We’ve heard a lot more from Paulina Porizkova in the last few years. She’d been living a quieter life until we learned about her split with Ric Ocasek. They were together for 30 years. Then he cut her out of his will and that bit of gossip put Paulina’s name back in the mainstream headlines. What I love is that she used the renewed interest to relaunch her brand on social media. She’s posting enviable selfies and started modeling a little more. I found her reemergence empowering. Unfortunately, the renewed interest in Paulina also brought out the trolls who don’t think women over 25 should present themselves as desirable. And although she’s admitted the criticism gets to her, her response to those knuckle-draggers has been marvelous. It’s usually a bikini shot with some form of still think I’m doing it better than you type caption.
In her latest Instagram post, Paulina opened up about single life. Her last known relationship was with Aaron Sorkin in 2021. On Tuesday, she posted the photo above in bed alone. The caption was about keeping one side of the bed open for someone else. Then she mused about how people need each other to survive and that we place too high a virtue on remaining alone.
I still sleep only on one side of the bed. After almost an entire lifetime of sharing my space with someone else, I’m still keeping it open – for someone else.
Humans are pack animals. We thrive in company and wither with loneliness.
Why is it then, that we celebrate the lonesome cowboy riding off into the sunset?
Why do we see being solitary as a strength?
Why do we despise the word “need” and celebrate only “want”?
We actually “need” love to survive. Like we do air and food and drink. This is how we’ve been built. So why is it so easy to say “I need food, I need a glass of water, I need some air” – but terrified of admitting our emotional needs?I think there is more strength in sharing.
In acknowledging and embracing our vulnerabilities and needs.
Even the lonesome cowboy riding off into the sunset isn’t wholly alone. He’s on his horse.(Gentlemen, this is not a call for your company- or a dating site- I’m merely making a point.😁😉)
[From Instagram via Yahoo]
I don’t agree with all Paula’s points, but I do think it makes for an interesting discussion. As for the value we assign being solitary, I don’t think it’s just being alone we glorify, but rather the ability to be alone and not flounder. In that way, I think being solitary *is* a strength. But so is being able to maintain healthy relationships. We do view people who choose to be alone as romantic but we also view many of them with caution. For every “lonesome cowboy” and eclectic but brilliant artist trope, there’s a radical in their basement and a crazy cat lady who doesn’t unlatch the door stereotype. And being loved certainly makes life enjoyable, but I thrived in many of my single years. However, to Paulina’s point, people loved me in those years, they just weren’t romantic love interests, “Even the lonesome cowboy riding off into the sunset isn’t wholly alone. He’s on his horse.” Oh for the love of a good horse.
However, I do agree that we should allow people the space to admit when they want someone in their life. I can’t speak for men, but I know for women, if you admit you want a partner, you get labels like “needy” or “boy-crazy.” I’m all for society accepting emotional needs as much as any other need. And wanting to have a companion is just as valid as wanting some time with yourself. As I said, I think it’s a great jumping off point for discussion.
And I know this is pretty far off her point, but I also really want to go horseback riding now.
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- – NYC – New York – 10/18/21 – ” Last Night In Soho “New York Special Screening – Pictured: Paulina Porizkova – Photo By: Dave Allocca/StarPix – Location: New York Featuring: Paulina Porizkova Where: NYC, New York , United States When: 18 Oct 2021 Credit: Dave Allocca/Starpix
Photo credit: Avalon Red, Instagram and Cover images
I slept sprawled out when I was single and now I sleep next to my husband. Never did I carve out an unused space in my life for someone to fill it. I just made room.
Water doesn’t boil when you stare at it Paulina.
She was always one of my favorite supermodels of that era (and Christy Turlington too). I do love seeing her back out there.
She did a tutorial for these wispy lashes called Faslcara. I owe her a debt of gratitude for that tip. They’re great!
I have always thought she was pretty but it was not until I read an essay she did for the Huffington Post about 15 years ago that I realized she is a fantastic writer who is very smart and has a deep perspective. Now I understand why she married Ric Ocasek back in the day and said she was attracted to men with brains. I am sure she will be able to find somebody to occupy the other side of that bed if she really wants it
And for someone whose first language isn’t English she is remarkably articulate, funny, and eloquent. I too really enjoyed that column she did for HuffPo and wish she would focus more on her writing and less on “branding” herself. She finally did sell her beautiful apartment so probably isn’t hurting for money and can do what she wants.
i’m glad things didn’t go south with her sons over the will. That could have turned into a nasty lawsuit. He was just pissed at her at the time for having a boyfriend. He wasn’t expecting to die and from all accounts she was still taking care of him. When he cut her out.
Some people are relationshp people and need that side kick in life. Some are loners (like me) my bed and remote are MINE ALL MINE!!
Each their own, I hope she finds the happiness she needs in life.
I get what she is trying to say and I do agree, to a degree.
I live in a country where there still is very strong sense of social obligation to pair up, get married, have children and the consequences aren’t always nice. I think it is liberating to acknowlodge that romantic pairing in life isn’t end-all-be-all for everyone and that in fact, it never was for everyone through majority of human history. Look at past societies:you always had “spinsters” of various types, unmarried sisters, aunts etc. in the richer households, “bachelors” of all types also.
But, I do agree that we do need some kind of love in our lives, definitely-we need that deep connection- but I don’t think it has to be romantic.
I feel like I’m the opposite type and had to really work to carve out half of my life for another person. I love being partnered, but it continues to be work in some ways for me. My instinct is to go solo.
Girl stop. Please.
Exactly. This is the way I feel, too. Why in the world is she advertising her need for a relationship?! If this is the way she feels, then she should just go & focus on finding a partner. I don’t understand why she is trying to make this subject an “argument” of sorts. Such drama…it’s just…exhausting.