There’s this famous story about then-Prince Charles and Lady Diana Spencer’s courtship. The story goes that Queen Elizabeth II, Prince Philip and the Queen Mum were all exerting heavy pressure on Charles to marry Diana, and Charles was still dithering, unable to make the decision. So he went to the most decisive person he knew: his sister, Princess Anne, who was heavily pregnant with Zara. Allegedly, Anne had little patience for her brother’s hand-wringing and told him to just marry her and get out of her face (I’m obviously paraphrasing). Charles did just that and this cursed soap opera began in earnest. Anne wasn’t any kind of fan of Diana or the Spencer family, but at the time, she understood that her brother needed to get out of the Parker-Bowles marriage and marry some nice, appropriate woman. Crash cut to Charles and Diana’s wedding, and Anne was apparently seated next to Diana’s brother, Charles Spencer. Spencer recalled what happened when he tried to make small talk with Anne.
The Princess Royal’s famous no-nonsense attitude is admired by many, but it didn’t go down the best with Princess Diana’s brother at a royal dinner. In Earl Spencer’s new memoir, Swan Song, he describes the days leading up to Charles and Diana’s wedding, including this formal meal held at Buckingham Palace two nights before.
He knew he’d be on Princess Anne’s table and then discovered he was sitting next to her. The Earl recalls, “It transpired, to my alarm, that I was actually placed next to Anne, and when she turned my way, I asked, ‘And how did your daughter’s christening go today, Ma’am?'”
“I expected her to run away with the happy topic of her baby Zara’s baptism,” Charles alleged. “But instead, she stopped, looked at me witheringly, and asked, “Tell me, how’s a christening supposed to go?”
According to Princess Diana’s brother, who was only 17 at the time, he blushed bright red and found he didn’t have a reply to this. He ended up comparing his awkward interaction with Anne to his brother-in-law Neil making “easy conversation” with the Crown Princess of Japan about rice cultivation on the other side of the room.
Earl Spencer wrote, “It was the luck of the draw that night, whether you were placed next to a royal who was happy to make you feel small, or one that had the grace and manners to look for common ground, wherever it might be found.”
It sounds like Anne and I’m sure it happened. People always praise Anne for being so “withering” and unemotional, but really, it comes across as rude for no real reason. Just bitchy for nothing. I sort of believe that this story reflects the Windsors’ attitude towards Diana and the Spencers too – that the Spencers needed to be put in their place and not treated with any kind of familial warmth. The Windsors treated Diana and Charles’ union like what it was (to them): a business arrangement between two dynasties. Unfortunately, no one told Diana that was the arrangement.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images, ACTION PRESS/startraksphoto.com and Martin Keene/PA Images/Startraksphoto.com.
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- USA Rights Only, London, England -11/10/1991-Members of the Royal family watch the Remembrance Sunday ceremony at the Cenotaph, viewed from a Foreign Office balcony. (L-R) Princess Diana, Princess Anne, Princess Alice and Queen Elizabeth The Queen Mother. -PICTURED: Princess Diana, Princess Anne, Princess Alice and Queen Elizabeth -PHOTO by: Martin Keene/PA Images/Startraksphoto.com -startraks_PAI_29180142 Editorial – Rights Managed Image – Please contact www.startraksphoto.com for licensing fee Startraks Photo New York, NY For licensing please call 212-414-9464 or email sales@startraksphoto.com Image may not be published in any way that is or might be deemed defamatory, libelous, pornographic, or obscene. Please consult our sales department for any clarification or question you may have. Startraks Photo reserves the right to pursue unauthorized users of this image. If you violate our intellectual property you may be liable for actual damages, loss of income, and profits you derive from the use of this image, and where appropriate, the cost of collection and/or statutory damages. Featuring: Princess Diana, Princess Anne, Princess Alice and Queen Elizabeth Where: London, England, United Kingdom When: 10 Nov 1991 Credit: Martin Keene/PA Images/Startraksphoto.com **USA Rights Only**
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- Princess Anne, the Princess Royal and Andrew Parker Bowles attend Cheltenham Racecourse on Gold Cup Day.13 March 2009. Picture by /,Image: 542492570, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: WORLD RIGHTS – Fee Payable Upon Reproduction – For queries contact Photoshot – sales@photoshot.com London: +44 (0) 20 7421 6000 Florida: +1 239 689 1883 Berlin: +49 (0) 30 76 212 251, Model Release: no, Credit line: Anwar Hussein / Avalon
