Back in 2019, the British media whined, cried, screamed and wailed over the fact that the Duchess of Sussex traveled to New York for several days of rest, relaxation and a baby shower. Amal Clooney gave Meghan a ride to New York on a private plane, and Meghan’s friends gathered at a hotel for several days to have spa treatments, lunches, flower-arranging classes, etc. It was just girl-time, and as we now know, Meghan was going through an extremely tough time in those months, and had basically been suicidal because of all of the toxic abuse she had been subjected to for months. But for the British papers, in that moment, it was yet another storyline to rip Meghan to shreds. Well… is Meghan going to have a baby shower for Lil’ Montecito?
Perfect priorities! Pregnant Meghan Markle has decided not to have a baby shower — and for the best reason.
“Meghan doesn’t feel a big baby shower with gifts is appropriate right now,” a source exclusively reveals in the new issue of Us Weekly. “There is too much strife in the world. She and Harry have been so involved with humanitarian issues, they both feel their time and resources can be used for a better purpose.”
The insider adds that the Suits alum, 39, “has the support of her friends and, most importantly,” her husband, Prince Harry. “Harry is the ideal partner, taking care of Archie and working to provide for his family,” the source says.
Whenever I cover celebrity baby showers, I’m surprised by how many unwritten rules there are about baby showers in general. Like, it’s apparently pretty gauche to do big baby showers for your second or third child. You’re not supposed to ask for a lot of stuff after the first child. And for celebrities, it seems like baby showers are more like “ladies’ lunches” with gifts for the guests and all of that. Anyway, I’m not really surprised that Meghan isn’t jazzed about a baby shower at the moment because we are still dealing with a pandemic and people probably don’t want to fly in just for a baby shower. Along with the other stuff, Meghan feels like now is not the moment. Of course, the thing about the Montecito royals is that “royal sources” don’t know what the hell the Sussexes are up to. Meghan could totally have a baby shower and the British tabloids would never find out.
Photos courtesy of Backgrid.
Baby showers are completely and utterly non-existent in Croatia, they are considered something a Goop would do 😀 I’m not saying I agree, it’s just funny to me how differently we think!
My mom’s family, Irish-American, won’t do baby showers and won’t attend them for “reasons.” They wait until the child is born and then celebrate.
My mother told me that her mother used to say that it was bad luck to celebrate before the baby was born, that you’re tempting fate. I can see where people would get that. I never had any kids but can only imagine the pain of prepping for something that you lose before you get it. It’s like that shortest sad story that might be hemingway–for sale: baby shoes. never worn
I refused one every time. They aren’t done in my family (Irish/UK/PI). Superstition, I suppose. Even though I’m not superstitious, I just couldn’t bring myself to allow anyone to plan one.
My mom’s family never did them for the reasons Manda states although they would attend them for other people. One of my aunt’s co-workers had a baby shower for her at work. The baby was stillborn so now they won’t even attend one. They wait until the baby is born and they have huge Christening parties. My sister’s mother-in-law had a really difficult time accepting this and kept badgering our mom about why she wasn’t hosting a baby shower. Our great aunt sat her down and told her why, then told her that she could go ahead and host one herself but don’t expect any of us to attend and then said she would lock up my sister to make sure she couldn’t attend either. My sister’s mother-in-law finally got the point.
deleted
Ditto a Chinese friend of mine. She and her family consider it tempting fate and unlucky to have a shower before a healthy baby has arrived.
Yeah, I never had one (Irish immigrant to America) because it’s considered bad luck before the birth. Had one after the spawn were spawned.
My husband’s family, Jewish immigrants, were kind of superstitious about it too. Not against it exactly, but nervous about it. They also had the “rule” that you don’t tell anyone outside the family until you are past your first trimester. I had the same rule actually, it’s what my sister had done and what I did too. So I was really surprised when a couple of friends and my family told everyone the minute they found out they were pregnant. I knew how common miscarriages were in the first three months so it just made sense to me to wait.
I can see why Meghan would say it’s not appropriate right now. Not that it’s anyone’s business.
Jewish custom is the same. We don’t do baby showers prior to the birth of a child for reasons as well
Yeah, the closest we get to it traditionally is getting a baby something gold. I gave my friends some things to celebrate the birth, mostly just for them not the baby and we hung out after but I was never at a baby shower thing.
I’m from the states’ and showers were just something we did. I got married, moved to Canada and got pregnant later in life .
I had no family up here. I had a couple of friends at that point. My in laws absolutely did not believe in showers. My friends kept thinking my in laws might do something, and they didn’t. They knew it was something that we did. They would through parties all the time and celebrate everything else.
