5 years and it does give me a bit more flexibility.

      Now having said that, it was impossible to actually work at watch our 3 year old full time too, so grandma came over every day to take care of her. So, while I buy that she can move things a bit to have breakfast, I do balk at always being available for her kid–what about meetings and such?? Can’t really schedule those around your child’s whims. I try to block off noon from meetings, but that works about 40% of the time.

      • Ania says:

        Exactly. I work from home, FT. Even with the flexibility it’s still tiring. All my day is either bringing my daughter to and from preschool, work, spending time with her and finishing work in the evening. Zero time to relax in peace. So it’s hard for me to believe it’s Niki’s day 5 days a week.

  29. lolalola3 says:

    That tupperware thing sounds like the biggest line of bullsh*t. I do not believe for one second that a restaurant will let someone else’s containers –not knowing how it has been sanitized or not– into their kitchen.

    • Anne says:

      +1 That would be a health code violation. I saw a woman at Starbucks hand the barista her own travel mug for her coffee and flipped her lid when she saw the barista pour the coffee into a SB paper cup, then pour it into her mug. He told her they’re not allowed to pour/make drinks directly into a customer’s mug/bottle/cup b/c it’s a health code violation and they could get dinged for that.

      Even if she transfers the food from their container to her Tupperware, that’s still waste — now it’s just the restaurant’s waste instead of hers.

      NPR/Pro Publica did a really in-depth report on recycling in America and apparently, less then 2% of “recyclable” material actually gets recycled into something else, and even that percentage might be wildly optimistic. Food containers can be made from recycled material, but that food container can’t be then recycled again because of the food residue. It was super interesting but also super depressing.

  30. Veronica S. says:

    Oh my God, shut up lol. Trying to win the gold medal in parenting olympics against other women is so droll. Not only does money make the playing field uneven (do you brag about outrunning amputees on a jogging trail, too?), but the competition is so broad as to render your contribution negligible. Congratulations! You shoved a baby out of you! Now you’re one among billions. Hell, some of them accomplished it entirely by accident. Chew on that for awhile while you’re drinking that distilled boxed water.

  31. Honey says:

    I applaud her commitment to recycling and not using plastic. However, is she really able to get takeout in her own containers as stated in the article? I’ve tried in my area and it’s not allowed by the health department. It would be great if city/county/state health codes allowed this. Is anyone else able to get takeout if they bring their own container?

    • gaitanalyst says:

      I asked once too but no luck. Best I could do is get my local grocery to let me bring in my own container for the salad/deli bar.

  32. Calypso says:

    Recycling isn’t a real thing that we should focus on, we need to focus on REDUCE number one, then reuse, then recycling as a *last resort*. It’s not a real solution.

    Also, I bring tupperware containers to restaurants. American portions are massive and I never finish and I find it’s not a big deal to just open up my tupperware, put my leftovers inside. I leave some in my car in case I go out unprepared. I haven’t had any complaints from restaurants yet.

    • lucy2 says:

      Reduce for sure. I’ve gone to bar soap, bar shampoo (I also have one that sends a big refill bag that equals 4 bottles), laundry detergent strips, and spray cleaner tablets. So many things I used to get in plastic bottles.

  33. AmelieOriginal says:

    She definitely has help for childcare in the shape of her husband, but the way she spoke made her sound like a single parent doing everything. She must have friends or family nearby to help watch her daughter once in awhile or maybe a local high school kid babysitter?

    My parents got rid of full-time nannies/babysitters around the time I was in second grade after a few bad incidents with them. One babysitter wrecked one of our family cars in a really bad accident (my sister and I were not in the car at the time) and another never showed up to pick us up from school one afternoon (I won’t go into the reason why she never showed up, my mom is still so upset about hiring that woman all these years later and doesn’t like when I bring up that story). My dad got up at the crack of dawn to put in his 8 hour work day super early (6 am-2 PM) to pick up my sister and me at school in the afternoons. My mom was with us in the mornings for the morning drop off and didn’t come home til after 6 (she commuted on Metronorth to and from NYC). We also carpooled with another family for quite a few years, it was a bit of a zoo. My grandparents occasionally stepped in to watch us and some aunts and uncles that lived nearby but my parents overwhelmingly did it alone. During the summers, we had au pairs/older cousins watching us when we weren’t at summer camp. But they had help, despite not having any professional childcare year-round. And they also had some high school kids watch us for occasional date nights and what not.

  34. Bee says:

    My intuition says this woman is an asshole.

  35. Sophie says:


    If you work full time without childcare, either:

    A) You are not actually working, or

    B) You’re children are not being cared for.

    I say this as a full-time-working mother who did a year without childcare during the pandemic. Either I was working, or my child was in front of a screen. You can’t be in two places at once.