Bret Michaels on how to stay faithful: “you just don’t go all the way”

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US Weekly has an interview with musician and reality star Bret Michaels, 47, this week. Michaels confirms that he’s back with Kristi Gibson, 39, who is the mother of his two daughters Raine, 10, and Jorja, 5. He’s not engaged as has been rumored, but is recommitted to Kristi (in his way) and acknowledges that he gave her a promise ring. When Michaels describes what fidelity means to him, that’s when it starts to get funny. You can tell he’s not joking, either:

What about the rumors that you and Kristie are now engaged?
I gave her a promise ring on Christmas Day. There’s no date for a marriage, but we love and respect each other, and one day I will make an honest woman out of her. [laughs]. We’ve been on and off since the mid 90s, and the great thing about Kristi is that she never said “If you don’t marry me, I’m leaving.” She went into this relationship with her eyes wide open. When we were broken up, I did Rock of Love – which was a train wreck of a show, and probably not the best way to find true love. But that made me appreciate her even more!

How has your recent health setback changed your life?
I’m on medication for the hemorrhage [Soma, to control back and neck cramps due to irritation from the hemorrhage] and twice a day, I give myself injections of Lovenox, which thins the blood and prevents clots. And I do four daily shots of insulin, plus six finger pricks to check my blood sugar. I’ve become Bret Michaels, human pincushion [laughs]. In January, I’m going to have an operation to close the hole in my heart. The doctors know it caused my stroke, but they still don’t know what caused the hemorrhage…

Is touring the same?
The only change is that I can’t drink alcohol! And now that I’m in a relationship, I can still have a great time with women. You just don’t go all the way. The party stays in the front of the bus, not the back.

[From US Weekly, print edition, August 2, 2010]

Doesn’t it sound like Michaels is using “back of the bus” as a metaphor? How reassuring it must sound to his girlfriend that he’s still going to have a “great time” but just won’t “go all the way.” Would you put up with that explanation from your boyfriend/husband/fiance?

As for whether he’s endangering his health by touring, Michaels says that it’s helping him to live life to the fullest and have something to look forward to. “I was lying on my back and TV in a depressing ICU for 12 days! I needed to get out. Now I get to give 1,000 percent for my fans and throw great parties on the bus. Look, I fought really hard to live and I’m not going to go out on the road and do something crazy to die.” If he does die, though, Michaels has plans for a rocking funeral that he describes as a “megaparty” to include fireworks.

You can tell that Michaels isn’t letting a massive health scare or a pre-engagement slow him down. He’s still rocking and getting into trouble. Late last week, cops in northeast Indiana searched his tour bus on some vague pretense and found marijuana and other “unspecified drugs.” Michaels’ rep told People that he “allowed an open search of the buses and everything was handled in a professional manner.”

If you’re ever pulled over by police in the US, you have the right not to consent to a search of your vehicle. (Please also remember your right to remain silent when questioned.) I’m repeating this because when researching Michaels’ response to police I found a lot of important information.

Bret Michaels, Kristi Lynn Gibson and their daughters Raine Elizabeth Sychak and Jorja Bleu Sychak are shown outside their hotel in NY on 7/13/10. Credit: Fame Pictures. Last two photos below are from 7/12/10 outside the Late Show. Credit: JDH/JCP/WENN.com

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47 Responses to “Bret Michaels on how to stay faithful: “you just don’t go all the way””

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  1. LindaR says:

    Oh, good for him. He has obviously attended the Bill Clinton school of sex education at which it is taught that only intercourse is sex just playtime for grownups.

    I wonder if he will lose the wig and kerchief when his hair has grown back in a couple of inches.

  2. Shay says:

    I don’t care if this dude was just in hospital, he is the male equivalent of a bimbo and a moron to boot.

  3. Kali says:

    What’s wrong with cooperating with the police? Most police officers are not out to harass people by pulling them over or arresting them. Cops are usually reasonable people just trying to do their jobs. There are some horrible stories about police abusing their rights. There are also great stories about police finding criminals because they pulled someone over – that’s how Ted Bundy was caught.

    As for Bret Michaels – he’s the classic aging rocker. He found a woman who will put up with his antics. I don’t get why she’d want to have kids with a man who treats her like that.

