Lindsay Lohan’s latest crack drama: her purse was “stolen” & then returned

For the love of all that is holy… Lindsay Lohan has more crack drama. But the bitch is so stupid, she’s just repeating old crack dramas at this point. A few days ago, LL decided she needed a vacation – probably because she’s been working SO HARD at the morgue. So LL, Ali and Pootie flew to Hawaii – see photos here. Apparently, her probation officer said it was okay, and you know that LL has a court date this week too, so she traveled to Hawaii with the understanding that she would be back for her court date. Unfortunately, LL is a crackhead who creates her crack drama wherever she goes – she left her Chanel purse unattended and wouldn’t you know, it got stolen. OH NOES. How ever will she be able to make it back to California? How 2010 Cannes Film Festival of her.

Lindsay Lohan’s Hawaii vacation just got a whole lot more stressful — TMZ has learned, she got her purse stolen last night … containing everything from her passport to tons of cash.

Sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ, Linds had been at a house party in Laie, Hawaii for about two hours — NOT drinking — and accidentally left her $5,000 Chanel purse in the car. When she came out, the purse was gone.

According to sources, the purse contained her passport (and other ID), her probation paperwork — giving her permission to take the trip — and lots of cold hard cash … good idea.

But it gets crazier — Lindsay is due back in California court on Wednesday for a hearing about her probation. It’s extremely unlikely, but if she misses her court date, the judge could find her in contempt and revoke her probation, landing her in the pokey.

If it all sounds familiar — it’s because the same exact thing happened to Lindsay last year while she was in Cannes … ‘Memba that?

Kahuku Police are currently investigating the situation.

[From TMZ]

Wait until the bench warrant is issued, then suddenly her purse and her passport will no longer be “missing” and she’ll be able to fly home right away. Some of you were wondering why she’s carrying her passport – I was assuming it’s because of all of the drama with her driver’s license, right? She needs a photo ID to fly, so she’s probably just using her passport? Or she’s just carrying her passport because she’s a dumb crackie and why not? Whatever.

UPDATE: Yeah… the purse has been returned, minus $10,000 cash.

Lindsay Lohan’s purse has made it back to its rightful owner safe and sound — passport and everything — but sources tell TMZ, the thief kept one massive jackpot … $10,000 in cash.

TMZ broke the story … Lindsay’s $5,000 Chanel purse was stolen last night from a Hawaii house party — and inside the bag … her passport, important probation docs, and a boatload of cash.

Sources tell us, Lindsay stayed long after police left — driving the entire party into a frenzy for hours looking for the purse — and up until this morning, she had come up empty.

But that’s when one of her friend’s eyed a suspicious-looking local, and asked if he knew where the bag was. We’re told the local denied everything, but showed up with the bag minutes later … claiming he found it on the street somewhere.

We’re told Lindsay was so ecstatic to have the bag back, she didn’t bother asking questions — despite the missing $10,000.

Traveler’s checks, people.

[From TMZ]

Dumb crackie. You know that $10,000 was her drug budget. She’s such a stupid drama queen.

Would you like more excerpts from LL’s Playboy interview? They’re pretty bad:

“Sex and sexuality are a part of nature, and I go along with nature,” the Mean Girls star says of her in-the-buff photos, which are an homage to the late Monroe’s own iconic Playboy spread. “Knowing yourself and your body is so important because it gives you confidence, and in life, women need confidence.”

In the leaked pics, Lohan wears just a pair of a pumps, with her blonde locks in retro-style waves and with her lips a bright shade of vampy red.

“It’s a very male-dominated world to begin with, so knowing yourself and being comfortable with your body is an important thing for me as a woman. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but this is mine.”

The former Disney cutiepie, of course, hasn’t had the most confidence-building several years, as her movie roles dried up and she ran into frequent troubles with the law over her partying, her drug and alcohol abuse, a related DUI, subsequent probation violations, even the theft of an expensive necklace.

