Last weekend, Rihanna tweeted a photo of Chris Brown laying face-down in her bed – Bedhead wrote about it because my mindset is “Maybe if I ignore them, they’ll go away.” Unfortunately, my idea hasn’t worked, because Rihanna posted the above photo last night with the message “i dont wanna leave!!! Killed it tonight baby!!!” I guess she’s straddling his back? Is that what’s happening? I just spent too much time trying to figure out how Chris was positioned here. It doesn’t matter, though. Chris and Rihanna are back together. They’ve been back together for a while. They were fooling around when he was with Karrueche. And Rihanna fought to get him back. Because she’s an idiot.
Still, Rihanna is UNAPOLOGETIC. And it’s Nobodies Business.
But is it as easy as walking away from this situation, to just shake your head and mutter, “Jesus, Rihanna. I’m done with this”? New York Magazine has a thought-provoking piece about the difference between supporting Rihanna and hating Chris Brown. The piece attempts to explain what Rihanna is doing by going back to her abuser, and the pattern that so many abusive relationships follow. It’s interesting, although I think there should be more of an emphasis on making Rihanna (and in a larger view, all young women who are watching Rihanna closely) take responsibility for herself and her actions. It’s not about “nobodies business” – it’s everyone’s business.
Photos courtesy of Rihanna’s Instagram, WENN.
Because of course….she likes everyone to know that CHRIS BROWN AIN’T A HATER LIKE ALL YOU EFFED UP PEOPLE THINK!!!
Because of course…she didn’t learn the first time he beat two horns into her head?
Because of course…she wishes you would all look at her booty.
Because of *course*…he made a mistake y’all. HE IS SORRY THAT YOU ALL CAN’T HANDLE A LITTLE BEAT DOWN TO A LADY WHO DESERVES IT! He loves her and himself equally and as long as that’s present it’s all good.
Because of COURSE…she stands behind Mitt Romney and his views of women.
UGH. RiRi…you fell in love in a hopeless place girl.
Omg your post is on point you are hilarious.
Although i don’t condone what Chris Brown did and I do think he’s just a little punk.. I’m more forgiving since he was barely 20 yrs old when this all happened. Do you really believe he’s going say the right things we want him to.. He’s was still a kid. A rich and spoiled kid at that.. He did his time and if people are so upset,then don’t buy his album or attend his concerts. Obviously that’s not happening or else he wouldn’t have a record deal. Chris B is not going to kill Rihanna when all eyes are on him. So stop being so ridiculous with your assessment. BOTH of them are public figures, not your next door neighbor.
Taking CB back is not hurting her career. She currently has the #1 single and Album in the US right now. I personally wouldn’t take him back but like she said” It’s their Business”.
Diane Lane managed to forgive Josh Brolin for his abuse and there’s not been a peep from them since then. We don’t know what really went down that night she called the police. Maybe it was her body and not face that was pummeled.
@CS, oh dear. Yes, I really do believe that a 20 year old can take responsibility for his own actions. To make excuses for someone who bashed another person’s face in is just pathetic. By age twenty, I was living on my own, working part-time and going to school full-time. If I could handle that, then Chris Brown could stop spewing obscenities and beating women.
But of course I expect him and her to continue to prosper financially. It’s not as if many Americans place a high value on seeking out entertainment that isn’t coarse or tasteless. This is, after all, a country that celebrates the lowest common denominator and rewards it handsomely, all while viewing educated people with suspicion and dislike.
@cs It’s tough to be forgiving of a guy who hasn’t grown up or learned anything since he was 20. Just days ago he pretty much threatened to shit on a woman’s eye. He’s not just a punk anymore, he’s a full-grown misogynist with rage issues. And he has no intention of changing because he wants to believe that all the criticism thrown his way is just other people being jealous. But hey, if she really wants him, then I guess she deserves him. And what does that say about her?
@CS: When I was in Junior High school, no boy there ever hit a girl. If it would have been known a boy did that, he would have been ostracized.
And you think a 20 year old (!!!) can not take responsibility for not just hitting, but totally beating up a woman?
Ridiculous.
I’m shocked when people say he was “just 20” at the time, like that’s some sort of excuse. Have you read the police report? He beat the living daylights out of this woman and tried to strangle her and threatened to kill her, the man was completely out of his mind. That is not normal behavior at any age. I have seen zero improvement from him, he still seems to have serious anger management issues. Scary.
There is no age where this behaviour is negotiable. The only difference between the first blow to one victim and the last blow to another victim is who was alive at the end. No one deserves to be beaten like an animal. It doesn’t make any more sense to me to equivocate that than it does when a politician says rape isn’t rape.
Does youth mean George Huguely beating Yeardley Love to death was negotiable because he was only a senior in university? I don’t know Chris Brown, I don’t know if he’s gotten treatment for his anger issues, but there is no way time or place where giving someone a beatdown is acceptable.
Totally agree. But lost about how this has anything to do with Romney. Did I miss the article about him abusing women? Or even of not respecting them?
Weird.
@Slyceej: Mitt has absolutely backwards views on women’s rights, he would have set us back YEARS. I make the reference because his female supporters clearly turn a blind eye, like RiRi.
