John Mulaney’s girlfriend isn’t going to refute ‘a narrative that’s just not true’

2020 Vanity Fair Oscar Party

John Mulaney’s Girlfriend (JMG) is currently promoting a movie called Violet. That’s why she’s doing interviews these days, but of course most interviewers want to talk about her pregnancy or John Mulaney. JMG is kind of fine with that – she is, after all, seeking attention and validation, but she’s also performatively coy, like this is somehow beneath her. All of which brings me to this LA Times interview, where she snipes at people speculating about the timeline of her romance with Mulaney. Some highlights:

She’s been full of anxiety during the pregnancy: “My brain hasn’t been able to settle because it’s just a constant feeling of you’re doing it wrong. People tell me the baby will come and then you’ll figure it out. But that doesn’t stop the anxiety I feel right now.”

On all of the rumors about her relationship with John Mulaney: “It’s definitely not foreign for me to have people speculate incorrectly about things and to have rumors run rampant in one way. They think they know our relationship so well. When in reality, they don’t. There’s no way anyone could know what any of his relationships were or what our relationship is,” she says — speaking in the present tense, for the record.

She’s not going to tell us the timeline: She has chosen not to refute specific claims because it will “feed into a narrative that’s just not true,” especially since people tend to “ignore really specific public signs and actions that completely contradict the false narrative. For whatever reason, it’s easier to blame me. If I try to say anything, I run the risk of being called messy or not telling the truth. The only way to win, for me, is to pull back and to not play the game at all.”

She’s not ‘gramming her pregnancy: For Munn, “pulling back” means she hasn’t shared her pregnancy online or gone through one of contemporary celebrity’s most sacrosanct rituals, the Instagram baby bump reveal. She hasn’t invested in cute maternity clothes, she explains, instead repeatedly washing and wearing the same ASOS sweatshirt and Asian American Girl Club sweatpants she has on during this interview. “There’s this vulnerability that I feel that makes me want to … just turn everything off. I’d rather close the door to that and just take care of myself and my baby.”

On Mulaney working the pregnancy into his act & telling jokes about how his impending fatherhood is getting “mixed reviews.” “He’s so funny, and he’s so articulate, and he’s so smart. The first time he made that joke, I remember laughing. I’d be with him on the road, and I would hear him tell this joke, and I did feel a sense of healing with it. It’s hard to be pregnant for the first time and have anybody say anything besides, like, ‘Congratulations.’”

[From The LA Times]

At one point in the interview, she blames her own mixed reviews as a comedian on the idea that she’s so pretty and sexy and therefore people hate her (counterpoint: she’s not funny and she’s a bad actress).

As for the Mulaney situation, apparently people “ignore really specific public signs and actions that completely contradict the false narrative. For whatever reason, it’s easier to blame me. If I try to say anything, I run the risk of being called messy or not telling the truth…” We are missing/ignoring “specific public signs” about John Mulaney and his messiness, according to the girlfriend he impregnated when he was in-and-out of rehab and still married to another woman. I mean… again, even if we’re being generous and saying that Anna-Marie and John’s marriage was on its last leg and they were separated (just not legally separated), it is still pretty f–king messy. It’s not solely about his marriage either – it’s about the rehab stays and the fact that he really was in a dark place with his addiction. Anyway, I don’t solely blame JMG nor do I think Mulaney deserves a pass. They both f–ked around and found out. Cheater cheater potato eater.

2020 Vanity Fair Oscar Party

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79 Responses to “John Mulaney’s girlfriend isn’t going to refute ‘a narrative that’s just not true’”

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  1. Sue says:

    The line about not wanting to buy maternity clothes and not changing out of the same outfit is worrisome. I hope she gets help.

    • Jillian says:

      That made me sad for her, this situation doesn’t seem healthy for anyone involved

    • TIFFANY says:

      Naw, it’s attention seeking.

      She lying.

      The only reason she brought that up is because that was what she was wearing when she arrange her reveal to the paps to force hands.

