‘Spare’: King Charles told his sons ‘Don’t make my final years a misery’

The Guardian was the first to publish selected excerpts from Prince Harry’s Spare. The biggest news, as we already discussed, was Prince William’s violent assault on his younger brother in 2019. Just in that brief passage, we learned so much about the brothers’ toxic relationship and the cycles of abuse Harry was subjected to both personally and institutionally. I didn’t include the last part of the Guardian’s piece because I thought it deserved a stand-alone post. From the Guardian:

Harry’s resentment of being the “spare” is the unifying theme of his book, through chapters on his childhood, his schooling, his career as a royal and in the British army, his relationship with his parents and brother and his life with Meghan through courtship, wedding and marriage to their own experience of parenthood.

Early on, Harry recounts the story of how his father, now King Charles, supposedly said to his wife, Princess Diana, on the day of Harry’s birth: “Wonderful! Now you’ve given me an heir and a spare – my work is done.”

Whether describing his memories and love for Diana, who was killed in a car crash in Paris in August 1997, or his similar love for his grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, who died last year, Harry is unsparing in his recounting of intensely private scenes and conversations.

…One of Harry’s most pertinent revelations of private conversations between the senior royals comes from the very front of his book. Harry recounts an anguished meeting with Charles and William after the Windsor Castle funeral of Prince Phillip, the queen’s husband, in April 2021.

Charles, he says, stood between his warring sons, “looking up at our flushed faces”.

“Please, boys,” Harry quotes his father as saying. “Don’t make my final years a misery.”

[From The Guardian]

“Charles, he says, stood between his warring sons, ‘looking up at our flushed faces.’” This was just after Prince Philip’s funeral at Windsor Castle in 2021. Harry flew into the UK alone (Meghan was heavily pregnant with Lili) and a huge chunk of the funeral reporting was about Harry and William walking together after the funeral, and how Kate facilitated that walk and conversation because she’s the keenest linchpin peacemaker of all time. Weirdly, there were rumors – not widespread rumors, but some reporting by the British tabloids and royal biographers – that Harry and William got into a physical altercation following the funeral. Given Harry’s story about William getting him alone in 2019 and assaulting him in Nottingham Cottage, I now wonder if something similar happened once the family was away from the camera positions. I wonder if William jumped his brother or physically attacked him just after the service for their grandfather. That would go a long way towards explaining their “flushed faces” and Charles’s weaksauce intervention. It would also explain why Harry did not bother to fly in for Philip’s memorial service in 2022 – he wanted to avoid being assaulted by his brother again.

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86 Responses to “‘Spare’: King Charles told his sons ‘Don’t make my final years a misery’”

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  1. Julia K says:

    You reap what you sow, Charles.

    • Sugarhere says:

      “Dont make my final years a misery”, says the man who turned his sons’ first 15 years into a motherless nightmare. 😂

    • Liz Version 700k says:

      Poor Baby Chucky. You made and make the lives of everyone around you a nightmare. Go find your teddy bear and leave Harry alone

      • aftershocks says:

        Yep. Rather than the ‘poor, beleaguered, long-suffering Pa’ some firm defenders will try to spin this, Chuck comes off as the weak, ineffectual, selfish, neglectful father he truly is. Karma don’t play.

  2. Emily_C says:

    To Charles, it is always about Charles.

  3. C says:

    This line had me howling. “Don’t mek my finahl yahs a misery, darling boys!” as he cries crocodile Laphroaig-flavored tears. Charles is such a loser.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      He’s manipulative is what he is! I know that play intimately.

      • C says:

        Seriously. And final years my ass! He’s been waiting his whole life for this. He’s going to cement himself to that throne and live till 120 just out of spite.

      • Sue E Generis says:

        He’s a covert narcissist. Always whining and sorry for himself and everything is always about him.

      • Mimsy says:

        Totally — he’s a vulnerable narcissist. Super into playing the victim and getting people to feel sympathy for them and through that, attention.

  4. ThatsNotOkay says:

    There was probably a lot of arguing and yelling, and zero accountability from William. And William demanding Harry bow, kneel, and scrape, and protect him, because that is his burden and duty.

