Jodie Turner Smith ‘refused to settle for something that didn’t feel right’

Jodie Turner Smith filed for divorce from Joshua Jackson on or around October 2. While the vibe had been “off” for much of the past year, people really did love them as a couple and the split seemed sudden. The lack of gossip in the wake of Jodie’s divorce filing is notable too – no one is saying that it was for sure this thing or that thing. When “sources close to Jodie” spoke to People Magazine last week, they were careful with their words too, saying: “She decided that she is done. They are on very different paths in life. Jodie loves being a mom. She also loves working. It turned into an unhealthy marriage that made her unhappy.” Joshua was reportedly surprised that she filed too, so it wasn’t like this was the product of much conversation and soul-searching as a couple. This was Jodie doing the soul-searching on her own and deciding she was done. Us Weekly’s sources say much of the same:

Jodie Turner-Smith‘s decision to end her marriage to Joshua Jackson came after much soul-searching.

“She refused to settle for something that didn’t feel right,” the insider exclusively reveals in the newest issue of Us Weekly. “[It] wasn’t working for her, so she ripped off the Band-Aid.”

According to the source, Turner-Smith, 37, has moved into a hotel in Los Angeles while she and Jackson, 45, figure out their next steps. Us originally confirmed on October 2, that the actress filed for divorce from Jackson after four years of marriage. She cited irreconcilable differences for the split and listed September 13 as the duo’s date of separation in her court paperwork.

After news of their split made headlines, a second source told Us that Jackson didn’t expect for Turner-Smith to call it quits.

“Joshua was clearly caught off guard by Jodie’s decision to divorce,” an insider shared. “They had their issues, as many couples do — especially two busy actors who are also juggling a child. Joshua obviously didn’t realize it was this bad, that Jodie was this unhappy.”

[From Us Weekly]

Maybe this is why there’s no gossip about some kind of inciting incident, no big blowup fight or accusations of infidelity spilling out. It was just Jodie deciding that she wasn’t happy and she wasn’t getting what she wanted or needed out of the marriage, and she was done. It reminds me of Adele – years after her divorce, she talked about how she realized that she was just unhappy with her first husband and that’s why she left. Adele talked about feeling ashamed that she wasn’t happy, that her marriage fell apart so quickly and all of that. It doesn’t sound like Jodie has any regrets though!

Photos courtesy of Cover Images, Avalon Red.

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49 Responses to “Jodie Turner Smith ‘refused to settle for something that didn’t feel right’”

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  1. Snuffles says:

    My BFF, who NEVER pays attention to celebrity gossip, texted me the news and was like “DAYUM! What happened!?” I was surprised she actually liked them as a couple.

  2. Kitten says:

    Ok so I admire how decisive she was about this. She didn’t hang around, beating a dead horse–she just cut the cord and left. I just wish for their sake, that she had made this decision BEFORE the baby. But life doesn’t always work out the way we want and I have no doubt that baby will be loved, even if it’s not the ideal parenting situation.

    But the narrative that Josh didn’t know how bad the relationship was is giving me red flag vibes because like, how? Was there really THAT much of a break-down in communication or is he just that far up his own ass or what? I just don’t understand these stories (whether real or PR) that the other partner was blindsided. Like, there were NO clues? Nothing that made him think that she was unhappy? Something ain’t right about that…

    • Mariana says:

      If he was actually blindsided, I’m sure it was because he hadn’t been listening, not because she wasn’t talking.

      My sister is going through that currently: finally pulled the trigger and filed for divorce. Her husband was absolutely shocked. SHOCKED after 21 years of her telling him what was wrong and him not ACTUALLY listening.

      • Kitten says:

        Yes exactly. It makes him sound like a self-involved asshole, honestly. And yes, we’ve all dated those guys that are comfortably checked-out for the duration of the relationship and they are pure HELL to be with. It bums me out a bit because if this narrative is true, it means that Josh didn’t nurture the relationship at all and didn’t make Jodi feel safe and loved.

      • Dlc says:

        I’m happy to say my partner and I worked things out, but it was close. A year of me saying things bothered me. Initiating counseling. It wasn’t until he realized that I was actually thinking of calling int that he freaked out and started working.

      • B says:

        It’s all the gender role and misogynistic brainwashing, combined with fear for the children in the custody order, that women that keeps them trapped for 21 years.

        I liked Jodie before but now I really like her.

        The “I was so surprised” response – do the men actually not realize that when they say that they are dog tagging themselves as an absolutely shiesty partner? I think they don’t!

      • Lucy says:

        My sister in law had the same thing, with an emotionally, verbally and financially abusive ex husband. She told him for years, she had family tell him, she had their priest tell him. Then when she filed he was shocked because they “had the perfect marriage.” He was such a bully.

