Remember these photos? They’re from 2018, the very first time Prince Harry, then-Meghan Markle and the then-Duke and Duchess of Cambridge appeared together at a public forum where they had to actually SPEAK. They appeared together at the Royal Foundation’s summit, and it was supposed to be the launch of Kensington Palace’s big “Fab Four” branding. The problem is that the big issue was apparent to everyone in the audience, including the royal reporters. That issue? Meghan was self-assured, beautiful, confident and well-spoken. William and Kate looked dull and sputtering. Hilariously, in his memoir, Prince Harry wrote about a moment that went down behind-the-scenes before the Fab Four went out to speak. It involved Meghan asking to borrow Kate’s lip gloss.
The family that shares lipstick together… In Prince Harry’s forthcoming memoir, “Spare,” out Tuesday, the Duke of Sussex remembers a tense moment between his wife, Meghan Markle, and his sister-in-law, Kate Middleton.
Prince Harry recalls an uncomfortable encounter before the fab four’s Royal Foundation Forum appearance in 2018 when his new wife asked to borrow Kate’s lip gloss when she forgot hers, calling it an “American thing.”
“Kate, taken aback, went into her handbag and reluctantly pulled out a small tube,” the “Harry and Meghan” Netflix star says. “Meg squeezed some onto her finger and applied it to her lips. Kate grimaced.”
Harry goes on to write that they “should’ve been able to laugh about” the moment but the press “sensed” it was “something bigger.”
“I think it had Kate on edge while putting her and everyone else on notice that she was now going to be compared to, and forced to compete with, Meg,” Harry admits.
[From Page Six]
In story after story, William and Kate come across like the dullest, prissiest, most nitpicky people you’d never want to meet. I get that “sharing lip gloss” isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, much like the hugging issue. Harry seems to think that these things are uniquely “American.” They’re not – I wouldn’t hand out my lip gloss to just anyone. But Meghan and Kate were literally about to become sisters-in-law!! You hug your sister-in-law and you let her borrow your lip gloss without making a prissy face about it. This too was probably some huge “protocol disaster!!” The monarchy will fall if the sacred princess lip gloss is shared with an American peasant! Y’all know that Kate simply didn’t want a Black woman touching or using her makeup too.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.
173969, Prince Harry, Meghan Markle, Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge and Prince William, Duke of Cambridge attend the first annual Royal Foundation Forum held at Aviva in London. London, United Kingdom – Wednesday February 28, 2018. Photograph: Ã?Â© Avalon.red, PacificCoastNews. Los Angeles Office (PCN): +1 310.822.0419 UK Office (Avalon): +44 (0) 20 7421 6000 email@example.com FEE MUST BE AGREED PRIOR TO USAGE,Image: 534296456, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: WORLD RIGHTS, DIRECT SALES ONLY UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE IN CAPTION – Fee Payable Upon Reproduction – For queries contact Avalon.red – firstname.lastname@example.org London: +44 (0) 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles: +1 (310) 822 0419 Berlin: +49 (0) 30 76 212 251 Madrid: +34 91 533 4289, Model Release: no, Credit line: Avalon.red, PacificCoastNews / Avalon
The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, Prince Harry and Ms. Meghan Markle to attend the first Royal Foundation Forum Under the theme ‘Making a Difference Together,’ the event will showcase the programmes run or initiated by The Royal Foundation, and will include a number of delegates who have been involved in key projects. The Royal Foundation’s . programmes to date include Heads Together, the Invictus Games, and United for Wildlife. The Duke and Duchess, Prince Harry and Ms. Markle will appear on stage together to discuss why The Royal Foundation was set up, the projects they are currently working on, and their ambitions for the future. During the event, Their Royal Highnesses and Ms. Markle will also meet with other forum attendees. Ms. Markle will formally become the fourth Patron of The Royal Foundation after her and Prince Harry’s wedding.,Image: 534748353, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: NO UK USE FOR SEVEN DAYS – Fee Payable Upon Reproduction – For queries contact Avalon.red – email@example.com London: +44 (0) 20 7421 6000 Los Angeles: +1 (310) 822 0419 Madrid: +34 91 533 4289, Model Release: no, Credit line: – / Avalon
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 28: (L-R) Prince Harry, Meghan Markle and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge attend the first annual Royal Foundation Forum held at Aviva on February 28, 2018 in London, England. Under the theme ‘Making a Difference Together’, the event will showcase the programmes run or initiated by The Royal Foundation.
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 28: (L-R) Prince Harry, Meghan Markle and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge attend the first annual Royal Foundation Forum held at Aviva on February 28, 2018 in London, England. Under the theme ‘Making a Difference Together’, the event will showcase the programmes run or initiated by The Royal Foundation.
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 28: Meghan Markle, Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge and Prince William, Duke of Cambridge attend the first annual Royal Foundation Forum held at Aviva on February 28, 2018 in London, England. Under the theme ‘Making a Difference Together’, the event will showcase the programmes run or initiated by The Royal Foundation.
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 28: Prince Harry, Meghan Markle, Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge and Prince William, Duke of Cambridge attend the first annual Royal Foundation Forum held at Aviva on February 28, 2018 in London, England. Under the theme ‘Making a Difference Together’, the event will showcase the programmes run or initiated by The Royal Foundation.
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 28: Meghan Markle and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge attend the first annual Royal Foundation Forum held at Aviva on February 28, 2018 in London, England. Under the theme ‘Making a Difference Together’, the event will showcase the programmes run or initiated by The Royal Foundation.
Doesn’t Kate have girlfriends! OMG! Getting upset over a freaking lip gloss- how many times have each of us borrowed make up from our friends/relatives! Kate is a whole other level of stuck up.
Add to that the gloss comes in a squeeze tube. Meg squeezed some onto her finger. No lips, no cooties, sheesh
Umm everytime I’ve used a tube lipgloss and my finger you still wipe it on your finger. There’s still contact. And I don’t trust other peoples hands. Especially if they come in contact with something that I use on my mouth
So I will admit I cringed at asking to use someone else’s lip gloss…
But then relaxed when reading she put it on her finger.
I admit I do not like sharing things that touch my face with others. And sharing with a best friend or roommate and someone you don’t know well isn’t the same (even if you’re the reason you don’t know that person well). To a finger is much better, but not everyone assumes that is going to be the way to share lip things. Meghan would be oodles more comfortable with it as well being an actress and working on sets where it isn’t even your makeup, and presumably having female friends who aren’t her mother.
So I can’t fault Kate for not being comfortable… but she should just have said that and declined instead of defaulting to the poor put upon Kate routine she’s perfected with William (and probably her mother). There is nothing wrong with “I’m sorry, I don’t like sharing intimate things” but there is with obliging and making a big show of how much you didn’t want to do it like you’re a small child. She is not a child. She is though, someone who is very aware of class and social hierarchy which probably played more of a role than any germ worries.
I can’t believe I’m going to do this, but to defend Kate here, there’s a good chance Meghan didn’t know Kate’s lip gloss was in a tube unless she’d seen her put some one. And using chapstick-like lipgloss belonging to someone else is a little cringe.
That said, it was in a tube. There’s no reason for Kate to freak out. And if she didn’t want Meghan’s finger touching the top of her lipgloss, use a tissue afterwards and wipe the germs off. For goodness sake. So much drama from the Wales.
So there’s a real simple solution here to the whole touching-it-to-her-finger thing:
“Here ya go, Meghan. It’s all yours. Keep it. I have a bunch more at home.”
Kate is ultra-wealthy. She can afford to give away a tube of lip gloss if it helps out her sister-in-law.
Yeah, I’m American and not very germophobic and I find this a weird/off-putting request for Meghan to make. Even with the squeezing on finger. I don’t share products like that with anyone outside my household. Presumably at this point Meg had also met Kate a few times and realized she was I dunno…uptight? So this seems like an even more puzzling thing to ask of her.
And yes, the gracious thing to do is say “keep it” but I’ll be honest, I would be taken aback enough by such a request that I don’t know if I would do that.
Sharing lip gloss isn’t my thing too anymore. Maybe because of post-pandemic stress disorder LOL. Even just squeezed on the finger.
I agree with whoever said Kate should have let Meaghan keep it. Personally I would have employed some self-effacing humour and been like “look I have a lip gloss addiction and about ten of the same ones at home, you keep that one so you have something to use while you’re here!” Simple, gracious, no botox-y grimaces required
So it’s still disgusting to a lot of people. Fair enough. The issue seems to be that Kate’s supporters tout that as a princess she never puts a foot wrong. But here, she visibly makes a disgusted face when Meghan puts on the lip gloss, telegraphing her thoughts for all to see. There could have been so many ways for Kate to respond to Meghan asking to use the lip gloss, but she chose to or was unable to keep the disgust off her face while knowing this was the first video of her with her soon to be SIL. And that’s how she reacts. Decorum and diplomacy my ass.
I’ve borrowed lip gloss using the finger technique and you don’t actually have to wipe your finger on it. There might be a little bit of gloss left on the applicator, but it’s miniscule – and much better than putting your finger on someone else’s gloss.
Keep in mind also that for someone who has been in film/tv, a backstage sharing of gloss isn’t a rarity. Ask a pageant girl.
All Kate had to do was throw it out and get another one.
Meghan didn’t ask to use her roll-on lipgloss after eating a bag of Cheetos, she asked to borrow a dab for a quick touch-up before a public event that was going to be filmed. If Kate had such a problem with it, have Meghan keep it or just throw it away afterwards. I always have at LEAST 2 lip-somethings in my purse, I don’t believe for a second Kate didn’t have a backup or an assistant with a backup or five. For someone who snootily carries herself like an etiquette queen, Kate should have sucked it up and been polite and generous instead of making faces like a child at a simple request from your soon-to-be sister-in-law.
I keep coming back to this and am getting angrier and angrier (incandescent, even). Kate is a woman who has fake-guffawed across the globe and literally been caught freeze-posing for photo ops. Surely someone as obsessed with her image and appearance as she clearly is would recognize that someone (her future sister in law, no less!) might want to touch up their appearance before going before a live audience for a filmed event. Surely! And you cannot tell me that Kate doesn’t have an assistant or five with an entire emergency kit complete with outfit changes, makeup, wiglets, and yes, lipgloss, on stand-by at all times.
I completely get people having non-racist, totally reasonable qualms about sharing makeup or lipgloss. This is not that. It’s a completely different situation in which a public figure with an entirely stage-managed existence pretended to not understand why someone else might care how they look. Give me a BREAK, Kate.
FFS, I used to give kids in my class vaseline or aquifer for chapped lips all the time. Because of germs, I squeezed some on a Kleenex or bit of paper towel and they threw it away after. DONE!.
