‘Spare’: Princess Diana’s sisters offered to let Meghan wear the Spencer Tiara

Of all the misunderstandings and picayune disagreements in recent Windsor history, I think the dumbest one is definitely the bridesmaids’ dress fiasco, which has now crept into its fifth year of extended melodrama, almost all of it from the Princess of Wales and her people. A close second in the Dumb Royal Melodrama: the wedding tiara fiasco. It’s been clear for a while that the whole thing was solely started by Angela Kelly, who was QEII’s dresser and BFF. Apparently, Kelly frequently leaked sh-t about other members of the family, and Kelly decided to leak a nasty version of the tiara story, which was basically that Meghan “demanded” a wedding tiara and then Harry pitched a fit about having access to the tiara ahead of the wedding. Kelly told people that Harry bitched her out and then QEII bitched him out. Not so, Harry says in Spare. But he adds a different layer to the entire tiara process: apparently, the Diana’s sisters had already offered Meghan the “Spencer Tiara,” the beautiful diamond headpiece worn by Diana on her wedding day, the tiara which belongs to the Earl Spencer and the Spencer family. Meghan was set to wear the Spencer Tiara when QEII suddenly offered Meghan a piece.

There had been spirited arguments in the back corridors of the Palace about whether or not Meg could—or should—wear a veil. Not possible, some said. For a divorcée, a veil was thought to be out of the question. But the powers that be, unexpectedly, showed some flexibility on the subject.

Next came the question of a tiara. My aunts asked if Meg would like to wear my mother’s. We were both touched. Meg then spent hours and hours with her dress designer, getting the veil to match the tiara, giving it a similar scalloped edge. Shortly before the wedding, however, Granny reached out. She offered us access to her collection of tiaras. She even invited us to Buckingham Palace to try them on. Do come over, I remember her saying.

Extraordinary morning. We walked into Granny’s private dressing room, right next to her bedroom, a space I’d never been in. Along with Granny was a jewelry expert, an eminent historian who knew the lineage of each stone in the royal collection. Also present was Granny’s dresser and confidante, Angela. Five tiaras were arrayed on a table, and Granny directed Meg to try on each one before a full-length mirror. I stood behind, watching.

One was all emeralds. One was aquamarines. Each was more dazzlingly stunning than the last. Each took my breath. I wasn’t the only one. Granny said to Meg quite tenderly: Tiaras suit you.

Meg melted. Thank you, Ma’am.

One of the five, however, stood out. Everyone agreed. It was beautiful, seemingly made for Meg. Granny said it would be placed in a safe directly and she looked forward to seeing it on Meg’s head come the Big Day. Make sure, she added, that you practice putting it on. With your hairdresser. It’s tricky and you don’t want to be doing it for the first time on the wedding day.

[From Spare by Prince Harry]

This is such big breaking news, I actually can’t believe that the British papers have mostly ignored it: Meghan was set to wear the beautiful Spencer Tiara and Meghan had even gotten her veil designed specifically with the Spencer Tiara in mind. I wonder how late in the process QEII offered Meghan a tiara – it sounds like it was maybe a month before the wedding, maybe even less time than that. Harry goes on to write that they requested the tiara from Angela one week later, after researching the importance of placing the tiara and sewing the veil and tiara and fixing it with the hair. Of course Angela Kelly “didn’t respond to any of our messages. We kept trying. No response.” Then, after a while, they finally reached her:

She said the tiara would require an orderly and a police escort to leave the Palace. That sounded…a bit much. But all right, I said, if that’s protocol, let’s find an orderly and a police officer and get the ball rolling. Time was running out. Inexplicably, she replied: Can’t be done.

Why can’t it? Her schedule was too busy.

She was being obstructive, obviously, but for what reason? We couldn’t even hazard a guess. I considered going to Granny, but that would probably mean sparking an all-out confrontation, and I wasn’t quite sure with whom Granny would side. Also, to my mind, Angela was a troublemaker, and I didn’t need her as an enemy.

[From Spare by Prince Harry]

This went on for a while, with Angela Kelly blanking Harry’s requests, and Meghan’s hairdresser coming to London and then leaving. When Kelly finally arrived at KP “out of thin air,” Harry met her and signed the release she gave him. Harry writes: “I thanked her, though I added that it would’ve made our lives so much easier to have had it sooner. Her eyes were fire. She started having a go at me. Angela, you really want to do this now? Really? Now?”

I mean… there’s a reason why Charles and Camilla kicked Kelly out and changed all the locks the second after QEII died. Angela Kelly is a f–king menace and she used her position as QEII’s “favorite” to libel a blood prince and his bride.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

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231 Responses to “‘Spare’: Princess Diana’s sisters offered to let Meghan wear the Spencer Tiara”

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  1. Becks1 says:

    So what I find most shocking about this story is that H&M did not assume they would be offered a tiara from the Queen. Even at that point in the wedding planning, they had other plans for a tiara because it wasn’t clear they would be offered one from the queen. It was far enough in the planning that her veil was designed etc.

    I know once the queen offered one H&M wouldn’t turn her down, but I still would have loved to have seen the heads explode as Meghan rolled up in the Spencer tiara.

    • Karol says:

      Once the Queen offered they would have had to take it for sure. If they said no I can already imagine the stories that would have come out. Smh

    • Mooney says:

      Keen who was sulking that day in her bridal white would have been spitting nails on camera 😂😂

      • Alice says:

        LOL so sorry we couldn’t see her face seeing Meghan in The Spencer she was never offered! And Camilla’s! Darn. I wish the Queen had forgotten or something.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      I’m gobsmacked! Because in other royal houses, where the brides haven’t been aristos with their own family tiaras, new brides were either loaned and given a tiara at their weddings regardless of their groom’s place in the line of succession.

      It seems that the Powers that Be in the royal households really were set on treating Meghan differently even on her wedding day. It bet they learned that she was set to wear the Spencer Tiara and the connotation to Diana was something that they wanted to avoid so they told the Queen that she should lend Meghan a tiara like she did for Kate.

      It was very sweet of Harry’s aunts to offer the Spencer to Meghan. I wouldn’t be surprised if they asked her what she which royal tiara she was wearing and when they learned she wasn’t offered one they stepped in.

      • Becks1 says:

        @ArtHistorian that’s what it sounds like happened, right? H&M were talking with the Spencer aunts, they ask which tiara she is wearing (or even if she has picked one yet) and she and Harry say she hasn’t been offered one so the aunts stepped up.

        I also agree with the person (sorry on my phone so scrolling is annoying lol) who said that it sounds like the Queen heard about the offer of the Spencer tiara and that’s when she offered one of hers so the Diana comparisons didn’t take hold.

      • The Hench says:

        @arthistorian – I can confirm this from my own personal experience. Mr Hench comes from an aristocratic family. I most certainly do not. Before our wedding my future father in law asked if I had a “family tiara” that I was going to wear. “Lol, no” I effectively replied so I was immediately offered their family tiara – hundreds of years old and uninsurable due to both its historical and monetary value. Before the wedding it was carefully delivered and placed in a safe for me to try. With the family gathered round, I turned up to try on this priceless artefact and it was handed to me very carefully. Reader, I promptly dropped it – SMACK – onto a hard floor. The family gasped and I scrabbled to retrieve it, discovering, as I picked it up that I’d bent one of the delicate tines. I quickly bent it back. I don’t think they noticed …😕

      • RoyalBlue says:

        @Hench! haha disaster averted,

      • susan says:

        exactly this. I think the Palace got wind that Meghan was set to wear the Spencer and realized how that would look-both a big plus for Meghan and dreadful for the palace-if she did. Granny sitting on that big pile of jewels and all that.

        But that said, I think the one she wore suited her style-and her dress-better.

      • Mumzy says:

        @The Hench—I gasped aloud! Kudos for not fainting. Well done!

    • OriginalLeigh says:

      I really wish she had worn the Spencer tiara, for sentimental reasons, but I guess turning the Queen down wasn’t an option.

      • Chloe says:

        I am actually of a different opinion. Although the royal household is definitely shady, and the whole tiara thing came back to bite her, i am happy she didn’t wear the spencer tiara but one that not many had worn in a long time. The queen mary bandeau tiara is now officially known as Meghan’s wedding tiara.

      • Becks1 says:

        @Chloe i love the Spencer tiara and like I said above would have loved for to have worn it for the reactions alone, but I think the bandeau actually suited Meghan a lot better and looked gorgeous on her.