      She really out here thinking we are dumb.

      • LadySwampwitchGivsneaufux says:

        yes this, the queen of the humble brag. Always talking about not talking about the relationship or pregnancy. Come on. LMFAO

    • GrnieWnie says:

      idk I felt the same way. I ended up really superstitious about pregnancy. A lot of things weren’t working out for me at the time and I was an older parent, and acutely aware of the risks. I didn’t tell any friends I was pregnant until like 6 months in, didn’t post a photo of me pregnant until a week before I delivered. I think maybe older mothers can relate to this more than younger ones can. Just didn’t want to a big mess to clean up should things go awry.

      • Colleen says:

        I half-agree. I told so many people about my second pregnancy right away and then had a miscarriage 2-weeks later and had to play clean up. When I got pregnant a third time, we didn’t tell family until 12-weeks and then didn’t say anything to friends/colleagues until after 20-weeks. I was lucky that it was tunic season by that point so I could hide it wearing dark tunics lol.

        But while I’ve lived that perspective, I think with Munn’s desire for attention, part of it is vanity with not being seen while “fat” and part is her desire to want people to ask her about it/increase the pap value of getting a shot of her while pregnant.

    • BeanieBean says:

      Yeah, that didn’t sound so good to me, either; even if it’s part of her Hollywood-mindset of always wanting to look fabulous at all times (assuming this is the case, I have no idea) & she equates being pregnant with being ‘fat’, a cardinal sin in Hollywood, this seems to be emotionally/mentally unhealthy.

      • E says:

        BeanieBean yeah I do wonder if she feels like buying larger pregnancy clothes in her mind would mean she’s accepted that she’s fat vs the reality of just being a nice healthy pregnant weight. She could already be planning on how quickly she’s going to lose weight and get back into her old clothes, which of course is an unhealthy attitude.

    • minx says:

      I’m not buying that she’s “washing the same clothes over and over.” Nope.

  2. Oh_Hey says:

    This is just messy. While I can’t blame her for JM’s messiness with his marriage and rehab I can blame her for jumping right in the middle and having the nerve to complain about ho she’s perceived.

    Girl you’re having a baby with a still married man with less than 365 day of sobriety on. His admitted timeline still points to cheating. It’s being called messy cuz it is messy.

    Also lolz on “Cheater cheater, potato eater”

  3. milliemollie says:

    They’re the ones claiming they started seeing each other in spring when there’s a pic of her on a red carpet ( Global Citizen event) from May where you can already see a bump.
    It’s not our fault that they’re too dumb to sell believable lies.

  4. Normades says:

    JMG, lol I love it.

    Please JMG, you’re not THAT hot. I guess Angelina Jolie has gotten good reviews and an Oscar because she’s so homely.

    Yea, they both f&cked around and found out.

    • milliemollie says:

      JMG has the Jessica Biel syndrome.

      • Le Nugget says:

        LOL yes, finally someone who agrees with me on JB!

      • Anners says:

        Oh I think everyone agrees with you about JB…and Ms Potato Head. I mean, Megan Fox is a very pretty/sexy woman with weak acting skills, but far fewer people hate her since she’s just out there living her life and not telling the world she’s just too pretty to be taken seriously. I wish they knew it was their attitude that was so off putting.

    • detritus says:

      She’s always talked about it from the very beginning when she was on the video game channel I watched.

      I remember thinking, she’s only here because she’s hot, because she had so little interest in what she was doing.

    • Turtledove says:

      I always find this “I’m too pretty” narrative tobe absolutely bizarre when these women work in a field where they are surrounded by otherworldly beauties of every gender.

      Occasionally there will be an actor who is not conventional gorgeous that has an amazing career, but they are the outliers, generally, when you look at the red carpet EVERYONE is ridiculously gorgeous.

      • elle says:

        IIRC, Elizabeth Banks tried that on as well, which made me think, “Have you SEEN anyone else in Hollywood?”

