Say what you will about Tiffany Haddish, she did a great job filling in for Jimmy Kimmel last week. Tiffany loves to gossip, she gets people to open up and she’ll tell you about her life too. In an interview with Liza Colon-Zayas, Tiffany admitted that she once asked a man take an STD test off Amazon, which is relatable. I wanted to talk about Allison Janney’s interview, which was so much fun. Allison is promoting Minions and Monsters and will be on Broadway this fall with Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Ed Harris in Other Desert Cities. Allison and Tiffany dished about dating, astrology and how they both go to psychics. Allison has even used pet psychics for her dog. Here’s some of what they talked about and there’s more in the video below.

On if she’s dating:
Allison: My work life has not allowed me to date… I’ve tried to do those dating apps and when they ask you to describe something about yourself, I just don’t know what to say.

Tiffany: You need to say, ‘I’m successful,’ which is going to scare all the men so you’re going to have to lie. ‘I’m struggling, I’m hungry. I really need someone to take care of me. Hold me at night please!’ Somebody is going to show up. What are you looking for in a man?

Allison: I’m really a very shy person. Got to be really funny. Got to love dogs. If they’re not taller than me, I don’t care about that as long as they don’t care about that. They’ve got to be OK with me putting on a pair of high heels, being taller. They have got to have a good relationship to the world. They can’t be trying to find themselves. 50 and up but not too far up.

Tiffany: From my experience the best place to find men… auctions, like estate sales and things like that, jewelry and art. Also funerals. That’s where you catch them all vulnerable. All you got to do is just cook for them. Make them a casserole.

On going to psychics as a substitute for therapy
Allison: You have no idea how much money I have spent on psychics. And yet I still think it’s cheaper than therapy, in a way. This one psychic said I was going to meet the man of my dreams and have all this wild hot sex. She [called] him hot pants. [I didn’t meet him] but it got me to go out more. I said ‘I don’t want to go to that party but maybe hot pants is going to be there.’

I’ve also had one say something awful. She said ‘it’s not terrible, you’re only going to lose half of your money.’

Tiffany: Did she hit you with the ‘you have a curse on your family I have to help you get rid of this curse?’ I’m like ‘you ain’t even seen me.’ And they’re like, ‘I can tell through the phone. Spirit is telling me that you have a curse on your family. There’s a curse on you and really and you need to give me $2,000 and I can help you get rid of the curse.’ I’m like, I’m going to ask Chat GPT how to get rid of this.

Allison: I’ve even talked to pet psychics. I’m not sure about them. The one I had said ‘he doesn’t like the treats in the yellow bag. He likes the treats in the red bag.’ I had one say we met each other in another lifetime in colonial days. The dog was a horse or a cobbler or something. That stuff is a little harder for me to believe. Believe it or not.

But the psychics, you do it over the phone or in person. I just love it because it looks like magic to me.

On if any of the psychics’ predictions came true
Allison: This one psychic, I went to a hotel room, which sounds – it was fine. I had this picture of Chuck Lorre because I was developing something with him. She said ‘this man you’re going to have a very long relationship with.’ I was developing this thing [with him]. I was so excited and the thing didn’t happen.

And then two years later, Mom, the TV show came my way and that was eight years.

[From Jimmy Kimmel Live on YouTube, edited for clarity]

The example of a psychic telling her she would have a long relationship with Chuck Lorre is a stretch, but I love how self aware Allison is about going to psychics. They tell her positive stories for the most part, she gets something out of it and it’s cheaper than therapy. I would argue that she can get much more out of therapy, but I’ve also balked at the cost of that. And at the work involved, frankly. I could pay $150 for a bland session with an online therapist, or I could watch free tarot or manifestation videos on YouTube telling me I’m going to have a great week. I know this is delusional! The things the tarot readers have said, particularly the positive but not full-of-it readers like Charmed Intuition Tarot, have “come true” for me too. Like Allison’s story, it’s usually a massive stretch, and they say so many general things that they’re bound to get some hits. Confirmation bias is real.

Here’s that interview. The psychic talk is around 11:30. They talk about astrology around minute 7:00.

Jeff Bridges is so fine!
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