Meghan Trainor: ‘Birth is traumatic… I’m nervous I have to do that again’

Meghan Trainor is pregnant with baby number two. This is wonderful news, of course. And expected, Meghan’s been telling us she wanted to get pregnant as soon as possible. But, like most decisions, now that she’s gotten her wish, she’s realizing the downsides. Like actually giving birth to the baby. In Meghan’s case, that’s a real concern because she had such a difficult birth with her son Riley. She had an emergency C-Section and Riley had breathing issues and was in the NICU for five days. While speaking with Yahoo’s parenting series, So Mini Ways, Meghan said she’s nervous about giving birth again because it’s pretty traumatic.

Meghan Trainor’s first experience with childbirth was a rocky one: Son Riley — who turns 2 on Feb. 8, just a few days before the pop star makes her Super Bowl ad debut for Pringles — was breech and had to be rushed to the neonatal intensive care unit after being delivered by a C-section that left his mom in a “dark place.”

But the “Made You Look” singer is trying to stay in a positive mindset as she prepares to give birth for the second time this summer. Last week Trainor, who is married to Spy Kids actor Daryl Sabara, announced that she’s pregnant again (and yes, she knows the sex and has a name picked out, but plans to “torture” fans by keeping that all private for now). This time around, she’s hoping for a smoother journey, she tells Yahoo Life.

Trainor recounts a conversation she had with her OB/GYN about 10 weeks into her new pregnancy, and admits she’s trying to wrap her head around making decisions like whether to have another C-section or try for a VBAC (vaginal birth after Cesarean) this time.

“[Riley] didn’t come out awake, you know, so I asked her, ‘Well that was like a fluke, right? It was very rare,'” Trainor says. “She was like, ‘yeah, it probably won’t happen if you do another C-section.’ But, you know, birth is traumatic for everyone involved. So I am nervous I have to do that again, but I do want four kids, so I’m halfway there.

“I just know I’ve got to surrender,” the Grammy winner adds. “That’s my big word: surrender. Surrender for one day, and for a bunch of pain. But I’m going to be distracted with the love of my life, you know?”

[From Yahoo!]

I understand all of this. I would be scared too if I’d gone through what Meghan did. But she wants a lot of kids so she’s determined to push past it. Fortunately, she also knows how quickly issues can be resolved, hopefully that will bring her comfort. Riley turned two on Wednesday and Meghan is due this summer. I gave birth 25 months apart and my doctor told me absol-freaking-lutely not to a VBAC. He didn’t forbid me, but he strongly advised against it. I didn’t have strong feelings and I did have large-headed fetuses, so I was fine with a second C.

Meghan is also releasing an advice book for new moms. It’s called Dear Future Mama: A TMI Guide to Pregnancy, Birth and Motherhood From Your Bestie and comes out April 25. Meghan said she got advice from experts for the book as well as her own concerns and experiences. It was borne of her being the first of her friend group to get married and have kids. She didn’t feel like she had anyone to talk to about everything that was going on with her as a new mom. So she wrote this book for other women who also don’t feel like they have anyone to go to.

I just realized something, Meghan Trainor’s side-by-side toilets are actually going to come in handy soon. They will be effective in potty training her kids. She’ll have the last laugh after all!

Photo credit: Instagram and Cover Images

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22 Responses to “Meghan Trainor: ‘Birth is traumatic… I’m nervous I have to do that again’”

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  1. Nicole says:

    Althought I loved the idea of a VBAC, I opted for another c-section with the second because I knew what to expect in terms of recovery, etc. and that put me at ease.

  2. Sigmund says:

    I had an unplanned c section. The birth was traumatic and I had bad PPD/PPA, so we are one and done.

    I’m glad people are gradually opening up about how birth and postpartum can be really difficult. Just because childbirth is common doesn’t mean it doesn’t have its risks and challenges.

    • HelloDolly! says:

      Yes, totally agree–people don’t tell you enough about the challenges. I had an emergency C-section giving birth to my son, and I really disliked being pregnant–I had nauseau for months while working full-time, fainted during a routine ultrasound, experienced bad sciatica, took weeks to recover from the c-section, etc. My son turns 4 in 2 weeks, and I am turning 40, and I just don’t know if I have it in me to get pregnant again. A part of me does want a second child, but it’s also really hard for me to imagine doing that whole experience all over again.

      • StrawberryBlonde says:

        My son turns 4 in two weeks as well (March 3). And I am 41. I know I don’t have it in me to do pregnancy and the baby stage again. We were committed to one and done. You will figure out what is best for you and no matter what you decide it will be what is right.

      • HelloDolly! says:

        Thanks, StrawberryBlonde–truly. I have been stressing about it, truth be told. Hugs.

    • Becks1 says:

      I thought my first birth was traumatic (unplanned c-section, long labor etc) and I also had PPD/PPA, and it was really rough. In some ways the second child was healing, bc I did not have PPD so I was able to enjoy the newborn phase in a way I didn’t the first time around.

      But, my second c-section was way worse and much more traumatic (it was very long, lots of scar tissue, etc) and so while I always wanted lots of children, my doctor said a third would be complicated, and no way should I have more. So we stopped at 2.