      • ElleV says:

        I do think there’s a point to be made about the lower status/respect in Hollywood afforded to women who market their beauty as “hot” (to appeal exclusively to men) versus “beautiful” (to appeal to both men and women).

        Take Megan Fox – she probably travelled further than her talent would have carried her because she leaned into “hot” marketing and roles, but it also meant that she was (unfairly) punished for pushing back on the sexist crap that career path entailed.

        I’m sure JMG is finding the “hot/cool girl” pipeline to fame very limiting, but I’d argue that has more to do with the way she and her managers have chosen to market her beauty than people writing her off for being “too pretty.”

        It’s also possible that the “beautiful/relatable” pipeline wasn’t open to her because she lacks the particular look/talent/personality that career path requires, but again, that’s different from being “too pretty” to be taken seriously.

      • ElleV says:

        I’ll also add – we’re going to through a renaissance of “hot” early 00s celebs remarketing themselves as more complex characters (with Meghan Fox being a trailblazer)

        Maybe JMG should take a hard look at what they’re doing and try selling us something other than “defensive about my sus relationship choices and career that hinged on being not like other girls”?

    • MarcelMarcel says:

      @ElleV ITA
      I will say that I have noticed my ridiculously beautiful friends be bullied by insecure people (both men & womxn). My friends do get passive aggressive comments etc… Some of them vent to me about how much it sucks. AND they manage to simultaneously acknowledge that they benefit from beauty privilege.

      Celebrities like O.M. & Jessica Biel just need to hire better PR agents and get more better media training imo. The “hot/cool girl” pipeline to fame can be really limiting but I’ve seen celebrities bank on it for decades. Or use it to build up a good nest egg before they’re no longer considered hot by the public. I saw her in the Newsroom and thought she was good. but I have no idea if she has range. I do think her career would fare better if she stopped acting like she’s being victimised due to her good looks.

      • ElleV says:

        absolutely! I find people bully/other anyone who looks too *different* from a given norm or in-group, regardless of whether that difference is considered conventionally attractive

        I’d guess the women who make the most of the hot/cool girl pipeline tend to have some self-awareness about what they’re actually selling, view it as a means to other ends and leverage it accordingly

        if JMG’s management were wise, they’d encourage her to lean into defining herself in the positive – the things she is passionate about and shares with her fans – rather than in the negative. when you take away “not the other woman, too pretty to be taken seriously” who is she?

      • Monica says:

        I’ve never been top tier in looks but have no problem with beautiful people as long as that’s not all they are. All humans are attracted to beauty, after all. Shitty personalities are not beautiful.

  5. Jenns says:

    It’s clear by her actions on the past that she is obsessed over what people are saying about her. So I have no doubt she’s been scrolling through Twitter and Reddit and reading all of the reactions to this mess. And it is a mess–so much so that John had to go on Seth Meyers to explain the situation and is now cracking jokes about “mixed reactions” to the baby news during his routine. And it I remember correctly, he also use to crack jokes about his wife during previous comedy routines. And look how that turned out!

    Anyway, I’m no fan of hers, but I wish her luck. She’s going to need it. Because bringing a baby into an already messy relationship is never easy.

  6. LaUnicaAngelina says:

    Okay- I keep suggesting CB-branded t-shirts. “Cheater Cheater, potato eater” is definitely t-shirt worthy! 😂

    • LaraK says:

      I want a tshirt with “specific pubic signs” on it cuz that’s how I first read it and had to reread four times to get it right.

  7. Cat C says:

    She’s a whackadoodle.

  8. Deanne says:

    So now she’s going to play victim? What a piece of work.

  9. Monica says:

    Boo-freaking-hoo. Why am I not surprised she’s playing the sympathy card.

