I’ve always thought that Jessica Simpson is one of those women who gains and loses weight with a great deal of ease. By most accounts, Jess is very petite, and so an extra ten pounds is really noticeable on her, BUT she can also take it off pretty quickly. That’s just my theory – Jess’s weight seems to fluctuate so much because she’s so small, you notice, and because her diet is constantly in flux. Well, Jess just turned 31 years old – and she gave her boyfriend her credit card and demanded that he give her a fug Birkin for her birthday. Guess what else she got for her b-day? A wonky metabolism! Welcome to your 30s, Jess. You can’t take the weight off as easily as you used to! That’s what Star is claiming this week – that even though Jessica has been working with fraud trainer Tracy Anderson since the spring, Jess is gaining weight back!
She’s not a kid anymore, and now that Jessica Simpson has turned 31, preparing her November wedding to Eric Johnson has made her downright miserable. The problem? Staying in shape is harder than ever, and she’s worried how she’ll look in the wedding gown she’s designing herself.
“Jess is freaking out over her figure. She dropped 20 lbs, this spring but gained 10 back,” a friend tells Star. “Since the beginning of June, she’s been working out two hours a day, six days a week. She’s constantly in a bad mood, nearly starving on a 1,500-calorie-a-day diet, and even admits she’s absolutely miserable instead of filled with happiness and excitement.”
Adds the source, “Poor Jessica, she should be basking in the glow of pre-wedding joy. Instead, she’s stressed to the max.”
[From Star Magazine, print edition]
I think it’s probably a combination of things – slower metabolism in your 30s, plus Jessica could be working out so much she actually gaining weight in muscle. Also: I bet Jessica is still drinking quite a bit, because the girl loves her liquor. That will put on weight and keep it on for a while. That’s one of the reasons I’ve stopped drinking for the past… oh, four months or so. I wanted to see if the liquor was really making a difference in my weight. It was!
Photos courtesy of PCN, Fame & WENN.
I vote the last reason….chica won’t quit the booze.
I’m also one of those gals who gains and loses weight quickly and easily.
I so, so, SO wish Jess would just embrace herself and stop with all the drama. It really doesn’t need to be that way.
@ brin
And with the booze comes the munchies. Oh those nachos smothered in cheese look good!!
But really I hope she has a nice wedding and stops stressing about it (if its possible).
Oh, cry me a d*amn river! Waaaahh! I have no job and time to work out every day, a trainer, and people to prepare healthy food for me, but I’m not losing weight fast enough!! I can spend obscene amounts of money on a wedding dress tailored for my body, hiding or empathizing whichever parts of my figure I want, and I’m still going to fret about how I’ll look.
She’s an overeater, plain and simple. She looks so much better having lost some weight. Her face is much prettier now and she doesn’t have the neck of a linebacker anymore.
Yo-Yo weight loss/gain and yo-yo diets, exercise plans, etc …not to mention the drinking (high calorie content) and the snacking.
@Elizabeth…true, yum!
Rule of thumb, Jess: if you want to lose weight, quit boozing.
What I won’t get, ever: she’s selling shoes for a living, and still can’t seem to find a pair where her toes don’t hang 10.
@Kaiser, I did the same thing. I love beer. Good beer. Expensive beer. Rich, flavorful, colorful, calorie-laden beer. I wasn’t drinking it to get buzzed (I usually only had one or a maximum of two maybe on the weekend); instead I was drinking it slowly to savor the taste. But I was gaining weight and couldn’t work out why, since I wasn’t eating that much. It finally hit me that — duh — beer (and the occasional margarita) is the likely culprit, so I quit drinking except for special occasions. I have to say it made a huge difference. I was bummed, because I really didn’t want to give up my precious beer!
@Jana, “neck of a linebacker” totally cracked me up. Thank you!
Wine and cheese or nuts…oh my gawd, they are a killer. And an ass- grower.
1500 calories for a woman of her height (5’2″?) isn’t starving. I’m the same age, 4 inches taller and breastfeeding (which supposedly burns 300-500 calories a day). I eat 1600 calories a day and work out 5 days a week (2 of them with a personal trainer) and I’ve only lost about 9 lbs in 8 weeks. I have to work very hard to stay slim, due to insulin resistance (which means my metabolism is sh*t). I find it hard to believe that a woman without a metabolic syndrome wouldn’t be able to lose weight rapidly (and keep it off) on that kind of stringent exercise/eating plan. She’s quite obviously eating way more than 1500 calories if she put on 10 lbs working out THAT much.