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- Prince Charles, Prince of Wales and Diana, Princess of Wales leave St. Paul’s Cathedral in a carriage after their wedding on 29 July 1981.,Image: 542511529, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: WORLD RIGHTS – Fee Payable Upon Reproduction – For queries contact Photoshot – sales@photoshot.com London: +44 (0) 20 7421 6000 Florida: +1 239 689 1883 Berlin: +49 (0) 30 76 212 251, Model Release: no, Credit line: Anwar Hussein / Avalon
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- Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, Prince Charles, Prince of Wales, and Princess Anne, The Princess Royal, at the Platinum Pageant on June 05, 2022 in London, England. The Platinum Jubilee of Elizabeth II is being celebrated from June 2 to June 5, 2022, in the UK and Commonwealth to mark the 70th anniversary of the accession of Queen Elizabeth II on 6 February 1952.,Image: 697194778, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: -, Model Release: no, Credit line: Anthony Harvey / Avalon
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- Uppa / Bandphoto – The Prince of Wales and Princess Anne photographed in the grounds of Sandringham, issued in connection with the forthcoming royal tour of Australia. Series of photographs taken at Sandringham House by Alex Murray of Australia and Bill Rowntree of New Zealand. Ref:B39_084806_002. Date:02.03.1970 . COMPULSORY CREDIT: UPPA/Photoshot / Bandphoto
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- USA Rights Only-London, Britain 4/13/1981 Archive Photos of a Pregnant princess Anne -PICTURED: Princess Anne with Son Peter -PHOTO by: ACTION PRESS/startraksphoto.com -Startraks_action_10126305 Editorial – Rights Managed Image – Please contact www.startraksphoto.com for licensing fee Startraks Photo New York, NY For licensing please call 212-414-9464 or email sales@startraksphoto.com Featuring: Princess Anne with Son Peter Where: London, Britain, United Kingdom When: 13 Apr 1981 Credit: ACTION PRESS/startraksphoto.com **USA Rights Only**
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- Earl Spencer, brother of Diana, Princess of Wales, meets members of the Rock Choir as they announce they will be supporting The Diana Award for a special fundraising project, at Althorp House in Northamptonshire, as the charity celebrate their 25th anniversary. Featuring: Earl Spencer Where: Althorp, United Kingdom When: 20 Sep 2024 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- Earl Spencer, brother of Diana, Princess of Wales, meets members of the Rock Choir as they announce they will be supporting The Diana Award for a special fundraising project, at Althorp House in Northamptonshire, as the charity celebrate their 25th anniversary. Featuring: Earl Spencer Where: Althorp, United Kingdom When: 20 Sep 2024 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- Earl Spencer, brother of Diana, Princess of Wales, meets members of the Rock Choir as they announce they will be supporting The Diana Award for a special fundraising project, at Althorp House in Northamptonshire, as the charity celebrate their 25th anniversary. Featuring: Earl Spencer Where: Althorp, United Kingdom When: 20 Sep 2024 Credit: PA Images/INSTARimages **NORTH AMERICA RIGHTS ONLY**
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- HRH THE PRINCESS ROYAL (HRH Princess Anne) COMPULSORY CREDIT: UPPA/Photoshot Photo PAH 185811 09.10.1969
This comments ties back to the Rhianna story that is also posted. People with money and privilege being unkind in a superficial way and people making excuses, or saying that behavior makes them super special.
Imagine if Meghan had said this?
The rich, the privileged, and those with higher social standing often seem to have one thing in common: they go out of their way to make others feel smaller, inferior, or out of place. And despite Anne showing up at countless events, her actions really reveal how little she is a champion of the people—especially for someone whose position and wealth ultimately depend on those very people.
But to treat a 17-year-old kid that way, and deliberately make sure he has a miserable dinner, is frankly disgusting. Anne relies on her reputation of being a harder worker, but she doesn’t get a free pass: no amount of appearances, public events, or carefully curated image can make that kind of behaviour look compassionate or representative of the people.
Oh this is delicious….why on earth would she tell Charles to get out of the Parker Bowels marriage?
He was so conveniently occupying that old gray mare so Anne could sneak around with her husband APB!
It was perfect, but maybe pregnancy brains/hormones/Charles personality got on her last nerve …I can see her shooing him away like a fly just to be left alone – even post partum
Right? Wasn’t Anne equally in the Parker-Bowles marriage?