      • Jais says:

        Agree. The bandeau tiara suited Meghan so well. It was delicate and subtle with that little flower in the middle, her moms nickname for her. It’s just the fact that they literally offered her tiaras at the last minute to keep her from wearing Diana’s. What assholes. Seriously.

      • Nanny to the Rescue says:

        I would think the Spencer tiara is bad mojo because of how that marriage went.

        And the tiara Meghan wore is actually much prettier IMO, and looks great on Meghan.

        I don’t envy Harry and Meghan the situation where they had to explain to the Spencers they won’t be using their tiara, tho. That’s always an awkward discussion.

      • Sam says:

        Omg I’m sure k had the worst tantrum of her life! How could they offer Meg Diana’s tiara but not her! I can say with almost 100 percent certainty, if k got the tiara she would have worn it at her wedding!

      • MissMarirose says:

        The tiara supposedly is bad luck due to all the divorces that occurred by brides who wore it.

      • Feeshalori says:

        Harry says in the book that they were shown an emerald tiara and an aquamarine tiara. So which emerald tiara was that, the one that Eugenie wore at her wedding? The one that Meghan supposedly threw a fit over because she couldn’t wear it even though it was included among the choices? It definitely sounds like the bandeau hands-down was the overall favorite one. And I’d also love to know which aquamarine tiara Harry was referring to.

      • Sugarhere says:

        The Queen mary bandeau tiara, the Spencer tiara, who cares. My attention is caught by the fact that Queen Elizabeth used her authority to preclude Meghan from wearing Diana’s head piece: the Queen despised and resented Diana so much that she didn’t want any such direct reminder of her and feared that the public’s affection for the Queen of Hearts would be projected onto Meghan, at the expense of the then future future queen consort.

        Queen Elizabeth was not the little old lady she appeared to be in her later years. She never stopped for a minute being a wily strategist: under the guise of granny affection, Elizabeth 2’s sudden proposal to drop the Spencer tiara was unmistakably designed to hamper the transfer of public love from Diana onto Meghan, and prevent the Diana myth from being resurrected. Well done, scheming witch.

        I can’t blame that H &M for feeling compelled to oblige the Queen, and even mistaking that last minute plan shift for genuine love.

      • Christine says:

        That’s what stuns me the most too, Sugarhere. The queen was actively involved in making sure the Spencer tiara didn’t see the light of day. Wow.

        They might as well box up the Bandeau tiara and FedEx it to Meghan, none of those salty racists are going to put it on their head ever again. I will be shocked if it is seen again in public, in my lifetime.

      • Sugarhere says:

        @Christine. Yes, absolutely. I think it would have been a meaningful gesture for Henry to have his wife wear his mother’s gorgeous head piece. Meghan sporting the Spencer tiara would have been redolent of the spirit of Diana. The whole symbolism, Diana’s invisible yet palpable presence through the jewel HAD to be stopped.

        Perhaps not Queen Elizabeth’s initial idea, but I can picture William making an appointment, rolling to the floor, and begging his grandmother to intervene: if Catherine didn’t have it, why would Meghan? To placate the brat to the throne, Angela and the Queen devised that proposition for a new pick, which doesn’t make sense from a sentimental perspective.

        H & M can still get the Spencer heirloom for their vows renewal 😊 or make sure PRINCESS Lilibet can wear it?

      • snappyfish says:

        The Spencer would have been a disastrous choice. Most of the brides who have worn it have had awful marriages. Diana, all of Charles Spencer’s brides. I also question that the sister’s would have offered it as it belongs to Charles and his is squirrely at best. He has always been of the opinion it is for Spencer blood only, either by birth or marrying into the Spencer family. He even took it back from Diana. Meghan looked lovely in the Bandeau. It suited her well and was the right choice.

      • L84Tea says:

        @Feehalori, I am trying to google all the emerald and aquamarine tiaras, but I’m sure there are ones that the public have never seen. I’m wondering if the emerald one Harry spoke of was the one Eugenie ended up wearing. It was beautiful, but definitely suited Eugenie more than it would have Meghan. As for aquamarine tiaras, there are a few, but I’m wondering if it was the Five Aquamarine Tiara. It could have easily been some other one we haven’t seen (Queen Mary seems to have had oodles of tiaras that no longer see the light of day), but if it was the Five Aquamarine Tiara, I’m glad she skipped it. It’s not one of my favorites. The bandeau really was the best choice.

    • DouchesOfCambridge says:

      They absolutely did not want to accommodate them with any of the Queen’s tiaras. But since they also didnt want to have any referenced to Diana in anything let alone a BF wedding so they just had to offer. Meghan’s tiara on her wedding day isnt the Queen’s priority at her age. But depending on how the courtiers spins things at her and what they recommend, she just picks the recommendation she likes better. And the courtiers knew they were gonna make it extra special for the couple.

    • May Bench says:

      The queen should have gifted Meghan the crown as they’ve done to other royal brides. So sick of the royal family and their racist hate.

      • CourtneyB says:

        They haven’t gifted any of the royal wedding tiaras except ones purchased specifically for the bride—ie sarah Ferguson and Sophie. Kate doesn’t own hers. Beatrice and Eugenie, despite being princesses, don’t own theirs. I think the only exception is Princess Anne but even that may just be a life loan.

    • This Angela Kelly is as spiteful and execrable as the rotas. Doesn’t she get her orders from the Queen? Who is she to break and ignore the order from the Queen. These courtiers are horrible. They really act more royal than the real royals. Swell-headed they are.

    • Flynn says:

      You know QEII only offered a tiara when she got wind that the Spencer tiara was in play. It would have showcased Diana’s memory yet again, and lending Meghan a tiara was her way of tamping that down a touch.

    • Anance says:

      @Beck1 I hate to say it, but the bandeau is not only a more substantial tiara* than the Spencer
      tiara, but it fits Meghan perfectly.

      *Before anyone thinks I’m denigrating the Spencer tiara, please note how large the center diamonds are in the Queens Mary’s bandeau. I’ve seen the Spencer tiara and it looks a bit chintzy – the diamonds are not large, it is made of silver not white gold or platinum and it was made from pieces of other jewelry dismantled in the late 19th century.

      Besides, Meghan is too modern for all the curly cues of the Spencer. The family has another diadem fit out with enormous stones in the style of a medieval king’s crown.

  2. Seaflower says:

    I would have paid good money watching heads explode as M walked down the isle in the Spencer tiara. Willie and Khate would have been livid.

    I love that he is still close the his Spencer aunts.

    • Chloe says:

      I love that he is close with the spencers too! And i hope we’ll see them at one of his spencer cousins wedding that is set for march.

    • Couch potato says:

      And an atomic bomb reaction from Ma Middleton.

    • Coldbloodedjellydonut says:

      I don’t know if there would ever be an appropriate event for Meghan to wear that tiara outside of her wedding, but it would be delicious if one came up and the Spencers were willing to lend it again. She is a princess, after all.

      • CourtneyB says:

        Had she continued as a working Royal her wedding one likely would’ve been hers or a new one commissioned Ala Sophie. She would’ve attended state dinners and what not. But the British royals as a whole attend way less tiara worthy events than the continental ones.

      • Tia says:

        Yep! Someone said it’d be cool if she got to wear it at the coronation. I hope there would be an event where she needed one and they’d be happy to lend her it.

  3. Aurora says:

    I think Chuck and Willy intervened when they found out about the Spencer tiara. Chuck wanted no reminders of Diana and Willy felt if Kate couldn’t wear the Spencer neither should The American Actress.

    It was so sad reading about all the micro-aggressions and obstruction Meghan had to experience just to marry Harry.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      Remember the story about William demanding that Meghan be banned from wearing any jewels from the Royal Collection that Diana had worn? Because I do.

      Considering the fact of the cultural and political importance of a mixed race woman marrying into the RF, they should have been very observant with not treating her differently because that would be signal their racism to the public. If the Spenders hadn’t offered the tiara and Meghan had married without one that would have been such a clear signal to the public and especially to the communities of PoC in Britain. How dumb they are. They are simply too racist to help themselves and would have simply cut their nose off to spite their face, which is what they eventually didn

    • equality says:

      Yeah. I bet Kate wasn’t even offered it. The Spencers offered Meghan the tiara and TQ took her on the train in a one-on-one event much sooner than Kate. You know W&K were mad.

    • Jais says:

      I would pay money to be a fly on the wall to have seen and heard Kate and Carole when they learned that Meghan was going to wear the Spencer tiara. You know they were freaking out, hyperventilating and probably vomiting all at once.