When I was a kid, my friends and I always swapped makeup, even gloss pots. As kids, you didn’t think of germs like we do now. *NOW* I wouldn’t do it unless I squeeze some on a Qtip or a tissue, even to my own sister, whom I love to death. She does go out in the world, interacts/even kisses others… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I’d still do the Qtip or tissue, or just give it to her.
God she’s such a B****!!!!
It was her sister-in-law! You can share lip gloss with family.
I have such mixed feelings about this. Even pre-COVID, I was super squirmy about sharing lip products but would always say yes if my friends and I were in the bathroom and they asked to borrow stuff. I was never the one to ask but never refused either…maybe I’m a people pleaser, but COVID put a thankful end to that.
There are so many layers to Meghan and Kate’s situation based on their respective backgrounds. I actually don’t think there is a clear villain here. Meg was an actress who basically lived in a makeup chair. She has tons of girlfriends and went out/got photographed all the time; it’s just natural for her to share emergency lipgloss before an event or a night out and she was being wholly herself…she really is that self-possessed, confident and familiar with everyone.
Kate, on the other hand, has her own dedicated makeup team and probably never had to share anything once she became a duchess. She makes carefully curated public appearances where she is never without lipgloss. She likely found Meghan’s behavior incredibly improper and gauche, especially if there was already a lot of underlying resentment there. This is a lady who was shocked that Miles Teller would ask her anything on the red carpet; can you imagine how a request to borrow lipgloss reads to her?
I’m beginning to see the full picture of cultural tangents. Derangers will berate Harry for talking about lipgloss but this level of detail is astounding. Am LIVING for it!
This is where I land too, but you said this a lot better than I could!
Lux: Yes, perfectly said! I don’t like borrowing or loaning makeup either but I can see where Meghan thought that being in the same family and being working royals meant that they operated as a kind of team, that Kate would have her back – oh, here, use my gloss, just keep it, I don’t need it back, etc. To make a face and say nothing emphasized her wish to NOT have a connection with Meghan. A very small, telling detail.
I can see this from both sides as well. The one thing that irks me though is all the talk about culture crash between american / british. From what I’ve read so far it isn’t so much about american versus british, it’s more a crash between different cultures in different social circles. By that, I don’t mean upper class versus peasants, it’s more like sociable and including versus uptight and excluding.
All good points made. But the cultural differences didn’t require a smear campaign against Meghan and that’s where I land. Kate is just a petty, hateful piece of work.
I totally agree @Bren-! Smearing someone because they are different than yourself is hateful and mean. What’s come up so far of the meetings between Meghan and Keen is totally benign things that anyone with an ounce of common sense would shrug at, and move on. It’s the fact that Harry found love, that he married someone Willnot told him not to marry, a woman of substance who dared talk back to Willnot, and didn’t see herself, or behave like, a subhuman in their presence that made them hate her.
I agree with Lux about the cultural & occupational differences illustrated here. I’m American & I’d consider it pushy if anyone I didn’t know very well asked to borrow lipgloss. I’d have said “I need lipgloss & forgot mine” and waited for the other woman to offer hers. If she didn’t offer, I’d suck it up & live without lipgloss for the moment.
Am I the only person who keeps an unopened tube of cherry chapstick in my bag for just such emergencies? I buy them in bulk at Costco. It’s either cold, damp and windy or hot and dry where I live; Chapstick is essential. Doesn’t every woman keep a little bag of “necessities” in their purse? I’m through the “Pause,” but I still carry wrapped pads just in case a younger girlfriend or anyone might need one. And yes, I will hand you toilet paper under the stall wall if you happen to go into a stall without checking the dispenser first.
I do that too! I’ve got a couple of unopened lip glosses, an unopened thingy of Visine, a sealed package of hand sanitizer wipes and some pantie-liners. I’m past the ‘pause too but use a moisturizer for my lady bits twice a week and sometimes it leaks a bit. Honestly, Kate sounds like the type of person who has to shower 6 times a day.
i do that with pads and tampons (I also volunteer at school a lot with a lot of middle school girls who are just starting periods, so I feel its safest, lol), but it never occurred to me with chapstick. I’m going to start.
Sigh… you DO have a square to spare!!!! 😍
@thefarmerswife Chapstick is always great to have around, if only that’s what they want! In the bathroom for us, it’s all about touching up color, and there’s a whole discovery aspect too (“oh I like that color…I’ve always wanted to try that brand, is it good?” etc). As much as it doesn’t thrill me to share germs, I do like the bonding aspect and I’m not so crazy as to discard the product after a friend uses it, nor would I give it away. I find traditional lipsticks too drying and only like tinted/moisturizing/spf balms and the good ones are $20-$30 each! So as a non-Royal, heck no I’m not giving that away!
But I agree that Kate can afford to. We already know she recoils from touch, let alone sharing something so intimate so really this is not a surprise. I agree with others that it’s not a US vs UK cultural thing, but rather an extravert vs introvert, occupational/relational thing.
Add me to the list. I always have Chapstick in my purse and coat pockets. I get one that’s really moist (like Vaseline). I would have given it to them because I usually have more on me. If it’s a relative or friend, it wouldn’t bother me at all to loan it to them if they were caught out without gloss.
The only reason this incident is a “thing” is because of Wails’ behavior. There were any number of things she could have said, but she did this. None of us should be surprised. The looks she has shown Meghan at different public events shows us who Wails is.
I’m surprised Kate didn’t tell her to keep it and Meghan touched it with her “cooties.” What a stuck up snob.
Oh I’m sure she used a tissue to pick up the lip gloss later as she then threw it away. And then called a servant to take the trash out immediately.
I would not give away my lipgloss. For M, it was bonding. For K, a boundary.
Maybe K was bullied or does not trust people, so she is cold. Meghan always had friends, was popular sorority girl, worked in the entertainment industry, she was liked. They are different people, and i do think they both deserve better.
I stopped liking Harry since Netflix series, the nazi story from the book sealed for me. Will made me wear it? No, buddy, you were 20 on 21.
He has a beef with William. Let them sort it out, they are Charles’ sons after all.
You’ve read the book already? Or are you going by what the tabloids say the book says?
This is about kate being a rude little witch over lipgloss. Oh yeah she thought the Nazi uniform was funny so I guess she’s racist too.
I hope KP paid you well for your paltry efforts.
Dena, the bm would be so proud! You’re now doing their work for them.
People should be allowed to appropriately have their own opinions, even if different, and express them on this site without seemingly snippy comebacks.
Dena has a negative impression after watching a 6 hour docuseries about H&M, so she must be from DM or the palace?
Elizabeth, she specifically mentioned the book in her post. Perhaps you need to go back and read what she said.
Saucy and sassy
Actually, I did read Dena’s opinion and then commented correctly.
She originally said,
“I stopped liking Harry since Netflix series, the nazi story from the book sealed for me . . . ”
I said that Dena has a negative impression based on the Netflix series . . .
Yes, she did mention the book, but clearly stated that her opinion changed due to the tv series.
But your comment reiterates my point. I can’t even mildly defend another commenter’s opinion (just said that everyone has right to opinion) without being incorrectly “corrected.”
Perhaps you need to more closely read comments before attempting to “correct” people.
There is a scene in “killing eve” where Fiona Shaw’s character borrows a lipstick and smears it on so Brits do this too. It’s disgusting, no one should do it. BUT
The classy move for Kate option 1: immediately use the lip gloss herself and never say another word about it OR option 2: never say another word about it.
She put it on her finger! If it was gross for anyone it was gross for Meghan. Again, everyone has different individual views/reactions on this sort of thing (see also hugging), the point to me is always the recurring theme of KKKhate being uncomfortable around Meghan full stop. She didn’t want her around from day one and made that clear.
At least we now know one thing she carries in her ridiculously small bags.
Maybe that’s not all, but I really thought that there was so much more going on behind closed doors, especially between M+H and W+K. This lipcloss scandal confirms our point of view, but is probably not an eye opener for most people..
Exactly! What I’m liking about the leaks of Spare so far, is that it passes the sniff test of not putting Meghan and Harry in this light of pure perfection. If my future sister inlaw was about to be launched in front of a world audience and she seemed nervous because she forgot her lip gloss, I’d offer mine and just let her keep it because i ALSO don’t like germs and I’m pretty sure I’m a rich Duchess who can go buy more. I don’t begrudge Kate for having reservations about sharing lip gloss or hugging. And hey, I wouldn’t even begrudge her if her and Meghan didn’t gel well and weren’t BFFs. It’s that she and William treat Meghan like hugging and asking to borrow lip gloss deserves harassment by her actual inlaws to the point of making her suicidal and inciting violence!!!! Nobody has to like anybody. Nobody has to be besties with anybody. But FFS none of the little idiosyncrasies that Kate and William dislike about Meghan amount to justifying their abuse!
Exactly @slippers4lif! You could call Meghan gauche or to informal but did any of the petty things that have leaked about the Cambridge and Sussex interactions call for Meghan and her kids to be threatened with death?
Also Kate didn’t want to share fashion contacts or lip gloss and didn’t like that they would be compared BUT now she wears a Meghan skin suit when she walks out the house?? Kate gives the appearance of not liking the American and claim she’s unimportant but now copy fashion, hair and gestures.
Math ain’t Mathing
@ SLIPPERS4LIFE I absolutely agree. These are minuscule details that W&K
acted like we’re the end of the world and worth a beheading. They have sticks stuck so far up their behinds that they think they are untouchable.
At first before reading the exact details I would have sided with Kate because putting the lip gloss on her lips would have been a germ issue for me. But she put it on her finger. Besides she could have just said “no worries, here you keep it I have so many of them”.
Kate has a sister too, I don’t get any of this except that she just disliked Meghan from day one. Hell even if a stranger asked me for lip gloss for an event like this I would let them use it and keep it.
@Dena Harry never mentioned that Will made him wear the uniform in the series. He took full responsibility of what he did.
In the book, we don’t know what he wrote because we are only get an out of context snippet (translated from Spanish) by the tabloids who hate Harry.
I don’t share my lipstick or roll on lip gloss either. But if its from a tube I don’t have an issue. I think Kate probably has never had another woman treat her like just one of the girls since she was engaged. I think Meghans comfort levels and showing she won’t bow down to her was the major discomfort. Lol
That part! When has she ever had a friend ever that wasn’t transactional in her adult life? And what’s the point of marrying the heir to the throne of people treat you like basic ol’ Kate and aren’t intimidated and deferential to you (haha)! Remember this was supposed to be her turn to haze someone, IF she even wanted Harry to have another woman in his life.
Kate has money to buy a replacement lip gloss if she felt she couldn’t use it again. That makes it even pettier. She could have said to Meghan “this color looks great on you! Please keep it” and would have looked friendly and generous.
