Chris Pratt doesn’t want to be called Chris: ‘That’s not my name’

In petulant toddler news, Chris Pratt does not want to be called Chris because, according to him, it’s not his name. Even though it actually is. In an interview with SiriusXM, not-Chris revealed that his actual friends call him by his last name, Pratt, or his initials, CP. Okay…? He’s been famous for years and I think this is the first time he’s actually mentioned it.

Would a Chris by any other name still smell as sweet?

Chris Pratt — dinosaur fighter, intergalactic crusader, voicer of Mario — is known for many things, particularly being a member of the Hollywood Chris Club (HCC), co-chaired by Chris Evans and Chris Hemsworth with a permanent seat on the security council for Chris Pine.

These young, incredibly photogenic, white, cis, straight men have had the cinematic world in their vice-like grips for a decade, but it turns out, there’s been an impostor amongst their ranks. In a recent interview with SiriusXM’s Pop Culture Spotlight With Jessica Shaw, Pratt came out as a non-Chris to those who know him best.

“What do they call you?” Shaw asked The Terminal List star. “Pratt?”

“Yep. Pratt. CP. You know, CP. ‘Hey, CP.'” Pratt, or CP, answered. “But no one calls me Chris. My friend, Chad. I went golfing with my friend, Chad, my pastor the other day and he was like, ‘No one calls you Chris? I’m gonna call you Chris. Alright, Chris. You’re up.’ And I was like, ‘No, it feels weird. It’s not my name. Don’t call me Chris.'”

And just like that, Chris Pratt is a 2008 bop from the Ting Tings.

But, to be absolutely clear, Chris is his name. Mary-Jo-Lisa? It’s all the same.

With one less acting Chris (one less Chris to fryyyyyyyyyyy) does this mean there’s an opening in the HCC? Obviously, Evans and Hemsworth, your buff Marvel Chrises, aren’t going anywhere, and neither is Pine, your pilot Chris in the worlds of DC and Star Trek. But what about the secret (and best?) Chris in the game?

Justice for Chris Messina! The moment he broke out that Aaliyah “Try Again” choreography on The Mindy Project, all other Chrises disappeared in my eyes. And then, of course, there was that time Messina showed his range and went blond, setting the internet’s collective heart — and its penchant for complete inappropriateness — racing.

No offense but Chris Pratt could literally never. It’s time to change up the power dynamic in Hollywood. One Chris at a time.

[From Yahoo! Entertainment]

So is this true or is he just feeling rejected by legions of Hollywood Chris Lovers declaring him to be the Worst Chris? I guess if he’s not Chris at all he can’t be the worst one! But he does seem like the kind of guy to go by his last name or initials, so it could be true. I also don’t go by my first name, but by a portmanteau of my first and middle name, but would never go so far as to say that my first name isn’t my name. It is still technically my name and it’s definitely my Starbucks name. As always, CP just seems petulant and fratty. I was glad this article mentioned the secret, best Chris: Chris Messina. I’ve thought this for a long time. Sure, he’s shorter than the Marvel Chrises, but he has the most handsome Chris face and he can dance! Chris Messina should be the president of Chrises and the rest of the Chrises can be his tall blond Secret Service.

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90 Responses to “Chris Pratt doesn’t want to be called Chris: ‘That’s not my name’”

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  1. K says:

    Pratt is perfect. In the British sense of the word. He’s tiresome.

  2. IForget says:

    LOL @ starbucks name 😀

    So, CP is something we reference at my work, as we deal with police investigations, and it’s not a nice set of letters to see together…. also ugh Crisp Ratt is defo the worst Chris.

    I agree 10000% about Chris Messina, he is defo the best Chris!! He’s so talented, and my gosh he made me swoon when he danced in The Mindy Project <3

    • Salted Watermelon says:

      That was my first thought as well.

    • Lozface says:

      My first thought went straight to the dancing on the Mindy Project. I fell in love with him in that moment. I’ve watched the Aaliyah – Try Again dance way too many times!!!

    • Lens says:

      And as a special education teacher where acronyms are rampant CP stands for cerebral palsy.
      Odd this information comes out after years of stardom.

    • amanda says:

      Yeah, in my experience CP is a reference to child p***. Not a positive abbreviation at all.

  3. Pinkosaurus says:

    Crisp Ratt it is then. 🐀🐀🐀🐀

  4. Shelly Bean says:

    In Australia Prat is slang for an incompetent/stupid person so it makes sense I guess.

  5. mj says:

    I read something the other day of him claiming not to be very religious. Smells like an identity crisis.

    • lucy2 says:

      Didn’t he literally post a photo of himself putting up a big cross on his ranch on Easter a few years ago?

