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We’ve already seen Christina Aguilera’s derivative desperately provocative video for “Not Myself Tonight,” a song that could be considered catchy but is more like XTina playing catch up with all the musical artists that have been at the top of the charts the past few years. The second single off Christina’s upcoming album, Bionic, has been leaked and it’s an obvious and outspoken ode to cunnilingus. In defense of her very sexual “Not Myself Tonight” video, Christina did say that she’s not an average mom and that’s ok. “I never claimed to be a cookie-cutter soccer mom. That’s all good for some people. Not for me.” Christina “not a soccer mom” Aguilera is up to her very tired bag of tricks with lyrics like “you wanna taste my woohoo.” The song also features rapper Nicki Minaj:
Have you heard Christina Aguilera‘s new song? It’s called “Woo Hoo” (“Woohoo”? “WooHoo”?), it features Nicki Minaj, and it is about cunnilingus. Have other songs been written about going down on a girl before? Beats me. This is surely a contender for the “Most Impassioned Song About Cunnilingus of the Year” award at the next Grammy Awards. Technically, the lyrics are non-explicit, but they are raunchy in the innuendo department. I wouldn’t, you know, crank it at top volume at work.
[From The Frisky]
There are tons of songs about cunnilingus. Jezebel compiled a list of 20 complete with videos just last year and there are many more they forgot – my favorite being Little Muscle by The Catherine Wheel.
Here are some of the lyrics to Woohoo:
All the boys think it’s cake
When they taste my (woohoo)
You don’t even need a plate
Just your face, ha (woohoo)
Licky, licky, yum yum (woohoo)
What a great guy (woohoo)Now kiss all my (woohoo)
All over my (woohoo)
Kiss, kiss all my (woohoo)
All over my (woohoo)
Kiss, kiss, kiss all my (woohoo)
All over my (woohoo)
[From MP3 Junkyard]
This is how “mommy expresses herself artistically” only Madonna did it first and Madonna did it better. Much like her videos for “Express Yourself” and “Human Nature,” so lamely copied by Aguilera in “Not Myself Tonight”
Written by Celebitchy
Posted in Christina Aguilera, Music
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54 Responses to “Christina Aguilera’s new ode to oral sex: desperate, dirty or both?”
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She seems to be desperately seeking fame again.
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Well, I don’t care if she isn’t the normal soccer mom- I don’t want to hear her singing about her damn “whoo hoo” or eating anything of the sorts, that is just stupid, attention-getting behavior. ugh.
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Licky, licky, yum yum?
such a meaningful and deep lyrics
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Ew.
Gross, regardless of mommy-status or not. This is just too far..
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luckily for her she has a boy
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Hmm. We ignored your desperate need for attention during the ‘Dirtty’ era, Christina. This is just pathetic and OTT. Same goes for that new video clip where you out-hooker-wear everyone on the planet.
Why not use the voice God gave you without any of these silly props and faux scandal? Natural talent needs no embellishment.
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She tries to hard be relevent. She has talent why doesn’t she try using her voice instead of these sexual gimics to sell her music.
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Song aside, I love Nicki Minaj.
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She is a fame whore in every sense of the word… get a life Christina
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yeah, thats gross. that song made me feel very uncomfortable. btw, why doesnt she wear her wedding ring?
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I think Christina’s great. Why not celebrate her sexuality and write songs about cunnilingus? I think she pays hommage to Madonna, more than copying her. And as for Madge did it better: she has infinitely less talent and less of a voice than Christina (whose voice is sensational) and she was exactly the same type of famewhore people say Christina is, if not worse. She still is today. I think it’s a funny song, even if it doesn’t quite come as close to sexy as Pink and Peaches’ song about oral sex. Let the woman be herself, it’s good to have someone out there who writes and sings about what she pleases. She’s a good role model.
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I hate her so much!
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Only old female group SWV could have pulled a song with such a subject without sounding tacky.
If i remembered the song title was ‘Downtown’ and it was more about metophores and suggestions than straight up grossness.
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Wow, I never thought that she could released a worse song than the utterly hideous “Not Myself Tonight”, but she has outdone herself this time… Such tasteful and refined lyrics, an unbelievably complex melody that truly showcases her voice and, as I can imagine, the video will be an impressive display of sophistication and class.
Apparently, Christina is hell bent on committing career suicide… Now more than ever, she looks like the desperate Madonna wannabe that everyone said that she was from the beginning.
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UGH!
Guess we can’t remember her for her great voice can we.
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I wonder how her pussy-whipped husband feels about her singing about all the boys wanting to eat her cake?
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It’s not like Lady Gaga is the queen of sophistication either. She sings about “disco sticks” and “bluffin’ with her muffin.”