GreenGirl, this shows how much class you have! This would would have been the perfect way to handle it.
That is what secure, assured women with money do. Even if inside they are dying like “I can’t believe she had the audacity to ask me for this!” Outside, they are cool, collected, and know they can buy another. Kate really can’t be taken anywhere.
IKR? Just frickin’ throw it away! I cannot wrap my head around this woman making mountains out of every little detail!
She didn’t like Meghan. William didn’t like Meghan. So they retaliated by …trying to ruin her life?
How can they justify this to themselves? What explanation is there other than racism?
That’s what a true lady would do, but Kate has no class.
Exactly this. A simple, “Please keep it. That’s your color!” would’ve diffused everything. *whispers* I also don’t like to share my makeup with people I barely know.
The “soft diplomacy” part of Kate’s job.
Of course since Kate’s been Duchessing for years and never puts a foot wrong, that smooth politeness even in the face of an awkward moment would come naturally at this point.
Oh, wait ….
If you find sharing ooky, just hand it to her and say “ Keep it.”
This 👆! Interesting that someone named Tom resolved this “crisis”.
Or what I’ve done before if I’m not comfortable using makeup after someone else has used it … like a friend with a cold asks to borrow lipstick, either you use something to scrape off a bit … like they do at most every makeup counter, or let them borrow and tuck it away to swap out for a fresh one later, or as suggested, say, “oh, I’ve got another one, why don’t you keep it in case you need a touch up later”
But if it was gloss that could be squeezed out of a tube, which it sounds like it was, none of that would be necessary. Just hand the person the tube let them squeeze what they need and take it back. If you please, use a tissue to wipe before and after, just to keep the mess down.
Yeah, that’s what I would do, although this seems to have been something in a tube, so having someone squeeze it onto her finger is no big deal.
THIS! FFS, it’s lip gloss. KKKHate can buy them by the gross. Give them to everyone!
I’m going to keep that one handy for next time – thanks for a nice way of handling something that makes my anxiety skyrocket when I don’t know what to do in the moment!
But why should Kate give Meghan her lip gloss? I am a rabid lipgloss wearer, I won’t share with anyone (sorry – germs. I work in health care, I get germs, or I’m just selfish and I have no interest in sharing with friends, family, or anyone). And I definitely wouldn’t give my lip gloss to someone who forgot theirs to “keep”.
The moral of this story, sadly, is that if you like Kate, you think Meghan is wrong. If you like Meghan, you think Kate is wrong.
When really, the moral is, it’s ok not to share your lipgloss if you don’t want to.
Kate doesn’t have to share her lip gloss. She can say she worries about germs, etc. I assume that when you choose to not share your lipgloss, you likely say something like, “sorry no, I don’t share lipgloss. I worry about germs.” Like an adult, as opposed to Kate who let her use it and then tried to get Meghan to kill herself for daring to ask. A presume a rationale person who doesn’t like to share lipgloss doesn’t believe people who ask to borrow lipgloss deserve to feel suicidal and have violent skinheads provoked to murder them.
Headline wise, I grimaced too because I think sharing lip products is disgusting, but the actual story is not near as bad as I was imagining. The fact that it was a tube you could squeeze some out of onto your finger to apply is not disgusting to share and I’d probably share that with anyone I know. Maybe even a desperate stranger who is having a chapped lip crisis because you aren’t sharing any germs, ffs (which is why sharing lip products in general is disgusting to me).
From a squeeze tube, I’d share with a stranger who asked too. Ffs, if a stranger asks, they must really have a need!
That’s what I thought as well. If it was a roller or an applicator gloss, I’d rather not share or let the other person keep it, but if you can just squeeze some out…
Meghan should have said never mind and walked away. Had she but known.
I don’t love people using my lip products but, this is kate we are talking about. If she treats lip gloss like coatdresses she probably has dozens of the same shade that she only wears once.
This was pre covid
I don’t know…. I’m a fan of H&M, but the idea of sharing lip products with anyone makes me squeamish – even people I’m close to/adore.
It was squeezed on her finger, but Kate probably didnt know what she was going to do. The gracious thing for Kate to do would have been to either say let me sqeeze some on your finger or say keep it or toss it later. Weird, but not a big deal.
Yeah, if it bothered me, I’d have just tossed it later. She’s got the money to buy another lip gloss. I’d be a germaphobe if I were pregnant too, but I wouldn’t be openly grimacing.
All the stories seem to have a similar theme, where Kate expected Meghan to treat her as a senior royal and Meghan treated her like a new friend/in-law.
I can’t tolerate it either (squeezing onto a finger or not) and don’t like hugging, but I chalk that up to my anxiety disorder and protecting my comfort in public.
I think you might be onto something about Kate, anxiety seems to be her issue but still that doesn’t excuse her behavior. She honestly seems to think that she’s somehow a more important than Meghan or the rest of younger royals.
Definitely not excusing her behaviour – could have been handled differently for sure. Just commenting on my personal viewpoint were I in the situation.
To be honest, I’m the same.
I actually think finger is worse after all the Covid germ-spreading videos. Unless someone has washed their hands in front of me, the thought of germ-finger to lip grosses me out.
Perspective is important. This was well before Covid. Covid had nothing, repeat nothing, to do with K’s reaction
Even pre-COVID, hands are covered in germs. You don’t touch doorknobs etc with your mouth. I would rather you put my lipgloss directly on your lips than touch my applicator with unwashed fingers.
If Kate has a germ issue, hands are no better than lips, COVID or not.
As a nurse, pre covid or not, I would have either told Meghan to keep it…or tossed it away. I have to turn away when I see someone even biting their own nails. Hands are filthy things at the best of times. This is one point I will give Kate.
Kate has plenty of other lip glosses at home, as do most people who wear lip gloss. The decent thing to do would be to say “here you can keep it”.
I don’t like sharing stuff like that either but I am also not a rude snob.
How many people here have not been in this exact situation and likely from someone who isn’t your sister in law. Let’s stop pretending being a germaphobe excuses rude behaviour.
This is a bit too far. Just because someone asks us for stuff, does NOT mean we are obliged to provide it. This is an especially slippery slope for women who are conditioned to be “nice” and violate our own boundaries to keep the peace.
I’m a fan and supporter of Meghan, but this would have been off-putting for me, too. And she likely asked in a way that made it hard for Kate to say no (asking as though she assumed the answer would obviously be yes). No, lipgloss isn’t that big a deal, but all the sundry little things that we accumulate for our person are ours and we get to decide how to use or dispose of them, including not sharing them with people we don’t know well and/or do not like.
Acting like that toward your sister in law is not taking it too far. There is no way kate didn’t have access to more lip gloss if she was that concerned about germs. She just wanted to show her little grimace because she is a rude snotty woman.
Stop defending a mean woman who has no class.
Same. Like I mark sharing lip gloss or lip anything in the nasty category. I don’t care if it’s a squeeze bottle or not. It’s just not how I roll. I don’t know where everyone’s hands have been (I can hear my mother saying this!)
I’ll share a tampon with a stranger in a public bathroom, but anything that touches my face is a big no no. I’m not only protecting myself, but also the other person.
And I’m really telling on myself, but unless Meg had a wet wipe to clean her hands, it would give me a middle size ick that the rest of the lip gloss is still on her finger. That’s really a ME issue though, I can’t stand having dirty hands.
Fine everyone’s a fan of thr Sussexes and some ppl find this gross – ok. Now is it ok to say Meghan deserved all the racist abuse and Kate is still a poor lamb. Yeesh. Just say gross not my thing, not a diatribe of why Kate is was caught in the mouse corner unable to function like an adult
Who is saying that???
Coming up with excuses for Kate’s rude behaviour toward her own sister in law is saying that.
It’s lip gloss. Just give it to her and get a new one from the thousands of dollars worth of makeup she buys every year.
Folks sharing how *they* personally feel about sharing lip gloss or what *they* might do in a similar situation in their own lives is not “coming up with excuses” for Kate – it’s sharing experiences and trying to understand each other’s different perspectives and viewpoints. If we can’t do that, we can’t have discussions at all.
Kate was pregnant at the time too, right? Probably very wary about germs. I’d have given Meghan the lip gloss and asked her to keep it after use. Don’t want to risk stuff unnecessarily when expecting.
Love Meghan. But I would have grimaced too.
I don’t share lipgloss, but from a tube? Who cares?
Me too…more importantly, I whole heartedly support Meghan but don’t need to love every single thing she does. I would flinch because I don’t like the idea of sharing makeup. I haven’t read the comment in context yet (waiting for the audio book release on the 10th) so I may change my mind, but right now I wish that little episode wasn’t in the book. It’s a distraction.
I’m no Kate apologist but I’m not letting my sister or sister in law borrow my lip gloss. Everyone has their ick and I completely understand how that can be considered a violation. That level of sharing, imho, is very personal and not an “American” thing.
That said, Kate should have communicated her boundary politely and not bottled it up inside/resent Meg for it.
Could have been handled better all around. I’m starting to get the picture that Meghan perhaps gets very comfortable/tactile quickly. Not everyone is so touchy-feely no matter what side of the pond they are from.
Part of me thinks too that Megan was use to promo events and on set make up stations and everyone sharing as a way to work together/move things along. Like, they’re ready to go out on stage and Megan realizes she doesn’t have lip gloss to reapply, any friend would offer something to help or be like, “of course! Can’t let a girl go out without it!”
It’s not an American thing to ask to borrow lip gloss. It’s a sisterhood thing and Kate isn’t a part of it.
If she is not comfortable with Meghan squeezing some on her finger (and there is no contact from what was described) she is just being a rude entitled snot to a future sister in law. A grimace only makes sense if Meghan went and used the applicator on her own lips.
Same. I think Meghan makes assumptions that everybody else is as open and uninhibited as she is (which is neither a good nor a bad thing), but different people have different boundaries. I personally do not want to be hugged by somebody I just met or share my cosmetics with anyone ever, but that can be politely conveyed rather than “grimaced.” None of these incidents needed to escalate to such levels of hate by the Cambridges.
This, exactly this! I’m not a hugger, and I also dislike sharing makeup (even with my sisters and nieces…and it’s come up on vacations and such). But I deal with it respectfully, because I understand that my dislikes are not universal and that others are fine with those things. Someone asking to borrow my makeup isn’t a personal insult, ffs. I don’t make faces, and I definitely don’t get angry and decide I dislike someone when these kinds of things come up.
Likewise, I sometimes do or like things my relatives and friends don’t do or like. They don’t react by recoiling or grimacing. Willy and KHate were actively looking to find something to dislike about Meghan and moreover, they actively wanted her to KNOW how they felt.
is it just me or this is a ridiculously small anecdote to share ? i mean , not to excuse Kate but i would never share lipgloss or ask for anyone’s lipgloss ( shudder at the thought), and she did share it with Meg, so this is a nothing burger to me.