    • Otaku fairy says:


    • Molly says:

      The Cartier Halo tiara Kate got was (relatively) TINY. The queen wore it as a teen, and Margaret and Anne wore it when they were 20. Kate’s the future queen, and she had to wear such an entry level piece. You know she was mad about it.

      Which means there’s no way Charles and William would have let Meghan walk down with the Spencer tiara sparkling all big and historic while Kate’s wasn’t even taller than her hair.

  4. Grumpier says:

    It’s almost as if someone incandescent had got wind of M wearing the Spencer tiara and sought to put a stop to it!

    • Chloe says:

      Wasn’t it a story once how william worked together with angela kelly to make sure meghan wouldn’t be able to wear any crown jewelry including those that his mother wore…. Makes you think.

      • ArtHistorian says:

        There was indeed such a story.

      • Becks1 says:

        All those stories are starting to come together and make a lot more sense.

      • ABritGuest says:

        Yep! I think this episode, where the BRF suddenly offered Meghan tiaras after learning the Spencers had offered to lend Meghan their iconic one & then Angela Kelly being difficult with giving access to the one decided on, is where that story about William & Angela decided that Meghan was banned from wearing royal jewels worn by Diana previously came from.

        A real bunch of bullies

  5. Moira's Rose's Garden says:

    So am I reading this correctly-the only reason she was offered a tiara is because word got back to the firm that she was set to wear the Spencer tiara? As queen of FAFO, I’da been like, yeah no I’m good and rolled up to the church with the one that had been offered first.

    • SussexWatcher says:

      Same. Especially when AK47 was ignoring their calls to bring the tiara.

      I would have loved for Meghan to wear the Spencer tiara and to see the incandescent heads of Willy and Keen and allllll of their nasty supporters exploding all over Salty Island. Can you imagine the what the response would have been when she was first seen in the car on the way to the church?! That would have been so much fun, especially knowing now what we know.

      Also, I love your username ❤️

      • Brassy Rebel says:

        It was very generous of Harry’s aunts to offer the tiara so I would have had a hard time saying, thanks, but no thanks to them. However, imagine what AK would have leaked to the tabs if Meghan had said, thanks, but no thanks to the queen. She was, once again, put in a no win situation.

      • Christine says:

        Yep, Brassy Rebel, I completely agree. I’m willing to bet the Spencer aunts were completely aware and understanding that Meghan couldn’t possibly turn down the queen, and once again, the royal family was terrorizing someone who married into the family.

    • Lorelei says:

      @Moira, SAME!

    • Peachy says:

      Aaaaaaand so would I. If I were feeling nice, I’d have brought a box of tissues for them.

  6. Andy Dufresne says:

    I wonder what it would’ve been like if Meghan had worn the Spencer Tiara?

    Also, Angela Kelly is nothing but an entitled mean girl-wonder where that b*tch is now lol

    • Chloe says:

      She would have been blasted for wanting to be like diana.

      • Brassy Rebel says:

        The palace would have leaked that Meghan demanded to wear Diana’s tiara. And that Harry pitched a fit: “Whatever Meghan wants, Meghan gets!”

    • blue says:

      AK still lives in the apartment her boss gave her but had to give up the keys to the rest of the palace.

  7. Nightshade says:

    Maybe I’m just too damn American but I’d have gone and used the Spencer tiara and told Angela and old Lizzie to go f*ck themselves. I hope Harry never sets foot back in England.

    • KD says:

      As much as I don’t want Harry and Meghan to step back on that island it’s just not realistic. They both have projects and people they care about there and I’m pretty sure they’ll be back often for those very things soon but especially as their kids get older.

    • Laura D says:

      @Nightshade – no you’re not too damn American at all because this Brit would have done exactly the same! It makes no sense that TQ would wait until the veil had already been designed to offer use of a royal tiara unless of course the thought of Diana and Charles’s wedding being mentioned caused heads to spin.

      I think by the time they were offered a royal tiara H&M were doing everything to keep the peace. They were in the midst of “beardgate”, “bridesmaiddressgate” and “baddadgate”. So to add tiaragate to the growing list of battles was just one fight too many. 🙁

      • Petra (Brazen Archetyped Phenomenal Woman) says:

        This show how Harry and Meghan accommodated/bend backwards to please the members of BRF and the Firm. It’s simply glorious they survived physically, mentally and spiritually.

    • Mirage says:

      Absolutely! She should’ve said to Lizzie: “too little too late, mate”
      and worn the beautiful Spencer tiara.

      • susan says:

        she could not, full stop, turn down the offer from the Queen. although I think that once word got out that she was going to wear Diana’s tiara it became clear that BP would have to offer one of their own.

        Ultimately, the one she chose was a better fit both with her style and her dress.

        And Harry remains close to his aunts. Both Sarah and Jane were included in the family photo at Archie’s christening.

    • equality says:

      Not an option. PH especially, wouldn’t have snubbed TQ.

      • Laura D says:

        @equality – you’re right. I did think that after I’d written my post. The tabloids would have had a field day. As we’ve seen from previous threads the “industrialised hate” towards Meghan had already started by then so “Meghan snubs The Queen” along with all the other negative headlines may have pushed the poor woman over the edge.

      • Lorelei says:

        @Equality, I do see what you’re saying, but imo it really isn’t a “snub” when the Spencer aunts offered first, Meghan accepted, and her dress designer had already worked with the Spencer tiara in mind. It sounds like the veil was already finished? IDK. I just feel like they could have expressed gratitude and appreciation, but very politely explained to the Queen why Meghan couldn’t change her plans by then. 🤷🏻‍♀️

      • Brassy Rebel says:

        You’re being logical, Lorelei. When it comes to the royals and the tabloids, logic has no place. Meghan and Harry would have been ripped to shreds for “disrespecting” the queen.

      • North of Boston says:

        Another wrinkle is I’d imagine it would have put the Spencer Aunts in a difficult position … Meghan “disrespecting” TQ and favoring them.

  8. Snuffles says:

    I finally finished the audiobook this weekend. While there were a few new fascinating bits of information, the bulk of it was a rehash of old tabloid stories told from Harry’s point of view and him correcting false narratives.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled he did it and have been loving the interviews, but I’m ready to move on now. Mainly because I’m so excited about Harry and Meghan’s future and whatever projects they have in store. I no longer want their story mired in the toxic dreck of the royal family’s stories.

    The future is SO bright for them both and I hope this chapter of their lives is closed and they never look back.

    • ThatsNotOkay says:

      Did you get the sense that so many of the tabloid narratives that came out about H&M were the bad actors trying to get ahead of the stories of their bad actions and leaking a distorted version to the press, where H&M were made out to be the villains instead of the victims? Because I’m getting that VERY DISTINCT impression!

      • ArtHistorian says:

        Ditto. They feared that Harry and Meghan would play the same press games that they all did.

    • Professor Plum says:

      @Snuffles. SO MUCH NEW TEA! I was living for the part where H discussed meeting Kate for the first time. “I liked his new girlfriend. She was carefree, sweet, kind. She’d done a gap year in Florence. Knew about photography, art. AND CLOTHES. SHE LOVED CLOTHES.”

      This is shady AF. And I am here for it. Why haven’t we discussed all of the little breadcrumb asides???

      • Kate’s Jeggings says:

        I don’t think Harry meant it to be shady, lol. He can’t help that she does indeed love fashion. A lot of people do. He included art and photography among her interests, too. He didn’t say “Sweet girl. Relentless social climber. Obsessed with coat dresses and buttons. FOOK ME, THIS COW LOVED BUTTONS.”

    • Eurydice says:

      @Snuffles – ITA. H&M’s projects are so interesting and everything the RF does is so dull – I’m ready to see the next chapter, too.

    • Jenna says:

      I hope this, as well.
      Hopefully, the British media keep the Sussex’s name out of their mouths from now on.

      As if…..

      • aftershocks says:

        ^^ @Snuffles, for me, after all the leaks, some parts of the book were anticlimactic. Still, it’s so beautifully written. And there are passages and coming-of-age recognitions and challenges that tell us a lot about Harry. We can also sense the love he has for certain aspects of time, place, and royal traditions. He also describes some poignant episodes of rare connection with individual family members.