But, looking forward, she says she’s learned from those transgressions. “Ultimately we are each responsible for ourselves and for our actions,” says the star, who has dodged long-term jail sentences more than once. “Looking back, I probably would have listened to and taken more advice from the people whom I admire and would have followed through with it more.”

How did the real trouble begin? Muses Lohan: “My stubbornness at 18 and 19 years old got in the way. During the past five years, I’ve learned that time flies faster than you think, and because you only live once you have to learn from your mistakes, live your dreams and be accountable.”

[From Us Weekly]

“…because you only live once you have to learn from your mistakes, live your dreams and be accountable…” ??? Is she living her dream as an international call girl? Is anything about her cracked-out legal dramas about accountability? Does she ever learn from her “mistakes”?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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87 Responses to “Lindsay Lohan’s latest crack drama: her purse was “stolen” & then returned”

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  1. deltron says:

    Does anyone know where the dress she is wearing in the last picture, with spikes and coke residue, is from? Thanks!

  2. brin says:

    No, she never learns from her mistakes, she is a crack liar.

  3. ShanKat says:

    Nobody stole this trick’s purse. Oldest crack drama in the crackbook.

  4. Quest says:

    tsk tsk…she will never learn

  5. labyrinth says:

    Is “a suspicious-looking local” the new version of “the black kid did it”?

  6. Hautie says:

    Dang, someone stole her vacation money she had saved for coke?

    That is just cruel.

    Maybe had Lohan been sober, she would have remember her purse.

  7. Sisi says:

    yeah when my purse would be stolen I’d also ask some random suspicious person on the street where it is *eyeroll*

    what a bunch of crack nonsense

  8. hillbilly in the corner says:

    Go listen to that “tape” of her “freaky” out on TMZ….
    sounds like a bunch of 12 yr old
    talking about a stolen Ipod.
    No wonder she has no acting offers
    thats the worst acting I’ve head i
    since her last interview……

  9. Amy says:

    (sarcastic font) I always walk around with at least $10,000 in *my* purse.(/sarcastic font)

  10. Ruby Red Lips says:

    Poor broke Lilo who can just lose 10k like that…WTF?!?!

    I reckon Linnocent was going to pull the same crackie lie that her passport was stolen/lost so she couldnt get back on time 4 court, only someone – prob Ali – warned her that no-one would fall for it 2nd time round

  11. Ruby Red Lips says:

    Also thinking about the 10k, this is prob crack fantasy to try and garner pity for her – no way in h8ll would Linnocent let her crack money disappear willingly!! Thats a lot of drugs!!

  12. Cathy says:

    I notice how they stress that she was not drinking, of course she ain’t, if you’re going to spend all your money (or somebody elses money probably) on crack she wouldn’t have anything left to drink with. Stupid twat

  13. Paul Frehley says:

    I don’t believe this happened at all. Just fake drama created to keep her name out there. Like other have pointed out, her “acting” on the tape is terrible.

    And why do you need a passport to get back into the US when your already in the US? She is as dumb as a bag of rocks.

    • atorontogal says:

      I’m Canadian and I even know that you don’t need a passport to travel to another state! Also a little off topic here but her butt looks great in the Playboy spread but if you’ve seen the pics of her on the beach in Hawaii it’s a flat pancake NOTHING at all like the Playboy spread! bwahahhahaha!

  14. Seal Team 6 says:

    You don’t need a passport to travel to Hawaii, since it’s part of the United States.

    I also don’t think this happened.

    • fabgrrl says:

      Ah, true of course. But you can also use your passport as your photo id to get on an airplane, if, say, you don’t have a drivers license for *some* reason.

      • Seal Team 6 says:

        She;s such an idiot, she probably thinks she needs a passport to fly to and from LAX and Hawaii. Ali, who appears to be the only Lohan with a few brains, probably told her Hawaii was part of the US, so that excuse wouldn’t work. This time.