It’s foundation building. It communicates there’s still so much more…
This. Harry is showing us the little ways that Meghan wasn’t welcome in that family, by anyone, even his SIL.
i see your point but i dont think that this interaction shows anything beyond someone not wanting to share comestics with someone else.
If there are numerous well publicised examples of Kate sharing her lipgloss to others but not to Meghan then sure, you’d be right with the foundation building, but this is small and serves no purpose beyond being tabloid fodder and honestly it makes Meghan come across as someone who doesnt really understand social interactions and we know she is more intelligent that the rest of them.
In the NF documentary, she says herself that she was surprised by how formal they were even in private, so how does one go from that to asking to share lipgloss is baffling.
@Dominique This isn’t just a story about lip gloss. Like so many things that are so wrong with W & K, especially W, even if Meghan invaded their small circles of personal space, as family hosts, as experienced institution professionals, as people on the inside with all the resources, the expectation, at least from Harry, was that his brother and SIL would be welcoming and helpful
Honestly Harry is also an experienced institutional professional, also someone on the inside with all the resources, what i’m getting from this is a bit of failure to prepare Meg for what to expect. And quite honestly after the very first interaction with W and K and how cold and formal they are, i feel like Meg should have grasped that K was never going to be one of her girlfriends.
I hope that once i read the book, that there is some clarification from Harry about why he didnt prepare her better, like the national anthem thing for example. i can despise W and K all day long, but Harry for me, had a role to play too.
My fiancee and i are of different cultures, he’s white , i’m south asian, you can be sure that we briefed each other extensively about our families,especially as his mom was not on board of me initially because i also happen to be muslim ( the horror!)
I get it. I’m a mix, Asian and European. When I introduced my then [US American] fiance to family I gave the important do’s /don’ts, one of which he was like WHY am I wearing new, expensive shoes to meet everyone when I’m not going to actually be wearing the shoes when I meet them? Just do it Babe!
My point is, even explaining things sometimes doesn’t make personal interactions perfect. Sometimes it’s a just do it. Clearly Harry didn’t think it was of enough importance to tell Meg to be other than herself. Meg didn’t ask to wear Kate’s underwear. This was a small, small thing. This was a manners thing and even if the impression was that Meg had appalling manners, good manners dictate that we don’t sneer or pull faces in response or make people feel unwelcome or uncomfortable
Yes. And he is showing us the series of microaggressions that Meghan experienced. Any one of those stories may not have much significance on its own, but taken as a group and over time, it is demonstrating a pattern of unkind and cruel behavior towards him and his wife.
The level of detail in this book is not a joke and I am here for it. He is blowing the idea of “a mystique” to smithereens. Love it.
From what I gather, it *is* stuff this small that set William & Kate off and made them hate Meghan. Which is mind-blowing.
I think the small stuff indicates to me that Willy and Khate were actively looking for things to dislike about Meghan. Nothing she did would have been ok with them.
And as I’ve mentioned above, they were also very ok with showing their dislike to Meghan. Grimacing and recoiling and all, Willy sticking his finger in her face while calling her rude (the f***ing irony). They were othering her and deliberately trying to make her uncomfortable and feel out of place.
If Harry noticed this interaction then it was more than just borrowing lip gloss. How many guys are really paying attention to that. But clearly Kate’s reaction was obvious enough for Harry to remember.
Agree. Harry notes that Kate’s response was so over the top that not just he noticed. Like politely say no or let her use it then keep it, but to say yes, then make an obviously uncomfortable or even disgusted face in front of everybody is not cool.
I agree with you on this one @Dominique. I get that Meghan is used to sharing stuff on set or has a group of girlfriends that are okay sharing, but this wasn’t a set and Kate was not her friend. I’ll see in what context this story is set when I read the book but right now as a non- sharing only child I get Kate not being thrilled about this.
You can be a no sharing adult with your stuff and still have the class and manners to be gracious. All the money, titles, and tiaras can’t build a better human being …that takes a kind spirit. I’m glad Harry provides these small incidents to show the bigger picture of their time with family.
This is an old story, but I remember a clip of The Queen’s visit to the White House when Reagan was President.
During a reception, RR and QE were standing with others, chatting and the mike picked up what was being said. RR turned to QE with a very serious, important matters of government face gestured to a server who came near with coffee and asked Elizabeth “is that decaf? I can only have decaf”
She was *The Queen of England *a guest at the event. He was the *host*, asking her to clarify details of beverage service. And apparently showing signs of dementia and confusion at a State Dinner. QE didn’t sneer or recoil or brush him off. She responded graciously and asked the server to bring decaf and flagged Nancy who was nearby and came to help assist RR.
No matter what her faults, that was an example of polite gracious behavior, soft diplomacy in the face of her host’s misstep, frailty.
Kate does not seem the least bit interested in that aspect of her role as FQC
I feel the same way. Kate is legitimately sucky, but this particular story isn’t that big of a deal. According to people here, not sharing lip gloss means you aren’t apart of the sisterhood or you are stuck up or rude. I guess I’m all those things because, nah, I don’t care who you are, I don’t like sharing these types of personal items. I would hate the alternative is to just say “oh well you can just have it” because that’s lame to me as well. I shouldn’t have to share it if I don’t want to, nor should I be required to give it to you if I don’t like sharing.
If you make faces instead of politely declining then yes you are rude. Adults know how to manage situations without grimaces. Clearly kate doesn’t have that skill.
It’s fun and cute and humanizes both Meghan and Kate as well as the commenters on Celebitchy who are either pro or nay on lip gloss finger sharing. In itself a harmless story. But apparently is worth long paragraphs of dissecting if someone is off the rails, off putting etc.
It is amazing the people who ignored the whole “she made a grimace” as a child would do and then pretend that being a germaphobe justifies childish behaviour.
It’s not about sharing the lip gloss but responding to the request. And it tells us a lot about Kate, none of it good.
I was convinced yesterday that this was one of the funny gag quotes that were going around from the book. I’m so glad we’re going to get some snooty Kate info from this book and that she’s not getting a pass. But I will admit, I don’t like sharing lip products either.
Me either but I’m okay with a squeeze tube and you know Kate had just prob applied it in front of Meghan while side-eying her.
At first I was like “Welll…I’d be a little grossed out too”, but then it said she squeezed it out of a tube. So, no Meghan germs were shared. Although Meghan might have gotten Kate germs.
But that’s besides the point. I’m sensing a pattern here, Meghan thought they were peers on equal footing, but the Cambridges demanded deference and were offended. Times that by a hundred fold when the person is a common, lowly American bi-racial actress. AND the fact that she showed them all up. You just know in the car ride home they were screaming “the NERVE!”
I love Meghan. I ride hard for Meghan. But I don’t even share lip gloss with my own sisters. I would have grimaced too, tbh. Harry including this in the memoir is a mistake imho. The derangers will take this as a “see, so much whining!” gotcha moment, and it waters down what I believe are the real, horrible things they endured.
Would you have not then said she could keep it after using it? Kate spends millions on clothes and everything else so the girl isn’t going to miss one lip gloss.
It shows kate was not welcoming even in the small ways from early one.
I have treated strangers better than Kate did with her future sister in law.
I agree about this story being a mistake. (I admit – I am one of the ones sleeved out. I don’t share cosmetics with ANYONE. I still am traumatized by the outbreaks of pinkeye in middle school from shared eyeliners) Everyone calling for Kate to just give her the lip gloss if she was uncomfortable with the germs is weird to me. I don’t care how many lip glosses I have at home, I prepared for the evening and now I have to give my gloss away and be SOL if I need it again because someone else didn’t prepare? I am definitely not that gracious, and I’m not going to fault Kate for being sleeved out by it either.
It was no excuse for Kate grimacing. There is always a diplomatic way of handling a situation like this without being rude. For instance, Kate could have squeezed a bit on a tissue and handed it to Meghan. Kate could have used a bit first then handed the tube to Meghan and told her she could keep it. Meghan wasn’t asking to borrow eye makeup, nor did she look like she had pink eye. Kate has simply hated Meghan from the get-go and this was just one more opportunity to put her down in a very immature and arrogant manner.
So I’ll say that my one SIL would not share with me if I asked. She has anxiety and OCD (legit diagnosed OCD, not the people who just say “oh haha I have OCD”) and one of her big triggers is germs. And she’s not someone who does anything she does not want to do.
If I asked her to borrow lip gloss, she would either say (very nicely, she’s a very polite/gracious person) “oh sorry I’d rather not, I’m not comfortable sharing that” or she *might* give it to me but she would not want it back.
If I didn’t know her, I might be a little taken aback at the refusal, but I couldn’t fault her for it because she would not be at all rude. Kate could have said no. She didn’t need to hand it over and then MAKE A FACE that everyone noticed.
What a miserable existence Kate has. These are little instances but the woman has no sense of humor or the absurd. I’d be put off by her immediately. No wonder Meghan couldn’t win with these two stiffs. Is there one example anywhere of Kate treating Meghan with any kindness? And yes, I wouldn’t share my lip gloss with anyone either, but Meghan probably saw that it was a tube before she asked to borrow some!
When I first saw this headline, I thought, ehhhhh maybe I’ll give Kate this one, I’m not wild about sharing lip gloss either. But then I read it and saw that it was a tube and Meghan put some on her finger and then on her lips. I’d be totally fine with that and wouldn’t hesitate to share that kind of lip gloss. But of course Kate grimaced, she had to share something with the black American.
In all these stories Kate just comes across exactly like we have thought she was for years now….obsessed with hierarchy and status and the least likely to act like a “normal” person.
Also, LMAO that Harry calls her Kate throughout this book. Catherine my ass, hahahhaha.
Harry also calls her Kate in all the interview excerpts so far too.
Honestly I was ready to side with Kate until I saw how Meghan simply squeezed some on her finger. Kate making a face is just being a bitch. It’s not an American thing to ask for lip gloss either so let’s stop with that I am seeing elsewhere.
And the fact that Harry even noticed this incident? Well it clearly wasn’t a subtle face either.
Yeah, it was an obvious reaction for Harry to notice.
Some are saying “well Harry should have prepared her for this.” I’m sure Harry has no idea about the “protocol” surrounding women sharing chapstick/lip gloss. Also, its ridiculous to think that he needed to prep Meghan for every potential scenario bc William and Kare are rude aholes. GARBAGE PEOPLE.
Technically, he outranks her. He could call her Turdilina to her face and probably get away with it. That he doesn’t says a lot.
Honestly how does Kate even walk with the giant stick she has up her ass at all times
This is basically my reaction to this whole thing lol.
