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I can always appreciate when a tabloid goes against the grain from their endless stream of “Brangelina want another baby” stories and “Brangelina hate each other, will split any minute now” stories. So it is with a tip of my hat (copyright: Stephen Colbert) that I congratulate The National Enquirer for this week’s Brangelina story. Instead of describing how much Brad and Angelina hate each other, and how their split is coming, the Enquirer treats their “split” as a given, and goes on to describe Angelina’s “life after Brad”. So what’s on Angelina’s agenda? She and the kids will be moving to Europe for an “extended stay” and she’s already started the paperwork on another adoption. Something about her brother James Haven too…
Bye Brad – Angelina Jolie is moving on!
After a bitter spat that prompted her and Brad Pitt to pull the plug on their once-committed relationship, she’s packing up for an extended stay in Europe, and will adopt another child, sources say.
“Angie is throwing her energy into building a life apart from Brad,” an insider told The ENQUIRER.
“Angie is already packing her and the kids’ clothes and personal effects for an extended stay in Europe while she and Brad work out child custody arrangements and the financial terms of their split.”
The 34-year-old mother of six is set to begin production soon on the spy thriller The Tourist which will film in Prague and Venice. And she’ll rely on her brother, 36-year-old actor James, to help during the adoption process, said the source.
“Angie’s strategy is to decompress for a while at the couple’s leased estate in southern France,” said the insider.
As The ENQUIRER recently reported, Brad and Angelina’s nearly five-year relationship buckled under months of stress, including a failed suicide attempt by Angelina and a frightening collapse after the 5-foot-7 beauty’s weight dipped to a stick-thin 104 pounds.
In December, after Angelina temporarily kicked the 46-year-old Inglorious Basterds star out of their Los Angeles home because of his boozing, she physically attacked him when he made a cheating confession about ex-wife Jennifer Aniston.
Soon after, during a fight over dinner on Jan. 6 in New York City, Angie rejected Brad’s ultimatum that she seek professional treatment for her emotional demons and physical issues.
“Angelina feels her life with Brad has been toxic. She’s looking forward to a new beginning,” continued the insider.
[From The National Enquirer]
Call me crazy, but I don’t think the whole “going off to Europe with the kids” thing is that insane. Sure, I don’t buy the premise that Brad and Angelina have split, but if they did split, I think it would probably happen like this.
Meanwhile, Los Angeles real estate watchers are noting that Brad Pitt just bought another house - this time a property neighboring his Los Feliz compound. The two-bedroom house apparently comes with a bar and a “secret cave”. Brad spent $1.1 million, and this is not the first time he bought one of his neighbors’ homes. It’s generally considered that Brad wants to buy up his whole neighborhood for one, big, mind-blowing compound. Where he will live alone, without Angelina and the kids, right?
Angelina on the set of ‘Salt’ on December 30, 2009. Credit: CWNY/Fame Pictures. Angelina with Zahara on January 3, 2010. Credit: JDH/WENN.
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt
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31 Responses to “Enquirer: “Angelina’s Life After Brad””
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another Wednesday another week of tabloid bullsh*t. I wonder what the tabs or the haters would do if Brad and Angie split one day….maybe get a life lol
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Wow…thats a refreshing story. completely different from the “last straw” ones.
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Enough of tabloids.
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of course angelina will be in europe, in fact she will be in venice shooting a movie with Depp… Love that is sucha cute pitcure of angelina
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They probably did split or are in the process. I highly doubt they’d make an “official announcement”.
I wouldn’t be too concerned for the “haters”, I’d be more concerned with the folks who emotionally invested themselves in their relationship -I think they’re going to have a much harder time dealing with the breakup than even Brad or Angie.
Egad, once they’ve grasped that it’ll be a good time to tell them the truth about Santa Claus too.
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a suicide attempt??
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I think it’s funny how the Enquirer is “confirming” its own lies!!! At least they are more original than all the other ragmags. No “Jen copies Angelina” for these guys. No sir. They are better than that. They must really pay their writers (I mean “reporters) more so they can come up with stories about Angelina, mother of six small children, trying to kill herself. Now she is “moving on” with all six kids and Brad, their father is not trying to stop her, even though she has “mental problems.” Great story. Can’t wait to read the rest of this serial.
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“I wouldn’t be too concerned for the “haters”, I’d be more concerned with the folks who emotionally invested themselves in their relationship -I think they’re going to have a much harder time dealing with the breakup than even Brad or Angie.”
funny, that’s what I was going to say, too. the haters will say “told you so!” and move on, but I fear for the mental health of the brangeloonies.
not that I think they’re going to break up anytime soon and, for the children’s sake, I hope they don’t, but almost every hollywood couple does.