      • constance says:

        But then she should have a state/national ID by now, amiright? LOL

        I agree with you, this is a non-issue to make publicity for going to Hawaii and this Playboy crap.

        @ST6 idk, last Interview with the Ali, she didn’t really come off as a privately educated AP college credit Honor Roll card carrying individual. I think she’s just resigned to hoping on the crack train until the front end crashes into a wall. :3

  15. dorothy says:

    Purse stolen, passport gone? Thats her standard scam for whenever she doesn’t want to come home or go to court. Come up with something new…that ones been used.

  16. Lindy says:

    Raise your hand if you think this actually happened….

    No hands up? Yeah.

  17. Sillyone says:

    Who in the world walks around with 10 grand in cash on them? When I go on vacation I use my debit/credit card and I keep between $500 and $1000 on me for taxis etc..Dumb bitch they should have left the purse and taken her and dropped her some where in the middle of the Amazon.

  18. Julie says:

    My take is not that she didn’t want to make it back to go to court, but was to get out of paying something that was fronted to her at the party or beforehand. The person “had” to believe her if she reported it stolen so publicly….oh, but alas she happened to find it asking a stranger. Girl, please!

  19. boo says:

    Oh, Lindsay, the crack drama queen is back to her crack shenanigans. Do I think 10k was stolen? No, as with anything to do with LL, it’s sketchy at best, who knows what really happened, and I don’t really care, she’s exhausting. I don’t know how the people that hang with her do it, oh yeah, they’re on drugs too, it’s the only way they would be able to function with her around. Go away LL, I’m tired of you.

  20. theaPie says:

    Her sister Ali is making her look like a moose in comparison.

  21. fluffyrabbit says:

    Ok let’s get this straight. Crackie goes to a party and is “robbed by locals” so immediately her first thought is to tape record her scratchy-ass profanity-laden voice. Someone just happened to have a tape recorder, because I know I always carry one when I go to parties and I don’t put it in my purse in case my purse is stolen! Then white oprah told her it would be a great idea to announce to the world she’s a complete dumbass that leaves $5000 purses laying around with $10,000 in it and send this “recording” to TMZ?

    Any other crack-riddled international hoebag knows that the first rule of thumb when traveling is to not flaunt money so I think it’s just great that she’s now informed the entire world that she frequently carries around 10K in cash. Brilliance!

  22. Bess says:

    I agree with those who say this entire incident never really happened. This is just LL’s way to make a little extra “fun” vacation money by selling the tape to TMZ.

  23. constance says:

    Daily Mail has a story with a lot of candid with Llohan and ex-pap/dealer? chatting it up. Looking at Ali,

    Playboy shoot #2 is Ali’s body with PS Lindsey face, boobs? That’s why no firecrotch is shown? Dina would go that low.

    Why are Lindsey’s legs always scarred up? Seriously gurl, use a pillow.

  24. Rita says:

    There is no honor amoung thieves.

  25. dena says:

    Crackheads don’t leave their purses ANYWHERE.

    If you know a drug addict, you know they guard their bags with their life. All their tools are in there!

  26. Firecracker says:

    I don’t know about the rest of you, but I always carry $10K in cash in my bag. You never know when you’re gonna need to replenish your stock.

  27. Hugh Mungus says:

    Insurance scam possibly?

  28. TG says:

    She probably has her passport because she has no idea Hawaii is a State.

  29. Karen says:

    I admit I listened to the audio for a few minutes, and I loved how she kept reiterating that the jeep was locked! Does she not get that a soft top jeep is never really “locked”??? And the voice of wisdom who clarifies that anyone could get in the back of a locked but soft topped jeep cracks me up. Then to top it off, she goes to the beach in a bikini that doesn’t fit, laughing and smirking – who does that when they’ve had $10,000 stolen? And we get to see the non-photoshopped flat crackie rear end. Lovely!