No. Come on. I get that once people reveal who they truly are, you read into every single interaction and encounter. I’ve done it. But a few months back, a friend of my sister asked to borrow my lipgloss and I was completely taken aback. I don’t know if I made a face, I may have. She’s lovely and I didn’t want to make it awkward plus we had had a few drinks. It was a tube and I assumed she might put it on her finger. She didn’t. You best believe I threw it out and would have done the same had she actually put it on her finger. You touch my lip product, it goes. It’s so unsanitary, for her as well! I don’t share lip products with even my sister and I never have.
She clearly reacted “badly” before realizing Meghan only put some on her hand. I would react the same way, frankly. And I have.
Well, it’s not like Kate needs to wait for the next paycheck to buy a new one. I’ve been asked to do things I wasn’t comfortable with but one can either hide the discomfort or refuse politely.
The difference is that Meghan didn’t just swipe it on her lips. She did the thing you had expected.
Kate has her millions to pay for a new one – I’m assuming u don’t. U and Kate found the act gross for different reasons – that’s ok
You can tell Keen has never had a single girlfriend in her entire life. This woman is a complete shadow and when someone tries to breakthrough to her, she malfunctions like a robot. Weirdo!
She has a sister though so I do find this odd. She’s never shared lip gloss with her sister?
That’s a good point, Nic919. Forgotten Pippa. Someone related to me would be OK (ish!)
The way people keep projecting and making excuses for Kate is getting irritating. This isn’t about icks or whatever. The point I think Harry was trying to make by telling this story is that there doesn’t seem to be any time when Meghan was a working that Kate ever made an attempt to bond with her. She was cold and distant right from the start.
This!! And as my comment below says, it’s even more egregious on Kate’s part when we look back at how welcoming Harry was to her when she joined the family. She should have been, at minimum, as welcoming to Meghan as Harry was to her. She’s a mean girl and a racist bully.
@Xantha, I really try not to create narratives in my head, but I’ve always believed M&H partly because of how realistically “minor” some of these stories are. And that’s not to say they ARE minor events, it’s just bullies like to demean you in a way that has plausible deniability. But the fact he is even bringing it up is because it obviously felt extremely wrong in the moment, not just a germaphobe thing/ick.
When I left a truly horrific workplace, it was so hard for me to explain how nasty some of the behaviour was and this lip gloss example is exactly the kind of stuff it was! It’s so easy to dismiss a grimace “oh I didn’t even know I did it!” when it was in fact perfectly timed in a context (i.e. asking to share a lipgloss, or a cookie) to make you feel totally inhuman or disgusting.
I agree it’s a tube of lip gloss being used for a huge public presentation not a night on the town. What’s context, what’s grace – it’s all me me me me and how I’m exactly like Kate or like Meghan.
Tan, to me it boils down to manners. I believe Wails was 36 years old. She was married for 7 years by then. I don’t think it’s unrealistic to assume she was more than able of saying something to the effect that she doesn’t loan makeup/gloss. If she said it with a smile, then fine. This is someone who didn’t want to loan the gloss and made sure the whole world knew it was a sacrifice for her and felt it was disgusting. She could have smiled and handed it to Meghan and told her to keep it because she more several more.
Let’s remember, we’re not dealing (supposedly) with just any ole 36-year-old. She had been royal family adjacent for how many years? Frankly, someone should have told her that she needed to learn manners post haste.
If she grimaced deliberately, which I believe is the real issue people are grappling with here, it most definitely was a micro aggression.
I see absolutely nothing wrong with what Meghan did – I wouldn’t think twice about handing my lip products to any friend or relative. But each to their own, of course. I think this was just another excuse to beat up Meghan.
I taught high school for a few years. Every single year there would be a severe outbreak of conjunctivitis among the 10th grade girls. Why? Because they shared makeup. Eye makeup sharing was the biggest contributor but we found it was happening with lipstick too. One year they were all wearing bright orange lipstick – huge outbreak. Another year, it was purple lipstick, bad outbreak again. No idea why it was always the 10th grade but it was. We would all emphasize that makeup should not be shared with them and they would ignore us until they all ended up unable to see because they couldn’t open their sore eyes.
I would either have said I didn’t have any, making sure not to use any from that point on, or just given her the tube.
Poor Meg tried to treat Kate like she treats her many girlfriends and hoped they will bond. Little did she know there was zero chance from the start. I don’t like sharing lip products, but there are million ways to handle this, including “please don’t be offended, it’s something I don’t do” but a Kate acted like a high school mean girl she is. I feel for Meg.
And to address all awkward W&K and H&M interactions – none of the described situations, including baby-brain memory or hugging, was that appalling and could have been dealt with easily without crossing anyone’s boundaries. But Wailses wanted to make a point each time to show Meg she is so gauche and unwelcome that it’s almost unimaginable that those people are supposed to be soft diplomatic force. I’ve learned more about behaving around different people by just working a corporate job at specialist level!
I believe that the only fault Meghan had in this (unfortunately) is her self assurance and how she got waaay too comfortable around Kate and Wills. She was really unaware of the protocols and formalities even around her in laws. I felt really bad for her- it’s like she can’t do anything right! Like, borrowing your SIL’s lip gloss?!?! Why is that a bad thing???
The problem (and hopefully Harry addresses this in the book) is that we don’t know what Harry told her about protocols in private or how to greet them or act while getting to know the Wailses. Maybe he just told Meghan “be yourself, they’ll love you!”
Because I can completely imagine (based on how friendly and open he was to her in public) that Harry welcomed Kate with open arms and probably was genial and entertaining and not standoffish when HE first met Kate. And I’ll bet he didn’t stand on protocol when it might have been the two of them alone with her curtsying to him and so on (I’m reminded of the time they were at some church service and he encourages her to go ahead of him – not protocol, just gender-based courtesy). And so, of course he would expect that to be reciprocated when he’s introducing his serious GF and future wife to those two bullies (I also notice Will is calling Harry Harold more than just in the assault story)!
So, for me, until we know how Harry framed these meetings, I just can’t fault Meghan too much. And especially when we know how Harry treated Kate when she joined the family, I really cannot side with her (Kate). She should have been, at minimum, as kind to Meghan as Harry was to her. But she’s a mean girl and has always been a mean girl.
Harry says in the other post about this (about the hugging) that he knew Meghan had to curtsy to his grandmother, obviously. But it never occurred to him that William expected her to curtsy to him.
I think there’s also the component of Meghan’s eagerness to join a family after years as an only child. She was excited to have these connections and maybe didn’t give them time to develop organically. This is something I’ve seen in communities I’ve been a part of – oftentimes, the people hoping for a familiar and familial connection are doing things that unintentionally push others away.
This is separate from Will and Kate’s personality defects.
This is probably the best explanation I have ever seen for the dynamic. William and Kate are both older siblings and as an older sibling myself I am far more independent and noticed even as a child that the only children I know would be very familiar from the get go as if trying to simulate what they believe a close sibling relationship is like. Coming into our kitchen and making themselves food, leaning on me etc This makes me feel a little sad for Meg. She met the younger brother, someone who himself is very familiar with people he’s met a couple times, hugs and kisses veteran family for example. I can get where she’d think here’s a big family for me to join (remember Harry’s comment about the family she never had?) lack of communication is the problem here too. Because while it’s an intimate thing to say, as soon as Harry was determined to marry her, he should’ve told William and Kate about Meghan’s desire to feel like big family. They might’ve still be annoyed but at least they would’ve got where she was coming from instead of constantly othering her as an American to the point where Meghan had to make self deprecating jokes about herself to them. She internalised the anti-American vibes they were giving off it sounds like.
Oh my god Catherine. Just give it to her. Buy yourself six new ones to replace it. You have literally an unlimited lip gloss budget. What the fuck is wrong with you.
This is where I come down, too. I’m a germaphobe but if my soon-to-be sister-in-law was about to appear with me in public and needed to borrow my lip gloss, I would have handed it over and told her to keep it.
Kate is as dumb as the stick up her ass but she saw Meghan as competition. And on that, least, she was right because in that appearance, Meghan revealed herself to be the star she is: poised, eloquent, forthright and interesting as hell.
For f*cks sake Waity Katie, if you didn’t want to catch Meghan’s cooties you could have just tossed the lip gloss afterwards. But you know that obsessed friendless weirdo Waity still has that gloss on her Meghan alter/vision board.
Meh. I would cringe if anyone wanted to borrow my lip gloss. I’m a bit germaphobic and YUCK. To me it would be like sharing a toothbrush or a used kleenix.
I don’t wear makeup anymore but I was always taught not to share (especially eye makeup). So my initial thought when I saw the headline was, as much as I LOVE Meghan and will defend her every minute of every day, this was a no for me.
…HOWEVER, when I read the story, she only squeezed the lip gloss onto her own finger and then applied it. So I have absolutely no problem with that and barely even consider that “sharing.” That is a COMPLETELY different thing, IMO, to someone applying it directly to their lips and one that even someone as squeamish as me (about germs) would have no problem with.
How would Kate know Meghan would put the lip gloss on her finger?
She wouldn’t, which is why if it bothered her the adult normal thing to do would be to politely decline sharing in the first place. Meg didn’t force her to share, she asked, and if it was an issue, Kate could have politely declined
Harry saw her do it and Kate was there too. They were all waiting to go on stage.
What I took from this story was Harry thinking that they’d all have a laugh about this, meaning he thought that his brother and SIL would be welcoming, kind and like normal people but instead W&K were offended by everything Meg did and were quick to judge her. For me this is one of the saddest parts of all of the last 5 years, Harry truly hoped that his brother and SIL, he and Meg would be besties, with the kids all growing up together. The realization that his beloved brother didn’t want that and probably never did want that and actively took steps to ensure that it would never be must have been such a punch in the gut for Harry.
That’s my take as well.
I can see how they felt she intruded on boundaries, but I can also see that the reason they felt that was because they instantly resented her presence. The fact that she had the audacity to treat them as equals made the resentment worse. The only thing she could have done right in their books was to cower at their magnificence.
Kate and William are very small, insecure people. William is an absolute dick and likely abuses his wife (at least verbally). I have no doubt that he constantly informs her that she is beneath him and never good enough. A natural rockstar like Meghan would be threatening in that situation. And the combined star power of H & M together would be untenable.
I suspect that William’s resentment of Meghan (and Harry) has been a godsend to Kate because it has given her something to bond with her abusive husband over. What a miserable existence she has chosen.
I’m also very curious if Harry gets into how W & K treated his other girlfriends. He seems obviously surprised at their standoffishness with Meghan (the ‘it never entered my mind to tell her to curtsey to them’), so I’m guessing they treated his (white!) girlfriends much differently. The more I read these stories, the more I realize it wasn’t Meghan’s “American”-isms or personality that put them off, they were determined to dislike her no matter what.
