Lindsay Lohan & Paris Hilton partied together until 7 a.m., when the cops came

In case you didn’t notice last week, I was kind of recovering from a Cracken Bender. Like, most of the time, I kind of enjoy making fun of Lindsay Lohan just because A) she deserves it because she’s the least sympathetic person ever (aside from actual war criminals) and B) in her crack-addled mind, she KNOWS she’s incredibly awesome, so what does it even matter? So… I needed a little break, and CB covered LL’s appearance on Glee - which, from what I gather, was barely two minutes of cracked-out timing and dumb jokes. So, considering that LL’s “comeback” is in full swing and that Lifetime “Liz & Dick” monstrosity is due to begin filming in two weeks or so, how is Lindsay spending her time? Why, she’s sitting at home, soberly reading her Bible. Just kidding, she’s partying until 7 am with Paris Hilton, and the party only ends when the cops come.

They both have long-standing reputations as Hollywood wild ones. And Paris Hilton, 31, and Lindsay Lohan, 25, didn’t do themselves any favours after attending a raucous party at a LA home until the early hours of Saturday morning.

Police were called to the Hollywood Hills residence after neighbours filed a noise complaint, according to onlookers. Paris was spotted leaving the property wearing dark sunglasses and a cap along with her friend, oil heir Brandon Davis.

Lindsay is understood to have made an undercover exit, hiding under a towel in the back seat of a friend’s car.

Lindsay and Paris are clearly on good terms again after a spectacular feud dating back to 2006, when the hotel heiress and Brandon crudely nicknamed her Firecrocth. The Mean Girls actress has been attempting to resuscitate her flagging career and recently made a guest appearance on Glee. But she reported to be a ‘total nightmare’ on the set of the hit show – which stars Lea Michele, Corey Monteith and Matthew Morrison – because she turned up late and did not know her lines.

Meanwhile Paris, who is dating DJ Afrojack, has been inspired to try a career change by her new beau. She will debut her DJ set in Sao Paulo, Brazil on June 23 in front 30,000 people. She will be following a performance by Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Lopez.

[From The Mail]

Wait, what? “She will be following a performance by Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Lopez.” As in, Jennifer Lopez and Kelly Clarkson are opening for… Paris Hilton? That can’t be right. As for the partying and such… of course. Why do Paris and Lindsay keep circling each other like the last crackies eyeing up the last crack rock? I get that they have “similar interests” and probably the same number of brain cells. But for God’s sake… I feel like this is 2006 all over again.

By the way, remember photographer Tyler Shields, the dude who took all of those crazy photos of The Cracken playing with a gun? Well, he did a new photo shoot with Lindsay for Vault Magazine – the photos haven’t been released yet, but part of Tyler’s interview has been excerpted. Isn’t that funny? Lindsay isn’t interviewed – Tyler Shields is. Oh, and Shields is a douche. He tells Vault, “People said she (Lindsay) was unstable, so I decided to show them what they were already believing, what they already chose to see.” He also says, “I’m not a label. I’m not a fashion. I’m not a celebrity…I’ll buy a Ferrari and blow it up. I come across so many people who are afraid to live. I want to give them a window to another world. I don’t believe in fear.” For goodness sake. You know who was a truly fearless photographer? The late Tim Hetherington. Tyler Shields is just a hack regurgitating pop culture clichés, and he thinks that’s somehow groundbreaking. It’s not.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

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96 Responses to “Lindsay Lohan & Paris Hilton partied together until 7 a.m., when the cops came”

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  1. Eve says:

    Every once in a while I’m reminded of both nitwits’s existence — I enjoy a way more the days I’m not.

  2. Rita says:

    “…she’s sitting at home, soberly reading her Bible. Just kidding.”

    So she’s not sober even when she’s reading her Bible?

  3. ahoyhoy says:

    I just realized the Cracken is only 25, so that dress is WAY too old for her. Looks like grandma’s fancy funeral dress.

    (I would wear it to a fancy funeral, but I’m 40 and love vintage.)

    • wunder says:

      Looks like granny’s bejewled dress in more ways than one-like the sagging tits. . . just 25 yrs old? Really!

      • deep says:

        The dress is horrible but the face is worse!! She is a rough looking 25 year old. She looks like a 50 year old has been hooker and needs to go away…Please, both her and Paris need to call it day and just go away. It’s so over for both of them. But, in the looks department Lilo is just gone. And, if she looks like this at 25 imagine what she will look like in another 5-10 years..that is if she makes it. :/ I don’t know if I feel sorry for her or not.