It was kind of hard, bc I was so excited. I had begun to think I would never be able to have the family I wanted. I wanted to celebrate. Plus, maybe selfishly, we were tight on money and could have used help w some essentials. He has a huge family up here.
Just knowing that it would have been completely different back home, also made it really hard. I don’t know. I’m over it, but just kind of look back at that time and wished it was different.
Oh Erin, I’m so sorry. I meant to say that my experience in Cro is that family and friends do contribute just not with throwing a shower. We’d usually ask if there is anything a baby might need, if not relatives would get something golden as an “you never know” investement and friends would pamper moms with something just for them. But that’s an EE thing. I’m saddened to hear about your experience. Having lived in UK I know what it’s like to live in another country. Hope things got better and people around you got interested in your traditions.
@Erin @XOXO My dear friend moved from Oregon to Edmonton, AB, and she also had kids later in life. She said they don’t do baby showers there. Such celebrations – if any – are usually after the child is born. It sounds like Toronto is more like the US.
Baby showers are an American thing and lots of fun. Especially if it is given by really good friends. The gifts are secondary, it’s the Party that counts.
Erin, I’m a bit surprised. I was born and raised in Toronto, baby showers have always been part of my life. I don’t have children, but all my friend who do, have had showers.
Among Cuban-Americans (and even on the island) baby showers are hosted by a friend/sister, just like bridal showers.
Do whatever you want Meghan! I could see her having a lunch with friends like Neighbor Oprah! Keeping it very intimate with trustworthy people who won’t blab!
I agree. Meghan’s having a girl this time. Baby H&M needs girly things. Not that she can’t wear some of Archie’s old things. If any of H&M’s team is reading this, go for broke. Have a baby shower/sprinkle. And include Harry too.
No, I think Meghan is right. She is not in need of items for the baby and we are just coming off a pandemic. Over 3 million people have died worldwide and here in the US we currently have 8.8 million “long haulers” who have been unable to return to work. This is not the time for wealthy people to indulge themselves and there are too many people wanting to pounce on Meghan and Harry for any little thing. I think that, if they had a shower for this baby, they would alienate some people who are now on their side after Oprah.
This is a weird time. Ordinarily, I would say heckin’ yeah, go for it but not right now.
Us Weekly fan fiction. Baby showers and pandemics don’t really mix.
I say have a baby shower and call it an American “Hen” party.
In all seriousness, I think Meghan getting together with some close friends and just having lunch or whatever would be a great idea. And It could all be under the radar. But at this stage of the game, do they really care what the BRF and BM think or publish?
I see an SNL skit……….and all the ladies sipping tea and wearing Disney princess tiaras.
Her NY baby shower sounded like a lovely weekend and now that we know how dark a place she was in, emotionally and mentally, it makes total sense – she needed that time with her friends to recharge and reset. That’s why she went to New York and everyone didn’t fly to London (which I’m assuming most of them could have done if they had wanted). And of course the british press destroyed her for it.
She may have a baby shower or a sprinkle or she may not. I hope baby girl sussex gets her own book collection from Oprah though!
If nothing else, I hope her friends at least give her a “sprinkle” for baby girl clothes.
A little “sprinkle” as opposed to a shower- lol!
The good thing about her leaving the fishbowl life is that she can do whatever she wants to do. In my family, we gift baby stuff after the little one is born, but there’s nothing wrong with giving baby gifts before that, gathering or not.
I can see her having a small celebration with Harry, Archie, Doria and a few other close friends who live near-ish but not a baby shower like it was for Archie. Also pandemic and all.
Exactly. Something intimate with close friends and Doria but there should be no publicity about it. This is not the time. I’ve been appalled at how some celebrities have flaunted their entitlement over the past year. The whole “this doesn’t affect my life” attitude has been horrifying. Celebrities crying about being “imprisoned” in their $28MM mansion and espousing how the pandemic in which more than 3 million people died worldwide as “oddly beautiful.” Meghan does not need to do anything to have her name included with those tone deaf famous people. Something as showy as a baby shower for Meghan would undo all the beautiful things she has done (in the eyes of many) and paint her as someone who is uncaring. It would just be too big of a stick to beat her with and she does not deserve any of that.
Second baby plus pandemic? Of course she’s not going to have a big shower!
I’m sure when the baby is born lots of people send gifts.
Exactly. It would be more of a story if Meghan DID do a baby shower.
They don’t know anything, they will have some sort of celebration not a huge thing.