        There’s a lot in the book, as well as a lot Harry left out or abbreviated. We learned definitively that the friend whose Instagram was where H first set eyes on M, is Violet von Westenholz. She was always rumored to have been one of two or three possible friends instrumental in M&H meeting. We also now know what actually happened to Bogart, and to Guy (how his legs were broken before he & Meg moved to London). It’s so sad how both dogs’ lives were up-ended in Toronto, as they witnessed the anxiety and stress Meg came under in trying to nurture and further her love relationship with Harry. The harassment by the British media is largely to blame. Possibly, Bogart began to not trust or accept Harry, since H says Bogart, in his trauma, became more aggressive and ‘guard dog like’ to protect Meg.

        The public is being overwhelmed and exhausted by the continuing and endless false narratives from the BM. It’s horrific the way Meg & Harry were treated, and are still being treated. God bless the Spencers! At least Archie and Lili will get to know the Spencer side of their family.

  9. Digital Unicorn says:

    Like others I would have paid good money to watch Waity’s reaction to Meg wearing the Spencer tiara – both her and Ma’s heads would have exploded multiple times.

    And yeahs its been well known for years what a nightmare Kelly was/is – the family made no secret about what they thought of her and the rest of the household hated her as well. Rumour is she’s writing another book about QE2. Also they changed the locks for a reason – she would have pulled a Paul Burrell and nicked what she could likely a tiara or personal jewels.

    • Seraphina says:

      I think this speaks volumes on the late queen. To have such a menace as her right hand person, as her confidant. Liz must have known. Don’t you think?

      • Lorelei says:

        The Queen made a provision for AK to keep her housing for the rest of her life, right? So I guess they changed alllllll of the locks except the lone one on her door? LMAO

      • Rnot says:

        I think she was initially hired to keep her quiet about something to do with QE2 and Phillip. They met her while traveling and said they hired her because of her “discretion.” I wonder how often leverage was being applied against the royals by the staff in addition to the media.

      • RoyalBlue says:

        AK47 is gearing up to promote her book and make the round of the talk show circuits in the US of A.

      • Honey says:

        Re: Angela’s character- don’t overlook the fact that a person can be one way to you and another way to the people you love.

        So, Angela could have been all skinning & grinning and obsequious with QEII but AK47 with everyone else. I think it’s also important to remember that QEII was likely highly isolated and insulated from the day-to-day ordinariness of life—especially if she didn’t want to know about them. It’s easy for employees or so-called favorites or secretaries to take advantage and bend the arc in their favor in those types of situations. After all, how many people could readily get to the Queen. All types of collusion and misinformation could be afoot in those circumstances.

      • CourtneyB says:

        Not to mention AK worked her way in at a vulnerable point in the queen’s life. Philip was having health issues the last decade and the queen was losing a number of close friends and relatives. She’d been blessed that so many from childhood and young adulthood lived so long but it made the loss even more gaping. As more passed, AK stepped forward more and more. Very manipulative, especially considering she had more direct access than many and thus more opportunities for herself and to block others.

    • Nic919 says:

      There is even a meeting with Charles, William and Harry post wedding where Charles is complaining that he wants his own Angela Kelly.

      (This is is around April 2019 where William was mad at Charles for briefing against him. Charles claims it wasn’t him. But April 2019 is when the Rose stuff became a story).

      It’s pretty wild that Angela Kelly was so comfortable in her position that she felt she could treat the grandsons of her employer poorly, after the queen had met with them to present the tiaras.

      I can’t feel bad that Charles kept her out of the private chambers once the queen passed. AK was already crossing lines well before that.

      • Seraphina says:

        It blows my mind that she is a known menace and trouble maker and yet the queen still employed her and as @Lorelei stated, her housing too. Just a bunch of hateful people – the queen too because she enabled Kelly. Unless Kelly knew something that was to be kept under wraps at all costs. In the working world, I have seen people who continue to get a pass on bad behavior because they “know where the bones are buried and have receipts”. Eventually a changing of the guard (pun intended puts an end to that. Wonder of the same hold truth here.

      • Feeshalori says:

        Yes, AK really thought she was something special if she thought she could mouth off at Harry when she finally gave him the tiara. And it shows how high up she was in the queen’s estimation that she could be so disrespectful to him in delaying turning it over. And I also would’ve loved Meghan to wear the Spencer tiara, but she was really caught between a rock and a hard place by the queen’s last minute offer, but I’m sure the Spencers agreed that she should accept it. And, of course, the derangers can’t accept that Meghan was offered that tiara because they kept screaming that the sisters didn’t own the tiara and it’s not theirs to offer, it was the property of the Earl’s. It’s the family tiara, and I’m sure Charles Spencer had to be totally agreeable to his sisters’ lovely gesture.

  10. C-Shell says:

    The Spencer tiara is stunning and Meghan would have looked amazing in it, so I’m disappointed that didn’t happen, but the one she chose from the Queen’s offerings is beautiful, too. I finished the book last night and this part just made me BOIL. AK is a nasty piece of work and proof that the Queen had lousy judgment about peoples’ character, from her favorite son to the hag she allowed to be so intimate with her and her immediate family. It’s still incredible that AK’s flat out lies were allowed to stand, but she knew she was fully protected at the highest level and untouchable.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      AK is a nasty piece of work who once physically assaulted another member of staff! And she only kept her job because she was Liz’s favourite.

      • Digital Unicorn says:

        It was a proper fight from what I can recall of reading of the story – Ak was having an affair with the other woman’s husband, she confronted AK about it (asking her to back off) and then it erupted into a full on ‘rolling on the floor’ fight which AK started. I think the affair continued on after that.

      • blue says:

        The choice of AK as her bff tells me a lot about Liz, none of which is good or admirable.

    • Jais says:

      Everything about this story is infuriating. Offering a tiara at the last minute, AK then making it difficult, and then finally the story later being twisted to make Meghan seem like a bridezilla when that was no where near the case.

    • Ciotog says:

      It would have gone better with Meghan’s veil, I think, which I think kept those scalloped edges—her dress and the tiara did have such clean lines that the veil didn’t quite go with them, I thought.

      • Rnot says:

        I liked the contrast between the clean lines and the lacy scallops. It was delicate and traditional surrounded by clean and timeless on either side. Especially since the veil was supposed to be significant with embroidered flowers from every commonwealth country. The Spencer tiara is lovely but I think “Meghan’s tiara” makes for an overall more elegant and more Meghan look.

      • Ciotog says:

        I think the tiara suited her–it has a more modern look. I just think that if she’d been offered it initially, her veil would have had cleaner lines as well.

  11. Lisa says:

    does the Spencer tiara belong to Charles Spencer? He’s always seemed like an a$$ so I’m kind of nicely surprised the aunts were able to produce the tiara. And then I’m kind of surprised Charles Spencer didnt complain about it publicly.

    • Midnight@theOasis says:

      Wasn’t there a rumor that Willy enlisted Charles Spencer to talk Harry out of marrying Meghan?

    • Jan says:

      Yes, Charles Spencer is in charge of it, then it goes to his son.
      That is if it’s not sold for the upkeep of Althorp.

      • Brassy Rebel says:

        Male primogeniture in the British aristocracy is another toxic tradition. Imagine the older sisters going to their baby brother to get permission to loan a tiara to their nephew’s bride. 😡

      • Fortuona says:

        Celica McC wore it 2 months later at her own wedding

  12. Noki says:

    It’s a wonder how Meghan didn’t run foe the hills with all the road blocks put in place.

    • Petra (Brazen Archetyped Phenomenal Woman) says:

      She is in love with Harry. Also, I think she knew the games that were being played in order to break them apart. I give her all the flowers for loving so deeply.

  13. ROAA says:

    Yet, Harry still wants to go to the coronation. They will humiliate them. She will be the only *royal* woman without a tiara and he will not wear his military uniform.

    • Becks1 says:

      She should wear the Spencer tiara to that lol. Diana gets to attend the coronation in spirit.

      • Mooney says:

        Yep. Watch heads explode 😜 Meghan and Diana both on chuckys shiny hat day. Wails would be seething and Fiesta and side piece would be mad all over again.

      • Jan says:

        That’s what Charles Spencers’ wife will be wearing.

      • Jenna says:

        Is Charles Spencer’s wife even attending?

      • Christine says:

        Everyone with a big toe remotely in the vicinity of the aristocracy will be there, this is like their prom, that only comes around once in a blue moon.

      • Should they attend KC’s coronation, Meghan would be a standout 💯. Just like during the Queen’s Jubilee and her funeral. She always comes out more elegant, confident and chic than Kate. If she wears the Spencer tiara she’d be the biggest star and the most talked about royal in the coronation. The RF and the whole of Britain would accuse her of stealing the limelight from the King (and Kate).

