Demi Lovato’s ex Wilmer Valderrama ‘has spent hours at the hospital every day’

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In the wake of Demi Lovato’s shocking overdose and hospitalization, there were conflicting reports about whether she was going to go to rehab. Some outlets reported it like it was a done deal, but then People claimed claimed that her family was pushing for rehab, with the subtext being that she wasn’t on board. (This is my interpretation.) There are other reports that she’s looking into facilities outside LA. Demi previously went to rehab at the age of 18 after a family intervention. That was in early 2011, and she’s admitted that she didn’t get sober until March 2012, that her family staged several interventions for her, and that her inspiration was her sister, who is now 16. She revealed this in an interview last October, where she said that “every day is a battle” and that “you just have to take it one day at a time.”

Demi first dated Wilmer Valderrama when she was 17 and he was 29. They broke up in June, 2016, after a supposed six years together but they were on and off multiple times. This spring they were seen together having lunch and looking very morning after, with reports claiming that they could get back together. We haven’t heard anything about them in a handful of months so I assume that the latest go around didn’t work out. Whatever happened between them, Wilmer has been supportive. Wilmer has rushed to Demi’s side and has been in the hospital visiting her for hours every day.

Demi Lovato is getting strong support from her family and ex-boyfriend Wilmer Valderrama as she recovers from her apparent overdose.

“She’s resting and getting better in the hospital,” a source tells PEOPLE. “Her whole family and Wilmer are just there to support her through recovery.”

“Wilmer has spent hours at the hospital with Demi every day,” says a second source. “He seems very concerned about her.”

Valderrama rushed to Lovato’s side on Wednesday after initially being very “shocked” by the news, a source close to the former couple previously told PEOPLE.

The 38-year-old actor, who dated the singer for six years before their split in June 2016, has visited Cedars-Sinai multiple times since Tuesday morning, when Lovato was transported to the hospital following an apparent overdose that occurred at her Hollywood Hills home. Valderrama was seen visiting Lovato again on Thursday, when a photo of him at the hospital emerged.

[From People]

Someone who better understands codependency can surely explain this better than I can. I don’t think Wilmer is healthy for Demi and that’s all I’m going to say about that. Hopefully Demi can get sober for herself and can stay that way and hopefully she can avoid the pitfalls that lead her to this latest relapse.

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34 Responses to “Demi Lovato’s ex Wilmer Valderrama ‘has spent hours at the hospital every day’”

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  1. Croatian says:

    You never know. Maybe he is the only person who can get her into rehab, maybe he is the healthiest person for her.
    We don’t know her or him, do we :-/

    • laulau says:

      she definitely shouldn’t be dating for a while. After watching her documentary it felt like she was headed this way, partially because of the way she talked about dating.

      Wilmer is pretty dreamy these days tho.

    • Marianne says:

      Like I get that Wilmer has a douche-y vibe for dating young popstars…but have we thought that maybe she wasn’t good for him? I mean if she was struggling to stay sober that might have been hard on him.

  2. Toc says:

    I think he is using her overdose for good PR.

    • MerrymerrymonthofMay says:

      It sure sounds that way to me

    • Nancy says:

      Yep. It seems very Khloe Kardashian holding vigil for Lamar in hospital. Oops, that was the first six episodes of Season 10. In other words, nice way to get headlines, using a person’s downfall to get ink.

    • Swackd says:

      Why would he need PR? Just asking because he is on the number 1 rated tv show NCIS.

      • Nancy says:

        He is on that show now? Can’t imagine DiNozzo is pleased with that! Then again, I haven’t watched the show since Ari killed Kate, but my parents do I think!!

    • Lizzie says:

      I think so too. He’s always latching I’m to his ex’s when they are in the news – good or bad. Also – Why is she still in the hospital?

      • OriginalLala says:

        i was wondering why she was still hospitalized as well. I wonder if the OD caused other damage to her body

    • sara says:

      I was thinking the same thing. It’s disgusting to use this woman’s suffering to try and make himself relevant again.

      • BrutalEthyl says:

        I think you have to have been relevant to become relevant again. Fez here was known, but not necessarily relevant. Unless you consider being a man whore as relevant, I honestly can’t think of any point in time when he was anything more than a hanger on.

        But yeah, I totally agree that he’s using this opportunity to get his face in the media again. I wish he’d go away.

  3. ichsi says:

    I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s the one who got her hooked. This is so sad.

    • Valiantly Varnished says:

      That’s a big allegation to throw at someone. Especially considering that Demi herself said she started drinking and using drugs as early as 14. You cant blame other people for someone’s addiction. That’s not how it works.

      • Tashiro says:

        Agreed. Also to say it’s just PR is pretty lousy too. Your saying because a person is a celebrity they can’t have genuine feelings about someone or a situation that’s ridiculous.

    • sara says:

      @Tashiro – when a “source” talks to People Magazine, it is that celebrity’s publicist. So yes, it is awful that he’s using her disease for publicity. If he truly cared, he’d be there for her in private, not blabbing to a tabloid to make himself look great.

      • Nancy says:

        That was my point above re Kardashian/Odom. When you do things in love, you do them in private. If he feels the need for all of us to know he was there, it feels disingenuous. I don’t think he is a good influence on her, just a gut feeling.

      • Jesma says:

        You must be forgetting all the people that work at a hospital. If he is there every day then he is being seen by guards, aides, nurses, and doctors. Many gossip sites, like TMZ for example, pay court and hospital staff for information on celebrities.

