John Mulaney’s wife Anna Marie Tendler sought in-patient treatment too

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Last week, we learned two pieces of unexpected news. One, John Mulaney filed for divorce from his wife Anna Marie Tendler shortly after he left his 60-day rehab program, roughly three months ago. Two, John Mulaney has a new girlfriend, whom he “met in church in LA,” despite the fact that he’s a New York-based comic. No one really knows what’s happening and the timeline is fuzzy for all of this, but it seems clear that this is a bigger mess than most of us were expecting. Now, an added layer: according to Page Six, Anna Marie Tendler also sought treatment in some kind of in-patient rehab center, but her issues were for eating disorders and emotional stress caused by Mulaney’s infidelity.

Comedian John Mulaney’s wife Anna Marie Tendler also went to rehab around the same time late last year, but for emotional reasons, sources say, adding that she suffered because of his alleged infidelity. Gossip columnist AJ Benza first revealed on his podcast, “Fame, Ain’t It A Bitch,” that artist Tendler went into therapy at Silver Hill in Connecticut after her estranged husband of six years Mulaney went into rehab for 60 days for alcohol and drug addiction last December. A source said, “Anna Marie was in rehab at Silver Hill for [emotional]… and eating disorders.”

But the source continued that despite claims on Benza’s podcast, Tender did not talk openly about her husband’s issues. The source added, “She didn’t talk at all about that, we were all on our own journey of recovery. But it is clear she suffered during their marriage.” Tendler is out of rehab and is doing better, we’re told, and focusing on her art.

Page Six exclusively revealed last week that former “SNL” writer Mulaney had asked Tendler for a divorce in February after he left rehab. She said in a statement, “I am heartbroken that John has decided to end our marriage. I wish him support and success as he continues his recovery.”

But other sources say that Tendler — an artist who works across a range of mediums and a master’s candidate in NYU’s Costume Studies program — had struggled recently amid rumors of Mulaney straying. There has been unconfirmed, anonymous online buzz about Mulaney attending strip clubs and giving his number to dancers. A Reddit user called meetmeforkisses wrote that he approached her in 2019. “He was definitely drinking and definitely never mentioned a wife. Did not hesitate to give me his number to meet outside of the club. He was always respectful to me so I could never call him a predator or anything, but I felt so awful when I found out he was married.”

Late last week it emerged Mulaney is now dating actress Olivia Munn. People Magazine wrote the relationship is “very new” and they met at a church in Los Angeles. However, sources note that Mulaney has been on the East Coast for much of the pandemic and returned to New York after he left rehab in February.

[From Page Six]

It feels gross to get information/gossip from someone who was in the program with Tendler. It’s not something people should gossip about. That being said, it’s clear that Tendler has been the wronged party this whole time and that Mulaney left a wave of destruction in his path. I also believe that Mulaney was struggling/relapsing for what looks like the better part of a year, starting in the fall of 2019, I think. His friends were trying to help him during the pandemic and it looks like Anna Marie was trying to stay by his side and work things out, but it all came crashing down on both of them late last year. I also now believe that Mulaney likely got with his current “girlfriend” last year? The timeline is so sketchy, but it feels like it, right?

John Mulaney and Annemarie Tendler

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82 Responses to “John Mulaney’s wife Anna Marie Tendler sought in-patient treatment too”

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  1. Escondista says:

    I remember when you first posted about the divorce and people actually came here to blame it on her being artsy and serious on her own damn Instagram page.
    Sheesh.

    • SnowQueenM says:

      Seriously. While Celebitchy’s coverage has seemed pretty even-handed, I saw other coverage and comments being shady about her, as well, on different websites. These were publications that are typically frequented by women and supposedly feminist-leaning.

      Glad to see there are still plenty of otherwise progressive ladies out there who will cape for total scumbags, but this guy is cute and funny, so it’s okay! He’s just misunderstood. Oldest tale ever. 🙄

    • Amelie says:

      Yeah I was surprised at the backlash against her here. I never knew much about her but it goes with the old saying–you have no idea what the heck people are going through ever behind closed doors. And it is so violating that a fellow patient (?) in the program is talking about Anna Marie’s stay at the rehab center. A quick Google shows that this awful gossip columnist AJ Benza apparently was in league with Weinstein to help clear his name before the whole #MeToo story blew wide open. He was complicit in covering up for him and I don’t understand how he hasn’t been blacklisted in the entertainment world.