Because she’s in Romney Binder full of women
He would have set the whole world years back. Thank god that didn’t happened.
This is a gossip site… Leave your political views out of it.
You know the expression “the eyes are the window to the soul”?…I think Chris Brown’s eyes tell his whole story…he has very evil eyes…always has!!
Are those dirty socks on the couch? Blech, but yeah, these two deserve each other, I’m over it.
Start to feel like this more and more.
Unlike in many abusive relationships, where the man begs, threatens and whines to get a woman back, he got another girlfriend and she still ran after him.
It’s not like she didn’t have the financial resources to be independent of him.
And it seems the only one she’s pissed with is with the public for ‘making’ her leave him.
UGH. I just…GROSS.
*kneels, folds hands* Please, God (Higher Deity) make them go away.
Not pray to go away. Pray for divine intervention to knock the ignorance out of them.
Actually, lets pray that the poster children for domestic violence in young adults actually give teens a lesson on what NOT to do.
As a DV survivor (I made it out alive, with my infant) this is SO offensive to me.
I wish I could shake her and say “DUMBASS!!! IT’S NOT GOING TO GET BETTER!”
But it’s her lesson to learn, and maybe she’ll make it out alive and relatively unscarred.
NOTHING hits home like realising your child will be next. So maybe she’ll have to have a kid or two before she gets it.
@the original bellaluna: I just read the comment wherein you describe your situation. Great job on keeping yourself and your child safe. That must have taken a lot of courage and strength.
I don’t think your situation was very similar to Rihanna’s though. You were in a tough financial situation with a baby. And you still managed to get out, despite him stalking you and tracing you down.
Rihanna on the other hand does have the money to not only get away, but also to have an army of bodyguards and buy an estate surrounded by fences and equiped with the latest safety measures.
CB did not seem to stalk her or threaten her after it happened. In fact, he got another girlfriend. Rihanna still pursued him, while taking racist jabs at said girlfriend online.
With her a big part of it seems a childish teenage rebellion against the public and media, who basically ‘forced’ her to stop seeing him after it happened.
I think those are the reasons people find her idiotic, not because she’s in an abusive relationship she can’t get out of. A situation like yours should only invite sympathy and not scorn, but hers… meh, I’ve found it increasingly harder, especially since her racist tweets.
So please don’t think that all comments aimed at Rihanna are aimed at you too in a way. I think many women who are getting fed up with Rihanna would only admire and sympathize with you.
Huge kudos to you Bella for getting out of the awful situation you were in! That’s amazing, so many women don’t have the strength to, or aren’t able to due to circumstances. And HUGE kudos for getting your baby out of there. I can’t imagine how difficult that was. (I have a three-month old and, like you, would do anything for our little nugget.)
Agnes – Thank you. I was YOUNG. Younger than Ri. And I was on welfare, living in a little pit of an apartment (room) with my baby. But when he threatened to have me killed without a blink and take my little precious boy away, I said (in my head) “F*CK YOU” and did what I had to do (Yes, I hid; I moved; I had a protection order. And yes, he found me, and that order did no good.) to get away from him.
When your abuser/stalker has OTHERS following & looking for you, he’s kinda hard to escape.
But as I said, knowing that my son, my sweet little precious love, WOULD BE NEXT (because they will, you know) made me fight, to keep him safe.
p.s. Notice I said “relatively unscarred” – the scars last a lifetime, even now. (The panic attacks have thankfully subsided. After DECADES.)
pps – There’s no source of pride in staying with someone who hurts you like that. EVER.
🙂 I called my guys little nuggets too! The nug. 😉
@bella: isn’t it simply downright profound what we will do to protect our kids? I have had/still have a hard time with my custody (*celebitchy* fact: I have the same judge Kelly Rutherford has) I’ve been reading your posts for awhile now and your strength *never* ceases to amaze me. As well as your sheer determination to have a happy life now. Inspiration to us all. (And let’s face it, you are among the upper echelon of snarky commentators backed with intelligence.
Little Darling, you just put a smile on my face! Toddles is ripping keys off my laptop like it’s cool (thus the typois), it’s raining like I need an ark (Hello, Noah? Bella on line one.), and I’m just in a total FML moment right now.
So THANK YOU. And you will be O.K. Any parent who pouts (see what I jean with the whole “keyripping off thing?”)_ their child first will be ok. This extra shit is just superfluous.
And I would DIE would for any one my kids. (We don’t even know how far we’d go for a child until we have one. That’s the God’s honest truth.)
I know, it is gross. Can you imagine? Rihanna was all, “here take our picture while I straddle Chris. How does my ass look?”
Though I’m not sure why kaiser says it’s everybody’s business. I agree that it’s more of an opportunity to teach young women to take responsibility for their lives and choices. Maybe that’s how it’s our business? To teach our own sons and daughters to respect themselves and each other?