I don’t understand why some people get a pass and others don’t. The list on Jezebel just goes to show that there are many songs by many different artists that touch on this subject. People have been doing it for years. Sure, it’s not a new idea but it’s also not an “owned” one either. It belongs to the world of music if anything.
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Ah, her post marriage demure phase is over. That old school album she tried and image… no mas. She’s acting up again ha, back to her siren stage I guess? Interesting to see if there will be a divorce announcement soon.. looks like she’s unhappy. Was a blind item about a singer A lister who makes her for show husband sleep in another room etc. WOnder if it is her
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I am so sick of this constant, in your face, shove it down your throat sex crap. I don’t think I’m a prude because I don’t want to be constantly hearing about how so and so does it, wants it, who they screw, how they like it, and on and on and on. Seriously, it’s overkill and is it supposed to be shocking, because it isn’t. It’s just boring and makes you look trashy when you won’t STFU about sex. Yes, we all do it, I’m sure we all enjoy it, but I do NOT have any interest in hearing about what anyone does in their bedrooms. Keep that shiat to yourself PLEASE. This means you, Xtina.
Oh, and if I was having sex with that horrifically ugly man I DEFINITELY wouldn’t be talking about it. Good lord Xtina’s husband is hideous! And her poor child looks just like him…let’s all hope he grows out of it. Poor baby.
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If she is going to sing about it at least she can make it sound appetizing. The lyrics read like some crappy jingle for “Kids Cuisine”.
Maybe she is more of a soccer-mom type than she realizes.
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I’m going to keep Back to the Basics on standby and pretend that this Bionic album never appeared.
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guess this explains her hubby’s lack-of-chin. he’s been busy scarfin’ her woo–whatever.
bored now. *eyeroll*
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Oh, and cue the “people are just afraid of a woman who is in touch with her sexuality” crap. I get the feeling that there is a large group of people who think that if they aren’t screaming at the top of their lungs about who, what, when, where, and how they have sex, they just aren’t sexual people.
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–barf–She should let Kesha do the porn-o songs, and try to write something meaningful. She has a nice voice . . . too bad.
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Anna, I am with you 100%. Heaven forbid a woman sings a song about oral sex and loving her va-jay-jay. I think the song is fun and catchy-it does what it’s supposed to do. And for the life of me I cannot think why Xtina gets so much sh*t about her image or her music. She’s upfront about her sexuality and she doesn’t hide from it because she’s (gasp) a mother. If Gaga or Beyonce came out with this song the same people criticizing would be saying how great it is.
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I’m tired of the overpr0ned subjects as well.
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Both desperate and dirty.
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I dunno. I think people are being a bit hard on her. Is it a good song? No. Is it original in any way? No. Is it kind of desperate and sad that a woman with such amazing talent feels the need to use such a tired ploy for attention? Oh yes, yes, yes. However, I would rather hear a song about a woman seeking her own pleasure than doing anything and everything to please a man. There are lots and lots of songs about that. At least she’s empowered enough to say what she wants.
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@onyx have you seen her husband? I think he’s just happy to be getting any at all. I don’t know what to think of christina these days. I used to love her. But, she’s beginning acquire the whiff of desperation that most fading stars begin to exhibit (Jennifer Lopez,Madonna,etc.)when they are desperate for attention and relevancy. I’m not interested in hearing about her woohoo,weehee,wombat,wingwam,wampow,whipshaw,or whatever she’s calling her vagina these days. Everything she is doing now has been done before and better. Xtina is boring me.
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Bee, that’s what Xtina needs in her song – all your descriptive words and terms. That would turn her lame song into a true masterpiece. Her could Xtina and her handlers missed all these terms. Great post.
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she didn’t spend a whole minute writing these lyrics, did she?
so nowadays this is all it takes? a little straightforward lame talk like “look how sexy I am”. And well, usually the truth is sooo opposite (in my country we say that “a cow which moos a lot, gives little milk’
)
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She’ll never come close to Peaches, if she’s going for the OTT sex lyrics. Never. And she’ll never be authentic, just a researched, marketed, overly made-up woman. Voice is technically great, but there’s just so much more to being a pop star than that.
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She is repulsive, disgusting and horrible creature who looks like a drag queen and makes me want to vomit.
People all over the world are getting laid but do not feel the need to sing about it.
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@Jover thanks! At this point a song of Christina making random sounds would be more interesting than the dreck she’s releasing.
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lol, this song is just annoying…
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The song is just dirty.It’s nothing too important.
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It’s just…YAWN…
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Why does she always act so desperate for attention? She has a good voice.
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Maybe Im just getting old at 25, but that song is fucking annoying.