      I really hate all of this, I really liked John Mulaney.

      • Gail Hirst says:

        It’s okay to like a person
        A person is not their addiction
        Their addiction, however, can rule against a person’s sense of right/wrong, decent/indecent, loving/unloving behaviours.
        An addict is a master of deceit. And gaslighting.
        An addict will convince you their addiction is your fault, that you’re not good enough, if you let them
        Addiction can erase the person you liked, so it’s also okay to stop liking a person when they live in their addiction, instead of learning new ways of handling their issues. Loving an addict is hard. In my experience….

    • milliemollie says:

      I know, I was shocked what people on here accused her of. Maybe they should re-read Cavills’ post.

    • Amando says:

      Yes it was so sad to see how many people were blaming her. Addicts are notoriously selfish and leave a wake of destruction around them. She may not see it now, but him leaving is the best thing that could have happened to her.

  2. schlussel says:

    Ugh, this story just gets worse. I really feel for Anna, and I hope she is somewhere safe and surrounded by friends and family.

    • Sue Denim says:

      Same, from his comedy I thought of her as quite strong, and for sure it took strength for her to recognize she needed help, but this hits even harder knowing she’s fragile too. And it makes the coldness of his initial statement and rollout of the new gf that much more painful to watch on her behalf. I didn’t understand why people came down on her for her statement, which seemed raw but loving. His, just no love or even kindness at all. Sending them all love and light and hoping they find strength to move forward well.

      • Soupie says:

        “His, just no love or even kindness at all.”

        I had no idea who he was and now I don’t care, even if he’s funny. Sounds like a jerk.

    • Robyn says:

      Wholeheartedly agree. Just an awful mess.

  3. Brittany says:

    I watched a greatest hits reel on YouTube of his comedy the other day (I’d never watched him or really heard of him) and saw him make in succession a long jokey story about him running after a woman and scaring her (he said he thought a train was coming), and then a discussion of how he “loves Jewish women” because “you never have to wonder what they’re thinking.” And then I turned it off because I can do better than half-baked quasi rape jokes and ethnic stereotypes. He honestly sounded like a fratty douchebag with a thin self-deprecatory veneer.

    • Sue Denim says:

      I loved him as a comedian and he was kind of ballast in the Trump/me too storms for me the past few years, but ooof yes, it’s hard not to rethink it all through a new lens now…

  4. carousel says:

    Keeps getting worse. I’m really disappointed in him, he was one of my favorite comics and he had such a distinctive way of looking at things. Poor Anna, I hope she pulls through and rises up.

  5. carousel says:

    Keeps getting worse. I’m really disappointed in him, he was one of my favorite comics and he had such a distinctive way of looking at things. Poor Anna, I hope she pulls through and rises up.

  6. Susan says:

    Olivia Munn…if you are reading this, RUN! I don’t care how funny or charming he is, cheaters gonna cheat. He will cheat on you, too.

    • moptop says:

      Um, I don’t think she cares.

    • Lyds says:

      Um no. Olivia Munn has been on his trail for years, trying to “hang out.” I reread the article of them attending a wedding together and it just seemed like she couldn’t leave him alone — in the presence of Anna Marie, his then-fiancé.

      She even emailed him afterwards to hang out and he never responded, so good for him (at the time). I’m sure it wasn’t easy for AM then, to have this beautiful comedienne literally hound your then fiancé all night and to then realize after all these years, that he always wanted to date her.

    • The Recluse says:

      They seem like birds of a feather. They deserve each other more likely.
      I hope his ex-wife finds someone worthy of her soon.

  7. Case says:

    I feel so sad for her. It really does keep getting worse and worse with every new piece of information!

    • BothSidesNow says:

      It does. Add to the fact that he comes out of rehab and divorces her, now that he is potentially sober. I feel bad for her as we see this play out. She was certainly in the marriage for the long haul, but he certainly wasn’t.