    There is no point in having that conversation when at least one side is unwilling to listen or change. Is an immovable object. That’s when you go around it to escape. And that’s what Harry did.

  5. Jay says:

    This is very on brand for Charles – YOUR conflict is interfering with MY happiness, so please keep it down. He doesn’t say he wants them to resolve their issues, he just wants not to be bothered or overshadowed. Just stuff those feelings back where they belong, boys, and carry on.

    • Jennifer says:

      No parent wants animosity between their children.

      • Jay says:

        Charles refused Harry’s suggestion of a mediator for the family – he is not interested in them resolving their conflict, he just doesn’t want their problems to bother him in any way.

      • Emily_C says:

        That is untrue. There are parents who don’t care. There are also parents who purposefully orchestrate animosity between their children.

      • Erin says:

        Yeah that’s not true. My husbands father who is a narcissist 100% pits his children against each other. Now that we have removed ourselves from them we don’t have to really deal with it but he manipulated all of them to see who was the most loyal and would reward that one. He was constantly trying to sow seeds of jealousy by talking up one of the siblings and how amazing their house was (his favorite kid is always the one who makes the most money) or how perfect their kids (his grandkids) were to get a reaction out of another one. It was a competition of who could be the best child which resulted in so much ass kissing and falling all over themselves to appease him even if he treated them like crap that I couldn’t stand it and he loved every second of it. He loves praise pretty much above all else so this is a very good and easy way to get it because they are your kids, not fully grown adults, you have the chance to mold them from day one.

      • Wendy says:

        Pitting their children against each other is a standard feature of narcissist parents. Pick up literally any book about narcissist parents and look in the index for the word “triangulation”.

      • Jaded says:

        Ever heard the expression “divide and conquer”?

      • Tan says:

        A blatantly untrue comment

    • Lemons says:

      To be honest, his sons are too old and he is too older for this type of drama. Charles is undoubtedly tired of this. He should have handled it years ago, and now he has this to take care of in his later years. His fault.

      But his reaction is at once, not surprising and kind of funny. Like he is tiiiiired.

      • s808 says:

        right, if he had done the work on the front end, he wouldn’t be dealing with this now. but alas.

      • C says:

        Charles invented the game they are playing, lol, in terms of pettiness and drama. But if he were directly involved in something he wouldn’t be too tired for it, no, sir. But other peoples’ problems (and feelings) tire him, and always have.

  6. Amy Bee says:

    Harry said in the docuseries that his father and brother were still stuck on the same things and that the discussions didn’t go anywhere. So it wouldn’t surprise me if William was trying to get physical with Harry again but the scene also shows how weak Charles is that he is unable or unwilling to solve the issues between his two sons.

    • Tacky says:

      Charles can’t resolve the issues between his sons. They have to work that out amongst themselves. He can, however, solve his issues with Harry by apologizing and taking accountability for the abuse Harry and Meghan endured at his hands.

  7. IForget says:

    I’m sensing a ‘both sides are just as bad’ vibe from this. This ‘both-sides’ing is rife throughout the comments on Harry’s excerpts.

    I am in awe of Harry and Meghan’s bravery in speaking out. They give me courage to do the same.

    • Emily_C says:

      There really is a lot of “both sides”-ing, yeah. Harry was abused by Will. That is not “drama” or whatnot.

  8. s808 says:

    Hell will be jealous of where Charles will end up. What a terrible, useless father.

  9. Lucy says:

    Nah…give him the final years he deserves! He made his bed.

    • Mabs A'Mabbin says:

      Exactly. Let him be the last. Let him know it. Let him sow it. Let it be his last dying thought…he destroyed rule. Hahahaha.

    • Mary Pester says:

      Exactly, with Charles it’s always about Charles, what he wants, when he wants. And he is as ineffectual a father as he is a king. Maybe Camilla is the mother HE always wanted. You cannot and must not as a parent allow one child to be beaten into submission to benefit yourself and the other son, but this is exactly what he has done. I’m so glad Harry is out of there

  10. sunny says:

    Why not? He made Diana’s last years a misery. I can’t feel anything but disgust for how this man has failed both of his sons. Yikes.

