Lindsay Lohan offered ridiculously generous plea deal with no jail time

Do you remember back in June 2012 when Lindsay Lohan crashed her Porsche on the Pacific Coast Highway and a million cracked-out stories filtered through the tabloid media? I remember specifically a story about Lindsay getting out of her totaled Porsche (getting out of the driver’s side) and taking a moment to throw away all of the containers of alcohol in the car. True, that story was largely unverified (I believe only one witness said it happened), but doesn’t it FEEL right? Doesn’t it feel like Lindsay is constantly behind the wheel while under the influence of alcohol and drugs? So… I don’t really get why this TMZ story is all breathless with the breaking news that Lindsay reeked of alcohol after the crash. But there are some interesting details about a plea bargain:

Lindsay Lohan may have been drinking just before she crashed her Porsche last June on Pacific Coast Highway … TMZ has learned. Nevertheless, prosecutors are offering her a brand new plea deal that does NOT involve jail.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ … a bottle of alcohol was found next to Lindsay’s Porsche, and we’re told her breath smelled of alcohol. For some reason, cops did not perform a field sobriety test at the scene of the crash.

Sources tell us … the Santa Monica City Attorney is prepared to offer Lindsay 60 days in a residential rehab facility in her lying-to-cops case — where she said she wasn’t driving the Porsche. That’s 4 months less than the original offer.

In addition, we’re told the City Attorney wants Lindsay to attend another set of AA meetings. And he wants her to do community service. We’re told the prosecutor will let her do the community service in New York City, but — unlike Chris Brown — it must be closely monitored.

The wild card is that the L.A. City Attorney is also involved in the case because they’re handling the jewelry heist case where Lindsay is still on probation. Up to now, we’re told the L.A. City Attorney wanted jail time for the probation violation, but the prosecutor may back off that position.

The plea bargain meeting between prosecutors and Lindsay’s lawyer, Mark Heller is today … so stay tuned.

[From TMZ]

For the love of God. Why does the California legal system bend over backwards (or just bend over) for the Cracken? Why has Lindsay’s legal strategy – of firing a quality attorney, and rejecting reasonable plea deals – paid off? Why is she being rewarded for being a cracked-out drunk driver, a crack thief, a dumbass who endangers innocent lives EVERY SINGLE DAY?

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

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122 Responses to “Lindsay Lohan offered ridiculously generous plea deal with no jail time”

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  1. janie says:

    Anyone surprised? Never ends with her..

    • Aiobhan says:

      I really hate to write this but it will end in a death: hers or some innocent victim that she killed while in one of her episodes. I have grown exhausted reading stories about her and people like her who never had to pay for their bad behavior.

      At this point I am just waiting wake up one day to see a story reporting one of the two stories on this site. Or a sick combination of her in an accident that kills both her and someone else.

  2. ParisPucker says:

    omg her face. looks like an orange VW ran over it.

  3. dorothy says:

    And so it goes, anyone else would have been in jail a long time ago. She will eventually kill someone with her behavior before it’s over.

  4. L says:


    That’s all. Word fails me.

  5. pnnylne says:

    I think she either has dirt on someone high up in the legal chain or someone pulling the strings for her. It makes no sense why this girl is not behind bars.

  6. Lulu says:

    I feel like they really want to help her. It’s a sad but true fact that prisons are the opposite of rehabilitative. JMHO.

    • Mia 4S says:

      Yeah prison did nothing to turn RDJ around…whatever happened to him anyway? ;-)

      Rehab is for those ready to be helped. Plus we all know 60 days (!) will change nothing!

    • Sam says:

      Here’s the thing about rehabilitation in the criminal justice context. Rehab is only advisable when you have an offender who actually displays some potential for rehabilitation. Meaning, they admit fault for what they did, they recognize their problem and they are willing to do whatever it takes to correct the problem. LL has none of these – she still maintains to the end that she’s done nothing wrong, she hasn’t changed any of her behavior, she continues to believe she is victim. Even if jail is solely punitive, that’s what she deserves at this point. She does not show evidence of actually being rehabiltative right now, so why keep providing her the chance? Punitive would work better at this point.

  7. brin says:

    Good luck, Californians….Crackie’s on the loose!

  8. Cool Phosphorescent Shimmer says:

    I have a hard time believing that a deal brokered by Shawn Holley would be worse than a deal brokered by this guy. Why would the DA roll over like that for this joke of a lawyer? It doesn’t make any sense.