    • Maguita says:


      LiLo may be 26, but that’s in cracken years. Like the dog years, you have to multiply by 7 to get the true age of the monstrously-abused and decaying body.

      In cracken-to-real years calculation, Lindsay Lohan is 182 years old.

      That’s about right. Isn’t that what the Keeper of The Crypt looks like bloated on botox, alcohol and Meth?

    • Annie says:

      The fabric is beautiful but the style of the dress how it just hangs shapelessly around her waist is very granny-esque. Or is Lohan just granny shaped?

  4. Francesca says:

    Paris should just go back to school and maybe become a social worker/teacher or something.She shouldn’t be wild and party-crazy at 31 years old.

  5. Original Lucy says:

    Lindsey was probably just at the party trying to get everyone to stop drinking and drugging. She was so sincere in wanting to rid the room of booze and drugs she drank every last beverage and snorted every last line so she could help everyone stay off the bad shit. What a saint!!!!

  6. Jackie says:

    if my boyfriend’s name was ‘DJ Afrojack’, i would have to kill myself, or him.

  7. lisa says:

    I don’t understand her at all. But this is the face of substance abuse. People that are addicts are not able to really function. They can hold it together for a bit but they always slip back. She is getting some good opportunities and her behavior is endangering her from getting more. If she messes up on that Liz movie, I think a lot of doors will be closed for her.

    • Original Lucy says:

      Sorry, but your comment that addicts always slip back is not true. Yes, it is VERY difficult for an addict not to slip, but it can be done! But…YOU HAVE TO WORK AT IT AND YOU HAVE TO WANT IT!!! If Lindsey truly wanted sobriety she wouldn’t be going to parties and clubs. I’m working on two and half years of sobriety, and it took changing my attitude and my lifestyle…not saying I may never slip again…its one day at a time…but Lindsey doesn’t even try!

  8. Mirella says:

    Please make them both go away.

  9. Jayna says:

    Paris has slept with so many men that it’s frightening. She never evolved. Zero depth and still talking in her baby doll voice. Her boyfriends are becoming more and more budget.

    • Hautie says:

      No joke.

      Once upon a time Paris dated the very best. Boys with very wealthy families. Who spent a great deal of their money on her.

      But Paris did not have enough sense… to realize that being the biggest wh*re in town… would catch up to her.

      That she needed to get out of the bars/clubs before she hit 25.

      Before her reputation would cancel out all opportunities, to marry a decent wealthy man.

      Now she is dating some “DJ”. Who lets be honest, is using her.

      And Paris now has sunk so low, that she is letting Lindsay come back around.

      Hoping to ride on her infamous crack shenanigans, to get back on the cover of any tabloid.

      When was the last time Paris was on the cover of any magazine?

      But that whole Kardashian crew are getting covers every month.

      Dang! That has to be killing Paris.

  10. Roma says:

    Is this the same Hollywood Hills home that she’s been partying at lately?

    This is why she says she’s a “homebody” – it just ain’t her home.

  11. Bella says:

    It is like reunion – Whore Class of early 2000′s.

  12. Gia says:

    How. Does. Paris. Do. It??? She over 30 now and has been partying like this for…what…15 years?? How does she function???

    • Stacy Dresden says:

      Because that’s all she has to do each day. She claims to be so hard working and a “businesswoman” but her work seems to consist of traveling all over the world smiling, talking in the baby voice, and partying. It’s probably not too tiring when you can sleep all you want and “work” means hitting the play button on a computer as a DJ.

  13. Your Momma says:

    Honey, when it says “she’s following” a performance it means she is doing her set After the others. So no, she’s not opening for Kelly Clarkson (LOL).

  14. imabrat says:

    Wow. Even Paris Hilton looks younger than Lohan.

  15. Megan says:

    Love what you said about the photog, Kaiser. So true!

  16. Dee Cee says:

    Never forget Lohan.. Greasy Bear and Wonky are jealous, cruel and instinctively vindictive people who hate you..

  17. Quinn says:

    Seriously, where was the giant meteor when we had them all in one place??

  18. Green_Eyes says:

    2 flakes that continue to prove to me money cannot buy happiness, common sense, or apparently time w/ their hair stylists (yuck those awful roots and fake looking extensions)… And apparently favors do not pay the dentist either in Lohans case, those teeth just seem too big for her mouth.

