83rd annual Academy Awards: Old school meets ‘hip young’ = fail

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Last night’s Academy Awards were the most boring and interminable I can ever remember and that’s really saying something since they clocked in at only three and a half hours. The highlights included a couple of clever clip montages, a lot of beautiful outfits on Anne Hathaway, a couple of funny speeches, and some decent visuals and backdrops that I would compare to an impressive presentation during an otherwise dry and educational class field trip to the planetarium.

Bizarre theme meets very lame jokes
The theme was some kind of tribute to the olden days of film meets “hip and young” hosts in the form of Anne Hathaway and James Franco. They tried to make the awards young and accessible this year, but it felt incredibly cheesy and hoaky and all they managed to do was suck all the glamor and exclusivity out of it.

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James Franco was high and distant, Anne tried very hard
First of all, props to Anne Hathaway for doing her best with the very sh*t material she was given. The dresses she wore were stunning, she was enthusiastic and thrilled to be there, and she seemed to really enjoy herself. That said, she was also bland and immature. At one point she even started giggling uncontrollably. Franco just kind of delivered his incredibly bad lines, though, and he looked stoned and acted like he was just doing his job. The best skit that these two did, and that’s not saying much, was some kind of cross dressing number in which Hathaway donned a lady tux and sang a cheesy little diddy about how Hugh Jackman dissed her. Franco came out dressed as Marilyn Monroe and qipped “I just got a text message from Charlie Sheen.”


Jokes were bad and dated
James and Anne started out the night strong with a very clever and funny clip Inception-themed montage of some of the nominated films. (Above) They went into former host Alec Baldwin’s dream, going deeper to look like they had bit roles in The Social Network, The Fighter, True Grit and The King’s Speech. In the elevator on the way down they ran into Morgan Freeman, who narrated “So the naked girl from ‘Love and Other Drugs’ and the guy from General Hospital continued through Alec Baldwin’s dreams as they prepared to host the show.”

Other than that, the jokes these two read were really bad. At the beginning they gave a shout out to their mom and grandmother in the audience, who delivered equally bad jokes like “stand up straight” and “I just saw Marky Mark.” Unlike when Ellen hosted in 2008 and name-dropped people in the audience it felt more like open mic night at amateur comedy hour.

Other bad jokes included: “It was a good year for lesbians… ‘The Kids are All Right’ – Lesbians, ‘Black Swan’ – Dancing Lesbians, ‘Toy Story 3’ – Where’s the dad?

James Franco: “I am six degrees of Kevin Bacon separated from our next presenters. Look it up on the Internet.” I did see that on the Internet. In 1998.

Franco on how he was offended by the movie titles this year. “Winter’s Bone, Rabbit Hole, How to Train Your Dragon, that’s disgusting.”

Franco also mumbled something when introducing Jake Gyllenhaal and Amy Adams about how one of them kissed his co-star. He quickly added “in a movie,” as if kissing someone was scandalous otherwise. It was just bizarre.

Maybe Franco realized how f’cking bad his lines were and was just trying to get through the night.


Clip montages were very good but they were few and far between
There was an excellent autotune-the-news Gregory Brothers-type mashup (above, version updated thanks to Helen!) featuring Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone the Deathly Hallows Part 1 (Thanks Anna!), Toy Story 3, The Social Network and Twilight: Eclipse. I could only find that very crappy version online of this clip that probably cost over a million to produce. That speaks volumes about how well the Academy grasps technology. They’re back in the days when “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon” was relevant.

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Best Presenters
Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr. presented for visual effects and film editing. They played good cop, bad cop and RDJ complained about how the visual effects people bugged him on set. They were very natural and funny together and would have been much better hosts than Hathaway and Franco. Jude made a good joke, delivered effortlessly “If it wasn’t for them [the special effects people], your closest association with a superhero would be in 2001, when you got busted in a cheap hotel with a woman dressed as batgirl.” RDJ said “first of all that cheap hotel room cost $1,250 a night, secondly it was 2000, and most importantly she was dressed as wonderwoman.”

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Cate Blanchett was brilliant with a very quickly delivered “that’s gross” after seeing the clip from The Wolfman during Achievement in Makeup.

