Taylor Swift, bangs trauma’d in Naeem Khan: terrible or not that bad?

These are new photos of Taylor Swift at the 2012 Canadian Country Music Association Awards. They were held on Sunday, but the photos were just released yesterday. Swifty won the Generation Award and of course she was SUPER surprised and she made her surprised face and everyone was happy.

Now, whenever I use the phrase “bangs trauma,” inevitably some bangs-defender comes into the comment thread and starts yelling at me for A) hating bangs almost always and B) referring to various bangs situations as “trauma”. Inevitably, however, I always return to the phrase because of THIS. Because this is my version of a public service announcement. Because there’s absolutely no reason for a pretty girl like Taylor Swift to look like THIS. Bangs-defenders, THIS is what gives bangs a bad name. Look at that crap on her head. Look at how she styled it. Just look. This is awful.

If I was doing Swifty’s hair and makeup, the most important issue – the issue that makeup and hair should be serving almost entirely – is making her eyes look bigger and less “hooded”. She has naturally “hooded” eyes, which gives her that naturally “sneaky” look, often described as “the bunny-boiler look” (of course it doesn’t help that her personality is full-on bunny-boiler either). My point? Bangs make her eyes look even more hooded, giving her an even shadier look.

As for the dress – it’s Naeem Khan. It’s the same silhouette she always wears. I feel like she has about fifty version of this dress. And yes, I guess we’re supposed to think she looks very demure and virginal.

Speaking of… what’s going on with Swifty and her almost-jailbait lover, Conor Kennedy? Conor and Swifty have been separated for a whole week!! He’s been at boarding school, and she’s been performing at the VMAs and picking up awards in Canada and appearing at Stand Up For Cancer. And she just flew to Rio de Janeiro, where she’s got a performance today. So will Swifty use this time to let her love for Conor mature and grow and deepen? Or will she make a plan to gate-crash his prep school and give a performance? According to People Mag, Swifty has “already” had performance requests from Conor’s schoolmates. A friend of Conor tells People, “We have a Friday night concert thing – one is in late fall. People want her to come sing.” Performing at your boyfriend’s prep school? Lame or Just Swifty?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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49 Responses to “Taylor Swift, bangs trauma’d in Naeem Khan: terrible or not that bad?”

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  1. Brown says:

    The styling is absolutely horrible. Honestly I hate most of the stuff she wears (with an exception to the white suit… I loved that…. minus the blood red lipstick tragedy she had going on) but her hair here is really the worst.

    I have very naturally squinty/small eyes so I can relate to the “hooded” look. This is doing her ZERO favors.

  2. Izzy says:

    At this point, it doesn’t matter to me what she wears or how she does her hair. I still hear the theme song from “Psycho” when I see a picture of her or hear her name.

  3. PHD in Gossip says:

    100% Wig. Seriously.

    • bella says:

      yeah, i agree – that thing on her head looks like a wig.
      i saw her and that disney kid…forget his name…on an Ellen repeat and all i kept thinking was Swifty’s hair looked fake…she wore it down, but something about the part and bangs looks unnatural…strange…

    • Bad Irene says:

      Makes a change from 100% beard I suppose.

      Clutches quivering bunny to chest and leaves thread.

  4. Erinn says:

    Ahaha… wouldn’t that be the kind of thing a teenage boy trying to embarrass another teenage boy would do?

    Pretend they REALLY want to hear the other guys famous girlfriend to sing just so they can tease him about it.

  5. Jackie O says:

    lame and swifty go hand in hand.

    most bangs do suck, but a small percentage of women look better with them…she is not one of them.

    • Amelia says:

      I was going to say, ‘lame’ and ‘Swifty’ are simply synonyms for each other.
      Although ‘bat-shit’ and ‘cray-cray’ are also close contenders.

    • IzzyB says:

      I’ve had bangs for 20 years now but without them I have a fivehead not a forehead.

      Taylor doesn’t have the need for bangs.

  6. Daisy says:

    Say what you want about Taylor Swift, but her new song Ronan is touching and all the proceeds are for children’s cancer. That’s just sweet.

  7. Devyn says:

    The term “hooded” in respect to eyelids always make me think of someone like Chloe Sevigny, where the crease is higher up. Taylor has kind of the epicanthic fold seen on Asians (same with Jennifer Lawrence). I think her bangs look pretty cute over all, but to each their own.

  8. kitty-bye says:

    Hope she brings back the curls 😀

    • Lauren says:

      Taylor is trying to morph herself into a Kennedy-esque Lady. Problem is…she is not an innocent Irish Catholic virgin–Taylor Lautner, Jake G., and John Mayer are all former boyfriends. Those are the dudes we know about. Swifty is very calculating, almost robotic.
      She has conquered the music world..now she wants to be part of so-called American Royalty. Ethel K. is going to block the Swifty Hurricane..and beat her at tennis.

