Britney had an event-filled few days leading up to Christmas in which she gave us a public lesson on typical bipolar and/or drug addict behavior. You’ve probably heard by now that she decided to pick her next lover from among the paparazzi that swarm around her constantly, and settled on a British guy named Adnan. OK! Magazine has the blow-by-blow, so to speak.

The handsome photographer wasn’t around when Britney decided she wanted to shack up with him on Saturday, so she asked his co-worker to summon him for her. Adnan showed up and hung out with her in the car as they drove around aimlessly for an hour. At one point she got out to take a photo of a mural and then freaked out swearing at photographers for taking pictures of her, throwing her camera on the ground. When one of them retrieved the memory card for her she was all sweetness and light, saying “I love you guys… it’s not like me to get mad at you.”

Britney visited several public restrooms that night, which seems to be evidence of some kind of UTI or drug use. My vote is on drug use since she was seen covering her face and nose. She also changed outfits three times.

Adnan and Britney went to her house, but they didn’t stay there because she told him it was too dirty. He then went to the Pennisula hotel with Britney and came out of the room an hour later to buy cigarettes. He told photographers who quizzed him on what was going on that “It’s hard to make babies when you’re just having lunch.” It was night time at that point, so he must not have meant it literally.

After buying some smokes the guy went back up to the hotel with Britney and left Sunday morning at 10:30 am. He then went to her house, and OK! notes that her kids were scheduled for a visit later that day.

So Britney shacked up with a photographer. She doesn’t really have a lot of suitors to chose from at this point. It seems inevitable that she picked one of the guys who is around her constantly, especially since that restaurant manager didn’t work out.

There’s also a story in this week’s National Enquirer that Britney wasn’t just barred from the Four Seasons - she was personally escorted out by security when she didn’t pack up quick enough:

[Britney] raised so much hell at swanky Four Seasons hotel in BevHills she was summarily ejected from her Presidential Suite and escorted off the posh premises by security guards! Sources say Britney, who’d practically taken up residency at the legendary inn, had been warned repeatedly by management that a Hollywood bigshot in the suite directly below hers - a longtime resident who pays a million bucks-plus per year - was complaining about nighttime parties, loud music and drunken hoochie-momma’s screaming from Brit’s balcony to people below! After visits by security failed to silence Swamp Thang and her brain-fried menagerie, Mr. Angry VIP phoned the hotel manager and threatened to move out. Fed up, the manager phoned Britney and ordered her to vacate the premises immediately. Incredibly, the furious brat refused at first. Snapped the manager: “I’m sending security up NOW! Pack your bags and leave, please.” Finally bowing to the inevitable, Britney packed up and was escorted down the street and out the exit by security.

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, Mike Walker's column, December 31, 2007]

It seems as if Britney tried to return on another night, because outlets were reporting that she was turned away from the Four Seasons and barred from future visits.

And there’s a story that experts feel Britney is at risk for suicide. They probably got the idea from Perez Hilton, who said on The View when asked if he felt guilty for reporting so negatively about celebrities that “If Britney committed suicide tomorrow and died, she would be the only one to blame I think.”

Page Six quoted an “addiction expert” as saying that “[Britney's] going to eventually lose it altogether if she doesn’t get the help she needs.” The expert also says that Britney is seeking attention after her sister got pregnant, taking the focus away from her erratic behavior and calling for even more drastic measures.

Hang in there Britney, all you need to do is start hanging out with your sister again once she starts showing and you’ll get plenty of publicity.

Britney could also take the Paris Hilton route to mass media exposure - she could go to jail. OK! Magazine reports that if Britney misses another deposition in her custody case with K-Fed she could be sent to jail for contempt of court.

Britney is shown out without a bra with her paparazzo hook up this weekend, thanks to WENN.