  9. aims says:

    The world is on fire!!! Oscar can walk out of jail after killing his girlfriend, and Lindsay can basically do anything she wants, and not do time. Meanwhile, you can’t go ten miles over the speed limit with out the police being all over you.

  10. Sam says:

    So basically, she drove drunk (again) on a crowded freeway, she was speeding, she DID slam into another vehicle that, fortunately, was a truck that was built well and the driver wasn’t injured. She then attempts to blame her assistant and evade responsibility at every turn.

    Seriously, she’s not going to jail until she actually kills another person with her behavior. And frankly, when that happens, I hope that person’s survivors sue the state of California and the departments involved in coddling her for wrongful death, since their repeated coddling of her is what encourages and enables her behavior (not even sure that’s workable, but I’d like to see somebody try).

    It irks me because I work with clients who are poor, disabled, ect. Do I believe for one single second that any of my clients would get such preference? Hell no – the DA would probably be out for their blood. I used to say “they do this because she’s rich” but she’s not even that anymore, really. So what’s with the preference?

    • & says:

      When I worked as a paralegal in criminal defense, we had a client who was disabled and in a wheelchair, in his 80′s, in a nursing home. He was extradited to our county jail for violation of probation. He had been on probation for almost ten years (which is the max in tx), and was not in any way a danger to anyone, yet blohan can commit crime after crime with no consequences. It’s completely ridiculous.

      • Sam says:

        Oh, that doesn’t surprise me. I don’t do criminal law; I mostly focus on business now, but I do a lot of immigration as a volunteer. I’ve seen people put in jail for tiny things (littering, open container in public, etc.). The worst was when a woman we were working for was arrested for disturbing the peace when she ran up and down her street screaming that her boyfriend was abusing her (I usually delt with them because getting arrested can trigger issues with a visa or green card). LL makes a mockery of the justice system, really. I don’t see it as a California issue (because it happens elsewhere too), I see it is a class and money issue.

    • Nikki says:

      I agree. This is just ridiculous at this point. She’s gotten away with thefts, drug possession and DUIs with NO prison time. Anyone else would be rotting away in a penitentiary.

      I’m actually kind of pissed at this.

  11. Macey says:

    I guess Heller’s lucky rabbit foot worked.
    I dont know that I believe this since it came from TMZ. They need to keep LL in their headlines for hits but most of the stuff they report regarding her cases never seem to pan out. I dont doubt she’ll walk but I dont see her doing the rehab thing either.

  12. lucy2 says:

    Not surprised at all. At this point I’m hoping it’s the IRS that gets her.

  13. the original bellaluna says:

    WTF, Santa Monica & LA? Hire some hound dogs to find your balls! UGH.

  14. Sue says:

    Guess they are waiting for her to actually kill someone while drunk driving……

  15. Neekie says:

    That’s one of the first ‘culture shock’ moments I had when moving to Cali. the biggest problem with CA justice system and the culture surrounding it is that they believe the system’s role in society is more for rehabilitating criminals instead of punishing them. You basically have to murder in order to get substantial jail time and even then it’s not much iMO. So wrong.

    Anyway We will never see her in jail so we just have to pray that she doesn’t hurt anybody!

    And yes, I live in CA.

    • bettyrose says:

      Neekie – That actually isn’t true for normal people. Until the very recent overturning of the “three strikes” law in CA – which basically served the prison guard’s union to ensure jobs – a repeat offender – even of non-violent crimes – served mandatory jail time. We have one of the most overcrowded prison systems in the world due to the number of non-violent offenders locked up in CA.

  16. Hannah says:

    Her criminal record is almost enough to turn you into a law and order Republican…

  17. PinkG says:

    It looks like she has cellulite in her face.

  18. Jacqueline says:

    They should put a SCRAM on her for the additional 4 months & watch the crack-excuses ensue

  19. Style Spy says:

    A a a r g h !

    Come on … I was really hoping that she would get her just desserts this time.

  20. janie says:

    She is high in that picture with her attorney. Does anyone think she was required to do drug testing in court that day? Silly me… they don’t test her when they find liquor, smell it on her AFTER she totals yet another car??