      • Concern Fae says:

        I remember when I made the appointment with the couple’s therapist, she asked if I was willing to fight for the relationship. I realized I wasn’t. I’d put in work if I felt some effort coming from my husband, but we had gone past the point where I would put up with any reluctance on his part.

        I think sometimes it’s just seeing what the relationship has become and what it would take to make it what you want. And those can be choices made very early on, without realizing that patterns were being set.

      • Jaded says:

        I spent a decade in a relationship that slowly unraveled, and despite me telling him repeatedly the things that were driving me nuts he chose to ignore me. When I finally told him I was done he got angry, freaked out, insisted on counseling, and when I made it clear I was not going back he proposed. He thought I was just manipulating him into getting married. SMH…I have a feeling Josh is that kind of guy, someone who generally sticks his head in the sand and avoids accountability in a relationship.

      • Margot says:

        Well and even if he WAS blindsided, that’s something he should work through with his personal therapist or counselor (“I didn’t see this coming. I’m questioning everything I thought I understood.”). It’s wrong and gross to use it as PR fodder.

    • Yup, Me says:

      I bet he is absolutely that far up his own ass. A lot of men are, anyway. A relatively wealthy white man who has been famous since his dipshit teen years who has managed to keep most of his hair and age pretty well. Psssssh. Insufferable.

      The way he was dining out on that story of her proposing to him made me side eye him. He was a little too smug with it. I’d be willing to bet he NEVER thought she would leave him while she’s still building her career. He’s HIM! (and whatnot).

      • Kitten says:

        Your last paragraph–YES. Hell, I side-eyed his story about her enjoying watching him hook up with actresses on-screen. It just felt ….not real. Like, this is HIM saying that she enjoys that, not HER. And ya know, maybe she does enjoy that but I just feel like it wasn’t his place to disclose something so personal in such an obviously egocentric way too. Either way, I sensed the impending doom when I read that interview…

      • Diana says:

        Kitten, Jodie said it first a year before he did. It wasn’t like he just brought it up, he was asked the question in an interview about Fatal Attraction. He could of worded it better, sure.

      • Kitten says:

        Do you have a link to the interview where she said that? Because I’ve only ever heard him bring that up–never her.

    • CommentingBunny says:

      Not saying this is what happened between these two because I have no idea. But the wording definitely reminded me of the video about how some men expect women to live with a tolerable level of of permanent unhappiness.

      • ThinkFirst says:

        This was such a thought-provoking link. Thanks for sharing it!

      • Meh says:

        This link. Eye opening and so true. Thank you for sharing, @CommentingBunny. I just filed for divorce from my husband of 20 years, and it has been so painful, and I feel so much self-doubt about whether I’m doing the right thing. I’ve been trying to address the problems in the marriage for 20 years, to no avail. He shrugs and continues scrolling on his phone, while I have continued down a spiral of loneliness and pain. I’ve been in a “tolerable level of permanent unhappiness” for two decades, and the only choice left was to stop talking and start acting. He’s not happy about the divorce at all, but I have spent two decades sacrificing myself for a man who absolutely will not hear what I am saying. Good for Jodie in her decisiveness, clarity, and taking action.

      • jjva says:

        Meh — I hear you — I was there and I left after 15 years. I could have written this: “He’s not happy about the divorce at all, but I have spent two decades sacrificing myself for a man who absolutely will not hear what I am saying.” You will be so much happier on the other side. I promise. You are stronger than you think. I like to say that these days I’m out of the “trying to make a grown man do things” game. They’ll do it or they won’t, and there’s your answer. It sounds like you have yours, and you’re doing what you need to do. You will come back to life when you are out of this, I promise. <3

      • Meh says:

        @jjva Thank you times a million.

      • LongThymeLurker says:

        MIND. BLOWN. Commentingbunny! I recently broke up with my live-in partner of 5 years because I don’t know how many times we had discussions that we need to both do things around the house, issues that upset me, etc. and nada. I wanted to still date my partner, but not break up. He said it would be too hard (insert eye roll) and my therapist said she guesses I was good enough to clean the house and do his laundry, etc. but not continue to date. She was absolutely right.

      • Andrea says:

        @CommentingBunny That link blew me away. I have left partners as I have described below and I think sometimes we, as women, don’t want to believe that some men simply don’t care about our feelings. But some men simply do not. As long as they are happy, they don’t care about ours. I find those unacceptable terms, why I have peaced out when I have been unhappy and no changes occurred. I long for an understanding, emotionally mature partner to spend my life with. I am still looking and still hopeful at 42.