I wish my mom was as strong as you were. She let us grow up in a home with abuse, and yes, it did start with us from a very young age. I remember witnessing terrible things, and I remember not wanting to get changed at school during gym time because of the belt marks on my back. Until this day my mom is with my dad. When my sister and I were old enough, we toughened up and made ourselves strong enough that we fought back. When my dad raised a fist, we did too. It got to the point where my dad knew that he was getting old, and he could no longer handle the hits he was getting. He got a taste of his own medicine. Now this is not the way to go, but as young teens, still under parental control, and not wanting to be taken from our mother, we only wanted to fight back. I believe my mom is so emotional messed up from this, so disconected from her family and really has no friends, that she does not know where to go and is afraid to leave my dad. Till this day, while he does not hit her anymore (i think he knows the consequences now), he still verbally hurts her. These men will never change.
The type of abuse Chris may give Rihanna may not be physical, but he sure will emotionally dig at her. He’ll play the hard loving game. He’ll hurt her emotionally, make her feel like a princess, bring her down, make her feel special only around him (pushing out her friends and family), and suddenly she’s now dependent on him to make her feel good, and she’ll sit through the verbal abuse and maybe physical abuse again, because she’ll feel like he’s the only one there for her.
Oh, Marisa, I am SO sorry. I’ve a dear friend, and her mother was abused (so were my friend and her siblings, until adulthood, when they finally cut off contact with the man). (Fisticuffs were involved in this situation too.)
That poor woman was married to that awful man for 30+ YEARS. She FINALLY divorced him a few years ago, and she has been living happily since.
And she is a LOVELY woman. But she was raised in a different era (probably like your mom) and things were wrongly different then.
I only did what I did because I believed in my heart of hearts that my infant son would (eventually) be “next” in the chain of abuse, and that knowledge positively undid me. I’m a big girl (ok, I was a teen) and I can take it. But my sweet innocent baby boy? NO WAY. And that’s why I got out, no matter the cost.
And I’ve said it before but it bears repeating: physical abuse does NOT start physically!! The mental, emotional (“nobody else will ever love you; you’re worthless; I mean, LOOK at you; no one will ever love you with another man’s kid”) stuff starts WELL IN ADVANCE of the physical abuse. Once you’re properly beaten down emotionally, and isolated from ANYONE YOU’VE EVER KNOWN OR LOVED…THAT’S when the physical abuse begins. And those sociopathic f*ckers KNOW THAT. It’s their MO; it’s how they operate; they COUNT on that shit.
p.s. I didn’t see myself as “strong” – I was TERRIFIED. I didn’t want to go anywhere. I can’t even explain how I felt, even now, over 20 years later. But I can tell you that the panic attacks eventually subsided (though I do still have to pull over if I see a truck like he drove, or if I see someone who looks like him) and I (and most importantly, my son) am alive.
Marisa- it literally makes me sick to my stomach for you- so sorry.
Bella- it surely hits home to read of your situation . Mine was similar. It is indescribable to explain the sheer terror that is experienced from these a holes. I,too, after so many years, still gasp and give a second glance when I see a black Tahoe. And I’m over 1000 miles away.
Why must she flaunt it in front of everyone. It’s like she is proud of what he did to her. There is not a second thought of the young and impressionable kids out there who idolize her. People like them should not have the opportunity to influence young minds. And yet, she is number one and selling out concerts…it baffles me!
I think she’s proud she took him from another girl. I think that’s exactly what/who she’s flaunting it for.
Yeah but she didn’t really “take” him, did she? He was messing with them both at the same time a month ago, very publically too. It’s only a matter of time before he starts steppin out on her too.
I think any relationship like this could be condoned with the proper amount of guidance, humility, effort to grow, change, learn….CB never really owned up to the severity of his actions. This is why, I think, the public had a hard time. They pretended it didn’t really happen to the severity that it did, both of them. Being open and honest about how getting back together takes trust, forgiveness, therapy, moving forward…that would be nice for the public to see too.
This is disgusting in so many ways. And I don’t need Rihanna’s ass staring at the camera, in my face.
I wash my hands of them. I refuse to read anymore stories about them, no offense Kaiser.
They get off on wallowing in their nasty narcissism.
Kaiser, I don’t know why you’re throwing so much shade at Rihanna and CB.
I mean, seriously- what normal couple doesn’t post pictures of themselves mounting each other in pre-coital positions, for ALL the world to see? I think you’re really being judge-y about two people who obviously lack a pre-frontal cortex. They don’t even share half a cortex combined.
Therefore, they qualify as members of the handicapped class. Kaiser…have a freaking heart, dude! A little sympathy and compassion, huh?
Sheesh. *drips sarcasm from every pore*
HAHAHA. Gen!
She’s not straddling him though. Chris is sitting higher, like on the back of the couch, both his legs are facing forward with his arm between.
RiRi is sitting cross legged or with her legs folded in front her, it seems.
This is by far the best comment I’ve read on this site in a while. **throws confetti at you**
Gen – I bow to you. My Captain Sarcasmo loves you.
BEST. Win.
He’s sitting on the edge of the couch and she’s hugging his side.
Man that was driving me crazy until I figured it out!
It is still driving me crazy. Lol I see what you’re saying but I just can’t see it still ,what is the long thing coming from by her arm down to her lap? It looks like a toy stuffed snake my son has……..this is just so weird on so many levels. 🙁 Gross
THANK YOU! That was driving me nuts. I see it.