APB as recently as a few years ago (like 3 or 4) represented the royal family at a funeral of some sort….and yes I believe it’s presently “ still” (present tense) involved with APB – even after Tim, who knew the deal who humbly and ever so quietly accepts status quo .
The Royals RUDE? Oh pish, posh.
Anne is a rude a*hole, like so many others in that family.
Imagine being this nasty to a 17-year-old trying to make conversation. There are no excuses. Like Charles Spencer observes, this was an issue of fundamental grace and manners.
The Windsors are not house trained. Having manners is very much about being considerate of other people – and they are brought up to be considerate only to themselves, thinking that they are at the top of every totem pole (because Britain once was an empire).
They expect other people to be polite to them but feel no obligation to be polite themselves – thus we see all of them step in it again and again.
Every once in a while, Anne’s personality comes off as badass (see: the kidnapping attempt), but I’ve never liked her. Most of the time she comes off as a rude, snobbish, b!tch.
The only laudable thing she does is put in more time “working” than most of the others.
Anne gets way too much credit. I mean, I feel sorry for her for being so physiognomically akin to the horses she rides, but exterior butt ugliness is no excuse for being unkind to anyone, much less a teenager trying to be polite at an awful dinner party.
So yeah I’ll agree with you on that. I’ve never been an Anne defender. She just seems rude to me. And likely just as classist and racist as the rest of them.
@Puff, this is one of the funniest descriptions of Anne that I’ve ever seen. 👏
Little Peter and his dome.
I mean, is anyone even questioning this story? Even the most die-hard royalist won’t deny that Anne is prickly and dismissive at best and downright rude and mean at worst.
But honestly. This dinner was part of the wedding festivities. She was the groom’s sister, a grown woman and mother. He was the bride’s brother, a literal teenager still in boarding school. It’s just plain bad manners to be so short with him when he was just trying to be polite.
The Windsors were just not raised right.
Exactly. 17-year-old males aren’t at the best stage of their lives socially — so Charles S. made an effort to find out what was going on in Anne’s life (a major event) and comment on it. He didn’t care about the christening or the baby, he was just trying to make conversation.
And wasn’t it Anne’s responsibility, as (presumably) the hostess of the table, to lead the conversation and try to include and smooth the awkwardness of a 17-year-old stranded alone at this table at this stuffy event?
He was the Viscount and heir to the Spencer dynasty — 400 years older than the Windsors — which is why he was seated with Anne, no matter what his age. Disgusting, disgraceful, pompous, incredibly rude and arrogant.
@LEMON&LIME…. EXACTLY!!! The Spencer bloodline is 400 years longer and has far more royal blood in it than the jumped-up German contingent currently holding on to the throne with their desperate fingertips.
THAT’S why they try to put the Spencers down….unsuccessfully, in Diana’s case and now her brother’s case. You go, Charles Spencer!! 💪🏻
How embarrassing that a 17-year-old boy had better manners than Anne, a grown-ass woman and mother. She’s a real piece of work.
The past few weeks have only improved my opinion of Charles Spencer. I’m actively rooting for him now.
There are so few people with the kind of platform he has who will actually tell some truths about the BRF.
And we’re supposed to believe that Anne never bullied staff. The royals are just terrible people.
Charles & Anne were raised by nannies & Philip. Anne also had the misfortune of inheriting Philip’s personality. Throw in the postpartum stuff and you get this.
Wonder if Chucky sought out the same font of wisdom concerning Frogmore? He steamed & dithered about Oprah & Spare (which “he did not read”) & whether he should banish H & M from royal property. When he finally asked Anne what to do, without really caring, maybe she told him to just shut up & do it–creating the story that it was her idea.
This reminds me of when Anne was sent on a visit to the United States, a diplomatic visit, and she made a sneering comment that of course our national bird was a scavenger. This has been a long time ago, and it left a bad taste in my mouth. I told my mom that their royalty can make disparaging remarks about our country, but we are the ones they come running to when they need help. What I would like to see is that the Sussex haters see that Charles Spencer may be making a lot of money digging up old stuff about Diana’s ill treatment, Charles and the royal’s bad manners and leave the Sussexes alone and go on another feeding frenzy. The royals could have resented the Spencers because they were and are more English than the Saxe-Coburg and Gothas, who changed their name during WWI so they would sound more English than they were.
Good point. Without us it’s possible that they would be speaking German now.