  8. Oh_Hey says:

    Omg it just keeps getting more gross with every single new piece of info. First people blamed his wife then we found out he left. Then people were blaming Olivia Munn, turns out he was a wreck that was cheating and caused the break up before she even got there.

    John and I are done professionally. I get that comics aren’t actually fun happy go lucky types and that they have massive dark sides but this is just to contrary to the persona he was selling and why I became a fan.

    • amb says:

      is it contrary to the “persona he was selling”? he’s been very open about the fact that he was a recovering addict, which means this dark side of him was always there but we just hadn’t seen it publicly (his stories about what he was like when he was using made it clear that he guy was a disaster when he wasn’t clean). addicts can do really awful things to the people they love. if you read anything about his most recent show material, i don’t think he is being really flip about any of this.

  9. Lipreng says:

    I’ve read that Mulaney has been struggling with his sobriety since 2018. Also, if you look through Anna’s pictures she clearly struggles with self mutilation. I hope she’s doing better after going into treatment.

    • Sue Denim says:

      I think that’s the new timeline too. He talked about injuring his hip a few years ago and I wonder if pain meds re-opened him up to this, that or meds for ADHD? And yes, I feel so much for Anna…

    • detritus says:

      .

  10. Piratewench says:

    Ugh I hate that someone from her program is speaking to the press like this. I was recently hospitalized for the first time, as my anxiety disorder took on a whole new and horrible form over the past year, and I had to relearn how to care for myself. (I’m doing worlds better two months later and very thankful for that) .
    I can’t imagine having anyone go talk to the press after being in program with me. You have to get so vulnerable and trusting, it’s how you heal! This is a betrayal.

    I met many people in the hospital who were there due to the effects of both COVID and of marital strife. Life is tough and sometimes we just can’t care for ourselves without help and lots of time to process what has happened to us. And it is SUPPOSED to be a safe and private process.

    • Esmom says:

      I’m glad to hear you are doing better, wishing you continued strength and healing.

    • Midge says:

      It’s so, so wrong. Patients need to feel safe.

    • AmyB says:

      I agree – this is such a breach of confidentiality. It’s truly awful someone would go to the press like that for “gossip” about a break-up.

      • BothSidesNow says:

        I would think that Anna Marie may have a case her for someone disclosing her treatment at the facility. And shame of this POS with his podcast for hosting another person at the same facility to broadcast the experience for Anna Marie!

        @ Piratewench, I hope that you are doing better and I want to applaud you for having the courage to make the decision to seek help. It’s a frightening time for you but you are a strong person for having the courage to seek treatment. I hope that your life becomes better each day!

    • Huit says:

      I am happy to hear you are feeling better. I have much respect for the work you must have put in… and continue to do. All the best. x

  11. Chelsea says:

    I agree that it sucks that we are hearing this from a source that was in her treatment buy im kinda glad this is out there so people will hopefully stop blaming her for what happened and leave her alone. I hope she has a good support system around her while she is navigating this mess because i cant imagine this laat week has been easy for her.

  12. Chisey says:

    That’s very sad, and I agree that getting gossip from someone who was in treatment with her is incredibly gross. Maybe it’s best not to post something like that? IDK. But it does sound like she needs care and support right now, and having the Internet stans come at a largely private person during such a difficult time must be awful. I’m definitely wishing good things for her.

  13. Sue Denim says:

    Btw an ER MD friend told me the other day that while covid cases are way down in her hospital, she’s been shocked by the rise of psych cases. She predicted it a year ago, but even still she’s been overwhelmed, esp by the numbers of children coming in — mainly teenagers but as young as 6, coming in w anger, depression, anxiety, dangerous ideation toward themselves and others. That plus adult addiction issues she’s seeing as well. Hard times… Just something to be aware of among those we love and in our wider circles as well…

    • Midge says:

      That’s so sad. Thankfully there is a more open conversation around mental health and addiction, and people are seeking care. But there are so many gaps in access to affordable treatment.

    • OriginalLala says:

      It’s true, in Ottawa, our children’s hospital is seeing unprecedented numbers of kids/teens seeking in-patient mental health services including shockingly high numbers of them suffering from eating disorders – the pandemic’s long term consequences on our mental (and physical) health have only just begun.

