Beyonce and Jay-Z have shared photos of their adorable one month old daughter, Blue Ivy Carter. The photos were posted on Jay Z’s website, Life and Times, along with a new Tumblr site made just for the occasion, Hello Blue Ivy Carter. They included photos of both Jay and Beyonce holding their beautiful baby along with a handwritten note asking for privacy. The note says:

“We welcome you to share in our joy. Thank you for respecting our privacy during this beautiful time in our lives. – The Carter Family.”

It’s nice to see a celebrity couple releasing baby photos online instead of opting for a magazine spread. My first impression is that this baby is very sweet and looks a lot like her dad. I don’t see much Beyonce in her and I’ll leave it at that. Only time will tell and some babies look significantly different within a few short months.

Beyonce just made her first post-baby appearance at an event at Carnegie hall where Jay-Z performed. Her nails were painted blue in honor of Blue Ivy. Beyonce looked incredible for a woman who had just had a baby a month prior. She reportedly achieved such fast weight loss through two two-hour workouts each day and a strict diet of “six tiny high protein meals a day.”

Congratulations to Beyonce and Jay-Z on their new arrival! They look elated and that baby is precious.

Have you heard the latest Blue Ivy Carter news? That baby is barely a month old, and she’s already The Most Important Baby Ever. Don’t believe me? Blue Ivy Carter is an official brand now. Beyonce and Jay-Z have filed paperwork (which is being rushed) to trademark BIC. For reals.

She’s just a month old, but Blue Ivy Carter is already a household name — and her world-famous parents Beyonce and Jay-Z aim to protect it.

Rolling Stone reports that the new mom, 30, and dad, 43, filed an application with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office to protect their daughter’s name; the music superstars intend to use Blue Ivy as a potential brand name for a line of baby products, including carriages, diaper bags and baby cosmetics.

The application (made through Beyonce’s company BGK Trademark Holdings) is pending, but is expected to be approved.

The “Love on Top” singer and “Empire State of Mind” rapper’s move comes after two competing trademark applications emerged following Blue Ivy’s Jan. 7 birth. Fashion designer Joseph Mbeh tried to trademark “Blue Ivy Carter IV” on Jan. 11; another applicant tried to claim the name “Blue Ivy Carter Glory IV” for a line of fragrances. Both applications were denied.

[From Us Weekly]

And there’s the answer to several blind items – didn’t everyone say that Beyonce and Jay were going to use the pregnancy and the baby to extend their multiple business interests? Now, although I think this is the height of TACKY, I understand the reasoning behind trying to protect the baby’s name so that it’s not used for perfumes and such without a parent’s permission. Here’s a question I have, though – if (when) the trademark comes through and Bey and Jay then use “BIC” to brand a multitude of crap, won’t all of the profits have to go to BIC?

In other Beyonce news, Star Magazine has a fascinating story about how Beyonce has gotten and will continue to “get back” her figure. Hint: it’s harder than “just removing the pillow.”

Beyonce is getting back to bootylicious! After giving birth to baby girl Blue Ivy Carter on Jan. 7, Beyonce is determined to drop 40 lbs. of baby weight she packed on during her pregnancy – and she hopes to do it in just four week of boot camp!

Trainer Marco Borges has moved into her and Jay-Z’s Hamptons home to put the new mom through intense daily sweat sessions.

“Beyonce and Marco are up at 5 a.m. for a two-hour workout, and they do it again at 5 p.m.,” says a source. “They do a mix of cardio, Pilates, plyometrics, yoga and of course dance.”

Beyonce is sticking to a strict diet too. “She’s having six tiny high-protein meals a day,” reveals the source. “She’s living on protein shakes, egg-white omelettes, pineapple chunks and lots of ice-cold water.”

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

Pineapple chunks? A live-in trainer? Two workouts a day? All while breastfeeding? Damn, Bey. Someone sure wants us to believe that baby weight was definitely gained. Personally, I still don’t see it. Beyonce looks slightly heavier, but not by much.