  11. CC says:

    I feel like Charles cares less about the relationship between his son than he cares about if a servant squeezed out his toothpaste the right way.

  12. Barbie1 says:

    Harry shouldn’t bother going to the coronation. The royal family’s hatred toward him must be at an all time high. But poor Charles. His pleas falling on deaf ears. Harry will continue giving incendiary interviews for years to come (it is very profitable afterall) and William will rage in private truly making their dad’s life a misery. Charles is old and the stress will ruin his health one day. His sons don’t think about his health I’m sure..

    • Emily_C says:

      Oh my god no not “poor Charles.” Also American outlets don’t pay for interviews like British ones do. You’re both sides-ing and buying into Charles’ narcissistic poor little me narrative.

      • Becks1 says:

        Charles should care about his son’s health no matter what, and yet he does not.

      • Gizmo’sMa says:

        @barbie1 Why should Harry care about Charles health, when it is obviously not reciprocated?

        Charles pulled his security detail! He knew the world had Harry and his family location. He didn’t care if something happened to them. Charles pays millions of pounds a year to maintain security for his pedo brother but can’t do for his son.

        So no. Harry doesn’t owe Charles anything.

      • Barbie1 says:

        @EMILY_C Harry made alot of money from netflix and his book deal.

      • Lady D says:

        Harry works for his money, Charles accepts bags of filthy lucre from some the most mentally diseased men on the planet. He then uses that money to pay for the family’s corrupt deviant to be safe. (not William, the other one)
        Also willing to bet that what Harry and Meghan get paid won’t even come close to the billion+ the press had made off them with palace approved lies.

    • Barbie1 says:

      @GIZMO’SMA I’m sure Charles cares about Harry. My understanding is that only working royals get to have a security detail. But I would strip Andrew of everything if it were up to me. But having one parent healthy and alive is better than no parents.

      • Zapp Brannigan says:

        @Barbie you are obviously lucky enough to have caring, emotionally healthy parents. I think the extent of care Charles has for Harry relies very heavily on what Harry can do for Charles and Charles reputation. Just because Diana died doesn’t mean the Harry should accept all the cruelty that Charles dishes out.

      • Gizmo’sMa says:

        @barbie1 Charles is currently privately paying for his Andrew security detail. His pedo brother! But could not do the same for his son. So no he doesn’t care about Harry’s health or wellbeing. He only cares about Harry as an extension of himself. Which is what this very article is saying.

      • Barbie1 says:

        @ GUZMO’SMA Charles should pay for Harry’s security if he’s doing it for Andrew. That’s for sure.

      • Moxylady says:

        There is no evidence that Charles cares for Harry. He never once defended him or Meghan in the press. All he does is leak about how much Harry hurts him by speaking out about the abuse he has suffered but never about the pain has has suffered and his sorrow at causing it.
        He made that boy walk behind his mother’s casket so the world wouldn’t hate him and then he never mentioned his mother again. Didn’t get him to therapy or anything to process the violent sudden loss. And of course – always treated William better and protected him in the press.
        Hell the QE funeral was just one long pettiness parade by Charles against Harry when Harry was deeply grieving. He wasn’t even there when Harry got to Scotland to see the qieeen. He and William had gone off to get dinner. Leaving the spare alone and in the Cold as per usual.

      • Sandy B says:

        Isn’t Harry rich enough to pay for his own security without asking daddy to do it? I seem to remember Harry also complaining about being cut off financially by Charles when he moved to Canada (and was in his thirties already). Whether Charles pays for Andrew’s security is his business. I certainly wouldn’t do it because I believe what’s been reported.

      • Gizmo’sMa says:

        @SandyB The argument I was making isn’t about money and whether Harry could afford it. It about the lack of caring Charles, his father, exhibited toward him. That he only cares about people as an extension of himself.

        Yes technically it’s Charles money and he is free to do with it as he pleases. And it pleases him to pay over 3 million dollars a year in security for his pedo brother. Bc he cares that his disgusting brother is on his side.

        So Let’s not gloss things over. He didn’t tell Harry during the summit in January he would be removing his security. Why? Bc that would have given Harry time to make preparations. He told Harry with two weeks notice he was doing it. When the world was beginning to shut down in a global pandemic. The entire world knew where he was. Harry and Meghan had legit death threats against them. And Charles removed the security anyway.