  21. SunnySide says:

    Maybe they are sick of dealing with her and are keeping her out of jail for financial and logistical problems? The jails are full enough already and extremely high profile inmates are really hard to deal with because they are targets for other inmates and you have to give the high profile inmates special treatment just so they survive. This leads to extremely high costs and CA is bankrupt.

    Maybe they think if they keep her our of jail long enough she will just OD and be no one’s problem?

    • Marie Antoinette Jr. says:


      And I also think, so many f*ck-ups like Blohan have reached a point by her age where they WANT to do better/get clean/be productive and so they just quit fighting the system. Either that or they run out of money, friends, family who will help them—so they give up and just take their lumps.

      As long as Lindsey keeps getting attention for her criminal behavior, and has a little money and people around her, she has a pay off to continue fighting the system. And she still clearly loves it–the game/thrill of it and the attention it gives her.
      She’s a sick chick.

    • Nina W says:

      The Sheriff does not want her in his jail and I don’t blame him. I don’t know if this story is true or not but I’m positive the Sheriff doesn’t want Lohan on his hands, she is nothing but a headache to him.

  22. Allie May says:

    This is just pathetic. With all these chances she is given you know she won’t straighten up and get her act together. What a shame, I was hoping if she got some jail time it might make a difference and help her to re evaluate where she is going with her life.

  23. Elceibeno says:

    At first I thought they were just giving her enough rope to hang herself but now I am tired of guessing what is going to happen to Lindsey. We are just going to have to accept the fact that she will get another free ‘out of jail’ pass like always.

  24. Lizzie K says:

    She can’t even get a gig in jail.

  25. Babalon says:

    “a dumbass who endangers innocent lives EVERY SINGLE DAY?”

    This annoys the hell out of me. They could at least suspend her DL.

  26. Nicolette says:

    Why does the California legal system bend over backwards for all celebs is the question. So sick of these spoiled brats getting away with anything and everything, it’s enough already. If Crackie can’t obey the laws then throw her stupid ass in jail and teach her a lesson for once. When will it stop? When she kills someone with her stupidity?

  27. Dee Cee says:

    Please all California needs is her constantly demanding attention, bickering, whining, complaining, resulting in prison riot..

  28. Nina says:

    Is it possible that Lohan’s people put this rumor out there? As a means to tell the prosecutors that this plea deal is what she would accept? I realize they could just say as much at the negotiating table but maybe it puts more pressure on people to have it circling out there publicly?

    I don’t know, I am grasping at straws. This plea deal is gross.

  29. ACD says:

    Or maybe she knows about the aliens in Roswell.

    Or maybe they just want her to get killed or die and get done with it.

  30. Hillbillyinthecorner says:

    Hang on to your horses folks this is from TMZ …..not the most reliable source in the world……They do this every time …first she will go to jail for dead sure………….then she will not ……and then again and again…..
    Till that Judge rules on this case I wouldnt’ count on anything coming out…..
    But their is one thing for damn sure when it conserns this Whore….Someone really high up out their is pulling strings and paying off people to keep her ass out of jail….and that rumor about blackmail is just about a sure certainy…..but you know what … really don’t matter ….shes a walking dean whore anyway you look at it…Take a look a really good look at her…..! Is that a picture of good health …a MOVIE STAR you would admire and want to be like…..Hell No ! that is one nasty sick piece of humanity…who has one foot already planted in the Devil’s Den….because he already owns her soul and is about to collect the rest of her……I would not want to be anywhere near her when he does…..
    She really not getting away with anything…not anything at all…..LOL…
    If she walked into a room I was in I would leave and spit at her feet as I go and cross myself for luck…..Most people feel the same way…
    This is Lindsay’s Legacy and their is nothing in the world that she can do to change the pubics opinion …. No body wants to hear her gravel in a buzzsaw voice talking about Not drinking or using drugs. Nobody wants to see her visiting their childs school in motvaional talks they would keep their children home or protest in a picketline outside….and as for her Fondation …..Ha ! that would be busted up by the Feds in 6 mos or less for embezzeling the moneys and for money laundrying..which it would be used for …and Lord knows she and her family have experience in that…

  31. Cecada says:

    I have a theory. It may be a dumb theory, but it’s a theory…

    Maybe the prosecutors on this case took her (growing) tax woes into consideration and thought, why spend the money and the time when the Feds (the IRS) have a better chance of tossing her butt in the hole pretty soon anyway – ?