Photos courtesy of WENN & Beyonce Online.

“HOW GAUCHE.” – Dame Gwyneth

FINALLY. We finally get to hear about the baby gift Gwyneth Paltrow sent to her BFF Beyonce. I’ve been waiting for this! And I’m a little bit disappointed. Considering Blue Ivy Carter already has diamond earrings, a platinum bracelet, a sapphire-encrusted baby bottle and SIX NANNIES, I was expecting Blue’s mother’s best friend to really deliver something so spectacular, it would have put all of the peasantry to shame. Unfortunately, Gwyneth gave a gift that seems almost… normal. It’s really expensive, of course, but it’s also practical.

What kind of stroller did Beyonce get from pal Gwyneth Paltrow? A Bugaboo, naturally!

Paltrow was among the very first to tweet about the birth of her BFF Beyonce’s daughter Blue Ivy in early January — and the actress, 38, knew just what to gift the chanteuse and her bundle of joy.

Paltrow treated Beyonce and husband Jay-Z to an all-black Cameleon stroller by Bugaboo; the posh baby-transporter retails for $880. (As it happens, Beyonce, 30, scored one of many smash singles with Destiny’s Child in 1999 with the song “Bugaboo,” about a male suitor who just doesn’t know when to give up.)

Before Blue Ivy’s birth, Beyonce (who made her first post-baby appearance Monday and Tuesday in NYC) snapped up a $3500 NurseryWorks VETRO Lucite crib in NYC for her little one, born at 7 lbs Jan. 7 at Lenox Hill Hospital.

Blue’s crib and Bugaboo will fit right in with her extravagant nursery — a 2,200 square-foot space recently built in the superstar family’s Tribeca apartment.

[From Us Weekly]

Maybe Bey and Jay just like stuff in all black – I think all of their cars and SUVs are black too. Anyway, I don’t have a problem with Gwyneth’s gift. I doubt it will ever be used, though. Beyonce and Jay-Z will NEVER push little Blue Ivy down the sidewalk in some peasant-y stroller. Never.

Here’s Goop and Chris Martin (in the same frame!!!!!!) having dinner with one of Gwyneth’s other BFFs/mentees, Taylor Swift, in London a few weeks ago.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

We need to talk about this, but we don’t have all of the photos. You need to GO HERE and HERE to see the new Beyonce pics. For the first time since giving birth (cough), Beyonce stepped out for a public appearance. She was supporting her husband’s charitable work – Jay-Z and Bey were at Carnegie Hall for the first of two shows that Jay performed for to benefit the United Way of New York City and The Shawn Carter Scholarship Foundation. Bey wore red Alice Temperley and she looked… interesting. Little Blue Ivy was born just a few days short of a month ago, and Bey already has her figure back, of course. We can argue about whether her hips are bigger or whether she’s always had those hips, but can we all agree that Beyonce’s “post-pregnancy weight loss” has been spectacular? I mean… really? Here’s one photo from her outing:

During the Carnegie Hall show, Jay dedicated a version of “Glory” to Blue Ivy, telling the audience, “Put a hand in the air for Blue!” After the Carnegie Hall show, Bey and Jay went to his 40/40 club, where they partied for hours. Jay was also at the club for the Super Bowl too, although Bey didn’t join him. Page Six reports that Jay “was spotted in a main floor booth, in plain view of the hundreds who packed the luxe sports bar’s every cranny. Yankees hurler CC Sabathia and the Knicks’ Carmelo Anthony appeared from a private viewing room upstairs to join Jay at his table. After the Giants prevailed, the crowd sang ‘Empire State of Mind’ in celebration.”

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and Beyonce Online.

Beyonce and Jay-Z have gone quiet for the most part since the birth of little Blue Ivy. I mean, they released a statement and Jay released a song, and he also partied all night at a club opening, but other than that… relatively quiet. What does this selective silence mean? Does it mean that they are quietly enjoying the first months of little Blue’s life? Or does it mean that something big is coming – like some kind of craziness for the Grammys? I don’t know. But I do tend to believe this In Touch Weekly report, just because I don’t have a reason to disbelieve it:

Beyonce isn’t leaving anything to chance when it comes to the welfare of her firthborn child. According to a friend, the new mom has two nannies on call at all times, which makes for a total of six nannies for little Blue Ivy Carter.

