We’ve been trying to generally ignore Heidi and Spencer stories as there are plenty of them, and recent reports indicate that these two may be playing a hoax on the media with a separation that just happens to coincide with Heidi’s new reality show. It could be genuine, though, and Heidi just might have filed for legal separation in time to ensure that Spencer doesn’t get his mitts on her salary. (She could have also done it to try and quash the hoax rumors.) Radar reported that Heidi filed for separation right after Spencer got his final check from The Hills, for $675,000. That may sound like a fortune, but it’s nothing compared to the amounts these two have already blown.

There’s a story in In Touch this week that’s worth mocking on how these famewhores wasted a few million in just a few months. These two blew what could last most of us years on luxury goods, security staff, cars, and plastic surgery. The most expensive thing they bankrolled was Heidi’s idiotic music career. Their alleged breakup is all due to the fact that they’re strapped for cash and need to figure out a way to get the public interested in them again. Here’s the breakdown:

$100,000 on shoes and bags
Heidi has at least six Hermes Birkin bags worth $54,122 and a $22,000 Balenciaga Crocodile Weekender.

$30,000 to her family
Heidi’s pal Paul Zank says she helped her mom pay her mortgage so she didn’t lose her house

$2 million on Heidi’s music
“Within the first week, we will definitely make our money back,” said Heidi. Sadly, they didn’t.

$500,000 on cars
Over the years, Spencer and Heidi have bought a Porsche, a Rolls-Royce and a vintage Camara

$500,000 on crystals
Spencer admits his obsession with crystals left him with $203 in his bank account

$400,000 on protection
Aside from the gun he bought, Spencer hired ex Marines to be bodyguards for the couple.

More on this story
“They are completely broke,” an insider tells In Touch, noting that their dwindling popularity is to blame. “Their income has dropped – but their spending habits have not,” explains the insider. And they buy things for no reason whatsoever. “Heidi has never met a designer bag that she didn’t have to have,” says a source. “And Spencer spends all of his money on gadgets, including professional night vision equipment and telescopes.”

Because of their irresponsible spending habits, Spencer, who made about $65,000 per episode on The Hills, and Heidi, who raked in a cool $100,000 per episode, are now reportedly living on credit until they find new ways to make money. The insider believes that the couple decided to break up in order to get their names in the headlines – and score a paycheck. Though once famous for staging ridiculous photo shoots, which generated tens of thousands of dollars, photos of Heidi, 23, and Spencer, 26, are barely worth anything these days. “They used to have six figure deals,” the insider reveals, “but the money is drying up.”

Their divorce drama may get the cash flowing again, but the insider warns that what began as a publicity stunt could spin out of control. “This could be a case of life imitating art… If they don’t start making money, their split could actually turn out to be real.”

[From In Touch, print edition, June 21, 2010]

Meanwhile Star Magazine is reporting that Heidi had a “pregnancy scare” and was worried that she got pregnant by Spencer before their split, but that she took a test and it was negative. These two really will do anything to keep their names in the headlines. I guess we’ll know it was a sham if they get back together as part of the plot of Heidi’s new reality show, as has been speculated. We may still be inundated with news about these fools, but at least we can point and laugh at them for wasting all that money and still living like slobs.