Russell Brand and Helen Mirren were cute and clever with a French and English banter while presenting Best Foreign Language film. They would have made an amazing hosting team.

Kirk Douglas was hard to understand while presenting Best Supporting Actress. The dude is 94 years old and suffered a stroke nearly 15 years ago. He made jokes that were better than most of the ones that Franco and Hathaway delivered. He cracked that Franco “looked better out of the cave,” said some things about beautiful women and then tried to joke about humor among different nationalities. “Hugh Jackman is laughing. Everyone in Australia thinks they’re funny. Colin Firth is not laughing. He’s British.”

Billy Crystal came on and talked about the late great Bob Hope, who hosted the Academy Awards for 18 years. He told some lame jokes and talked about how he met Bob Hope the first time and got flipped off by him from the audience. They showed clips of Bob Hope making jokes and he was funnier and more entertaining than James Franco or Anne Hathway could ever hope to be.

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Best acceptance speeches
Floppy-haired Luke Matheny took home the statue for Best Live Action Short Film for God is Love. He joked that he should have gotten a haircut, told everyone to check out the films on iTunes, and thanked his mom who did craft services for the film. He was thrilled to be there but he kept his cool and remained very funny.

Director Charles Ferguson gave some admonishment to the financial industry when he accepted for Best Documentary for Inside Job. This was very well put and succint. “Three years after a massive financial crisis caused by massive fraud, not a single financial executive has gone to jail and that’s wrong.” I need to see this movie. I just read that Matt Damon narrated, so I’m going to download it on iTunes tonight.

Singer/songwriter Randy Newman won best song for Toy Story 3‘s “We Belong Together.” He really grasped something that was lost on the Academy and joked that he didn’t want to thank people because he “wants to be good television.” He joked “My percentages aren’t great, I’ve been nominated 20 times and won twice.” He also bitched that only have four songs in the category. He was funny as hell.

The King’s Speech’s David Seidler, 73, won for best screenplay. “My father always said to me, I would be a late bloomer. I believe I’m the oldest person to win this particular award. I hope that record is broken quickly and often.” He also thanked “her majesty the Queen, for not putting me in the Tower of London for using the Melissa Leo f word.”

A long night with some mildly interesting parts
Overall the night dragged on and it felt like the Oscars lost their luster. We can look forward to plenty more mediocre ceremonies in the years to come. The Academy made a joint announcement with ABC that they’d re-upped their contract until 2020. Maybe in ten years time they’ll start writing jokes that would have been culturally relevant in 2011.

Drag screenshot via Huffington Post. Other photos credit: WENN.com

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82 Responses to “83rd annual Academy Awards: Old school meets ‘hip young’ = fail”

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  1. brin says:

    Thank you CB for enduring what I could not. I can’t watch the Oscars anymore they are too long & dull.
    They aren’t cool like the Globes and I don’t think they want to be. They are the not-so-grand dame of the awards shows.

  2. Quest says:

    I love most of the fashion on the red carpet but the show itself left me hanging.

    Reese, Helen and Celine looked amazing, hated Scarjo’s outfit and the ‘I just got f*cked in the limo hair’ she dawned. The men looked great, but could have done without the JT/Seacrest interview

    Franco looked stoned like hell and seemed spaced out. He was smiling more than that Chester Cat from Alice in Wonderland, maybe that is how he dealt with the lines he was given

  3. Cherry Rose says:

    Cosign with Brin. Thank god for these celebrity blog sites.

  4. Rita says:

    First, an “all hail” to Kaiser and her cinematic insights in identifying The Kings Speech as thee film of 2010 when it first came out. Her intuition is just one reason she is held in such high regard in this Bitch Academy.

    Goopy: She’s a name dropping snot but she has talent and she’s pretty. Her upcoming de-nuptualization might move her a bit closer to us commoners.

    Mirren was old school Oscar gorgeous.

    Judd Law was naturally “British Obnoxious” in his skit with Robert Downey.

    Cate Blanchett is always beautiful but a picture of Nemo on her chest would have completed the dress.

    Celine Dion is the beauty God intended all women to be.

