I finally got around to watching Marty Supreme… and was supremely disappointed. It’s not that I can’t stand an unlikable lead character — I dare say sometimes I prefer that! But with each unfolding scene, I kept thinking, “It’s like this film is DARING you to enjoy any moment of it.” Plus, without spoiling anything (as if you could), I totally did not feel the last scene was earned. It was beautifully acted by Timothée Chalamet, but it was not believable based on the 149 minutes prior. (Also, what a waste of Fran Drescher and Sandra Bernhard!) Still, there was one, fleeting moment that I did actually get a real kick out of, and it was all Gwyneth Paltrow! Gwynnie plays an actress who makes a big comeback on the stage, and there’s a moment where her back is to the audience but the camera is on her face as they’re applauding her. It was sheer perfection! Hilarious and honest and so relatable. It reminded me that, damn, Gwyneth is a really good actress! If only she’d stuck to that instead of the overpriced, under-scienced monstrosity that is Goop.
And speaking of, Goop Kitchen unveiled its first NYC storefront last month, which is why Gwyneth was on The Today Show this week to film a cooking segment. Gluten-free, grain-free turkey meatballs were on the menu, and Gwyneth shared a tip no trained chef has ever uttered before: arugula is a good substitute for dairy.
On May 27, Gwyneth appeared on the show alongside Savannah Guthrie and Carson Daly to make her gluten-free, grain-free turkey meatballs.
But while her Goop Kitchen recipe used a cup of Parmesan, Gwyneth opted for an unexpected substitute. “If you want to avoid dairy, one trick that I do is I dice up arugula, and I put it in,” she said, leaving Savannah visibly shocked.
“It sounds weird, but it kind of adds a nice texture to it, and it’s delicious,” Gwyneth insisted.
Reacting to the clip, which has been viewed over three million times on Instagram, internet users couldn’t help but poke fun at Gwyneth’s replacement:
“If you want to avoid arugula you can just replace it with a little dairy. Sounds crazy, I know”
“I just added arugula to my morning coffee—in lieu of dairy—in my stories, feel free to see how it turned out”
“I’ll try it in my coffee right now!”
“When I don’t have milk for my pancake mix, I just add lawn clippings🤷🏻♂️”
“If you want to avoid arugula you can just put some dirt in it sounds weird but it kind of adds a nice texture to it?
“When I run out of croutons for my salad, I just grab a handful of mulch from my garden”
But at the same time, some people found the replacement disheartening:
“The way we have normalized being a afraid of food is wild”
“That just makes me feel sad”
Meanwhile, others questioned if the entire thing was “satire”:
“Is this rage bait”
“This is satire surely hahahahhaa”
“What a wild take”
Ok, before we even bite into the main course, I have to point out that Chef Goop was at peak Gwyneth right from the start. Carson Daly takes the mushrooms she just rough cut and puts them on the burner, telling Gwyneth that he also went ahead and added the garlic for her. This is how Gwyneth said thank you: “Ok, I would’ve done that later, but whatever.” Priceless! See, I told you I enjoy unlikable characters on screen! And then the arugula of it all… Savannah Guthrie didn’t merely look shocked, she flat out said, “Really?! That’s weird.” The thing that’s so distinctive about arugula is that it’s peppery, which is not an adjective I typically associate with dairy! But this is where the internet served its best purpose, because these comments are positively sending me. “I just added arugula to my morning coffee” is brilliant. And as for the suggestion this was satire, well it is, but wholly unintentionally on Chef Goop’s part. And true to form, Gwyneth rounded out the segment with a very lofty, self-important explanation for what Goop Kitchen is: “We helped busy working parents feel really good about takeout.”
Lastly, Goop made headlines a couple weeks ago for massive layoffs, saying they were “pivoting to AI.” Can’t wait to see how AI will make all those meatballs.