  10. Red Weather Tiger says:

    Poor me! No one is happy that I got knocked up by my famous addict married boyfriend!! Boo hooey hoo! Now let me throw the word “narrative” in so I sound smart and remind everyone that I’m punished for my beauty. Did I mention John tells me his jokes BEFORE he tells them onstage? That’s right. He’s so so funny speaking of his grave ambivalence about our predicament. Now one more round of tears for my chiiiiiild and can’t we just all love me???

  11. Veruca Salty says:

    Yeah, she’s not flaunting the bump or embracing the pregnancy by not buying maternity clothes or whatever because deep down m she knows it’s shrouded in shame and controversy. Which is kind of sad but she made her choices.

    • JT says:

      Right. It’s hard to flaunt a pregnancy when your man is still married to his wife, whom he just separated from this year. Can’t have people remembering how this relationship started.
      ETA Love your name. Veruca Salty legit made me smile.

    • Bishg says:

      Exactly. The one and only reason why she doesn’t gram her whole pregnancy is that she’s aware that people would come for her in the comment section. As her history with the FUG girls taught us, she doesn’t handle criticism well, so she needs to downplay her pregnancy. Btw, based on her candid pictures from late August or so, I’m almost convinced she must have already given birth.

      • Meg says:

        Oh yeah theyll be coy about the birthrate for sure due tonthat, not wanting privacy but to rewrite this timeline

  12. Don't Take It Seriously says:

    I do wonder whether she’s talking about it (however coyly) to distract from the wrongful death suit she’s facing. I mean, if she didn’t want to talk about it, she can just say, ‘no comment, I chose not to talk about my personal life when promoting a professional project’

    • MarcelMarcel says:

      She’s facing a wrongful death suit? I’m googling it! I get why she’s unpopular… but say what you want about O.M. at least she isn’t dull.

  13. Merricat says:

    When I was pregnant, my hormones were so crazy that missing the weather forecast could make me cry.
    I don’t envy what she’s going through. I’m not saying she’s not meeting her karma with this dog and pony show, but I do feel for her as a pregnant human.

    • detritus says:

      I was thinking that too. I hope she can be well and disconnect from social media etc for her own health. Pregnancy isn’t easy or kind to women

    • MarcelMarcel says:

      I have never been pregnant and sometimes forgot what an intense experience it is. I appreciate this reminder to be more compassionate. I don’t envy her either.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        In regards to paid leave, I read a post from a woman who had 2 children and had medical issues after both of them. It really is a brutal process to create and deliver a child. I wish our country would recognize our horrific maternal mortality rate and take care of our mothers before and after pregnancy (and I’m childless).

  14. CROOKSNNANNIES says:

    I have no fondness for JMG, but reading the interview, she didn’t come off as all woe is me no one takes me seriously because I’m so pretty, the way Emily Ratajkowski has. Instead, she pointed to the fact that she was on Maxim and didn’t say anything specific about her looks (broader commentary). I think there’s a stand-alone argument that women who appear on a magazines like that aren’t taken seriously – Megan Fox, for one.

    So yeah, I think she’s a deluded, denying asshole and maybe she’s said that before, but she didn’t say it here. In her case I think she’s not successful because she is a bad actress with a bad attitude. But I do think there are some women who aren’t taken seriously because of magazine spreads, etc.

  15. AmelieOriginal says:

    I don’t think she’s being coy, she realizes oversharing everything a la Hilaria Baldwin about her pregnancy is not something the general public is interested in due to John Mulaney’s rabid fanbase and sympathy for his ex-wife. She clearly has no common sense since she hooked up with a barely separated married man right after he got out of rehab and pretty much immediately got knocked up, among other idiotic things she’s done in the past. But she isn’t so tone deaf that she is going to flaunt her pregnancy out in public and be all “look at me, look at me” on social media. Also since she’s promoting this movie and she realizes this is all people want to talk about in interviews, posting about her pregnancy and talking about her baby will completely overshadow promotion of this movie (which it’s already doing anyways). She’s learning the very hard way that actions have consequences and that no, most of us aren’t celebrating her pregnancy, nor do we want to hear about it. The only thing I wish for her is a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby and a lot of luck, because she’s going to need it.

