Prince Harry: ‘My partner is an exceptional human being & I’m eternally grateful’

Prince Harry spoke a lot about his wife and his two children during Saturday’s conversation with Dr. Gabor Mate. Harry met Meghan in the summer of 2016 and he credits her with “saving” him in many ways. I do too – the argument they had where Meghan basically told him to try therapy again or else she was out? That changed his life and saved his life. But she’s saved his life and his sanity in a million other ways too, notably showing him that there are other ways to live, work and parent. Harry’s journey is about breaking generational cycles of abuse, neglect and trauma, and he spoke to Dr. Mate about that as well. Some highlights from their talk:

Harry on how Meghan saved him: “People have said my wife saved me. I was stuck in this world, and she was from a different world and helped draw me out of that. But none of the elements of my life now would have been possible without me seeing it for myself. My partner is an exceptional human being and I’m eternally grateful for the wisdom and the space that she has been able to give me.”

On racism: Harry also said that he had a “crash course” in racism since meeting Meghan. “I think what people perhaps don’t understand is the pain that it causes to an individual is huge, but then the pain that it causes to society is immense.”

The lack of physical contact after his mother died: “It leaves me in the position how as a father, I have two kids of my own, making sure that I smother them with love and affection,” Prince Harry said, joking that he doesn’t “smother them to the point that they’re trying to get away. But in the sense that I as a father feel a huge responsibility to ensure that I don’t pass on any traumas or negative experiences I’ve had. And that’s work, that’s putting in the work, and daily, being conscious of my behavior, of my reactions to both of my kids. And there are times when I catch myself in a moment when I should be smothering them with that love and in that moment, I might not be, reminding myself [to]. I wouldn’t have been as aware of it had I not done the therapy and work that I’ve done.”

Agency as parents: “To be able to change the root cause of so much of those issues, to be able to up, move, that to me, feels as though it gives me much more of a chance, and my wife, more agency as parents, to be able to bring our kids up in a way that’s really beneficial and good for them,” he said. The Duke of Sussex added that he had “an incredible childhood, elements of it, and elements of it were incredibly painful.”

[From People Magazine]

“My partner is an exceptional human being and I’m eternally grateful for the wisdom and the space that she has been able to give me.” I like that he gives a lot of credit to Meghan for saving him, but he also acknowledges that he has been doing the work. And it’s true – it wasn’t like Harry and Meghan had a fight, he agreed to go to therapy and everything was “fixed.” You have to do the work every day, you have to unlearn toxic behaviors, you have to phase out unhealthy behaviors. I think we would probably be shocked to see just how different the Sussexes’ parenting styles are compared to the parenting style of, say, Will and Kate. And fundamentally, the best thing Harry did for his children was… move to America. Move them out of the toxic fishbowl, move out of an environment where everything is transactional and the British press felt like they “owned” his children.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid, Instar, Netflix, Cover Images.

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39 Responses to “Prince Harry: ‘My partner is an exceptional human being & I’m eternally grateful’”

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  1. IForget says:

    What beautiful sentiments. What a nice healing balm in opposition of so much of the abuse that is flung their way. Breaking out of generational trauma and thriving is no easy feat, and I agree wholeheartedly that it’s daily work that needs to be done. But it’s inspiring to see others go through it, and gives me strength to do it myself.

  2. Trix says:

    I saw the Derangers getting all deranged that he used the word “partner,” that it obviously means the marriage in in trouble and/or it’s a business arrangement. Honest to effing God these people,

    • Kel says:

      Lord these people will go to such lengths to spread their misery.
      He literally said wife a few times in there lol. Smh

      • Osty says:

        Their princess said she was William’s assistant and they were ok with it . I would take my husband seeing me as his partner than his assistant but that’s me

    • MsIam says:

      The same derangers that complain about how many times Meghan says “my husband” in a speech or article? These “people” need to have several seats, it’s always something with them.

    • Karhleen says:

      The derangers listen more closely than the fans.

  3. Polo says:

    The first to break the cycle goes through hell but it’s worth it for future generations.
    I think of parents that immigrate to different countries and the hard work and suffering they go through so that their kids can have a better life and thrive.
    Like Harry said you don’t make a lot of friends along the way but it’s worth it for their kids.

  4. ThatsNotOkay says:

    Best thing he did for his kids was have Meghan be their mother.

  5. Well Wisher says:

    The Sussexes are blessed with an unshakably instant bond from the moment they met, Harry decided that he wanted to live, the very night he saw Meghan on Instagram.

    How they met, formed an organic relationship, marry and now parent seem fortuitousness..

    But was it just that?
    Harry had the good fortune to met someone at the right time he decided to embark on a new path….
    He is a lucky man, and he knows it…

    I am sure that as much as the conversations are remarkable, the silence is just as comfortable…

    I love how they 💘….