Look again. He is sitting on the arm/back of the couch up high. The grey bent thing is his KNEE. She isn’t straddling him, she is squatted on the couch on his feet and he is leaning over and putting his head on her shoulder.
See it now?
That was a puzzle. Also, why is CB sooooo skinny? He is starting to look like Crack Brown or Meth Brown, complete with picked spots on his neck. So gross. Wasn’t he all buff before?
Looks like he’s tying his shoes & sitting on the back of the couch instead of beside him. I can’t see any affection on his part…NONE. I think this pic was a set up between insecure RiRi and her friend just so his ex could see it. He never posts pics of her! It’s all her. Obsessed I think.
I don’t think he’s sitting on the couch. I think the grey is a pillow and he’s standing bent over and shes hugging his neck. You can see that his arm is suporting him and his shoulders are way too high for him to be sitting.
She’s sitting Indian style facing him with a blanket on her lap. He’s sitting on the back and arm of the couch. She reached up and hugged him he’s curled down like someone ducking for cover. 🙂
I love how they keep saying their relationship is nobodies business but yet they keep posting pictures like that for the whole world to see.
I think shes lost her mind. I can see her having a break down like Britney spears did a couple of years ago. As for Chris, I think hes only with her to improve his image.
I was thinking that too, but then I realise it’s classic narcissism… What they’re really saying is “worship me but you’re not allowed to judge me.”
He will do it again its only a matter of time ri ri
Also posted on her instagram was a pic saying, “Home is Where the Cock Is.” Her caption said, “Frankfurt is starting to look like heaumx.” I actually thought that one was grosser because all I could think about was Chris Brown’s dick. Can’t unthink that one.
Are you effin kidding me???
Ugh, these two are pure trash.
Puff!!! Be gone, nope their still there.
This woman is vile. Listening to the radio yesterday and there was a horrible song from a woman who couldn’t sing at all. Guess who.
Miley Cyrus. Just kidding but today there’ s so many
Lol, when I saw this photo earlier and I, too, spent waaayyy too much time looking at it. I think he is facing her and his head/face is nestled into her. But then where are his feet and her other leg!?
Anyway, I try to ignore both of them and usually do but they are obviously back together and want us all to know it sigh. They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Obviously she thinks she has won some prize and he still has severe rage issues. A recipe for disaster if there ever was one. They didn’t address any of their issues and are doomed to repeat the same mistakes. Now it’s this ‘us against the world thing’ they don’t understand our LOVE! Gross.
I also think he is still messing with the other girl when Rihanna isn’t around. It’s such a messy ratchet, situation. She has all the resources in the world to get away from him and his toxic ways but she chooses to stay because she has some of the the same issues.
Yuck. I dislike them both. I just can’t be bothered. If she doesn’t want better for herself then why should I?
I am a survivor of a very violent marriage that I decided to end. No one knew what was going on. I was ashamed of what was happening behind closed doors so I pretended everything was ok. I hid bruises, gashes, etc. EVERYONE KNOWS what happened to this chick and she’s all like “F y’all. This is my bidness.” One would think the peer pressure alone to not go back to someone who beat the tar out of her would be enough to at least TRY to stay away from him.
I’m usually not one to say that entertainers dictate how young people act but she has completely told young girls/women that it’s all good if you get the snot beaten out of you. Just go cry about it to anyone who will listen, get some great supportive people behind you, and then go back to the douche. The next time he goes off on her everyone is going to look at her and say, “so?”
It would be one thing for her to quietly go back to him or to marry Chris Brown and then retire from showbiz (not that I’m saying THAT would be good either, but at least she would be keeping it quiet/private) but her behavior since they got back together has been so celebratory, it’s disgusting. It’s like she’s rubbing it into the face of every abuse victim as a big FU. They are two of the most classless people I’ve ever seen.
And congrats on being a survivor, Jennifer. I’m sure it was tremendously hard but you did it and I hope you can move on without too much residual damage.
She didn’t go cry about it and find supportive people. Pictures of her leaked and she was embarrassed and tried to downplay it. And she would have gone right back to him but PR forced her to leave.
Exactly this! I posted a few articles back that for 7 years I went to such ridiculous lengths to hide everything, and I’ve found *most* women in a DV situation are not particularly proud of going back….whatever the reason is that they do, it’s not something that is celebrated. Many women are very quiet about reestablishing a relationship, regardless how optimistic they are the other person has changed. For me, I finally had the strength to leave when everyone around me went from sympathetic to angry the more times I went back, and the less support I had each time I left made an impact. In their eyes I went from being a victim to being just stupid, and although I know now there was much, much more going on than that, I couldn’t handle being “pitied” or knowing people were sick of trying to help. I know that doesn’t work for many DV survivors, but I do find her behavior offensive. I don’t think I would care as much if they were very private about it, but the public flaunting is really bothersome. So is the coyness of it (i.e. never showing their faces together).
That’s an important new point.
They always say that if you know a DV victim, you should always be as nice as possible and always keep the door open, but never put pressure on them to leave.
