It honestly takes a special kind of narcissist to turn a country-wide solar eclipse into hype for your new album. Honestly, we should have seen it coming. This is Taylor Swift, after all. On Friday, Taylor deleted everything from her social media accounts, oh-so-obviously telegraphing that something big was about to happen. Then, as the national media prepared for wall-to-wall eclipse coverage, Taylor Swift dropped her new music video:
Wait, what? That’s the wrong video. Here’s the right one music video:
Honestly, I could see Tay jamming out to that. It’s a banger. We would say that she was culturally appropriating though, because we’re haters. Here’s the real video Taylor dropped just as the eclipse was about to happen on the West Coast:
— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) August 21, 2017
This is a snake. Taylor’s posting snake sh-t to let us know that something’s coming. Kim Kardashian was the one who first called Taylor a snake and Kim really got it stick. Ever since The Receipts of 2016, Taylor and the snake emoji are simpatico. So of course Taylor is trying to turn a negative into a positive, and simply owning the fact that yes, she’s a manipulative snake. If I thought that was her 2017 brand, I would be all for it. But I genuinely feel like we’re going to be in for MONTHS of interviews about how badly she was treated and how Tom Hiddleston and Calvin Harris and Kim Kardashian and Katy Perry all victimized her and traumatized her.
Lainey theorized that Taylor’s new music will be coming out later this week, or that Taylor will suddenly turn up at the VMAs on Sunday with a performance of a new song. Did you guys remember that Katy Perry is hosting this year’s VMAs? And did you remember that the VMAs are airing at the same time as the Game of Thrones finale? While Taylor would love to trump Katy and she would love to be the biggest deal at the VMAs, I think Taylor is self-aware enough to realize that dragons trump snakes. I’m just saying… if I was in Taylor’s position, I would sit out this year’s VMAs and make the album promotion happen on another day. Then again, she did try to make the eclipse all about herself, so anything goes.
Photos courtesy of WENN.