  9. I.want.shoes says:

    I don’t think her eyelids are “hooded” as much as they are “squinty”. Because shifty Swifty is squinty. And with squinty eyes, you want to keep the hair OFF the forehead to give the illusion of openness.

    • alley says:

      How can this website report about Taylor’s “bangs trauma” and not even acknowledge the fact that she wrote a beautiful song about a little boy who lost his battle to cancer. She not only gave an amazing gift to a grieving mother, but also raised awareness and money to a terribly underfunded cause, childhood cancer. Shame on you.

      • Gossip PHD says:

        Kindly recall that this is a gossip website – Are you on her PR team? Sheesh.

      • Izzy says:

        Yes, it was very touching and generous of her. Too bad she can’t hold a tune even if it’s in a paper bag. The psycho stalker thing doesn’t help. Neither does the lack of maturity.

      • Ella says:

        Celebrities do stuff for charity all the time. They also have an obscene amount of money. They’re fair game.

  10. Anna says:

    It’s crazy how hard she is trying to dress like a Kennedy.

    • menlisa says:

      I know right!

    • KellyinSeattle says:

      That’s what I thought, too..!! She looks awful, though…most of the Kennedys know how to look good. She’s going to be stumbling and falling all over herself if she doesn’t 1) get out of those shoes and 2) if she keeps trying to “act/dress” like a Kennedy.

    • grace says:

      What? This outfit is typical Taylor. She has dressed like this for years.

  11. Emily says:

    The “bangs trauma” issue is a bit of a boy-who-cried-wolf situation. If you cry “bangs trauma” at every bangs you see, we’re less likely to take it seriously when you actually mean it. 😀

  12. Syko says:

    On board with the squinty eyes and clothes that look like my wardrobe from my senior year in high school (I graduated in 1960). Not on board with the statement that she is a pretty girl. Can’t see it. I think she’s weird looking.

  13. Rhea says:

    Meh. -_-

  14. LeslieM says:

    I think her dress and shoes are Gorgeous!

  15. melissa says:

    I was there. Besides the fact that her bangs are ridiculous, she couldn’t have given a worse speech. Stop pretending to be surprised, stop pretending you give a fk. Any other performer should have showed up. (It may appear like I dislike her, but I don’t. She just gave a shitty speech).

  16. Anna00 says:

    This girl reminds me of a bird.

  17. alys says:

    Her eyes look increasingly tweaked and have an unnatural slant which is not there in early photos of her, am really not sure its just the makeup or bangs.

  18. Nanea says:

    Swifty’s bangs look like she cut them herself in the dark with nail scissors. It also seems like she doesn’t own a mirror.

    Dress and shoes have that perpetual bridal look that she seems to favor.

  19. Erinn says:

    Ouch. I have bangs. However i also have a large forehead and mine don’t look like the glued straw to my head. I’ve tried growing them out and seriously doesnt look right. I do agree that THIS is a case of bangs trauma.

  20. dude says:

    I don’t know if this vicious story is written by a man or a woman. But from a middle age man I think she is absoutly adorable. You all sound like a bunch of jealous shrews. Its easy to to sit anonymously at a computer and tear some one to pieces. Try living your lives under a microscope most of you would commit suicide after the 2nd or 3rd article that is just mean.

    • rumbleseat says:

      Chill bro, she doesn’t want to be with you unless you’re still in high school. Which I guess you might be if your name is “Dude Kennedy.”

  21. Geo says:

    Swifty is here? She has a show?
    Where is this being advertised?

  22. deehunny says:

    Meh. I’m caring less about Swifty these days cuz at least she’s not a trainwreck like The Cracken or Bynes.

    Which is just terrible because as long as you’re not a total crack whore you’re a good human being in Hollywood.

  23. Camille (TheOriginal) says:

    Lame.

    And her styling is awful. She looks terrible.

  24. samira25 says:

    I don’t have a problem with the bangs but with the lose hair. Very rarely the lose, messy hair looks good. Taylor looks like she didn’t have time to do her hair.

  25. Luke says:

    I organize my closet by color – if Swifty does that same, it has to look like a ghost lynching. How much white does this girl own?

  26. Jill says:

    She’s aging fast. Must be from sleeping with all those older men. 😐

  27. Jeanie.amour says:

    I actually really like her bangs! Maybe I do because I have had nearly the same version of those bangs for years and years. Although whenever I wear them back, friends and fam say I look better without them, but I gotta go with what I like.