  4. OXA says:

    Do I some of Brittney’s old hair on his head?

  5. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    I don’t think Bret meant he does other things with women sexually. I mean come on, isn’t everyone at the front of the bus? I think he means he can still party with women, get lap dances maybe, but he isn’t getting “serviced” in the front of the bus by a random woman. Just hanging out and drinking and IDK. Bret isn’t an idiot he knows what women consider cheating.

  6. Ethel says:

    Can’t you still get STD’s doing oral sex? Talk about having your cake and eating it too. This guy is whack. And the wig with bandanna needs a more modern look. I bet he’d look good completely shaved bald.

  7. mojoman says:

    Wow, his wife/girlfriend is pretty…pretty PLASTIC is I mean :-)

  8. Fluffy Kitten Tail says:

    Can’t stand this loser. Why is he even relevant these days? His glory days ended long ago with that stupid Thorny Rose song.

  9. Syko says:

    I didn’t take it as a metaphor for anything at all. To me it was referring to the tour bus, and partying up at the front, but not moving the party to the back where the bedrooms are.

  10. MightyMouse says:

    Kali, I agree with CB on this. Police officers are suspicious and looking to make a case against you, that’s how they’re trained. They are not angels of truth and justice. They are flawed human beings, like the rest of us, who are given a degree of authority far surpassing normal limits. I will refrain from giving my full opinion of the police because it is very negative, but please do not be naive.

  11. MightyMouse says:

    And Kristi needs to lay off the plastic surgery. She’s far too young to look that old.

  12. SisterMaryHotPantz says:

    As an attorney, I would advise you NOT to give legal advice to your readers. The advice you gave incorrect. Just because you read it on the internet doesnt make it true.

  13. NayNay says:

    I’m sorry, but I do not believe what he is saying, at all. I wish him all the power.

  14. Marjalane says:

    Yuck. This guys looks like a walking cootie. It’s pitiful that this is the example of a man he’s impressing upon his daughters.

  15. Fluffy Kitten Tail says:

    Here’s the deal, like it or not, drugs, that includes pot, are ILLEGAL! If you have them in your vehicle, it is ILLEGAL. You can hate on the cops all you want, and give advice here on what to do, but the simplest thing to do is not have illegal substances in your car, then you do not have to worry about the cops at all.

  16. Celebitchy says:

    Ok, person who claims to be an attorney. I will reword that part so it’s a general link and sounds less like advice. Thank you.

    Edit: However, the advice I gave was based on this very convincing lecture by a law professor, which I would encourage people to watch (it’s long, but interesting):
    http://flexyourrights.org/faq/do_I_have_to_answer_questions

  17. Maritza says:

    That is one beautiful family! He needs to take care of himself and his family, he should slow down and take a long vacation.

  18. suz says:

    That woman looks pretty plastic, but I must admit I was expecting worse. Their kids are gorgeous.

  19. Cirque28 says:

    Shockingly, many people don’t realize they have the right to refuse a search of their car during a routine traffic stop.

    I’m grateful for the job the police do and I have NOTHING to hide. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t exercise our rights! This can be done with respect. I just smile and say, “No thank you, Officer.”

    “You mind if I come inside your house?”

    “No thank you, Officer, I’ll come outside and talk to you.”

    Anyway, back to Bret Michaels and his committed relationship with wigs, extensions, caps, bandannas, cowboy hats, doo rags…

  20. GatsbyGal says:

    Well, I’m definitely glad he knows in hindsight that Rock of Love was both a trainwreck and not the best way to find a soulmate.

  21. SammyHammy says:

    Those are a couple of happy looking kids. That’s got to count for something. (unlike the poor girls that Denise Richards has…they always look so down and depressed. Can’t wait ’til they’re adults and write their books…)

  22. Tabbyfoof says:

    I can understand drawing a line between vaginal intercourse and other kinds of sexual activity. Even though you can still get diseases, there’s absolutely no chance of pregnancy with oral, etc. Pregnancy is a big deal–18 years of monetary support and never-ending ties–particularly for a politician.