Photos credit: SS/Avalon, Jeffrey Mayer/Avalon, Maddie Knight/The Academy/Avalon, Image Press Agency/Image Press Agency/Avalon and via YouTube
Could she have confused it for something else? Like oatmilk or something 😆
Arugula has high amounts of calcium and vitamin K so it’s a green that’s good for bone health. That probably would’ve been a better way of saying it then suggesting you can replace dairy as an ingredient in this context.
Yeah, when I read the headline it was obvious what she was actually meaning vs … headlines. Lol non event. No one needs to take the rb but loads will get all in the feelings
She probably meant to say arugula is a good source of calcium. A cup of raw arugula contains 32 mg of calcium, making it an excellent plant-based option for vegans. Besides it has like 5 calories, and this is obviously a woman obsessed with her weight.
We can blame Gwyneth’s kids for Goop lol. She started it when she became a Mom and stepped back from acting to raise them, but still wanted to make money and Girl boss. So yeah…thanks a LOT Apple and Moses! LOL.
Interesting watching people’s view of Paltrow evolving online. Seems like she’s slowly shifting from ‘internet villain’ for all her Goop/out-of-touch crap, to the idea that she’s some kind of eccentric auntie living her best life with no fucks to give. People seem to be growing almost fond of her (tongue-in-cheek?) ‘screw the peasants’ attitude. Kind of like how attitudes have changed towards Mariah Carey. I guess it started with the hilarious skiing trial?
There’s a nutritionist that shows up in my SM who is big on no shaming, normal people, science backed health things. And she was going off about an unnamed actress influencer who is clearly suffering from long term ED pushing another dysfunctional ED hack. I wasn’t sure who she was talking about until now.
Also I was skimming through comments and thought the “added arugula to my coffee” comment was from goop 😂
Far be it from me to defend this one, but it’s possible that what she meant here is that in the context of a meatball, arugula can sub for the sharp, bitter taste of aged Parmesan? Maybe? And a chopped green in a meatball makes some sense.
💯
I thought the same. I have heard of parents sneaking in spinach for the kids in meatballs, but arugula has a different taste and texture and also behaves differently when cooked. This just makes her sound like she doesn’t really cook.
I don’t know why she has to go on about replacing the dairy. I am dairy Intolerant, the whole thing (casein) So I can’t have dairy of any sort. I’ve been like that for years so I know my stuff. There are alternatives to Parmesan made commercially. I have been able to buy, even in the wilds of Canada, three different sorts.
When it comes to Parmesan in things like coating, I make my own with ground roast sunflower seeds as the base and they are absolutely delicious. The rest of my OK with dairy family love my breadcrumb chicken and have no idea what they’re eating. I could add my mix to meatballs if I wanted but I don’t normally. I don’t have breadcrumbs because I’m also gluten intolerant.
There’s no way I would use any recipe endorsed by this woman as she does not look healthy.
I’m getting flashbacks to Gisele announcing how her kids consider broccoli a desert.😉😉
Or Posh Spice and her watermelon cake.
Egg yolk cured in salt can be grated and used as a Parmesan type topping. Soy cheese substitutes can widely be found.
I have never felt ragey towards Gwen just eye rolly. Sure she’s completely out of touch but we’ve never heard of a coworker calling her mean or nasty to work with.
I refused to drink milk as a child, my dietician aunt suggested to my mother to substitute greens, so she added collard greens and spinach to eggs, spaghetti sauce. I ended up loving collard greens with bacon… delicious.
“When I don’t have milk for my pancake mix, I just add lawn clippings.”
Perfection.
The memes have been chef’s kiss, pun intended.
Goop “shifting to AI” is meaningless
in a business sense: write content? maybe, – but if AI has it, there’s no reason to go to Goop’s site.
create recipes? Sure, see above.
provide ecommerce descriptions and SEO? maybe a bit but you still need a human to review,
answer websire “help?” sure, that’s always been a thing.
Do the enterprise software work- those are already pretty automated..
There’s almost NOTHING relevant AI-based for an ecommerce site …
And it’s just an excuse for a failing business, she’s had layoffs for years
The only sense I could make out of this is that she meant arugula is a good source of calcium like milk.