  5. Meow Mix says:

    Horrible. Cheesy. That pre oscar interview with Franco in the Green Room or wherever the hell it was, was just hilarious though.

  6. Eve says:

    I’m really glad I didn’t watch this.

  7. jinni says:

    I thought James Franco’s complete lack of professionalism made Anne look even more annoying.

    Anne look extra over-the-top because he was so unanimated. He just stood there acting as if he’s just too good to be bothered to have to be entertaining. If he thought the material sucked, why not back out of the job, or come up with something better?

    He just stood around looking wasted, while mumbling his lines with a goofy smirk on his face. Save your stoner bs for Apatow movies and the college dorm, Franco.

  8. Samigirl says:

    Oh mannn….I swear I would kill for Anne’s glittery platforms that she is wearing with that tux. Gorgeous shoes 🙂

  9. Helen says:

    Here’s a link with the auto-tune music video mash-up:

    http://news.softpedia.com/news/Oscars-2011-The-Awesome-Auto-Tune-Music-Video-Mash-Up-186582.shtml

    The Youtube version doesn’t include We Will Prevail from King’s Speech. Still, He Doesn’t Own a Shirt RULES! :)))

  10. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    Oh I knew this concept was going to flop. I didn’t really watch it either, mute was my friend for the evening and I only listened to the important things. I mean watching this show on mute it LOOKED unbearable. Stick to the format and have a comedian host, Academy.

  11. Jackson says:

    Yeah, the show was boring. I think you nailed it: Franco seemed stoned and Ann did her best with crap material. I truly wish that, unless a comedian is hosting, please use the utmost restraint in writing ‘comedy bits.’ They generally aren’t funny and just feel forced and awkward.

  12. ruru says:

    I wasn’t expected anything much, coz Oscars are always boring and unfunny, but MAN it was bad this year. Especially disappointed with Franco, because he can be funny when he tries.

    Aside from that, Anne Hathaway looks adorable in that tux! She should play Zatanna in Batman 3, not Catwoman.

  13. Reality says:

    I made it about halfway, then went to bed. I found Anne Hathaway’s chipper disney princess voice and over-enthusiastic shtick annoying, and James Franca was just dull.

  14. Jayna says:

    Bring back Billy Crystal.

  15. WhiteNoise says:

    Thanks CB for the excellent post mortem. I love love love your Helen Mirren-Russell Brand hosting team idea! Maybe some future awards ceremony producers will pick it up. 🙂

  16. Ell says:

    Yes Anne and James were ill-matched and cringy. Either Alec Baldwin or Steve Martin work as hosts for me.

    Loved Dame Helen and Russell. I liked RDJ and Jude but felt they could have taken it farther and adored Randy Newman.

    @Rita I’ve never heard of us Brits being described as obnoxious, we’re hardly a known for being ‘in your face’ type people or show offs, wouldn’t that fit another nation of people better? I can only say WOW and MEOW.

  17. devilgirl says:

    I was so bored during the Oscars, and Anne Hathaway was painful to watch. Whoever thought it was a great idea to have both her and Franco as hosts, obviously was toking it up with Franco because it was horrible last night.

    The show was a snooze all the way around. Right down to the awards.

  18. Rita says:

    @Ell

    Please don’t take offense. I love the British but Jude’s accent made him sound particularly arrogant to a Yank like me. He came off as a genuine “Prick”, so maybe he’s a great actor. Us Yanks are just jealous because we can’t sound so sophisticated but we’ll keep trying.

  19. merski says:

    I’m just waiting patiently for somebody to rip Justin Timberlake a new one… (Lainey?) He was so embarassing it made me feel uncomfortable. :/

  20. Eve says:

    Bring back Billy Crystal.

    @ Jayna:

    Please, no. No, no, no, no and no.

    The last time I kinda liked the show was when Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin hosted it…the show was a little confusing (I blame the people who organized it), but they’re good at delivering the jokes.

    I wish Ricky Gervais would host the Oscars someday though, that would be amazing.

  21. Brittney says:

    I thought “in a movie” might be a snark at Jake’s “heterosexuality.”

  22. Lynda says:

    just sucked, awful.