    • equality says:

      Did PH say he wants to go?

      • Pati says:

        I mean is that a humiliation or are you possibly projecting.?. Maybe Harry and Meghan just don’t care about stuff like that… it’s all just so petty and it’s beneath them.. I don’t think they care.

        @equality it’s sound like from what Harry’s said they would go if some of their requests were honored aka apologies made, accountability, admitting wrongdoing, security, etc..

    • Jais says:

      Well, they tried to humiliate them at the funeral and I feel like it backfired bc the international press was like these people are being assholes and vindicating Harry and Meghan’s claims. Imo, Camilla, Kate and Sophie looked like evil witches at the funeral. In trying to humiliate the Sussexes, they usually just humiliate themselves.

      • Polo says:

        Yeah Harry and Meghan got more support from that chaos…so let them try again. They’ll continue to elevate Harry and Meghan while the firm and that family see a decline..

      • sriFoxi says:

        I think you’re right that it backfired. It was seeing footage of the funeral that got me fully on the H&M train. Really hadn’t paid much attention to the RF since their wedding which I enjoyed. I tuned in to much of the coverage of QE’s death and that’s when I saw how sh1tty they were being to Harry in particular with the whole uniform thing. I’ve been catching up on all the BS since then. They really miscalculated when they treated both H&M so poorly, and on an international stage.

    • Duch says:

      At this point in time they have enough of their own money they can buy their own tiara! Lilibet will need her own in due course. 🙂

      • Laura D says:

        I’d also add that unlike TK Maxx and Air New Zealand I’ll wager jewellers would be queuing around the block to loan Meghan jewellery for such a high-profile event (if she chose to attend.) It would be fab if she wore the Spencer tiara but, if for some reason she couldn’t, then I don’t think it would be too big an issue for the reasons stated above.

      • Blue Nails Betty says:

        @Laura I have no doubt every highbrow jeweler in America is ready to accommodate Meghan’s tiara/jewelry needs if she attends the coronation. Same thing with fashion houses. Meghan, who no longer needs to blend in, would be the best dressed person there.

        I keep imagining her in a sleek, deep purple gown with a tiara and jewelry that rivals anything the BRF musters up.

      • Jais says:

        Do guests actually wear tiaras to coronations? I don’t actually know much about it. So Kate will be wearing a tiara for it? Will other visiting royals? Or are we just joking about Meghan wearing the Spencer tiara to the coronation?

      • ArtHistorian says:


        – Tiaras are de rigeur at Coronations in the UK. All royal and aristocratic women wear tiaras. I don’t know about commoners but it may be the same protocol as the Nobel Gala (if you have one, you wear it)

        Incidentally, it is ONLY the British royals who still do coronations. In the rest of the European constitutional monarchies the new monarch is proclaimed by the PM as it should be.

      • Jais says:

        Thank you! Did not realize there would be so much bling for this coronation thing. Had assumed it would just be the crowns for Charles and Camilla .

      • Feeshalori says:

        Jais, if you Google images of the queen’s coronation, you’ll see so many of the attending female aristocracy wearing tiaras. Even the ladies in waiting were sporting them.

    • TheVolvesSeidr says:

      I must have missed this. When did Harry say he wanted to go to the coronation? I know he said he wanted his father and brother back, but under very specific circumstances (full apology, accountability) but I haven’t seen him say anywhere he wanted to go to the coronation?

      • Polo says:

        In one of the interviews they asked if they were going and he said he doesn’t know…the ball is in their court and that a lot has to happen…apologies, accountability, etc…

  14. Annalise says:

    I had thought that the Queen used to give all non-aristo royal brides, who didn’t already have family tiaras, a tiara for their wedding that would become THEIR tiara. Didn’t she do that for Fergie and Sophie? Probably no need to do that for Kate since she would eventually have the whole royal collection at her disposal, and clearly didn’t do that at ALL for Meghan. Meghan was NEITHER offered one to wear NOR was given one as a “wedding present” until they found out about the Spencer tiara… SMH….. can you imagine if she HADN’T been offered the Spencer tiara? Then there would have been no need for the Queen to offer one, and Meghan would have been the first royal bride maybe ever NOT to wear a tiara…..
    ….the optics of it…. 🤯🤯🤯

    • EBS says:

      I can’t believe I know this because I hate all the royals, but Fergie must have sold her tiara after the divorce, as otherwise one of Beatrice or Eugenie would have worn it at their weddings. Sophie had some hideous thing at her wedding that probably fell apart straight afterwards, she’s subsequently been given another one which Louise will probably wear when she gets married.

      • cws says:

        Fergie was a Duke’s daughter, she wore her family’s tiara, I think

      • Feeshalori says:

        Sarah’s father was not a duke. He was Major Ronald Ferguson, polo manager initially to the Duke of Edinburgh, and then later to Prince Charles when he was POW. She did not have a family tiara, which is why the queen purchased the one she wore on her wedding day.

    • Izzy says:

      For some reason I thought Edward had a tiara made for Sophie, but I might be remembering incorrectly and it was that fugly necklace she wore at their wedding?

      • EBS says:

        Yes, that’s right, he gave her the necklace and earrings. The tiara was made from four separate pieces that had belonged to Queen Victoria – the problem was that they very much still looked like four separate pieces.

      • Lorelei says:

        I usually don’t have strong opinions about tiaras either way, but my god, Sophie’s wedding tiara was *so* unbelievably ugly. She must have been mortified, lol.

      • Becks1 says:

        Sophie still has her wedding tiara. It got a slight tune up a few years ago and looks better, but not by that much. That thing is so damn ugly lol. And then I think she has an aquamarine tiara as well. I don’t know if that’s hers or just something she borrowed.

      • Feeshalori says:

        Sophie’s wedding tiara was redesigned a few years ago, but it’s still an awful mess.

    • Deedlebug says:

      It’s because Meghan was divorced. It’s a generational thing. Older generations viewed divorce as inherently shameful. So, getting remarried should be quieter. She didn’t expect Meghan to wear a white wedding dress either. Times have thankfully changed, but not everyone has kept up.

    • notasugarhere says:

      The story of Sophie’s awful wedding tiara has been detailed by others. Fergie arranged to borrow a tiara from Garrard. Eventually QEII&Philip decided to buy the loaner for her as a gift. That’s why she took it with her in the divorce, because it was hers personally vs. Sophie’s cobbled together loaner which is not her personal property. Sophie does own the necklace tiara with interchangeable centre stone, which was either a gift from Eddie or something she got from Middle Eastern buddies.

  15. EasternViolet says:

    My tinfoil hat theory is that Harry’s aunts got wind that the palace had not offered Meghan a tiara and time was getting close, in addition to looking for a great opportunity to make the Windsors publicly look awful again. The Spencer aunts made the offer, and made it “known”. When BP caught wind, they of course had to save face because there could be no association with Meghan and Diana. Had The Spencer’s not made the offer, BP would have sat on it, hoping the requests for a tiara would have come from Harry so Meghan could be smeared for sounding like a spoiled entitled American. Which they managed to do anyway.

    • sunny says:

      I agree with this take.

    • ChillinginDC says:


    • Mary says:

      @easternviolet, agreed and I think the rationale proffered by the Queen for loaning Meghan a tiara shortly before the wedding (instead of the Spencer tiara) was that her wearing the Spencer tiara would have been inappropriate.

      Sometime after the wedding there were rumors that Meghan had been offered the Spencer tiara to wear but it was decided that it was inappropriate because Charles Spencer was just trying to profit off of Meghan’s wearing the tiara. The idea floated was that Charles Spencer was looking to sell the tiara and was only offering it to Meghan to up the provenance and price (does this tie in with the weird rumors about the tiara now being Charlotte’s?).

      I think they accepted the Queen’s offer of a tiara because she indicated that wearing the Spencer tiara would be inappropriate for some bizarre reason. Otherwise, I think Harry would have been happy for Meghan to wear the Spencer tiara (remember that along with the “we don’t want Meghan to wear Diana’s jewels” stories it was also said that Harry was really pissed about it).

      As far as Charles Spencer goes, I don’t think he would have been happy to have Meghan wear the tiara but had to go along to appear like the Good Uncle. For all we know he is the one that leaked to William that Meghan would be wearing the Spencer tiara.

      • aftershocks says:

        ^^ We do not know exactly how Charles, Earl Spencer feels about Meg. He has said nice things about M&H publicly. Plus, Harry told us that Earl Spencer assisted them with the stuck boat on the lake, when they visited Althorp to pay respects to Diana, after returning to England from Dusseldorf, last September.

