Lindsay Lohan’s life has ended up exactly where we all knew it would: pr0n. Okay it’s actually not the Lindsay Lohan, it’s a cheesy-ass Hustler version for the film “Untrue Hollywood Stories: Lindsay Lohan.” Most of us have been conjecturing that Lohan will eventually land in the pr0n industry – not just because of her drinking, drugging, terrible career (and life) decisions, but because there’s also something about her face. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but she’s got a face made for pr0n. It’ll be a natural transition. But the people at Hustler couldn’t wait for the real deal, so they hired extraordinarily talented pr0n actress Scarlett Fay to walk around in ugly shoes and bright red extensions as a mock Lohan – who has presumably been a very bad girl.

Hot on the heels of the success of 2007’s skin flick hit Lindsay HoHan: Get The [F***] Out Of My Way!, Hustler has hit the market with a Lindsay Lohan [pr0n] spoof of its own. Hustler’s X-rated Untrue Hollywood Stories: Lindsay Lohan features adult film star Scarlett Fay as the sometimes redhead, sometimes bottle blonde former child star, arguably best known for her infamous “Firecrotch.”

Hilarity ensues as “Lindsay” humps her way around a Marilyn Monroe photoshoot and enters and re-enters rehab all with a fedora-fitted Samantha Ronson lookalike in tow. The documentary-style [pr0n] also sees [Lohan] getting advice from frenemy Paris Hilton (played here by Eden Adams), having a slapfight with longtime foe Scarlett Johansson (Nicole Ray), and hooking up with over-the-hill pr0n legend Ron Jeremy.

[From Pop Crunch]

If I were a betting woman, I’d place a good hundred bucks on that last hookup being true. I can absolutely believe that Lohan had a drunken four minutes with Ron Jeremy. That could make even Lindsay examine her life and spend some time in rehab.

Now I know it’s super cliché to make fun of pr0n for the bad acting, but I highly suggest you watch the video clip above. It’s technically safe work in the sense that there’s no sex or real nudity (other than a shot of the bottom quarter of fake Lohan’s butt cheeks), though I’m guessing most bosses won’t appreciate it. But bookmark it. Make it a priority when you get home. I guarandamntee you, hilarity ensues. Because fake Lohan’s delivery is so stiff (how stiff is it?) she makes it look like real Lohan really does deserve her coveted Oscar. And I’ve got to say, I’d think there are few impressions easier to do than a Paris Hilton one, but the actress playing Wonky doesn’t bother to do anything but bleach her hair and accessorize with a little dog.

The actress playing Samantha Ronson looks passably similar, though no one is so spot-on (unlike that uncanny Sarah Palin pr0n impersonator) that you start to feel weird. Overall, it sounds like they did a pretty good job summing up the important parts of Lindsay Lohan: rehab, sex, flashing the paps, bad sex, giving the finger, awkward sex, licking someone in public, upside down sex, and bending in unnatural positions.

Thanks to PopCrunch for the pictures.