      • lizbert says:

        I can’t even count how many times I’ve heard men describe their female partners’ “bitchiness” in the months leading up to the women leaving them, then being absolutely shocked and devastated *massive eyeroll* Look my dudes, if you characterize your partner’s expressions of unhappiness as “bitchiness” you need to put on your listening pants as you’re likely the source of the unhappiness. Full f*ck1ng stop.

    • JustStop says:

      when one partner travels a lot, let alone when both partners travel a lot, it can be very easy to miss big issues on either side. It’s a very different situation when you’re not together on a daily basis.

  3. Veronica S. says:

    Aww, that’s a shame. They were a cute couple. With a lot of these situations where women initiate, I just wonder if she wasn’t speaking up or if he wasn’t listening. So many men are raised to obliviousness when it comes to the needs of their partners. Things are rarely abrupt in retrospect when you start putting together the pieces.

    • Lily says:

      The part about him not realizing she was that unhappy kind if makes me think he wasn’t listening or was downplaying her unhappiness. Or at least, I’d like to think so, because if a guy did the same to me and filed for divorce without any talking beforehand, I’d be pretty pissed.

  4. Hereforthegossip says:

    I love them both and I believe that he was blindsided by the divorce filing. I think that they were prob having problems overtime-No one cheated or did anything heinous. She just did some soul-searching made a decision with HERSELF and then pulled the trigger WITHOUT talking to him so she wouldn’t second guess herself.

  5. Smart&Messy says:

    I don’t get JJ’s appeal at all. Off screen he looks so eurotrash to me. And sleazy. In pictures she looks so out of his league. In those j.crew ads she looked she was humoring him by letting him be in some of HER photos.

    Is Jodie an actress or a model? After Queen and Slim has she been in anything notable? They keep referencing Mistery Murder 2, but that was a glorified cameo for her.

    • MF says:

      I agree. I don’t find him attractive. He’s just sorta plain to me. Meanwhile, she looks like a high fashion model.

      She’s also a way better actor than he is. I know relationships are not about looks or talent but she’s way out of his league.

    • Torttu says:

      I can’t stand him, and he has an annoying voice.
      Fatal Attraction remake tanked because it’s terrible.

    • Flamingo says:

      dang, why you gotta dog Pacey like that!

  6. Flower says:

    This does not surprise me one bit.

    I never got the impression that he reaffirmed their love publicly – instead he just seemed to put things out there that humiliated her.

    I hope they both go their separate ways and find happiness/.

    • Diana says:

      There are plenty of times that he reaffirmed his love for her publicly, both in interviews and on his social media.

  7. Amy Bee says:

    I think she realised she should have just remained has girlfriend instead of marrying him.

  8. Ameerah M says:

    Ultimately a person has to do what gives them peace. I loved them as a couple but if she wasn’t fulfilled in the relationship she made the right choice to leave.

  9. AnneL says:

    I like them both and I wish them both the best. Hopefully they can co-parent well.

    I never watched “Dawson’s” but I watched Joshua on “The Affair” and thought he was quite good. I get why some people think he’s nothing special compared to her but he does have a certain appeal.

  10. Scorpiomoon says:

    Aw, I was really rooting for them. And dang—he really screwed up, messing things up with a woman like that. She is so so gorgeous—like, she’s breathtaking in how luminous she looks. But she also has this very regal vibe, and always comes across as so thoughtful, articulate, and powerful in her interviews, it doesn’t really surprise me that when she decided she was done, she acted swiftly and decisively. Hope it doesn’t get nasty—he seemed to really mature and come into his own through their relationship, hope the best for their kiddo.

  11. Andrea says:

    I have ended all 3 of my LTRs because they started to not feel good or right. The last one I was engaged to. I get massive comments from women who are shocked I didnt try to change the men or stick it out and theyve made comments how I am so much stronger than them. I dont think what I did was that unique or special. My 2nd LTR was an alcoholic and after trying to get him on anxiety meds and go into therapy for a solid year and him refusing to change, I gave up.

    I also have had terrible breakups where the men cry and thretean and dont get it when I told them for months how unhappy I was. My first bf I had to call the cops on when I broke up with him (first LTR). I have been told by a lot of my exes that I was the first woman to leave them and I think they thought it would never happen. Men’s egos can be very fragile and I imagine Josh was like that. Good for Jodie for leaving rather than dragging it out.

