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The NY Daily News reports on a new study in the Journal of Family Psychology that shows that couples are happier and more satisfied in their marriages when the man is less attractive than the woman. This could be partially due to the fact that men, the ones who are traditionally more likely to cheat, are less interested in other women when their wives are hot.
“Both spouses tended to behave more positively when wives were more attractive than their husbands and more negatively when husbands were more attractive than their wives,” said the study by UCLA’s Benjamin Karney.
Karney also found that it doesn’t matter how much better looking the wife is than the husband - just that there is a discrepancy.
From Marilyn Monroe and Arthur Miller to Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony, beautiful women have been marrying less attractive men through the ages.
Consider Howard Stern and his fiancée, Beth Ostrosky; Christina Aguilera and her geeky husband, Jordan Bratman, or Sienna Miller’s latest fling with homely actor Rhys Ifans.
According to the study, it is evolution that dictates that physical attractiveness of long-term mates is more important to men than to women.
Men are looking for a way to carry on their genes and see physical attractiveness as an indicator of strong genetics.
“Because physical attractiveness is less important to women, in contrast, relative attractiveness may only affect them through its effect on their husbands,” the study says.
[From The NY Daily News]
This is interesting, because I thought I learned in psychology class that couples who were matched in levels of attractiveness were the ones who lasted. This story made me think of Cate Blanchett’s husband and I feel bad for using them as an example, but they’re the first ones who came to mind. Cate, 38, has been married to screenwriter and playwright Andrew Upton, 41, for just over 10 years and they are expecting their third child together next month. Cate is one of Hollywood’s most beautiful actresses and her husband looks refreshingly plain.
The Daily News quotes people explaining the ugly guy = happy marriage phenomenon by saying that “When a woman looks better in a relationship she feels like she has nothing to worry about,” and “the men try harder so it makes for a better marriage.”
And I thought it had more to do with shared interests and communication. It would seem to help if the less attractive man was incredibly rich and kind too.
Christina Aguilera and Jordan Bratman are shown on 9/29/07. Cate Blanchett and Andrew Upton are shown on 11/4/07 and 6/14/07, thanks to Splash News.
Written by Celebitchy
Posted in Cate Blanchett, Christina Aguilera, Psychology
24 Responses to “Less attractive men make for happier marriages”
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If a man or a woman can cheat then they are going to cheat no matter what. It depends on what kind of person they are.
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I call B.S. Every man knows there are only 3 tried and true rules to a successful marriage:
1. Keep it in your pants.
2. No matter how much you disagree, her mother is always wrong (and most likely being a bitch).
3. On the rare occasion that you’re right about something, keep the victory dance to a maximum of three minutes.It’s really not that hard when you break it down.
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Sadly,I have to disagree. Guys (not all, just alot) are insane, to them, they are a catch because they have a dick. That is their prize posession, no matter what they look like.
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A bit of a half-baked study, that. There are always going to be relationships out there that prove the exception.
If they’d said instead that an ordinary looking man, who’s also kind, generous, confident and funny, is more likely to have a happy long-term union with a more attractive woman, then I’d agree. Kind, generous and funny is always going to be an attractive prospect for most women.What’s the betting Andrew Upton is all those things.
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I think this proves that women who marry men that they choose based on something other than their looks have happier marriages. Big shocker, that.
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cate blanchett DOES look like heidi montag in the last pic. i did a double-take!
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Exactly, peachfish. Well put. And you didn’t even need to do a study on it.
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Maybe if the guy isnt all hung up on himself and his supposed ‘hotness’ then he has more emotions and atention he can give ot his wife, which, in turn make for a very happy relationship.
Also this can deter him from cheating if just a bit- it wont be as ‘easy’ for a homely guy to catch a bunch of other women while married.
But yea- the major premise here is that the woman is in love with the guy for who he is on the inside, not what hes got on the outside.