    • Dutch says:

      “I’m not religious but I play golf with my pastor and make sure to mention it even though it has nothing to do with the point I’m making.” Performative faith is such a good look <>

  6. equality says:

    So all those movie credits that say “Chris Pratt” are incorrect or somebody else was in those films?

    • Debbie says:

      Don’t performers get ASKED what they want to be known as, and what their credits should state despite their legal names? This just seems so silly of him to say this now and expect people to retroactively accept that it’s not his name. At least Sean Combs and Prince said outright, “Henceforth, I shall formally be known as” blah.

  7. Noki says:

    He is one of those random unexpected fall from grace stars. He was so beloved and he really took a nose dive into unlikability , his PR must want him to just hush.

    • IForget says:

      He really did seem like the internet’s boyfriend at one stage. The shine is off the apple, and he has said and done some really questionable things. We live and learn!

    • Normades says:

      It’s because people loved his character in the office. Either he was always a tool or it happened when he lost all that weight and became a moviestar.

      • North of Boston says:

        Parks and Rec, instead of the Office US. But yeah. Though he himself seemed cool and funny for a couple of years there. It changed not long after he got in shape, so maybe it was his inner douche-bro hidden under a veneer of goofy dork. (See also guy who seems nice because he isn’t privileged, in charge completely showing his true self when he gets a little money and power)

        This seems 100% like he’s bailing out of being a Chris because of the tag of Worst Chris.

        And yes, Chris Messina seems an absolute doll – talented, funny, great voice, etc.

      • Digital Unicorn says:

        i think he’s one of those people where success changed him – he also didn’t react well to the worst Chris mantel. He’s commented on it a few times, also didn’t his new wife make some comments about it?

        He is but hurt that he isn’t best Chris – as in his mind he is.

      • Kebbie says:

        Yep. People confused him with his character, Andy Dwyer, on Parks and Rec. But something did seem to change also. Like I don’t think Anna Faris married the guy who built a cross on his ranch and goes golfing with his pastor.

      • AngelaH says:

        Parks and Recreation. And yes, I certainly loved him as Andy. But he clearly is no Andy.

      • lucy2 says:

        I feel like he changed also, especially when he got big movies and got all buff. He seems like a different person than he was at the beginning of P&R.
        That’s one of my favorite shows ever, and I do love the character of Andy, but not Chris Pratt.
        I have always heard the P&R people call him Pratt, so I guess that’s what his friends call him, but I don’t know why he’s making a thing of it publicly.

      • Normades says:

        Oh yeah, duh. My bad. Parks and rec. He had such great chemistry with both Ann and April but hasn’t had any since.

    • Sofia says:

      I think he’s one of those people who outside the internet are actually pretty liked. Or at least tolerated. He continues to get roles, his co-stars continue to sing his praises and there’s a certain section of people who think the way he does and they support him. And those same people love to use him as an example of “cancel culture failing” and stick it those “crazy leftists”.

  8. Laura says:

    Cool so we can meet him halfway and just call him Douchebag?

  9. Anna says:

    YES! Chris Medina all the way. 🔥🔥🔥

    • Saba says:

      Chris Messina? Hell yeah!

      Honestly, The Mindy Project is one of the most consistently hilarious shows that is completely underrated, and I’m amazed how good Chris is in it.

  10. North of Boston says:

    I now have that Ting Tings song playing in my head LOL!

  11. Hyrule Castle says:

    My mind also went right to the British slang.
    He is definitely a Pratt.

    It’s too bad, I enjoyed his sense of comedic timing in the marvel movies, but he’s definitely a self important pratt.

    Plus, i think he treated Anna like crap, & still does. Pratt pratt pratt.

  12. CC says:

    Please, please legally change your name to just “Pratt” or “CP.”

  13. North of Boston says:

    He is such a tool

    I’m now wondering if his appearance in A: Infinity Saga where Quill shows up primarily to screw up defeating Thanos, be mocked by cool characters and kicked in the groin wasn’t purposeful by people who had worked with him.

    (Yeah, Gamora and Black Widow took bigger hits, but at least their characters weren’t dissed)

  14. CocoBean says:

    Ugh, still totally The Worst Chris

  15. Fancyhat says:

    He was on an episode of Top Chef when he was married to Anna and she was pregnant. They were delightful and so were his parents. I totally think becoming hot and super famous made him a douche.

  16. Anna says:

    He is a prat.

  17. Sofia says:

    God, I find him so insufferable. There’s something about him that just irks me. It’s not just his beliefs it’s just his general vibe and personality to me.