  23. Lindsay says:

    “If you’re ever pulled over by police in the US, you have the right not to consent to a search of your vehicle.” Nope, not entirely true they may search the “wing span” of your car for their safety (as well as your person) and anything they find is fair game. Which has been held up by the Supreme Court, wing span is loosely defined and can apply to anything inside the open part of the car but not the trunk – that requires a warrant or consent. Or they can argue plain view or probable cause. But the best advice given in the comments is just keep illegal stuff out of your car and as good good rule of thumb don’t break the law.

    The only thing I completely agree with is way too many people talk. Shut up and ask for a lawyer, guilty or innocent. The percentage of people that talk is huge and confounds legal professors how this still happens with crime shows, Dateline ect. Even if you are innocent the best way to handle it is with an attorney. Also, an attorney in your area will know they laws that apply in your state, which differ and you can trust them more than anything you read on the internet. There is lots of stupid advice out there like sucking on pennies to “trick” the breathalyzer test.

    Cooperate as much as possible while keeping your mouth shut, last thing you want to do is piss of the officer. Especially if it is for speeding, if you make it personal they will remember you and be sure to turn up in court, which can only hurt you. Also, always say no when they ask if you know why you were pulled over don’t add possible citations you admitted to.

    I will try and find a link to the video by a law professor that makes great points of why to never talk.

  24. Majosha says:

    LindaR: Bret’s hair packed up and left town years ago. Hence that ridiculous “weave-danna” — thank you, Michael K — thing on his head.

    His kids are gorgeous, though. And at least the older one is dressed appropriately for her age. (Ugh, I’m starting to sound like my Mom.)

  25. RHONYC says:

    that blonde kid could be kate hudson’s kid’s twin.

    yikes. :-(

  26. gg says:

    So he can get blowies and make out with anything he wants, but it’s okay because he’s not having intercourse? Please, don’t insult us all, Bret – we’re not buying it.

    This guy is taking full advantage of the gullibility of “rock n roll chicks” so he can have his cake and eat it too. Disgusting. The girlfriend and the groupies are all complicit in this behavior. Ladies, don’t ever be in a situation where you have to wait in line to have time with some guy. NOBODY IS WORTH giving away all your self respect or power just to be one of somebody’s “girls on the side”.

    As to the happy family photo, his girls are happy and excited because they never get to see their dad because he cares more about his damn loser fans and self glorification and attention than his own family. He’s being very selfish.

    As to his talent, he has little, if any.

  27. RHONYC says:

    @ Kali:

    ————————

    ditto on the cop thing. i grew up learning to respect police. yeah, a couple of bad apples spoil the bunch, but that’s true in any field dealing with authority.

    as for his chick…

    a case of classic low self-esteem.

  28. sapphire says:

    No, no, no. Despite all the rationalizations, it’s cheating and he’s a moron. Sad excuse for even semi-fidelity.

    There are a lot of exceptions to warrentless searches with or without consent. Being polite while you decline is always a good idea. There is a great saying in criminal law practice “If you don’t talk, you might walk”.

  29. Lady LaLa says:

    How come the kids are named Sychak???

  30. Kiska says:

    He was joking in that quote about not going all the way. If you’ve ever seen him interviewed he is always cracking jokes like that.

  31. What????? says:

    I’m glad he is out of the hospital, but does he really need to be such a pig to be a “rock” star? He is using that as an exuse to be a male whore. And as far as Kristy, what is she saying about her own self esteem to put up with that? Bret said she went into the relationship with eyes wide open. I think she is looking at his bank account so she can get breast implants, botox, and whatever else.

    What kind of example are the both of them teaching the kids?

    I think Bret needs to grow up and be a man.

  32. bjf says:

    As another attorney, I would advise you not take advice from anyone claiming to be an attorney who can’t even string together a complete sentence. But, then again, that’s just common sense.

  33. original kate says:

    no way is his wife 39. 49, maybe…

  34. Fluffy Kitten Tail says:

    @Lady Lala- Because that is his last name.

  35. Jeri says:

    I think part of his reluctance to marry is for his rock star image. Just a guess but he comes across that way to me. Maybe that’s his line though, who knows. His kids do look very happy.

  36. lola lola says:

    CB: What you said is true and correct. And advice concerning personal rights and the law is not ‘legal advice’…if that was true, my mom would be in the clink.