But in your case that would have been counter-effective. They’d better stop giving general advice like this and urge people to react differently to different cases.
This girl obvs has major issues. She is headed straight for trainwreck-ville.
Who the hell took this picture? Other people were in the room? I still can’t figure out how he’s positioned.
It just boggles me that she handed someone her phone, posed herself like this, had them take the pic and then posted it. Never mind that it’s Chris Brown, this is a weird thing to post no matter who the ppl are.
Two peas in one nasty-ass pod.
Just a matter of time…
Looks to me like he’s sitting on the arm of the couch with his legs pulled up and she’s giving him an awkward, clingy hug that he is not reciprocating. The only way this picture would be more representative of their general relationship would be if he were grabbing the back of her neck or something.
Anyway, gross. Just gross.
I loathe Chris Brown but tbh, I just feel sorry for Rihanna. I’ve never been in an abusive relationship so I can’t say that I know what it’s like, but she must have really horrible self-esteem if she keeps trying to convince herself (and us?) that he’s any good for her.
Honestly I’m over both Chris and Rihanna they are both attention seeking individuals most of Hollywood is but my main issue is with Rihanna and her team who not only promote this but PROFIT off what happened to her its disgusting, then when someone calls them out its “Nobody’s Business” I’m sorry but when you were crying on 20/20, making songs about the demise of the relationship, on Oprah you made it our business so you can garner sympathy to promote yourself.Notice ever since 09 when her album comes out if taking off her clothes doesn’t get her attention talk about Chris wash rinse REPEAT rant over
I agree with you, SHA. I honestly think she would have disappeared from the music scene if not for being beaten up by Chris Brown. She isn’t a great singer and I don’t think she was that famous beforehand but her popularity increased dramatically afterwards.
Yup everyone thought after umbrella it was over then the scandal happened and if I remember clear she want back to him right after their was so much backlash her on those jet ski as if nothing happened then her team made her leave him and capitalized on the situation that’s why there was so much stories about them they planted it and when her album rated r came out she did 20/20.Now I’m thinking about its like the situation with Taylor swift and how her team used Kanye to further promote her career she was not that big before it happened but overnight she was everywhere.Even though Kanye deserved it
…I don’t even like Rihanna but so much of your statement didn’t make sense.
She had a thriving career after Umbrella and in fact was sort of on the trail to super-stardom. Her and Chris at the time we’re actually considered the black prince and princess of pop music as a couple. The abuse didn’t boost her career.
NOW, she has definitely used it for promo…but that wasn’t to assist a failing career at all.
Same with Taylor Swift. Are you kidding she wasn’t that big before it happened? Come on. It was a big deal BECAUSE she was so big. Everyone knew who she was and even if they didn’t they saw she was just some young woman accepting a trophy when a drunk douchenozzle came and embarrassed himself. That’s like saying Beyonce used Taylor for publicity.
At this point, she’s basically giving the finger to everybody who, after Chris assaulted her, supported her, reached out to her, tried to help her (including her fans, allegedly Jay-Z, her management, everybody). She’s basically saying “I heard what you have to say and I don’t care.”
I know people are often very reluctant to place any blame on a woman for a man’s abusing her. And it’s not Rihanna’s fault that Chris Brown is the way he is. But she can be held responsible for her own actions and her disregard for her own well-being. Its not wrong to call her out for that. Same thing with Hope Solo – she’s getting called out for her stupid decisions, and rightfully so.
I really hope they never have a child together.
It’s cracking me up that everyone is trying to figure out how the f–k he’s sitting on that couch. I think his ass is on the edge and he’s leaning forward and down, right?
Yes! This drove me crazy. He’s sitting on the arm of the couch, leaning forward into her shoulder. That’s his tatted up arm between his knees on the left. She’s hugging his side with his left knee up in her tits.
O.k. I can see that, but what the hell is that snake looking thing that ends on her lap?????? That isn’t a body part that I have ever seen. 😉
Losers. The both of them. Does Rihanna have no clue how pathetic she looks to outside observers? Sad sad sad.
UGH.
And why does she keep posting pics of him with his face covered like we aren’t supposed to know it’s him. I feel sorry for her. This is so messed up.
She might think, she doesn’t deserve better. Or that she is the One who can make him a better person. That girl has issues. I’m just afraid that she won’t reach out for help the next time he lays his hands on her. Probably everyone around her told her to stay away from him and that he is toxic. She thinks she knows better and it’s going to be hard for her to admit (to someone else) that everyone was right and she was wrong. So I guess, she will take a lot before she get’s out of the relationship.
She’s an exhibitionist and he’s a thug. They deserve each other. Their baby may turn out to be a serial killer if they get to keep it. Not looking forward to that.
This chick has issues. She seems depressed and is headed back to her abuser because she thinks that is the only way to feel okay. West Indian culture tends to ignore mental health problems…I hope she eventually gets the help she needs.
Honestly CB has never gotten over how his rep is ruined, I see him behind this publicity blitz about their relationship, trying to drag Rihanna down too because she “deserves it.”