      • Mary says:

        @aftershocks, after Charles Spencer’s having sided with William in trying to convince Harry that Meghan was not suitable as a wife and his Instagram Watermelon Fest you are hard-pressed to convince me that Charles Spencer has been fully supportive of the Sussex marriage. I am not impressed by any performative niceness on his part.

  16. equality says:

    So tired of all the stupid “regulations” about brides. “No veil because you are divorced”. They can lose me on this garbage. Where are the rules for what men can and can’t wear because divorced, not a virgin, whatever.

    • Bklne says:

      Agreed. It’s a way of policing women, at its core, and we need less of that. Especially when it gets weaponized against women of color, and most especially when it’s a high-profile Black biracial woman marrying into the most elite and elitist white family out there!

  17. HeyKay says:

    I think it would have been lovely for them to have used the Spencer tiara.
    Bringing in Dianas side, could have been the something borrowed.
    Diana’s sisters were very sweet to offer, the Spencers are more aristo than the Windors.

    Look at Diana in that tiara, she made that thing glow! Diana really was iconic.

    • SussexFan says:

      You mean the Spencers are more royal than the Windsors. They’re directly descended from Charles II Stuart from the other side of the blanket.

      I think brides wear white because of the purity of their love, and NOT for the condition of their hymens.

      And I loved Diana.

      • Ciotog says:

        They’re definitely more *English* than the Windsors.

      • LynnInTX says:

        Brides wear white because one of the Queens of England (Victoria?) decided to show off how rich she was by creating a gown for her wedding that could only be worn once – because it’s white. It started a trend among the upper-class that eventually trickled down to the masses and stayed around. Before that, most wedding dresses were colorful.

      • CourtneyB says:

        Victoria wore white for the exact OPPOSITE reason. She wanted to go to her husband as a regular maiden and not a monarch. She forwent the traditional silver or gold and refused entreaties to wear either her heavy mantel or crown. Instead she wore a simple floral headpiece. The dress was richly embroidered in British lace and the dress itself woven in spitalfields—both attempts to bring attention to struggling British home industries. It DID start a craze for white wedding dresses that’s persisted to this day.

      • SussexFan says:

        @CourtneyB, right you are.

        @Ciotog, the Spencers are definitely more British.

        @LynnInTX, young women from the gentry and the aristocracy normally wore white at social occasions, especially during the REgency.

  18. Amy Bee says:

    The press hasn’t talked about this story because it debunks their initial story which was first leaked to Robert Jobson for his book on Charles and they don’t want the public to know that Meghan was offered the Spencer Tiara.

  19. Lili says:

    So they waited till the veil had been designed before offering Meghan a tiara from HMQ , it makes sense now that the Veil and tiara didn’t match Meg most likely had to choose one that didn’t clash or stand out too much. I guess this is part of welcoming her with open arms puft!

  20. Lorelei says:

    What am I missing here? Why couldn’t M&H have said to the Queen that they were so appreciative for her generous offer (🙄), but that Meghan had already committed to wearing the Spencer tiara, and her dress designer had actually designed elements of her gown with that in mind?

    I agree with @Becks1 that the one Meghan ended up wearing was *perfect* for her; understated like her jewelry always is, and she looked gorgeous. So it worked out in the end.

    But was it really out of the question for anyone to (very politely) not take the Queen up on an offer like this? Wouldn’t the Queen have understood that the dress (I know it was just the veil, but still) had already been crafted with the Spencer tiara in mind, and that Meghan’s dress designer had already put in a lot of work?

    (Not to mention that it seems kind of rude to happily accept the Spencer aunts’ offer to wear the tiara, but then months later, go back, like, “sorry, we got a better offer”)

    I guess at that point, Meghan was still so eager to fit in with that vile family and be accommodating, etc., that she didn’t want to be put in the position of saying “no” to the Queen in any way, but she *also* seems like the type of person who would feel terrible going back to Harry’s aunts and saying that actually, she no longer planned to wear Diana’s tiara— that she would want to honor her word to them?

    The Queen’s offer was just that— an OFFER. But within the family, I guess it’s viewed as more of an “honor,” and to turn it down is just…not done? It’s unthinkable?

    In any case, thank goodness H&M gotTF away from this entire toxic “family” and their petty nonsense.

    • Lorelei says:

      Too late to edit, but once AK started screwing around with them, ghosting them and refusing to give M access to the tiara, why didn’t they happily just go right back to Plan A? It seems like Harry has good relationships with his aunts, and they probably would have understood (they know better than most how that family operates), and been happy that in the end, M would wear the Spencer.

      And when the Queen asked Harry what happened, he could have simply told her the god’s honest truth: that Angela Kelly wasn’t allowing Meghan access to the tiara — after their MANY attempts to contact her— so they really had no choice but to go back to their original plan? At that point, he seemed to still have a decent relationship with Granny, and would have been able to schedule tea or whatever with her to explain.

      • Christine says:

        I’m guessing that the answer lies in the haste AK was fired and unceremoniously removed from any and all palaces, Lorelei.

        It’s like these people have never watched a single second of Dynasty, where a quirky secretary is always eavesdropping, only to end up a deranged stalker. Or watched a horror movie. The call is coming from inside the house! Granny is never alone!

    • Izzy says:

      Or else, and what my extremely petty ass would have done, is worn the Spencer tiara and been like, sorry Granny, but you see this long trail of emails and phone calls trying to get the tiara ahead of time to properly prepare? Your girl Ange blocked us so we didn’t have a choice, we had to go with the original plan, and I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to upset you or get Ange in trouble. *smiles wide, innocent grin.

      I am exactly that petty. But I do understand how Harry and Meghan were trying to keep the peace.

      • Lorelei says:

        Exactly! And I know that H&M we’re trying to keep the peace, but it was AK causing this drama, not them. They could have just done it quietly, without making any sort of scene or complaining to the Queen about AK, and simply told the truth if the Queen asked about it.

    • susan says:

      one does not *ever* say “no” to the Queen. even politely.

      Personally I think the palace was shamed into making the offer because they knew how it would look if Meghan showed up wearing Diana’s tiara.

      • ChillinginDC says:

        The story would have been that Meghan rudely refused the Queen.

      • Feeshalori says:

        I’m sure the Spencers were totally understanding why Meghan was unable to wear the Spencer tiara after the Queen’s offer, but she was really caught between a rock and a hard place because under normal circumstances, she should have accepted the first offer. But, as stated, you do not refuse the queen and that would have created even more of a mess.

    • Mary says:

      @lorelei, sorry, didn’t see your comment before I made one up thread. I think this ties in with rumors after the wedding that it was decided that Meghan’s wearing the Spencer tiara would not have been appropriate and that the Queen basically said Meghan couldn’t wer it. That is the only thing that makes sense to me in light of the good points that you highlighted.

  21. Emmi says:

    It’s not clear from the book why this happened the way it did or what the timeline was. Let’s not forget Meghan’s father was causing major shit drama so maybe the palace actually was simply late re the tiara question. Maybe it was Kelly’s assignment and she ignored it until the Queen asked what the status was. That seems like the most likely scenario to me, knowing what we know now.

    I’m sure Meghan would have looked gorgeous wearing the Spencer tiara (I like it better than the one she wore but that’s just personal taste) but it would not have gone down well. Heads would have exploded, people would have been screeching she wants to be the new Diana! All that crap.

    • WiththeAmericann says:

      What does her father have to do with the timing of the tiara?

      It’s not like there’s one person manning the palace, why would Tom have made the palace “late”?

      AK does one thing, she certainly had time and she has been tasked with it by the Queen.

      • Emmi says:

        Because it was chaos and these people are incompetent, that’s why. None of this makes much sense.

        And because Kelly didn’t want Meghan to wear a tiara, that’s pretty clear.

      • WiththeAmericann says:

        Emmi, incompetence sure, but there’s a whole department for tiaras. The PR department is separate.

        Tom Markle’s horrid behavior is no excuse for what Angela did, though I’m sure British tabloids will conflate these things, as if this was somehow Meghan’s fault.

  22. Mooney says:

    While it would have been great for Meghan to wear the Spencer tiara and watch heads explode, I think it’s good that Meghan wore the one that she chose for that day. This one is just much better and more in line with Meghan’s style. The Spencer tiara, while pretty, is just too gaudy and against Meghan’s minimalist aesthetic. Besides it was of a doomed marriage. Meghan made her bandeau tiara iconic.