Give up some of the booze Jessica!
@GeekChic I can relate!
One of my favorite things is a cold cold glass of ale! About a year ago, I gave up drinking it regularly and it made a big difference.
The worst part is that in giving it up, I realized while most people get a “beer belly”, I actually suffer from “beer butt”!
I now relate a sip of ale with an inch of ass. 🙁
Who basks in “pre-wedding joy”? The three months leading up to my wedding were some of the most stressful of my life, and I only had 7 people at my ceremony in my parents’ back yard!
My metabolism is in the can, thank you thyroid. 1500 calories is a feast day! And I am about 8 inches taller than her.
The bigger question, chick is a shoe designer and her freaking weird ass toes are always trying to escape. They look like they are clutching over the edge of her shoes and hanging on for dear life. Surely she could get shoes that fit?
@Tiffany, I feel your pain 🙁
That’s a really pretty picture of her at the top.
I’m 30. When I eat WELL (pretty much Mon-Fri.) and workout (pretty much mon-Fri) I feel and look GREAT! Come Friday NIGHT, Saturday ALL day and Sunday ALL day it goes down the drain. You are right about the drinking, it adds UNNEEDED calories PLUS add the hangover eating and you’re doomed!!
Oh well, you only live once.
She never has cellulite though ………
Gotta be the booze, she’s got the whole soft,doughy look going on.
Who was her trainer for Dukes of Hazard? She needs to get them back ASAP.
i doubt her age has much to do with gaining weight though. She just turned 30..you make it sound like she already qualifies to be living at a nursing home!! In your 30s you are pretty much done with hard partying (going to bars drinking with friends is better than blacking out among strangers anyways), you probably quit or are seriously trying to quit smoking, you are making some money so you feel more motivated to stay healthy and exercise moderately. Now JS has no worries for money, is still drinking her brains out and somehow wants to look healthy…unless she wants to pay for lipo everytime she gains weight she has to actually make lifestyle changes.
woe is me, huh???
she ouht to be afraid of what that wacko Tracey is gonna do to her if she doesn’t reach her goal.
wow, I wonder how much Jess pays her, smdh.
btw im in my 30s and look better than i did before because i’m better at organizing my time now, and actually enjoy exercising. I not longer exercise “to lose weight” but because i feel 10X better all day everyday. If u think that you need to lose weight to look in a certain way for your wedding then you are definitely getting married for the wrong reasons.
Marriage or relationships have nothing to do with how big your reception is or how much your dress costs, if u feel like having a big party, take tons of pics, be the center of the attention and wear a nice dress..do so! but you don’t need to get married, if the party is all u care just have a freaking party and be done with it!
Yes, welcome to the 30’s. I personally, think she looks fantastic. She has such a naturally beautiful face, nice body shape and great personality.
I like Jess, I think she seems quite sweet and harmless. But she needs to read Tom Venuto’s ‘The Body Fat Solution’ and ‘Burn The Fat, Feed The Muscle’. She needs to ditch Tracy Anderson and her no more than 3lb weight, 2+ hours long sessions, and get a good trainer who teaches her to lift heavy and well, in a circuit. That will sort her metabolism issues.
She looks like she stomps around like Godzilla when she walks.
ROFLMAO @ 26. I thought the same thing. Then I have flashes to sexual napalm as John Mayer said. And I think OMG is she ravenous in bed like out too. Gag. Now I am about to kvetch. Poor thing. Until she gets some self esteem and spends time alone deciding who, what and where she needs to be, she is going to be miserable.
i agree about the alcohol.
i have cut WAY back on wine & my ass has shrunken
D-R-A-M-A-T-I-C-A-L-L-Y (thank you Jesus, lol)!!!
with Jess though…i mean being from Texas & all, i don’t think she’s met a piece of fried chicken she hasn’t liked.
i mean i almost eat my plasma watching some mean Texas BBQ cook on Bobby Flay’s ‘Throwdown’ last week!
damn ribs had me salivating so much, i drank some BBQ sauce out the bottle to just calm down.
that Southern food is delish so, can’t really blame her. 😉
I think her problem is that she forgot that you gain a pound for every $1,000 that your Birkin bag costs. She shouldn’t have had rent-a-fiancee Eric ‘Cartman’ Johnson spend $15,000.