She has the resources to stay away, unlike many who stay or go back, and she chooses to go back. I think it’s a game for her. I think she wants to prove she has control of the situation. He’s a pretty disgusting person, inside and out, yet, she finds him attractive. Hard to wrap one’s head around, and I cringe that so many women still adore him, but…it’s really just going to be up to her to figure it out. And hopefully that won’t be a deathbed revelation. She seems incredibly immature, and I hope she comes out alright in all of this. He can fall off the face of the earth for all I care, though.
I disagree only with the portion about resources being the reason many women don’t leave their abusers.
Many don’t leave because they don’t want to leave, plain and simple. Yes, some have no options…but that is not the case in many instances at all. After hearing and seeing so many abuse stories during the course of volunteering you’d be surprised how many women are safely in the shelter with plans being made for safe transportation out of state or a charity group assisting them who sneak out on their own free will back to their husbands.
Many, in fact, are almost waiting for any kind of reason to return back to their abuser because they are still in love and believe the person will change or needs them.
I think it does a dis-service to the efforts of helping abused women when we disregard their intricacies. We don’t judge when we find those women willingly return (sometimes fight us to leave) we simply keep our arms open and admit abuse changes a person greatly, mentally and physically.
That article has some valid points and I agree with most of it. Like I said on a previous thread about this mess, when Rihana gets tired of the unhealthy situation she will up and leave. Until that happens there’s no reasoning with her.
She must have self esteem issues and that’s something only she can fix. No amount of criticism of him or her relationship with him is going to do any good because in their minds it becomes an us-vs-them situation which only brings more alienation from them and specifically her.
It’s hard to just sit around and watch but it’s the only thing left to do.
I have no respect for Rihanna.
This poor girl is screwed up! I sincerely hope he doesn’t kill her this time.
Something tells me these two are going to be this generation’s Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown… I could be wrong, but I am hoping they never have kids. Whitney did eventually see the light and divorced Bobby, yet she was never able to kick the drug habit. Argh.
Sad that some of the subtler commentary in “Love the Way You Lie” was lost on her.
She had better quit the music industry . It’s believed he beat her because of her popularity . He is a jealous mother f’er and hates that she earns more than him. Either way, I’m done. Won’t read about it again until it’s a death notice. Hopefully she will kill him in self defense .
I think rihanna is maybe just going back to him to reverse the role of how it was before and make him her bitch. Like shell Prolly do her weird s&m sex stuff and whip him so she can be the dom and make him feel what its like to be powerless and humiliated. At least thats what i think…but maybe im just overthinking this and riri just really is suffering from battered woman’s syndrome.
This is the 2000 version of Bobbi and Whitney. We all watched with horror for years as Bobby took Whitney down a horrible path and now, we’ll watch it again. It’s exactly the same situation…
To hell with the both of them.
This stupid bum flompassed bitch aint gonna be satisfied til that walking coloring book stomps her ass gangam style!
Rihanna’s problem is Rihanna. Not haters commenting on photos she makes public, not people’s judgement and jealousy…her. She thinks she’s funny and cute and that she’s revolutionary. Fandom and money at your disposal will do that to you, her head was swollen long before Chris ever molly whopped her!
I bet they reek,they look smelly.
They say Chrianna is gonna be daddy and Stepmommy
I think is is great. These two are just two lowlifes who got lucky and made it big in the music business despite little or no talent. Hopefully they will give us a lot more to talk about in the near future
Seriously, she’s trying to be so brazen and defiant (‘unapologetic’ if you will, pardon all the migraines from all the eye rolling that induced) but in all honesty, the only people she’s defying are people who might have one molecule of concern for her. It’s a bit of a slap in the face. ‘Nobodies business’ my arse, you couldn’t eat the pity publicity up fast enough when it suited you, ungrateful cow.
They deserve each other.
I no longer give a damn about her or what happens to her. The flaunting and taunting online is has taken this to a very nasty place. She’s making her bed, she better be prepared to freaking lie in it when he hits her again.
“I dont wanna leave!!! Killed it tonight baby!!!.” uh… doesn’t it seem like yesterday he almost killed you baby??
The article was illuminating, thanks for posting the link. This part, in particular, hit me hard:
“I would never attack a survivor for forgiveness, that’s part of her healing process…I would never tell someone, ‘You can’t get back with him.’ If that’s what she wants to do, and she feels he’s changed, that’s her choice. And we can’t control her choice, because then we’re no better than he is.”
Sad, but true, and it’s true that no one who hasn’t lived through it can explain it, or even really understand it. That said, it doesn’t mean that I am not explaining her choice to my ten year old daughter so that she understands why I turn off the radio when “Diamonds” comes on…
My position on Rihanna and Chris is they’re both very damaged, very hurt individuals who have their parents and upbringing to thank for how screwed up they are.
I think this is who they are and until either of them takes responsibility they’re going to continue to be train wrecks.
I’m not going to blame Rihanna, though she annoys me and I think she could do better, because when you’re screwed up in the head all the money in the world won’t save you. What I am going to say is I’m tired of her drama.