It’s hilarious that so many people suddenly don’t share lipgloss or whatever, So let me ask you: do you kiss others on the cheek or lips? How is that any different from squeezing a blob of vaseline on your finger? This is not a hard line unless you’re really disgusted by the other person. Moreover, Kate should have been gracious enough to tell Meghan she was not comfortable sharing or for her to keep the tube. Why are we making excuses for something as benign as this? Eeesh
I only kiss my spouse and children and don’t share lip stuff and tbh, I don’t think that’s weird. I realize this incident happened in The Before Times, but I would hope that after a global pandemic folks would be more circumspect about sharing personal care products. I was before and I SUPER am now.
@Lucy I used to hug my friends and give three kisses on the cheeks pre-covid and had a dozen or so lipglosses that losing one to a friend wouldn’t have been a big deal. Kate clearly had a hard boundary on sharing and that’s fine, what is not fine however is for her to make a stink face in an attempt to make Meghan feel less. All she had to say was she wasn’t comfortable sharing. We are all adults and should be able to have these conversations without trying to make the other feel like shit.
Also, I have and do disagree with many of their actions and have no problem with others having their own perspectives, still, this lipgloss issue taken in isolation would have been a nothingburger, however, when combined with all the other passive-aggressive stuff Kate’s done over the course of three years, I’m unwilling to give her a pass.
@Bibi, absolutely agree. If you weren’t masking it up pre-Covid, I don’t want to hear ANYTHING about how you don’t give hugs, don’t share lip gloss, don’t share food, etc.
If you can’t navigate the situation to say, “Here, keep it!” or “Golly, I’m not used to hugging others!” then just admit that. You’re lacking in the social etiquette department.
Yikes… Thank you for confirming what folks with anxiety disorders (or neurodivergence) fear other people think of us when we try to communicate boundaries.
seriously? People who didn’t wear a mask before COVID aren’t allowed to have any other boundaries? Who made you the judge of that, again?
“suddenly”? This is a community where people routinely confess to having very strict standards (multiple showers a day, washing everything under one wear – things that aren’t even available to much of the world), and where people talk about social anxiety a ton, too. There’s nothing “sudden” about this conversation, you’re just desperate to make it look “sudden” because, apparently, we are never allowed to disagree with Meghan no matter how gently and minorly.
@Lucy, I’ve had a long-term relationship with someone who has Asperger’s. Many people thought he was an asshole for the way he communicated. Because he sounded like it. And once he was diagnosed and realized that, he took extra steps to prevent others from feeling hurt or bothered by something he may have done or said. Why? Because he cared. He may not always be able to prevent something, but he cared enough to check-in.
Caring and being gracious aren’t things that become impossible for those suffering from anxiety disorders or who are not neurotypical. And as you’ll find from the other posts on this couple today, it’s pretty clear that they dug in hard to being a**holes. Align with that if you want.
@Lemons Ah – I see. It’s simply not caring enough or being gracious! I will work on that – you should too.
@Tessa – Thank you for understanding. It’s a bummer when folks worry about impacts to H&M’s mental health but not the people actually reading their words.
@Tessa exactly! Before Covid, I had these standards. I don’t share my personal items, even if it’s lipgloss. I don’t just give any ole body a hug and it’s ok to not like something that Meghan does. It’s ok to discuss it and give our 2 cents– that doesn’t mean we are haters or trolls.
Kate does kiss people on the cheek so in her case she was just being difficult.
Others may have different boundaries but we have publicly seen how Kate acts. She was othering Meghan.
In this case, I agree that it was handled poorly. But (as is happening elsewhere in this thread) making sweeping statements and judgements about *everyone* should have viewed the request and reacted accordingly is too far.
I get not wanting to share lip products. I won’t either. I know it was a squeeze tube and Meghan put some on her finger which is “better” than a doe foot applicator going on her finger even but still, I would be quite hesitant to share.
Oh please. I’m looking around at all the women here who use makeup testers at Sephora talking about not sharing lipgloss that is squeezed onto the hand, not the lips.
You didn’t like Harry once he married Meghan.
If you are squeamish about your viral load status, it’s best not to broadcast it to a message board full of strangers.
oh, wow… Yes, because women using testers at Sephora and not sharing lipgloss are absolutely always the same women.
So, shaming of other women is ok (not to mention that your shaming doesn’t even make sense: why would anyone hesitate to broadcast it to a board full of ANONYMOUS strangers? or any strangers, really?), but not sharing a lip gloss is nasty? Interesting logic.
Just say fine – I’m not either of the two women in this story so it doesn’t apply to me but I do fine sharing make up products gross. What’s going on here?
I’m surprised that so many people think Meghan was wrong. It was from a tube not something that would be put on her lips. If it was lipstick type Meghan probably wouldn’t have asked. I think Kate should have covered up her disgust better or explained she doesn’t share makeup. It didn’t need to become a thing.
i dont think this is a right or wrong situation. Meghan is comfortable asking to share these things, Kate is not. Plenty of women fall on either side of this boundary and either side is fine.
it’s only a thing because it was mentioned in Harry’s book, i dont think it was ever even leaked to the press and they leak everything.
i personally feel that Harry should have left this out. He had plenty of real ammunitions, this was not necessary and feels a little petty given that Kate did share, she just had a grimace doing it, which i guess im defending because i would have done the same if i had been put on a spot like that in public.
If the soft diplomat being paid to be an expert on etiquette and social interactions can’t refrain from grimacing when asked by a (future) female relative to use their lip gloss…baby, they’re not worth it.
This is totally a right or wrong thing. Making a face instead of simply saying she is not comfortable sharing shows she does not have adult etiquette skills. It was childish behaviour.
Let’s stop making excuses for someone who has shown time and again she despises Meghan. Have we forgotten her multiple instances of publicly intimidating Meghan on camera?
As many pointed out above: how could Kate have known that Meghan would put it on her finger?
I’m sure everyone here is a super smooth operator 100% of the time, especially when about to go on stage for a televised event in front of a crowd, sure.
Yes I agree for both Meghan and Kate. Both didn’t know as they were both nervous for different reasons
Who RAISED this woman? Ick or no ick, your future SIL asks to borrow something, you hand it to them, no questions asked and say ‘keep it! Its my pleasure to be able to give you what you need just in time!’. Or something to that affect. To me it speaks to a lack of class and education and grace to be petty about something so small and insignificant. My wonderful dead mother just rose from her grave to eye roll this encounter and shout BE BETTER! All the titles in the world won’t buy you elegance and class…
Some years ago I was in a social situation where a woman asked the group if anyone had lip gloss, and I went into people pleasing mode and let her use mine. Immediately after doing so, I realized my germophobia would stop me from ever using it again (it was an expensive one, too, more fool me).
Unless Meghan had just washed her hands, her fingers probably had as much if not more bacteria on them than her lips.
Sorry, H & M, I can’t be on your side for this one.
I am oddly getting very triggered by comments like this but I have to ask – Was your “people pleasing mode” or “germaphobia” the other woman’s fault? It’s not impolite to ask, as long as one can accept a decline gracefully, so I’m not a big fan of judging someone for simply asking a favor
This. Decline gracefully, or at least, honestly. Kate could’ve even said, No, sharing makeup freaks me out!
No, of course my own hang-ups aren’t someone else’s fault. But I had a visceral reaction to just the headline about sharing lipgloss, maybe exacerbated by having that experience once and being frustrated with myself. Reading the comments, it’s clear that some other people also felt, “oh, no, no, no, no, no,” about sharing cosmetics.
Someone’s people pleasing mode is only their responsibility to navigate, but asking someone directly for something can make it very hard for people pleasers to say no.
It’s a very common High Context vs Low Context culture/personality issue.
But you didn’t make a grimace after passively aggressively lending the lip gloss. Everyone is trying to apply this to themselves but so much more happened here than being worried about germs.
aww let’s give kate a break. maybe it was just those pesky baby brain hormones meghan pointed out.
Which hasn’t been discussed here, but was completely out of line. You don’t comment on that at all
Hard disagree on the baby brain comment being out of line.
Kate spent over £170 000 on clothes last year alone. I think she can afford £8 for a replacement lip gloss, which could have been fetched for her while she was at the talk.
I like Meghan as a person, but yeah, no. Every makeup artist knows that it’s 101-level stuff that you never, ever share products that make contact with the mouth unless the applicator/dispensing surface is sterile – meaning, they are wiping it down with alcohol first. And the fact that it was a tube doesn’t excuse it – her finger still had to make contact with the dispensing surface. And if Kate was pregnant, I kind of get it? Pregnant women are considered to be in an immuno-compromised state.
But that begs the question – why did she just not politely decline? Is it so difficult to say “I’d rather not.” I guess we can assume from this that Kate isn’t carrying any sanitizing wipes in that little clutch?
Omg kate should have told her to keep the damn lip gloss. Her being pregnant is not why she made a grimace. She’s just rude.
I don’t share lipgloss with anyone, even my closest friends, because I’m a germaphobe. That said, the way Meghan used it would not have bothered me at all and 2) had she (or anyone else) used it directly on their lips and I had Kate Middleton money I would have just been like cool, I’ll buy another this afternoon.
Another one here to say “no” for lip gloss sharing. My own child asks to use my chapstick and I cringe. (She’s also 4 and a mini germ factory; I don’t like to share food or drinks with her either at these stages.) Anyway, the chapstick the kids uses is now exclusively hers, haaaa. As someone said above, some people just have their “ick.” Yes, Megan didn’t make contact with her own lips, but putting a finger on where my lips would go still makes me say ick.
Kate certainly has the money to replace a single lip gloss if she truly didn’t want to share with Meghan. She could have told Meghan to keep the whole tube (You might need it!) or shrugged and tossed the thing later on. Given that we’ve seen her physically recoil from touching Black people, I can draw my own conclusions as to why Kate felt so uncomfortable, and it wasn’t just her jealousy.
I also don’t share cosmetics, but guess what? I would’ve just politely said no and let her know I’m not comfortable with it. I don’t think Meghan was wrong for asking as plenty of people are happy to share. If Kate was uncomfortable, she should’ve communicated that boundary. Let’s act like freakin adults and use our words. Jesus.
Sorry Harry, but nope. I don’t share lip products either. I would have been like keep it. And I still wouldn’t have been okay with her finger.
It’s not even such a big deal. Sure I don’t like sharing my things, but taken by the finger was such a common thing we do all the time. And if she was so grossed out by the half black American taking her gloss, she could have just been the bigger person and let her keep it. Surely the money she spends on those ugly dresses and identical coats would have been enough to afford a teensy new gloss.
