Anthony Hopkins: ‘I’m not cold’ about being estranged from my daughter

Sir Anthony Hopkins on the film set of 'Transformers: The Last Knight'

Anthony Hopkins recently gave an interview which read as extremely icy. I have no idea if Hopkins is an icy person in real life, but the interview definitely came as a surprise. You see, Hopkins only has one biological child, an adult daughter named Abigail Harrison. She was raised in England (presumably) while he traveled for work and then made his home in America. They didn’t have much to do with each other during her childhood, but they attempted to have some kind of reconciliation at some point, only for it all to end in an even deeper estrangement. And so that’s where the coldness came in – Hopkins was asked in the interview about his daughter and whether he has any grandchildren. He said he didn’t know if he has any grandkids because he and Abigail don’t speak and “I don’t care one way or the other. It is cold. Because life is cold.” Harsh. Well, Hopkins is defending his iciness:

He recently opened up about his fractured and acrimonious relationship with daughter Abigail Harrison. And now Sir Anthony Hopkins, 80, has defended his comments in which he said he didn’t know if his only child has kids and didn’t care ‘one way or the another’.

Speaking to The Times, he insisted that his remarks weren’t ‘cold’ but rather he’s learned to live with his daughter’s decision to not be apart of his life. He began: ‘No, I wasn’t cold. I’m not cold. Her choice is her choice. You know, I did the best I could, but you know, OK, I think if somebody doesn’t want to be part of my life, fine. Go and do whatever you want. I have no memories or any… I certainly don’t… I wish her well and all that, but I don’t want to talk about my daughter. Those things are over.’

Adding: ‘I’ve got no blame. People do what they do. And I don’t understand it and it doesn’t bother me. I can’t waste my time worrying about it. And I’m not cold, I’m just thinking, “Oh well, that’s the way it is.”‘

[From The Daily Mail]

I assumed as much, that it was Abigail’s choice to cut her father out of her life and he simply respects that and tries to put her out of his mind. In the current age of touchy-feely modern-parenting, it can feel and look odd, but let’s be real: there are thousands (if not millions) of people who are estranged (in varying degrees) from their parents or from one parent. And yes, Hopkins does sound cold and he does seem very icy about it. But then… what else can he do? I give him credit for respecting his daughter’s boundaries, as odd as that sounds.

Sir Anthony Hopkins

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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24 Responses to “Anthony Hopkins: ‘I’m not cold’ about being estranged from my daughter”

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  1. CTgirl says:

    He can come across as soul-less.

  2. Yes Doubtful says:

    I disagree. I think what he said was a dig toward her. He could have just said they are estranged but he wishes her well. He didn’t have to add the “I don’t care” part.

    • tracking says:

      Yeah, still sounding damn cold to me.

    • Anne says:

      Maybe slightly. It might not even be intended as a dig. But regardless, I don’t think the daughter cares what he thinks about her life, so it’s all kind of moot anyways.

    • Sabrine says:

      This is between him and his daughter. We really don’t need to be sticking our noses in his personal business, although granted it was him who started it with his comment. Was it the aspergers talking?

    • Bread and Circuses says:

      It sounded to me like his feelings are still hurt about it, and as gracious as he knows he should try to act about it all, it still smarts and he still snaps back about it, just a little.

  3. LondonGal says:

    He strikes me as a very very difficult man.

    • swedish chef says:

      He has aspergers. By definition that means he doesn’t have the same social instincts as most people, so he could come across as difficult. Could go a long way in explaining his estrangement from his daughter.

      • Giddy says:

        Wow. That explains a lot. My brother has aspergers and is a CPA and great at his job. My sweet sister in law says he likes spreadsheets more than he does most people. He was not diagnosed until he was an adult, but I learned when I was young not to do things like run up and hug him. Instead, I waited for a certain look in his eyes that gave me permission. His children adore him and know that he loves them deeply, but it’s a quiet and private love, so to others he can seem distant. Knowing Hopkins has Aspergers puts a different slant on his remarks.