Until someone’s dead, in the hospital, or arrested I’m no longer invested in this. Nothing I do will help Rihanna and if there’s no one in her life that can motivate her to value herself better then that sucks for her, but it happens. She’s a gravy train to many (her bum best friend Melissa).
My opinion is and always has been it was a mistake to push the image of a survivor of domestic violence on her and try to make her a role-model to others. People always forget strip away the money and these people are usually nothing. She’s no ones role-model and should never have been, at the very most she’s used the title to deflect criticism and attempt to help her music career.
Money has changed the circumstances of Rihanna’s life but it hasn’t changed her from being a statistic. She is a child of abuse who has gone back to her abuser because she believes she loves him and they ‘understand’ each other. Anything she does attempting to get attention and show the world their screwed up relationship is just another sign I need to stop paying attention.
The chick is lonely as hell and her side-show circus has gotten too predictable. Call me if he hits her again. #Rant over.
I don’t get the first pic…it’s bugging me that I can’t tell how Chris is positioned! Other than that…I have no words for these two idiots.
Maybe the next beating will knock some sense into her.
I was about to say something else but I saw your post and, yeah, pretty much. Although I could care less if she gets any sense, I just want her to go away.
Really, do NOT like either of them, so not at all surprised they are back together, both have the same mentality and eventually, their relationship will have another falling out of some sort. So let them do whatever, and learn by their own mistakes. She’s totally smitten with him, even with his abusiveness, and I’m not surprised as this is a young woman who is okay with it. I just don’t think they should come screaming back to the media when things don’t work out, and I don’t think that will happen. She probably is even more thrilled by something she isn’t supposed to have. We really shouldn’t care what they do, but I’m not going to celebrate either of them, both are fairly dumb and clueless in real life.
They deserve each other.
Where the hell are her parents? Her family? So sad.
Let’s just hope these two NEVER breed
OMG, no kidding!
Whitney & Bobby 2.0! I cant wait for thier reality show to drop! Do you think they’ll do the doody bubble thing too? Because to me that spelled true love!
I was in an abusive relationship for a decade, I didn’t leave, because when I asked for help, no one helped me, and they looked down on me. So I stopped asking, and he messed up my self esteem, telling me no one would ever want me. So I stayed. Things would be good, then ok, then violent, then apologetic, then good… It sucked. I lost myself rather quickly. I was not raised to be this girl, but I became her. I was about Rhianna’s age when this all started. I feel for her in a way, I hope she will stop playing with fire and get out before any more real damage is done to her physical and mental self.
When my abuser finally left me, it was like getting out of prison. I felt so free. And then finally I never looked back.
Even though it’s been more than a decade since we split up, I still have issues that crop up now and again. I don’t think when you are in your early 20s you see the long term damage of what you are doing, in anyway.
I only started telling people who didn’t know that it happened in the last couple of years, and they give me such a look, cause I’m a strong, smart, attractive, together woman. Not the typical victim. I can’t stand that look. Or the judging. But at 22-23 without help I had nowhere to go, and so I stayed and years just passed.
Looking back I can’t believe that was me, and the one thing I do know, is it never will be me again.
I hope she gets out soon.
kj, Sweetheart, that’s how it is. Abuse is insidious and vile. It starts with the mental and emotional, and when you’re properly broken down the physical starts.’
I’ve BEEN there;its ugly.
People who haven’t been there (even people who love you) do NOT understand.
Abuse is insidious. It’s sneaky and vile and starts with the emotional.
Once one is properly broken down (no one could ever love you; you’re a mess; you have another man’s child), the physical abuse starts. From there, it’s all downhill.
I commend you for your strength and your ability to see the truth. I wish I could tell you it gets better, but the looking-over-your-shoulder mentality lasts for a LONG time.
It’s been over 20 years for me, and I still have anxiety.
Wow. Thanks for sharing that story. I agree, abuse victims need sympathy, not judgement. If you don’t constantly judge someone for being in an abusive relationship, it makes it easier for them to come to you for help if they decide they need to get out of the relationship.
She is a fool. That is all.
RN said it best (look way up….)
Oh, good. Ike and Tina are back.
Rihanna getting back with Chris is just feeding his ego. He can beat Rihanna and he knows that she will come crawling back hopelessly. She has no self respect.
Actually, she meant to say “Nobody’s Business”. Doesn’t anyone own a dictionary?
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
She clearly doesn’t love herself enough to care, so neither do I. Hope they find happiness together through their dysfunction, because, let me tell you, if he ever puts the beat-down on her again, there will be zero sympathy from my corner of the woods.
She’s fully capable of getting the best therapist out there that money can afford, to see why this is so unhealthy for her.
She chooses to be stubborn, belligerent and think herself so much wiser. This is her life and her choices, though to most everyone else looking in from the outside can see it’s one of the dumbest decisions she could ever make for herself.
She can have at it. I just don’t care.
Well, look at it this way… she spent a couple of years looking for other fellas to date and no one was interested in her brand of needy & crazy. So she want back to the guy who is passionate about (beating) her (up).
This will end in tragedy. Only question is what combination of violence and substance abuse.
Because of course she’s an a**hole.