    Makes me appreciate my lil menial existence bliss, chaos, and all:)

  19. dragonlady sakura says:

    I’m no stylist, but if Lindsay would get a nice haircut, dye her hair a darker shade of red and stop fucking with her face, she’d maybe stop looking like Janice from The Muppets. Just saying…

  20. Ginger says:

    ITO Kaiser…Tim’s work is amazing and will stand the stand the test of time! I can’t stand elitist, “artistic” db’s!!

  21. OhMyMy says:

    I was watching the end of Christopher Guest’s movie For Your Consideration the other night on tv.

    At the end of the movie Catherine O’Hara’s character goes overboard when she’s nominated for an award and goes all Hollywood with plastic surgery. Blond extensions, cheek fillers, plumped up lips and fake boobs. I was amazed she looked so much like LL does now and that movie was made back in 2006.

    • Boo says:

      I love that movie, but Catherine O’Hara’s character is really tragic. I guess the difference between her and Lindsay is the the CO character worked really hard and it amounted to nothing, while LL doesn’t work at all, and yet people continue to do cartwheels to support and celebrate her.

  22. Lucy2 says:

    What a useless bunch of bottom feeders.

  23. Izzy says:

    Memo to The Cracken: Wear a f!*king bra. They’re not perky anymore.

  24. Nudgie says:

    I can’t believe it – Paris is already starting to look like her Mother…

  25. deep says:

    And another memo to Lilo…cover your face next time you go ain’t “Perky” anymore. Man she really messed up. She just looks awful.

  26. fluffyrabbit says:

    I see in Paris’ first picture she’s starting to get some of the Cracken’s Cartman chins.

  27. A-Rod says:

    So Lilo, Paris AND Greasy Bear have all had cocaine related arrests. They’re up ’til 7 am partying? Hmmm… Oh, Memorial Day is coming up. Doesn’t one of them usually get a DUI or go to rehab this time of year?

  28. claire says:

    Every time I read stories of her partying, I flash back to her telling Matt Lauer what a homebody she is, with a straight face. One, I can’t believe she thinks people buy that, and two, Matt Lauer sucks as an interviewer – he didn’t even press her on it.

  29. the original bellaluna says:

    Anyone else willing to bet she was half-carried to the backseat of that car under a towel so the cops didn’t see her?

    And I am SO SICK of those “Grandmas’ Lace Doily” dresses!

    (I’m now going to get a pedicure, so I’ll be back later, ladies.) *raises cracktini to all*

  30. MaceyMay says:

    I was surprised to see an article this morning in my local Sunday newspaper (actual print addition)(I live in Pa.)about how everyone close to Liz and her fans are against Lilo playing her. Apparently the producers has been bombed with nasty emails from ppl all over telling him she shouldnt be the one to play her, some even calling him an
    He said there were a few supportive ones, not many tho, so Im assuming they were all from Dina and Ali. His cover-up response about their similarities is laughable. he should just come right out say its a publicity stunt and that they need the rating otherwise they would use someone with actual talent or at the very least a similar appearance.

  31. corey says:

    its like shes searching for some kind of “feeling” which is why she keeps reverting back to the partying. she cant seem to figure out. in that regard i feel a little sorry for her, seems like an unfulfilling and sad existence. i also notice that she complains about the all the negative attention that she gets yet she keeps doing these silly photo shoots , inviting the papparazzi into her life, going to “star magazine” events and doing TMZ interviews. I really get the sense from watching her that she’s really messed up its almost like she gets off on the humiliation…..

    • deep says:

      Actually I think that LiLo is mentally ill. Look at her. She needs mental help.

      • Boo says:

        When the court ordered her into UCLA inpatient psych treatment a few years ago, they let her go way early…which suggests that she either snowed them, they’re incompetent, or she is not ill enough to require long-term or intensive treatment. It boggles the mind…but so did the judge saying she was suspending her drug testing because she didn’t believe Lindsay was an addict. What the what?

      • deep says:

        I don’t get it either. She is obviously mentally ill. One only has to look at her to see that something is wrong with her. Drugs have really messed her up. I guess California just doesn’t want to deal with it. But, the woman needs help. At this point I think she has done permanent damage to her brain and it shows.

  32. Sarah says:

    Did Lohan get a nose job…it’s looking different.

  33. Miss Kitty says:

    I’m surprised that Paris is dating a bi-racial man when she has used the infamous “N” word when describing black people. Is she no longer a racist elitist?

