Poor Taylor Lautner. Just the other day and for a mere moment, I genuinely thought that Vogue Italia had humiliated the guy to the furthest extent possible with that ridiculous waterworks photoshoot. Yet it’s quite possible that GQ Australia has made even more of a mockery of such an easy target. For one thing, Lautner is merely 19-years-old (and he looks a few years younger), so why is he covering a men’s magazine in the first place? Secondly, why make him look like a little kid playing dress-up in his father’s suits? It’s so cruel:

Certainly, this photoshoot is a very strange way to promote Abduction, which is a thriller-action movie but strictly appeals to the Twihard demographic; that is, it’s a film that will attract few people that reads men’s magazines. In Lautner’s defense, however, his little movie opened higher (on the same weekend) than and is still outpacing Clive Owen and Jason Statham’s Killer Elite. Further, Abduction (also unlike Killer Elite) has pulled in a respectable worldwide gross as well and has already recouped its budget with an extra $20 million left over. If one considers the DVD market as well, it’s safe to say that Lautner will actually be around to make a few more movies in the future. Will these be action movies though? Only time will tell, and now onto some exerpts from this GQ Australia interview:

On His Auditions For Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D: For commercial auditions, you’ll show up and there will be 200 kids. It’s all about looks. You walk in the room, the casting director looks at you, they say, “Say this line.” You say it and you walk out. Then you’d get a callback, and you’d show up and there would be 40 kids sitting there and they all look like you.

On Getting Mobbed By Fans: It comes down to what kind of mood you’re in. You have to make a decision before you go out: are you willing to sign autographs and take pictures, say hello and meet new people? I wouldn’t say I get upset about it. I asked for this. It gets frustrating. But during that frustration you say, “OK. Why am I frustrated? I’m doing what I love.” But sometimes you really just want to go do whatever you want to do.

On His $250,000 2012 SLS AMG Mercedes-Benz: As you know, I’ve been driving the same car [a BMW 5 series] for the past four years. But I’ve always been a huge car fan. And I would always go to dealerships and drool. And I definitely always had my eye on this car. And it was a long process before I even considered getting a car like that. It’s a childhood dream. My original car is the one I drive everywhere. I mean, I’ll occasionally take it for a spin. But it’s more me just being a car fan.

[From GQ Australia]

For the record, Lautner’s immensely expensive car spends most of its time in the garage of the home that he still shares with his parents. The journalist also hints that the rumors about Lautner’s sexuality will also be addressed in the full interview, you know, whatever that means. Finally, I know that a lot of you are getting sick of the Tom Cruise analogies, but the article makes very pointed mention of Lautner’s “Cruise-like” smile, so we might as well at least surrender to that small comparison. It’s true! Not to mention much less frightening than the rest of this dirt-lip photoshoot:

Photos courtesy of GQ Australia