      I felt really funny for a while describing the birth as trauamtic because that just seemed so extreme but once I more accepted that it had been traumatic and I had some PTSD after it, it helped me to move forward.

      C-sections are rough and I think they’re so easily brushed over as being the “easy way out” or “not real childbirth” both of which are extremely problematic.

  3. SquiddusMaximus says:

    I think this is a great opportunity to re-affirm that pregnancy is a no-shit serious medical condition with wide-ranging effects — AND NO ONE BUT A WOMAN AND HER DOCTOR SHOULD BE IN THE POSITION TO MAKE DETERMINATIONS ABOUT IT.


    Delirious congrats to Meghan! We’re working toward Bebe2 right now (I am so sick of sex this month), and I took have some minor PTSD from my last birth. Double nuchal cord, manual placental extraction… cripes. The decision to be pregnant is a biggie. Republican trash fires need to cease existing.

  4. Bunny says:

    All of mine were vaginal births, but the last almost killed me, literally. They had to restart my heart. It was a nightmare and remains traumatic all these years later.

    I wish other methods of childbirth were given equal footing in hospitals and society at large; C-sections, not being on one’s back during labour, being better about managing pain, acting to assist the mother before she’s utterly exhausted, more and better support after the baby is born. No guilt, no negative comments. Support for the mother and baby.

    • Betsy says:

      I don’t totally mean the shade to the OB profession I’m going to share here, but I obviously do a little: supporting the woman would mean the obstetrical profession would need to see women as people and I’m not convinced they do.

      And holy hell that last birth sounds terrifying.

      • KateyDi says:

        Agree with Betsy. The way women are treated during birth in this country is appalling and the stories and outcomes back it up. Can’t recommend a midwife approach enough if you’re not high risk. I had two amazing births with my midwife (who was from South America and could clearly see how abusive and money hungry the American birth system is and called it out) and wish everyone could have a similar experience.

  5. James says:

    My sister is getting artificial insemination and it’s really exciting

  6. ama1977 says:

    Congratulations to Meghan and all of the expectant CB moms, too! I hope that Meghan (and anyone else who had a traumatic/chaotic birth and is expecting again) gets a smooth, safe delivery this time around. Childbirth and pregnancy are no joke!!

    I had two largely uneventful vaginal deliveries but my second was born with the cord wrapped around her neck. I didn’t see it but my husband did and it freaked him out (he’s an attorney and had handled some childbirth med-mal cases). They got her pinked up in the delivery room with minimal intervention and no NICU time, and she was able to nurse almost immediately. He was worried about that affecting her for the first year but we’re very lucky that there were no lasting effects. She walked and talked early and now is a strong, smart, beautiful, precocious 10 y/o!

  7. Terri says:

    My first vaginal delivery went poorly, 34.5 weeks, he was 4# and turned in the birth canal because he was tiny. He had to be vacuumed out and was in the NICU for 6 days. I was in a wheelchair for two days.

    I feel her on worrying about a second delivery and still not being over the first one. All the worry and my second one was uneventful.

  8. Marion says:

    First baby: traumatic VBAC and the worst postpartum
    So traumatized I waited 7 years to try for the second one: Labor induction but the best birth ever ♥

    • SAS says:

      Have I misunderstood VBAC? Vaginal birth after caesarean?

      I’m so glad things went well second time around! Birth trauma and PPD is no joke Xx

  9. Celina says:

    I really wish they could beam babies out a la Star Trek. I’ve had both VBs and CSs. Tried VBAC twice. It wasn’t happening. It’s tough to know what the right choice is for an individual person. ((And it’s sucks arse that they are trying to take choice away in the US!!!) The highest risk scenario is an emergency CS after you’ve been attempting labor so there is that to consider. Just get baby here in the safest, most pleasant way possible, I say. That looks different for different people.

  10. Dani says:

    Thank you for posting so much about different female issues, such as breastfeeding and difficulty giving birth. These topics are definitely not discussed enough. Trying to breastfeed my son was one of the hardest things I had to do in my life, and one of the things that contributed to my post-partum anxiety and depression. I remember being shamed by nurses and other moms for not trying hard enough to breastfeed, even though I felt like I was trying so, so hard. It almost broke me. And not to mention how giving birth, infertility and miscarriage forever change you as a person. I wish more people would talk about these important topics.

    • Christine says:

      I feel you so hard, Dani. I never produced enough milk for my son, and had to supplement from day one. Some of the comments from nurses and other mothers at the hospital had me in tears, and even though my son is now 13, I still feel a sort of shame for not being able to produce enough milk for my child, literally the only point of my (large) boobs. I nursed him until he was 2 years old, and looking back, I wish someone had just said, “it’s okay if he only gets formula, it isn’t going to hamper his brain development.”

      People absolutely need to talk about this stuff, all the time, and loudly.

      My family was sympathetic, but one sister in law had twins and produced enough milk daily after feeding them that she was pumping for a donor bank, and the other had 4 children she nursed well into toddlerhood with zero issues. They were kind when they offered every single suggestion people make in this situation, but it still felt like sh*it.