    • HeatherC says:

      That is something that is so completely underrated….the comfortable silence. When you can just….be….with your partner/spouse/even close friends. The need for quiet at times isn’t talked about enough.

    • BayAreaGirl2000 says:

      I think their instant bond is one that I can never get tired of seeing or hearing. I’ve never seen anything like it before. They were side by side since the second date in two days?! Love is
      Fascinating and as someone who is trying to break generational traumas like Harry, seeing love like this helps remind of what’s on the other side.

      • Anna says:

        I don’t want to boast but same with me and hubby. We met, he came to my house and stayed for three days. No, it wasn’t about sex, we just didn’t want to be apart from the moment we met. We know we are lucky, and this is so rare but 12 years together and not his changed in that department.

        But, both of us were is unhappy relationships or lonely before, and us being together is also because we didn’t want to settle and we’re looking for this special bond.

      • Jojo says:

        @ANNA. Me too. I met my husband on a night out with my cousin & some of his friends. We all went back to my cousin’s house after the restaurant where me and, my now, husband sat up all night, after everyone else had crashed or left, talking and playing chess 😂. We had 5-6 dates over the next month, then it got to where we were meeting up most days after work because we didn’t want to be apart and after just 3 months we moved in together. Everyone said we were being crazy. A year later we got married and a year after that we had our son.

        We celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary last year and we are still just as in love as well as being best friends too. I was late 20’s when all this happened and if you’d asked me even the month before I first met him if falling in love could happen so organically & so fast I’d have laughed in your face.

  6. Maxine Branch says:

    What impresses me with Harry is his authenticity. He speaks from the heart and anyone who listens to him walks away feeling heard and listened to. He is most definitely on a journey, a good journey which he has indicated he will continue with the love and support of his family. He is helping so many with his sharing and I continue to wish this couple a continuous thriving environment where they can continue to grow into a solid family filled with empathy and love while helping others along the way.

  7. What an absolute sweet man Harry is to the love of his life. This can’t be copied. You have to really feel it. Harry and Meg are a true love story💕

  8. Miranda says:

    I can’t say enough about how much I admire and appreciate Harry talking for about all this publicly. I know from experience just how difficult it can be to open up even to your own therapist at first, and I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to share these things with the whole world. But Harry has the courage to use his enormous platform to encourage others to seek help and tell them that they’re not alone in their feelings, and that it’s possible to overcome their past. Meghan is a huge part of that, too, showing how to be supportive of a partner or friend who is struggling. I hope they both know what an impact this openness is having.

    • Christine says:

      I am right there with you. He came from a family where a pat on the knee and being immediately left alone, for hours, was a suitable amount of “comfort” after the sudden death of a parent. It must feel completely opposed to everything he ever knew, or what he is comfortable with, to share so many really personal stories from his life, with absolute strangers. Harry is so brave, and I love that he finally has someone in his life who is a stalwart support.

      • Jojo says:

        @CHRISTINE That story never ceases to amaze and disgust me. How could anyone, let alone a parent, for a moment leave a child alone like that without comfort, care and love after delivering such news. I wonder what William’s story of his father’s visit to his bedroom that day would be. Was he also patted on the knee and left to develop a suitable stiff upper lip to get through the rest of the day with. The whole scenario simply beggars belief.

  9. Cessily says:

    I am just happy to see him look at peace with life. You can tell he loves his life in California and what he is building with Meghan and his children. That is all that matters. The toxic noise from 💩isle is just that “noise”.

    The spin the the rats are using is dangerous.. the use of “drugs” isn’t going out and buying psychedelics it is actually a micro dose therapy done under a doctors care more people should understand this is experimental but has had phenomenal results for many. It certainly is a much better quality of life than taking high doses of Xanax 3 times a day to just be able to survive. As someone who deals with ptsd the misinformation they are putting out there is extremely upsetting.

  10. Amy Bee says:

    The best thing he did for his mental health and that of his family was to leave the Royal Family.

  11. Jais says:

    When I think about what would have happened if they hadn’t left when they did. Am so happy that Archie Lili and Meghan are in Montecito.

  12. equality says:

    I like that he makes it clear that he is making his own decisions and Meghan isn’t “leading him around” like the derangers want to claim.

  13. Over it says:

    Happiness and peace is what I want most for Harry ,Meghan and their children. I don’t know why I care so much that they must have this because I don’t know them . I just know that that get more hate and mistreatment than any one human should ever have . So happiness and peace i pray for it daily for them

  14. J. Ferber says:

    That magical header picture says it all. England can kick rocks.