  23. Johnthing says:

    James & Anne were AWFUL! The preshow was downright painful to watch. All conversations were stilted and boring. It was the worst thing I have ever watched. I ditched it before I had to watch Goopy sing. Total Disaster.

  24. Zelda says:

    If you have to say you are “hip” and/or “young” I guarantee you are not.

    Ditto for “classy”, “powerful”, “a lady”, “crazy/wild,” “edgy”.

    Do not use.

  25. Kiki says:

    I loved Russel and Dame Helen!

  26. Marjalane says:

    Without even looking at the byline I can always tell when celebitchy is writing the post; She is WAY too polite! That show sucked right from the start! That Inception bit was lame, most of the “big” stars, (I’m looking at you Tom Hanks) came off as incredibly smug- James Franco couldn’t have been more worthless as a host and apparently someone told Anne Hathaway that she should “just be herself”, and that was wrong. She should have made an effort to have at least ACTED like she was hosting the Academy Awards. The best part of the night was Celine Dion singing about dead people! How sad is that? Oh, and Billy Crystal showing up to toss more shame on Hathaway and Franco- that just served to underline how awful they were as hosts.

  27. Adrien says:

    I wished Charlie Sheen hosted this year’s Oscars.

  28. ol cranky says:

    I suffered through 90% of the telecast just to watch Firth win. That said, the writing for the hosts and presenters was actually worse than that song Goopy performed (seriously, why the hell was that nominated?!).

    Has Kirk Douglas had another stroke? I swear I’ve seen him speak a lot better after his stroke and was surprised at how hard he was to understand.

  29. Melanie says:

    This is the first time I attempted to watch an award show in years. It’s not so bad if you give the DVR a 30 minute head start and fast forward as needed. Of course, I guess you can’t do that since you’re expected to cover it the next day. You’re a trooper. 😉 Having said that, I thought Randy Newman and Luke Matheny were really endearing. Also, I hated the intro. I thought it was funny at first but then it dragged on too long.

  30. TXCinderella says:

    I thought Anne did a great job and I felt bad for her. She tried to stay upbeat even though her co-host was a total bore. What was James Franco’s deal? Was he high? It seemed he was, or just had stage fright.

  31. Az says:

    Did they use the SNL writers? Because the jokes were awful.

  32. Ell says:

    @Rita, thanks for explaining, I appreciate it. I’m not a Jude fan either, he’s over-rated.

    I’d just read a few anti-Brit posts on the blog today, went all patriotic..goodness knows why, if I had money I’d move in a heartbeat.

  33. Ell says:

    Please, I’m not a Goopy hater but did anyone else have a jaw drop moment when Jennifer Hudson described Gwyneth as country music’s newest star or similar???

    I thought her performance was painful, she was visibly nervous and just couldn’t fake it. Celine’s ‘Smile’ put her even further in the shade.

  34. anonymous says:

    Turned to the cooking channel after a few minutes, Anne Hathaway sucked the air out of the room and she was doing so since she was asked to host, the show was about her, not about the nominees. I just don’t think she has it in the looks department, big eyes and big teeth.

  35. Jesus Christ Superstar says:

    You should definitely see Inside Job! It was one of the best things I saw last year. Everything is done really well, and Matt Damon was great as the narrator. But, just as a warning, you WILL leave that movie incredibly angry. 5/5.

  36. Siren6 says:

    Kevin Spacey would have been an awesome solo host.

    Robert Downey Jr and Jude Law would have been a great duo for hosting duties.

    I honestly felt bad for Anne and James; their material sucked and they weren’t capable of overcoming it. It made for a very thin feeling show.

  37. Rita says:

    @Ell

    Thanks for your understanding babe.

    I did have one “obnoxious” experience at 2:00 AM in East London “Rabbitting” beneath the Bow Bells with a Brit who was three “Pints” into the wind. “Cor Blimey”, he propsitioned me infront of my husband.

    Here in the states we call our Cockney, Redneckneckers. Each adds to the flavors of our cultures.

    Be well today.

  38. Oi says:

    yeah, that’s what I thought. I think that’s what everyone thought when they announced them. I think someone needs to slap Franco. He’s about as pretentious as it gets, AND he’s useless.