  34. Anoni Mus says:

    What the hell is wrong with Lohan’s forehead? It’s a completely different color. Botox? Cover up for something else? I also noticed two strips on the sides of her upper nose. Nose job?
    She looks ghastly.

    • deep says:

      OMG this post just made me take a second look at her nose. How odd..This poor girl just looks so bad. She was a cute kid but now should be shown to people to show them why they shouldn’t do drugs. She is totally fried inside and out. Looking at her is actually freaking me out. Girl needs help really badly.

  35. Sillyone says:

    I just can’t even believe how low her boobies are hanging. Those things need holstered in a bad way.

  36. Jover says:

    Yes lucy2 and we work hard for our little money and this twit presses play and rakes in thousands,not fair,; I thought the people in brazil had better musical taste; surely they don’t regard Paris as an “artist”; is paris that big of a draw in the club scene? Sorry to say but that’s embarassing, not into that kind of music. BTW, I’m reminded of Tom Petty’s comment about computers and music wherein he stated that if this is the way music is going, just give the awards to the computers.

  37. skuddles says:

    Anytime I hear about these two being BFF’s again, I always immediately suspect Hilton is up to something… She sees Lohan’s career experiencing a little momentum now, plus Lohan’s attempt to clean up her act (at least on the surface) and suddenly Paris is her party pal again. I can totally see her being jealous, seeing as her own “career” is in the shitter… and Hilton taking pleasure in dragging Lohan back into the gutter as a way to sabotage what little credibility Lohan has scraped together as of late.

  38. RdyfrmycloseupmrDvlle says:

    They are both washed up and looking really fug at this point. In the one pick with Paris looking head on that double chin is AWFUL. Shes not a pretty girl anyway and never was.
    Regarding whats wrong with them… some of you have puzzled…yes, LL is bi-polar, a very serious mental illness. There is no cure. However if she took her medication and accepted intensive therapy she could improve….but its a never ending uphill struggle with lots of “falling off the wagon.”
    As to whats paris’s problem…..whatever is wrong with her aunt I think is whats wrong with her….which is low IQ and some sort of generic addiction problem mixed in with a ridiculous streak of being stupidly overly confident for no reason what so ever. Paris failed out of high school. She doesnt even have a high school diploma. I once heard her admit that she is not that smart. I felt sorry for her at the time. Now, at this point i dont anymore because she has done nothing with her life. Nothing constructive. She has lots of opportunity. You dont need to be a brainiac to start up a charity or a great business. She is basically a stupid rich young woman that just wants to do blow, get paid and party. Shes not going to age well. Look at her aunt to see her future. pretty sad. What a pair these two make.

  39. LeeLoo says:

    Paris is slowly becoming the Crypt Keeper from Tales from the Crypt. Lindsay is slowly morphing into Groucho Marx. Both are just fugly.

  40. Kosmos says:

    I have to say, I’m so glad we’re past the Paris stage…all we saw was Paris pushed in our faces, and now we are having to go through and somehow endure the horrible Kardashian period…Lohan looks a bit wasted in these pics. She doesn’t seem to be doing that well in coming to terms with a functional program. Does this mean she will always be living on the brink of excess and inability to control herself? If you’re doing crack for years on end, isn’t your nose eventually ruined?

  41. John Thing says:

    Why is Liho wearing a “bobbie” pin in her hair at this function? That dress is awful! Paris looks like a grinning fool. I agree that “Liz and Dick” is using cracken for publicity and will find a way to drop her after the outrage dies down.

  42. Ella says:

    Wow! What happened to her nose and lips?!

  43. Sara says:

    I’m sorry but IMO, when you hit 31, its time to go home around midnight. Leave the after parties to the twenty somethings.

  44. Str8Shooter says:

    Well, at least they weren’t flashing their vajay-jays too.

    Seriously. How is this NOT violating her probation?

    Throw this dumb broad in jail already! And take her ugly blond friend with her!

  45. hillbillygirl45 says:

    Well, well, well..the dynamic duo is back! Firecrotch and Ms. Immaho, partying till 7 a.m………hmmmmmm, now what could they POSSIBLY have been doing to stay awake THAT long?! You don’t reckon they were hittin’ the old pipe, do ya? Damn, Blohan looks worse every time I see her….why is she not in jail? I know good and well she couldn’t pass a pee test, I just don’t get it. And Paris is just too damn old to be carrying on like she’s 21……except she’s too frikkin’ stupid to do anything else. Both these self-absorbed idiots are a waste of space and oxygen. And, I hope Lifetime totally loses it’s ass………………