“Beyonce wanted to make sure that her daughter has the best of care,” a friend of the singer tells In Touch. “Her diaper is changed every hour.”

And proud papa Jay-Z, 42, is also lavishing attention on the newborn – by way of bling.

“Jay-Z bought her diamond earrings and a platinum baby bracelet,” reveals the friend. “Even her bottle has pink sapphires on it.”

A little over the top perhaps, but what can you expect from the couple who reportedly spent $1.3 million to bullet-proof the delivery room!

[From In Touch Weekly, print edition]

“Her diaper is changed every hour” – not “Beyonce changes her diaper.” But isn’t that weird – is that a thing? Changing a baby’s diaper hourly instead of just waiting for a more occasion-appropriate time to change the kid’s diaper? As for the all of blinged-out baby stuff – babies just shove everything into their mouths, right? And that’s why you don’t give them jewelry and stuff? Those six nannies better keep an eye on things, but Blue’s parents are idiots.

By the way, these are all photos from Beyonce’s (phantom, pillowy) pregnancy – various pics from July to September of last year, which was Bey’s second trimester. The one where Bey is in black – that’s from Glastonbury, where Gwyneth Paltrow claims Bey was “barfing” in between songs because of morning sickness. Hm…

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

We have some assorted Beyonce news today, which makes me happy. Nothing makes me feel less sickly than thinking about the avalanche of lies that Beyonce has surrounded herself with, and where she goes from here. Radar and Media Takeout are reporting that Bey and Jay-Z have decided on little Blue Ivy’s godmother – and no, it’s not Rihanna. It’s not Solange. It’s not Kelly Rowland. And it’s not even Gwyneth Paltrow. According to these sources, Bey and Jay want Oprah to be Blue Ivy’s spiritual guardian! OPRAH.

Though her daddy’s got 99 problems, Blue Ivy’s led a charmed life so far.

And as if the newborn daughter of Beyonce and Jay-Z didn’t have enough going for her come Christmas time, word has it that she’s about to get a golden godmother: talk show icon Oprah Winfrey.

Mediatakeout.com reports the A-list couple have chosen the legendary media figure as Blue’s godmother, as they’ve grown close to her.

Jay-Z’s pal, Tyran “Ty Ty” Smith, is Blue’s godfather, the website reports, noting the power couple wanted to make sure their godparents weren’t blood-related.

The 30-year-old Dreamgirls stunner — checked in under the name “Ingrid Jackson” — delivered the child via Cesarean section earlier this month at Manhattan’s Lenox Hill Hospital, where she and the hubby doled out $1.3 million for use of the facility’s fourth floor.

[From Radar]

Ha, Radar is still sticking with the “Beyonce had a C-section” story even though she claimed Blue Ivy was delivered naturally. As for the Oprah stuff – sure. I could see that. I could also see Kanye West being named the Godfather. What would it be like for little Blue Ivy to have Oprah and Kanye as godparents?

In other Beyonce news, In Touch Weekly reports this week that Bey “hates her body right now,” so she’s decided to do the “Master Cleanse” once again. The Master Cleanse is the liquid diet (which Gwyneth is always recommending) which involves “a mixture of water, maple syrup, lemon juice and cayenne pepper for at least ten days. Laxatives, either via pill or a salt water flush, are also part of the program.” Do you really believe that Bey would go on The Master Cleanse less than a month after giving birth (naturally!)? Wouldn’t it be easier for her to just take off the pillow?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

This is a just-released image from the photo shoot for Beyonce’s 4 album artwork. And what an art project it is, eh? This one image has already scored yet another round of “Beyonce systematically lightens her skin in post-production” complaints. One of the first times this happened was back in 2008, and was probably not even Bey’s fault – it was an ad for L’Oreal, so the company probably decided to lighten Beyonce’s skin color. But since then, Bey has been criticized several more times. I noted back when he discussed the original art work for 4 and the first video from the album – Beyonce’s weave was especially blonde, and her skin looked really, really pale in those photos.