  39. guesty says:

    billy crystal was the only redeeming moment imho. he should host time & time again whether he wants to or not!!

  40. Sumodo1 says:

    I tuned in and out to watch Big Love on HBO. Twice, back-to-back. It was THAT bad.

  41. beth says:

    you know what, i have not cared to watch the oscars either – i’m getting nearly ALL of my oscar feedback from celebitchy…

  42. Sophie says:

    I felt so sorry for Anne, James was being a total dick the entire night and she was just trying to overcompensate in the hope that nobody would notice how much of a tool he was being.

  43. dread pirate cuervo says:

    James Franco was sooooo high! I thought Anne did good & I loved all her outfits.

  44. crazymary says:

    Only thing that made me laugh @ all was after they cut back from the clip of the technical Academy winners and Franco said: “Congratulations nerds”.

    I’m still laughing.

  45. lady of the lake says:

    They were bending over backwards to offset the “rudeness” of Ricky Gervais at the Globes, and that’s the main reason, IMHO, this show was DOA. Blandness and smug patting-ourselves-on-the-back ruled. As for the co-hosts: James was stilted, and Anne acted like an overenthusiastic fifth-grader. Also, I couldn’t find one moment where James actually looked at Anne to relate to her. All his lines were delivered straight ahead. At least she made an attempt to interact with him. But they didn’t work as co-hosts for sure. Bette Midler once hosted an awards show (not the Oscars) and she was amazing and funny. Let’s bring her onboard (though I do like the Brand/Mirren idea too!). Or get Tina Faye to be one of the writers and co-host. She’s sharp and ironic and FUNNY.

  46. AngelMay says:

    I usually find Anne Hathaway totally annoying but she earned her pay (do Oscar hosts get paid) trying to prop up that mess and her tool co-host. She is a trouper.

  47. Abby says:

    I think Robert Downey Junior should host SOMETHING!!! Maybe with Sandra Bullock? Where can I vote on this?

  48. Majosha says:

    Randy Newman’s speech was the best (with Colin a very close second). And Franco looked pale and uncomfortable — maybe he started coming down earlier than expected.

  49. AnnaBegins says:

    CB- The autotune clip was from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1, not Sorcerer’s Stone.

    Somewhere, Ricky Gervais is laughing his ass off. I’ll take sarcastic/witty/unapologetic jokes every time, especially after sitting through last night’s trainwreck.

  50. flutters says:

    Yeah Anne tried but neither she nor James were able to rise above the very mediocre writing. I really like both of them but it was too conservative a show and their chemistry in the pre-Oscar ads was SO much better than their chemistry on the stage. A lot of wasted potential based on the talent of the hosts.

  51. jen34 says:

    I don’t see why James Franco and Anne Hathaway even accepted the hosting job in the first place. They bombed. I hope James has a sense of humor about all the criticism he is going to get, because he seemed a bit sensitive about the Ricky Gervais remark. He is now over-exposed and he better stop showing up everywhere. Bad career move for both of them.

  52. JuJuBee says:

    I swear it went over my head or something, but does anyone know why Javier Bardem and Josh Brolin presented in matching tuxedos? BTW this show sucked horribly. Fifteen minutes in and I was already clock watching and hitting mute on my tv.

  53. spinner says:

    Anne was so busy overcompensating for James Franco’s lack of ANYTHING that she completely went over the top. That said…OMG!! How fabulous did Helen Mirren look? Absolutely beautiful. The rich gun metal color of her dress & the cut complimented her beautifully.

    Girl crush!! Swoooon!!

  54. jc126 says:

    I hate Billy Crystal. I knew that the AH/JF combo wouldn’t work well, but I still love him. She annoys me slightly less now.

  55. Aqua says:

    I watched it off and on last night.I find most award shows long and boring except maybe the SAG.Between the ORC then The Oscar Show then the after show the whole night is just a little to much. They need to shorten it somehow but I guess everyone involved in a movie wants their turn on the stage.I give kudos to Ann and James for trying they were trying to reach a younger demo.The Oscar crowd seems to be very hard to please and past host have said it was a tough job.They put themselves out there and every host gets slammed in the papers the next day so who would want the job even though they are actors and comedians who are use to it.