        The security removal is just one of many reasons why I believe Charles doesn’t care about Harry and/or his family.

      • Lady D says:

        “But having one parent healthy and alive is better than no parents.” Sorry, no. Until I was 30, I spent a lot of time wishing I had died at one, with my mother. (I didn’t know I needed help.)

      • Becks1 says:

        @SandyB – at this point, yes, Harry can afford his own security. What he’s asking for is to be able to pay for met security when he is in England.

        When they were in Canada and their security was suddenly cut off? Yes, he could afforded it with Diana’s inheritance, but probably not long term (that kind of security is $$$). And the line about “being in his 30s and cut off from daddy” is just dumb, to be honest.

      • Tan says:

        @Sandy – if that’s the case then Wills and chucks can leave Harry’s name out of their mouths and never speak of him again. Since chucks wants to use his second son for good will only while never refuting the stories that buckingham puts out on the sly then at least he can pay for his sons services whose life he put in danger to begin with.

      • Saucy&Sassy says:

        Barbie1, I find your comments interesting. It appears that you make a statement and wait to see what everyone says. Maybe it’s a sport for you, I don’t know. I think your intent, however, is to permeate this site with your belief–which comes across royalist.

        I have no doubt that you can find a site that agrees with your view of Chuck the super parent. I’m not sure where, but there must be one.

    • MsIam says:

      @Barbie, don’t forget that the royals, including “poor old Charles” will continue leaking and planting sh!t about the Sussexes for years to come too. Not much difference between that and an interview imo. Either way you get your point across. Harry is just not afraid to put his name to his statements, unlike the other cowards. And Harry and Meghan have a long, long way to go to catch up with the b.s. his relatives and their sycophants have spewed.

    • Lizzie says:

      Harry will continue giving HONEST interviews for years to come, not being cowardly like William releasing lies under the cover of ‘royal source’.
      Fixed it for you.

      • Lizzie says:

        Also, interviews in the US are not profitable, just expenses paid. Your probably thinking of the Trash Tabloids who outright offer pay for lies.

    • C says:

      Nope. There’s no reason to feel bad for Charles. This is a mess of HIS making. The abuse he and Camilla put Diana through was horrifying – what we’re hearing about what he’s done to Harry is the tip of the iceberg. If Charles was a person worth feeling bad for, he would have issued something against Clarkson or made sure his wife who is close friends with Clarkson did. He is a liar who endangered Harry.

    • Eurydice says:

      I feel bad for Charles the way I feel bad for King Lear. A tragedy of his own making.

    • Jaded says:

      It’s clear that the only thing Charles cares about is Charles, otherwise he would have nipped this situation in the bud decades ago. He sat back and watched — even condoned — the relationship between his two sons self-destruct, and now he’s paying the price. Poor Charles my ass…

    • Tan says:

      If chucks and wills gets to leak every crumb of Harry’s private communication to them and gets the rota to prints lies bout him and his wife the least Harry can do is tell his side of the story. Or I don’t know let his family and the press bury them till they can’t breathe

  13. Becks1 says:

    I wouldn’t be surprised if there was some sort of physical altercation after the funeral, or at the very least a verbal fight. The “flushed faces” indicates that there was something going on.

    I feel like Harry was probably thinking his father would intervene but instead he just whined about his final years. Its something that I think a lot of people with toxic and abusive siblings can understand sympathize with.

    • Lorelei says:

      Yeah, the “flushed faces” is there for a reason…we’re supposed to read between the lines

      • Becks1 says:

        Especially considering that this is in the Guardian article along with the story about the physical assault.

      • Feeshalori says:

        Yes, I saw flushed faces, and immediately thought of another altercation. And Charles just couldn’t control this.

      • TeamMeg says:

        Flushed faces can come from heated argument, not necessarily physical. Either way, no bueno.

    • AmelieOriginal says:

      You can be flushed due to just being angry. People tend to get flushed when they shout, scream, and yell. Maybe they were being physical in the sense they were waving their arms around, stomping, pacing around. Also they could also be flushed due to angry tears. Not saying a physical altercation didn’t take place but having a flushed face doesn’t immediately imply that there was some kind of physical assault.

