Following the announcement that Spotify and the Sussexes had parted ways, there was a good deal of gloom and doom as British “experts” tried to convince the British public that Harry and Meghan were in danger of going broke and that Brand Sussex is in shambles. What’s funny about that storyline is that the British media could only keep up that pretense for a few days before they had to admit that, actually, Harry and Meghan are fine and they’ll probably continue to build their empire post-Spotify. They’ve all convinced themselves that Meghan is going to bring back The Tig (she should, but these people just want her content) and that Meghan is going to be even more powerful now that she’s signed up with Ari Emmanuel at WME. Speaking of, the Mail had this bizarre exclusive about how “everyone” in LA is talking about how Meghan will bounce back from the Spotify mess. Apparently, everyone thinks she’s on the verge of signing up as a brand ambassador for Dior. Which is what I’ve been saying for a while, that Meghan should do that?

As rebrandings go, this one is being handled with the precision of a military campaign. When the news ricocheted around the world that Meghan Markle’s Spotify podcast had been axed – amid bitter accusations that the Duchess and husband Harry were ‘grifters’ (American for ‘con-artists’) – her high-octane Hollywood team were already on a war footing. Headed by powerhouse agent Ari Emanuel, the charismatic chief of talent agency William Morris Endeavor (WME), the mission to re-invent Meghan is already well under way, The Mail on Sunday has learned.

If the rumours swirling around LA are true, she may be on the brink of signing a major deal with French couture house Dior to make her a face of the company, alongside global stars such as Rihanna and Jennifer Lawrence.

‘Meghan is all anyone is talking about,’ a prominent Beverly Hills socialite said last night. ‘There have been rumours for weeks that she’s about to sign a deal with Dior which has put the gossip mill into overdrive. If she pulls that off, then no one will remember that her silly little podcast got cancelled after one season.’

‘We knew the Spotify announcement was coming,’ a source at WME told me. ‘It might be a shock to everyone else but we’ve been working on the rebranding of Meghan for weeks. Ari is the best in the business when it comes to corporate deals and making money. He’s excited to be representing Meghan and has thrown all his energy into it. The offers have been pouring in, including from other podcast platforms.’

Reputation crisis expert Eric Schiffer says Team Meghan will use the drama to their advantage. ‘These guys were already on a war footing because they knew the Spotify announcement was coming. Ari will have a strategic and tactical battle plan in place to link her with sophisticated brand partners, like Dior. This is an opportunity to distance Meghan from the negativity of the past. It’s no accident that she didn’t go to the Coronation, that she didn’t show up in London alongside Prince Harry when he was in court recently. Meghan is wise to distance herself from her husband’s toxic dramas. This is a woman who constantly moves forward. This is about building a global brand. There will be some big deals announced soon.’

One insider who used to work for Oprah Winfrey – who turned a daytime talk show into a billion-dollar brand – said: ‘Meghan could end up being worth hundreds of millions of dollars.’

[From The Daily Mail]

Is it just me or was this weirdly complimentary from the Mail? Yes, they got their jabs in, but the larger point of the story is that Meghan is fine, she’s got a great team at WME, Ari Emmanuel is going to get her lots of deals and brand ambassadorships and the Sussexes will remain fabulously rich. Now, is a Dior ambassadorship coming? I hope so, truly. I’ve felt like that’s what she should have been doing for a few years now, she should get some big-money brand-ambassadorships with tasteful ad campaigns. Dior would be a good fit. So would Ralph Lauren, honestly.

And no, Meghan wasn’t avoiding the UK because of her “brand.” She literally doesn’t give a f–k about those awful people who abused her. It’s hilarious how they’re still grasping for a “reason” why Meghan didn’t bother coming to the stupid Chubbly – she didn’t want to go, so she stayed home with her babies, end of.

Update: So, all of the eleventy billion stories about “Meghan will sign with Dior, no, both Harry and Meghan will sign with Dior” are obviously horsesh-t. The Sussexes’ people denied the story, which means that – gasp – the Mail doesn’t have sources close to Harry and Meghan, nor does the Mail have industry sources in LA? Shocking!

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Instar, Cover Images.