  56. Wendy City says:

    She seriously needs some sun. On this picture she is beyond pale. She looks like translucent.

  57. Francesca says:

    Bad right out of the gate. The bachelor would have done a better job than Franco…

    Sandra Bullock and Alec Baldwin next year?

  58. Robb7 says:

    These are NOT entertainers; they’re actors and good ones. This “show” needs to be pared down to one hour of the highlight awards — and new writers (get rid of Bruce Vilanch!!) are desperatel y needed. They were trying to get a younger audience, but you don’t become hip and cool with bad chemistry, bad script, dumb jokes, auto-tune musical numbers, and actors who don’t have the charisma nor skill set to entertain a live audience!! The WORST EVER!!!

    Bring back Billy Crystal, please!

  59. Robb7 says:

    These are NOT entertainers; they’re actors and good ones. This “show” needs to be pared down to one hour of the highlight awards — and new writers (get rid of Bruce Vilanch!!) are desperately needed. They were trying to get a younger audience, but you don’t become hip and cool with bad chemistry, bad script, dumb jokes, auto-tune musical numbers, and actors who don’t have the charisma nor skill set to entertain a live audience!! The WORST EVER!!!

    Bring back Billy Crystal, please!

  60. TG says:

    @Ell – I love the Brits. Never heard of them being obnoxious either. You guys have the absolute best humor ever IMHO!! You guys can get away with saying anything and it is funny, including Princess Di jokes that would be uncool if said this side of the pond.

    And your Working Title Film production company produces fun films too.

  61. Solveig says:

    Franco was just atrocious and Anne looked like she was on something. Maybe she was over-the-top just to compensate the lack of liveliness of her partner. But I liked almost every gown of hers.

  62. spinner says:

    I just talked to my friend who was an insider at the awards. She told me that James Franco was stoned off his arse. They didn’t think he was going to make it.
    Hee.

  63. chasingadalia says:

    Anne had on waaaaay too much makeup.

  64. Rita says:

    @spinner

    Love you “inside” gals. What is it with people who are given such an opportunity and think they can get by with being stoned in front of millions of people? It must be that they don’t have the courage or confidence to go out there with what they have to offer.

    If that’s the case, don’t take the gig.

  65. hairball says:

    “Thank you CB for enduring what I could not. I can’t watch the Oscars anymore they are too long & dull.”

    Same here.

    Plus, when I heard those two were hosting, I knew for sure I would not be watching.

  66. jinni says:

    JuJubee#52:

    Before they were introduced, Anne talked about how the first Ocsars took place in the Roosevelt Hotel right across the street from where the current one was taking place.

    The first Ocsars took place in the late 20’s/early 30’s, during this era it was considered the height of elegance for men to wear white dinner jackets to glamourous events. So, they were both dressed in outfits that would have been worn by actors at the first Oscars. They even had jazz music playing when Javier and Josh came out to add to the era they were talking about.

  67. Anna says:

    Would it have killed Franco to take that sneer of his face for a few minutes?

  68. harfang says:

    Abby has seriously hit on something with the RDJ + Bullock idea.

    I think Hathaway was all right. She would have been much better off alone, really. Franco was HORRIBLE. The lesbians joke was also HORRIBLE. Don’t call us, we’ll call you, OK Academy?

  69. ordinarygirl86 says:

    Anne began strong but as the show dragged out I just wanted someone to give her a qualude backstage- girlfriend was an overeager TRY HARD which became even more and more annoying next to laidback stoner Franco!!!

  70. the original bellaluna says:

    See, I did the opposite of ‘ol cranky (above): I skipped 90% of the telecast to see Colin win.

    From the posts/comments, I’m guessing I made the wiser decision. But then, I knew when the hosts were announced it would be a snoozefest.

  71. spinner says:

    @ Rita…I totally agree with you. He should not have taken the gig. But you know – he’s such an incredible actor that he can play straight while stoned.

  72. JuJuBee says:

    Ahh thanks Jinni! I missed the intro, so the matching tuxedos made no sense to me. Actually the whole damn show made no sense to me.