I don’t share products like that but I would also understand why it might be necessary in a public situation. It comes down to whether or not you want the other person to succeed. In this case, I would have used my product one last time and then handed it over and never used it again. Under no circumstances would I let the person in a bind know that I was uncomfortable with it. Because that is rude.
I think Meghan wanted her and Kate to have a sisterly relationship but Kate saw Meghan as being beneath her.
Yeah, I’m kinda impressed that Harry picked up on these small nuances. some guys would be like like really, that happened? I didn’t see it…she let you use the lip gloss so what’s the big deal.?
Kate doesn’t have friends and so wouldn’t have been asked this much. She also thinks she’s above everyone so this request from Megan would seem something that the only ‘regular people’ would do. Some people don’t like sharing and all Kate had to communicate, it’s not a big deal.
Take a tissue. Wipe the top and share. No biggie. But it was to Kate, who just didn’t want to share her lip gloss with her black soon to be SIL. Ain’t got a thing to do with her being a germaphobe. It’s because Meghan was black. She didn’t want her black germs on her lip gloss.
Hahahaha…all I can think of is “I just can’t spare a square” from Seinfeld 🙂
I agree with this showing that Kate’s apparently never had a girlfriend in her life. It’s fine to feel icky about it for personal reasons like hygiene or whatever, but then as others have said, just chirp “Sure, keep it, you look great in it” and buy yourself another one. No need to be confrontational about it, it’s just freaking lipgloss…has she never given a tampon from her purse in an emergency to another woman in a restaurant bathroom or office? Kare sounds extremely high maintenance….
I’m someone who doesn’t share drinks, doesn’t share makeup, etc. I never have. But I feel like her swiping it on her finger is fine, and in this kind of situation, of course I would share, even if it meant I let her keep it after. Wipe it with an alcohol wipe after if you’re pressed, Kate. Or just…buy a new one.
Years ago, my roommate and I were shopping and I forgot my lipbalm at home and asked to borrow hers. If she had said no, I would have just purchased another one. Instead what she said was that she preferred that I put it on my lips directly because it would have fewer germs than my fingers that touched the door, the shopping cart handle, etc. This makes sense to me but as I’ve tried to direct other people (that I know) to just put it on their (or my) lips over the years I find that most are uncomfortable so the compromise is to just put it on a tissue. Or squeeze above the finger without any contact to the skin.
Regarding this specifically, I’m not going to ding Kate on not being comfortable or prepared to share, that not for everyone. I also, think that if that was a boundary for her then it’s sad that she didn’t know how/chose not to articulate it but instead grimaced because I think Meghan would have understood and respected a “no”.
I think Harry is sharing this story as another illustration of how he thought they would be one big happy family and these little moments started showing him otherwise. I will reserve final judgement until I read this within the context of the book.
Was this lip gloss made from some rare material that no longer exists? Lol. Even us plebs would have more than 1 lip gloss. The amount of lipsticks I lost in my lifetime are endless. Catherine could give it to meghan or have one of the assistants to look or buy for one nearby for meghan at that time. Don’t they travel with an entourage that could be asked to do things for them? Honestly reading these anecdotes makes them look like a middle class family instead of bilionnaires. Like Camilla converting Harrys room, sounds so common.
I’m sorry this is ridiculous. In my world it’s completely normal for women to share cosmetic products in a pinch, and if someone is uncomfortable doing so it’s also completely normal to say “sorry but no” . People are acting like she stole the lip gloss out of Kate’s purse and forced her to watch as she made love to it, for crying out loud. She asked a favor, the favor was given, and then she politely used the gloss in a way to minimize the transfer of germs. Kate is a grown ass adult woman, she could have simply declined if it was uncomfortable for her. The offense taken here is completely insane
Editing to add: my 7 year old mastered the response of sorry but no when he was 5…I’m sure Kate with all her “maturity” can figure it out
It’s like Kate has never had female friends. Most of us share makeup especially if we have to go out and face people. No one applies it directly to their faces either!
I can imagine that Kate whipped out her lip gloss to freshen up, and when Meghan saw that it was in a tube, she asked to borrow some. Harry, being a guy, may have missed this part. Women don’t usually ask to borrow other women’s lipstick tubes or lip gloss wands, at least not in my experience.
Kate didn’t even want to hug Meghan so there’s no way she would be ok with sharing lip gloss.
Kate clearly did not care for her and Meghan trying to immediately treat her like a friend wasn’t going to work. It’s unfortunate that these minor and petty personality clashes turned into a physical confrontation between William and Harry.
The audacity of this bitch. She is willing to share William with other woman. But she cant give her sil a lipgloss?? That too she can buy a million more like that.
I put the blame on William and his anger issues. It is certainly not Meghan and Kate’s fault for William’s bad behavior. “Minor” clashes can quickly escalate. The worst was Kate letting the fake crying story stay in the press and not deny it.
I think sharing lip gloss is gross. Also, just wondering, do Meghan and Kate do their own make-up when doing public appearances? I assumed they would have hair and make-up people with them? No? Sorry I know very little about Royal life. But still, I’m not going to judge someone for not wanting to share their lip gloss. It’s a personal choice. I mean in this case, she let her use it. The real question is what happened to that lip gloss afterwards? Did Kate throw it away? Why do I have a feeling she did. Now that is sad.
Royal ladies usually have makeup artists, Diana did, but Kate always insisted on doing her own makeup even for her wedding. Professionals do her hair though.
Ah ok thanks. So I’m wondering where Meghan’s make-up artist was during this? Don’t they usually do touch-ups before the cameras start rolling? Does Meghan also do her own make-up?
I wouldn’t focus on the fact that Kate didn’t want to share her lip gloss, but the grimacing part. That video at the post-funeral walkabout shows how pointed and scary Kate’s facial expressions can be.
I’ve been thinking about this a little more, and what’s interesting is that all of the stories have in common Kate‘s unwillingness to act like she has a body. The amount of control Kate forces over her body is of a piece with all of the stories. It reminds me of EM Forester’s novel A Room with a View, when two elderly Edwardians are scandalized someone said the word “stomach.”
Of course, the only role Kate has in life is to be a broodmare, so it makes sense that she would be incredibly sensitive over her body…. Still, it doesn’t paint a very nice picture.
I don’t get it. These people are supposed to be skilled diplomats who are able to put people at ease. Okay you’re uncomfortable about it, that’s fair enough. You’re all adults, just say it. Aren’t these the same people who claim Kate lent Meghan a face oil? Lent btw not gifted! But if Harry caught your grimace then Meghan might’ve too. Surely there was a diplomatic, self deprecating, banter-y way to decline? Or Kate could’ve made a funny show of wiping it down herself? Like I KNOW they know how to do this, they just didn’t want to and didn’t care about their reaction being seen. They keep saying they rolled out the red carpet for Meg. It seems more like they lumberingly tacked it down while grumbling at every step loud enough for Meghan to hear. How isolating it must have been. Meghan trying to broker girl power and relatability at every step and just being knocked back. Like damn, declining would’ve been more polite than making the face.
I hate it when dumb things get criticized because it takes away from the big things. No one has to share their lip gloss or hug anyone they don’t want to. Kate’s screwed up in a lot of ways, but that doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have a right to personal space. Honestly, Meghan needs to stop hugging people unless she knows they are comfortable with it. I don’t like hugging people because I’m sensitive to scents. It’s not worth the literal headache.
Maybe this is being brought up because Harry knows that Kate is a hugger and sharer, but was completely different to Meghan. Maybe, Kate was always hugging him and saying that she is a hugger.
This is definitely a cultural thing. I’m British, middle class, would never ask even a very close friend to borrow a lip gloss. Just wouldn’t. And especially not in these circles.
Agree. I don’t share my makeup, primarily for my sake. At first I thought it was a tube and applicator, which is way out of order. But is a tube dispenser. I can imagine I would think “no” if asked, as a Brit knee jerk, and then think better of it because it isn’t a brush. I don’t know. These things cause you to over think your reactions.
I don’t share either. But when a close friend or family asks? Fuck yeah! Whatever I have is yours!
That is not an American thing and a hard no for me. Its about hygiene and pretty ballsy of Meg to ask the future Queen for her lip gloss.
While I am no Kate fan, I have to give her this one. I got lice in high school by sharing a brush with my sister. That experience was pretty traumatic and the anxiety dragged on for months (I had to go through the treatment twice) with my mom checking my hair every other night and pulling out every single strand with nits on it. I do not share my brushes or combs with anyone anymore, not even my sister. I refuse to wear hats belonging to other people. If someone wants to borrow a hair elastic, no problem but they are keeping it afterwards. I’d be the same way with lip/makeup products, even if you were asking to put it on your finger. Everyone is different obviously and Kate could have just politely declined, but I could see maybe she didn’t want to seem rude with Meghan being so new. But Kate can afford to get new lip gloss and her grimace was over the top. All she had to do was throw it out and get a new one or ask Meghan to keep it.
What’s weird about this is they both would have had make up artists (I’ve seen the one who travels with Kate in the car, at least) so I suspect this might have been even less weird than it’s being presented.
Kate easily could get a back up new one from her MUA. Why didn’t Meghan’s have one? Maybe they were in the audience ready to step on stage. Idk it’s weird and maybe a bit much from Meghan.
Yeah she overstepped here, but nowhere near worth deserving the hatred she got from them. At the very most this is her being clueless and taking the culture on set to her new situation, I mean, get over it Kathy.
Girl, no. They didn’t travel with their makeup artists. Harry makes it pretty clear they were told they didn’t have any money to support H&M; it’s unlikely M had a makeup artist with her all the time. Asking your sister in law if you can borrow lip gloss is “a bit much”? No. That’s ludicrous.
I guess I’m the germ spreading person. I’ve handed my lip gloss to friends when they asked, and without them asking if I think their lips need moisturizing. Friends have done the same for me, handing me lip gloss when I asked and when I didn’t asked.
Also, I’m the crazy person on the plane that would offer a stranger some chap stick if I see their lip is dry. I’ve had people accept and refuse my offer with a thank you. NO side eye was necessary, but a friendly banter takes place.
Judging from the posts here, the fear of germs by my fellow human being is off the chart. No wonder people are so stressed.
I wonder how many of these germ people still wear masks in public indoor spaces.
We know Kate and William barely did.
yeah I don’t care who these people are or which team I’m on, this is objectively gross. Sorry Meg.
Being ok with sharing make up or not is not the issue here. You don’t make disgusted face at anyone, yet alone your future SIL. Kate could buy herself a milion new lip glosses and throw this one out. She must have really wanted to make this expression, it can’t be easy with all this Botox.
Thanks because so many are missing the issue. It’s not about sharing the lip gloss but passively aggressively lending and then making a face about it.
I guess learning how to politely decline things wasn’t covered in Kate’s early years studies.
I don’t blame her at all! It’s a nasty request-especially with Covid killing people every day!