      • Feeshalori says:

        Of course, it could have been a very vocal argument, quarrel or disagreement. I doubt there would have been a physical fight before the relatives or even if it was just Charles at a funeral. Though if William was truly incandescent, he may have lost his self control then.

      • Becks1 says:

        oh for sure (I am one of those who flushes if I’m a little bit annoyed, I have zero poker face, lol.) That’s why I said it was at the very least a verbal fight. This wasn’t Charles just wandering up to them at the post funeral reception being like “boys lets just get along” out of nowhere.

        But that said, the fact that this excerpt is part of the same article as the physical assault expert makes me wonder if we aren’t supposed to assume that there was something physical (even if not a fight, William grabbing Harry’s arm or something.)

      • Feeshalori says:

        Yep, when my temper flares or l get annoyed, my face gets very rosy. Who knows what words or exchanges were made post funeral that got those men flushing. And Charles has earned each one of those years of misery.

    • Liz Version 700k says:

      You get the feeling that no one ever intervened to protect Harry after Diana died

  14. Snuffles says:

    Charles is like “Please boys. I’m THIS CLOSE to The Crown. Mummy is sure to die in the next year, don’t RUIN my moment forcing me to pay attention to someone else besides myself!”

    • what's inside says:

      Yep, this rings completely true. Thanks for putting it out there because that is exactly what I think.

  15. girl_ninja says:

    Charles made Diana’s whole life a misery so his final years being a misery is due. He wasn’t/isn’t a good parent and now he will suffer for it.

    • Tessa says:

      He cut Diana loose after she had the two children. He was said to tell her no more children. Had she been around, I think things would have been very different. There is more to being a father than just begetting, it is a lifetime role and the way he treated their mother was awful.

    • Liz Version 700 says:

      Absolutely. Charles has earned his misery on every level

  16. Tessa says:

    Whining Charles. If Charles had committed to the marriage with Diana and left Camilla, things could have been better. He didn’t do this but had a chance to raise his sons well. He messed up when he let Will run amok and let Harry be scapegoated. Too little too late for Charles.

  17. Chantal says:

    C-Rex sucks all day, every day, and in every way.

  18. Solidgold says:

    Chuck is no leader. Just a coward in nice suits.

  19. ChillinginDC says:

    I honestly do feel bad for Charles on this. Because based on everything that is coming out. William is a rage monster and a POS they created and could not control. And they all wanted Harry to just eat it. He put his freaking hands on Harry. And talked shit about his wife. F William, Kate, and Camilla. No wonder the Queen started meeting with Harry secretly, she probably realized there was no other way to even get around this mess.

  20. Gm says:

    They are going to make you miserable. William there with you demanding and angry and Harry far away and talking.

  21. B says:

    Every time I hear a quote from KC, all I hear in the subtext is “me me me me me me me me me me me me me.”
    Is there any credible evidence that KC has ever spontaneously worried about how not to add misery to someone else’s life?

    I would think a king’s subtext should be “the good of my people.”

  22. JJ says:

    I don’t like that Charles said that at all. Please boys? Only one of his boys was leaking against the other, having members of his staff involved in lambasting and harassing Meghan through a lawsuit and was later rewarded with some honor from the palace, bullied, maligned and used signed their brother’s name to a statement he had no part of and “Boys, don’t make my last years a misery?” He should call out William for his abuse of Harry. Don’t equate talking about the abuse with the acts of abuse. They are not equivalent.

  23. Julia K says:

    Charles is afraid of William. Charles would like to live out his normal life span and avoid a confrontation that could result in early demise.

  24. JMoney says:

    You reap what you sow. This isn’t just Charles but the saying is (and has been verified by therapists) is the relationship you have with your adult children is reflective of the type of relationship you had with them when they were young. Relationships take time and effort and when you’re raised entitled and getting everything your way always this is the result.

  25. Val says:

    More speculation.

    • Saucy&Sassy says:

      Val, that’s why the book is important. We can put these extracts in context. It won’t be speculation then.