Shailene Woodley: ‘I always think of my life as a pie. My pie is f–king fine’

shailene instyle

True story: I didn’t pay much attention to rise of Shailene Woodley a few years ago, so I barely noticed that she was gone and barely doing any press for the better part of a year. Now that she’s back and promoting the March release of Divergent: Allegiant, I realized that I don’t hate her at all. True, she says dumb things about feminism, and she’s a bit too bark-licking hippie for my personal taste, but she’s sort of daftly harmless. Plus, I love her hair on this InStyle cover. For several years, her hair was WAY too short for her face and it was not very cute. She’s grown out the bad haircut and it’s SUCH an improvement. Here are some highlights from her Instyle cover story:

Her style: “My style is dominated by my desire to be comfortable. Like I never want anything restricting my stomach. I don’t know how people wear jeans so often, because that band is just so tight! I am much stronger in a pair of oxfords and a pair of pants versus a pair of heels and a fancy dress. I’m more of a pants kind of chick.”

She doesn’t pay attention to the haters: “I’ve come to realize it’s really none of our business what other people think about us and the more time and energy we spend obsessing about that, the more we’re trying to be a certain way for other people instead of ourselves.”

She was a nerd in high school: “I think a lot of people would have considered me a nerd. I took AP classes and was part of the pep-rally crew and the leadership council. I had so much spirit that people were probably like, ‘This girl needs to calm herself down.'”

She’s single & okay with it: “I fall in love constantly! But finding someone to share my life with—it’s more difficult to fill those shoes. I’m very curious to see where my life ends up when it comes to partnership. I always think of my life as a pie. My pie is f–king fine. I’ve got the best pie! It’s so delicious. If you want to add some ice cream and s–t on top, you are welcome to join the party, but you don’t get to take a slice of my pie.”

[From E! News]

The pie metaphor is… strained. Her life is a pie and she won’t let anyone eat a slice of her life-pie but they can add to the pie with their own whipped cream and sprinkles and hemp accessories (one would assume). So, does anyone actually get to eat the pie, or does Shailene only get to eat her own pie (I bet her neck gets tired) and she never brings pie around for anyone else? Meaning, she doesn’t contribute to relationships and she expects the dude to sustain the pie? That’s why the pie metaphor hurts me.


Photos courtesy of InStyle.

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27 Responses to “Shailene Woodley: ‘I always think of my life as a pie. My pie is f–king fine’”

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  1. Gina says:

    I forgot who she was. Thought she was Kate Mara. These girls are starting to meld together. Life is good for women in Hollywood as long as you stay white and don’t age past 25.

  2. Birdix says:

    The last photo: “Gah! why didn’t I think of a better metaphor than pie. maybe then they wouldn’t have put me in this dress with a brown dickey.”

  3. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    Oh, I completely forgot about her. I must say, I didn’t miss her or her pie.

  4. Mia4s says:

    She seemed poised to be a big deal for about a minute. She turned out to be a medium deal at best. Sort of…fine…OK…just, there.

  5. Nancy says:

    How is the band on pants any more comfortable than jeans, just wondering. My jeans don’t have a band, makes me think of mom jeans. Secondly, why do all these women insist they were unattractive or nerdy in hs……..and lastly she Is insisting upon attention with the pie metaphor. I know how I took it and had no interest whatsoever. Next…

    • Esmom says:

      I think those were two separate thoughts — she doesn’t like jeans but she prefers pants to dresses.

  6. lower-case deb says:

    pie with sh-t on top?

    but you do you, Shailene.

    anyway, has she been under the radar a lot this past year? or has Celebitchy been covering less of news regarding her?

  7. platypus says:

    Maybe not the best metaphor, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad message. Most of her fans are young girls who would probably be more inclined to believe no guy would even want a slice of their pie unless they do x, y and z. Now, that’s a harder mindset to snap out of.

  8. Bob says:

    Ah, Divergent promotional season. I look forward to seeing how Theo James is holding up under the reality of filming Divergent3/Underworld5/Divergent4. Hang in there, pretty boy!

  9. Farhi says:

    “I’ve come to realize it’s really none of our business what other people think about us and the more time and energy we spend obsessing about that, the more we’re trying to be a certain way for other people instead of ourselves.””

    I agree with that 100%. Now I am a bit worried I am agreeing with Shailene on something . Oh, well. I guess I am a bit of hipster at heart.

    I actually get the pie comparison too – you have to make yourself happy to be happy. Other people can come and go, add to your happiness or not, but they can’t take it away and they can’t make you happy and fulfilled, you already have to be happy and fulfilled.

    And I also don’t like jeans. Too tight.

    • Esmom says:

      I found myself surprised by agreeing with most of what she said, too. But the pie metaphor doesn’t really work for me, the way you phrased it is much better.

      She looks really lovely on the cover — hair, skin, makeup, styling.

    • Emily C. says:

      Yep, I came to what you quoted and thought jeez, wish I’d realized that at her age. It’s totally true.

  10. zinjojo says:

    That last Divergent book, Allegiant was so bad I couldn’t even hate read it to finish. It was boring and so tedious.

    And it’s going to be two movies? Insurgent under performed vs the first one and I think this film series will continue to decline. It has a fan base, but nothing like Hunger Games, and doesn’t have a good story going for it. But of course, Theo James is nice to look at.

    • Farhi says:

      Divergent series is a fairly rare case where the movies are better than the books. The books are atrocious. The plot is OK but the writing is horrible. The first book was tolerable but I couldn’t read 2nd and 3rd books, the writing was so bad. There are teenagers who write better.

  11. Josefina says:

    I don’t hate Shailene either. She’s pretty stupid, but very talented. She should stick to indie movies and little press. Hollywood is just not for her.

  12. tealily says:

    Aw, bless her. I like the pie metaphor.

    • Pandy says:

      I think she’s more interesting that 95% of her peers. I get the pie metaphor – I use cake. My life is a cake and a happy relationship is the frosting on top. But the cake is the reason for the frosting of course … Or am I making this totally mucked up???

      • Iampunka says:

        The problem with the metaphor is that if you are looking for a partner in life, as she claims she was, then you are going to have to share your pie (or cake) with them. That is what a true partnership is. You both share yourself with the other.

        So if she isn’t willing to share that part of herself, she’ll never find a true partnership. Which is selfish as hell. Especially when you want them to add topping your pie, but they don’t get any.

  13. kri says:

    I couldn’t stand her when she wouldn’t stop barking about sunning her vadge in the forest, I’m sure as hell not here for her pie metaphors or whatever. Get out of my face with your pie, Woodchuck.

  14. wow says:

    I use to like her. They always have so much promise of being likeable in the begining (a la Jennifer Lawrence)Then they start to talk…and talk…AND TALK until their likeability wears off to me. That’s where she is with me. Although I do wish a lot of famous people took on her mindset on handling “the haters”. There’d be less Kanye type twitter tirades if they did.

    • OTHER RENEE says:

      They talk because journalists keep asking them questions. And we as consumers of pop culture keep reading what they say. Imagine how it would all be so different if no one asked them anything and we focused solely on their acting (singing etc.)

      I personally like her, think she’s cute and very talented. Way better than JLawrence peeing in a sink. (Still can’t get beyond that.)

  15. Tania says:

    Ugh, I had read somewhere that she didn’t wash her hair anymore and that her stylists had a hard time getting clothes for her because they would stink when she gave them back, and now that is all I can think of when I look at her. It doesn’t help that her hair looks greasy in the photo.