    • jwoolman says:

      Demi was doing drugs before she dated Wilmer.

  4. Valiantly Varnished says:

    My take on this is that Demi relies on Wilmer to help her stay sober. And when he’s not around she has a hard time coping and making good choices for herself. It’s classic co-dependence. So while I don’t think Wilmer is “bad” for her, I do think she won’t be able to stay sober and know that she is strong enough to do so on her own until she is actually on her own and utilizes the tools that rehab teaches to make the right choices.

    • Sherry says:

      I wish I could remember where I read this, but right after this OD, one of her friends (“sources”) ran to the tabloids saying whenever she’s not with Wilmer, she can’t handle being alone and starts using again. The whole tone of the article seemed to blame him because he broke up with Demi and that it was his fault for not staying with her. It was like they were saying, “If Wilmer would just stay with her, she wouldn’t be using again. This is all his fault for dumping her.”

      That was my takeaway from the article and I thought it was very unfair to Wilmer. I don’t like him, but he should not be shamed into staying with Demi because she might go back to using if he’s not there.

  5. Jessica says:

    The story I have always heard is that Wilmer kept her clean, that it was basically a relationship dynamic in which she was heavily dependent on him in that sense (unsurprising). I don’t like that he got with a 17 year old when he was 29 and it’s definitely sketchy (he has a history), but he’s never been implicated in her drug problems afaik. Demi’s dad was an addict and her mom is an enabler and a stage mom.

  6. Gigi LaMoore says:

    Hmm…who would be good for her to be around? I just read an article where her mom said that since Demi was a teen, it has been hard to step in due to the fact she is the one paying the bills. That’s sad. Say what you want about the Spears, but those people stepped in and saved their daughter’s life. They put aside the possibility of being cut off and the embarrassment and possibility of hurting Brittney’s career by seeking legal means. That’s the family I would want in my corner.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      “Say what you want about the Spears, but those people stepped in and saved their daughter’s life.”

      From what I understand, you have to clear a very high bar to put someone under conservatorship like hers. Britney’s rights to her own care have been removed, and that is such a serious consequence. It’s not enough to be an addict or have a mental illness. It has to be extremely severe.

      • Gigi LaMoore says:

        My point is that they tried. It could have been denied. We know that Demi has problems in addition to drug abuse. It is likely that she is not bad enough for a conservatorship, but even if she were, is a parent who is more concerned with her bills being paid going to pursue that route?

  7. HelloSunshine says:

    Can anyone fill me in on the family dynamic here? I saw above that dads a drug addict and mom is a stage mom, so I’m assuming Demi is the breadwinner and her family solely relies on her for income, housing, etc.? That’s a lot of pressure for someone with addiction and mental health issues imo.

    Also agree with several people above that Demi relies on Wilmer for sobriety. My best guess is that he’s one of those knight in shining armor people that likes having someone to take care of/someone that is “broken” in his opinion and she keeps herself in check to align with that.

    • Léna says:

      Her dad died a few years ago, that’s all I know.

    • otaku fairy... says:

      Both of her parents had addiction and mental health issues, the relationship was abusive at some point, and Demi’s older sister had addiction issues too.

  8. Socks says:

    It doesn’t sound like she wants to get sober. The only person that can decide that is her, until then she will never be fully sober. It’s so hard to get and stay sober when you are so young.

  9. Originaluna says:

    While i understand the sketchyness of his relationship with her when she was barely legal she has admitted publicly that he helped her a great deal with getting sober -at the time.
    That alone proves he can’t be that bad and that he did care and looked out for her. But he is not forced to be with her forever so she stays sober. However i can understand him feeling like he needs to be by her side when he “knows” how to help her to crawl out of that hole. Doesnt mean he will date her again just for that reason but maybe it means he’s human and when he felt she needed him he decided to show up and be there.
    Thats compassion if you ask me. And caring.
    And so what if his publicist went to the press? Sometimes publicists just see an opening to put their client out there in the news cycle and run with it. Doesnt mean hes angling for a movie role? He’s dated her for 6 years. You can’t date someone for 6 years and try to use their tragedy because u want to be on a magazine cover for 5minutes. I think we are projecting our perception of who he is or was – sketchy, creep, womanizer etc, and not seeing that this is a man who is there for his ex.
    Even with Khloe. She monetized her drama with Lamar yes, but in the end she saved his life by staying married to him for 5more minutes to ensure he was taken care of. She could have saved herself that situation and just filmed 10 episodes being depressed at home and playing the victim.
    I think we sometimes forget these people are human. Even if they do ridiculous things.
    Hell. If my life was scrutinized like that of celebs im pretty sure i would be seen as a jerk for some of the stuff i did in my 20s. And today sometimes.

  10. Silent Star says:

    I hope that this hospital stay is only to monitor her, and to just really be thorough in setting up her supports before her release…because sadly the only other reason I can see is if she suffered brain damage. :(

  11. Rebecca says:

    I dated a man who was 25 when I was 17. It didn’t turn out well. I think there are certain men who think it is easier to manipulate a woman (or a girl) when she is young. I don’t like that a 29 year old dated a 17 year old. There is plenty of other women his age he could have dated. It’s possible he could be an exception, I guess. I don’t know him. She did seem to remain sober when she dated him. However, as a parent, I would be really suspicious of any 29 year old who wanted to date my 17 year old daughter. Somethings not right.