  15. swiftcreekrising says:

    I keep thinking about the concept of the “spare” and how the BRF bends over backwards to pretend that it’s all in Harry’s mind, and one scene in The King’s Speech keeps coming back to me – it’s the one where Bertie sings that his nanny wouldn’t feed him. That she would pinch him before handing him to his parents so they’d give him back and he’d be left alone. He was the spare too, before his brother decided to abdicate. We know that Margaret was kept from marrying the man she loved. How TF do these people still think we don’t see them? That we don’t realize they’re all parading around in their velvet with their jewels and swords playing like they have some higher calling all while being just sad, petty, SMALL human beings? UGH.

    • notasugarhere says:

      Margaret was not kept from marrying the man she loved. Letters in the Royal Archive prove her sister arranged it so Margaret could marry Townsend and 1) keep her titles 2) keep her royal housing 3) keep her royal stipend 4) keep her engagements. Her children would not be in the line of succession because The Church of England wouldn’t recognize their marriage. Margaret chose not to marry him.

      Honestly why do people keep praising Townsend? He groomed Margaret from a very young age. He was a married man in his 30s having a sexual affair with a 16 year old. When he was 45, he married a 20-year-old whom he’d been ‘dating’ for two years. Margaret’s life still would have been bad married to him, just bad in different ways.

  16. Giddy says:

    The RF resents Harry so much for being happy.

  17. Nanea says:

    Harry wanted to leave for a very long time.

    It’s good to see that the universe sent him someone who encouraged him to find the necessary tools to do just that — look for help to find the inner strength to break the infinite cycle of abuse, the way that only the direct line of heirs count while everyone else is replaceable, with seemingly no individual rights nor possibilities to develop a well-rounded personality.

    Happy for Harry and Meghan that they support each other as equals, and for Archie and Lili to have such loving and caring parents.

    • Rana says:

      He didn’t want to leave, he was just talking about wanting to leave without making any effort to do so. Actions speak louder than words. Also, Harry didn’t leave or step down voluntarily, he was forced to, (in his own words). He still wants his father to give him a role in the Commonwealth, but Charles still refuses. Had Harry married a white woman, he would still be in the UK as a senior working royal.

      • Jojo says:

        ‘Had Harry married a white woman, he would still be in the UK as a senior working royal.’

        But he didn’t and he’s not.

        The reason he’s not is not because of how they treated him his whole life. That he put up with and would have continued to put up with until it eventually broke his spirit completely.

        The reason he’s no longer there is because he was strong enough to fight so that someone else, someone he loved, didn’t have to try to survive the hatred, gaslighting and bullying. It took him seeing someone else’s suffering and the cruelty being meted out through another’s eyes to finally pull him out of his ingrained apathy & denial and begin to push back.

        His innate caring nature saved him and saved Meghan.

    • solidgold says:

      Harry wanted to step back from being a working royal, but he wanted a relationship with his family. IMO, he wanted what his cousins have, their own profession but still being included in family events.

  18. QuiteContrary says:

    I totally get what Harry means when he says he learned a new language in therapy that the royal family does not speak or understand.

    It’s sad, but William being William — lazy and entitled — likely means he’ll never do the work that Harry has done, and continues to do, to become a better and more loving person. And Kate, for all her so-called mental health advocacy, would never do it, either.

    I also really admire Harry for being open about all of this. His candor is going to do a world of good for other men and military veterans, both male and female.

  19. Patricia says:

    I remember Harry saying, during the Oprah interview, that his father and brother are “trapped.”. A perfect description of their desperation. All of that has been validated over the past years. I feel little or no sympathy for the royal family but I have such admiration and respect for the Sussexes. They have ” escaped” to a world of love and kindness. Well done, your children will call you blessed. Best wishes.

  20. j.ferber says:

    So what I see after the endless drama of Harry’s d-ckhead family is a true love story and a true and whole family for Harry and Meghan and the two little ones in California. There’s a lot to be angry over on their behalf, but in the end, THEY are the ones with true love, kindness, insight, an excellent work ethic, worthy goals and a great life. That’s what they deserve and what they have. For all of that, I am happy for them. They just need to put the English family and some members of Meghan’s family on mute forever. They have something very precious that they have made together.

  21. blunt talker says:

    This part of the session I really liked-not to bring your trama and bad experiences on the next generation-his children-he enjoys seeing how his children are growing and thriving since moving to Montecito-Harry and Meghan should know a great deal of the US population love seeing them thriving and growing here too-like I said the other day Harry is putting in the work to improve his life and mental health and that of his wife and children-he looks so fatherly when he talks about his family-I also liked that he said the royal family don’t like someone living freely in life and enjoying it.-they want everybody in the royal family to be grumpy and miserable all the time-I guess this shows the royals are doing work for the British people. God bless the entire Sussex family.

  22. Beverley says:

    Meghan and Harry were fated to find each other. What a bounty their love must be! Their youngsters are blessed to have such serenity and joy surrounding them. My hope is that they all live happily free, thrive, and prosper in safety and peace.