  23. HeyKay says:

    This arguing about which tiara who is allowed to wear and when..OMG!
    99% of humans are struggling thru life and the 1% goes on having family jewels and tiara fighting. It’s just surreal.

    All these royal families are 200 years behind the times.

    • WiththeAmericann says:

      There’s definitely this element too! It’s hard to believe Charles thinks he’s modernized this circus when they’re keeping all the stolen jewels and the court pettiness.

    • HamsterJam says:

      I wasn’t tiara fighting, it was racist tiara fighting. Racism is also one of the reasons 99% of humans are struggling.

  24. what's inside says:

    The clarification of what really happened is just awesome. Harry and Meghan really tried hard to make it work with the BRF, but unfortunately being The Queen really doesn’t mean much when it comes to power. A real monarch would have at least ruled their own household which does not sound at all what was happening. Meghan must love Harry a whole lot to have put up with all of this and marry him knowing what was going on.

  25. bisynaptic says:

    She should have gone with the Spencer tiara.

  26. Jan says:

    The Spencer’s Tiara is problematic, the BRF family Tiaras are made up of stolen gems.
    Just this weekend saw an article about Queen Mary, who was not exactly a kleptomaniac, but every where she visited, people hid their valuables from her, because she expected them to give her.
    Princess Margaret seemed to have developed her grandmother’s grift.

  27. MsIam says:

    My thoughts on the tiara debacle is that the royal family was planning on the wedding never happening. William giving Harry a hard time about the location for the wedding, Jason Knauf colluding with Toxic to throw a wrench in things, it was just one thing after another with that family. I feel the “no tiara offer” was just part of the plan to get Meg to throw in the towel.

    • Tessa says:

      Plus some in the media hoping the wedding would be stopped so Meghan could go and see her father. I remember the dm comments in run up to wedding.

    • HamsterJam says:

      That is an interesting theory, but that would mean that Granny was in on the “no wedding” or she would have offered a tiara in a more timely fashion.

      • MsIam says:

        I think “dear old granny” was part of it too. Didn’t Harry say in the book that when he asked for the queen’s permission to marry she said “I suppose I have to say yes” or something equally rude? And then that “friend of the queen “ who said the queen felt Harry was “too in love” with Meghan? I think the queen in a very passive aggressive way was part of the run Meghan out of town bunch. Or another theory could be they wanted to see if Meghan was after the jewels and would balk if she got no tiara. Either way that bunch is full of backstabbers from top to bottom.

    • Honey says:

      Yeah, I can understand how/why the whole episode left a bad taste in H & M’s mouth.

      I’m going to say this, which I didn’t say at the time of the wedding cause it would have been rude, but the wedding, M’s gown, hair, and tiara, and the flower girls all looked a bit shoddy to me and hastily thrown together. I’m sorry but there it is. I know a few people (myself) included commented on the fit of M’s dress and the craftsmanship at the time but the tide was against us. In an ironic and crazy way and now that I have learned about the context & background shenanigans at the time of the wedding from H’s perspective, I can now left my thoughts and feelings about the gown go.

      • Jais says:

        I didn’t notice anything about the bridesmaids dresses looking a bit shoddy. Nothing at all. The bandeau tiara was lovely on her, not shoddy imo. People will disagree about the fit of Meghan’s dress and hair. I’m in disagreement with your assessment. The dress and Meghan’s overall look gets more classic as time goes by. It’s modern and simple and the pictures are glorious. The look is still fresh and won’t age as trends change.

      • Renae says:

        @Honey I totally agree. The girls gowns looked like they were basted together and they did not fit well at all.
        I also must confess I was not a fan of Meghan’s wedding gown. I can’t decide if it was the fit or the style but I was not a fan. I did like her hair and veil. However, if she had worn the Spencer tiara, I think the veil would have been lost.

      • Isa says:

        I’m pretty sure Meghan’s dress wasn’t fitting properly because of stress related weight loss. In the book, Harry even talks about how she was advised to gain some weight to try for a baby and that it was really difficult for her bc the weight just fell off.

      • notasugarhere says:

        I thought the flower girls dresses were fine. You don’t want them fussy, frilly, or too tight, that’s a nightmare. Meghan’s dress looked like an homage to a Givenchy archive gown that Audrey Hepburn wore in an photoshoot. It wasn’t meant to be skintight, it was meant to be loose and skim-not-cling.

  28. ❌❌❌Tart ❌❌❌ says:

    Sorry ladies. This is not the end to the tiara story. I have read that Angela Kelly is writing another book, and my guess is she will respond to Harry there. So this dumb story will live on no doubt.

    • Jais says:

      AK seems so horrible. I’m thinking her book will inadvertently continue to make her look terrible.

    • ChillinginDC says:

      I hope she goes into how she got tossed out after TQ died. Loathsome woman.

    • notasugarhere says:

      If she does, she’s doing it with Palace approval. She would have been required to sign multiple NDAs just like all the other staff. She breaks that NDA by writing about Harry and Meghan (and QEII and everyone else), she’s doing it with permission.

  29. Blue Nails Betty says:

    Sidenote if allowed, if not then delete away mods:

    Does anyone here have a tiara? I bought one a few years ago (Amazon) and it turned out to be a replica of the The Girls of Great Britain and Ireland tiara. I wear it when I’m writing, riding my exercycle, or housecleaning. 😁

    • Danbury says:

      I bought one when I was working in Lebanon – they sell them on every street corner as women wear them at weddings, parties etc. Last time I wore it was a few years ago, now it’s sitting on my Baby Yoda plushie hahaha
      I should wear it more

    • Julia K says:

      Wear it in good health and be Queen of your castle. Curtsey 😅😅

    • Becks1 says:

      I got one from Amazon a few years ago for a renn fest costume 😂😂😂 it’s surprisingly heavy.

      • Blue Nails Betty says:

        I was surprised at how sturdy mine is. It has the combs on it which help keep it where I put it.

    • Eurydice says:

      I have a tiara – I wear it with my yellow rubber gloves when cleaning the bathroom.

    • Jaded says:

      We bought tiaras from the dollar store and wore them at the office while watching Kate and William get married. I later gifted it to my next door neighbour’s 5 year old. She loved it.

    • Melissa says:

      I have a copy of the Cartier tiara that Kate wore. I liked the style and it was very well made—no cheap pageant crown here, looked like the real thing. I wasn’t trying to copy the copy keen herself! I just liked the tiara.

    • Alice says:

      Yes, on my father’s side. Nothing like those massive pieces in the RF, of course.

    • SenseOfTheAbsurd says:

      For some unknown reason my partner was telling me that he preferred sapphires to emeralds. I replied that I’d keep it in mind next time I commissioned a tiara. Don’t think I’ve ever been more sarcastic.

  30. Emily_C says:

    I don’t really think it’s that Lizzy had bad judgment in people. I think it’s that she liked the Angela Kelly type of person, and was able to hide behind them as they perpetrated bad behavior while pretending her hands were clean. Chuck is exactly the same — it’s what he does with Camilla and with a lot of courtiers and his vile friends. Willy’s heading down the same path with Kate and Knauf, but Willy has a tougher time hiding his temper.

    • WiththeAmericann says:

      This. She wasn’t innocent in all of this. Why she let AK undermine her own wishes I can’t say, unless she begrudgingly offered the tiara and wanted to extract pain.

  31. TheOriginalMia says:

    I would have loved for Meghan to wear the Spencer tiara. I think it would have been a lovely tribute to Diana, but ofc that was never going to happen once the Windsors found out about it. They weren’t even going to offer her a tiara to wear until they found out the Spencers would. Couldn’t have Diana’s tiara associated with Harry’s bride when William’s bride was never offered it. Couldn’t have people remembering what Earl Spencer said in the church about Diana’s former in laws.

    The less said about Angela Kelly, the better. What a miserable, entitled woman.

  32. HeyKay says:

    I’d like to see M wearing the Spencer family tiara.
    Maybe H&M and the kids could take a photo w/M wearing the tiara with a smaller version for L.

    The roof of BP would blow off. 👍
    Of course, it would not be taken in jest. No humor allowed by C or W.

  33. Crowned Huntress says:

    How I wish she’d worn the Spencer tiara instead especially after learning that she and her wedding dress designer had put so much effort into making the veil mirror the scalloping on the tiara.

    Such pettiness and bad form all around from Harry’s paternal side of the family. The fact that the Queen had such a miserable person as her closest companion or helper just makes me uncomfortable. Too many employees felt justified in abusing Harry and it’s enraging!