I don’t believe she’s working out 2 hours a day, 6 days a week. She still looks chunkier to me in every recent picture I see of her, and she and I have almost identical body types and we’re the same height. I get the impression she just loves to spend her days playing: eating good food, drinking booze, and spending time with her K-Fed Eric Johnson.
I don’t think her problem was ever being fat (although obviously her she did gain, lose, gain, lose weight). THe problem is that when she gained weight, she dressed like she was still skinny. It made her look so much worse. If she would just dress for whatever her size is at the moment she would save a world of hurt (to my eyes!).
Hate how people seemed to think that as soon as you hit 30 your metabolism completely changes. Granted I can’t eat/drink like I did in my teens and early 20s but the change isn’t that much. When I worked as a personal trainer the one thing I noticed is that most people are not honest about the number of calories they consume. Either they truly are miscalculating or they think a handful of M&M here and there won’t do anything. I’m 5 ft 2 and I do agree that just gaining 5 pounds (which happens anytime I go on a week-long vacation) makes me go up a jeans size. I just hope she doesn’t do what so many soon-to-be brides to which is to fast the few days up to the wedding in hopes of losing some weight at the last minute.
@ RHONYC – ROFLMAO! I try to avoid the food channels in my “weak” moments. They had this one on about hamburgers and I swear, I was all fired up to go find the biggest, bestest burger joint in town. (Which, where I live, isn’t saying much.)
And I don’t even like red meat!
Just dress better and all will be well. For example cutoff’s only look really good on teenage girls and if your pockets are showing, it means they are too SHORT…
I remember watching Newlyweds, and she ordered a big thing of pancakes and sausages. Girl snarfed it right down. I think she does have a good metabolism, but being short w/ that appetite isn’t always working in her favor.
i have to say something….”petite” is not the same as “short”. jessica simpson is vertically challenged, but not in any universe, “petite”. that is all.
She is so pretty she should be happy and not worry about it, she looks great
“nearly starving on a 1,500-calorie-a-day diet”
Makes me wonder how many calories she normally consumed daily. When your daily intake is 2500-3000 calories, 1500 WOULD probably make you feel like you’re starving…
A 1500 calorie diet would NOT allow me to lose weight, and I do work out 5 days a week and 2 hours a day. With my metabolism, I have to eat around 1000 calories and ZERO simple carbs and sugar if I want to lose weight.
I’ve been that way since I was 16 – everyone has different metabolisms.
A few times I’ve tried Jen Aniston’s thing of losing 5 pounds in a week by eating 1200 cals a day for 7 days. 1200 really ain’t much, especially by the 3rd day, lord I was hungry. Anyway, 1500 seems near impossible combined w/ 12 hours of exercise a week.
Ah! BLImPY, blimpy…cant’t wait to see your foufrou, ruffled, polka-dotted, frankensteinian wedding dress. Why don’t you invest in a good style advisor and an endocrinologist who gets your thyroid and gland-hormonal profile. It could be booze and hormone imbalances. My hyper thyroid made me lose 40 lbs in 2 months, i was so moody and had a miscarriage. I mean, it’s more than a get thin fast for your wedding scam. Why not taking it easy, take care of yourself first, maybe find the right (employed) man on the way and truky get to where you’re happy. Instead of a horse race to prove “everyone” else you’re a step ahead, cuz we’re not buying it, girl.
Ah! BLImPY, blimpy…cant’t wait to see your foufrou, ruffled, polka-dotted, frankensteinian wedding dress. Why don’t you invest in a good style advisor and an endocrinologist who gets your thyroid and gland-hormonal profile. It could be booze and hormone imbalances. My hyper thyroid made me lose 40 lbs in 2 months, i was so moody and had a miscarriage. I mean, it’s more than a get thin fast for your wedding scam. Why not taking it easy, take care of yourself first, maybe find the right (employed) man on the way and truky get to where you’re happy. Instead of a horse race to prove “everyone” else you’re a step ahead, cuz we’re not buying it, girl.
She is going to gain another 10lbs in comfort food when she finds out Nick got married before her. So now Tony & Nick beat her to the altar.
When is the rent-a-fiance and blondezilla getting married. Or does Eric not want to sign that iron clad pre nup they have been heard arguing about in a lawyers office? hmmmmmm
I love it when this woman talks about her weight! Is she suffering from amnesia again? She’s been abusing her body for years and now there’s big crocodile tears that it’s showing????? Isn’t this the same woman who doesn’t brush her teeth everyday? Next she’ll be crying and confused when all her teeth start falling out…
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