What is happening to Rihanna’s face? Is it that puffy from booze, munchies, or has she really already succeeded in getting pregnant by Chris?
His model gf is about to melt right down. She’ll never get her caveman back once Rihanna pops out that kid.
I love the Ike and Tina reference!
He’s not laying on his stomach. Look at the skull tattooed forearm on the left. I don’t know how they took this. Dirty socks? Rhianna’s I think.
Maybe she killed him and dismembered his body?
I feel sorry for her. 🙁
Im just waiting for their version of “Proud Mary” do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do…roll en on the river…smack!
When the next beatdown happens—and you all KNOW it will—we’ll all just look at her and say, “Sorry RiRi, it’s nobody’s business but YOURS”. And let her deal with it by herself.
She doesn’t deserve our pity or sympathy; she’s going into this with her eyes wide open.
In German we say “Pack schlägt sich, Pack verträgt sich”. And those two clearly are “Pack” and meant for each other…
No excuse for what Chris Brown did. As a survivor, just because you get yourself out of a bad situation, it doesn’t mean your feelings completely go away. I can still remember the good times and the times even now my abuser has come to me when I needed some support. This year he has been kinder to me than my own family during my unemployment. Let’s hope she isn’t pregnant. She’ll never be away from him. I don’t believe the violence ever goes away. It just simmers. Next time it could be their kids or pets.
I think that Chris Brown has Rihanna brainwashed into thinking that fidelity doesn’t matter, and that it is impossible for busy celebrities…
Oh…and that they will settle down just him and her when they are older….
Rihanna might be a great entertainer, but she is quite an idiot unfortunately. Such a shame that someone so brainless is allowed to be in the spotlights and has become ” a role model”, while she does not even deserve it.
She is a complete IDIOT and I have absolutely no sympathy for her now whatever happens.
Its one thing to forgive someone for abusing you, its quite another to go out of your way publicly at every chance you get to show them how much you WORSHIP them.
Rihanna is 24, and I’m close to her in age. I don’t know anybody in their 20’s who isn’t on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/Foursquare etc. publicizing their personal business, even if it’s illegal, stupid, or both. She’s not different from a lot of other young people in that respect.
Yes, there are a lot of people of ALL ages on Facebook, Twitter, etc. posting stupid pix. Hell I won’t even leave myself out of that category!
But sorry, I do not know of ONE person who would post pix of themselves falling all over (literally) their dbag boyfriend who beats them so badly they end up in the hospital!
These two are the most utterly self-absorbed, vapid, stupid, arrogant people I think I’ve ever heard of. The endless photos, twitter fights, lack of moral balance, saddens me. They both epitomize a sorry level of society that embraces violence, misogyny, fame, money and selfishness over being a better human being.
You can try to rationalize this with the fact that they both come from disturbed backgrounds, but I know many people like them who rose above it all to become wonderful human beings, and didn’t have their money and fame to help.
Do either of these idiots take part in anything remotely charitable? What did they do after hurricane Sandy? Do they EVER think of anything but the needs of their own out-of-control egos? No. They’re both useless wastes of air and space and I really wish they’d just go away because they’re negatively influencing a whole generation of young, impressionable people who emulate and worship their horrible behaviour.
Rihanna won an award for all the charity work she does a couple of years ago and she also helped raise donations to help the victims of hurricane sandy. The media report on all the negative things rihanna does but very rarely show interest in the positive.
Alot of domestic abuse victims go back it’s not unusual..it took the likes of tina turner, pamela anderson and whitney years to leave.
I feel uncomfortable the way people talk about rihanna..would you say the same to abuse victims in the real world who went back to their abusers? i just wish she would realise she deserves so much better.
“would you say the same to abuse victims in the real world who went back to their abusers?”
No, because people ‘in the real world’ don’t tend to pursue their abuser by sending racist tweets about his new girlfriend.
They also don’t tend to flaunt the fact that they got back to a known abuser.
Nor to they have the means to protect themselves like Rihanna does.
She is not straddling him he is simply bent over and she hugs him…
She is not straddling him he is simply bent over and she hugs him
This is sad (and gross to the point of turning my stomach) but I’m not going to demonize Rihanna. She’s obviously exhibiting the textbook behavior of battered and abused women all over the world. As we have seen with multiple celebrities (Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears) being wealthy and famous does not preclude you from having mental issues and engaging in self-destructive and dysfunctional behavior. Everyone is just going to let her live her life and work this out for herself until her relationship with him inevitably hits rock bottom (again). She also grew up in a household with domestic violence…she’s just continuing the dysfunctional cycle of abuse. While I wish she wouldn’t publicize this idiocy, everyone has been wanting to tell everyone else about their personal business for about the past 10 years. She’s no different from any other young woman in that respect. I feel sorry for her and hope that if he hits her again, she has enough self esteem and maturity to walk away.
I don’t blame her for thinking her “love” is strong enough to keep him or hold him down .. Give her a couple of years and age will wise up just like Tina turner and all the rest of us who outgrow that game ..
She’s going to look very foolish in a couple of months .. I think three months to four months is tops for an abuser to “behave ” before they go back to being their normal selves ..