    And to think the pair of them wanted to elope!

  34. Julia K says:

    I believe that the Queen and AK were both surprised that Harry accepted the tiara offer. It sounds as if the Spencer tiara offer was well known and they would go with it, so a” courtesy ” offer was made so as not to look petty or cheap, not believing they would accept and switch out tiaras at the last minute. Probably why AK was spitting bullets; in her mind, it wasn’t supposed to actually happen this way.

    • L4Frimaire says:

      Harry didn’t frame it as a courtesy offer and I think the palace were well aware of the implications of Meghan wearing the Spencer tiara. In the book, he mentioned there was even a debate about whether she’d even be allowed to wear a veil. I think it was more about optics, because if she wore Diana’s tiara, it would bring up the question of why she wasn’t lent a royal tiara, etc. etc.

      • MsIam says:

        Or why Kate didn’t get to wear the Spencer tiara, lol. I really think they hoped Harry and Meghan would have some type of budget civil ceremony like Charles and Camilla instead of a world wide event with media coverage.

      • notasugarhere says:

        Charles and Camilla had a registry office wedding, but 800 invited guests attended their blessing service at St George’s Chapel Windsor. Not exactly budget in the end.

  35. L4Frimaire says:

    I think the tiara Meghan wore suited her perfectly but it would have been amazing if she had worn the Spencer tiara. Also, the press stories surrounding this whole thing were so wildly inaccurate, acting as if Meghan demanded access to the royal jewel vaults. Anyway, she looked beautiful and there was no drama until Angela Kelly decided to be a menace.

  36. Isa says:

    I know she probably couldn’t have turned the Queen down, but once Angela didn’t return the calls I wish they would’ve just went with the Spencer crown and explained to the queen later what a snake Angela is.

  37. Interested Gawker says:

    And after the brouhaha with Meghan’s father over coming to the wedding how delicious would it have been for Charles to walk her up the aisle with the Spencer tiara on!

    I do think the one she wore was perfect on Meghan, it had a modernity to it even though it was old fashioned.

  38. ChillinginDC says:

    I am glad she wore what she did. And I think this just again shows that most people didn’t have an issue with Meghan. Just some random racist POS like Kelly did.

  39. QuiteContrary says:

    I am kind of superstitious so I wouldn’t have gone with the Spencer tiara — too much bad mojo.

    I thought Meghan’s wedding look was perfect — chic, elegant, the opposite of Kate’s old-fashioned lace gown. That should have been a hint to Kate that Meghan wasn’t interested in her fashion contacts.

    • Mary says:

      I would have worn the Spencer tiara but only after I smudged the hell out of it! Heck, I probably would have even called in a priest!

    • Dee says:

      Meghan’s look was all hers. Classic. Timeless.
      Kate’s was a remake of Princess Margaret’s wedding dress, down to the boob darts, with added frippery. More lace, more embroidery. Kate’s veil was awful.
      And now we know why William looked so puffy. He was hungover.

  40. rea says:

    Kelly’s actions were known by the queen to say she was the only bully is a lie. The queen had higher authority and if her actions were genuine she would have reached out to them sooner to lend them a crown. But its pure optics to save face and not create a scene in the public when Diana’s crown came out in the wedding. The queen was a smart lady and she knew who she had around.

    • Tootsie says:

      The queen was there when Meghan tried on tiaras and green lit everything. She even told them that it can be tricky to fasten the tiara so Meghan should have a trial run. Then she left it up to Angela who was the person who didn’t answer the phone calls. I think the queen assumed that they would do what she asked without trying to follow up on things. That was a mistake. What seems to happen throughout the book is that her courtiers and staff LIE to her and don’t listen to her wishes until they absolutely have to do it. Awful people.

    • Lov3zone says:

      Agreed! Granny was a str8 up evil woman periodt….aint nothin about her pure…just a royal pain in the arse!

  41. rose says:

    I am quite confused with AK’s role. On wiki it says she’s a a British fashion designer, dressmaker, and milliner, but I saw somewhere that someone mentioned that she’s literally wrote books about important pieces of royal jewelry, and that she was responsible for maintaining the jewelry etc., so i thought she probably has some credentials-probably a historian or jeweler, but it seems she doesn’t. They also had a historian with them-so does this historian manage the royal jewellery, and does AK manage this person?? You’d think it’d be separate, equal-standing roles, given the significant importance of the royal jewels and the fact that AK doesn’t seem to have any credentials for maintaining jewelry.

    • CourtneyB says:

      I’m guessing the jewelry expert present was possibly Hugh Roberts. MAYBE Geoffrey Munn (who is the nicest man) and is now retired.

  42. Dee Kay says:

    I haven’t got to this story in Spare yet so I am reading it for the first time here and I have to say, I am going to go against the majority interpretation and say the Queen sounds very sweet in this anecdote. I see it as the Queen being elderly and not really aware of how soon the wedding was taking place; the courtiers realizing it would look bad for them if Meghan wore the Spencer tiara (b/c why didn’t the Queen offer her one); so had the Queen make the offer, the Queen was like, Oh good yes let’s do a tiara selection day with Harry and his fiancée; then AK got up on her bitter hag high horse and played nasty keep-away games with H&M. I think the Queen comes off pretty well, she just didn’t know or control what her courtiers got up to. Which imo is one of the main problems with the whole Firm (the other one being the disastrous relationships to the lying tabloid press).

    Now that we know all these details about the goings-on behind the scenes of the wedding, it’s a real testament to H&M’s grace and love for each other and sense of style and charisma that the whole event looked so lovely. Their smiles were bright, they had hearts in their eyes, they looked absolutely beautiful, individually and together. They didn’t let the stress show, except that Meghan lost a few pounds right before the day, which I think accounts for the fit of both of her gowns (a little big on her — but not enough to ruin either look, for sure).

  43. Plums says:

    I’m of the same mind as most others here. The family and institution thought they were sending an exclusionary message by denying Meghan a tiara, then collectively went OH SHIT when they found out she made plans to wear the Spencer Tiara that Diana wore, and scrambled late in the game to make sure that didn’t happen. Which didn’t prevent Angela Kelly from still pitching a fit about it and being a racist piece of dogshit.

  44. Iris says:

    I refuse to believe that Meghan didn’t actually want to wear Diana’s tiara tbh. but she was offered a tiara by the Queen and saying no wasn’t an option.
    I’m not sure they would have let her without a tiara on her wedding day that would have looked very racist or am I still being too generous and there’s a chance that they didn’t offer her a tiara until they learned she had access to Diana’s ? I just have a feeling that Meghan wanted to wear Diana’s.

  45. Linney says:

    What I’ve always found strange about the tiara story is why set out multiple tiaras if one of them was “off limits?” You don’t ask someone to choose from a variety of items only to say “oh, sorry, even though I said you could have one, you can’t have THAT one….” Was this sloppiness? A mistake? Someone deciding the tiara Meghan picked was “too grand” for her? And then to treat her in such a manner after a tiara was decided upon? I don’t recall other royal brides going through something like this.

  46. Lov3zone says:

    This is WHY G-d never allowed meto marry a Prince because I would have worn THE SPENCER tiara without a doubt and turned “Granny’s” mean ass down FLAT. Nope thanx Gran Gran but she would rather…

  47. TheCrankyFairy says:

    I understand why they didn’t, but I really wish they had gone with the Spencer tiara.

  48. Nerd says:

    I don’t think that the Queen was the one who would have approached Meghan about a tiara for the wedding. I think that Angela would have been the one expected to approach her with options and the fitting. I think once the Queen learned that the offer hadn’t been extended, that is when she invited them for tea and to try on tiaras in her private dressing room, which Harry had never seen before. It is obvious that Harry saw and experienced a closeness with the Queen and the Spencers that continued in private even long after they left the UK. I am happy that Meghan at least experienced some level of welcome from some members of his family. I believe that his Spencer aunts (maybe uncle), the Queen and Philip had a special bond with him and Meghan. I think of the photos of Archie’s christening with his aunts. The inclusion of them in any announcements from Harry and Meghan. The photo of Archie meeting the Queen and Philip for the first time. The way Philip made a point to be at their wedding following his hip surgery. There was a moment when walking to their seats at the wedding when Philip paused and looked proudly at Harry and it was the sweetest interaction between the two of them. Harry’s boyish smile at that moment was one of my many favorite moments from that day. It was a beautiful wedding and I think the tiara Meghan wore was perfect for her on her wedding day, just as Diana’s was for her.