      • Soapboxpudding says:

        Hello fellow Ottawan! I didn’t know that about CHEO. A few friends here are psychologists and have had to close their wait lists because they’re swamped. The positive I take from this is that a lot of people are looking for help, which is better than suffering in silence like all of history. Now governments need to provide more resources to help.

      • ABW says:

        My friends in MA have been unable to find beds for their acute teenagers in the last few months.

  14. Lily says:

    Something’s not adding up. I smell a whiff of manipulation…

    Is she implying she’s heartbroken and wanted to stay in the marriage, yet he’s a cheater who is responsible for her rehab stint / eating disorder?

    It sounds like she’s trying to get ahead of the story by highlighting how much of a victim of his behaviour she is. And it was An Eating Disorder NOT her own substance abuse issues. Right.

    Something’s askew. I’m in no way blaming her for his issues. But I am also not blaming him for hers.

    • Red Weather Toger says:

      That struck me, too. I think it is important to note that she didn’t say any of it, though. Her only comment (as far as I know) was being heartbroken at his decision to end their marriage and wishing him well. “Sources” have provided info on her inpatient stint with their take on it, while “other sources” claim he was a big cheater. Maybe he was a big cheater, but she loved him and wanted to work it out?

      • Jules says:

        Everyone likes to think that they would be strong enough to kick their partner to the curb after behavior like this, but in reality, if you love someone and think they can be redeemed it is much harder. I think she was unfairly outed, and that John is probably a jackass. Hope she recovers fully and moves on to have a good life without his self destructive bs.

    • whateveryousay says:

      That’s gross what you just posted. Also she’s not saying this. Someone who apparently was in treatment when she went spilled the beans and that’s beyond awful that she had her privacy violated this way.

      • Meg says:

        No it reads like manipulated to me. ‘heartbroken he’s decided to divorce’ she wants us to know it’s his doing not hers. Usually celeb comments are not that emotional or specifying it wasn’t me who wanted out it was him. She wants the public in her side. Which considering the already pro John comments on social media she probably feels defensive
        This person with her in treatment may have gotten her ok to discuss publicly to again get us on her side.

    • amb says:

      addicts do really awful horrible things to the people they love. clearly this was not a situation where either of them were healthy and could provide the other with the support they needed. while i feel for her that he was likely cheating, it also seems like after treatment he realized their relationship wasn’t a healthy one (and i’m not blaming that on her but she apparently had her own issues going on as well) and needed to end for both of their well being.

      • Merricat says:

        +1

      • Sue Denim says:

        He still could have been much kinder in his statement and gf rollout. I actually now wonder about abuse on his part, maybe not physical but emotional. His statement — esp knowing she’d been so fragile herself — was soooo cold.

      • amb says:

        Sue Denim– I don’t think *his* statement was cold— his rep confirmed the divorce filing and then said he would not comment any further. I don’t think that is cold– that is what his rep should have said to keep gossip to a minimum given that it wasn’t a joint statement. I think whoever greenlit the Munn confirmation should be fired but I am not convinced it was his camp– that wreaks of Munn’s camp and I hope he drops her b/c of it.

    • Case says:

      Anna Marie isn’t the one who supplied this information; her private medical information was leaked.

      • Lily says:

        How do we know that??

        The story never said that the source was someone in treatment with her, it simply said “A source.”

        A source who knows exactly what went on during her rehab AND knows how SHE IS DOING OUT OF REHAB.

        Staff don’t leak medical records either. They’d never practice again and it’s bad for business.

        I think we’re all savvy enough readers to know that leaks of this nature are rarely accidental. Typically, people call in themselves to give the scoop but ask that it be labeled ‘from a source’. The leak is her. Clearly.

        People were blaming her for his relapse so she’s trying to do the same.

        She truly may have suffered in the marriage, but her statements and leaks aren’t helping her cause. And blaming him for her issues is just as vile.

      • PrincessMe says:

        @Lily

        What I don’t understand is why you’re convinced it must be HER leaking this information? Even if the source is not someone who was in rehab with her (and I’m guessing “we were all on our own journey of recovery…” is why people think the source was in rehab with her), how do you know that she’s the one who went to the tabloids? You don’t think there’s anybody who could possibly know her and how she’s been coping?