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While I don’t think they will stay together forever, I don’t buy this story. I swear, the tabloids only have a few ideas for them: adoption, pregnancy, wedding, cheating, and breakup. They just mix and mingle these ideas every few weeks for a new “story”. Ridiculous.
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IF they were to split, the aftermath would probably be like that; it’s a pretty good (fictional) story. The only part I wouldn’t expect is another adoption. A single mom helping her 6 kids through a divorce has a lot on her hands. It’s not the ideal time to expand the brood, even if you are the world’s greatest mother.
That said, I still think the story is bunk.
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If I remember correctly the “suicide attempt” was Angelina saying she would kill herself if Brad left her. I don’t get why people believes these stories. They’ve been breaking up for five years according to tabs. They could be breaking up but everytime a story comes out people believe it as if that the first time it was said. That’s actually more annoying than the stories. Also if Angelina was so homicidal and suicidal why would Brad have no problem staying with her and leaving the kids alone with her?
The haters haven’t moved on from a divorce five years ago. Saying they will move on if Brad and Angelina breakup is laughable. Most relationships end but it’s amusing that people would say “I told you so” if they breakup ten years from now. Besides people were saying they wouldn’t last five weeks nevermind five years.
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Popcorny: So true.
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I guess the whole evening out to celebrate an anniversary went by the wayside pretty quickly. I mean, how many copies can NE sell with an article on a successful relationship.
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I totally believe this story. That couple was doomed from the start, they never should have adopted so soon. No wonder Shiloh and Zahara have been seen with a blankie and sucking their thumbs. I agree, Angelina needs to go to therapy for a while. Vanessa Paradis better watch her man, cause Angie will be flirting a storm with Johnny.
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Haha “secret cave.” Brilliant. That’s the best part about the story.
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Maritza, I sucked my thumb til I was 8. I slept with my blankie til I was 18 and went off to college. My parents are still married (30+ years) and I had a pleasant childhood.
Aside from braces due to an overbite (probably from thumb sucking) I turned out fine.
Blankets and thumb sucking are normal for many children and do not indicate severe emotional distress at home.
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the internationally distributed Angelina custom adoption form:
This adoption is sought on what grounds (check all that apply):
–crumbling relationship
–bad press
–feeling “blah”
–revenge
–benevolent desire to possess others
–nefarious desire to possess others
–void inside
–issues with men
–storyline supplement
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Maritza can you use your skills to tell us why Kingston Rossdale has been seen w/ a pacifier and a blankie. Are Gwen and Gavin splitting too? Ooh I guess my husband and I are splitting up since our 2 (3 and 4 years old) kids suck their thumbs. Their doctor is not overly concerned but I guess I need to make an appointment with a marriage counselor. Thanks Maritza
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I don’t really follow these stories, but can I ask a simple question here?
Is there any actual evidence that they are going to break up?
I mean, real actual confirmed evidence.
I’m just curious if this is the usual tabs making stuff up stuff or if this is based on something real.
Because it seems crazy to just keep making up stories about a couple breaking up just HOPING that they break up.
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Oh man, tabloid Wednesday. Gotta love it.
Outa Touch is running a story that a hotel maid at the Waldorf is “telling all” about Angelina’s supposed affair with some guy behind Brad’s back. The mag said the maid told about finding evidence in the hotel room one night last July.
There’s only one problem with this story: Angelina was nowhere near the Waldorf any night last July. She and Brad and the kids were in Los Angeles all of July and most of August, after which they left for France.
So believe whatever you want. But if you read it in a tabloid, you’d better take it with a bushel of salt, never mind a grain.
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“The two-bedroom house apparently comes with a bar and a “secret cave”. ”
Yes we’re talking about it in a rag magazine, big secret.
Brad Pitt as the new Batman.
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Suri and Violet still suck on baby bottles and pacifiers. How easily some forget when they want to. Children will be children and they do the darndest things. Love the JP family.
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It’s called marketing!
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Secret cave? That’s where the Gerbils of Doom will live.
@javelin, that was pretty funny. I especially like the “feeling blah” option.
I’m one who believes B&A are very good at keeping themselves in the spotlight and working gossip to their advantage, but even I can admit that stories like this are ridiculous and must be annoying.
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Working gossip to their advantage. I have yet to read a positive story about AJ in the tabs in years.
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If it’s true they’re splitting, vanessa paradis better watch out…there’s no doubt angelina will go after johnny depp.
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I mentioned about the blankie and the thumbsucking because this is the first time I’ve ever seen pictures of them doing so. It’s my opinion that they are distressed.
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karma!
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Can you imagine the endless tabloid crap we’ll have to put up with if they ever do split? It will never end!
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Looks like Angelina sucks her thumb! She needs braces for that mouthful!
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I can’t believe this issue about Brad and Jolie. Rumors never stop!
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