If he is a guy with good values and character (but not necessarily looks)and that is why she loves him, well then yes, their relationship will be healthier simply for the fact that its based on people with values and character. There are also men with good value and charcter that are concurrently very attractive. It is I suppose, very difficult for a man to not be swayed by his own endowments, though, just like it is for ravishing women… the way people are so “easy” nowadays that really isnt a surprise.
Okay where am I going with this. LOL -
This is new? The southern woman who helped raise me told me 2 things concerning men that have held true all my life -
1. Date men who are grateful to have you, meaning, they are thrilled to be with a woman they consider better than themselves. They will do more to keep you. Explicitly, never get attached to the hot handsome devils. Their wives are often miserable.
2. never EVER advertise your man…even to your best girlfriends.
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well halle berry was way hotter than her husband, eric benet(?), and he still cheated on her.
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ha! plot, you nailed it.
Marry somebody who adores the ground you walk on, with whom you hold in as high esteem. I did, and while he’s not as “hot” as my broke, jealous, philandering, insecure first husband, (I’m talkin ta you, G***y), my wonderful current husband is the most fantastic husband in the universe, and I tell everybody because I just can’t help it.
Don’t ever date anybody just on their looks. It will bring you only misery.
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Depends on the quality of the person. Of course, if you’re good-looking then you are likely to have more temptation (because more people are likely to find you attractive) but that’s it really.
Looks don’t determine whether someone will cheat or not, just who they are and what their personal ethics are.
There just aren’t any pat solutions. And for the record, ‘experts’ in their field also determined that, mathematically, Jessica Alba had the sexiest walk - so let’s take this like everything else we hear from their ilk - with industrial quantities of salt.
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Eric Benet is hardly unattractive. I don’t know what you consider attractive, but he’s handsome. Ergo, one of the reasons he probably stepped out on Halle, he has a lot of choices and options open to him.
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Or maybe less attractive men are better in bed because they’re not so busy looking at themselves in the mirror.
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I remember the Sex&The City episode where Carrie investigated to see if ugly men were better than good-looking ones. Answer is no.
In the episode. And in real life.
If you marry someone for the total attraction pack (meaning mind, conversation, charm, attitude towards ladies and in particular towards you, shared interests, etc.), then you get a better chance at a happy (not meaning ever lasting, though!) marriage.
And maybe women until the youngest generation have always been regarded to as the better looking ones. The fashion & beauty industry has almost exclusively been turned to the female target until very recently…
We have an incredible amount of clothes, make-up and hair changes to choose from.
What makes a beautiful woman after all? -
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Very good point, very good. I’ve noticed that. It’s not just “better in bed” really though, it’s that their focus is on YOU, rather than their own handsomeness/insecurity.
Lesser-looking guys, in general, have always been a whole lot nicer to me than “hunks”. More thoughtful; which translates in bed, usually.
Exceptions are probably only in the 10 percentile in my experience.
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I was directing that to Agent bedhead’s comment, btw. the quote didn’t print.
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Men are men, all no good. Handsome me tend to be stupid though. Any one agree?
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Jayne, is that you, in nashvegas?
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I’m not shocked. Two Big Reasons:
1. Women love attention. Dating a not attractive man means when they walk into a room all eyes are on the woman. Walk in with a handsome man and eyes will be on both of them. Repeat after me…women love attention.
2. An less attractive guy is more likely to put up with a woman’s overly dramatic crap. A good looking guy won’t.
And there you go. You can say it’s sexist, but it’s a facty…
And of course there are always exceptions.
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Extremely handsome men DO tend to be stupid.
Not all women crave attention. They only want to feel like the person thinks they’re special and won’t run off and nail the first thing that comes on to them.
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Ha! It’s okay, gg, I was only kidding… mostly.
Syko:
Anonymous:
Scott F:
xanax:
lulu:
heehee:
plot:
gg:
FF:
moon unit:
Bellatrix:
Jayne:
Night:
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I don’t know about this - I was more attractive than my ex, and he still nailed everything that breathed.
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