      • Carrie1 says:

        Thanks for this. I wasn’t clear on if he had anything to contribute.

  4. Lala says:

    Please…stop talking about this subject matter Sir Hopkins…FOR THE LOVE OF GAWD…JUST STAHP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    One of my favorite lines out of a movie “Ricki and the Flash” was when Rick Springfield (who can act his TAILFEATHER OFF…which of course I knew from all those years on GH) told Meryl’s trifling character that …it’s not our childrens’ job to love and understand their parents…it’s the parents’ job to love and understand their kids…

    I get that…I TRULY get that…

    • Helen Smith says:

      Amen LALA. 🙏🏻

      I wish you could get that comment through to my narcissistic parents. Hey, mom and dad! My brother and I weren’t born to act as walking mirrors so my two lunatics can enjoy your reflections. We’re flesh and blood human beings with our own minds and lives to live!

      • Lala says:

        Girl…I OVERSTAND! That is me and my Mama…and I’m too old…and don’t have the energy for it anymore!!! LOL!!!!

    • Rachel Phelps says:

      Holy crap, Lala, you just blew the lid off of my extremely dysfunctional childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood with my parents. I am going to marinate on this in a positive way for a long time to come. Thank you for giving me that healing.

    • Shirurusu says:

      Yes I agree! It’s a very good way of putting it. I’ve been estranged from my dad on and off since I was little because he pretty much came and went as he pleased and cared mostly about himself and his own career (he wasn’t with my mom). Now that I’m older I have more distance to it but it was very hard growing up, and realising that he simply didn’t care, or didn’t even know how to care. I think he is a bit emotionally stunted and doesn’t even understand what he did wrong, so I can relate to Anthony Hopkins weird comments, my dad could probably have said something simliar. What, me??? I’m supposed to be the grown up??? Lol

  5. Iknowwhatboyslike says:

    My husband and I have been estranged from both of our fathers. I have been going back and forth on whether I should speak to mine because I’m sad that i’ve never had a good relationship with mine. My husband has had a very cold response to his father, which is, he’s never been a father to him and he’s not going to be. He’s a 41 year old man with his own family and he could careless. If his dad calls him he’ll talk, but it is what it is. There is no wishing for things to be different or hope to make amends. At times I admire him for his ability to be done.

  6. Mousy B says:

    He literally said “its cold” in his original interview so he needs to own up to what he said. Also from my understanding they have an icy relationship because he wasnt around during her childhood and by the time they tried to start over it was too late – hes saying “her choice” etc but it seems like its his fault for being a shit dad to begin with…

  7. Snap Happy says:

    It’s noy his fault? BS. he’s the father

  8. Jussie says:

    He deserves flak for being such a terrible father, but now that the damage is done and his daughter wants nothing to do with him, this is honestly the best way to handle it.

    Most cut-off parents throw themselves an endless, bitter pity-party, and take every opportunity to try and force themselves back into their children’s lives in one way or another. Hopkins sounds cold saying he’s fine with it, but it’s the far better option to clinging on and trying to guilt your way back into your child’s life.

  9. Sarah says:

    Welsh men are broody and moody!

    • Grumpy says:

      Yes, I have a cold Welsh father myself and when I read about Hopkins it all seems familiar! To escape a post war Welsh working class background you would have to be pretty hard.

  10. Snappyfish says:

    Families are bloody. I think we all want them to be warm & fuzzy. I guess that is why they say you come from one family and then form the one you wish for.

  11. Freida says:

    I’m pretty sure Sir Tony is a longtime member of a 12-step program, and if so, believes, “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Accepting his daughter’s choices and decisions and moving forward from a situation that can’t be changed would be something he must do to protect his sobriety.

  12. serena says:

    I highly doubt he’s got ‘no blame’.