        I think we should just leave the woman alone and give her the benefit of the doubt and the space to grieve.

    • Amelie says:

      The gossip columnist who leaked the story, AJ Benza, is widely known as helping cover up Weinstein’s predatory behavior and would help kill the stories every time a woman tried to speak up. I doubt Anna Marie gave this source her blessing to tell her story to AJ Benza. If Anna Marie were the source, I’d expect her to go to People or Us Weekly, not AJ Benza.

    • Jules says:

      I agree that something isn’t adding up, why are we all assuming her private medical info got leaked? The wording feels very off to me as well, more like something a publicist would say. And they have children? Team kids, all the way, the ones who will suffer the most.

    • Chicken says:

      Woof. This is a bad take, and you should feel bad about it.

    • chisey says:

      It kind of feels like this whole line of thought is reaching pretty far to find a way to not sympathize a woman going through a hard time. It feels like a conspiracy theory. You do you, but I’m going to take it at face value until I see actual evidence that she’s engaging in some next-level manipulation.

      • M says:

        @chisey you sound very new to how things work in hollyweird

      • Sue Denim says:

        I’m w you chisey and chicken. I don’t understand the instinct to find fault w Anna at all, or to imply it’s naive to think otherwise. Where does that come from?

      • Sigmund says:

        @M No need to be patronizing. And I think we all need to be cognizant of how deeply patriarchal views are embedded in all of us. Regardless of the “truth” (and I’m not sure there’s one objective truth to any of this), we should be careful about making accusations and assumptions.

      • M says:

        sigmund, this is a gossip blog built on making assumptions. and gossip.

    • TaraBest says:

      You can be heartbroken by your partner’s behavior and want to stay in a marriage…and also be the one to pursue divorce. My ex is an SA, despite that I wanted to make our marriage work. He continued lying to me and manipulating me and acting on his addiction. This drove me to an ED and severe depression and I realized I needed to get away from him if I was going to continue living. Although I’m the one who filed for divorce, my heart was (and still is sometimes) so very broken that someone I loved and trusted abused me and our relationship to the point where I had to leave to protect myself. It can be “both ways”.

      • Vernie says:

        Tarabest, thank you for sharing your nuanced perspective. I’m so sorry for your heartache and wish you continued healing and peace.

  15. amb says:

    I’m confused as to how there has been a jump from marital strife is the cause of her need for treatment when the unethical source of the information indicated that she never mentioned that as being the cause of her need for treatment. i think obviously both of them have significant issues and a continued marriage between them isn’t likely to be healthy for either party.

    • FrenchGirl says:

      +1

    • Merricat says:

      Sometimes two people in love turn out to be unhealthy for each other. That’s a hard fact of life.

    • Arpeggi says:

      Absolutely. Obviously, if he was cheating, that’s an excellent reason to end the relationship, but ultimately, it seems like but had their struggles and maybe they weren’t bringing the best out of each other which, again, is an excellent reason to divorce. I feel uncomfortable with blaming either of them for the other’s problems though, that’s not the way anyone should spin the story. Relapsing can be triggered and exacerbated by external factors but it remains a personal struggle

    • cassandra says:

      Agree with this take.

      I’m sure marital strife and his addiction absolutely intensified her own struggles. My guess is that, like a lot of women, she’s struggled with disordered eating for a long time.

  16. AmyB says:

    This is definitely messy indeed. I can only speak of my own experience of being married to a drug addict/alcoholic (his drug of choice was cocaine and heroin) for ten years. I was a recovered anorexic upon meeting my ex-husband, and throughout the course of our marriage, and in the effort of “trying to save him” (which I NOW know is unhealthy and co-dependent) I became very emotionally unhealthy, and started to fall back into my own unhealthy eating disordered behaviors. Not to the extent of my 20s, but I definitely lost quite a bit of weight due to the stress, became very depressed and anxious over the roller coaster of my ex-husband’s constant relapses of sobriety. Until you have lived this F**KING hell, you really don’t get it. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy, so I feel for Anna. Especially, as this situation looks like it is complicated with infidelity. Mine was not, but it felt like my ex was cheating on me with his addiction. He chose that again and again, over me and our daughter. That cuts you to the core. I know it is a disease, and that controlled him, but it hurts everyone around the addict as well.