  32. FassDaActor says:

    Wow!!! Some pp can get away with anything. If it was my brown a$$, I would be under the jail for the 1st offense…that’s if I don’t get shot! Smdh!!!

    The rich & famous got it made.

  33. Cool Phosphorescent Shimmer says:

    One would think the “smelling of booze” thing would make it WORSE for her, not better! C’Mon, TMZ, LA, and World: just stop it!

  34. When she’s dead of an overdose or a car accident (she causes after drinking) Dina is going to sue the California cops and judges all, personally, swearing her kid died because they just let her off again and again. She’ll probably win. Gross. Smh

  35. Sara says:

    Cant imagine what Lindsay will look like in 5 years.

  36. Sandra says:

    I have a cousin who’s Lindsay Lohan without the money (a raging narcissistic asshole with addiction and parental issues)…she’s an absolute nobody (hey, just like Lindsay!) and has been allowed to skate on some fairly major legal issues, both criminal and civil (which is infuriating, because it just is.) Why the preferential treatment, you ask? Because despite her many, many unpleasant “qualities,” my cousin, when it suits her, can turn on the charm like it’s nobody’s business. It’s intoxicating, truly. I suspect there’s something similar going on with Linds up there and the major players in her cases. It’s not until she screws them over time and time again that they realize it was all one big manipulative show, and by then it’s too late and pointless to do anything but just get her the hell out of their faces. Justice served, y’all!

  37. Erin says:

    This makes me so angry. I live in the great state of Michigan (SARCASM) and I can’t even get an ID since my wallet was stolen (along with my drivers’ license) and the Secretary of State informed me my license isn’t suspended, but since I have 3 PARKING TICKETS in one city they will not issue me a new one. EVERYTHING was in my wallet, so I don’t have enough “proof” for the state to issue me a State ID instead of a Driver’s License (which I could get by paying 400$ I don’t have for parking tickets!). This would never happen to Lindsay! Or anyone with 400$, I guess. :(

  38. Sisi says:

    sheesh. Wasn’t this the case where Lilo immediately claimed that alcohol was DIFINITELY NOT involved?

    Take her for her word justice system, give her no rehab, but an actual sentence *eyeroll*

  39. logan says:

    Ah, she is about as useful as a used tampon or yesterdays turd. That includes her acting skills. Everyday I check on my favorite gossip sites and there she is: Lindsay Lohan owes taxes, Lindsay Lohan didn’t show up for deposition, Lindsay Lohan lied to cops, Lindsay Lohan smells of booze, Lindsay Lohan has no place to live, etc. Know what, Lindsay Lohan is just like a lot of other unemployed homeless in this country except she turned to hooking to get by. As for all her trouble with the law, can’t quite figure that out. Entitled b*tch I guess. Someday all those hens will come home to roost. Someday.

  40. Syko says:

    Is it just me, or does her face in the top picture have a strangely Kardashian look to it? Is she turning into a cat face?

  41. Bess says:

    I don’t know if I believe that White Oprah is smart enough to be blackmailing a person wealthy and powerful enough to get LL out of serious jail time. The woman is unable to manage her own life. How can she pull the strings of some big shot?
    Also,if White Oprah and the Cracken are blackmailing some very powerful person then why are the two of them in such financial trouble?

  42. erika says:

    i want to cry….i really do!!! why??? i;m going to go kill someone in california…why not? i’ll get away with it.

    will the irs jail her??

  43. KellyinSeattle says:

    Put a ball and chain on LL and her mom, and throw them on an isolated island; no that’s too good…better to throw them in the hole at jail.

  44. Ginger says:

    Ugh! She has aged so much!! Isn’t she still in her twenties?? Her face looks 20 years older. She really needs a severe reality check.

  45. TXCinderella says:

    This chick will never learn. She thinks she’s invincible, but why would she think any different when they keep giving her chance after chance. She’s one of these people that think they can keep pulling the wool over peoples eyes. I think she is a narcisist.

  46. gg says:

    Hey Lindsay, please drive up and down my ex husband’s street very fast and scare the crap out of him?

  47. Grace says:

    The rumors are probably true. She’s been a call girl to judges, cops, and lawyers so she might also have been passed to politicians too.
    There is no way a b-list actress gets this many passes from law enforcement without a good reason. California is lenient but not that lenient.

