While most of the havoc that’s been wrought this past month has been hatched by other people and simply handed to Trump to carry out, I wholeheartedly believe that this ploy of renaming the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America is 100% Trump’s baby. That’s his level of discourse. Thankfully, Stephen Colbert’s level of discourse is much funnier and cleverer. The Late Show host read Trump for filth this week, over Trump retaliating against The Associated Press for not going along with the renaming of international waters. Stephen also managed to shine a light on another, if unlikely, profile in courage: MapQuest?!
“Late Show” host Stephen Colbert on Monday called out “petty and vindictive” President Donald Trump for going after The Associated Press after the news agency refused to use the term “Gulf of America.”
“The Associated Press keeps calling it the Gulf of Mexico because that’s what it’s called,” Colbert pointed out.
But Trump is so angry over the refusal to go along with his name change for the body of water that he’s banned The Associated Press from the Oval Office and Air Force One indefinitely.
“You can’t get mad at The AP for not using your stupid name,” Colbert said. “The thing you should get mad at The AP about is not using the Oxford comma in their style guide, OK?”
As Colbert pointed out, a number of other companies, including Google, Apple and Axios, have gone along with the name change.
“But, ladies and gentlemen, a lone hero stands tall,” Colbert said. “Because MapQuest continues to list it as the Gulf of Mexico.”
Colbert offered an exaggerated salute to the often overlooked company, then made some references to the time when MapQuest was launched — a pre-Google and pre-smartphone era in which the mapping company was far better known.
“Pack up the Buick LeSabre, we’re going back to 1996,” he said. “Grab your collection of Beanie Babies and get ready to dip-frost your Dunkaroos because MapQuest is showing us the shining path to revolution, and it is an eight-page printout that you accidentally did in full color and your mom’s gonna f–king kill you for it.”
Of course, he acknowledged that there could be a reason other than an “outrageous act of rebellion” for MapQuest’s decision.
“Deep in my heart, I want to believe that this stand they’re taking is because of the noble convictions of everyone at MapQuest,” he said. “But it is possible that there aren’t enough people still working at MapQuest to update anything.”
First of all, THANK YOU, Stephen, for raising awareness of the noble Oxford comma. And before you start (or continue) laughing at me, please watch the full clip. Stephen makes an impassioned yet logically-sound plea for little OxCom, in a grammar lesson you will never, ever forget. Though I’m sure if you mentioned the infamous punctuation to Trump, his only response would be a demand to rename it the “Harvard” comma. Which brings me to point #2: Trump is so f–king dumb. Is this whole renaming stunt an attempt to erase from our collective memory the fact he totally failed on his first term promise to build a wall and have Mexico pay for it? Well, Trump may be an idiot supreme, but all the people kowtowing to him are cowards, if not traitors. So carry on, dear MapQuest crusaders! Even if it’s like Stephen said, and there just aren’t enough workers to update the system, still take the accidental win!
And thirdly and lastly, dammit — now I want some frost-dipped Dunkaroos!
Photos credit: Janet Mayer/Instarimages.com, Mapquest.com and via YouTube and Instagram/The Late Show
Stephen needs to NEVER retire. Periodt.
I’m a huge Oxford comma fan. I once worked as a book editor using the Chicago Manual which exalts the Oxford (or as they call it Chicago) comma. I’ve never been able to get on board with AP on that point, but they’re on the correct side of history here.
I’ve been a fan since before I even heard the term! Seriously, back in Mrs. Sutter’s 7th grade English class, that’s what we were taught. There was no label, other than ‘grammatically correct’. And that’s how I continue to write! (Well, I try to be grammatically correct; no guarantees.)
Love it! I’m sure Mrs. Sutter would be so honored that you’ve taken her lesson to heart.
I never used the Google map and last week I deleted iPhone maps and downloaded Mapquest. I’m not playing with these trash tech companies and their bowing to a Nazi.
Has Trump started ordering new maps yet? So he can put them in all the schools to say gulf of America. Right next to the 10 commandments in Louisiana schools. That’s the only money he would ever spend on education. Actually no, he’ll force the schools to buy it from whichever friend he gives the map-making contract to. Discounts for homeschools and private christian colleges.
It’s still called Gulf of Mexico here in Europe, but Google put that offending attempt at faking facts in brackets underneath.
What is enraging though, on behalf of Native American/First Nations communities, is the fact that Google have renamed Denali, without any kind of explanation that another name exists. Posting about Denali, well, that other name, has been deactivated. I just looked.
Disgusting cowards, those people at G.
I like Evie’s husband a lot, but while the Oxford “,” is something I could theoretically get behind, it’s never been taught properly, no matter in which country I went to school.
Apparently it’s due to drilling rights – there are decrees or some legal docs that say you can’t drill in the GoM (or it’s limited or something), so renaming in theory nullifies this.
This was from TikTok so take with a pinch of salt and my retelling is probably missing key points, but given everything else they’re trying to do, this wouldn’t suprise me.
Also enjoying the narrative around magas continuing to dead name people and people switching the convo re GoM to align with this and showing the hypocrisy.
Biden prohibited drilling in the Gulf of Mexico as part of an agreement with other Gulf bordering nations.
MapQuest also has a fun feature that lets you change the name of the Gulf of Mexico to whatever you want. Gulf of Blithe — for example. In a quarter that has not included much to laugh about, Colbert and MapQuest have made me smile. I celebrate our Resistance wherever I can.
Gonna have to go back to using maps the old fashioned way at this rate.
I love Stephen Colbert…..that is all.
I actually used mapquest app for years until about 4 months ago when they started making me watch 30-60 second ads (usually Temu ones) before showing me my route