  12. KP says:

    It’s interesting. I follow both on socials and honestly if anyone comes across as up their own ass it is her. She also seems to need an entourage around all the time. I noticed how because she posts all the time in stories and her BFF does too that she and JJ were never alone once the lockdowns ended. I mean the mother-in-law lived them from the jump but I assumed it was because with the baby they needed help though they had a nanny as well. Once people began going out again-she included the BFF and her brother. They never went on vacation without her family and she posted it as did they. His family never seemed to be around. He even talked about only taking one job year as to not be away. She booked a lot out of pandemic so he traveled to be with her and kid. The issues seemed to start when he went to film FA and left her in Miami where she was filming a small part in a movie. They had to balance who had their child when.

    And sorry it is crappy not to tell your partner you are filing if this is not a domestic situation. She could have emailed or texted. To do it on a Monday morning and make it splashy and then be coming out with all the spin. Side eye.

    It was crappy when Joe Jonas did it to Sophie and it is crappy here. By settle I think she means compromise. Which is part of life and yes marriage. No one gets. Everything they want. And because she is so willing to share it all-it seems once he pushed back on things she did not like it. Her right but going out of your way to try and hurt and embarrass your partner. Nah. Not a fan when anyone does it.

    Just say it didn’t work out. You do not need to justify it. When you are continuously spinning this hard it makes me side eye you.

    • Andrea says:

      I dunno, as I wrote above, I refuse to settle for something that does not feel right either. It had nothing to do with compromise. One of my exes was an alcoholic and some women have said to me I should have settled for him to have someone and because he had money. No thank you. If you find some behavior(s) unacceptable and they don’t change, leave.

      • Kirsten says:

        Yeah, leaving someone who’s an alcoholic and creating a problematic home life isn’t the same as leaving someone because you’re country-hopping from party-to-party and your spouse isn’t crazy about it. It isn’t a compromise at all to stay with someone in a toxic relationship, but it is a reasonable compromise to co-parent more equitably.

    • Abigail says:

      I agree and I think it’s utter hypocrisy that everyone is giving her a pass and pretending she can do no wrong. If the roles were reversed and he was the one who suddenly filed for divorce stating he refused to settle for something that didn’t feel right, everyone would be crucifying him.

  13. Jenna says:

    I like her. I like him. Do we always have to blame the man? Maybe he did see this coming but was powerless to stop the relationship from ending. People grow. People change. Relationships end. It might not be something that he did – or something that he missed. But who knows. This is celebrity gossip and purely conjecture for ALL of us. I wish them both the best. He’s such a hawt daddy. She’s
    Blessedly beautiful.

  14. shirurusu says:

    First of all – damn she’s gorgeous. Like, wow!

    Second of all – I always read him as being overbearing, and not a single one of his girlfriends seem to have been happy with him. He seems like a nice guy, but “nice guys” can be great as friends and totally exhausting in relationships sometimes.

    Anyway, his loss for sure

    • KP says:

      That’s a bit of a stretch. He and Katie Holmes dated and by all accounts he ended it and they stayed friends. She even followed him on insta and he was one of the first people she called when she left TC.

      Rosario Dawson is another close friend. He was at her fashion event in NY recently and they hang with each other. She was his ex before Diane and they ended in good terms

      He was Diane for 10 years which in Hollywood is a long time. She has revealed herself to be kinda of a jerk and she cheated so you know.

      So on this one’s juries out but usually the one spinning the hardest is the one to suspect.

    • Aurora says:

      I beg to difer. I distinctly remember him taking roses to Katie after her theatre debut, while she was still with Cruise. He also seems to have ended in amicable terms with Diane; at least on IG. Some ppl say he and Diane were in an open relationship ; his comments and his pic kissing someone at the airport before they got married show that Jodie might have tried to entertain that feature until she didn’t. What if she didn’t give him a heads up? It’s fine if she woke up one day and said ‘I don’t want what he wants’.

  15. Lucy says:

    My husband of 15 years said he was “blindsided” when I left him, but I’d been telling him what I needed for six of those years and he hadn’t been willing to change anything. (I wasn’t asking for the moon, I just wanted to not be the only parent after our kid was born.)

    When I ended it, he said “I knew you were sad, but I thought marriage was forever,” and I think a lot of people think that way: they think we won’t leave them, even if we’re perpetually sad and find our marriages intolerable, because we signed a contract. I think that if you’re paying attention to your marriage, you’re not going to be blindsided by a divorce.

    • Andrea says:

      Men are very complacent and do not like change or to rock the boat. My friend’s mother left his father after a year of therapy and 30 years together total. He felt blindsided, but she had been unhappy she told me 10 years and he knew this, but ignored it and refused to make any changes whatsoever or be open to travel. Thankfully, she left because 6 years later she died and she had never been happier traveling etc. in those 6 years prior to her death.

  16. Katie Beanstalk says:

    I thought Joshua was funny in Cruel Intentions.