She faced controversy back in 2008 when her skin appeared shades lighter in an advertisement. But it appears Beyoncé – or her producers – have not learned their lesson. A promotional picture has emerged of the pop princess looking much paler than her usual colour.

The new photo, taken before the 30-year-old fell pregnant with her newborn daughter, are being used to re-advertise her fourth album, 4, which was released last year.

In the seductive pose, Beyoncé dons a blonde wig and lies on a leopard-print couch, wearing a skimpy black crochet monokini. She also wears suspenders and a lashing of dark red lipstick. Experts told The Sun the appearance may have been down to lighting used in the studio. However this is not the first time the wife of rapper Jay-Z has accused of appearing to ‘lighten’ her skin.’

It has been alleged that in the early days of award-winning band Destiny’s Child her father Mathew Knowles had persuaded her to use skin treatments to remain the lightest-complexioned member of the successful girl group. And some commentators have expressed fears, that these images of the superstar singer – who is famous for her honey-toned hair and complexion, could have the effect of making darker-skinned black girls ashamed of how they look.

In August 2008, cosmetics giant L’Oreal was accused of ‘whitewashing’ the star in an advert by digitally lightening her skin. And last February, a very blonde Beyonce stepped out, wearing a black minidress which revealed unusually pale skin on the star.

At the time writer Yasmin Alibhai-Brown accused the singer of ‘betraying all Black and Asian women.’ She wrote in The Daily Mail: ‘Too many black and Asian children grow up understanding the sad truth that to have dark skin is to be somehow inferior. Of course, black and Asian parents work hard to give their children a positive self-image and confidence in their appearance, despite the cultural forces stacked against them. But when black celebrities appear to deny their heritage by trying to make themselves look white, I despair for the youngsters who see those images.’

At the time, the cosmetics house denied that the pictures had been altered in such a way but The New York Post newspaper called the advert ‘shocking’ and accused it of making the singer look like a ‘weird, nearly white version of herself’.

She has not commented on the photos.

[From The Mail]

Yes, the whole “lighter is better” complex is felt in the Asian communities too – Freida Pinto spoke about the fixation with lighter skin amongst Indian women last year too. My thought? If it was an odd advertisement where Bey may or may not have had control over, I would think the controversy should not fall at Beyonce’s feet. But this has been happening with Beyonce for YEARS. In promotional images, in magazine photo shoots, in advertising, her skin is almost always lighter than it is in “candid” photos. Sometimes, there really is a conspiracy. And I don’t understand why Beyonce is still so obsessed with putting herself out there like a blonde white woman. For why?

Photos courtesy of WENN, Beyonce Online.

Personally, I like the word “bitch.” I think most women feel the word has been reclaimed from “something derogatory men would say about women” to “something women say about themselves, a word that denotes fierceness and awesomeness.” I’m a bitch. And you probably are too, especially since you’re on a site called Celebitchy. Now, just because “bitch” has been “reclaimed” doesn’t mean that the old, derogatory “bitch” name-calling still doesn’t happen. Frequently. For example, rap lyrics are full of misogyny (and homophobia, and racism, and everything else). But from here on out, Jay-Z wants us to know that we are no longer bitches to him. Now that he has a daughter, he will never use the word “bitch.” He wrote a poem about it. For real.

Jay-Z has vowed to drop the word “bitch” from his lyrics after the birth of his daughter Blue Ivy Carter.

The rapper, who celebrated the birth of his first child with wife Beyonce earlier this month, has released a poem dedicated to his daughter in which he promises never to drop the word “bitch” again.

In the poem, the rapper writes: “Before I got in the game, made a change, and got rich/I didn’t think hard about using the word bitch/I rapped, I flipped it, I sold it, I lived it/Now with my daughter in this world I curse those that give it”.