COVID wasn’t going around in 2018.
Kate and William haven’t worn a mask in years and did a tour during restrictions in Scotland.
Is this the same K8 being a germaphobic but barely wearing a mask during a pandemic?
For me, there are two takeaways from this anecdote:
1 Kate, married to William for seven years, was the future Queen to his King and was expected to exercise diplomacy with all subjects of fifteen Commonwealth realms. Yet Kate was incapable of acting graciously in the simplest of social situations.
2 Kate’s pattern of interaction with POC demonstrates that she is racist.
Sharing lip gloss is gross. Sharing any makeup is gross.
The mental gymnastics going on everytime there a story about kate showing her true colors . All suddenly there a new crops of comments defending Kate side with her if she didn’t want to share her lipgloss with Meghan all she had to do was say no people are acting like Meghan went into this woman purse and stole her lipglosses all suddenly everyone is germ phobia and can understand Kate attitude. Kate was determined for the very beginning to undetermined treated Meghan as less than . Kate has no problem hugging white strangers kissing white peoples I’m sure she has no problem sharing her lipgloss with other white woman . Kate is a racist who didn’t want to share her lipgloss with Meghan because Meghan is black . There is always this need for some people to project their own issues into Kate to give her excuses for her horrible racist behavior.
Kate is no ‘lady’ and doesn’t know how to be ‘gracious’. She’s a liability. But I wouldn’t share lip gloss. What about Kate’s germs infecting Meghan? Kate used that lipgloss far more so that’s far more likely.
I wouldn’t share lipgloss with my own sisters. That’s really gross. I don’t blame Kate. Plus, what if she has herpes on the mouth? It’s really contagious. Not safe, and that’s not an “American” thing.
Oh for the love of… if Meghan was having a herpes outbreak (not that I think even remotely that she has it) she wouldn’t have done the television appearance. Some of you here are really reaching…
Kate stans coming in for their sad sad kill
Ffs I meant Meghan could catch it from KkKate. Ffs
Who says “herpes of the mouth”
Maybe you’ve cracked it, Kate didn’t want to give Meghan herpes. It all makes sense now.
WTH? I don’t share any beauty items with anybody, ever. Not even chapstick with my own daughter.
Putting lip gloss on your finger is still contact.
I admit to being a germaphobe. I will not. I’ve handed my tube of hand lotion to another person, they used it, gave it back. Later when alone I will throw it out.
The very idea of using my SO toothbrush makes me ill. I know some have zero problem with this, I will.not.ever.
From me? Kate gets a pass on this.
I guess we’ll have to wait until we can read the whole book, because maybe in the broader context some of these small items being included will make sense, but I really think he should have avoided score settling on some of these super small thing, it just comes off as petty. I’m surprised he would have even noticed or cared if Kate made a face about lip gloss.
I think people are failing to realize that they were all about to take the stage at a TELEVISED event so Meg basically made an emergency request for lip gloss. I’m a germaphobe but I would not hesitate to share with another woman who was about to go on television. As many have said, Kate could have simply gifted the lip gloss to Meghan or thrown it away after the event. (I also don’t believe that Kate cares that much about germs given her poor adherence to Covid protocols.)
Let’s remember that this was immediately before the first public event of its kind, where Megan‘s appearance was going to be under the microscope. In moments like these either you’re a team player or it is every person for themselves. I think we know how it went.
I’m weird like this. I can’t stand drinking after someone or sharing lipsticks etc. it’s not even about germs. It’s just a weird visceral thing I have. You drink out of my drink? It’s yours now!
Elsa = 150% Agree!
I’m with you both, Elsa and HeyKay. If my partner drinks from my drink, it’s his from thereon. He also eats the leftovers from everyone’s plates, because he hates waste. It’s horrible to see.
I understand if Kate was squicked out by it, but the way she handled it was not classy. Just say, “Meg, I’m a total germaphobe, I’m going to have to say no,” or give it to her and let her keep it would have been better responses. I also don’t get the comments that are “that’s disgusting, how dare she even ask the future queen.”
I agree with the commenters that she obviously never had any girlfriends or a job where she had to act like a normal person (Kate). It’s a bonding thing and I wouldn’t hesitate to share lip gloss with a close relative (blood-related or not) or a good friend or a close coworker. If some rando asked me for lip gloss, no, but again, if she’d ever had normal interactions with other women, she could have just said politely no (learning how to be nice when saying no is a life skill). But instead she’s a drama queen about it. Meg tried to treat these people like family and it’s clear they didn’t want that. Do they all seriously treat each other so formally behind closed doors? Apparently. Diana was right (they’re crazy).
I’ve never heard “squicked out” before. I love the sound of it. Does it mean grossed out? Is it American?
Yes it is a similar meaning as “grossed out”.
I have heard it here in canada so I think it’s at least North American.
Yes, American! 🙂
I don’t know, this is not a direct quote from the book. This is through Page Six’s Murky Murdoch filter. So I would wait to read the exact passage for context.
I think people have the right to feel uncomfortable about things. I think I would have left this example out of the book.
I don’t share my makeup with anyone, I think it is icky. Just take another look at the picture at the top of the screen. MM has lipgloss on PoW does not. So I surmise PoW gave MM the lipgloss to wear. MM returned said tube, now PoW, if she does not have a back up lipgloss ,would rather go without than reapply. It’s exactly what I would do. Although I probably would have said “sorry no” Then we could all enjoy lipglossgate and complain PoW does not share. Basically it’s a no win situation.
I’m usually jot someone who shares lip gloss. I actually but different scents for my household to place in our stockings to avoid any mixup as far as use. Even being someone who normally doesn’t share lip gloss, I am willing to share with someone who is in a pinch. I either tell them to keep it or take it back and throw it away later to be gracious and understanding of their need. I have myself experienced times of having to desperately ask for lip gloss when I have forgotten my own. I always use my finger by dropping it on my finger without having to touch the tube or wipe it with tissue or a handkerchief. Being unkind is unnecessary and uncalled for. Regardless to all of that, nothing Meghan has done justifies the treatment she has received.
I’m a self-described germaphobe. This wouldn’t fly with me even BEFORE Covid (there’s a more than small part of me that felt relief at the extra hygienic measures everyone picked up during the height of mask-wearing, etc). I think it’s been pretty clear that I am NOT in any way in favor of Kate but for this particular thing, I cannot fault her for being uneasy about the ask. BUT — my guess is that Meghan, being a good-natured people person, innocently asked K for this favor the same way she would with any female friend or even acquaintance of hers. All Kate had to do was squash the bitch face, offer to squeeze it herself on her finger or offer to let her keep the damn thing as others suggested, and keep it moving. Why go out of your way to make Meghan feel bad about something that at the end of the day, is no big deal and really just a gesture to build some kind of rapport with her soon-to-be-SIL? Just to pull the bitch card she loves to wield and keep a wall up between the two of them? Maybe M was being too forward/familiar, but I’d personally prefer that any day over stick-up-her-ass K.
I’m kinda OCD about cosmetics, so I would have a problem with this. But, hey, all you do is lend it out let the person keep it…then buy a new one. Sheesh.
If I were Meghan I’d be getting a Herpes test done. God only knows where that Mumblers lips have been…Ewwwwwe 🤮
Much as I love Meghan and Harry, this is a complete non story, I personally don’t share lipgloss or lipstick with anyone sorry
I read once that manners and etiquette are used by people without class, to make people feel like outsiders. But the real purpose is to relieve social pressure and make people feel welcome. I don’t share lipgloss. But I have had people ask to borrow mine. I just hand them the tube, let them use it, put it back in my bag and throw it away later. It is lip gloss not a diamond tiara. Why make someone uncomfortable when they weren’t trying to offend?
She’s known as KKKhate for a reason.
It probably was Meghan realizing she forgot her gloss, they were about to go on so just asked for a squeeze of Kate’s since it was probably there. She put it on her finger, not like she kissed it off her. Between this and the baby brain comment, I think Meghan was just trying to have girlfriend moments with Kate and Kate wasn’t having any of it. A fair criticism I’ve heard from some Squaddies is that either Meghan failed to read the room when it came to Kate and Will, or thought these little things wouldn’t matter. These thing’s really aren’t that big a deal and throw away gestures/comments for normal people, but cringey reading it, but there must be a reason this stuff was included.
Kate is so cute on these photos. So roundy and chubby cheeks. Cute! She should have kept that weight.
I share makeup with my sister and mom and even close friends but it’s not unusual for someone to not want to share. I just wish Kate had said you can have it instead of making a face.
It’s hard to take Kate seriously here when her kink was to flash her royal cooter while boarding planes. I grimaced for years! You’d think she’d be more sympathetic to the newest member of the family learning to adjust as she did. Faux pas and all, it’s a learning curve.
Anyone who aspires to be Queen of the fifteen realms of the Commonwealth must be comfortable sharing her lipgloss with her sister-in-law.
Like many others, I’m a bit squicked out by the request. But in a post-covid world, the request rings differently than it would have back then. And seeing as Meghan would have been used to getting her makeup done for years, I totally understand having far looser boundaries with makeup than the average person. The fact that Kate couldn’t bring herself to be a decent person and treat the request with kindness and grace says a whole lot more about her than Meghan.
Right. I can understand not wanting to share something that goes on my mouth, you know? But if my sister-in-law (I have three of them) asked to borrow some lip gloss, I certainly wouldn’t make a face or be put out in any way.
There’s nothing wrong with having an issue with this, but on the other had there’s nothing wrong with asking either. Meghan made an innocuous request and Kate made a stink face. It just seems to have been part of a pattern of Kate being tetchy, stiff, and unfriendly from the start.
This response reminds me of Friends – that thing about Joey doesn’t share food. The only exception here is that Khate doesn’t share anything, not even kindness or grace.
This particular story made me think of when Fergie accused Diana of giving her foot fungus after borrowing a pair of shoes.
I can’t believe everyone is backing Meghan up… you don’t know the person well, it’s her prerogative if she doesn’t like sharing LIP GLOSS… if it were a squirt of perfume and she cringed that would be one thing… but to share lip gloss – even putting on your finger, is very personal… and by that point the Wales knew how inappropriate and shady Meghan was, she didn’t like the thought of sharing it… again – her prerogative
You talk about them as being sisters in law as if they are equals. They may well be sisters in law however they are not equals. There is protocols to live by in the royal family. Catherine would have to curtsy to her step mother in law as she is the Queen consort as such she commands respect. Likewise Megan would be expected to show respect for the rank that Catherine has as future queen of England. Megan’s request to borrow something personal showed at best a lack of protocol knowledge and at worst a lack of respect for Royalty.
What the incident did show was the grace that Catherine has in not to correct her sister in law but instead moving on.