Gerard Butler and Paris Hilton?

First comes dinner dates and thigh caressing with Jennifer Aniston. Then the drinking. And now Gerard Butler is *allegedly* making the move on Paris Hilton – or is allowing Paris to put the moves on him. LaineyGossip is reporting that Butler and Hilton were seen at a club together.

Apparently [Paris Hilton] spread her virus all over [Butler] last week at Bar Deluxe in LA. They were spotted getting “cosy” in a corner as she affectionately referred to him as her Braveheart.

Seriously. How hurting is Gerard Butler that he’d have to scrape the bottom of the urinal with that piece of sh-t hanging off his junk?

[From Lainey Gossip]

Her braveheart? You’re kidding me, right? That’s actually the only part of the story that makes me question the accuracy of the whole report. I don’t buy that Paris Hilton is smart enough to make a “Braveheart” reference. Why or why can’t Gerry Butler just find me? (Actually, I don’t want him if he’s been with Paris.)

Paris Hilton is shown on 12/15/08 leaving the Ivy. (Need attention much?) Credit: WENN Gerard Butler is shown 10/6/08 at the Rock ‘N Rolla premiere. Credit: PRPhotos

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31 Responses to “Gerard Butler and Paris Hilton?”

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  1. lady garden says:

    Noooooo-if true he must be pissed out of his brains

  2. Amy says:

    If she does call him Braveheart, I’m sure it came from a conversation like this:

    Paris: Wow, I love your French accent.

    Gerard: You dozy cunt, I’m Scottish! *has another drink*

    Paris: Wow, is that in Wales or Ireland?

    Gerard: No, pet, I’m from Scotland. *has another drink* You know, like Braveheart? William Wallace?

    Paris: *shrugs*

    Gerard: *beer goggles firmly in place* My God, in this darkened corner, you just suddenly became very attractive to me…

    The End.

  3. Ling says:

    I can forgive him for the romcoms, but I cannae forgive him for this.

    @Amy – that’s quite clever. We can only hope that it’s true.

  4. ri23 says:

    Ewwwww. If this shit is true he’s dead to me.

  5. SeVen says:

    I. WILL. CUT. HER. She took and tainted my Benji now shes tainting the Gerry Butt! This atrocity must be stopped!

  6. Syko says:

    Kaiser, he probably really is dead to you now. Or at least infected with herpes. Can’t we neuter her?

  7. SeVen says:

    Syko – For the Sake of Celebitchy women and Women world wide, we should do something about the gaping maw that is her vagina. At least we can be sure about one thing …. she never goes for ” normal” men … so our husbands / boyfriends / brothers and dads are all safe.

  8. Ellie says:

    If this is true he is totally ruined…. Excuse me while I go curl up on my bed.

  9. Syko says:

    SeVen, you’re probably right. It should be sewn shut, except that someone would have to touch her to sew it and nobody wants to do that.

    Not having a husband/ brother/ boyfriend/ dad around, I wasn’t real worried anyway. I do have a grown son, but if it would get him off the rollaway bed in my dining room, I’d even take on Paris Hilton as a daughter-in-law.

  10. Last summer I saw David Beckham at the airport but there were no reports of “Becks & mystery brunette at Newark Airport.” I’m guessing that’s b/c 2 people can be at the same place & not be together. Here’s to hoping he’s just a freak & thought she was a tranny hooker! :twisted:

  11. daisyfly says:

    You want to close her vaginal crevice for good? Find out who’s the next guy she’s doffing and pour liquid, two part epoxy over his piece before he sticks it in. That way, they’ll be stuck for life, and finally be an oddity worth blogging about.

  12. Syko says:

    Great idea, Daisyfly, but I can’t think of many men I hate enough to link him up to her forever. Possibly Dubya?