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I would have thought this album would have been more of a tribute to her son, considering she is recently a mother…more pure, more “cleaned up.” I liked how M did Ray of Light for Lola. I was expecting a different Christina, better ballads and lyrics out of this album. I don’t think she’s talking about Bratman either in these songs, she could be rebelling out of that whole marriage thing, then I might be wrong. Sure, he’s no Brad Pitt, but as long as he’s good to her, that’s what should matter. Who knows what their relationship level is at now, nobody’s perfect. I just hope she doesn’t move on because she let the fame get to her and get cocky about it.
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Xtina actually has a voice, which is unusual. I wish she would use it for good instead of evil. She has done a few power ballads in the past that are untouchable.
Just hearing about this song and seeing the picture of her husband makes me throw up in my mouth.
Has anybody heard the un-edited Miley? I can’t even think of a word for how bad her “singing” is. The girl is truly delusional – but makes bank anyway.
Betty White on SNL was such a pleasure because she is a class act who dates back to a time when you actually needed talent and professionalism to make it. Xtina has the talent but no class.
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Horrible toy music for toy people.
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Tacky.
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Whitney Houston: Great voice , but ruined it with drugs
Mariah Carey: Great voice, but is not making decent albums lately( too much drinking perhaps?)
Cristina Aguilera: great voice, but if she continues to put out crap songs she will soon be forgotten(actually she has been away so long I think she has been forgotten!)
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WOO-HOO=EPIC FAILURE
Along with Cameron Diaz, I coined them The “lost Latina’s” files. All the talent she has, that voice….I cannot even fathom words for this kind of pluckery of a mess.
This is a failed attempt of a “Pokerface” knockoff…ever since Katy Perry’s : “Kissed a Girl”, there has been an subutle undercurrent of females exploiting bi-sexualism ( Even with Nicki Minaj, Videophone & Gaga-Beyonce, Rihanna and others) for whorefamedom.
XTina is married with a child, Beyonce, Gaga and Perry are not. They can play the sex game. It is not funny allowing your child to grow up in this day in age and somewhere in their lifetime they are going to see this ish!!!!
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do we really need a song about cunnilingus to show how edgy cool and definitely not a boring stay-at-home mom we are? i don’t think so. this smacks of desperation. not one person i know thinks that Xtina needs to sell herself so short with a voice like hers. But i am assuming that the cynical record company is telling her that she needs to do this song and that video to have any kind of profile again. Then again maybe i am wrong and she really does believe the message she is pushing. Plus, i don’t like the way she said that about cookie cutter moms – so what – you are one or the other? either a cookie cutter mom, or a flaunting your ass in an explicit pop video mom. there is nothing in between and mothers are not sexy or capable of being sexy at all! pretty short-sighted and alienating quite a lot of your fan based too.
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Of all the pop starlets that came out of the late 90s-early 00s, Xtina was the one with the true talent. It has just felt like she has been opposite of Madonna, instead of remaking herself, she always has just felt like she couldn’t find her true artist self. I like her singing voice so much, but all her alter egos have seemed desperate to me.
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Meh…the song doesn’t bother me, I second the sentiment
Her HAIR however…now that is tragic! Bleach much??
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You know and she thinks she is on a campaign to empower and liberate women, I bet.
Thing is, she might be too caught up in her own dream or desire to be that iconic or empowering female artist, to realize that her approach will not bring her to that status.
On top of that, we dont need any more female singers beating the sex horse to death, or really empowering us at all- as many other posters have complained. Sex overkill. This has been done already, no news here, move on and develop the substance and find the core of what we have been empowered to possess openly.
Theres mroe to being a woman than enjoying sex, than being a mother, than having a job, than being strong— theres endless facets to female and the sex part is just a commercially competitive thing at this point. And theres more to art and artistry than that rubbish collection of noises and words called her new “song”. I wouldnt call what she did music.
Yeah I used to kinda like her too— seems like lately shes gotten to her own head and then lost it.
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fame whooreeeeeeeeeeee
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you know yes i do think she is desperate, but this song does not bother me so much as i hear a lot of awful tracks from 50 cent and pitbull about this crap and no one goes on at them about it so i’m not gonna chastize her for this either. no fan of double standards you see.
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lol wow@nnn…you took me bac with that classic..bout to go find my old SWV tape
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is she like..having an existential crisis?
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Yes I agree with Anna its great that Christina feels confident enough with her body and sexuality to sing about it and show it off and the song is funny and cathy and lets face it thier are far more ruder songs out thier then this remember sex on the beach anybody? O thats right you have all conveniently forgotten about it right. And besides this song doesnt’ outright talk about sex. I dont’ understand either why Christina gets so much crap she isnt’ the only sexaul female popstar in the world Remeber Madonnas sex book anyone? That was far more crude then anything in this song or her videos for that matter. If you people cant handle adultsexaulty then dont’ watch or listen to Christina its that flipping easy ok jeez?
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