Erm…maybe she already had a baby shower and we don’t know about it.
Not many people are doing stuff right now, with covid going on
Second baby showers are tacky.
With that said, after a year of lockdown plus Meaghan being in England for the first baby her friends might be eager for a “do over” and an opportunity to get together. It’s not uncommon for friends/family to get over-excited about throwing a shower despite the bride or mother-to-be not wanting a party.
I never heard of a second baby shower until Kim K had one. Baby showers used to be a practical thing for the new parents; bottles, diapers or a stroller. Mostly things that would be reused for the next baby.
After what she went through with her first pregnancy she deserves to enjoy this one fully with a (limited attendee) baby shower if she likes.
But it’s her choice.
Yeah, no one knows what the Sussexes are doing. That must be nice feeling for them, especially Harry.
This woman is so beautiful. As long as she has a safe and happy pregnancy, that’s all I care about.
I think if the second baby is a different gender from the first a second baby shower is reasonable.
In my circle people only have second baby showers if the second baby is a different sex and then it’s usually mostly clothes, or if there is a large age gap (for example one of my friends had her second baby when her oldest was 9, so she had a large baby shower because she had given away ALL the baby stuff.)
I had a sprinkle for my 2nd even though it was the same gender. My SILs did it to cheer me up since I was on bed rest. I’ve hosted sprinkles for my SILs for their 2nd/3rd. It’s definitely smaller, don’t need the big items and it’s a different vibe that the first baby. It’s more to give mom a break and let her feel appreciated. We just did mani/pedis and lunch at a hotel, very small group, while first showers seem so much bigger. I don’t find it weird.
If she wants she will have a baby shower, if she doesn’t- she won’t have it. The thing is we might never know, bcz this time she is AWAY FROM THAT TOXIC INSTITUTION THAT WAS LEAKING HER EVERY MOVE! Sorry about the caps…
Those “rules” are funny, where I live, showers are parties, more for the sake of celebrating. Some people really go out to get stuff, asking for money at the party. It is bot seen as “gauche”, close friends or family would be asking when the shower is, even if it is your third child.
That what I say. It’s more about the Party with good friends and family. Gifts are an afterthought, at least with my family and friends. But then we find any old reason for a party.
Us Weekly isn’t reliable. That being said I doubt they would have one because of the pandemic. At most a few close friends.
Years ago (and I mean YEARS) when I was pregnant with #1 my Mom called all my Aunts together and said “time to pony up” so I was thrown the mother of all baby showers which included the Dad to be and the Uncles and cousins with a bbq. Baby got sooooo many gifts it was ridiculous.
With #2 & #3 I got hand me downs and no fuss. Much preferred.
Oh!!! and NO gender reveal. Not only did they NOT exist then I would have declined
I had a very small shower put on by a co-worker with 8 guests. It was lovely and I will remain eternally grateful because tbh I would have been a bit sad if there wasn’t one. I didn’t have a lot of support during that time, my son’s dad left me for a wealthy artist I introduced him to while I was pregnant. The first few years of my child’s life were extremely lonely for me. If I ever have another child I would gratefully accept a second shower because it’s been 11 years and I don’t see how I’m supposed to keep all of the baby stuff for that long to pass down. All these rules are kind of weird and outdated IMO. But I totally get Meghan not wanting one at this time. They don’t need it.
She’s not goign to have a baby shower with the pandemic. her friends are going to send her gifts no matter if she wants a shower or not. I’m not sure if pregnant women can ger their covid shots, but for sure she’ll only have lunch to celebrate with friends who are fully vaccinated. That’s what I would do if I was a famous duchess married to a prince living in montecito with rich & fmous friends
It’s essentially a pregnant woman’s choice if they want to get vaccinated or not here in the USA. I think the current advisory by the CDC is for pregnant women to talk over their choices with their doctor. I have a pregnant friend who just got her first shot this week–she was waiting to be past the first trimester before she got it. And I know somebody else who is pregnant in Canada who had scheduled her first shot. I support a pregnant woman to do whatever she thinks is comfortable so if Meghan isn’t vaccinated, I would support that. She lost a baby last summer so I wouldn’t be surprised if she was waiting to give birth before she got vaccinated.
In Ontario pregnant women were allowed to schedule a vaccine last month prior to their age group because there were a few women in ICU who were pregnant and had covid and one baby needed to be induced for early labour. They are in fact highly recommending pregnant women to at ,east get the first dose.
My sister is pregnant and is vaccinated. She’s a teacher so it’s a little more important for her to be vaccinated than Meghan who can work from home.
Pandemic is probably the main reason I agree.