  13. geronimo says:

    There is not enough alcohol in the world to make Gerard find Paris attractive. Stop torturing yourself, kaiser. :P

  14. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa says:

    Amy you forgot the last part of the conversation:
    Paris: Here, Braveheart, why don’t you take my herpes, I MEAN-phone number and we can like you know, like, yeah. **wonky stare in a strange attempt to be sexy**
    Gerry: (directly to her chest) yeeeeaaaaaa

  15. Kaiser says:

    Yeesh, lots of implied violence on this thread! At least you girls have my back when Paris is putting the moves on my no-longer boyfriend.

    I honestly don’t know what’s gotten into him. The Aniston, the drinking and now *this* – he’s kind of getting gross and skeezy, right? :cry:

  16. Ling says:

    I rooted so hard for him and Aniston! Awesome freaking match, in my opinion.

  17. Samantha says:

    He is definitely off the wagon if he hooked up with her. How sad for him. :(

  18. Holly says:

    No way is this true. It seems he is the hot guy to attach any single celeb chick to: Diaz, Anniston, now this trash!!!! Even Cheryl Burke (really gross) and Shannon Mokler. God, I am feeling bad for this guy. If he talks to them or hugs them he is apparently also f**king them too.

  19. Mairead says:

    CB – is there any way of rigging Celebitchy Towers to block these types of stories from Kaiser’s computer. We’ve barely gotten her back to, er, normal after the Aniston Debacle.

    I may have to show her the Motorcycle Diaries so that the subtitles can distract her!!! (any inclusion of Roderigo de le Serna and Gael Garcia Bérnal is purely incidental :twisted: )

  20. Christina says:

    this man is so hot…. errrr… was :|

  21. michele says:

    Honestly, how can you even write “then the drinking”, you do not know if Mr. Butler is drinking again. The word “alleged” should be used if you must speculate.

    And this hook up is just as credible as the so call hook-up with Jennifer Aniston. And it’s the rumors for some reason that are getting “skeezy” not the actor.

  22. Syko says:

    “We’ve barely gotten her back to, er, normal after the Aniston Debacle.”

    Normal? Kaiser? 0.0

  23. Sickitten says:

    Ha Ha, Kaiser! I knew you’d be all over this story. Good post.

  24. Codzilla says:

    I usually like to “believe” a lot of the gossip that comes down the pike, just for the fun of it. But this is simply too much. No way in f*cking hell is Gerry banging this skank. With all the the hot chicks throwing themselves at his feet, it just defies comprehension that he would choose this brain dead ho. Even the thickest of beer goggles couldn’t turn this tramp into a decent piece of ass.

  25. Michelle says:

    You ladies are too funny! Gerry is not off the wagon and he sure isn’t into Paris, and obviously he was looking for a working relationship with Jennifer Aniston. He was just being nice to Paris but wouldn’t let himself be photographed with her. He did the same thing with Orlando Bloom’s girl.

  26. viper says:

    She should have said:

    “You are my spartan”

  27. CuriouslyAmused says:

    Seriously this can’t be true! She’s blond, a notable airhead and he seems to prefer in any case brunette exotic-looking skanks who won’t steal his spotlight.

  28. JC says:

    Wow. I thought he was classier than this. :(

  29. Liquid Muse says:

    Amy, I loved your post. Too funny.

    I seriously doubt Gerard has any romantic interest in Paris Herpes. She’s been used more than a toilet seat at Yankee Stadium.

    This is just another pitiful attempt by Ms. Hilton to garner attention. She’s running out of D-list people to bang, so now she’s focusing her efforts on A-listers. With any luck, she’ll super glue a chastity belt to her mid-drift and call it a day. Only then will any respectful men want to be with her. Geez, the only men that want to play with her kitty kat are younger than Ms. Hilton and obviously mentally retarded, or are older and lookin’ for a cheap thrill with no strings attached.

    Reading these posts makes me realize just how hateful people are to Paris. I certainly can understand why. Paris is at a point in her life where she wants to be known for being a “serious” actress (using the phrase loosely). Unless she stops her hard partying, universal whoring, and gets her flat a.s.s. back in school, she’ll never amount to much.

    “Judge of your natural character by what you do in your dreams.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

  30. Interesting post – just what I was looking for. ty.