  16. FrodoOrOdo says:

    This all reads as the rantings of someone who finally bagged an A list someone but is big mad they can’t exploit it and draw attention to herself in all the usual ways because the situation as a whole. So now she doesn’t want to share anything, which ma’am, we do not care.

  17. canichangemyname says:

    I kind of forgot about her until this situation. I’m no fan of cheating, but she’s not the first celebrity to have a shady timeline about when a relationship with a married person started. It does happen. But I do feel like everyone expecting a baby should be able to enjoy that time in peace and health and a congratulations. So I wish her that, and healing for JM’s wife and JM.

  18. Whatnow says:

    IMO I believe she wanted to have a baby and John was convenient.
    I don’t think being a single parent bothers her one bit .
    She is reaping what she sows.
    If she had better personality, more talent, and liked by anyone she could get work with Reese/Aniston or at least a part on one of the hundreds of streaming projects happening today.

  19. bobafelty says:

    SHOCKING TWIST….John Mulaney is NOT the father! The father is a japanese potato!

    • EveV says:

      LMAO! I love that a commenter always finds a way to sneak in the Japanese potato bit, in a clever way. Thanks for the laugh

  20. Beth says:

    If my pregnancy and relationship timeline was a constant question in the public eye, I’d clarify the timeline so I could take the wind out of the speculative sails and move on. Of course, if the timeline I want the public to believe and the actual timeline were different, then I’d probably want to dance around the topic and “pull back and to not play the game at all.”
    I’m sure the FUG girls would have appreciated her pulling back and not playing games but, you know, I guess doxxing people was just something she was publicly comfortable with.

  21. els says:

    ” Cheater cheater potato eater.” Lmao
    “(counterpoint: she’s not funny and she’s a bad actress).”: True, I don’t care for John Mulaney in particular (Although dick move on his part for cheating on his wife) but I never liked her, not funny and seems so mean and full of herself. And no need for her to explain the timeline. Everything has been messy from the start and everybody know.

    Also, being pretty doesn’t mean you can’t be take seriously as an actress enough with this, stunning women like Angelina Jolie, Charlize Theron are amazing actresses to name a few

    • Meg says:

      Exactly! How has Halle berry ever gotten good reviews then? ‘im too pretty to be taken seriously’ BS

  22. Jules says:

    she is a publicist’s nightmare

    • Meg says:

      I just told a friend imagine what his and her PR people said, really tour dumping this in my lap to cleanup? Jesus i need a raise

  23. Milly Pierce says:

    I agree 100% this is a all round dumpster fire.
    This poor baby is entering a mess. I said from the beginning John should at least wait a good amount of time before he try to date or wear a friggin condom dude. More proof he’s still self destructive.
    Olivia made it know she had her eye on him even when he was engaged.
    The fact he saw her but went “Nah, I good. I’m marrying this chick” hurt her ego.
    Despite the mess that’s going on between the two exes, there’s still a lot of emotional baggage a outsider should just run away fast from.
    I’ll never understand people who fall in head first with someone in the middle of divorce and fresh out of rehab. Do you love being in turmoil? Do you love co starring in a sh#tshow?

  24. Tiffany :) says:

    “she blames her own mixed reviews as a comedian on the idea that she’s so pretty and sexy and therefore people hate her”

    Oh FFS.
    Her sense of humor is MEAN, that’s why her “comedy” didn’t take off. She’s like Trump in that regard. The list of things she has said in books and interviews that are just totally mean spirited is really long! Rolling my eyes at her perpetual victim-hood,

    • ElleV says:

      for someone claiming to be a comedian, she’s always come across as deadly serious about herself which fits with the profile of someone who sees comedy as making fun OF other people, rather than laughing WITH them about shared human foibles

      can you imagine how differently this would play if she acknowledged the situation with a bit of humour or self awareness? like a commenter said above “actually it’s not a baby, it’s a Japanese potato” would make me like her 1000x more.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        ElleV, that’s a great line! You’re way funnier than her, that’s for sure!