He also goes on to swear he will protect her and that the “degradation has passed”. He writes: “No man will degrade her, or call her name. I’m so focused on your future, the degradation has passed. I wish you wealth, health and insight. Forever young you may pass. Blue Ivy Carter, my angel”.

Blue Ivy Carter became the youngest person ever to be credited on the US Billboard chart last week.

Jay-Z released a new track earlier this week which is titled ‘Glory’ and is dedicated to his daughter. The track features her coos and cries, for which she is officially credited and entered the Billboard Chart at Number 74, the highest new entry on the chart this week.

[From NME]

It’s interesting that it took the birth of his daughter to change Jay’s bitch-calling ways and not his marriage to Beyonce. Married to Bey? Women are still bitches. Fathering a daughter? NO MORE BITCHES. Whatever, I don’t really care. I’m too old to be prickled by insensitive rap lyrics, so it doesn’t make any difference to me. Of course, I’m currently on a mission to reclaim the C-bomb. I’m totally a C-bomb too.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

I don’t really want to talk about the scandals and conspiracies involved with Beyonce’s (real or alleged) delivery of baby Blue Ivy at Lenox Hill Hospital. And yet… there are still tons of stories, and the scandal keeps growing by the day. After reports of multiple “peasant” parents being denied access to the prenatal unit at Lenox Hill – and denied access to their own newborn children while Beyonce and Jay were in the house – reports now indicate that the situation around baby Blue’s birth is being investigated by the New York City Health Department. (UPDATE: TMZ reports that the investigation is over? O RLY?) Plus, the hospital is conducted their own in-house review of everything that went down. What will they find? Will they find that Beyonce and Jay spread around more than $1 million within the hospital to keep everyone quiet? Or will they find that Bey and Jay shelled out a large chunk of change for a temporary remodel of eight hospital rooms? That’s what Us Weekly claims:

Sweet suites! To prep for the birth of their daughter Blue Ivy, Beyonce and Jay-Z didn’t just build a deluxe nursery at their Tribeca home — they had two private, over-the-top suites built at NYCs Lenox Hill Hospital for the express purpose of Blue’s arrival.

“A month ago, [workers] tore down 6-8 rooms and turned them into 2 suites,” a Lenox Hill Hospital source tells Us Weekly. Beyonce, 30, and husband Jay-Z, 42, “paid to have it constructed just for them.”

Featuring “mahogany walls” and other posh accents, the “amazing” suites sat empty for about a month until Blue Ivy’s Jan. 7 birth. “You’d want to live in there!” the hospital source gushes.

Officials for the hospital shot down rumors that the superstar couple caused turmoil at the hospital — and that some patients and families were temporarily denied access to the NICU to accommodate the VIPs on the premises.

No word yet on what’s to become of the suites now that Beyonce and Blue have departed.

Now that little Blue Ivy is at home at her parents’ palatial Tribeca home, she’ll kick back a $3,5000 NurseryWorks VETRO Lucite crib.

[From Us Weekly]

Dear God. How f–king wasteful! They tore apart six to eight perfectly adequate rooms so that Blue Ivy could enter the world in her own VIP suite? And no one was allowed in there for a month? How does the hospital justify this kind of thing to its board? If it was just about sprucing up an existing suite or something, it would be a meh story. But taken with the stories of Bey and Jay’s complete disregard for all of the “peasants” in the hospital, and now the idea that part of the prenatal wing was under construction just for THE BIRTH OF A PILLOW, the whole thing is just insane. TMZ has photos of the VIP birthing suite that Bey and Jay had constructed – you can see it here. TMZ says it includes “4 flat screen TV’s, state of the art electronics, a kitchenette, nice art, mahogany walls and plush furnishings.” Sources tell TMZ, “the suite was not constructed specifically for Beyonce, but it was always intended that Beyonce would be the first patient to use it.” WTF?