  48. rightgrrl says:

    Maybe it has already been said but seriously, she must have something on somebody, somewhere. Why should she change?

  49. Mich says:

    I find it extremely funny that she would be allowed to do her community service in NY. I can’t blame CA for NOT wanting to put itself through that torture again!

  50. JL says:

    Chill fellow Bitchies!

    It’s simply cheaper to let her kill herself than to lock her up, have her get out and then do it over and over for years to come.

    This way she can assult another treatment worker, check herself out, blow off her community service and go ahead and OD …..

    Sad but true.

    • kitkerenina says:

      Assault another treatment worker…

      Hmmm. Wonder how many workers in various walks of life have had the misfortune of being ‘assaulted’ by her, even if only by her presence? Plumbers, morgue technicians, hotel and club security guards, firemen, ambulance workers…

      If only there could be a class action lawsuit.

  51. snappyfish says:

    her head looks like a blimp.

  52. dee says:

    When this accident happened it was reported that she was given sobriety tests at the hospital and had not been drinking.TMZ is just making up stuff as they always do when this cow has a court date approaching. If they predict all possible outcomes they get to say “As TMZ first reported…” and ignore all the wrong predictionsthey made. That said the cow will still probably walk.

    • the original bellaluna says:

      Actually, no she wasn’t. Because that Lifetime black SUV (you remember, the one she was SUPPOSED to be riding in due to the “NO DRIVING” clause in her L&D contract; the one following her?) rushed up and sped her off, any test administered would be rendered void, due to the fact that they could claim she stopped off for a drink “to calm her nerves” on the way to the hospital, or that she took or was given something “to calm her nerves.”

      The Cracken is nothing if not wily.

      • dee says:

        I know she didn’t get one at the scene but she did at the hospital and she had not been drinking. This is how it was reported at any rate. This particularly stuck in my head because she had no reason to even lie in this case but being apparently a pathological condition with her she went ahead and lied anyway thus getting herself in trouble over something that should have been no more than a routine case for the insurance companies the way it is for most people when they get in an accident even if it’s completely their fault.

  53. nancypants says:

    Is it wrong that I’d like to be the JUDGE just this once?

    I would put her in jail -and I don’t care how crowded they are – and put her in an orange jumpsuit and I’d have her ass doing community service for the next 18 months…minimum.

    She would be picking up trash and cutting grass and weeds and planting flowers and doing all kinds of things and yes, the IRS isn’t a group you want to mess with, so, GO ON GIRL!

    Al Capone was pure evil. He did all kinds of evil but the thing that got him thrown into prison was tax evasion.

    I know she’s young and I know she has grown-up hard but someone – and it isn’t going to be California – needs to put the hand down her.

  54. xxx says:

    She’ll never make 60 days in rehab so let’s see what the next offer is lol

  55. G says:

    Well they are letting “lifers” out of CA State prisons because of budget cuts you think they care about this C-U-Next-Tues!

  56. Boromir's Bytch says:

    Don’t understand why she would get a deal for rehab and AA meetings for lying to police about a motor vehicle accident and a violation of probation for theft.

    Why are they offering drug rehab when it’s all non-drug related charges? Isn’t jail time more appropriate for her particular charges?

  57. Ruyana says:

    I’m hoping this is just another example of TMZ’s whip-saw reporting on the Cracken. “She’s going to jail this time.” “Oh, no she’s not.” TMZ does this over and over. I think they whip up the possibility that she really *will* go to jail to get more hits on their site. Until she’s actually before the judge we can only guess.

  58. EscapedConvent says:

    I’ve decided that this is just unexplainable. It defies logic & reason. It’s a Crop Circle–a delusional, menace-to-society drunk-driving Crop Circle.

    I guess the legal system thinks it’s okay to let her go on driving until she kills someone.

  59. gobo says:

    How long before this mess actually takes someone out?

  60. Anna says:

    Truly what this girl needs is a parent. I think the CA courts need to appoint a conservator because clearly the Cracken is too cracked out to do anything but be a danger to the rest of society.

    • kay says:

      Lohan has no money. You have to have money to be in a conservatorship. That is why Britney will be in conservatorship for the rest of her life. She has too much money. The state of CA can’t make Lohan stop her self destructive behaviour and why should they try. They have other more important things to take care of.

  61. dovie says:

    Maybe a petition on should be started. What is the new judge’s name?