      • ElleV says:

        lol all credit goes to bobafelty for this gem “SHOCKING TWIST….John Mulaney is NOT the father! The father is a japanese potato!”

    • E says:

      Thank you! I’m so tired of her whole I’m so sexy schtick. She doesn’t actually have any real sex appeal so instead she has tried soooo hard to show off her cleavage and legs in order to get as much attention as possible. “If I keep saying I’m sexy maybe people will start believing it!” Her comedy and acting never took off because she is not funny whatsoever has no talent. She also likes to brag about how smart she is, which again I’ve never seen any evidence of. Just invest your millions wisely and get out of the public eye already. Or not so we keep having all this gossip fodder.

  25. why? says:

    The only way to win is so shut up and stop leaking stories about John’s divorce, gloating in every interview about how she won because she is pregnant with his first child, setting up the initial pregnancy photo-op because she was afraid that John was going to make back up with his wife, and releasing old staged photo-ops with John when people expose that John has dumped her.

  26. Mmmmm... says:

    Look, I know she’s “the other woman” which is only okay if it’s Angelina Jolie apparently, and she might not be likable at all but can we not call her “John Mulaney’s girlfriend”? She’s famous and well known and therefore It’s sexist – regardless of whether she’s a good person or not.

    • CROOKSNNANNIES says:

      They call her that for good reason- she has a history of looking up posts about herself and doxxing bloggers who didn’t even criticize her as a person, just said they didn’t like some outfit she wore. She goes after people because she’s desperate for validation. Celebitchy is just protecting itself.

    • milliemollie says:

      Her not being called by her actual name has nothing to do with John Mulaney or her being “the other woman”. It has been explained here more than enough. There’s is nothing sexist about it.

    • whatWHAT? says:

      please see previous posts on this person to understand why she is not referred to by name.

  27. Darn it tho – I loathe JMG but the line about how hard it is to have a first pregnancy and hear anything besides “congratulations” got to me.

    • ElleV says:

      it sucks to be mired in a messy situation, even if it’s self-inflicted, especially when you’re preg, so on that front I feel for her and hope she finds some peace

    • Meg says:

      That stood our for me too, meaning people in their orbit are saying not so nice things to them directly which if you took the seth myers interview as a peak inside his friends youd think they were all supportive-
      but again they created this situation themselves so-

  28. Vic says:

    She is 41 so i am thinking she is probably happy with a baby as the end game and not this john M guy. I am also in my 40s so not trying to shade, just mentioning that conceiving naturally and as fast as they did is pretty much a blessing.

  29. Ange says:

    “There’s no way anyone could know what any of his relationships were or what our relationship is,” she says — speaking in the present tense, for the record.”

    A relationship doesn’t have to be romantic for it to be current, jussayin’

  30. Twinkle says:

    1) I’ve never found her sexy, beautiful nor funny. She would try to generate laughs by mocking her Vietnamese mother’s accent. That’s stooping low.
    2) Don’t they say that an addict should not get involved for the first year out of rehab? Shame on both of them for cheating. Shame on her for jumping on a newly, recovering addict. Stupid people.

  31. Fabiola says:

    The health of an unborn child is related to the mother’s health so I wish her nothing but peace and happiness at this time. People make mistakes but we can’t go back in time. There’s an innocent baby on the way and that should be the main focus. Pregnancy is hard enough I’m the best of situations so I have a lot of compassion for her. Olivia should just focus on her baby. If her and John are meant to be that’s great but if not they can focus on just the baby.

  32. nicegirl says:

    ‘Cheater cheater potato eater’ is sending me into fits of much needed laughter. Omg Thank you

  33. MarcelMarcel says:

    Just wanted to say that I find her off putting. Because she’s acting like she’s been victimised for being pretty… instead of like examining her life choices and rethinking her career strategy.