    I hope everyone in this situation gets the help they need, and can heal. I am fine now and my ex husband is sober. I am very grateful for that xo

    • Sophie says:

      Thank you for sharing your perspective. I found it very helpful in trying to understand the dynamic with J&A. So happy to hear that that painful time in your life is in the past and that you’ve been able to heal and come out the other side!

      • AmyB says:

        @Sophie – thank you for the kind words. Yes, that’s what I wanted to point out – it is a very complicated dynamic. THAT being said, if John really is embarking on some new relationship, I will throw a bit of shade there….that is one thing AA is adamant about! Not getting into any kind of serious relationship (meaning new one) the first year or so of your sobriety. Does everyone heed that advice? Of course not. I myself, did not date for some two years after splitting with my ex. I was broken and emotionally devastated. I needed to heal; I would have been no good for anyone else. I am glad I took that time. But, some people just can’t be alone.

  17. Valiantly Varnished says:

    Can we stop pretending that John Mulaney is a just a good guy with an addiction problem now? He’s a douche with an addiction problem.

  18. MaryContrary says:

    I hope she recognizes she’s much better off without him, and focuses on her own emotional health and well being. I wish her peace. And if he was really serious about his own sobriety, he would not be jumping into a relationship. So best of luck, dude.

  19. Meime says:

    This is all so disappointing because Mulaney seemed so…good. Not just decent, but actually good? I feel so much for Anna and what she has been going through, and this is definitely one of those times I think that eventually she will realize she is better off without him.

    As a Mulaney fan I really hope he can get his life back together and stay healthy. An addict cheating on his spouse is not a deal breaker for me as a fan of his comedy (people are messy and addiction is a beast.) Mulaney was never a celebrity crush or anything, so it’s just the comedy for me, as long as there are no stories of him being a predator or abusive (beyond the emotional abuse he obviously put Anna through while in the throws of his addiction and through his infidelity.) I truly wish the best for both him and Anna going forward in their lives and recoveries.

  20. souperkay says:

    I feel like as soon as rehab started to make him feel better, he started to chase those feel better feelings through an obvious ongoing conversation with Olivia Munn. The timeline of the two of them meeting in church was 2015, so I think they probably had a low key ongoing text conversation where Olivia made it clear she was interested and he went to her when he wanted a rush of the good feelings that rehab was giving him. Honestly, I don’t feel like he was thinking of his wife at all, resolving things with her would not be new romance rush, it would be difficult, so he didn’t.
    I don’t feel like he’s stable now, I feel like he’s still self-medicating, just replacing the substance.

  21. KNy says:

    This is all so bizarre. I hope she is doing better now, but it’s horrible anyone leaked that information about her treatment.

  22. Liz version 700 says:

    Wow. God I hope she has support and good damn friends. I hope she gets a piece of his a$$ in the settlement. I used to love him as a comic, but I do not think all of this behavior is drug related. The pandemic made it harder for him to hide his true self.

  23. Jannie says:

    But seriously, her description what “an artist who works across a range of mediums and a master’s candidate in NYU’s Costume Studies program” does even mean?? sounds like a socialite who enjoys occasional coke sesh

    • Ann says:

      It’s possible her family has money which is how she can afford to be an artist and get a masters in Costume Studies. On the other hand, I don’t know that she hasn’t sold her work or earned money in other ways through her art. You can be an artist without being into coke. And her soon-to-be-ex husband has money, some of which she will likely get in a divorce. New York has alimony, I think.

    • TaraBest says:

      I know that she was hand making and selling lampshades using Victorian techniques for a while. I saw an interview with her years a ago and it seems her work was very skilled and something only a handful of people still produce. Not sure what she’s working on now but I believe she is a textile artist, which is a real career for some.

  24. Queen Meghan’s Hand says:

    I did not think that this petite wholesome-looking couple would have such a torrid breakup.
    Tendler may be heartbroken but this relationship ending may have saved her life. My heart goes out to her.

  25. Normades says:

    This is just going to get messier.

  26. Ky says:

    I feel weird typing this, but I remember AJ Benza from The Gossip Show and I was wondering what happened to him.