  37. Liana says:

    an attorney would know about the Miranda warning, wouldn’t one? (You have the right to remain silent… you have the right to an attorney… etc)

  38. LolaBella says:

    So what he’s saying is that he’ll let the groupies blow him (in the front of the bus), but he won’t have sexual intercourse (in the beds in the back of the bus)?

    That’s right Bret, you stay classy.

  39. sabine says:

    Ok, so Bret Michaels is a total media whore. Yes, i know he had the brain thing and i am sorry but he played on that, too.
    His reality show was damn near pornographic, his wig is rediculous and we all know he cheats left and right.
    He isn’t a bad looking guy but the 80′s are over – grow up !!

  40. Lindsay says:

    Cirque28 – Your house and your car are two separate matters. The wingspan searches of anything you could reach inside your car is to keep the officers safe even in a routine traffic stop or to keep you from tampering with evidence.

    In 1969, in Chimel v. California, the U.S. Supreme Court set out the current boundaries of what it called “search incident to arrest.” When arresting a person for a crime on the basis of probable cause, the Court said, police possess the authority to search the person and the area within his or her immediate control.

    Observing that an arrested person could reach for a weapon (to effect an escape or assault the arresting officer(s)) or evidence (to destroy it), the Court determined that police must be able to perform a search to protect against these dangers. Police could not, however, search beyond the area to which an arrestee had physical access. Among other things, the Court worried that a broader search authority would create an incentive for police to arrest people at home, rather than in public, in order to conduct a warrantless search of the home. After Chimel, however, wherever an arrest might occur, police would now have only the authority to search the person and area within her immediate control – a doctrine the scope of which has led some to nickname it the “wingspan rule.”

    This ruling made it so in public or in your car they CAN legally search your person and anything you can access in the area your in while protecting the 4th amendment rights when it comes to searching your home without a warrant or belief that someone inside was in immediate danger.

    Lola Lola- I’m glad your mom informs people of their rights under the constitution, it is something far to many people either don’t know or don’t understand but in this case you are misinformed. For the safety of the officers and to avoid tampering with evidence they do have the legal authority to search parts your car and person. Plus, she never said it was illegal just inadvisable in this type of forum.

    Liana- Nothing said by bjf or Sister Mary HC (who I believe your criticism is directed towards) comes close to contradicting the Miranda warning. You have the right to stay silent and the right to an attorney – exercise both rights. There is nothing in there protecting your right to take any legal advice you take from the internet or advice from “someone who can’t “string together a sentence” as a defense. Not knowing the law or stupidity is not a defense or a free pass to break the law and get away with whatever it is you did.

    CB- You are by far my favorite writer on here and the main reason I come to the site. You don’t confuse being vulgar with being funny but you do have witty commentary. But from now on leave the legal advice to the celeb’s lawyer. The comments veered way of track. People should learn their rights regardless of where they live. Americans as a whole should have a better understanding of the Constitution and the rights it affords them, as well as its importance being the basis of our government. However, this isn’t the best place to do it. But I do hope, if nothing else, the comments make people investigate their rights from a reliable source and can go more in depth. That would be the only thing I can think of that could possibly come from his point of view on fidelity.

  41. One possible theory is that his diabetes and other health problems prevent him from getting an erection … which would explain his new-found front-of-the-bus morality.

  42. Cirque28 says:

    I think there should be PSAs reminding people to (politely) SHUT UP when questioned by the police. Poor people tend to confess and get convicted. Rich people tend to clam up and hire a good attorney. It’s disgustingly classist and has nothing to do with lacking respect for the police or the vital job they do.

    And I agree with lola lola! Talking about our rights does not constitute giving legal advice.

  43. jacobsmama says:

    yah we should get rid of all cops, and live in anarchy, now that would be fun, no?

  44. Jen says:

    You don’t think he’s getting serviced at the front of the bus? Really? That guy is getting BJ’s wherever he can by whomever he can. But if you really prefer to live under your rock then I’ll let you do that.

  45. Jeri says:

    Lindsay:
    If you have so much wisdom to share why don’t you start your own blog & quit boring us. We’re not here to be educated.

  46. Carena says:

    It isn’t cheating if you and your significant other agree on the terms of your relationship. As long as you are honest with one another and agree to the rules ahead of time…

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