I personally don’t find shower type parties very fun, bridal or baby. I go to most of them but it’s a grin and bear it type of thing. One friend had a gender reveal party which I did go to and then she had a baby shower which I did not attend. I had gotten her a gift certificate to Target for the gender reveal and was like “I am not traveling 4+ hours to the DC area again for the second time in less than 6 months to celebrate a baby I already celebrated.” I typically send a gift and that’s it which I don’t mind doing.
Due to my shy nature, I’m not big on events where I’m forced to participate in large group activities and these types of events usually have traditions I find cheesy and games I don’t enjoy. And the least fun of all, watching someone open a bunch of presents. As I said, I don’t mind buying presents on a registry for a bride or mom to be–I just don’t want to sit there and watch you open them. I would rather watch paint dry. I’ve always told my mom if I ever get married and she forces me to have a bridal shower, we aren’t opening gifts. It’ll be about celebrating all my guests. And yes, second baby showers (unless there is 5+ years between babies and you got rid of all your baby stuff) are very tacky, even if it’s a different gender. So many baby clothes are gender neutral nowadays, it’s not hard to find clothes that you can put on male and female babies.
Also, my friends started doing this tradition that I find VERY tacky: self-addressing an envelope at the actual event so that the bride/mom-to-be doesn’t have to address her thank you notes herself. It’s supposed to “save time and stress” for the host. I’m sorry, but if you can’t sit down for an hour and track down addresses and write them yourself, that is so, so lazy. So when you receive the thank you note, the address is written in your own handwriting as if you sent it to yourself. Please don’t do this if you are organizing a bridal/baby shower. It is beyond tacky, I don’t have a word for it.
I had one cousin hand out the invites to her own baby shower while she was attending another cousin’s baby shower because she didn’t want to spend money on stamps. (This person has a decent job so money wasn’t an issue) Needless to say there were some very upset aunts at this tacky behaviour. She was already on the bad list for not having yet sent out her thank you cards for her wedding and it was over a year later.
SAME: I am not keen on those guess what’s in the diaper games. I am sure loads of women love them, but I find them infantile and stupid. I will grin and bear it for friends but it’s effort for me.
I’m not using US weekly as a reliable source and they have no idea. Most people don’t have showers for the 2nd or third child, but a little sprinkle to celebrate the mom with a few low key gifts like onesies or a few baby clothes is common. A lot of her friends and her mom are in LA/ Montecito and she’s having a girl. I hope someone has a little sprinkle for her in her gorgeous backyard. A few people hanging out at the pool with mimosas, outdoors and socially distanced, having a relaxing day.
“Anyway, I’m not really surprised that Meghan isn’t jazzed about a baby shower at the moment …..”
Wow. OMG! So let me see if I have this straight: the source of this fabrication is US LIES WEAKLY and its taken seriously? Really? OMG! LMAO
We take it as gospel depending on who it’s about . Confirmation bias does not need to be rooted in journalistic integrity .
Meghan is not heartless enough to have a large baby shower right now. That would be flaunting privilege in the face of those who have lost loved ones, their jobs, and their homes. Meghan is not callous. I’m sure they will have a celebration, either before or after the birth or both, that is private and not fodder for the media. Meghan is elegant, gracious, and discreet and any celebration she has will reflect that.
No having a second baby shower is so tacky. Most people I know if anything have a Baby Sprinkle party once the 2nd born.
If this is true-I agree with the poster desert lizard’s statement-gifts will be sent no matter what.
Yep they have no idea what she’ll do re a shower, unless this report was from her staff. And all traditions be damned, Harry and Meghan can do whatever they want for the rest of their lives in my opinion. They have put up with so much BS and NEVER stopped working/giving back to others through it all. If she wants to have a shower in downtown LA at the soup kitchen where she worked at as a teen. If she wants to laze around every day till her due date and not have a shower, And, if she wants to dress up all the chickens, order a military flyover around the Chick Inn, have Abigail Spencer’s Country Florals decorate and Chef Andres cater, invite all the staff from the charities to join her friends at the house to sip champagne and make gift baskets to take back to their clients while Meghan opens girly gifts for the baby and activity sets for Archie, while Coldplay, the Carters, Adele, play live music and Harry , Archie and the dogs laugh and chase the chickens all day. In other words, go Meghan celebrate your life in whatever way gives you joy.
No one want to have baby shower in the pandemic.
To ask guess are they vaccinated yet before coming is a hassle.
Everyone know meghan is clever and thoughtful.
The one who is stupid enough is the BM to even write about this story.