No they wouldn’t. The biggest reason for Nazi Germany’s defeat was their disastrous invasion of Russia. Without US troops victory in Europe would have taken longer and been more costly but the writing was on the wall once the Germans got bogged down in the Russian winter.
You can criticize the rudeness of the Windsors without disparaging the immense war effort that the UK undertook from 1939-45. Britain was literally the only bastion against the Nazis until 1941 – and they suffered immense loss of human lives and infrastructure during intense air bombardments. The UK and Canada provided 54 % of the land forces on D-Day and US 47%. And that is not even accounting for the free French forces that landed as well. And there were the air and naval forces from Poland and Norway – as well as Belgium, the Netherlands, Australia and NZ.
The US did not save Europe single-handedly. Until 1941 the US mainly loaned money to the UK for them to buy US weapons. Those loans were paid off in 2006! After 1941 the US became an important ally that play a huge role – but the largest ally in terms of military personel (and largest casualties) was the Soviet Union whereas the US was the largest in economic terms (and those loans were repaid).
The reason I’m giving a history lesson here is because this whole “Europe would speak German if not for us” is not only inaccurate but also a right-wing talking point to express the kind of national chauvinism that is really annoying. And as a rhetorical manouever akin to the ones that the UK media employs to embiggen the BRF. Putting someone down to look better doesn’t make you better, it just make you look petty.
I say this as someone whose father grew up under Nazi occupation, who has family members that were murdered by Nazis – and whose country was liberated by the UK.
They do speak German. Such a tired old argument. Without Pearl Harbour the USA would still sit tight and happily sell weapons to all parties. All other countries were fighting while the USA dithered. Read a history book, preferably one not written by an American. The whitewashing of history to make the USA look great is just as bad as the British “we are an empire” attitude.
Oh, you just know that that family did this stuff to Meghan on the regular. If they were so rude to their fellow “blue bloods” she didn’t stand a chance at being treated like a human being by them.
Call me callous, but this one anecdote in Spencer’s book actually cracked me up. I laughed out loud in the middle of an empty house. I didn’t read it as her putting him down, so much as her refusing to sentimentalise motherhood at the early stage when everyone else is gushing and you’re just fed up with being run off your feet & sleep-deprived. So many women are expected to smile and fawn whilst feeling wretched, I kind of revel by proxy in her rejection of that expectation. I mean, yes, to Spencer, she was impolite, but i just find her honesty bracing.
YankeeDoodles, I assume she had a nanny and other help. I doubt she was as sleep deprived or run off her feet as other mothers.
Nah, she was just being a bitch.
It’s interesting that in all these stories about Charles Spencer, the accompanying photos are old ones, with him looking heavy and puffy. He looks very different now from what I’ve seen elsewhere, quite trim and healthy looking…
I believe he has had a drinking problem in the past. Lately, he has been crediting his new wife helping him getting sober.
I understand that at one point, someone who buck the stereotypes of how a woman, particularly a Princess, should act and behave was appealing and even refreshing. Seeing a woman unapologetically be themselves and act in a manner that of their male counterparts and be praised for it was great way to subvert expectations.
So I get why Anne appeals to a lot of people.
That said, it doesn’t excuse rudeness and general bitchiness that Anne is known for. You can be blunt and despise small talk without insulting someone for it. This is not the first time Anne’s been rude, it won’t be the last and it’s about time she stopped getting praised for it.
Rich privileged white women like Anne historically have had the freedom to be rude and awful to those they consider to be their inferiors. While she might have impressed people for not behaving as a submissive femme, her attitude would have been courageous only if directed toward someone who was condescending to her from a position above her. Her meanness toward Spencer was not revolutionary in the context of her social position as a royal. I agree with you she should not get credit for it.
Harry’s return just in time for his uncle’s book publication feels a *tiny bit* like the English aristos are taking advantage of this moment to throw a few shots over the bow of a weak regime that they’ve never liked.
Agree. I’ve thought the same. Like a lot of the rota were glad someone said something, because they can’t.
I’m shocked that Princess Anne was bad at making small talk – she seems like such a warm, empathetic person. 🤣
I think one of the comments above has it exactly right – the royals care about others showing politeness (meaning: deference) to them, but they don’t actually have people skills. Why would Anne, or any of the Windsors, ever worry about putting someone else at ease?
And then her daughter Zara went around and gave the exact same smarmy bitchy attitude at Meghan’s wedding. Bunch of assholes.
she just a biatch with her fake medals