  73. Jeri says:

    I also think Anne did a very good job. James Franco wasn’t good but did anyone expect better from him.

    Aren’t the Oscars about the movies and the nominees and winners? The show didn’t drag and the emphasis was on the movies and the people creating them, which was where it should have been. The back drops were beautiful and everything was well presented.

    The children at the end were wonderful and when the winners joined them it brought tears to my eyes – Well Done!!

  74. daisydoodle says:

    I don’t understand why Franco thinks he’s fooling anyone by being stoned…but who knows how many stoners we already in the audience, probably 75% if you include all prescription medications and illegal drugs.

  75. Juu says:

    That red dress with roses Anne wore, it looked like she had a second bigger butt.

  76. Vera says:

    Oh, I would love if Russel Brand and Helen Mirren hosted – it would be hilarious. Same would RDJ and Jude Law. James Franco and Anne Hathaway….yikes.

    It was quite promising with the Inception intro, then once they actually got onstage, I could tell the night would just feel awkward for the viewer as it was very choppy and forced. It isn’t good when almost all the presenters are better than the hosts.

    Franco looked high as a kite and Anne looked like her face would split from smiling so much. Changing outfits didn’t really help her – I feel if they spent more time improving their scripts rather than finding as many dress as possible it could have been better. They were pretty much all good – though the opening white one for as lovely as it was seemed too tight on her. It may have just been that she was nervous and/or didn’t know what to do with her hands, but she looked like she was having issues breathing and kept holding at her ribs.

    Overall, it wasn’t horrid, but it was the most boring I think I may have ever watched. The montages were great, the set was very well done, the script should have been scratched.

  77. Marianne says:

    I thought Anne did a great job. Franco, not so much. I think he’s a great actor, but he was either
    a)Stoned
    b)Tired
    c)Not giving a sh**

    and none of those options made an appealing host. However, I liked the opening montage. And Anne’s version of “On my Own”, and the auto tune montage. Those songs were way more entertaining those snooze fests actually nominated. I also thought Kirk Douglas was adorable.

    That being said, I would lobe to see RDJ host. Or Hugh Jackman again. Or maybe even Hugh Jackman with Anne Hathaway. Possibly even Justin Timberlake.

  78. dj says:

    Why not Hugh Jackman again. I hate all the singing and dancing but at least he was good and obviously had a great time. Kevin Spacey would be phenomenal! He does all kinds of impressions (good ones, esp. good Christopher Walken) and is debonair and really great sense of humor. Unfortunately, I haven’t seen him in much lately so maybe he would be up for the opportunity.

  79. Aqua says:

    Maybe they should do away with all award shows until they can figure out what do or until the viewing public misses them. If we do at all.Meant to say GG instead of SAG in previous comment.

  80. m says:

    I totally agree with everything said here…Yikes! Every soul who crossed the stage made Franco and Hathaway look worse and worse by comparison.* I cringed much of the night while my poor husband actually had to hide his face with a throw pillow in horrified empathetic embarrassment. Why not just throw a stone to find next year’s hosts? What do we have to look forward to in Hollywood if this is “hip and young?” Cate should have saved her hilarious comment for the end of the overall night. Eww.

    That said, I adored KD’s bits and have all the patience in the world for his post-stroke difficulty speaking. You could tell he knew he’d be difficult to understand and slowed his speech pace accordingly. That’s pro… and delightful!

    Btw, could someone “hip and young” please tell me who you all mean when you say “Goopy?” Are you referring to Celine? B/c of course her talent goes on and on, but that name is super funny.

    *oops, I must exclude Timberlake from this list, who embarrassed himself awfully. Maybe they’ll have him host next time just to make this year’s disaster look better.

  81. NicoleAM says:

    I sat through the bulk of it, and I cosign, Luke Matheny’s speech was by far my fave. I had to laugh when he thanked his mom for the craft services. But, the hosts weren’t particularly entertaining.

  82. Marianne says:

    @m : Goopy is Gwyneth Paltrow. Because she has some website called Goop…which basically makes her like a younger Martha Stewart.