National Enquirer stars with cellulite and diet disasters

I find these pictures cruel for several reasons. First of all, most of these celebrities have great bodies and these little ripples are barely visible in person I bet. Case in point: Maria Sharapova, whose cellulite looks like a trick of the light. Sharapova is a world class athlete so her “cellulite” is like normal skin. Other women like Nicolette Sheridan, Paris Hilton, Mischa Barton, and Uma Thurman all have gorgeous bodies, and their supposed cellulite seems rather normal. If that’s what the skinny women have, how are normal-sized women supposed to feel? In fact the only really gross body in all these pictures is Star Jones. Mariah is looking paunchy, but that’s due to her choice of clothing, which is always for a much younger, skinnier woman.

Thanks to Sammie’s Effluvia for scanning the National Enquirer. I actually bought this issue and took pictures of it, but they had bright spots from the flash and the scanner was down so I said screw it. If you see these scans on another blog they’re probably from Sammie’s site.

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22 Responses to “National Enquirer stars with cellulite and diet disasters”

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  1. Domidroid says:

    Yeah, it’s pretty vile, and un-called for. I’ve got 2 small children under 3 (2 yr old, 5 month old), and I don’t look like I used to either. But last weekend I was at the beach with my family, and I wore my old bikini, stretch marks and all. It felt good. Yeah, sure, I knew I was being sized up by other chix, but so what? I wasn’t there to compete, my husbands a hottie, and the kids are darling, mission accomplished. They were cringing behind their spandex, trying to out-do each other. Women really shouldn’t worry about crap like this. If you’re happy and fulfilled in your personal life, you’re as attractive as you need to be.

  2. hank hill says:

    EVERYONE has cellulite. Even athletes.

    Look at some of these women – most of them have given birth so we should all be so lucky to look that “hideous”.

    HUMANS are created equal. Sorry folks, but celebs are people too.

  3. Bex says:

    Yeah, just goes to show you that EVERYONE’S got the stuff. Doesn’t matter how skinny or buff you are, cellulite=reality. Why paint it in a negative light even? It’s actually normal and healthy.

  4. Erica says:

    To be honest the picture of Maria Sharipova is RIDICULOUS, if you look at the top she is OBVIOUSLY lunging to a ball. When you slam down a limb onto pavement the concussion goes right up your leg, no matter HOW skinny you are! It sends ripples up your leg momentarily.

  5. Pecarrie says:

    What, is it a sin to have cellulite?
    We’re all going to hell, apparently… lol

  6. luigi says:

    I can’t believe they’re even criticizing middle-aged stars for having cellulite!

  7. Gigohead says:

    You know what it really proves? Buyer beware. These celebrities are obviously photoshopped in photos. So what you see is not what you get.

  8. MARY MACK says:

    This is probably why Sienna Miller considers herself pretty because she can pose with her back thighs without cellulite. South East Asian girls don’t get cellulite for a long time.

  9. Bewilderbeast says:

    What a disturbing topic for a story. Cellulite’s a fact of life. Get over it. Not that we can expect real news (or decency) from the National Enquirer…

  10. Leigh says:

    There are two problems here: National Enquirer is not really a bastion of truth to begin with, and there is obvious photoshopping going on. The pic of Paris’s thigh makes it look like it’s enormous and is entirely disproportional to her body. And we’ve all seen enough of Paris’s legs to know that’s not true.

  11. kailie2 says:

    I think that some of the photos are photoshopped. Others are what you get when you catch someone in harsh sunlight and then zoom in on the targeted area. Very few genetically blessed women don’t get it, but most do. I find those stories appalling. They should rather focus on who dresses approprietly or wears a good swimsuit — at least that’s something one can improve.

  12. Ling says:

    What scared me the most was the mention of Katie Holmes’ maximum weight during pregnancy: 139 pounds. That’s revolting. A healthy woman of her height should weigh more than that without the baby. Sandra Bullock was also just at average with 120 pounds. 136 is normal for her height. Can’t a woman enjoy her middle age? I’m disgusted.

  13. aneurysm says:

    Maybe part of their motive in posting this was to make the rest of us feel better about our own imperfections. If that is the case, mission accomplished. :)
    I like seeing celebs looking less than perfect. I wish they would show more, instead of a freshly post op surgeried unrealistic movie star to give unreal expectations to the rest of the girls & women in the world.

  14. Domidroid says:


    Thanx again for The Word,
    Only thing is, I don’t find the motivation here altruistic. It just seems so dismorphically cruel, to ALL women. How about this: Tabloids show Women, looking and feeling their best, and “ordinary” women, aspire to the same. Much more balanced an end-result, than, “We’re all crap, we’re all ugly, why even bother?” Which is what I think they’re really going for.

  15. Cmora says:

    Where’s all the celeb. men looking awful?
    Why do they pick on only the female celebs.

    O my goodness they look normal and real!

  16. Timperament says:

    I wonder when the ‘man-boobs’ issue is out :P

  17. Gigohead says:

    Timperament, from your keyboard, to God’s ears.

    I’ll buy the issue for curiousity.

  18. MaiGirl says:

    Yeah…totaly mixed feelings here. It isn’t fair to pick on women (and, yes, the light is always harshest when it’s focused on women) who have an issue that almost all women have. BUT…there has to be some balance in how these celebrities are portrayed. With all of the Photoshop used to convince us all that these women are perfect, it is good to see the package unwrapped. Hopefully, these photos will remind us that perfect isn’t possible.

  19. Izzy says:

    Ling, stars generally inflate their heights by a couple of inches, so its a safe bet that Katie Holmes and Sandra Bullock aren’t as tall as they claim.

  20. Katherine says:


    Some women are just born skinny and lots of healthy women don’t gain a ton of weight during pregnancy. There’s no reason to say you’re disgusted or revolted. We’re not all starving ourselves.

  21. AC says:

    My baby neice who is 7 months old has cellulite on her butt when you sit her down naked… I’ve had it since I was a baby…. its normal to have at any age so I don’t know what this “ONLY 25!” stuff is. And its so easy to have when you’re moving around and active ESPECIALLY in sunlight. Jee Wizz. THey say “STARS SCARY THIN!” one week and then “HIDEOUS BODIES!” the next. What the hell do we want? Maybe say “bad PICTURES or what bad lighting can do to a nice body…. ” but not HIDEOUS EEWW LOOK! NORMAL BODIES!!

  22. Diana says:

    WOW…well…even the most beautiful people must deal with cellulite. Being thin doesn’t necessarily mean you won’t have a few dimples on your thighs. That’s just the name of the game! =/