Anyway, there are even more Blue Ivy stories. She’s already the biggest little princess ever. Even the eventual child of Duchess Kate and Prince William will not roll in the kind of luxury that Blue Ivy is getting. This is what has been allegedly stacked up for Blue – the list is worth more than $1.5 million, and includes:

*A “fantasy” crib fit for Cinderella – a coach-like crib from PoshTots, for which her her parents paid nearly $20,000.

*A solid-gold, handmade horse from Japanese jeweler Ginza Tanaka that Jay-Z bought for $600,000. (This has been denied in some outlets.)

*A $15,000 highchair dripping with Swarovski crystals.

*A $285 Jean-Paul Gaultier dress.

*A $30,000 windmill playhouse.

*A trunk full of children’s books, a present from Oprah.

[Via The NY Post & The NYDN]

I can’t even. You know she’s just going to be pooping, sleeping and nursing for the first three months or so, right?

These are all photos from a trip Bey and Jay took to Paris in late April of last year. Bey would have been almost two months along in her pregnancy. Maybe that was why her face looked so jacked?

Photos courtesy of Fame.

There are about 20 million stories regarding Beyonce, Jay-Z and little Blue Ivy, who was born on Saturday at Lenox Hill Hospital. Allegedly. For convenience, I’m just going to do all of the new stories in bullet points.

*A new (peasant!) father was trying to get into the neonatal intensive care unit to see his newborn, premature twins, but he was shut down by Bey and Jay’s bodyguards – they shut down the entire NICU, allegedly, by shelling out $1.3 million to Lenox Hill. The father is pissed, and some of the parents who were manhandled by Bey and Jay’s bodyguards are considering a lawsuit.

*However, the hospital denies both the “closing off the NICU” story and the “$1.3 million” story. A spokesperson for the hospital told TMZ: “The suggestion that the couple paid $1.3 million to rent an entire maternity floor is simply not true. The family is housed in an executive suite at the hospital and is being billed the standard rate for those accommodations. The family does have its own security detail on site. However, the hospital has been and continues to be in control of managing all security at the facility. We have made every effort to ensure minimal disruption to other families experiencing the births of their own children over the past three days.”

*Jay-Z already has a song about his new daughter. It’s called “Glory (feat. Blue Ivy Carter)”. Apparently, it features a clip of Blue Ivy crying just moments out of the womb (whose womb?). Jay also makes a reference to a previous miscarriage that Beyonce suffered – that no one knew about before now. Sad. Here’s the song, with the lyrics appearing in the video:

*Lastly, Bey and Jay issued a statement about the birth. According to the official story that Jay and Bey are now putting it out, there was NO C-section involved. Bey wants everyone to know that she was NOT too posh to push. I’m sure she’ll be singing about the “pain” too, right? Here’s the statement:

Hello Hello Baby Blue!

We are happy to announce the arrival of our beautiful daughter, Blue Ivy Carter, born on Saturday, January 7, 2012. Her birth was emotional and extremely peaceful, we are in heaven.

She was delivered naturally at a healthy 7 lbs and it was the best experience of both of our lives. We are thankful to everyone for all your prayers, well wishes, love and support.”

[Via Us Weekly]

Do you believe her? Do you believe any of this? Do you believe that Beyonce was really and truly pregnant all of this time, that her magical bump kept going up and down in size on its own, and that she carried to full-term (while flying all over North America) and she went into labor and that she delivered naturally and vaginally? SERIOUSLY?!?!?!!? Granted, I feel bad now that I know Bey and Jay had gone through a miscarriage before… but I honestly think that piece of information can be used for the surrogacy case. Maybe Bey really did have problems conceiving and/or carrying to term, thus, they used a surrogate. I don’t know. But I find the initial reports of a “scheduled C-section” versus “Oh, no, I had a natural birth!” contradiction to be just another in a long line of suspicious activities. Maybe Bey just decided “In for a penny, in for a pound.” She’s lied about so much, why not make up a fake natural birth?

Beyonce when she was seven months pregnant:

Photos courtesy of Fame.