    • Laura says:

      Right? He always just looks so smug and full of himself. He makes my skin crawl. Any picture I see of him and his wife she just looks like a scared deer. He probably has an agreement with her to see other women and gaslights her into thinking it’s “his needs as a man”.

    • elle says:

      Same for me.

  18. ChillinginDC says:

    He’s exhausting. And no one calls you CP. Shut up.

  19. Tee says:

    So he just confirmed that calling him Worst Chris was indeed correct. Jeez, get over yourself.

  20. Emily says:

    Pfft, as if “CP” was ever in contention for best Chris.

    I’m in favour of adding Chris Messina to the ranks.

    • Fabiola says:

      Chris Messina and Chris Pratt are both average looking but Chris Pratt is tall so that makes him more attractive for movies and tv though neither are really attractive. I love the Mindy Project. I wish it was still on.

  21. Nicki says:

    Anyway, the best Chris is Chris(tine) Baransky.

  22. Sasha says:

    Ugh. Why is this guy so beige and yet at the same time the worst.

    • amilu says:

      Seriously. I just read that he came out as non-religious. Like “I don’t know why everyone thinks I’m religious.”

      But here he is — golfing with his pastor. 🙄

  23. Lucky Charm says:

    To me, the best Chris will always be my son. 🙂
    Chris Pratt can go ahead and have a seat. If he doesn’t want to be associated as one of the Chris’s, I’m sure no one will miss him.

  24. Case says:

    This is absolutely in response to being called the Worst Chris. He’s like “well I don’t even go by Chris!” *stomps foot* LOL. Whatever dude. Still the worst Chris.

  25. Midnightatthemuseum says:

    He’s such a disappointment. And I can’t believe he’s unaware that tens of millions of people in the world use ‘prat’ to mean ‘idiot’, if no-one’s told him, that tells you all you need to know.

    • Fabiola says:

      I had no idea prat meant idiot. I don’t think it’s something most people know unless they’re from a country that uses that term.

  26. puddingcup says:

    I love Chris Messina, and would like to put in a vote for Chris O’Dowd too, please!

  27. V says:

    He finally found a way around being Hollywood’s worst Chris.

    • Coco says:

      No he will always be the worst Chris he will hold that title forever no matter how many times he changes his name.🤣🤣

  28. Feebee says:

    I’ll call him Prat. One T.

  29. Mimi says:

    When he was married to Anna I liked him but now he’s just insufferable

  30. @poppedbubble says:

    Of course he hangs out with a Chad.

  31. Shannon says:

    I’ll call him “prat” if he wants. It’s accurate.
    Also is it just me or was that Sirius XM interview written by a squirrel?

  32. osito says:

    Chris Messina can get it anytime, anyplace. I wish we could have a Chris Messina appreciation thread.

  33. tealily says:

    I really thought I couldn’t like this guy any less, but nope, here it is. “Hey guys, call me CP!”

  34. bettyrose says:

    Have you tried not being the worst Chris?

    • Christine says:

      LMAO!! I have been so pissed off at him all day, I need this laugh, bettyrose.

      Just a suggestion…maybe aim to be the middle of the road Chris, Worst Chris?

  35. K says:

    I guess Messina is a decent actor, but kind of forgettable. Right now I can’t think of any of his films/shows besides The Mindy Project, even though I’m sure I’ve seen him in more. To each their own (Chris).

    • North of Boston says:

      I first saw him as one of Brenda’s non-Nate boyfriends on six feet under. Plus he’s been in some romcoms, my brain wants to say one with Mark Ruffalo and Jennifer Gardner but IDK

      ETA, wrong movie … it was Julie Julia

    • Fabiola says:

      In all the times my friends and I would watch the mindy project none of us ever mentioned finding Chris Messina attractive. I didn’t even know his real name. I thought the English physician was better looking but even he didn’t do it for me.

  36. Roo says:

    This is totally a rebranding effort. “I’m not the worst Chris cause I’m not even a Chris. I’m not some religious zealot because I never went to Hillsong.” Whatever you say, Worst Chris. 🙄

  37. Mrs.Krabapple says:

    The best part is the where the report says, “Pratt, or CP, answered.” LOL.

  38. ShoppeGirlMN says:

    Catching my breath. Chris Messina! All. The. Way. I saw him in the Sam Smith music video and had an orgasm. Then saw him in Sharper Objects and that was it. I binged the entire Mindy Project just to see him! More CM please!

  39. Ange says:

    Chris Messina might be a great person but his character in The Mindy Project turned so awful I can’t even look at him anymore.

  40. Christine says:

    You are correct, Sir, your legal name is Worst Chris.

  41. Sunnyjyl says:


    Peridot, I am smitten with your style of writing. You are so very clever.