  30. Madisyn says:

    THANK GOD, our little freckled ass Cracken is back to ‘normal’. Making up lies and crack drama out of thin air. I hate that Hef had her straight jacketed for three weeks, now shes free to commit her usual CRACKnanigans for all of us to enjoy. Happy Holidays.

  31. Stephanie says:

    This bitch could do a line off her legal counsel’s table while court is in session during her next hearing and you know what would happen? Not a damn thing!!!!

  32. The Original Mia says:

    Dis bitch! Does she really think anyone believes this story? I bet she thought she’d say her purse was stolen and therefore, she couldn’t get back into the country until a new passport was issued. Dumbass probably doesn’t realize Hawaii is another state in the union. No passport needed. And that $10K was totally for her dealer. She probably spent it somewhere else and couldn’t pay him.

  33. Rook says:

    She’s carrying her passport because if she had just had her license “stolen” then the court would wonder why someone in LA couldn’t just overnight her passport so she could make her plane, and court, on time. If both are stolen..well, you can’t exactly take a Greyhound from Hawaii.

  34. e.non says:

    “It’s a very male-dominated world to begin with, so knowing yourself and being comfortable with your body is an important thing for me as a woman.”

    yeah … that’s why she blows up her lips till she can’t close her mouth; why she fries her skin; why she bleaches her hair ….

  35. Bess says:

    Did anyone else look at the photos of Lohan frolicking on the beach in her bikini? It serves as a good reminder of just how much photoshopping PB had to do to get the photos ready for print. Also, with all that PB money, you’d think she’d be able to buy herself a top that fits.

    Also, I think her probation officer made a big mistake in letting Blohan go to Hawaii b/c she was impressed that LL had completed the required # of hours at the morgue early. Why reward someone for complying with court orders? She’s doing what she’s supposed to do for the first time in a long time.

    • Madisyn says:

      I’m still in shock the p.o. let her go to Hawaii when the judge was absolutely CLEAR. And I’ll quote verbatim:

      “Your not to leave the country. Your not to leave the state without Ms. Mansfield’s approval and YOUR ONLY TO LEAVE THE STATE FOR WORK, which you have to prove to her that you have work and for holiday visits or visits to your family”.

      She’s not in Hawaii for ‘work’, so why did the p.o. let her go, especially soo close to her court date. ‘Conspiracy Me’ wonders if some of the PB money made its way into the hands of Ms. Mansfield?

  36. Boromir's bytch says:

    Remember back in 2006 when her Hermes bag was “stolen” at Heathrow Airport off her luggage cart. That time she reported she had 1 million dollars in jewelry and her asthma medicine in the orange Birkin bag she left unattended with her other luggage. The bag was returned intact by some paps who just happened to “find” it somewhere nearby.

  37. Meanchick says:

    In yet another chapter or Cracky Tales . . .

  38. Meanchick says:

    Oh yeah, Chanel, Hermes and Birkin bags. WHO leaves those unattended? Right.

  39. Shona says:

    I swear this girl who is in her early 20′s has wrinkles I don’t dare have at 34! At this point I would recomend Botox for her.

  40. Gizmerelda says:

    Hmmmmmm call me cynical but…… Cracken leaves channel purse containing 10000 dollars in it….. Purse goes “missing” and then suddenly returned minus the 10000 – I am betting it had a 10000 dollar bag of white powder in it – the perfect drug hustle – “sorry officer I have NO idea how that got there – my bag was stolen, don’t you know???!!!???”

    You fool no one Lindsay!

  41. Ruby says:

    North Shore Media in Hawaii is reporting that law enforcement has been tasked with a full and thorough investigation of Ms Lohan’s report that she was robbed of $10,000 cash. They are fed up with portrayals of the island of Oahu as unsafe.

    Investigators are looking at the source of the unusual amount of cash alleged missing by the troubled starlet and it’s purpose. They have reached out to Probation Services in Los Angeles to review the conditions of her probation, as well.”

  42. The Bobster says:

    Bull! The ten grand went up her nose.